>And your name, please?

>>25661140

ElIiot

SARGENT SLAUGHTER

Bigdick Rick.

Bigdick is one word.

>>25661140
"Andy"

>not actually my name
>it's my middle name
>just give it to them because it's easier to pronounce that my first name and is IMPOSSIBLE to confuse
>not even that my first name is super complicated, they just still always manage to fuck up

>>25661140
xX_pu$$y_d3stroyR_Xx

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Ellen. I always say Ellen, not even a joke.

u-u two

>>25661140
I thought her hat said dicks

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>>25661140
god I fucking hate this
>stutter name
>"what anon?"
>make up new simpler name on the spot.
>that look when you sign the receipt
kill me

>>25661140

EIIiot

I'm I. P. Freely

>Yeah its Spyridon
>.....uhh.....
>just put Spiros
>...uhhhhh......
>Leo is fine

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>>25661207
thanks for the keks

super original comment here

>>25661167
>>25661277
literally what?

what?

>>25661140
The starbucks barista I see a lot always says "Good day to you kind sir" And bows and does that with one of those gay ye olde englishe accents and I just say "Thanks" like an American and order my Grande Super Big Huge Sugar Rush Chocolate Drink with Caffeine please and he gives me that and I give him my money and I go

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>>25661289
hello reddit

>commentoriginal

>>25661222
Why, trips-chan?

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>>25661167
underrated post
and original commento

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>>25661353
It's funny confusing them. They always double take, and I explain it's my real name. If they doubt me I have a fake ID that says "Ellen Claesson" on it.

>>25661140
I am anon

>>25661186
NIGGAS KNOW I FED EX MY SHIT
OVERNIGHT EXPRESS MY SHIT
DELIVER MY HITS QUICK
WHO NEXT ON MY SHIT LIST
BANANA NIGGAS NEED TO SPLIT
QUIT FUCKING WITH THIS

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>>25661412
>I have a fake ID that says "Ellen Claesson" on it.
Why?

>>25661478
Truly these lyrics are the masterpieces of our time to be remembered and recited for eons beyond.

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>>25661483
Literally just so that I can fuck with people and prove that my name is Ellen.

>>25661140
Never actually had a problem. I'm super quiet and have a borderline speech problem but they seem to get "Oliver" right

>>25661680
That's pretty baller dude, how'd you get it?

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>drinking the caffeinated jew

Senpai what are you doing?

Mannie Dixon Myas

I said my name was Adolf once. Not sure why I did it. Even better was that the barista didn't even blink, just wrote down Adolf on the cup.

Not even German.

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>>25661207
awesome XD(serious)

>>25661955
>coffee is too bitter for my little bitch mouth
Black coffee master race

>>25662095
yeah, I'm gonna need her name and/or more

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMfg3Cq-LmA
Because of this I do it every time

>>25662095
>>25662220
pls if you're still there anon

>>25662190
>Not waking up early and going for a run around the neighborhood.
Are you perhaps a prole?

Hugh


you're just going to write Q or Hue or "what" anyways, so idgaf

>>25662512
Kay tropic mate

Nott M. Portent

Tom Solversdoe

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>>25661140
daddy

abc123

>>25662644
Thank you and God bless, anon

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>>25661140
Randy Lahey.

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>>25662512
kya atk

>>25661140

Mike Hawk.

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>tfw the qt petite barista knows my name and asks me how I'm doing everyday

I fucking hate this so much

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I sometimes lie about my name when they ask me. I'm not sure why I do it but I get a little buzz when I do so I just haven't stopped

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>"What's the name on that?"
>Kyle
>"Carl?"
>Kyle
>"Tyler?"
>Kyle
>"Ok Brian."

Why do I have one of the softest, shittest, names ever.

Hi! My name is Merry Christmas!

>>25663732
I now pronounce you Gryffindor.

Sorted.

>>25663593
So...why don't you just ask her out?

original comment

>>25663593
>proof that robots' bad luck with women is their own fault

>>25663790
I just don't know

There is no point since I'm a pathetic piece of shit

>>25663870
I just can never tell and when I do realize someone might like me it scares the shit out of me

I think I have intimacy issues

>>25661140
Daddy Loooooongdick. And keep the change you fuckin black bitch

>>25663068
That's literally my name
Except it's spelled "Hawke"
Fuck you

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>>25661167
Very low key

Max.

They usually get it right, aside from the occasional "Mac."

Also, Starbucks cashier girls always try to flirt with me, but they're always fat.

I go with an unconventional fake name so they have to ask me how to spell it. If I say my real name, they either butcher it or write the feminine version of the name.

>>25665194
>>Also, Starbucks cashier girls always try to flirt with me, but they're always fat.
Approximately all retail workers hate customers you know. they act bubbly and nice because they'll get written up or fired if they don't.

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>>25661140
Aric
And I fucking hate it. Barely original name, a twist on a shitty boring name.

>>25661283
>tfw unpronounceable greek name

I feel you

>>25661140
The name's Daddy ;)

i'm a starbucks barista and you're all pathetic

>>25665555
ayyy pos se lene?

>>25665398
Better than that one faggot named "Elevator"
That guy's parents owe me a new pair of sides

>>25665607
>professional cuck here, please tip me because I thought it would be cool to major in theoretical basket weaving
FTFY

>>25665639
nah I'm only 19 and this is the highest paying job I can get at the moment. I make $10/hr and that's quite above the average where I live (min wage is $8.05)

>>25661140
Next time a fast food employee asks me for my name I should just read theirs off their name tag to fuck with them.

>>25661483
>>25661412
hello redditors
please remember to drink bleach before going to bed tonight! :)

>>25661140
Hugh Janus.

>>25665723
I'm also a barista, but I make 11.25 cus Cucknadia.

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>>25661140
Hitler, dear untermensch. I hope you're not late getting back to your concentration camp after your shift, and your nation thanks you for being patriotic enough to work and serve this great German machine even in your containment program that's necessary to purify our superior genes. Us ubermensch appreciate a subhuman who knows its place, you're helping give our children a brighter future. Your legacy in not in children but in great deeds for all of mankind, fellow citizen.

>>25665875
>canadabux
That's probably less than federal minimum in Burgerland shekels.

I go to starbucks like twice a year so just call me "bob"

>>25665919
Tru
The exchange rate is shit, and we have a cuck time telling meme PM now, so it's probably only gonna get worse.
But hey
M8
GANJA
ROFL

>>25665949
>I go to starbucks like twice a year so just call me "bob"
what a fucking unfunny retard post
just give up

>>25665949
Your names Neil and Bob?
Or is that just what you do?

>>25665994
sucking dick is just what you do

I always sperg out and give them my last name

>>25665969
>cuck time telling meme
top lel I've never heard it said that way. Does he seriously stand up and inform you maple niggers what year it is?

Although, fuck me, I guess Obama pretty much does that too, I just tune out that glorified AA-hire these days. It's been a long seven years, m8.

>>25661140
Sylus

>>25665991
butthurt starsucks enthusiast normalslime pls go and stay go

hi my name is mr gay man LOL

>>25666224
lol ur bent

>>25666210
nice projecting m8
you learn those cool internet tricks at reddit?

>>25661324

You don't pay attention to details much, do you...

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>>25661324
New here, are you?

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>>25661140
MoonMan

heh

>>25666149
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLk2aSBrR6U

>>25661202
what's the first letter of your first name?

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>>25666149
It's a great time to be a Cucknadian

https://youtu.be/LLk2aSBrR6U

>>25665639
While that is a becoming an hero name. My name is ruthless because if I'm wearing a name tag, mention my name with anyone, or at any appointment that involves my name. It's a ten minute conversation every time asking what it means and how to pronounce. ARE-ic, ore-ic, and a lot of middle eastern pronunciation. When all it is, is a boring ass name, with a different letter in the beginning, literally phonetically Eric but with an A. I want to change my name but picking anew name is not only gay, but also hard. Jason lemon sounds cool cause 'mr.lemon' sounds awesome but Jason is a fag name.

>>25666342
please tell me this cunt isnt going to be elected

>Bought a coffee once
>Didn't know they asked for a name
>Repeated my order to her, she looks at me blankly
>N-no I need a name to call out...
>Yeah well I'm getting a cappuccino
>Girl looks like she might cry
>It's a..I need it for the your name (her words)
>Oh..it's anon
>Thanks, thank you
>Okay
>Takes an unreasonable amount of time to be ready
>She doesn't even call out my name and just looks at me and nods awkwardly because I could stand by the counter waiting, there was no one else coming in

And then I never bought an over priced coffee in a shitty cardboard cup again. That chick had less confidence than me even, I wanted to throatfuck her.

>>25666385
Top qt
Throatfuck my waifu and I'll lynch you, nigger

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Maximus Decimus Herclitoris

Chris. But sometimes I say Michael, since that's my middle name.

It's matt but they always here mac. I dont correct them either

>>25661167
and then you idly fantasize about throwing you drink on her

>>25666385
>N-no I need a name to call out...
>Yeah well I'm getting a cappuccino
my sides

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>>25661680
You are the pinnacle.

>>25665626
>3 ellines se ena threat

ti simbainei

JOHN CENA!
[music blasts in the background

>>25669225
haha do dodo dooo

>>25663790
>>25663870
>implying she's not just being extra nice because he's a regular
>implying she's not getting railed by a different Chad every week
Be realistic you cunts

I said kirito once

>>25669189
xamos filaraki

>>25661140

The name thing doesnt bother me.
When they ask for my phone number, though...

>>25661207
I'm still laughing at this.

>>25673368
You have to be older than 18 to post on here, buckaroo

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>>25661140
>"Oskar."
>look at cup
>Bosco

>>25673381
I'm tired and it caught me off guard. Don't expect that stuff on r9k.

>>25665140
first time seeing him smiling

>>25673468
ooh boy did you miss those two threads with all the rare Elliots?

Daniel Tremblay.

>>25661140
nigger, my names nigger!

>>25673479
apparently, yes

original comment

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Thomas

How autistic am i for not just calling myself Tom?

>>25661140

I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND

STOP HITTING ON ME

>Your order will be ready soon
>what's your name?
>I am Spartacus

>>25661140
obviously it's "allahu akbar"

>>25673440
Shouldn't you be running off to school now, little Anthony?

>>25661140
>Going to a coffee shop in the first place
It's and easier and cheaper and better for me to just pick up the ingredients myself and make it at home. The only reason to go to such a place is to be around other people and indulge in the "M-maybe something will hap-pp-ppen today!!!" meme dream.

Nothing will ever happen. Nothing ever happens to us. Stop wasting your money and time on this garbage and quit posting this like it's an actually difficult problem, you failed normie fucks.

>Adam
>they write Aedam
What the FUCK.

i registered an account on the website of the local cinema with a fake last name "Boss" like Hugo Boss.

now every time i reserve tickets online and pick them up at the counter the employee calls me Mr. Boss.

LOL

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>>25661167
nice.

aSASASDASDFASDADAS

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>>25666343
>but Jason is a fag name.

Wanna say that again?

>>25661140
SEXMACHINE

>>25669225
Good funny meme aha! I love the John Cena vines

Upboated

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>>25673847
Jason is a fa-

>>25661140
Long and strong Dave