>>25624218 >order penis pump of deep web >must be the model as seen in Austin Powers International Man of Mystery, all other models have been proven too faulty >start by giving your knob 3-5 pumps morning and just before bed >work up to 8 pumps twice a day after 1 week >on the day of inspection give it one more go before you leave the house
>grade four p.i.d. >balls still haven't dropped >rest of class waiting their turn, they drop underwear and get the once-over of the shaft and a firm cupping of the scrot' from the male nurse and visual inspection from the principal >very self conscious that all the other boys have well defined sacks at this point >look at my instruction sheet, it only states that a student must present his penis for inspection, nothing about balls >it's my turn, slip the peen through the pisshole on my tighty whiteys >principal gets pissed, tells me to pull down my "panties" >rest of the class bursts out laughing >I double down, insist I am adhering to the letter of the law >school bully yells out I'm hiding a maxi pad >nearly in tears at this point, I don't know if I even finish the inspection process but the nurse mercifully gives me a passing mark
I'm convinced that day set me on the robot path, though looking back j clearly had some robotic tendencies
I miss penis inspection days. It was the one day I felt competent and people looked up to me.
>be me >ugly, autistic, scrawny kid >great penis >long, thick shaft >perfectly retractable foreskin >appropriate amount of pubic hair >aesthetically shaped frenulum with no blemishes >always get top marks >penis inspect nurses are still the only people to have ever touched my penis.
>>25625460 What the fuck. You don't have penis inspection day? Is your country full of STDs?
>>25624218 My first time I was too scared to let the school nurse do it. I cried and screamed until they called my mom.
She came an hour later when I was in class, pissed that I made her miss work. Instead of taking me back to the nurse's office she ripped off my pants in front of the class, had the nurse inspect me, and then just left me with my pants down without saying a word.
Never had penis inspection day at school because my mom inspected it at home. She didn't trust the teachers to do the proper job.
But now that I'm a working man it's been strange getting my penis inspected there. I asked my boss if my mother could do it but he said no. It has to be done by a certified Penis Inspection Institute. Oh well.
My annual penis inspection is coming up at the end of the month. Last year I did pretty well. What scent should I blast my penis with before the inspection? Last year I used Summer Rain.
>PID in 6th grade >literally the only guy in class without pubes >my last name is at the end of the alphabet so i'm one of the last ones >i'm sweating bullets >the nurse unbuttons my pants and pulls down my tighty whiteys >nurse is so hot, i instantly get an erection when she cups my balls >my tiny, hairless boner is facing the rest of my class > BABY DICK DARREN BABY DICK DARREN the bully starts chanting > I was baby dick darren until I graduated college > I still get anxiety about going outside
Hey guys, I've been seeing this girl for a while and before we have sex she wants me to get my annual penis inspection renewed so she knows I'm clean but I'm worried I might have a disease because I fucked a prostitute in Thailand a couple months ago. How do I find a corrupt penis inspector nurse?
>>25625612 >be me >be a Slav >country has one of the lowest STD ratings in Europe >get a paper one day at school >need to get whole-body inspection >muh security >look at paper >one line says "sexual maturity, state of sex organs" >ohwell.jpg >averagepenis.gif >the day comes >I go to see doctor >be a bit shy while entering doc's room >give him the list >checks it >asks me a few questions, like "do you smoke", "have you ever had heart problems" >writes shit all over it >doesn't want to inspect me >mfw he ticked the penis part without checking out my junk >mfw country still has one of the lowest STD ratings >mfw country is not a health shithole like America >mfw life is good as a Slav
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