I've never met a girl with BPD who wasn't a massive sloot, every last one will cheat on their partners because their hearts can't be tamed. you have to be a literal cuck to get into a relationship with a BPD girl.
>>25540724 >>25540701 >>25540681 >>25538503 God fucking damn All these signs saying turn back but I just can't fucking do it I'll probably regret it But hey maybe this time will be different right bros :))
>>25540793 I've already found out. But then she stopped before I met her. And I know she's in a really bad place mentally, and it feels wrong to abandon someone I cared so much about, someone who seemed to really like me, even though they probably have 'support' from so many other beta orbiters.
>>25540819 >Can you tell me about your experience anon? I'll give you the short recap, found out she was fucking other guys, she tried to convince me it was okay, walked away with pain in my heart. every last girl with BPD is the same, more than the average woman, they have what'd you call a "floaty" heart that is incapable of staying loyal.
>>25541769 That's really sad. I'm going to ask her tomorrow about how she really feels about me, and confront her on her history of camwhoring, and see how it goes. I want to try to make things work, and I want to believe she can avoid fucking other guys behind my back, because we got along pretty well, and I care about them, but I don't know anymore.
>>25541875 it won't lead to anything meaningful, she'll change her ways for a couple months at most. I really do hope you can move on someday before the attachment becomes a liability to your own well-being, prepare yourself for the worst, start emotionally distancing yourself now.
>>25541972 clingy depressive introverted and then a fucking socialite horrible mood swings depends on you to provide her with happiness social anxiety but still feels lonely when deprived of human contact
basically it's a girl that will find a boyfriend to lock herself in with, mooch off him then blame him for shutting her away. there's no respite from her hatred of everything. the only thing the man can do is keep her distracted or the anguish will become overwhelming and her bouts of depression last for days. you end up struggling endlessly trying to keep her above water. if you try to break it off she will threaten suicide as she feels like you're the only thing keeping her anchored in the world. she will become more and more needy, depending on you for just about everything.
in short, it isn't tons of fun.
source: dated one for almost two years. within a month of dating she had already moved in with me.
>>25542161 The one I saw for a while was cheating when I met her. I wouldn't say she cheated on me since I never thought of her as my girlfriend to begin with and it's not cheating when there's no relationship.
>>25542126 dohoho you THINK you can handle it m8 you just wait 'til it's three AM and you're calling your co-workers to see if any of them have such and such book since she lost her copy on the bus and won't stop crying since "it was the sweetest book and made me feel better."
you just wait until you break it off, run away from your own fucking apartment to have her tackle you on the street.
you just wait until she locks herself out of the apartment naked so that you'll come back and let her in.
you just wait until you turn your phone off trying to get away from her for one day only to turn it on at 4am to discover she's been calling you nonstop for the last 24 hours.
YOU THINK YOU CAN FUCKING HANDLE IT M8, YOU JUST FUCKING WAIT.
i know a girl who is borderline, bipolar, and histrionic
i absolutely cannot stand her, she's a loud obnoxious drama queen and everything has to be about her. the only reason i think anyone puts up with her is because she's attractive. just hearing her voice makes my skin crawl.
You will start realizing how nice and soothing your days of human isolation are. Every little positive detail about your current lifestyle that you don't know about, will become clear to you once they are removed.
There are infinitely more upsides to being sad and alone than being within earshot of these people.
>>25542382 Heh it's been a while since I've listened to it, but now that you mention it >Syliva, get your head out of the oven really does resonate. I wish she would just let me in, we got along really well, and I really do care about her and want to help with whatever she's going through.
>>25540724 Agree. Dated a BPD chick who called all previous guys "experiments" and sucked cock like a veteran whore. Was a cunt 80% of the time. She hinted hard for me to dominate her, but it was frankly too much work. Crazy aside, she had about 200 lbs on me, so not like I'm gonna wrassle her. Last I heard she married an ugly cuck fedora during one of her medicated periods. I should feel mildly jealous I guess, but I genuinely feel bad for that guy. There's no way she's being faithful.
I think my exbf was BPD. >>25542308 Here is a description
>greatest person you will ever meet for the first few months of the relationship, does everything to please you, fakes their entire persona, calculated as fuck >after a few months, distance between you is made, you get cucked a couple times, cheated on frequently >you don't notice so you feel like shit and get blamed for everything going sour >you find out >BPD people have a tendency to make it all about them, so YOU end up apologizing for being cucked and forgiving your cucker >forgive the cheating, walk on eggshells for a few months because whenever you even remotely bring it up, you get blamed >they start withholding sex from you, only giving it to you if you fulfill their really fucked up fetishes >they continue cheating on you >you find out again >constant moodswings, hot-cold behaviour, one minute you're the best person in the world to them, the next minute you're an ugly fat cunt who deserves to be raped >more and more degenerate behavior as the relationship wanes >this post is correct >>25542079 >narcissism out of the anus >they WILL refuse therapy at all costs, until they are absolutely forced
Holy shit. BPD? Never again. They're like the human form of meth. People throw around "BPD" at everyone they disagree with but real borderlines are fucking evil. Breaking free from the clutches and not walking on eggshells is a godsend.
>>25542429 >Sylvia...Can't you see what you are doing >Can't you see I'm scared to speak and hate my voice because it only makes you angry >SYLVIA >I ONLY TALK WHEN YOU ARE SLEEPING >IT'S WHEN I TELL YOU EVERYTHING AND I IMAGINE THAT SOMEHOW YOU'RE GOING TO HEAR ME
>>25542642 Fucking hell man that's spot on. I can't tell if she's feeling really hurt and needs space or if she's just sick of my clingy ass. All I can do is wait. I hope she gives me a chance. I think it can work.
My BPD ex would claim that all his behaviour was normal, that cheating was normal, that ignoring people for weeks was normal.
They are also often fat. They don't have discipline or self control. They develop problems with food.
All of the problems they have that they need to get therapy for, they will not. They will make excuses. First it will be "oh I can't find a therapist" then it will be "oh therapy is no good" then they'll go for a couple sessions to appease you and claim they are cured, then they will just claim they are normal and you are the awful one.
They will cheat on you. No matter what. I'm willing to bet that most people with BPD just end up with harems, so that even the second you enter a relationship, you're already a cuck. My ex had a long term relationship with a married camwhore (who was going to leave her husband for him) while being in a relationship with me. While we were together he spent thousands on her. When I found out, guess who was at fault? Me. He yelled at me for a couple hours, then broke down crying. When they fuck up they will always want to make you feel bad. I was in a foreign country all alone and he wouldn't let me have any alcohol or do anything but stay in his apartment for a couple days because he was crying and telling me how scared he was that he was going to hurt himself w/o me, crying about how his parents never loved him and how he's a loser or someshit. Never once apologized for cheating on me and after I forgave him (rookie mistake) he literally tried transforming me into his ex (made me lose weight bc she was ana, wanted to try camwhoring with me, made me cut my hair and dress like her). I was ridiculously young and stupid at the time but seriously JUST DON'T DATE PEOPLE WITH BPD YOU WILL KILL YOURSELF TRYING TO PLEASE THEM
>>25543056 >All of the problems they have that they need to get therapy for, they will not. They will make excuses. First it will be "oh I can't find a therapist" then it will be "oh therapy is no good" then they'll go for a couple sessions to appease you and claim they are cured, then they will just claim they are normal and you are the awful one.
Oh now I'm more convinced than ever that my ex had this.
>>25543135 This is my first time in a long time talking about it in depth with /r9k/ and it is kind of cathartic.
Other shit that went down: >at the same time i found out about the married camwhore, i found out about multiple other girls too >one was a 16 year old from tumblr (borderlines always have tumblr, eh?) >two were 18 year old anorexic camwhores from tumblr (mind you, he was like 8-10 years older than them at the time)
I was fairly young myself, around 19 and had been with him for a while. I never snooped, because borderlines ALWAYS make you feel like you are walking on eggshells, so I was honestly afraid to. A couple months before, on my birthday, we watched a movie about a cheater. I got paranoid and started crying towards the end and brought it up to him, and he yelled at me for about an hour about how he is such a good guy, and went to sleep on the couch. On my fucking birthday.
I had a BMI of like 19 and he had a BMI of like 40. I had maintained my weight the best that I could since HS, struggling with university and health problems, etc. But after I found out about all this, to regain control he shifted the blame onto me. Complained that I hadn't maintained my body well enough and that I was developing a little bit of a stomach.
Apparently I was too prudish in sexual fetishes. He liked being called "daddy" (please allow me to vomit profusely as I rehash these memories) and I would constantly tell him it was gross, so I changed that as well. I thought camwhoring was degenerate, while he thought it was "special" and "hot". Ergo, it was my fault that he cheated because I wasn't keeping up with the demands, so to speak. :-) He even had the gaul to say "it wasn't cheating, it was just normal behaviour in reaction to my own"
>>25543298 What will? I'm not going to be angry. I'm just going to say that I'm aware she has a reputation for leading guys on she doesn't actually feel anything for, and ask her how she honestly feels about me. I'm not here to morally crucify her, she's hurting enough.
My ex had BPD, she never cheated or anything but I had to constantly reassure her that I cared about her and that she wasn't a piece of shit like she though she was. We dated for 6 months and I would have to spend every moment of my time with her or she'd go crazy and think that I hated her and didn't want to talk to her anymore. We only got in one arguement and when we did I saw the mistake I'd made as she told me she didn't care about me and physically hurt herself. We made up but I started distancing myself and broke up with her a week later, when I did that she did the same thing but worse said she never loved me, considered leaving me, hurt herself, ect but I just cut contact. It was a very exhausting experience and sometimes I do miss her but I enjoy my time along amd being able to see my friends, or go to a resteraunt without her freaking out. She would get jealous of any female servet I would have because they were apparently "flirting with me". If you're going to date someone like that the only advice I can give you is to be careful and when you do leave them make sure you do it when they are stable.
>>25543356 She will take the defensive if you point out her flaws. Narcissism runs really deep in borderlines, they pretty much want you to think they are perfect. If you break the narrative and accuse her of having a "history" be prepared to feel like shit afterwards.
I'll greentext my own experience with this.
>exbf has a history of leading girls on and playing hot/cold >in the middle of our relationship, feeling kind of insecure because he is starting to do the same to me (in retrospect he was cucking me hard at this moment) >it is my birthday >we watch my favourite movie, it is about a guy that gets cheated on >i cry because i feel for him >i say "mysterysbf, i know... you have a history of not being the greatest gu-" >he responds "WHAT DO YOU MEAN??? GOD YOU'RE SUCH A PARANOID BITCH *yelling that i tuned out* YOU'RE FUCKING CRAZY I'M PERFECT I'M SUCH A GOOD GUY YOU'RE SHIT" >sleeps on the couch >cry myself to sleep >on my fucking birthday >6 months later i find out he was actually cucking me
>>25543381 >>25543427 I don't know what to do. They asked for space, and I'm giving it to them, but I recently found out they have a history of camwhoring and leading on guys, and I really want to know if I'm also being tricked, and that she doesn't care about me, because I do really care about them and want to help them. So I was going to wait until the weekend, and if they haven't reinitiated contaxt with me I was going to mention that I recently discovered she has a reputation, that I want to know how she really feels, and that I'm still willing to help her if she wasn't joking about really liking me. But now I don't know if that's just foing to make her resent me more.
>>25543382 It's whatever. I'm pretty much very well over it by now. I think it contributes to one of the reasons I'm so quick to DROP people now. The second I see a similar symptom, I run in the opposite direction. Ain't getting involved in that shit anymore.
I'm considered lucky. I broke free. I'm not sure how I did it. The entire premise is that you become a cuck for life. Maybe it is because I was so young when I was targeted, that maybe I wasn't mentally developed enough so it was easy for me to restart my life. Other people I know have had their lives destroyed by BPD people. I know one guy that would probably still go back to his ex in a heartbeat.
>>25543649 m8 just don't do it. It isn't worth it. It's better to be alone than to be with a borderline. You can never win.
Five or more of the following and you have BPD 1. frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. 2. a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterised by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation. 3. identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self. 4. impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g. spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating). This does not include suicidal or self-harming behaviour. 5. recurrent suicidal behaviour, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behaviour. 6. affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood - intense feelings that can last from a few hours to a few days. 7. chronic feelings of emptiness. 8. inappropriate intense anger or difficulty controlling anger. 9. transient, stress-related paranoid ideas or severe dissociative symptoms.
>>25543958 Met them on OKCupid because they mentioned r9k in their profile. 3 days after a failed suicide attempt on my part (unrelated to her) we met in person and it was one of the happiest days of my life desu. You've heard this story before maybe, or has something similar happened to you?
>>25544083 Pretty much the same thing happened to me. Met a girl from r9k who told me she liked me but still kept fucking other guys anyway. I distanced myself before I developed any real feelings because it was too painful to endure. She tried to convince me that it was normal to fuck other people and that her feelings for me were real even though she talked to dozens of other guys on a daily basis and was just as flirty with all of them.
I'll never understand why they do this. Even if you're addicted to attention, what does it mean coming from random people you don't care about?
>>25544405 I honestly regret leaving her. She was great when she was normal, I'm still not iver he and it's been probably 9 months. I got back in contact with her a couple months ago but she has a new boyfriend and moved on. I tried to be friends with her too but it just made me sick thinking about him with her.
>>25544634 We're on r9k, none of our social behavior is healthy, being beaten by my parents and having attachment issues is unhealthy, being so ungodly lonely in unhealthy, no matter what we're fucked, at least this way I have the chance to make aomeone else's life a little less miserable.
>>25544699 Nothing hardens your soul like being with a borderline.
You're no longer the person you once were, you're nothing but a shell filled with a borderline's thoughts, preferences, tastes. You might as well consider yourself dead. You've given yourself away completely.
I know you have vaseline over the lens, but I hope you escape one day.
>>25544926 >>25545032 The chances of a person having any particular letter in their name are really high and there are A LOT of whores in the world. Don't get paranoid and do something you'll regret. If your girlfriend really cares about you you'll end up staying together no matter what happens, if she doesn't it'll be over soon enough.
Hm, interesting reading all these different experiences with BPD, mostly the same though since they all amount to it just being pure shit. I was diagnosed with it a couple of years ago, and while I can relate to alot of the behaviour and symptoms described here, I've had to put ALOT of work and effort into sorting through my own bullshit. I felt motivated to change after a serious love interest expressed he wouldn't stay with me unless I changed. So I started seeing a new psychologist, talking out my issues and we had a happy healthy relationship for over 3 years. Fast forward to now, relationship has been over for 6 months after he decided to pursue a career in another country for an indefinite amount of time, and BPD like behaviour is back again. I'm beginning to fall for someone new, and despite how well things are progressing, I dont know whether or not I am emotionally stable enough to even pursue a relationship with him.
>>25542637 >so YOU end up apologizing for being cucked and forgiving your cucker >apologizing for being cucked Do people really sink this low? How can you have literally no backbone? Jesus christ /r9k/
>>25546274 You sound bitter anon. Idealized, perfect love doesn't exist, but imperfect love is real, genuine caring about a person is real, and just because they're going through hell right now doesn't mean I'm going to care about them any less or support them any less, anyway, life is a lot easier when you have someone you can rely on to be there for you, something most robots lack.
borderlines crave genuine love in a world that has injured them by keeping them from experiencing any consistent nurturing that would lead to the development of self-worth or proper relationship abilities
borderline is basically co-morbid with having been abused
>>25540387 I used to see someone diagnosed with bpd, I think it's caused (if not caused, then at least helped along somewhat) by a traumatic/abusive childhood. It's sad. That said, my few experiences with people with the disorder have been uhh.. Not fun.
>>25546590 >therapy You have to pay some doctor's mortgage to be considered normal? Unacceptable. No, seems like borderline is just a realistic way of looking at things and your loving background is a lie to keep everybody comfortable. You can keep it.
>>25540465 This too. I don't have BPD but I think it's messed up that every book on the subject (that I've seen at least) is about "how to deal with your abusive BPD s/o" and not how to deal with the illness itself. I couldn't imagine that it's easy for people with BPD to be told that they are abusive, manipulative monsters all the time
>In gay relationship with girl with BPD >Worst hell imaginable >Goes awol for weeks, won't answer phone >Comes back with presents and apologies >Impossible to leave relationship without her lashing out and making me feel like shit
>>25546838 nah, he had all the signs of a borderline >bought things compulsively, literally would never stop buying shit, i still find shit all over my apartment that i have to throw out >had lots of friends but still claimed to be an introvert >sexually promiscuous
>>25546876 read the fucking thread, read any thread where people talk about their experiences with people with BPD. you sound maybe butthurt because perhaps you're diagnosed yourself? all bpd people sound the fucking same because they are the fucking same.
i have bpd and i've looked up ways to deal with it because i'm sick of hurting my bf and causing fights and worrying and feeling like shit i don't know why everyone here says bpd are cheaters though, i'd never intentionally hurt my bf like that, i honestly just want to make him happy but i'm overly codependet, i would never ever cheat, it's disgusting i really just want to get better and stop my behavior but there are like no articles on it, only ways for loved ones to cope with it as if borderlines aren't real people or something??
>>25542308 I have BPD. it's easier to deal with now that I know that "she teased me slightly so she's a monster bitch and i should kill myself to spite her" feeling is something I should dismiss immediately
I think I'm slowly growing out of it but I already inflicted a lot of damage on others because of it, just heaping verbal abuse on girlfriends/fucks in a desperate attempt to force them to stay at my side, while really giving them nothing in return.
the social stigma is almost just is bad, some girl i knew for years and thought i was cool with just literally quit talking to me when i asked if she was even familiar with it.
I went from a crying self-injuring self-destructive wreck to someone in a healthy fulfilling relationship just by knowing I had bpd. After being diagnosed when things got tough all I had to do was literally be aware that my emotions were stronger than what normal people would experience and I adjusted my behaviour accordingly.
>>25547156 sociopath is such a faulty diagnosis, borderlines are literally sociopaths.
i don't fit any of the borderline symptoms except for mood disturbances, which is not enough to diagnose anyone with bpd. bipolar disorder, maybe, but highly unlikely. i have a naturally depressive character that is exaggerated when i consume depressants like alcohol. but mood disturbances are present in many mental illnesses. not only that, but my mood disturbances usually result in me being unusually depressive, but i never withdraw/push people away/cuck people.
so far your symptoms are: -mood disturbance -seeking attention -self-destructive behaviour such as browsing a misogynistic board, consuming depressants, dating someone abusive -stormy relationships -self-victimization -black and white thinking
>>25543335 How the fuck does a mentally broken fat guy get multiple thin women? I'm not trying to invalidate your experience, it sounds fucking terrible, but as a fat guy who feels he doesn't deserve love, affection, physical contact etc, it honestly astounds me how a fat fuck can have that.
What was his personality like for people, yourself even, to give him the time of day in the first place? I mean, anywhere outside of a Laotian Proffesional Woman Hating Discussion board you're not going to be seen as ugly by any stretch of the imagination and I'm assuming the camwhores, by virtue of being camwhores, wernt exactly toothless meth addicts.
I guess you could argue mental vulnerability but if two were anorexic why the fuck would they go near a guy of BMI 40, what with their image issues about fat etc.
would you guys ever consider getting back together with someone after they cheated on you if they had bpd? My ex that has it asked me if she would consider dating again after a few years of treatment, which is obviously kind of silly, but i have 0 friends in real life and dont think i can get another gf anyway
>>25547377 i don't have black and white thinking and i don't have stormy relationships. i had one shitty relationship with a borderline. my relationship with both my parents and my extended family are perfectly healthy.
i do not self-victimize. kek.
>destructive behaviour /r9k/ isn't that misogynistic and makes me far less mad than reddit/tumblr, i can't even browse reddit for more than 5 minutes w/o getting aggravated, so i don't
>consuming depressants i don't want to be rude and not drink with my parents over the holidays, or sometimes i want to lower my anxiety in social settings, not destructive in the slightest.
>dating someone abusive literally kill yourself. it was the biggest mistake that i wish i could take back but never will.
>>25542049 >>25543920 I used to date a tumblr goth chick like this. She told me I either had to say that fat people are fine the way they are or that anyone can lose weight. I picked my pride over her.
>>25547259 >victim complex becus ex bf >somewhat of an extrovert (tripfagging on r9k, probably attends conversations with robots) >"i never withdraw/push people away", but quite a few people claim that you do this
>>25540918 This. BPD is one of the worst mental illnesses you can have. People hate them, and being hated is one of the worst feels for people with BPD. rosemarker's post is very relatable. it's kind of comforting seeing someone else feel that way as well.
No. Once someone cheats the power dynamic of the relationship is forever altered. You will always be paranoid or afraid that they will cheat. They will always know that you took them back after they cheated. There is no need for her to respect your boundaries. It is likely that you will continually forgive her.
>>25547392 borderlines appear to be really perfect at first. idk how to explain it.
you like a certain book? it's now their favourite book. you like a certain band? cool, they do too! you have a certain hobby? they're an expert in it.
they're charming, very well socialized, they'll make you feel very comfortable in the relationship and usually do all the work.
they'll target insecure people. my ex targeted young girls (13-16) and zoe quinn (his fucking female counterpart, kek) targetted 30 year old loser unemployed nerds.
anorexic teenagers are incredibly easy to manipulate. it isn't surprising. m8 you could have it too, if you woke up one day and decided to become the scum of the earth and start manipulating people, you could do the same. you'd have to sell your soul and get rid of your conscious first.
also, numbers. i saw his tumblr askbox one time and he had over 1,000 messages. fucking borderlines m8
>>25547392 >How the fuck does a mentally broken fat guy get multiple thin women? I'm not trying to invalidate your experience, it sounds fucking terrible, but as a fat guy who feels he doesn't deserve love, affection, physical contact etc, it honestly astounds me how a fat fuck can have that.
It's easy to get a girl to like you. You seems like a great guy because you're extremely attentive, humble, and eager to please. The downside is, however, that in the end it's all self serving. the fact that you can't even tell when you're being a manipulative cunt only furthers the whole lack of a clear self identity.
>>25547528 i don't have a victim complex about my ex bf. i've said over 100 times it's my fault and i was too blame. i still feel like an idiot and if anything i like warning other people so they don't end up getting into the same shit that i did.
>extrovert /r9k/ is my primary source of social interaction but good job m8y
>quite a few people claim that you do this i don't talk to sexually predatory people on the internet, which most robots are, so i push them away because fuck that noise
i'm done arguing about this with a bunch of borderlines who are offended at my depiction of them lmao
>>25547547 youre right, I think im just looking for excuses to take her back since shes been asking. It just seems so comforting compared to being completely alone. I just dont want to deal with those feelings or get hurt again
this is honestly sad, you've internalized misogyny and you're blaming yourself for being a victim of a sociopath.
The saddest part is if you were able to see yourself as a borderline you'd stop stigmatizing them and causing so much harm but your mind is too warped from abuse and you're too hateful. Hope you get your shit together someday. Sincerely.
>>25547033 This is what literally all girls with borderline personality think. Then they get caught up in the moment when their emotions take over and they devalue their boyfriend and BAM. They're cheating without once ever having consciously thought about it.
>>25543056 I have BPD, and I'm not fat. >>25544649 So a large amount of people, from both genders, are behaving in the same way? Wanting attention really badly. Why, if they are all acting in this similar way that separates them from most people, isn't that actually a mental issue? A disorder. >>25546815 Please stop. Please please. Some of us that have BPD aren't too terrible. The girls that have called me manipulative were manipulative little cunts themselves. Its bullshit. And I see a therapist. >>25547286 Because you're being a cunt. >>25547033 Same here. I honestly just want to get better, I fucking swear.
>>25547675 >i don't have a victim complex about my ex bf. i've said over 100 times it's my fault and i was too blame. i still feel like an idiot and if anything i like warning other people so they don't end up getting into the same shit that i did.
"oh poor girl! youre not an idiot!"
>i don't talk to sexually predatory people on the internet, which most robots are, so i push them away because fuck that noise
>i'm done arguing about this with a bunch of borderlines who are offended at my depiction of them lmao
"everyone disagreeing with me, with cruel intention or not, is 100% beyond a shadow of a doubt wrong. I guess i'll just completely abandon the line of thought because it troubles me."
>>25547741 >you've internalized misogyny I've also internalized misandry
>you're blaming yourself for being a victim of a sociopath Not really, I had many opportunities to stop. Things aren't always clearcut. I still feel guilty about not leaving sooner. It's how I know he wasn't ASPD, because he was very upset and emotionally distraught when I started withdrawing. He was always very internally hateful and relied on me to make him feel better.
>>25547730 No, you're entirely mischaracterizing BPD. Stop that. NPD is like BPD except with a superiority complex that was developed as a defense mechanism. They literally think they're better than other people and therefore have almost no empathy. Borderlines aren't as cold and calculating and selfish.
nope, that's sociopaths. do 3 seconds of research. honestly can't believe you're arguing this while being so heavily uneducated but at the same time borderlines tend to make feeling-based arguments as opposed to fact-based statements
Try what >>25547222 said, it can help. But you'll always make your boyfriend miserable, I'm sorry to say. BPD is not a meme disorder. It is literally brain damage -- it's a physical brain disorganization wherein the limbic system can run free because the frontal cortex can't stop it. It's often a result of childhood PTSD (abuse, sexual abuse, etc). Sorry.
>>25547983 A therapist has dx'd me with pstd in the past, but i don't go to him anymore because the commute was too long. I'm working through things with another therapist but idk, mang. It doesn't really matter because every day seems to get better and i'm basically a different person compared to 2013
>>25548246 i guess maybe. i know one girl who has bpd who i used to play online games with. i dont talk to her anymore but she was literally CRAZY before. ever since she started admitting to herself she has bpd, it's been a couple years and she's been relatively normal. still hasn't really seen a therapist but every year i wait for her to implode and so far she hasn't.
but it's also an environmental thing. borderlines surround themselves with yes-men that enable that sort of behaviour. most people with cluster b personalities tend to do this. the only real way to break free of that is to surround yourself by people who won't take your shit.
You are an empty vessel, a void aching to be filled. Nothing can fill it, so you fill it with the essence, as you see it, of others. Boredom and frustration sets in, and you proceed to destroy that person as an effigy of yourself.
>>25548310 Because I felt like I was bothering them more than ever, I felt really bad about that too. However, I cut off the people I knew a long time ago, back in high school, and I haven't met anybody since then. There's no return for me.
>>25548322 >Sound familiar? Yes. That sounds very familiar.
>>25548314 i had really bad kidney problems when i was younger, landed in the hospital a few times. pain like no other. holy shit m8. i would get recurring infections and it was honestly nightmare-mode.
one week i literally laid in bed for a week str8 because i was in so much pain. i would only get up to pee in a bucket/etc. i don't have them anymore. i think i sort of can guess why i did, although idk.
later along the line due to stress i've just had poor health in general but whatever
>>25548528 like two years ago on here there was a thread that said 'bravest way to an hero'. then someone with mystery.jpg trip but it might have been different code said 'my dad hung himself which is a pretty courageous way to kill self' or something to that extent.
>Be me >I was a 15 year old a the time >Had a undiagnosed thyroid problem (which is now well under control) >Body looked weird as fuck >Awful at talking to girls due to rejection. Never had one of those "childhood girlfriends" >Halfway through my highschool freshman year, this cute redhead chick transfers into the school >She is mad cute. Way out of my league. Some teacher actually remark that she should be a model or something (she was very short though, just had this amazingly cute face) >I was the weird fat and hairy kid >For some crazy ass reason she attaches herself to me >I had never even had a female friend, let alone a girl who wanted to spend so much time with me >She starts to come to my house and even do cute shit like cook me things >I fall for her like a huge dumbass even though is way too cute for a guy like me >People at school start to talk about us >Girls literally laugh at mere possibily of us dating >One day the girl calls me to a room >I get there and she's making out with some older handsome dude from another year >They make out more, and then she looks at me dead in the face and says, "Oh that's it!" and leaves the room >I feel like a complete piece of shit >I cut contact with her ASAP but I still see her at class every day >For the next week she makes a point out of hooking up with different guys every time I see her >Eventually one day she calls me like, 8 times >I figure she'll probably be having sex on the other side of the line or something and don't answer >She sents me a bunch of texts begging me to pick up the phone >I give in and do it >SHe's sobbing like crazy >Tells me she has PBD and she knew I liked her "thought I was too good for her, so she wanted to push me away" >Right about now my thoughts changed from suicide to homicide >I lash out >"Why the fuck didn't you just talk to me about it, do you know how hurt I am" etc >"Anon, you have to understand, I just wanted to push you away"
>>25538503 >be me, 17 >get dragged to psychobloke's by mum >apparently I have BPD >avoid everybody's attempts to "cure" me >4years later >acknowledge things are bad and start going to therapy >mfw the therapist tells me I am literally insane atm >offers me anti-psychotics Should I accept the offer anons? Will the pills make the shit go away?
>>25548670 >"Why the fuck would you want to push me away" >"Because I'm ashamed of being seen in public with you, but my illness made me want to spend time with you anyway" >... >I hang up >She calls me a bunch of times >I don't pick up >She sends me a bunch of texts >I delete all of them without reading >I tell my mom and father the gist of what happened (They had met her and really liked her since she was always in our home after the school) >They're mighty pissed. >I tell them I just want to transfer schools >I do so >We never talked again >She treid friending me on Facebook last year >4 Times >I rejected all 4
She destroyed what little self esteem I had, and any and all trust in women I could have. It's been nearly a decade and I still can't talk to a woman without feeling like she wants to away from me.
It's literally brain damage - it's not like you can fall on your head and be given a pill to fix it.
They may offer you a combination of anti-psychotics like seroquel and SSRIs. It is absolutely worth trying, but doesn't work for everyone. Buying a DBT workbook off Amazon and doing exercises every day is about the most helpful thing you can do.
>>25549119 I am just interested, are you also a sociopathic ladykiller like the people descibed in this thread, or are you, like me, a bloke with unstable emotions and moods and identity issues, but still robot?
>>25549157 I reckon the latter, but I'm not a bloke. I like attention as much as any other borderline but I have no interest in trying to charm other people because I don't see the point. I wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship with them anyway, friendship or otherwise.
What about men with BPD? I do a lot of drugs because I feel this constant boredom and emptiness. My relationships were all really unstable and crazy, mostly because of me. My last gf actually had borderline too but she was able to handle it much better than me. I miss her a lot, she was the only one who understood me. I fucked up really bad and think about it all the time.
>>25549401 Yeah, I was raped as a kid a few times and had an alcoholic dad. I just couldn't connect with other people. I was too afraid of people getting close because I knew I could hurt them, but I was also really lonely.
I've always seen BPD as an overactive emotional immune system. Or like hemophilia. So if anything went wrong in a relationship I would completely freak out because I thought the other person was trying to hurt me on purpose like other people had in the past.
I have avoidant personality disorder. I know that people with AvPD have unusually low self-esteem, but I think that I have a fairly objective view of myself. I would be lying to myself if I had anything positive to say about myself.
The truth is that you have to be muscular and outgoing to get a girlfriend. If you're shy and/or average looking, then it's almost impossible for any girl to like you. I'm 21 and have decided to give up before even trying. A kissless 21 year old like me is probably beyond help.
My first serious gf had bpd. She simultaneously gave me the best and worst moments of my life. She never cheated on me as far as I k ow since we Hun out pretty much 24/7 plus she was very shy. I came to the conclusion that if she didn't have bpd as she claimed she didn't, she was literally an evil, evil person.
Her manipulation and verbal abuse was so severe that dating her for a year and a half gave me autism PTSD and Tourette's. The worst thing is she usually split when we got stoned so I can't smoke weed without getting horrible guilt trips and panic attack seven now two years after breaking up with her.
>>25550814 ehh all undiagnosed of course. And I probably had all of those things already but she unleashed them like a horrible horrible acid trip.
Her constant abuse and attacking of my character leads me to be much more anxious in social situations. Being "myself" has led me to experience incredible pain so I have tried to dull any sort of personality I have to be as vanilla as possible. This forced personality requires a lot of thought and so I constantly overthink everything I say mid conversation, causing me to fuck up and say stupid shit or miss words or mumble nonsense.
Everything is much more objective, I used to staunchly believe in God, and my emotions are all fucked up. I managed to bag another girlfirend after her who was legitimately a 10/10 physically and was amazingly not crazy and after over a year of dating her I still feel unable to tell her I love her. I overthink humor now and make people sincerely laugh maybe 2-3 times a month.
I get horribly guilty and anxious often over nothing but these pangs of guilt are so severe that I experience these verbal tics where I either grunt, mumble, or mutter the phrase "kill me" under my breath.
So yeah not diagnosed but she definitely fucked my shit up big time. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for her.
>>25547623 >anorexic teenagers are incredibly easy to manipulate. it isn't surprising. m8 you could have it too, if you woke up one day and decided to become the scum of the earth and start manipulating people, you could do the same. you'd have to sell your soul and get rid of your conscious first. >also, numbers. i saw his tumblr askbox one time and he had over 1,000 messages. fucking borderlines m8 What if you manipulated them but didn't shit on them? Seems the best of both worlds brb looking for a BPD to teach me his ways so I can use them for good.
Fucking kill yourself mystery. I would love to open fire into your belly with an AK 47 on full auto, splattering your shredded intestines onto the wall behind you making sure I don't hit any vitals so that your death is slow. Then I break out your teeth with a hammer and face fuck you until you bleed out.
Could not give less of a shit Mystery, I'm too busy wanking to imagining holding you and your boyfriend at gunpoint and forcing you cut each other with exactoknives before getting bored and blowing your brains out anyway.
>>25538503 but i still loved her, no actually i love her even right now, and she even told me one guy who she cheated her exbf with made her squirt, and i still love her. wtf is wrong with me, just kill me now please
>>25553563 fucking shit i need to move on, she wasnt even so hot, i still remember every defect she had physically and psychologically. Yet i still love her, even knowing we could never be togheter. Im an educated person who thinks about things like cause and effect and even knowing this is poison to my soul i cant do shit? How can it be not my fault.
>>25553846 >How can it be not my fault. just research BDP a little and you will see. this same thing happens to literally every guy. it doesn't mean you are dumb or anything like that. bpd girls are literally like a drug, and you are an addict. you feel addicted to her. it's also impossible to have a relationship with them, no matter what you do, so you did not fuck up in that regard either
>>25553915 i will look this up, i do still think its my fault to not being able to cut the bridges, or at least trying to get busy with someone else, even if i dont even have much interests for other females. so bpd girls can aggravate an already present form of ONEITIS?
>>25554270 >ONEITIS I really fucking hate that word/meme. >hurf durf monogamy is a disease It pisses me right the fuck off, why parrot this shit concept? First time I heard it some fuckass canadian comedian was saying he didn't want to get trapped with one woman, people who shit on marriage deserve being the loneliest saddest fucks in the old folks home.
>>25543920 Fuck you and your armchair diagnosis I don't have this shit I don't want this shit and you can't tell me I have it. I don't believe your tumblr shit you got from WebMD. This just seems like some garbage since everyone has some of these
I'm in the process of breaking up with someone like this. It sucks. The worst part so far for me is your partner breaking up with you, and then begging for you back later. I can handle my composure during text messages, but in person I can't hold my spaghetti, so it is tough.
>>25544329 >extremely emotionally reactive >incredibly loving >they'll always come back to you >they become paranoid >if you can calm them and reassure them they'll be like warm butter melting under your palm
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