>tfw highly intelligent
It's a blessing and a curse. Everything from mathematics to body control comes naturally and fluently, but it's impossible to relate to 90% of the population and their trivialities. And it's nigh worthless if you lack the motivation to actually use it for something good.
What's the most impressive thing you've done with your mental capacities?
Everyone always says I'm smart, but I never feel smart. I've always been a bit paranoid about that, to be honest. I think people hate me for being good at mathematics. Yeah, I can do mathematics exceptionally well and have earned a degree in it, but I still don't believe that people cannot do math. I think they just choose not to, and they just patronize me for being an autistic shit bag.
I wish I still saw mathematics as beautiful. Now all I see is a waste of time and something that will only make me lonelier and lonelier. I hate myself. I wish I was good at literally anything else.
Smartest thing i did was brag about my intelligence to my autistic friends on 4chan :^)
Just so you know, I feel exactly the same way about the thing I've chosen to pursue, which is literature. Everyday I feel I've made a mistake and should have studied something more practical like Mathematics. But hearing the same sort of story from your end is sort of reassuring in a sense.
You didn't make a mistake, its just the nature of our discontinuous existence
and at least people respect you for what you know. It could be a lot worse.
If you want something better, suicide is the obvious choice. Or just maintain the monotony. Doesn't really matter. but being good at something else wouldn't help. Though dreaming about it might.
I'm not smart at all, often times I wonder why I do stupid shit and don't correct it
But, I do occasionally have these thoughts about people not looking into the details of things, but its not just exactly that and its harder to explain
I keep calling myself "awake" and whenever people start doing beyond stupid shit I call them not awake, not because of any sort of le euphoria meme but because that's the best description for this odd thing I'm feeling
>mathematics is totally out of my reach
>things like languages, literature, philosophy, etc, come naturally
>don't even know what 6x6 is
>can speak 3 unrelated languages fluently