Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 9883. page

I lost mine at 20
All is not lost brother, although it only gets harder the older you get

>>34813548
Is trying even worth it?

25 is the official cutoff point for fucking up.
Up till then there's wiggle room to figure your shit out. Virgin, unemployed, no life direction, whatever it's all cool until you're 25.
Once you hit that magical number people have zero tolerance for you not having your shit together. What was once kind of an amusing conversation to have about life direction turns to unpleasant interrogations about what the fuck you're going to do with your life.
Friends, family, coworkers, what was once basically just idle chatter now turns to actual concern.
Even pre-25 most girls will tolerate a virgin. (though you should never volunteer this information)
Once you hit 25 it is a deal breaker full stop.

>>34813518
play video games on twitch
or something like that
your "friend" lst her job in a dumb way I bet

She can play video games on twitch, maybe.

If she is able to up her appearance, it'll be easier for her to either find a job or find a boyfriend with money.

She can try looking for a job in another town.

>>34813547
Oh i was talking about that with her yesterday. She said she doesn't like videogames and i told her that's the point, coz guys will her to see her play i guess

My friend lost her job coz she got sick for 1 week at the important time :(

>>34813565
She has appearance, but she only finish her highschool. It's hard to find work if you not finish the college. She prefer working nearby.
She does'nt want chad btw, at least that's what she told me.

Is there other way guys?

>>34813513

Thx for terminating your stay here with such a quality thread, see you tomorrow.

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>>34813513
I don't believe you, OP. You will always come back to this place

Begone the robot has no need of your kind. .. The robot has existed long before time and maintains even so past. .

Nobody ever believes me when I say this but whatever: I used to live with my mother in an apartment in Arizona. One day when I was 14, my mom said she'd be coming home late the next day, just to let me know. So I was cool with this, happened all the time, she was a teacher and I think she probably had to have a meeting with a student's parents or whatever.
So I came home from school that day and the apartment was empty, I was home alone. I made dinner for myself and left some for my mother. Watched some TV, sat around in comfy clothes, everything was alright. Then someone calls the house phone. Unknown number (yeah, it's one of those stories. stick with me, here). I reject it and immediately get a call like 5 seconds later. I rejected the call like 3 times before picking it up. Some guy on the other end was talking through a voice-masking thing and literally all he did was describe everything I was doing with absolute detail. "You're wearing sweatpants. You're sitting on a brown carpet in front of a Daewoo television set. You just made baked chicken with macaroni & cheese and...is that spinach? Blah blah blah..." Scared the fuck out of me.

(1/?)

>>34813642
(2/2)
So I go, "Who is this? This isn't funny," and start closing every blind in the house. He just laughed and said, "Yeah, don't even bother. It won't help. I can still see you."
So I called the police, they literally never came. Waited 45 minutes, called again. "We'll send someone out." Nothing.
Unknown number calls me again, literally just continues where he left off, describing everything I do as I do it. "Stop twirling the cord in your fingers. It's turning me on. Why are you crying? Hey, you might want to --" and then I heard giggling right before he hung up.
My mom didn't come home until 6:45 AM the NEXT GODDAMNED DAY and the police NEVER showed up, or even went anywhere near the complex. When she came home I hadn't slept and was crying hysterically and she was just sitting there with a blank, confused face, like, "Why are you crying? What's wrong?" I explained the whole thing to her and she rushed to the phone, pressed a few buttons, and said, "It doesn't look like anyone called at all yesterday." Eventually I asked her where she was and she straight-up wouldn't answer me. Refused to answer. She didn't say, "None of your business," or anything, instead she literally just did not respond to the question. She responded to everything else but went dead silent whenever I asked her where she was and why she's only just now coming home.
She made waffles and acted like nothing out of the ordinary happened. Even now, she acts like she has no recollection of the whole ordeal. I dunno, maybe I had a psychotic break and hallucinated the whole thing, just went crazy alone in my apartment, but I sure as hell didn't dream it.
I'm still fucked up over that.

>>34813696
Dude what the fuck?!!?!?
Your life is a creepy pasta

Too bad i have a girlfriend and anything you said is false.
Not all females are the same, try again

>>34813487
Keep telling yourself this anon

I certainly do

>sex is never as good as you imagine
That is true but cuddling with your gf is even better than you imagine.

>>34813469
>he'll let child's play ruin his life

>ask her out
>she says "yes"
>tell everyone I know
>a couple of glorious days pass
>"you know I was just kidding, right?"
Cunts, the lot of them.

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>>34813469
>get gf
>first serious gf in my life so i'm trying not to fuck it up
>talking with her and some of her friends one day
>actuallybeingsocial.wav
>go home from school feeling good
>go in next day with everyone making fun of me saying I called her a princess when i never did IIRC
>she breaks up with me a day later and doesn't say why
>I know it's because of that rumour
>everyone made me feel like i fucked it up
to this day i've been pretty much unable to ask a girl out for fear of something like this happenign again, sorry for bitching about something as trivial as a highschool relationship but i feel like it did genuinely affect me.

>>34813366
Beta=engineer it

isn't a 2 inch girth really thick?

Have I finally lost it?

The downside is the cost of course
Aint nobody got money for that

>>34813364
Find someone with BPD

>>34813364
>27 chubby guy
>no job or career
>Barely have the stamian to keep up my hygiene
>don't like cleaning
>Need help with all kinds of paperwork
>bad posture, bad back, bad knees, bad poverall health, irritable bowel syndrome
>Accidentally knock things down and walk and bump into furnitures, breaking them
>No desire to do anything in life other than watch anime and not work
>So lonely he anally masturbates regualrry just to takew the edge off because he is so sick and tired of his hand
>Can't stomach alcohol and does not want to do drugs
>Never wants children of his own
>anxious about anything social
>greasy food diet

This cluimsy and mess enough for you, or are you really thinking a cute animu will suddenly appear in your life?

>>34813364
iktf anon
all i want is a gf who needs me to take care of her.
rip being a daddy

Undisputed best prank called

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QBJaTtF7XI

bumping cause this call is awesome

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>>34813375

that sucks

get on mark knopfler's level

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8teY54fMsxY

Wow you're so much of an idiot that you're letting the size of your wrists dictate your life. Holy shit. You deserve no more replies than this one.

Do pushups until exhaustion every day.

Get somebody to cut off your arms.

>>34813332
feel u bruv
i was just browsing fb trying to find some place to go out this week feeling all good (watched madoka movie 3 today) and then i see my crush commenting to chad "mmmm i miss you we need to talk"

I'm still on the up and up. Im tring to find a way to kill myself before I sober up

>>34813332
do a lot of speed and stay up, keep doing speed, until you overdose and die

that's my plan atleast

>>34813274
get ahold of yourself fucking loser

night
i'll make sure i dutch oven myself every time i fart

What the fuck is happening in pornography
That's a Brazzers bitch? Really?
They used to be extremely attractive, or was I wrong?

Just beeee urself man
Original oregano spaghetti

might have been salvageable if not for your height, sorry lad, you're a complete write-off

Kys you sound ugly as fuck

>>34813253
I don't care what she says as long as she sticks by me and opens up her legs frequently. Gossip all you want I literally do not care if i am getting some.

>>34813253

>sweater sewn with boob slots

this is why i hate roasties.

this is why you date a fembot
>no friends to make fun of you to
>no sexual experience to compare you to

>>34813245
What's the big deal about going to prom alone? Just hang out with the other losers.

t. my private Christian school didn't have prom

i'm sorry, at least i wasn't forced to go to prom

man that'd be rough.

although i'll give you this, i'd be first on the list if they ever made euthanasia legal. i don't want to live anymore but i deserve a humane and pain free death goddamnit. i have fucking rights.

>>34813245
Just don't go. It's better than going with nobody.