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Any follow up to this?
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>>34907755
The original greentexts
>>
bump
fuck this mute bullshit
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Holy fuck, I found the first one a while ago on/b/ and couldn't find anything else on it. Love this type of stuff, bumping for follow up and similar.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEwSfbE9IXc
wow, not original
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>>34907733
>double dubs
Nice
But put that nigger shit away
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>>34907760
remove your faggotry from my thread
>>
R8 my music bots,
>Kendrick Lamar
>Childish Gambino
>Yung Lean
>Tycho
>Boards of Canada
>RUFUS
>BLANK BANSHEE
>Atronach's Aura
>Madonna (old stuff)
Anonymous
TLDR What's the most painless method of suicide? 2017-02-16 09:01:26 Post No.34907710
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TLDR What's the most painless method of suicide? 2017-02-16 09:01:26 Post No.34907710
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TLDR What's the most painless method of suicide?
Anonymous
2017-02-16 09:01:26
Post No. 34907710
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>watching some random porn video at 4 am
>depressed as fuck
>dick don't work its broke, even semi hard only 2.5-3 inches pathetic
>girl is stroking his dick
>its literally like 8-9 inches
>mmmm so big :)
>she literally deepthroats his massive dick
>"bigger than all the other boys I've fucked"
>she literally gets fucked by this dude for like 30 minutes straight while screaming in pleasure "its soo big" and she orgasms like 5 times
>I stare at my own 2 inch flaccid, my fat useless virgin corpse of a body, and realize I'll never be fucking happy in my entire life
>turn off the porn, delete history, go to bed and start crying for like 20 minutes about how cucked my life is
Who watch porn and it made you depressed here?
I'm just so sick of my pathetic beta/omega cuck life. Small penis, fat, ginger fucking weeb aspergers fucking loser.
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>>34907710
Don't watch porn that demoralizes you then you idiot
Masturbation, hiddencam, and solo exhibitionism are the future
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>>34907710
Dude
>quit that type of porn
>don't focus on something you can never improve like your dick
>go to gym if you're bothered by your weight, go for a walk or get a cheap bike
>stop watching anime if it bothers you, there's so many shows on
>being beta is an illusion
>you're a beta if you believe you are
>after physicality there's only psychology
>expose yourself to people slowly
>take part in group exercises
>role play conversations
>you can do it
>I believe in you
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>>34907710
i can't fap to porn that features a male face
or a male body with tattoos
or a male voice
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Alright /r9k/ I am a smoker I am only 20 years old, there is a girl I like and she fucking hates it, I already told her I liked her and she said I was a great guy.
Also she hates smoking
Well before I decide to fucking bail out on this relationship like the little bitch I am, I am going to see if this helps and even then she is such a nice person it doesnt even matter if she doesnt want to date me.
So this is it I am going to quit smoking start lifting.
So things I will do to achieve my goals
>Write a diary it should be funny to see all the autistic shit I would have written over the month of trying to quit smoking
>Exercise in the morning, I got a cross trainer and weights fucking use them
>Talk to people, get people to help you out
>Make a photoshop that is anti smoking so you can see it everyday as a desktop wallpaper
I want to be the chad she deserves.
I told her I am going to quit smoking and she replied with a "please do"
I can do it I can be the chad that she doesnt want but the chad that she needs
Wish me luck robots also help me find images for a photoshop should be fun
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Good luck OP. I'm also quitting smoking. My last cigarette was 14 hours ago kinda craving but I'm doing okay I think.
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Try the book "the easy way to stop smoking" by Allen Carr.
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She will probably dump you sometime after with stuff like "you're not the same guys as before" so yeah, get fucked
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>be me, 24, livin' the neet life
>wake up after many restless hours of online combat and realise it's nearly afternoon
>hungry
>need tendies
>mommy is out, ergo, no tendies
>OHGOD.jpg
>will die of starvation if hunger needs are not met
>open curtains
>think about getting tendies on my own
>but then i'd have to venture out into the wilderness
>breath in
>breath out
>make the brave decision to go outside bear grylls style
>grab glock 22 for protection
>be brave and step outside
>jump over fence dukes of hazzard style. i don't land on my feet, but my voluptuous stud body cushioned my fall
>enter stealth mode
>four hours later
>starved, parched, nearly dead, but i muster up my courage to soldier on in search of my tendies
>walk past chicken pen on main street corner
>if my calculations are correct, tendies are chicken + batter
>do not know how to get batter, but know how to get chicken
>ahavoicesoundeffect.wav
>i have chickens in front of me
>and i have my trusty pistol
>look behind
>look to the side
>roll over fence
>chickens are in front of me
>get my minecraft on and attack chickens for chicken meat
>gunshots are louder than i'd like them to be, but my trusty glock comes to the rescue
>chickens are also louder than i'd like them to be and cluck and prance all around the pen, but by this point i have already killed four.
>decide i have enough chicken to satisfy my cravings
>try to open pen
>steel fencing, barbed wire and has a padlock on gate
>fuck
>decide to shoot the padlock
>fire two shots
>hear screaming
>"GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!" repeat ad infinitum.
>old man runs at me with gun in his hand
>point my gun matrix-style and get my neo on and fire.
>we both fire at each other in this adrenaline-filled battle of the ages
>only a few shots fired before gun locks open
>OHSHIT.jpg
>more yelling and screaming, this time from over the fence
>"STOP!" everybody yells
>turns out my hunting escapades have attracted quite the crowd
cont. in part 2
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part 2!
>REEEEEEEEEE like i've never REEEEEEE'd before as i call out for mommy to come and rescue me
>look down at voluptuous stud body
>blood
>there's blood
>and it hurts
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>townsfolk suddenly appear and hold me down
>i'm still REEEEEEEEEEing like there's no tomorrow, calling out for my dear mommy
>i'm scared
>everyone tells me that everything's going to be okay
>i realise that everything will be okay if mommy comes
>tell everybody to call mommy for me
>they do
>i cry tears of joy for my mommy and the tendies i will receive in the future
>they also call the police and the ambulance
>angry old man will be jailed for life for getting in my way and the ambulance will drive me to the hospital and fix me up
>start to think of the cool scars i will get to add a rough masculine edge to sex appeal to distract me from the pain
>ambulance arrives
>load me onto the stretcher
>expect crowd to cheer me on as i get put into ambulance for my brave heroic escapades
>hospital people are stuggling to lift my glorious body into the ambulance
>outsiders help them lift me into ambulance
>"Hold your ground! Hold your ground! Sons of Gondor, of Rohan, my brothers." i proudly proclaim as i am lifted into ambulance.
>proceed to deliver aragon's epic speech as the ambulance prepares to take me away
>as ambulance takes me to the hospital, i cry brave tears for the battle i have fought today for my love of sweet, sweet tendies
>arrive at hospital after forever
>many people pushing me into scary looking white room
>call out for mommy
>call out for food
>"anon, dinner will be served at 7pm. until then, just rest easy and we'll sort everything out."
>look at clock
>3pm
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>call for mommy
>"ms. anon will be on her way."
>cry tears of joy
>asshole from next bed over tells me to shut up
>he doesn't know what i've been through, the horrors i've dealt with, the demons i've faced
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
read more in part 3
>>
part 3 of my grand battle, but you can read about it in the wikipedia page in the future that will document my heroic struggles
>look at tv
>dumb reality show shit for sheeple of the lowers common denominator
>put some fucking netflix on or some shit
>people are walking towards me
>mommy?
>not mommy
>it's the police
>fuckthepolice.mp3
>"mr... anon, is that right?"
>"yes" i say
>police tell me i've been placed under arrest for aggravated assault with a deadly weapon along with breaking and entering and destruction of property and other dumb shit
>BUT AGGRAVATED ASSAULT?
>THOSE FUCKING GODDAMNED CUNT SUCKING PISS PISS FUCK CUNT FUCK FUCK FUCKING FUCK NORMIES FUCK CUNT LIFE IS RUINED FUCK CUNT FUCK
>ALSO MY POST ISN'T FUCKING SPAM
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Maybe you'll lose weight in prison? Either that or you'll lose the weight from malnutrition at a psych ward. So long space robot!
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>there is now a token autistic superhero
has pc culture gone too far?
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>nutty virgin neet
why is this so accurate
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>>34907663
I watched this while high af around my family and the surround sound really fucked me when secnes with the whispering voices (happens to me sometimes when high) came on and I was freaking out that i had lost it and that what im watching is just a dream. I felt 100% schizophrenic and that my parents were gonna commit me. I skedadled out of there like 20mins into the episode and played some mount & blade.
What was the name of this show?
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There should be an autistic supervillain too. I've been thinking about it for a while, he'd be called the Spectral Snowflake and have ice powers and moderate OCD. Light blue costume with some rainbow accents.
Dear FBI, please spook me by posting something that will make me know that you know who I am. Your spookiness is the only thing that gets my adrenaline going and makes me do something productive. Please break my addiction from this site but not in a malevolent way (prison or doing something sneaky like labeling me a pedophile because of some dumbass on here posting a young girl which I did not actively search for).
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HelIo James.
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>>34907608
That's a weird fetish, but I kind of understand.
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>>34907608
Stop Pepsi
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How do I find a friend
I know that faggot is out there somewhere but how do I find him
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post cantact homie
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I don't know, I'm socially retarded and very distrustful of all people.
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I'll be your friend xxx
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Has anyone on /r9k/ personally reported an illegal immigrant?
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>>34907569
that would require me to leave me room to find one to report
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>>34907569
if only i was a racist autistic NEET
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No. But a girl I was dating had overstayed her visa and got caught and banned from re-entry when she tried to leave back home. Good thing I was actually tired of her and was going to break up with her anyway, this made it easier.
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So I'm taking human sexual behavior at uni and the class is a woman's studies class so pretty much everyone is feminist and female. There are two doors to get to this class, one to enter the building and the second one to enter the classroom. So I'm walking to class and open the first day and hold the door open for the woman behind me (I would do this for guy or girl) and she says thank you, when I say hold the door I mean keep the door open until she's close enough to grab the door herself. So I'm still ahead of her and open the second door to the class and do the same but instead of thanks she says "nice!". I feel like she was being patronizing or rude or something l, am I reading too much into this?
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Don't hold the door for anybody. Just swing it open enough for you to clear it and don't look back.
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Fuck you, what a incredible waste of time read this shit
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>>34907504
everybody does this for everyone. make eye contact for the first door while you're making sure someone is close enough (less than three seconds in my opinion). you fucked up by making eye contact the second time, when you were probably pretty certain the same person was behind you. just throw the door open in a way that ensures it stays open for a sec, eyes forward.
Millimetres Make Models
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>>34907493
Your dick must be a model then
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>>34907860
>Your dick must be a model then
OHHHHH SSHIIIIIITTTTTT
OP BTFO HOLY SHIT HOW DOES ANON DO IT OMG OMG OMG
OP FUCKING DEVASTATED!!!!!! OPS BUTT IS DESTRYOED!!!! IRREDEEMABLE!!!! UNCONCIEVABLE!!!!!!!
HOW THE FUCK DOES ANON KEEP ON DOING IT OH MY GOD HOW CAN SOMEONE SO UTTERLY DESTROY OP HOLY FUCK THIS IS AMAZING
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really change Nigel's lips and get rid of a bit of neck fat and he's a handsome chap
Is there a more robot music genre than dub techno?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMmuwoYEHOw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6HyB4nViMfI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlNt60v9tNw
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robots must only listen to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8OOLnmjJ4D0
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hey op got a soundcloud
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at first i thought you were going to post something lame, so i didn't listen
but i'm mesmerized.
leave your info or message me
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>tfw you will never get a fembot gf
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>>34907428
Tfw will never have that seemingly qt Slasian girl with the oneitis as your writing partner
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>>34907428
oh no, I'll never have a 'gf' that used to be a guy?
Darn you, o cruel fate
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>tfw no seemingly qt Slasian girl writing partner
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Was there ever a bigger QT than Wendy?
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>>34907423
Honestly she was pretty hot when she was young
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>>34907423
Fun fact: Kubrick terrorised her so much when filming The Shinning that here hair started to fall out. Because, apparently, only real terror is good enough for Kubrick.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QvwRfHb5A3w
Sad tbqh senpai
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Don't forget, anon, you're here for life.
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>>34907346
Jokes on you. I'll probably be dead within the year
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And so are you, loser
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>>34907346
Good thing I deserve to be here