Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 8807. page

>>35228677
Ignore my misspelling, Im currently using a phone.

>>35228677
good for you

bloxx

>>35228677
>I'm shaving me head tommorow
>I'm tired of balding and trying to hide it making me look like a insecure faggot
Good news for you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFDpZWGlaTs

>>35228620
Your brain will force you to breathe. It puts its survival needs ahead of your intent.

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>>35228620
TIFU by holding my breath and passing out during a lecture.

This happened earlier today. So I was in class listening to a lecture and it dawned on me that I couldn't care less about what my professor was talking about. So I decided to start holding my breath. Now, this is something I normally do if I get really bored. I'll hold my breath for as long as I can and then I'll rest for 3 minutes. I'll do 5 sets of that. I also make sure to pinch my nose as to avoid cheating. I've actually gotten pretty good at it and can hold my breath for 2 minutes and 15 seconds now. Anyways, I start holding my breath and I'm feeling particularly good and I start thinking I can break my record today. I got to about 2 minutes and 20 seconds on my first attempt and then I decide to drop out. "I can do better, let's go for 2 minutes and 50 seconds". So I go and I'm feeling super confident about it. I get to 2 minutes 20 sec and I'm feeling a little light headed. Get to 2 min and 30 seconds and I'm struggling. Like I'm thrashing around silently in my chair, but I'm going for gold. Get to 2 minutes 40 and I'm seriously hurting. Things are getting bad. I close my eyes to avoid looking at my watch (It also made the seconds go faster) All of a sudden I open my eyes and I'm looking up at the ceiling and everyone is flipping out. As I learned from the girl sitting next to me, it turns out my maximum effort resulted into me passing out, smashing my head on my desk, and falling out of my chair. I spent the next 10 minutes trying to explain to everyone that I was fine. Lecture finally resumed and I just sat there feeling like a dumbass with a gnarly headache. Lecture still sucked after that.

TL;DR Tried going for Olympic gold in breath holding. Failed and ended up spread eagle in our lecture hall.

EDIT: A word

>>35228833
If you hyperventilate before, you can lower the co2 in your blood which means you can run out of oxygen before feeling the impulse, which is triggered by co2 levels

>>35228559
You will have to groom one. They definitely don't fall out of the sky.

have you tried fetlife

>>35228600
This. Basically if you want to be pegged you have to pay for it. Women aren't naturally dominant so you have to give them money to hurt you. No-one has ever been tenderly abused by a woman who genuinely loves you and only you, because women can't love a man .

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mari from smosh is an unrated qt

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Half cosplayer/half youtuber

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>>35228760
Another pic of heeeeerrrrrr. I don't actually watch her content though.

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>>35228414

Virgins smell nice though

>>35228414
better then smelling like rotting tuna!

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Sorry that must be me, I'll leave...

I drank half a fifth of vodka the other day and totaled my car on the freeway. When a state cop pulled up to write a report for the accident I convinced him I hadn't been drinking at all. This is the third time I've talked my way out of a DUI.

>>35228472
That's pretty impressive. Have you ever been arrested for a DUI outside of those three times?

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>>35228567
Nope, although the second time I was charged with a misdemeanor for driving with a 2 months expired license. I showed up to the hearing on acid. I'm human garbage lmao.

Back to wizchan, mate. This board is ours.

>>35228266
If you're fat just lose the weight and get pussy

Us facially deformed uglies are the true robots

nigga couldn't even be bothered to put on a clean shirt. what a normie

My dad is a great person but he's also the most annoying person that I've ever been around.

>says "did you know that?", "do you know why?", or "huh mom?" very frequently
>sometimes when he walks inside he'll loudly shout "huh mom?" for absolutely no reason
>has an incredibly loud yawn where he shouts "Ow gosh I'm yawning now"
>usually follows his yawns with "guess what? I was yawning."
>yawns about every 45 seconds when he's tired (I'm autistic enough to time him)
>his nose makes a whistling sound every time he breathes
>chews and drinks so loud I can hear him from across the room
>snores so loudly I can hear him from anywhere in the house

I need to move out.

>>35228236
kek this sounds similar to my dad

i'm guessing he's a control freak

My Pops was in prison for a large majority of my life...I saw him for the first time since I was a child, after 2 decades at the age of 27. We had a couple of beers and smoked a J...good time. Yeah, your Dad sounds like a creepy cunt...he probably fondles you in your sleep.
lol

>>35228209
FUCK THAT---WHY IS MY GOD DAMN IMAGE TURNED SIDEWAYS FUCKING REEEEEEEEEEEEEE I SHOULD HAVE BEEN AN ABORTION FUCK MY GOD DAMN FUCKING EXISTENCE THIS ISN'T WORTH IT ANYMORE

>>35228209
Lose interest in traps because they aren't gay?

>>35228209
Realise that your acceptance of homosexuality is merely an acceptance of your lack of success with women.

Next step is to not put your penis up a man's shitter and quit denying your future children the right to exist.

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>>35228130
I'll start
Posting this qt 3.14

>>35228130
more funny memes!

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>>35228183
Have another one senpai
Post qts to

Truly a great university

>>35228056
>>professor drops lowest grade
lol

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>>35228037
>>>/ic/
If there's so many of you, you may want to try /ic/.

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>>35228082
nah /ic/ is too much about ability, i dont care about that i want to see peoples creative outlets as a hobby

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lets give it one more try boys

>half black emo girl
heh

>>35227980
>I also showed my face

in the same pics as the nudes? why did you do that?

>>35228060
No not in the same pics as the nudes.

Do not hurt the animes

>>35227874
You need to put them in their place, keep them submissive. The only way to achieve this is through violence.

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>>35227859
>>he doesn't beat his waifu.
WTF LOL

>>35227838
Alrighty, where do you want to go?

>>35227838
It's like 4am, I don't know you and I'm in my toilets in the middle of my nightly shitting session, who the hell are you?