Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7696. page

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I have a reflex already. Just move mouse down-right and minimize all windows when I hear door to my room open. Picrel is my desktop.

>>35758961

Need a hand, Anon?

>>35758961
>be 14 year old me
>on family computer in the basement looking at porn
>hear footsteps starting down the stairs
>oh shit, time to close out
>click the X
>shitty ass computer freezes
>oh fuck
>footsteps getting closer to the bottom
>mash the X as fast as I can
>constantly glancing over my shoulder, paranoid
>the page just won't fucking close
>footsteps reach the bottom stair
>FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
>the page finally closes
>mom rounds the corner and heads in my direction
>jesus fucking christ thank fu--
>out of the corner of my eye spot the google search toolbar on the browser
>something is still entered there
>HOT TEEN PORN
>YOUCOULDHAVEPREVENTEDTHIS.EXE
>the world is about to end
>mom is almost behind me
>no time to delete it
>"hey anon..."
>enter full panic mode
>lean my hand awkwardly against the screen to cover the box
>mom instantly gives me a weird look
>"anon?"
>yeah?
>flailing desperately to select and delete the text under my hand without looking and without being too obvious
>"what are you doing?"
>uh, what?
>"is there something under there I shouldn't see?"
>this is it, I'm fucked
>dejectedly remove my hand
>look at the screen
>somehow I was able to delete the search
>breathe the biggest silent sigh of release
>"oh... okay."
>gives me another weird look and leaves without even asking me the question she came down for
In retrospect I'm sure it was pretty obvious what I was doing, but the fact that the proof wasn't there at the moment was what saved my ass. Came pretty close to a premature heart attack there.

>>35758944
the very first thing the providers should do is share the histories of every senator with the press

justice demands it

>>35758944
It still has to go through the the House and Presidency. After that the Supreme Court can still end it. You can continue being robot for now

>>35759022
I'll see you in the work camps, brother.

probably because they aren't killing society like the WMAFs

>>35758937

Stacy and Chad making out, folks. Nothing to see here. Move along.

>>35758955
how is wmaf killing society?

This board has always been cancer.

>>35758824
Don't be myopic OP, fembots exist. If you don't like the threads hide them and move on.

What does need to go are footfag threads. They'll be the end of this board.

>>35758979
This.
And maybe tell all the thirsty as fuck robots to not fall for fembots.

>>35758777
Today as I walked past a girl and her friend she smiled at me and made eye contact. I think she thought I was someone else because why would she smile at me!? I didn't even know her! It gave me an adrenaline rush and took my breath away when it happened.

>>35758777
I always hated that shit.

I let a fedex driver to go at a busy intersection, and he put his arm out of his truck and pointed at me Sammy Davis Jr style. I felt so fucking cool.

>>35758776
excersise
it will make you eat more

im 24 130 lbs skelly myself
really tired of seeing hs guys bigger then me
planing on exercising home for a while and hopefully going to gym

once had a summer job working 10h a day
ate like triple of what i usually do and gained some weight during those 2 months

>>35758776
it's a lie anon. this is an important thing to learn.

It's a ruse

An original ruse

>>35758774
most likely

ero

>>35758774
>Not merrily prancing about humming the Tom Bombadil song

>>35758774
I guess but it's to be expected since I'm a tranny

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nope

pic reIated

I don't think Christians should be robots

The problem is I don't go to church, drink a lot, and also jerk off all the time and spend most of my time on 4chan. Even if I did find one it wouldn't last long before she realized how autistic I am.

do something new every day.

Doesnt have to be anything big.

>>35758577
Do anything

>>35758602
What should I do right now?

I'll do anything. Can't be life threatening.

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>>35758544
>pony gaming

i don't know if you're even being ironic or not but you shouldn't advertise your /mlp/ discord here

bumprunoshjdhsahdksajh

Are horse people real?

no looks like she's fit's girl, jocking frank yang. shovel faced gook

Cringe as fuck tbqhf

I fucking hate when "fembots" meme spout. Its so fucking unfunny.

>>35758693
It's cringey when anyone meme spouts irl. It's funny because she does it anyway, like she's actually autistic

...you contact a prostitute and tell her that's what you want to do...

yes its called beeing lonely and wanting to have a gf.
I doubt that anyone here in /r9k/ will know that feel

>>35758622
never posted here before.

>>35758571
HOW DO I GET IN TOUCH

Do it, shortie. Original

>manlet
>wants to shave legs

just become a girl already

>shave legs
>feels great
>just feels stubbly after 1-2 days
>little red ugly spots on your legs
am i doing something wrong or does shaving your legs just fucking suck

im embarrassed of my leg hair for some reason and only feel comfortable wearing shorts during summer if i dont have leg hair

>>35758487
>any advice fagbots

Not a fag myself but my advice 4u is kys you fucking degenerate

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>>35758487
You don't.
You can't become one. Is genetic, either you are or you aren't. If you are asking for help, I assume your case is the later.

Stop using the word trap you fucking crossdressers. I can already tell you're wanting laughable leg poster advice and have zero chance of passing

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Sometimes reasons,
other times autism.

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server link (post legs upon joining)

https://discord.gg/TBENaeN

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how do I get friends who aren't on the spectrum?