"you are awesome. You are so funny and smart and attractive and I have no doubt that you will hit off with some lucky lady when you get to college"
My crush just sent me this, and it pretty much confirms I am none of these things. I feel like worthless garbage now. Should I consider ending it, r9k?
>>35891587
>tfw my ex left me for some douchebag she told me this
they never not lie
Ah yes, the typical "you will make some girl so happy some day" meme. Pretty sure we've all heard this.
>>35891630
always. best suicide methods?
Does anyone know where I can buy an 8.9 cubic feet 99.999% helium gas tank? I live in the US
>>35891502
Don't kill your self man plz
>>35891502
Home Depot, perhaps?
car in a garage is better
AND INSTEAD I'M SHITPOSTING HERE!!!1!!
>>35891501
good
fuck uni, keep shitposting brother
>>35891501
H-H-HEY GUYS I HAVE A 3000 PAGE ESSE DOO TMMR I HAVENT EVNE LE STARTED XP
I have two tests tomorrow but i ain't studying for that shit boiiiiiii it's shitposting hours my robot and if a liberal uni professor doesn't like it he can suck this virgin robot DICK
>gf is cheating
>too beta to confront her
>she kisses me when she gets home every day
please feed me poison
>>35891441
Is it really worth going through this much emotional stress just to share a hole with some prick?
Just confront her, she sounds like scum anyway.. get rid...
>>35891441
>Having a GF
>Implying you're not a virgin
>You're also a cuck
There's no hope for you and you don't belong on this board. Time to leave.
>>35891441
sabatoge her life
How can I be so desperately in love with women I've never met?
>>35891388
I'm glad to see there are fellow men of taste on this board
>>35891388
because you haven't actually met her
>>35891430
fuck me i just want to be her slaveee
I need a comfy thread. Stories about going to theme parks?
>go to Universal Studios
>in line for Jaws ride
>some kid leaps onto the railing and falls in the water
I miss that ride.
>>35891222
Did the shark eat him?
>2007, 17 years old
>go to Disney World with my brother, mom, her friend, and her friend's young daughter
>had a bad inner ear infection the entire time so I spent the whole week we were in the area laying in the room where we stayed with a high fever while everyone else had fun
>jerked off with mom's friend's daughter's panties a couple times
They brought me a toy flintlocke pistol, a cool little Lilo & Stitch pen, and a coffee mug to give to our dad. Unfortunately the pen broke in my bag on the way back and the next year my brother dropped the coffee mug in the driveway when we were coming back from a camping trip. Still have the toy flintlocke though. It's pretty neat.
>1992
>go to celebration of Aladdin
>get spit on by a camel
2010 - 2011 Commentary era
2011 - begin 2012 Horror games era
2012 - Summer 2012 Happy wheels era
Fall 2012 - Begin 2013 Comfy playthrough era
2013 Number 1 era
2014 - 2015 random games era
2015 - 2016 clickbait era
2016 - now Trigger era
Mine has to be the comfy playthrough era
>System of a down outro
>Comfy intro's
>Complete playthroughs of story games
>Walking Dead
>Heavy Rain
>>35891081
I remember watching him when he only had ~20mil subs, so when would that be? I do remember the happy wheels era
>>35891081
>watching content as shit as pewd
saged
>>35891114
Happy wheels era was before 1 million
Spider-Mas has it.
>>35891028
Spida Mang
>>35891141
That's my rap name look out for me homie my mixtape's coming out sometime within the next 5 years nigga
lel even Hollywood sticks to light skinned black girls
I did it guys, I'm no longer a robot
>be me in uni
>eat lunch
>some qtpie starts talking to me
>she needs money to buy lunch at the cafeteria
>promises to pay back, winks
>I loan the money, we eat food
>go to the boys toilet
>no condoms, go in raw
>always thought I was small but when I push it in she says "ahh it's too big!!"
>fuck her, she keeps panting, her tongue out and says how I'm hitting her womb
>cum inside
>take a pic of the girl, sitting on the toilet, my cum dripping from her pussy
>she poses for the shot, doing the peace sign
>go to leave and go to lecture
A-am I welcome here anymore?
Post the pic then get out
No, you are hereby banished permanently from /r9k/.
Lucky.
>>35891007
Enjoy your HIV.
Now get out you normie.
>tfw chad thought he was cool bringing his Subaru to work
>Trying to show off to the girls
>tfw after work i threw a brick at his windshield and he never knew who it was
top kek thatll teach him.
>>35890937
were you the only non-girl there?
might have made it obvious who did it.
especially if you looked angry while he was showing off.
I'd double check your homes locks and get a rape whistle robot.
>>35890937
If you have beef with the guy hit him not his car pussy
Any robots in Queensland?
Uni's just been called off and Brisbane's shutting down from the rain, so I'm just staying indoors and playing Overwatch.
>>35890828
I'm about to go to bed
long day making Pepe's and trying to ignore the fact that I want to die.
Bowen here. Shut the fuck up OP. You don't know shit.
>>35890828
Rural here, "sever wind warning".
>It's just raining
>Attempt to OD
>Wake up anyways
Fuck this shit.
Is it possible to chug cleaning chemicals or does the body panic and stop you?
Don't tell me to get helium. I literally have no money anymore. I got a month before I'm evicted.
>>35890763
Try and choke yourself with your own hands. Not only is it cheap, but it will mystify investigators.
>>35890790
literally impossible my friend, but it would be fun desu.
What did you take? Just curious.
>tfw my mom found my loli sex doll in the closet and says she wants me to go to therapy
>>35890753
you should listen to your mother
>tfw you go to therapy and your therapist quits her job because of you
>>35890753
tell her its only small because its because the big full sized ones are so much more expensive.
it makes sense to have a smaller doll because of economic scale.
>tfw want to wear cute clothing like leggings and clothes that expose my belly
>no friends here at college
>horribly asocial so can't get anyone to help me come out of my shell
>can't lean on someone to help me get comfortable wearing stuff like this in public
>also no fashion sense regarding feminine clothing
>constant scowl and dead eyes so not cute
>body is fairly feminine though
>6'4, 165lbs, small waist, thin wrists, toned legs
Why must I suffer.
>>35890713
If you weren't 6'4 you'd be the perfect trap
>6'4
All non Chad tall guys just want to be cute. I know the feeling as I'm 6 ft myself. It's an awful life
>>35890798
Might as well just get muscular and become a real life rohan
>trying to cook Frito pie
>kid sister starts fucking with shit and drops a pot on my bare foot
>says "oops" but doesn't sound like she cares
>mad; foot hurting
>grab her by her shorts and give her a hanging wedgie
>she screams her ass off
>put her down and watch her run away shrieking
Should I feel bad?
>>35890655
>Frito pie
Did it come out well?
Go give her a hug, apologize, and tell her you love her
>>35890703
It came out gr9..
>>35890655
No, those creatures will literally start screeching at the slightest distress.