Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7319. page

"waiting for a response"
Zoinks time to abort and tell her it was a prank

>>35955377
Abort mate

>>35956211
It's a good day, he can use the April Fools excuse.

>>35955376
>hehe computer so easy XD
No, you didn't, and fuck off.

>>35955376
Activate the self destructing mechanism.

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>>35955376
No one gives a fuck, you friendless loser.
"Hey guys, im a le l33t haxor lmao, so ez. hmu if u want me to hack a girls fb for u"
Fucking retard

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Cont 2


>the plains was a deadly place, but we robots made an alliance with the cyborgs to set up shop there
>we got to base and we told them our story but they were having trouble of their own
>with the pressure from the stacies and the treason of the manipulated cyborgs they were in a pickle and needed all the help they could get to fight chad thundercocks forces
>we were sent to pussy lake to fight the stacies. I told rick to stay alive, because stacies always know how to push your buttons
>they came up in pink jeeps they're daddies bought for them attacking from the north we fired our piss bottle cannons
>i saw alot of good cyborgs and robots taken from us, but it couldnt be helped, we had to keep the line
>a stacy fired a fish line to lure rick to their clutches but i swatted it. Even though i was resistant to their traps it still burned.
>rick called medic tanner, a chubby cyborg with a katana and mt.dew syringe and his support robot dan, they healed me up and told me we had to escape on one of their jeeps, as the stacies attacks are too much
>we ran to the jeep but it was too late, most of the garrison was dead or captured and it looked like we were too.
>at this point i knew it was over as we were heading for fort brah, a place robots,fembots and cyborgs all fear

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Cont 3

>we made it to fort brah a place where you go from being a robot to a normie however sometimes the experiments go wrong and your turned into a failed normie
>we were herded with some fembots and forced to make "contact" with them. I was ashamed of what i did that day, but low and be hold it was getting the better of rick, so better it attracted the head stacy, stacy typhoonpussy
>i begged rick not to do something crazy but it was too late, he was a normie now
>devastated I turned to the only thing i knew in fort brah, fucking the fembots there.
>6 months went on, one of the fembots made deal with us to help us break out, which was that they would give us some pussy if we all chipped in to break out
>tanner and the other cyborgs were overjoyed but us robots werent
>head fembot may said we'd be given an large sum of tendies each month
>we all agreed and staged an orgy to get the normies attention
>dan turned the lights off and we beat the normies to a pulp, we then made a mad dash for the armory
>normie tech was inferior to robot tech but it couldn't be helped, we mowed down the stacy guards
>almost at the exit we were stopped by stacy typhoon pussy in a mech
>she told us we weren't leaving until we became normies to serve chad thundercock
>i said id rather die and began to run but tanner unsheathed his katana and cut typhoonpussy in half
>tanner posed and tipped his hat, until typhoonpussy grabbed him taking him with her to the depths
>we had no time to grieve as we all knew that this war wouldn't end unless we had chad thundercocks head at normie city

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Cont 4

>this is it I thought riding in our stolen jeep
>tanner,simon and ricks sacrifices wont be in vain once shit bomb normie city
>may came over to me and said she's sorry about rick
>i thanked her, weird, normally I wouldve flipped a fembot off for making me feel, but this time... it was different
>am I becoming a normie as i leaned in to kiss may
>maybe its not so bad I thought as we fucked
>dan then came in and reminded me why were here, to avenge our fallen robots not to fuck
>i came to my senses and im sure may did too
>we arrived at the gate and snuck in
>we then kidnapped some normies and assimilated ourselves
>we headed to the tower where chad thundercock was at, with dan radioing in for an attack
>an hour later our calls were answered with airplanes filled with fellow robots and cum jar bombs
>we headed upwards until i saw it
>rick in a mech. Emotions flooded through me and all sense was lost, i just wanted my private back
>chad thundercock ordered rick to fight me as he left,may and dan gave chase, rick hesitated but stopped them.
>i screamed DONT DO THIS RICK, YOUR A ROBOT AND YOU KNOW THAT,THIS ISNT YOU
>rick shouted back saying he had a loving gf who always gave him sex once a week
>all 3 of us cringed, i then said as i went to punch him YOUR GF IS ONLY PITY FUCKING YOU, YOUR BEING KEKED!
>it then became an all out brawl, I slammed rick to the ground but he recovered and beat me with a jab to the stomach he then grabbed a trophy and knocked my head in. I got up and stopped another blow and kneed him. He went down andi began to slam him, the more i did the more i saw the rick i knew
>the place was shook by a cum jar bomb and a fire spread
>rick told me he was sorry, the thought of a gf got the better of him
>holding him in my arms i forgave him as he had his last breath
>once again there was no time to grieve only vengeance
>i wanted chads head

>>35955308

I wonder how many kills /k/ has in total

Good one OP.
There's still time admins.

Did they kill all the other threads on the combined boards, or are they just frozen for the time being?

>>35955295
An embarrassing amount of times. Always regret.

>>35955295
A literally who?

Once

That video where she shows her ass to the cam is whew

bump

Does anyone care?

She feels sorry for you and she is repeating dude to remind you, you never had a chance.

>>35955806
Women almost never say, "Dude," the unironic way she used it though.

Nothing.
Ran dry months ago and too neet to buy new booze.
Only thing I have is a bottle of red wine but I never get motivated enough to do it

Also I like Johnny Walker red

>>35955462
>Also I like Johnny Walker red
Yeah, it's pretty good, and not too expensive.
I don't like wine at all.

This thread has inspired me to stop at the shop on the way home tonight.

I'll probably buy a bourbon, Woodford reserve, or Elijah Craig most likely.

>>35955237
I don't regret mine.

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>>35955237
>The ones that just keep popping up and even when you get them all it tells you your wrong and you have to do it again

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>>35955237
fucking lrn 2 4chan

That's a funny April Fools joke, OP.

>>35955184
yeah, why not? what reason is there for me not to kill myself?

Thanks man :)
No orig

>>35955177
you have like 5 months, whats the problem?

>>35955297
Kys fag

Orgrenaolaola

>>35955177
Why would you promise that? Good luck robro

Just make a bunch of
>tfw no robot gf
threads until something works out. That seems to be what everyone else here does, and it seems to have an okayish success rate.

At least compared to your probable odds in the real world.

>>35955177
How did the subject come up with her and why did you make the promise?

https://youtu.be/DwsMNRhUFzE
forgot link

you mean mode

>>35955174
Yes we naturally have a teenage population. Once you finish college abd get int adulthood you don't have time to shitpost. If you do You fucked up

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>>35955165
you're the man anon.

orgiblox

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>>35955195
Thanks, anon.

>>35955165
Just realized I should have used devilish pepe instead but the standard smug one works too.

post her feet then.

>>35955149
>hasn't technically cheated

What happened, anon?

>>35955239
Nothing I know about, but she's in Canada all the time you know?

>>35955149
She's definitely fucking another man right now if she hasn't done so before. Your gf's a whore and you are a cuck

>>35955025
Nah, the meme really only applies to dicklets
(Aka dicks under 8 inches)
Since they're literally less of a man than someone bigger

>>35955025
I've publicly made fun out of a lot of manlets myself.

>>35955061
Sure ya did. I'm 6'2 and even I wouldn't do that. Total dick move.

Forgot to mention my mom left the cake

wew
Not anywhere this thread can go but you have my sympathies Anon, that sounds pretty mortifying

Suicide is always an option and I recommend you look into it