I was a *special* little boy.
> I'm probably 7 in this story.
> Have disturbing, crazy ass dream.
> In my dream, God tells me my dog has become an idol and that I need to repent.
> I have to sacrifice my dog, or I'll never get into heaven.
> Tie poor doggo on top of a rock and stab away, until I wake up in a fetal position, crying.
> Allahuakbar.mov
> ff
> It's some time after school, and I get the creeping suspicion that maybe that dream was real, some kind of prophecy.
> Lose my shit and panic. I can't go to hell.
> Dog is sitting next to me on the couch, no one else is in the room.
> I must do what's right.
> Grab a butter knife from the kitchen and walk over to her. I'm >this< close to bursting into treats.
> "I'm so, so sorry doggo. But it's you or me."
> Flip her on her back and ineffectively poke her gut with the dull butter knife.
> I've got a literal stream of tears down my face, I'm trying so hard not to sob so no one will come and stop me.
> This is all on the living room couch mind you.
> Dog looks a lot more confused/concerned for me than scared.
> Knife still obviously isn't working.
> "WHY WON'T YOU JUST DIE ALREADY FOR JESUS?!?"
> Mom comes running in now, and pulls me off of her.
> I fully break down now and tell her why I'm going to hell because of the dog.
> In between trying not to laugh, she calms me down.
> Still in trouble for trying to hurt the dog.
> ff again
> I'm in bed, trying to sleep but feeling too guilty.
> Pupper comes in room and curls up with me, all is forgiven.
>>36197807
GOD here.
You've still got your ticket to hell.
Upgrade to heaven requires dog sacrifice.
What can I say? I fucking love dead dogs.
>>36197857
I just kek'd for a solid 3 minutes.
Good show, sir.
>>36197807
Being 8 was fun
>Make imaginary planet
>Imaginary alien race, culture, etc.
>Get invested in lives of some aliens
>Name them, draw them, write stories about their lives
>Cue the fucking war criminal
>Escapes torture prison
>Freezes planet and all citizens, including imaginary friend alienbros
>"Don't worry, they aren't dead. They're just stuck like that forever and have to live stuck in ice with no way to do anything but stare."
>Never resolved that shit; just left perfectly innocent imaginary friends stuck in the ninth circle of hell for no reason
MINNA NI KIDZUKARANE YO NI
watamote is back?
oh nvm, it's the kawaii feel good shit ripoff of it
>>36197789
Fuck off Vyro. Tomoko is shit.
Watamote is infinitely more realistic than Himouto when trying to show off a robot's life. Though tomoko is significantly more lucky than most robots because she's a girl and her autistic episodes in public aren't nearly as bas the average robot. Himouto meanwhile shows off the main character with real friends and a feel good attitude about being a NEET.
Himouto a shit. Tomoko is charming but meh.
>some random roastie I have friended on facebook just changed her profle pic to this.
You can't make this shit up folks
>that cross necklace
I know Jesus gave mercy to whores but this takes it to a new level.
Ahhh, pissed black women, my old penemesis.
>>36197763
Being Christian is just a fad. You're not actually believing the Biblic bullshit, you're just pretending.
Robots please help. I've aquired a new fetish and I can't find pr0n of it anywhere.
anyone know if feminist hate fuck porn exists?
My penor needs to know
some feminst porn was on at famous face fucking site you know the girl from some american university who got outed as a porn star forget her name bella something
>>36197974
I know of it.
I don't like facefucking though.
what the fuck is feminist porn?
Just wanted to say to Trout on steam:
go fuck yourself you prick
now I can go peacefully
>>36197683
What did he do?
oreganao
>>36197794
Told OP he's into girls
>>36197683
Trout removed me from discord, that's kind of mean :<
Am I the only one on /r9k/ that is on female hormones but lives as a guy and doesn't attempt to pass as a girl?
>>36197599
You are still a degenerate
gas yourself
>>36197599
So, how is it being mentally ill?
what the fuck is the point
GF material or no?
Maybe if you're desperate.
>>36197440
I wouldn't trust her to be faithful so no.
>>36197440
Fuck material yes, gf material depends on her personality. Probably not though, seems like she needs a ton of public attention to feel validated.
Being brainlet is the best way to enjoy life, simply because when you build a living with no use of intelligence or intellectual skills/behaviour/attitudes everything is easier and more pleasurable, especially if you add to all this a low perception of the self. How to be a brainlet anons?
>>36197409
bump
original oregano86674568
It's not about being a brainlet, it's about to see in a positive way. You can be stupid AF and still hate life. You can totally be a genius an dfit in a good social life, It's just about the point of veiw.
>>36197803
I don't know any stupid af people who aren't enjoying life in this moment, I have plenty of normie friends who haven't any intellectual interests and attitude and they're all happy, naive, literally always. On the other hand I have a close friend which is a very talented musician and artist and he has been facing a bad depression for years. The more things you burden your brain with, the more your life becomes heavier.
What does the apocalypse look like?
>>36197369
Will it bring famine??
>>36197383
Or conquest?
>>36197398
Will men smile at the face of death?
Losing weight won't make me white
>>36197353
I know the feeling. I just hope maybe once I do I can be cute and go for a Hau kind of look, he's cute at least even though he has tan skin. I've been growing my hair out to try and match his, but it's not working too well. I think I might have to find some other hairstyle, I don't know. I just want to be cute and feel good
>>36197353
It will make you less disgusting though
>>36197463
You will never be as cute as an anime.
I love this goat woman so much, I want her to be my mommy. I want her to tell me that I'm a sweet little boy and hug me and tell me that she'll always be here for me. I want her to teach me about lewd stuff maybe too. Or maybe not and we could have just the comfy mommy life just without the lewd things and I could just secretly fantasize about it. I love her so much
Same but with Asgore.
anon, delet this please
I've just got myself out of the furry phase
>>36197376
That might be nice too, but I'm more of a mama's boy I think
>>36197416
Sorry anon. You don't have to consider yourself a furry, I don't, I just love Toriel. It's all gonna be okay.
>be 27 yr old virgin
>not even that unattractive
Holy fuck, I don't care how the sex happens at this point. Prostitution, cheating, normal dating, it's all fair game.
I better look down and find a pussy attached to my cock very fucking soon.
I don't care about any of this "you're a degenerate" garbage. I'm not going to turn 28 without losing my virginity.
>>36197009
Go get drunk at a party women are huge sluts when drunk
Just do it, faggot. We don't give a shit.
Sage.
>31 year old virgin
>Don't even want to have sex
I literally don't see the appeal, I could just fap and be done with it, instead of wasting my time and money on trying to get some girl to have sex with me
>never be told what to do
>not playing the Jew's game
>watching nature for hours
>relying on yourself
>sense of satisfaction
Is the woodland hermit life the best life?
>>36196947
innawoods life is best life
do you hunt by any chance?
>>36196969
I wish I could. I wish I had woodlands around me. Our country destroyed it all.
This is more a fantasy/getting into thread.
Any tips?
I wish it was always summer and I had enough money to do it for more than a few months per year
Rate this pizza
>>36196897
mr. p's is better
Only for those who really want a party
>>36196897
Like a 2 dude. It's like cardboard with chalky cheese, gristle-esq pepperoni and sauce that taste more like thick salsa.
Well robots, whyyyyy aren't you married yet? And you can't says looks or autism
>>36196814
looks and autism
>>36196814
Because im only 19
But faggot, looks and autism are what ARE keeping me from finding a wife.
>manlet
>dicklet
>chinlet
>wristlet
>voicelet
>brainlet
>personalitylet