Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6111. page

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>finally eat 800 calories after several tries
>super hungry
>go to the store to pick up some more Diet Pepsi
>on the way I drive by a Pizza Hut
>stop at a red light and stare in the window
>see all the people eating their pizza
>it's probably hot and fresh
>I can imagine going there and eating all the pizza I want at the buffet
>before I know it I'm at the Pizza Hut ordering a Diet Pepsi and the buffet
>have 9 breadsticks, 13 slices of pepperoni pizza and 4 desert breadsticks
D-does it ever end?

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Haven't posted on 4chan for years. Figured it was time to write some shit down.

>Be me
>22, lost virginity at 16, had three serious girlfriends, but single for four years at this point.
>Am an avid gamer and a /fit/izen, friends mostly live quite far away so use Discord to communicate mostly.
>Know a girl that lives on the other side of the world from gaming, she's pretty cool. (Murrican chick, 4'11", brunette, beautiful green eyes.)
>See some depressing Facebook posts.
>ask her what's going n
>She broke up with her ex, he was abusive towards her. Kicked her out of the hosue. She lives with her parents now.
>Whiteknight the shit out of her, try to make her feel better. Share my steam account with her through steam family share to give her 300 new games.
>She's happy, calls me a really nice guy.
>We keep talking on Facebook messenger, even deep into the night etc.
>Flirting happens.
>Tell her I think she's cute but I don't do long distance.
>We both understand, it never works anyway.
>We keep talking daily, even invite her into my friend's discord.
>She starts getting really cute and needy, hearts in almost every message.
>calls me perfect, lolno. Am about a 7/10 at best.
>we laugh at each others jokes. pretty obvious we would be dating at this point if it wasn't for the distance.
>suggest I come visit her in America for a holiday.
>She's excited about the idea.
>a few months later, still talking on a daily basis, lots of flirting and nudes traded.
>stay in america with qt, first night had 0 hours of sleep, fucking non-stop.
>stay for 2 months, basically a real couple by now, super clingy and cute, have gaming setups next to each other, amazing sex.
>Have to move back.
>Heartbreaking goodbye, feels empty and lonely on the way home.
>feel depressed when I get home, from facebook messages I can tell she's depressed as well, not being together anymore.
Cont.

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So I've met a real life gril on fetlife who I believe is just as autistic as I am. She's into DDLG and the same age as me, I would give anything to be her daddy and just to be able to feel like a protector again. What do you guys think, you think she's cozying up to me, or she's telling me to back off in a socially acceptable way? Pic is her, will post our convos once I've blurred out our names and my pics

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Most females on here like skinny guys.. I feel like i'm the only one who likes muscular guys...

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/r9k/ is full of inane bullshit. Let's talk about shitty birds.

This species of flying asshole is called a spoonbill. It is one of ugliest birds on the planet and spends all its time walking around in shallow water, stinking and being ugly. Not only that but it makes a noise that sounds like someone letting air out of a balloon.

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Who else here only has fun at games when cheating?

I use Iniuria for csgo. It's fairly good for legit, and rage isn't too bad.

Pic not related, those aren't my settings. Just a random pic off Google.

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Would you get in a relationship with a girl who is highly autistic?

Pic related

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>be me
>post phone number on here for a laugh
>some guy phones
>he lives in the same city as me
>speak for half an hour
>he's pretty chill
>gives me some life advice, some potential routes to escape to normiehood
>He calls again the next day
>"what's up" "how's it going" all that stuff
>I'm at the shop
>asks me to pick him up some stuff and drop it off as I'd be driving past his place anyway
>"sure why not"
>he tells me where he lives
>I go to the street, as I'm approaching some creepy guy in an old tracksuit is staring at me
>I've told him what I'm wearing, if that's him he'll stop me
>as soon as I walk past he runs inside
>I get a text
>"You walked right past me"
>ok so it is him, don't know what I was expecting
>I buzz his flat to get in and he opens the door
>as soon as I step in I realise wtf I'm doing and freeze
>consider running away
>I'm wearing motorcycle gear with armour plating and boots with steel round the edges, if he tries anything I should be ok
>step in and dump his stuff
>he invites me to sit down
>has one of those beds that stands up against the wall, but it's down
>"yeah that's usually up"
>redflag.jpg
>chat for about 10 minutes, he's ok, kind of spergy but then again what would you expect?
>I found it a little weird how he kept telling me I'm attractive
>"I need to ask you if something is gay"
>"ok?"
>"Is it gay to dress up like a girl for the amusement of other guys?"
>pic related
>"yep, that's pretty gay"
>"Is that the sort of thing you're into? Maybe I could go put it on, I look way better as a girl"
>suddenly realise why the bed is down
>he wants to dress up like a girl and have me fuck him
>P I C R E L A T E D
>got out of there as fast as I could
>jumped on motorbike, away within three seconds
>ran three red lights on the way home

I honestly don't know what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn't that

He's probably reading this. I think I'm going to die. ;~;

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Any other former trump supporters unironically disappointed with drumpf?

I can't even discuss it on pol without them accusing me of being a shareblue shill and some idiot mouthing off the "nuclear codes" copypasta

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GET OUT LITTLE BROTHER, I'M TAKING A SHIT!!

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Does this make you insecure femanons?

You will never have this kind of body

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Let's see how many normies are out there.

You must post in this thread if you woke up this morning next to someone you care about.

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How's that youtube channel coming along robots?

Check out mine

https://youtu.be/prq4_0T-I8g

Feedback welcom

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>getting laid is easy, bro!
>girls are slutty and tindr exists

girls only fuck Chad through tinder.

http://www.girlsaskguys.com/sexual-behavior/a22977-girls-on-tinder-do-smash-a-lot

>240 of 300 girls had sex through tinder, while less than 50 of 300 men had sex through tinder

if you're not in the top 15% of men genetically speaking, then women are simply not interested in you. Why should they be, when they can fuck men who are superior to you in every way at the tap of a button?

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Why do feminists try to pretend women's sex drives are just as high as men's and that they are just as perverted and watch as much porn?