Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 450. page

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Why do people fall in love with ToucanGirl over and over?

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>there are homeless people out there who can get laid
>there are LITERAL autists who aren't virgins out there
>there are fat, unemployed UGLY people who still aren't virgins

Yet YOU can't get laid?

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>freshman highschooler
>get on bus
>some whale sits next to me
>lean head against window and look out of the window
>"hi my name is (forgot name)"
>she sticks her hand out to shake
>im forced to shake her hand and i just say my name and look back out window
>so, what grade are you i-"
>mfw this bitch is still talking
>too beta to tell her to stop so i reluctanty answer her questions
>this fat bitch tries to get my number but i say i forgot it
>give her a lethal dose of morphine instead
>thought she would only sit there once
>bitch does it again the next day
>mfw she was too fat for the dosage
>after that they i just zoom to the back of the bus to hide

>gp asks if im still taking my prozac
>"yes but its not working"
>See her giggling slightly under her breath
>i'm sorry, did you say that you are still taking the prozac?
>y-yes
>she cant hold in her laughter any longer
>calls other doctors into the room
>her spit literally hitting me in the face she is laughing so hard
>Doctors arrive
>she screams "He fell for the prozac meme!" at them
>some doctors look away in disgust, others glare angrily at me
>"i-i dont understand"
>one doctor pushes me off my chair
>hear one spit on my back
>get thrown out the back exit into the trash
>tears streaming down my face
>still hear laughter from outside the window
>stretch myself to look through the window
>she asks the doc for antidepressants
>he gives her a lethal dose of morphine instead

I had the last laugh.

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Did I make modern art or did I just assemble some pieces of trash in pic related? Really making the thinking...

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I think we all know the answer to this, right?

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>tfw have to put "single" when filling out i-9s and applications

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>google owns the biggest search engine in the world
>buys out youtube the second biggest search engine
>responsible for 98% of internet traffic
>can't make a captcha that works perfectly
>it's literally like elementary grade shape matchcing

what did they mean by this? this is literally my 20th try trying to post this because it keeps saying the captcha is wrong after making me click like 50 of them (all of which i got right)

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>parents told me to unload dishwasher last night
>purposely not do it
>they ask me about it in the morning
>just say i forgot and then do it later in the day whenever i want
who else feeling /mischievous/ today?

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>hand falls asleep
>can't feel with it
>start touching face to simulate gf

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>Little sister comes into my room
>Sister: Anon, dinner's ready
>Me: Okay, I'll be down in a sec
>Sister: Anon, have you been drinking? You sound really rough
>I haven't touched a drop of alcohol all day

I can't be the only one who knows this feel r-right?

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>normie tells me something im not even paying attention to
>awkward shrug
>"What do you mean you don't know?"

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>social engineer called me
>i was stupid and got tricked into giving out my date of birth
What can they do with it? How fucked am I?

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I DON'T WANNA LIVE NO MO'
SOMETIMES I HEAR DEATH KNOCKING IN MY FRONT DO'
I'M LIVING LIKE A HUSTLE
ANOTHER DRUG IN JUGGLE
ANOTHER DAY ANOTHER STRUGGLE

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u ok hun?xx

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Why is AMD so shit?