Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3162. page

>>38146108
fembot here. i absolutely agree with you op!! this shit needs to stop.

>Thinks he is a robot
>Isn't 5'2
>Isn't a satanist
>has any shred of hope in any regard

Wew bucko.

File: IMG_0195.jpg (942KB, 2000x2000px) Image search: [Google]

942KB, 2000x2000px

>>38146121
Typical slut. Making fun of me.

File: firmhandshakeman.jpg (40KB, 612x408px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 612x408px

>>38146061
"Son, it's all about looking them in the eye, standing up straight, and giving a nice, firm handshake. It's as simple as that."

Man I've read so much shit about talking to girls on the net that I come off as a perfectly cool guy on my first interaction with them most of the time.

It's a struggle to not say anything 4chan tier retarded, though.

this is obviously the most shitty advice that normal people give you, but it is the truth...

just talk to people. you need to practice to get good at, the same goes for everything.

I used to stutter when even talking to my parents because of anxiety and being a shut in neet. then I got a job as a phone salesman and after talking to people on the phone so much for the last 12 months, talking is nothing.

of course talking to a girl after being a neet is hard, but at least i don't feel SUPER uncomfortable doing it

you go op! I believe in you!

File: IMG_2003.jpg (98KB, 750x559px) Image search: [Google]

98KB, 750x559px

>wanting to watch roasties do things to relax

No thanks, chad

Is this what girls sound like?

I've actually forgotten

File: stock-photo-portrait-of-a-man-from-above-with-headphones-and-smartphone-in-bed-232522546.jpg (473KB, 1500x1100px) Image search: [Google]

473KB, 1500x1100px

>>38146013
>watch

only 5% of the time

File: e16092edd87402bf6079b745530a864109e6d989.png (654KB, 960x1024px) Image search: [Google]

654KB, 960x1024px

I can cum just massaging my anus.

the prostate is a fucking meme. i mean yeah it feels alright and gets me rock hard instantly but putting stuff in your asshole just isnt worth it.

>>38145940
I've done it a number of times using a dildo, both with and without wearing a chastity cage. It personally feels better while wearing a cage.

Either way I feel like a huge faggot afterwards but I can't stop now since it feels so much better than cumming normally.

Fembot here!
>M
>21-28
>Doesn't matter, as long as not shorter than me. (I'm 5'2)
>doesn't matter, as long as not obese
>caucasian/mixed
>Outgoing, energetic. Witty and devious.
>Vidya, metal music, bdsm, cosplay

alright, lets do this
first to the sausage party

Ideal gf:
>Robot F or M, to begin with
F
>Age
under 22
>Height
under 160cm
>Weight
average for her height, or under
>Race or nationality
White
>Personality
Needy, clingy, dependent on me, useless without me, autistic, submissive, affectionate, no dress-sense, wants me to teach her things, wants me to protect her, not the least bit lefty/sjw
>Interests
Reading, crafts, art, outdoors, rural lifestyle
no/small interest in vidya, no drugs, non-mainstream taste in music

>>38146225
>that personality section

I'm 34 and the only girls i found fitting that description are traps.

File: 01396938b9910e7ff96042831ff84885aca0cdf0b9ac362491b835fe7bee1a3a.jpg (73KB, 1214x1140px) Image search: [Google]

73KB, 1214x1140px

>make typo
>flee thread
>get curious
>some dude is fucking pissed that I made a typo and they are calling me all sorts of names

File: 1487970566953.jpg (70KB, 559x836px) Image search: [Google]

70KB, 559x836px

>>38145849
>>38145883
there are actually people that are THIS insecure, even on an anonymous board? holy fuck.

>>38145883
You shoudn't feel bad

Why do you keep doing this to yourself, Anon?

File: sad pepe.jpg (13KB, 353x352px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 353x352px

>>38145818
i wish i knew dude

oregano

>>38145804
>>wanked
fuck off poo in loo

>it's a "dealer fucks your boipucci episode"

>>38145791
>its a "dealer borrows your car and gets it impounded by the police" episode

wow what a great thread, OP, you fucking nigger

>>38145747
This could be easily flipped. Why do all of the 5/10 and under men want 10/10 Stacey? It's just the way things are.

>>38145766
Roasti detected. GTFO.
>>38145747
Because they DO have a chance. A 8/10 Chad WILL cumdump them

>>38145766
>This could be easily flipped
No it can't, that's the point. A 3/10 roastie can get Chad, a 3/10 robot will never get Stacy.

>>38145688
>give him a firm handshake
I can look people in the eye but i can never do this
fuck all normies, i hate to grip people

Reminder that you cannot be a robot if you have a good relationship with your father.

Fuck off dad, I can get by fine with your money.

>>38145672
Pay income tax and threaten/assault brown people

>>38146299
I do one of those how do I pay income tax if I don't get income tho

>>38146327
Get a job, your country runs on capitalism and contributing your labor and eventually part of the financial fruit of your labor back to your government is the best way to give back to your country.

>>38145621
"Complaining about Nazis proves that you are a Nazi, too. Just a failed one. Everyone, by definition, is a normalfag."

See how retarded you sound?

Saged this faggot b8 post.

>hugged a girl a year ago
Does this mean I'm a normalfag?

>>38145621
Does /qst/ and /tg/ have, like, text based monopoly?

How young, and how rich?

How do you even meet these girls that you _____

If you had no regrets, you wouldn't be here begging for attention.

>>38145628
I have rich parents with good business and I live on my own house with swimming pool where I usually bring underage girls to ____.

We have some business related to making birthday parties so many parents come to me to organize and they usually trust me and have high confidence because I look young and serious. Sometimes I use drugs sometimes I just flirt with them till they consent.
Might try out boy once if I find cute one

>>38145647
I don't I say this before any normal fag starts guilt tripping me that what I do is wrong, I am just answering question for people who are interested in my lifestyle .

Is that guy on the bottom left supposed to be the dude from watchmen that kills millions to save billions

File: 1436759228880.jpg (22KB, 375x450px) Image search: [Google]

22KB, 375x450px

>white people are the superior race
>they're somehow constantly outwitted by "inferior" races like Jews and are constantly under threat from dark skinned people
something just doesn't add up...

>>38145588
>how do you feel about the white genocide robots?
Who cares? Only retarded racists care about that.

>>38145526
>Well, just dropping by to say goodbye. There's nothing left for me in this world. I will soon be at peace. See you on the other side, robots.
WAIT
Can I have your money

>>38145526
Quitting /r9k/ or committing suicide?

>>38145540
I've already spent all of it, so no.