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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1876. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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Any hard hitting, tobacco smoking niggas on tonight?
51 posts and 12 images submitted.
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>>38534486
Smoking will give you cancer eventually and it's unsightly.
>>
>>38534505
Death is always unsightly. Doesn't matter what you die from.
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>>38534576
unless it's a space death then it will be perfection.

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How am I supposed to buy cigs? They're always out of reach so I'd have to actually ask for then, but I'm too socially inept to do it, even though I'm legally able to buy them.
12 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38534474
>"hey, can I get a pack of [insert cigarette brand here]?"
Then the cashier will grab it for you, tell you the amount and whatnot and just pay it and leave. Just practice saying that one sentence over and over so that will be the only thing you have to say.
>>
>>38534474
are you retarded anon?
You're not even able to speak to a cashier?
So how do you pay and stuff
>>
>>38534474
Write a note that says "I am mute. I would like one pack of [insert your brand here] please," and hand it to the cashier.

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HOW DO NORMIES READ THIS BOOK IT'S SO LONG AND BORING. I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT AT ALL.

REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
23 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38534454
>normies read Atlas Shrugged

come back when you've sorted yourself out bucko
>>
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Become a real patrician OP. Read this shit.
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>>38534454
>normie
Only edgy teens read that crap

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Who here /comfy/?
>large fleece blanket
>dim light
>4chan
>radiohead playing in low volume
>warm ramen noodles
7 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>blanket
>mini brownies
>pizza
> dark room lit only by monitor glow
quite comfy desu
>>
>don't own a blanket, sheets haven't been changed in a year
>pitch black except dusty dirty monitor
>4chan is shit and full of normies and propaganda bait threads
>electroacoustic improvisation playing at 1000% volume
>no food left in house except for a fortune cookie from old chinese takeout
>>
>>38534678
>4chan is shit and full of normies and propaganda bait threads
>stays on 4chan

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>desperately want a relationship and some connection in life
>meet a girl; girl shows attraction to me
>instantly feel uncomfortable and uneasy
>focus only on their flaws
>lose interest

Am I the only one this shit happens to?
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
It happens to me too.

I really think I've lost the ability to feel love and affection because I've been abused and isolated for most of my life.

What do you think it is?
>>
>be me
>also desperately wants a meaningful relationship and connection to someone on a very deep level
>5'6", never gonna happen
>girl who's nice to everyone is also nice to me
>cant help ig and get all sorts of daydreams about having very happy fulfilling relationship with her

pls end me
>>
>>38534410
>Am I the only one this shit happens to?
It didn't work for my oneitis who I'm still hopelessly obsessed with. It did work for two other girls who seemed to show interest it in me for a little bit.

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This is going to be my last day of 4chan.

I've been here since 2008 and it's time to move on. this place has become nothing but a cycle of destructive behavior and thought patterns. I know that 4chan doesn't create robots but this is the worst place for us to come. it reinforces absolutely everything negative about you and blows it out of proportion. literally doing anything is better than coming here. play video games all day if you want.

even if shitposting is occasionally fun the general toxic attitude of everything being shit that exists on 4chan does affect your psyche. if you don't believe me, take a week or two off completely and return to any board and see just how they see absolutely everything in a negative light.

people here might share your same struggles. and there's catharsis in that. but you're much better off not coming here
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38534400
see you tomorrow.

non-original comment, you can't stop me.
>>
>>38534400

Smart choice desu. I hope you find more happiness without this board.
>>
>>38534464
It is possible. I've previously gone two months before and it's worth it. 4chan is highly addictive but with enough willpower it can be done

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>Be ugly as dirt
>Be short
>Have small dick
>Racist
>Hates women
>Finds gore and people being severely hurt amusing
>No compassion
>Selfish
>Bitter
>Literally human filth, then yet still thinks he deserves pussy


This entire board is a meme and deserves to be shut down again.
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
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nuke the middle east.
>>
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>>38534392
>>Be ugly as dirt
>>Be short
>>Racist
>>Hates women
>>No compassion
>>Literally human filth, then yet still thinks he deserves pussy

I'm all of these except I have a really big dick. How short am I? I'm 5'5, voted for Trump, want all illegals deported, hate niggers and I know women will be replaced by sex robots in the future and I STILL HAVE A GF. In fact, I might dump her for a younger, qt'er girl because my current gf is too clingy.
>>
>>38534392
not as bad as /b/ tho

Lonely? Come join the oldest running robot discord

discord /VPS3hp

No women, non-virgins, redditfags or gays. We play vidya, talk philosophy, technology, music, shitposting, poltiics and much more.
44 posts and 19 images submitted.
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A haven for true robots. Finally somewhere free of degenerate traps and poopdick orbiters and of insufferable roasties and their faggot orbiters. The true spirit of robotdom lives here.
>>
>>38534328
WOO WOOO WOOO WOOOOO
>>
we all prefer dubbed anime over subtitles

I'm new to greentext and I have no clue what I'm doing but here goes

>Be me 15
>go to run down boarding school out in the sticks
>meth dealers practically live around the campus
>I go to workprogram every year I've been kinda nice at times but still pretty shit
>me and my roommates are edgelords, one of them only listens to pink season over and over while the other is the butt of all our jokes
>go to lunch break
>fuckmylife volunteers are visiting
>a whole church visits our school one at a time. pretty much there's always some old fuckers walking around without a clue of what they're doing
>Butt of jokes sits down and tells me that while he was going to work there was some guy with his mom
>says that he thought the guy was making some stupid voice while he was talking to his mom
>he tells me that when he turned the corner he started laughing
>mfw he tells me that the fucker was autistic
>he points to the potato while in the dining hall
>Mother fucker was over there playing with his fat rolls and saying "DEEP" over and over
>His mom started to just glare at us while we where in line trying to put our dishes away while doing our absolute hardest to not laugh at her son screaming the war cry of the potato
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>>38534319
I enjoyed this greentext.
It was a little bit too long and the ending wasn't as great as I hoped it would be but overall I think this greentext deserves solid 7/10.
Good job.
>>
>>38535068
Thank you, I will work on it and do better next time
>>
>>38534319
>15
>listening to an album that came out this year
HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM really made me think OP

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What do you guys usually get from Burger King? Thinking of hitting them up
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
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i usually just get a cup of water than stare at all the fat people for a few minuets and feel superior for being skinny even though the only reason im skinny is because im depressed and dont have enough energy to eat.
>>
>>38534241
Their cheeseburgers are better than McDonald's. They have a decent dessert selection, minus the ice cream and shakes. If it's spicy, it's probably good. If you want to eat bad-tasting memes, try their veggie burger.
>>
>>38534241
Chicken tendies my dude :)

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So I have Wardawg in the palm of my hand atm. What should I have him do on live stream for our entertainment? Anytime I tell him to stream he will.

If you don't know Wardawg he's the streamer who got banned from twitch for cutting a girls name into his arm and being swatted...plus for smoking meth, burning/destroying shit, sticking pens up his ass, etc.

What should I make him do for our entertainment? I'm giving you guys a gift desu.
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>38534202
I want to watch him poo poo
>>
>>38534226
>>38534226
Taken but he'll do that regardless
>>
Average Wardawg stream

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGuXmkhl4p8

wardawg.stream/videos/skype/burns_armpit_hair_1.html

http://wardawg.stream/videos/twitch/pen_in_ass_1.html

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You think your life is fucking hard? Think you had bad luck? Fuck off. You don't know shit. You haven't been fucked over as many times as I have. Virgin manlets.

> Be me
> Be born into family of ultra conservative jihadists
> Decide, fuck this, I want to be Amerikkans
> Get out of home schooling in 2nd grade and go to public school
> Meet cute girls, make friends, hang out with nerdy kids but am friends with basically everyone
> Generally, life is nice when I'm away from home
> Turn 13
> Get sexually abused one cold December evening
> Freak out, give up on life, struggle to speak or do anything for 5 years
> Get diagnosed with degenerative spine condition at 14
> Get bullied for being a sand nigger and almost raped again in the mouth by football players
> Graduate, go to shit state school
> Decide fuck it I'm going to go all out and put my life together or die
> End up getting some mentors who believe in me and date the prettiest girls and become very successful
> Get all A's and graduate Summa cum Laude
> Build multi-million dollar company by accident
> Get interviewed by New York Times at age 21
> Generally successful and friends look up to me
> At age 22, decide I deserve to go on vacation and go with friends to Santa Barbara for a week with the roasties
> Borrow friend's skeezy surfer cousin's swim trunks
> Get medically resistant staph infected on left ass cheek
> Ignore it for a few months but it keeps getting bigger and end up having surgery
> Doctors botch surgery and leave chunks of the dead tissue in my body, and overdose me on antibiotics destroying my intestines
> Lose job, spend the next 9 months laying in bed waiting for stomach to heal
> Spinal condition deteriorates, friends abandon me, I graduate college Summa cum Laude but inconspicuously. Cut no longer heal, spots remain on skin forever.
> Graduate, try to get a job in tech based on my business experience.
> Almost 8 months into 2017, unemployed, friendless, pathetic
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Should I just kill myself? God genuinely hates me. Found out today some chad-like manlet got married and has been working at Adobe for a year and a half, and he's my age, has a degree in Sociology and zero experience. His dad is the sysadmin for the local school district, and is Indian, so unlike my degenerate parents probably helped him out.
>>
>>38534204
that or stop posting, makes no difference on this end
>>
You have degree and experience and supposedly the skills and brains to back it up, that's more than what most losers around here have. Hang in there.

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>the captcha freezes
7 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>38534119
this new feature is fucking annoying, never used to happen
>>
>>38534119
legacy captcha or bust
it's an obvious scheme to bilk saps into 4chan gold memberships
>>
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>>38534119
Bump so maybe someone fixes it?

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POSSIBLE TRIGGERS! It's the third day that i'm fighting with this addiction and trying to do nofap. I'm close to surrendering. I'll be very explicit. All my thoughts are about big black cocks that i want to suck deeper. I want to be fucked. I'm a sissy. Please help me, bros... i'm crying.
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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nofap is overrated
https://www.tfgamessite.com/play.php?id=530
>>
Cheer up, friend. Do nofap long enough and your desires will continue getting darker and more depraved until you finally work up the courage to fulfill you sissy dreams.
>>
>>38534095
>Addicted to Sissy Porn

kys!

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I'MMA FUCK YO BITCH NIGGA, I'MMA FUCK YOUR HO NIGGA
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>>38534092
This is the 8th most cancerous thing I've read today thank you
>>
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This board has really gone downhiII.
>>
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>>38534092
I DRIP ON YOUR BITCH LIKE WATER
I SPLASH ON YOUR BITCH WITH THE WATER

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