A girl is coming over to my house to meet my parents in two hours.
How do I not make this awkward?
>>34035513
Tell your parents to be real fucking chill, dont bring out the baby pics, or make any embarrassing jokes, or say "so when are yall getting married", make sure the place is looking real nice and smells good, air freshner and/or candle, make sure you take a shit if you have to. Just be real cool and mellow, if this girl means anything to you, then you should be comfortable with her, and already have a deep spiritual rapport, that could not be disturbed by anything your parents could possibly do,
>>34035513
Inevitably going to be awkward
>>34035513
What are the activities planned? Lunch? Dinner? Just sit around talking? Bringing her to your room, has she ever been to your house before? Tell your parents not to grill her. Just friendly convo, tell them if there are any sensitive topics like not to ask about her parents if they died 5 days ago. Just good vibes all around, ya feel me?
>Start talking to a girl from /r9k/
>Don't want to be clingy but keep worrying she's talking to other guys whenever she's not talking to me
How do I leep her all to myself?
>>34035489
*keep, not leep
What I get for phoneposting
>>34035489
Give her to me since you're too much of a beta to keep her
you need to trap and eat her, my fellow hunter gatherer.
>tfw you lie to your doctor about being sexually active to save yourself the embarrassment
>>34035467
Don't lie to your doctor you fucking idiot.
He is the one person you should never lie to under any circumstances.
this is why you're a virgin in the first place
stop being such an insecure faggot
>>34035516
I gleefully let everyone I'm a virgin because it's a good talking point and nobody respects me anyway.
gf when
Just took a shit and checked to find out that I bled out my asshole so much. I know for a fact i have hemorrhoids but ive never bleeded this much. I dont wanna go to the doctor cause i dont know whats gonna go on and dont want them seeing my disgusting shit caked hairy asshole. anyone been through this or know what i should do
>>34035459
bump
Origininoali
This has happened to me a couple of times, but usually 6+ months apart. I was worried I had ass cancer, but I still haven't seen a doctor.
>do you care about living
yes? go see a doctor, tough shit
no? ignore it and hope it goes away
my nose has been bleeding every day for a week now, ignoring it, hoping it goes away or I suffer a deadly aneurysm or something good
Any robots in the military?
I'm considering joining in a year or two (The Australian one anyway but I suppose it doesn't make much difference).
Do you miss out on much if you go this route? Doesn't seem like I'd have the opportunity to get a gf and a social life if I joined.
Also the lack of privacy is a concern for me. Perhaps i could get over it i dunno.
>>34035455
Honestly I've been thinking about it. Know a guy in the military, talked with me a bit about it. Basically from what I've heard from him is that they fuck you over hard. He hates his time when he's on the job. But afterwards, he enjoyed the experience of it. Would like to hear what other anons say about it.
Not in it but also planning on joining the military. I've got a entrance test on the 15th of Feb. Hoping on becoming a naval officer.
Go luck in you're endeavour op!
>>34035520
>they fuck you over hard
im sure it's worth it to be stronger and feel like a badass in the end.
i've wanted to join ever since playing hm2, as stupid as that sounds
>>34035535
good luck anon
It's fucking freezing edition.Misaki don't forget your 12 minutes of exercise special edition
Need to get a haircut today. Fucking hate it
>>34035465
How long is your hair?
I'm scared of people holding sharp things near my head so I tend to stay silent while I focus on him fucking my hair up or cutting my ear or something.
>>34035542
Not especially, but it's insanely thick so once I get beyond 3 weeks it's totally unmanageable and I look ridiculous
>some faggot anon calls you out on your spelling or grammar mistakes
>pretend you're polish
>they buy it every time
>some faggot anon calls you out on being Polish
>pretend to be a dumb nigger
>every time, it works
>some faggot anon calls you out on being black
>pretend to be Polish
>every time it works
> some calls you a faggot anon
> pretends polands
> he's a NIGGER
Anyone one else working on lowering their standards to finally get a gf? You might think think yours are at rock bottom already, but trust me you can go lower. I'm aiming at downie girls myself currently.
>>34035413
I have a baseline. I know what I'm worth.
>lowered myself all the way to a girl who didn't shave at all. ever. anywhere.
>had a mustache
>could stand it for a whole week
>stopped talking to her entirely
it just ain't worth it. for a little while you're happy you're not alone, then reality sets in.
i merely just feel worse about myself
For some reason plain but dumb girls turn me on
But I don't wanna be that guy who takes advantage of borderline retards
Besides, they're probably taken already since they're easy targets
Embrace your darkness, never be ashamed
Does this mean that I can finally purposely shit myself and then walk around in public for sexual pleasure without feeling any shame?
I agree, BE AUTISTIC BE CRAZY DO THE FUCK YOU ARE FOR REAL
>>34035399
>still thinking about darkness on the sexual level
a primitive being you are
Does having depression mean I'm weak minded?
Regardless of my accomplishments, why do I feel like a god damn failure all the time?
>>34035327
yes, fix it or die.
you hate yourself because you define yourself by your failures and celebrate them with masturbation.
>>34035337
Why am I depressed then? Is it because I've never been intimate with a girl?
Do you really need intimacy and relationships with women to be healthy? I thought it was possible to go through life perfectly fine without sex and dating.
>>34035327
No
It can, but it doesn't by necessity. Are you depressed by the things that you want to depress you or the things that you feel "should", or are you depressed because of something else?
>"come one anon,come flex with us!"
>those kids are gonna die an early death
>all because their parents wanted them to be buff as shit because
lol
>>34035302
I bet even that little kid could beat the shit out of me
>>34035322
Why would they die an early death?
>>34035302
Holy fuck those abs in the middle
>tfw wasn't able to get financial aid last semester (Dad doesn't do his taxes, so they couldn't verify his income)...Had to pay out of my savings and ended up getting evicted as a result because they told me I'd be able to get financial aid -_-
>finally saved enough to go to college this term
>look to register for classes, everything is full
Fuck.
>>34035296
Were you able to go to college last semester or did you decide to not go because you couldn't get financial aid?
Why doesn't your dad do his taxes
wtf ive seen this thread before. what are you doing?
>>34035394
Yeah I went to college last semester
>>34035778
Meant to post it in a uni thread.
>Okay Anon, you ready to learn how to drive a stick?
>implying Chad would offer that to us
>>34035291
That guy's face pisses me off
that's the quintessential punchable face
>>34035352
>>34035357
Take a closer look at that pic anons. Hint he's got his "stick" out.
How's life and the day treating you, /r9k/?
>haven't worked in half a year
>haven't taken classes since this time last year
>only earn money by occasionally doing freelance writing assignments
>leave the house but twice or thrice per week, mainly to smoke cigarettes with friends or eat junk food
>drank a bottle of vodka by myself last night
>went to bed at 6am and woke up around noon
>talked over WhatsApp to a friend for an hour, sat in bed, stared at the walls, and then slept again until 7pm
>woke back up and watched funny YouTube videos
>drove to the store to get donuts and a root beer
>it's 3:17am and may as well be the middle of the day for me
>will go to bed in another two or three hours and wake up around 1 or 2pm
>tfw this is my life
>tfw I sleep and eat at the same time as people in New Delhi and Beijing
>tfw won't be taking classes again until September and have no desire to get a minimum wage job and mop floors or mop burgers
Considering becoming a truck driver for a year, but that sounds like a miserable lifestyle.
b-b-b-b-b-bumps
>>34035269
>Listen to music 4-6 hours a day
>Brother lost my headphone buds
>Won't admit it
>Balding
>Dad sleeping downstairs away from mom for a week
>Always wanted to learn to skate
>Afraid of looking like a jackass
>Pajeet offspring
>Wanna get in shape again
>Lack of music gives me anxiety and I stress eat
One of these fuckin days
>>34035421
Have you tried using Rogaine yet, senpai?
Is pic related spot on?
>>34035268
Was that written by someone here?
>virginity anal rapists abusers bad people
???
>>34035268
I don't think it's so much about me comparing myself with other people, I simply yearn for intimacy.