How can you convince a girl to suck your cock?
>>34441477
if I knew, do you think I would be here?
Make her laugh. And use reverse psychology. She'll do it because she WANTS to do it.
25$-2000$ depending on where you live and the girls atractiveness
As a patient, I mean.
How'd you end up there and what was it like?
>How'd you end up there
drugs/schizophrenia
>what was it like?
fucking boring. boring as fuck. some of the other patients were interesting/cool, though.
at least you can try and convince the nurses to give you the good drugs to pass the time.
>>34441450
Yeah I have.
I tried to commit suicide by carbon monoxide poisoning with a car in a closed garage and my best friend found me before I was dead, dragged me out into the fresh air, and called 911/ambulance. I tried to lie about what happened but my 16 year old self couldn't convince anyone it was an accident. So I spent 7 months in a mental hospital. I was fine when I got out and was on meds for my mental shit and I'm fine now (now 24). Just a little depressed occasionally and anxious more than occasionally, but nothing I can't handle with my xanax prescription.
As for what it was like, I and a guy I met there who was only a year older and I'm for the same thing were the two most normal people there, we stuck together because everyone else were really crazy. It was, interesting I guess.
At first I hated it
But then I started waking up feeling pretty good because the nurses at least pretended to want to see me
Are drugs especially those like psychedelics useful or just a meme to trick me into hurting myself?
They're useful. Take dissociatives though they're more robot-friendly
>>34441313
Its a little of both
They are harmful if you do them a lot but if you are smart about your dosing and SPACE THAT SHIT OUT then you will be fine
>In this day and age.. I heard this from a wise wizard on here.. EVERYTHING IS A MEME
Don't forget this.. drop some acid, have a good time don't be a faggot about it don't try to like impress your friends, actually take something from it
Drugs will make your dick fall off then you go to hell. Not DEA btw
What is this bump? Is it herpes??
Skin tag, harmless. Or cancer
>>34441228
I had a couple of those the other day. It's an underground pimple. For some reason when you get acne on your junk it doesn't form a head until it's super swollen, and it will probably hurt or be sore for a while before it actually is ready to pop. Mine took about a week to pop.
It's about the size of a pea. I have squeezed it before but nothing came out.
I'm going to be heading to college soon , what should I be expecting?
>also , tips for surviving college pls
Which college my mans?
>>34441213
you should expect not to see whats in your pic. Only chads see that.
It's pretty much just like highschool except some people might live on campus
What did you eat today?
>I had in the morning, tortillas (uncooked-cooked), eggs.
>In the noon I ate McDonalds double cheeseburgers while I studied
>For dinner I ate a few grilled cheese sandwiches, more tortillas, a few pieces of bacon and now just finished off 4 donuts from the nearby donut store
I already got diarrhea, feels good man
Hard boiled egg (80 cals)
Skinless chicken breast and mixed vegetables (550 cals)
1 steak and cheese pie from the servo. That's all I'll eat today.
>>34441106
Ausfags get out
>So, little brother, tell me about all the girls you've met at college
My sister has never asked me this since I am so fucking ugly etc. Maybe if I got in shape and stopped dressing like a 12 year old autist she'd ask me this finally. I'd probably get a little excited just from the question.
>>34440970
who is this goddess and where can i find more of her
I saved myself for the right w-woman. Mom said I should be careful of college girls.
By the way, you break up with chad? Maybe we can go on more dates like this soon?
>want to love someone and be loved
>no woman is interesting enough/they all have obvious flaws i cant accept
Ill just die alone because i dont wanna compromise
>>34440944
Goddamn you pseudoChad, I have the literal opposite problem
>want to love someone and be loved
>am semi-interesting but have way too many flaws for women to accept/hate myself for my flaws and women don't like self-loathing men
>>34440944
Yeah, yeah, something about being a sad autist and that you should love yourself, but look at that cake. It looks absolutely stunning. Definitely going to save that pic
>>34440976
Id say "work on it" but i know it doesnt depend on you. And i might be a pseudo chad, yeah, but i still feel lonely. Dates and sex is not love. And lately i dont even have sex at all because i dont want to fuck someone i dont love. Also women end up being clingy and annoying. I just want a quiet down to earth girl who doesnt have huge daddy issues and loves me. And likes some of the things i like at least. It should not be that difficult.
im so fucking depressed
just get a gf my man
>>34440924
elaborate, anon. why?
Let it go full circle. Find a place,real quiet like. Be alone with your thoughts and no one else. No internet,no nothin. Think about it,find the source and let it consume you. Turn your sadness into a weapon,a will to live and Be thankful for your depression.
>I-I'm smart when I actually get stuff done but I just don't have any motivation
You realize how shitty of an excuse this is, right? You realize that in any situation that could actually get you money this sentiment is completely worthless, right?
Don't Tell people this. Is hard enough for me to find work without a buncha autists competing with me
>tfw genuinely smart but lazy
No point in achievements or effort it's all gonna be dust one day bro.
>>34440907
ya, OP is me
that's why it is easier just to say I'm dumb
>Even if you do manage to start and stay on a path to improvement you will always have something wrong with you
>You will never have experienced your teenage and young adult years as a normal, functioning human
>By the time you are ever even worth the attention of used up roasties, they would have so many expectations for your experience and all you will be able to do is disappoint them
>But if you do nothing you will just get worse
>Your best can only be mediocre
On the good chance none of this is attained, at what age do you think is justifiable to simply give up and kill yourself/throw yourself into a downward spiral?
> just bee yourself fgt.
>>34440876
I'm starting my self-improvement drive now at 22. If it fails I'll probably start seriously considering offing myself at 25 and I'll probably do it at 30.
>>34440911
That's not a very good idea.Not testing the oregon
>tfw human interaction has gotten painful
I don't know how to talk to people anymore. I can't keep a conversation going. Every time I have to open my mouth I feel sick. I can tell you feel sick too. Your smiles and laughs are so fake. I don't want to speak. Please leave me alone. I don't have anything good to say.
>tfw oral presentation tomorrow
Why is it so hard? I want to be someone else.
i almost failed an english class in hs even tho i got perfect grades on everything except the oral presentations..
fuck that
>>34440840
Man OP, I had to do a presentation once, and I could feel the people cringing at it, it was that cringe worthy.
Today I decided to go out and try to be a normie. I went to the Starbucks nearby my neighborhood and stood in line for coffee. When I got to the front, this really pretty blonde girl was working the cash register. I tried to tell her she was really pretty when I was ordering my coffee. She started laughing and said thanks so I asked her for her number but then she said no. Then I stood there waiting for my coffee and the manager came out and told me that I was acting innapropriate. I told her that all I wanted was her number because she was nice and then she asked me to leave. Why am I failing so hard at life?
Today is my birthday robots. I love you all.
Happy birthday, friend.
:D
>>34440773
Happy birthday robot I hope it's a good one
How old faggot?
btw it doesn't get better. Happy birthday anyways.
>got a job at mcdonalds
>first day
>manager puts me in the drive-through window
>have to pass bags of food out to people who've already paid for it
>car pulls up
>fat lady in it
>she ordered a #1 combo big mac meal
>she opens up the bag before driving off
>says there's chicken nuggets in there
>take it back, manager's nearby, gets her the right bag
>apologizes for the inconvenience
>i decide to make a joke about the situation
>"i guess we got the right big mac for the big lady this time! :D"
>boss pulls me in her office
>tells me to go home for the day
God, I just fuck everything in my life up.
>>34440769
Lol that's pretty dumb
>>34440769
>>manager puts me in the drive-through window
So you're the only white person there
dumb ass lol
you goofed
Someone tell me whats going on in this thread? You have to be brazilian, or at least dutch
https://brchan.org/b/res/53050.html
>>34440766
Brazilians speak Portuguese, fucking idiot
>>34440766
> 2011
> studying in a private school
> very strange Mine, spoke to no one
> Loirinha, 1:55, wide hips, Coke-bottle glasses, nerdona face with a pimple. Normal tits. Super antisocial.
> I was soon silly in the mine. I have a crush on strange women.
I talked to her one day, the bitch did not even look at me. I think she was afraid of people.
> 2013
> Finishing school and in order to take entrance exams for Biology.
> I discover looking at cancer that the bitch does Biology.
> Add it
> Start cv on the course.
She is shy and extremely antisocial. She does not leave the house.
> I think she's cool and I'm spoiled by the baranga.
> Several nights on Skype. Always trying to get the subject to bitch.
She always accepts. But her mother always gets in the way. Limiting her hours on the internet. I think it's her family's fault to be a stranger.
I'm sending several videos to her. The bitch sees all.
>>34440766
I won't translate everything, but TL;dr: guy describes his experience fucking the ass of a fembot