Long story short I my back seat is covered in blood and shit, and need to get the seat cleaned.
I need the best cleaner I can get, the incident was just a few days ago so everything is mostly dried.
>Long story short I my back seat is covered in blood and shit
Full story please.
I don't know if I'm legally allowed honestly.
Its a long story but it was all a missunderstanding on the cops part. I don't blame them though it was a weird situation. Lucky for me they talked to my gf at the hospital and all ended well.
Is there anything that can take stains like that out of fabric?
>op choke-fucked his GF and she passed out
>he bundled her in the back seat and took off for hospital
>pulled over for speeding
>gets shot by cops for having dead girl in backseat
>amberlamps comes, she not dead, he not dead, hospital
>erryone lives, no jail, car a mess
how close am i OP?
So, are these stains from a call-girl?
Ok but its kind of emberassing. I'll give you guys a quick version but I need a product suggestion after please guys.
>me and gf having sex in the car
>decide to do anal
>pumping away she starts to get cramps
>continue only for a few minutes and she screams
>look down and shes really going crazy freaking out. Shes crying and screaming.
>look down and there is blood and shit coming out of her vagina. Yes real shit too.
>panic and dont know what to do, there is a tap at the window.
>someone heard her screaming and came over, saying they are calling the police and they have my license plate
>jump into the front and peel out of there, taking gf to hospital
>she stays over night.
>cops are at my house in the morning
>ask to see the car, see blood and shit in car, want to arrest me
>get cops to call hospital and confirm my story
>almost arrested for murder
Turned out my gf got something called a fisher, where the wall between her rectum and her vagina ruptured and blood and shit was falling out of her vagina. It was probably the worst 2 days of my life.
I'll take a swing
>OP fucking his GF on her period
>Cops pull up to lay the crackdown on OP and his underaged ass
>OP shits himself out of fear/confusion
>Girl has a panic attack
Its kinda funny I can see from your perspective but you have to remember that Ithought I almost killed my gf it was tramatic.
Mom is already saying I cant use her car again. Hopfully if I can clean it out she'll let me drive it again someday.
one time i was pumping my ex's ass real good. She had asked for anal and of course i had always loved the rare occasion when she let me in there, but this was the first time she asked me for it.
Anyways, im getting in there real nice and i start seeing like green-ish stuff on my dick. Like you know, surreal cuz her ass was white and pale from no tanning in winter. So there's this white dick into white ass and green stuff starts appearing with every stroke, a lot of contrast. I give it about 4-5 pumps until im like
>"hey i think youre pooping on me"
so i pull out and sure enough i have like fucking grass on my dick (she was a veterinarian) and it smells like shit (ya know because it is). So shes like
>"omg! im so sorry"
I run to the bathroom and wash my dick off. Bathe it in soap and germx.
>"im so embarrassed"
of course she wouldn't let me fuck her again that day ;(
try germx and soap
Thanks for the link.
They are just a light tan color, I want to say 99? corolla.
Yes it was my moms car. She made me have this long talk to her, I had to tell her everything. She knows now that her car is the only place my gf and I have sex in, and thats whats really making her mad. Plus she is uptight so shes giving me a hard time over the whole anal thing, asking if I'm gay and stuff. I don't know what to do. Thinking about buying her flowers or something to say sorry I don't know.
Ya shes in the hospital now and I don't know when shes getting out. I doub't I'll ever do anything with her like that again. The doctor said it was something thats hard to fix.
Ok I'll look into this too, thanks.
Well she was all medicated and out of it, plus she was going into surgery. Her parents were there and they were really mad. My mom was mad at me too, but I'm lucky she was there because my gf father wanted to kill me.
I turned 18 last month but I don't make very much money at gamestop.
I just don't even know what to say the whole thing was really tramatic. Like my nerves are screwed up I think I might have post tramatic stress or something.
you'll be fine. This will be hilarious to you in a few years. Hopefully you can make it up to the girl. She is way more screwed than you are. You got off pretty easy.
you definitely don't have PTSD
Yes it can happen. Bodys are weird, shit can happen.
This one time I hired a call girl with a glass eye, she asked me if I wanted her to take the glass eye out and I could have sex with her eye socket. Never heard of this before so I said sure, and it was really awesome. I finished in her eye socket, in her fucking head. And she opened her mouth and my load was in it. My load traveled through her skull and ended up in her mouth.
So yes, it can happen.
Why do faggots think there's no such thing as an actual bisexual?
We aren't confused, we aren't desperate for attention, we fully appreciate each end of both genders, hairy, soft, breasts, cock, all of it.
Well I'm sorry for getting this whole thing off topic, I'll try a few thing and try and make things right with my mom.
Won't the bleach ruin the seats? I'll try that if it'll work, does it need to be watered out?
Bleach will ruin the seats if you leave it in.
Are they cloth?
Start by removing the seat cushions and scrubbing them with water and normal soap. That should get most of the shit out.
Then move on to more drastic measures, there are plenty of chemicals good for blood.
Finishing with a good baking soda scrub should remove the smells.
Seriusly though, what car?
>Google "how to clean bood and shit out of my car"
>Get pic related
They all do it for free. Even the delivery drivers on here live more productive lives than these janitors. The janitor himself is probably gayer than a rainbow shooting out of Perez Hilton's ass.
Maybe he saved that post all for himself to jack off to later.
I guess we'll know when 3 minutes from now some anon posts asking for tips on how to clean jizz out of their mazda shitbox seats.
I'm the fudge packer you were referring to. I think we can all agree that the janitor is even more of a fag than me.
Shit, he even does it for free. At least the two guys I fuck around with buy me shit from time to time.
And for the benefit of said janitorial hero; mustangs, veyrons, miatas. There, now my post is auto-related you fucking queer.
No. The fissure wouldn't be large enough, and the anal sphincter far too tight. In the worst case scenario, the perineum would be destroyed, but a baby could never be born out of a woman's anus.
/o/, mever chsnge
Anybody got a screengrab of putting them all together?
The eyeball story, OP's 2 posts about how he told his mom and what happened with a few other posts also included, for posterity of course.
>decide to do anal
>Turned out my gf got something called a fisher, where the wall between her rectum and her vagina ruptured
That's why the vagina exists, OP. The anus was never meant to be a two-way street.
lol funny, thats how my gf describes anal.
Like a turd going backwards.
Anyways guess i'm lucky to be with a girl that likes it in the ass.
Honestly guys, use lube and ease it in and start slow.
it ain't rocket surgery.
jesus this thread doesn't stop delivering
Well your sinuses are just behind the eye and do drain into your nose and mouth.
Though I would be skeptical just for the fact that she let him cum inside her, "call girls" typically are condom only.
Never had I hoped to see a thread with this much gold on /o/ but somehow, some way here is a golden thread from a shitstained board
This is a pretty common thing op, at least for me. Best thing to do is take a blender and combine 1 cup of baking soda, 1 cup of water, and 3 black ice trees. It'll become a watery paste - brush it into the seat and then use a power buffer on it.
Should clean right up.
He admitted he made the whole thing up. basically something along the lines of
>I was watching anime in my car because I steal my neighbors wifi (or something, I forget why he said he was in his car)
>I had to shit really bad, but the car was locked
>the car doesn't unlock from the inside because of shitty aftermarket keyless entry
>so I took a dump on the back seat
>I need to get the shit stains out of my back seat because I'm picking up my sister and her friend, and I really want to fuck her friend
what? how dense are you?
Bi means attracted to both men and women. that's it.
and for the record, straight guys can like receiving butt stuff, and as long as the balls don't touch, it aint gay.
every newtrip needs a gimmick
I give you two months kid
Oh I've been around a lot longer than that. I'll allow a few guesses and then I'll reveal who I actually am.
>using the spelling fisher should have been a clue...fish...bait
I wanted to give /o/ a gift. Everyday is the same old threads, thought as I've taken an extensive break from /o/, that I could give back some fun if only for a few hours.
I'm thinking due to the negative feedback I'll just have to keep this little secret a mystery.
Now you'll never figure it out. It will eat at your very soul until the day you die. On your death bed you'll wonder "who was Benjamin Boing?" and you'll never know now. You did this to yourself, allow the question to start eatting at you....now.
Oh. You posted this before.
He fucked his girlfriend in the ass in his backseat. It opened a fistula into her vagina and she started shitting out her cunt. She screamed like a banshee, someone called the cops. OP races to the hospital and leaves her there. Cops track down OP and nearly arrest him until they call the hospital to confirm.
Bwahahahaha you'll never know.
Think about that for a minute. Something you will never, ever know. Doesn't that bother you? This entity you've been conversing with, this story you've invested in, all for nothing because you'll never figure it out.
I'm not sure if I should be laughing, or terrified. I think a bit of both.
Guess i probably won't be trying anal any time soon. GF would never forgive me if she started shitting out of her vagoo.