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You are currently reading a thread in /mu/ - Music

Thread replies: 276
Thread images: 55
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>>
>nostalgic, peaceful, thinking about the countryside.
>>
>tfw the only person who still likes you is your dog
>>
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>>52379083
>>
>>52379054
lonely and gay. just jerked off for some guy on omegle and feel really dirty
>>
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>listening to top40 pop and watching vine comps on youtube to get that vicarious sense that you're normal and enjoying things that normal people enjoy

>listening to earthmover in bed and gently rubbing your arm and neck, trying to induce the feeling that you're not lying alone in bed

>tfw 2015 is less than a week away
It's exciting and terrifying.
>>
wet socks
>>
>>52379229
this hits pretty close to home
>>
>tfw falling for slavic gf
>>
>>52379194
kinda know that feel. thought about getting a bj from a cross-dressing guy. didn't do it, but definitely thought about it.
>>
>>52379194
That's the way it goes man.
>jack off
>shit's fun
>finish
>feel ashamed to suicidal levels

I have no idea what to rec though. Giles Corey might be a good go-to or Codeine for some self loathing.
>>
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>tfw you'll never find the ideal girl in your mind because she is nothing like the real girls out there.

I feel this way.

>pic related

Any albums for this feel ?
>>
>>52379261
Not him, I'd do it if I knew them.
If it was just some random I'd chicken the fuck out.
>>
>>52379229
>tfw 2015 is less than a week away
and we'll all spend it alone
>>
>>52379290
>having such high unreachable standards that people actually fail to reach them

come on now dude
>>
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>>52379319
Nah dude I'm not spending it alone
>because I'm spending it at work ;-;
>>
>tfw you make excuses for everything and shove all your problems and weaknesses onto other people
>>
>>52379376
>never obsolete
>>
>>52379389
do you post on /pol/ perchance

stop being a shit and take some responsibility for your own failures and flaws and own you
>>
>tfw feel like your family are weird because they aren't very family-esque and seem to just co-exist more than interacting with eachother like a "normal family"
>tfw christmas is just the one day a year we eat dinner together at the table and otherwise a totally regular day, and even then it feels like just following formality and not something special
>tfw pretty sure my mother is an alcoholic
>>
>>52379420
>calling him a shit for having one of the most common issues humans in general have
Way to be a stuck up dingus.
>>
>>52379420
I am trying but it's hard (fuck you asshole)

and no, I do not post on /pol/
>>
>>52379423
that's more common than you think really. The idea that you totally have to love and be a crazy close family is kinda weird to me since there's not really a solid reason beyond "these are the people you're constantly around for a large part of your life"

I've had many a Christmas that feels like that as well. Sometimes they're better than that for sure though.

>talk to your mother
>>
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>>52379389
William Bonney for sure.

>i hate every one I know
>then i wonder, where did my friends go?
>>
>>52379441
doesn't make it any less shit worthy. To remove blame from yourself and place it onto others is seriously not okay no matter how common

>>52379452
posting about it on 4chan won't make you any better at owning yourself. You need to sit down and do some heavy self meditation
>>
>>52379423
>tfw I get along so well with my family that all night all we do is laugh together
>>
>>52379054
>tfw no post-punk gf
>>
>>52379485
It's not okay but it makes sense.
A lot of people can't deal about being the fault of all their problems without turning to some seriously awful thoughts, including suicide. if they have to blame others just to cope with their issues it's more pitiful than worthy of criticism. That and most of them are trying to work on it, but its similar to telling a depressed person "wtf just dont be sad lol".

If you're going to call him out for it, at least offer decent advice rather than essentially saying hes a shitlord for doing so or just saying "stop it".
>>
>>52379485
>posting about it on 4chan won't make you any better
I know dude but I am not trying to make anything better at this moment
>>
twf no dino
>>
>>52379290
There's no better feel than being so much in love with someone, that you completely ignore their "flaws", both physical and mental.

I miss it...
>>
>>52379485
>a trip giving life advice
>>
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>tfw post Christmas depression beer shits
>>
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>>52379552
>tfw they just reveal flaws neither of you can get past and the love ends
>>
>>52379530
you gotta be pragmatic about these kinda things though. Grab 'em by the intangible gonads and start fixing things up. I'd honestly suggest getting off of here. I obviously don't know your posting habits or anything, but if you're on here more than maybe an hour a day max, you should really reduce it and try to find something constructive to do that'll let you at least express yourself and tune yr body a bit. I highly suggest going for walks or doing a lil bit of exercise in your house
>>
>>52379605
dO YOU like guidrd by voice :))
>>
Hopeless.
Unemployed.
No motivation.
Feel like a disappointment to everyone.
>>
>>52379645
other people's expectations mean nothing so long as you're happy with yourself. If you aren't, change that. If you lack motivation, ponder why, and find yourself a goal or something that gets you excited (whatever that may be) and start working towards it. It'll likely lead you to find some kind of employment as well

>>52379628
I do. Quite a bit actually. Do you?
>>
>>52379578
whats up with that giant broccoli?
>>
>>52379693
yeahbeeTYHOusand is my favorite album :))robert pollard is agenius o_o
>>
>tfw she will never sing my songs the way she sings top 40 shit
>>
>>52379732
I agree. I feel he's lost some of his luster these days, but still manages to produce some fine tracks. And for someone with as many as him, that's pretty solid.
>>
>tfw gender dysphoria
>>
>>52379831
You should read some Judith Butler. Her idea is basically that gender is fluid and we play our parts constantly and that they change depending on our scenario (i.e. you may be a bit more "feminine" with someone you're close with, more "dude" with some friends or something like that)
>>
>>52379831
oh and listening to of Montreal's Hissing Fauna Are You The Destroyer? and Against Me!'s Transgender Dysphoria Blues may help ya out
>>
>>52379893
thhhhhhhhR
first onew as my favortie album for a while :) i like
"Gronlandic Edit"
and
"We Were Born the Mutants Again With Leafling"
:)
>>
cute asian girl and i become best friends. she's been dating this dude for a while, he goes off to college (we're still in high school). we make out/hook up several times and its a big deal because its kinda my first kiss. i develop crazy feelings for her and think we'll start dating. she chooses the other guy tho. she lied to him about how far we actually went (told him we just made out twice when irl we hooked up four times and did everything except have sex) and now he hates me. i hate myself for thinking i could deserve some sort of happiness/for making him hate me (i know i'm in the wrong here). she still wants to be best friends and i just dont know how to handle everything. i love her and dont want to lose her but idk if i can keep the whole "friends" thing going for much longer. also i cut myself and probably have manic depression.
>>
>>52380020
Had almost the exact same experience with an Asian girl too (I'm not depressed and I don't cut though).

What kind of Asian was she?
>>
Insignificance
Helplessness
Feeling Empty
Alinated from others

Any music for this?
>>
>>52379950
do u hate me
>>
>>52379950
Some other oM songs deal with gender identity (Tim I Wish You Were Born a Girl) poke around the discography tho I'm pretty sure Hissing Fauna is the best album for that
>>
>living in a small town
>my usual friends are plebs
>i fell alone and sad when i am with them
>found a guy with my same interests
>but he avoids me and i'm too shy to ask
>want to move to a bigger city
>feeling too old (i'm 18)
>>
>>52380298
i ve heard all the albums i like them all a lot but i .like hissing fauna the best it really speaks to me o_o well not the genr identity part but heh u know
>>
>>52380322
also
>I see no future ahead of me
>>
i'm probably going to be sent off to syria soon.
>>
>>52379505
>tfw no jazz gf
>>
>>52380322
>18
>Old

You've got your whole life ahead of you. I'd love to be 18 again.
>>
>>52380102
vietnamese.

her butt is unreal.
>>
>>52379275
coedine sound great so far thanks man
>>
>codependant relationship, tons of fighting and annoyances
>she cheats on me after 3.5 years, broke up with her
>feel like you cant trust anyone
>noone left i care deeply about
>feel empty
>passive deathwish

You can only listen to ITAOTS and Hospice so much before they get old.
>>
>tfw My balls hurt from jacking off so much and I don't get to see my girlfriend until new years eve


>>52379645
Titus Andronicus - The Airing of Grievances (seriously this is perfect for you)
>>
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>>52380639
>Titus Andronicus

Thank you kind anon.
>>
>tfw you're the guy a girl is cheating on her bf with
How do I handle these feels? I don't know if it's Alpha or Beta
>>
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>>52380623
you'll want to slit your neck while listening to this album
>>
>>52381087
Thanks m8
>>
>broke
>barely getting by in school
>being a radio DJ is cool and all, but it barely pays the bills
>have feelings for my qt korean ex but there's no way I have my shit together enough to make her want to get back together
>all of the sorority girls who I had 1 night stands with never called back
>all I want is a yuppie girl who likes 70s jazz and civic design
>got my art published in a pretty note-worthy publication a while back
>the reception was covered by noisey and they photographed my piece
>tfw still feel insignificant no matter what
>>
>just got back from spending a day with my father's family
>I hate them
>Grandfather is a nazi
>shouting his /pol/-tier bullshit really loud for HOURS
>my father felt really bad too, only person i liked there
>they all hate me
>didn't even get something for christmas from them
>tfw you're scared that you'll be like that someday
>>
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>>52379711
das gumby nigga
>>
>>52381371
>>
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>tfw want heroin & company
>>
>>52381212
>>all I want is a yuppie girl who likes 70s jazz and civic design


High standards much?
>>
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>tfw dubs
>>
>tfw a girl likes me but I'm too anxious to talk to her
>tfw I'm actually paranoid that a bunch of girls organised a ruse to a boy they never spoke to, making him believe somebody likes him
>tfw I want to try to talk to her, and I waste everychance saying "tomorrow I'll do it"
>>
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>>52381212
pretentious asshole with broken heart; it's right there
>>
>>52381513
t took ,e a lot of coruage to talk to dino butn ow ere best friends o_ o just do it :)
>>
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>>52381416
>>
>>52381513
Just do it buddy. You sound just like me when i was younger hahaa
>>
>>52381487
where?
>>
>>52381577
I'm 32
>>
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>>52381567
>grumbo
>>
>>52381607
well that sucks
>>
>>52379054
>bad reaction to medication
>now perma zombie, and constantly on benzos

what do you ya guys got for these feels
>>
>tfw you're ugly
>tfw the only advice anyone can give is to accept yourself and the fact that no one is ever going to love you
>>
>>52381454
surprisingly accurate if i think about it though I don't like that album as much as i used to
>>
> tfw time is passing faster everyday and you still accomplished nothing
> tfw soon you'll have to find a job
>>
>tfw 19, feeling too old to question my sexuality
>>
Life is depressing and repetitive
Life is depressing and repetitive
Life is depressing and repetitive
>>
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>>52381696
Just accept that you like cock and live on - you don't have to choose, you know ?
>>
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>>52379054
>Don't fap for 1 month
>Start dating girl
>Get kinkier because hormone levels rising
>Tell her I want her to gain weight to get thicker
>She calls me a weirdo and dumps me
>Fap the next day
>Fetish immediately gone
>>
>tfw you think you've finally matured enough to be in a fulfilling relationship with a girl but the only girls you know are either taken or platonic friends
>tfw only socialising i do is with close friends or at nightclubs where its too loud and everyones too drunk to talk properly
>>52381696
you're never too old
my friend came out a week before his 20th birthday and he's never been happier
>>
>>52381696
>>
>>52381816
kek'd
>>
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>tfw would rather be weird and alone than be a boring normie with a gf
>>
>>52381880
you say that now
>>
>tfw needy and clingy to bf
>tfw hes a mountain man and always away

:-(
>>
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>just ate a bunch of burritos
>>
>>52381880
lol
>>
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>>52381880
>>
>>52381880
post your waifu
>>
>>52379078
betrayed in the octagon
>>
>>52381893
To be fair, there's no reason to have a gf until someone starts their career and has a steady paying job.
>>
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>>52381990
>>
>>52382071
when are you getting married?
>>
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>just had lunch with coworkers
>at one point they were all talking about their significant other

>none of them had heard of death grips
>>
>tfw constant anxiety about death / what's after it
>>
>>52380102
I feel like asians dont have regard for people's feelings
>>
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>>52382093
oh
oh, man
>>
>got broken up with 6 months ago
>gf started fucking one of my good friends
>no one in my friend group on my side
>can't stand the sight of them
>both ex and friend are my coworkers until May

recs for this unavoidable emotional torture?
>>
>>52382154
yeah, laugh at me for having autism or something
fuck you
>>
>>52381933
I don't consider fat people human. When I see a fat person, I think, "where's the rest of your heard?" and I usually scan the room for other fatties. I usually don't expect them to even talk with people, I expect them to wait and only talk to fat people. When I do have the misfortune to run into one of these whales and are forced to talk to them, I usually don't make eye contact or smile.

Anyone else hate fatties?
>>
>>52382216
then just don't fucking visit 4chan you retard and work out your fucking life
>>
>>52382249
just fuck off you piece of shit
>>
>>52382263
wow very productive
>>
recs for unrequited love
>>
>>52382119
literally nothing anon! thats the beauty of it. You can a long awaited permanent break after your done with this mediocre place! So fuckin live it up bud, and don't be scared of your rest, embrace it
>>
>>52382342
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCxd62yzoOs
>>
>>52382342
>>
>>52382327
how about I chop your head off and send pictures of it to your friends and family, I think that'd be productive
>>
>>52382351
>can
get***
>>
>>52382360
arguing with me won't solve your problems. But yeah, just wallow in your own depression
>>
>>52382351
>>52382369
that's literally the worst thing ever, I like consciousness

>le literally nothing *tips fedora*

i hope you cut yourself with your edges you nihilist cunt
>>
>>52382410
don't act like you're trying to help me, you know that's a gigantic load of bullshit
>>
i wixsh dinow as here
>>
>>52382444
i-im s-sorry....i was just trying to ease your mind, because that's what eases mine..i've been there too man
>>
>>52382444
*tips meme*

captcha: fedora sorts
>>
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>that feel when fuck buddy gets me two faulkner books and a gabriel marquez
>that feel when I only spent 15 minutes making her a shitty ambient mix (which she loved)
>that feel when I get drunk every night and watch star trek and then hit her up and have sex with her
>that feel when I don't want to date her because the reason we started sleeping together (a year ago) was because she was cheating on her boyfriend
>that feel when all my friends think we are dating
>>
>>52382623
btw np: yellow magic orchestra
>>
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>tfw lost almost 20 kg earlier this year, but I've slowly been gaining them back
>tfw running out of money and my rent is coming up
>tfw still madly in love with my ex, even though she hasn't responded to my calls in almost 2 years
>tfw stomach ache
>tfw chair is pretty uncomfy right now
>>
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>tfw your career as an actor / director isn't taking off the way you expected it to
>>
>>52382689
how the fuck did you think it was going to take off you absolute retard
>>
>>52382711
it's hard to explain my dreams, they're pretty specific
>>
>>52382689
You need to suck some cocks, johnny.
>>
>>52380468
yeah i know but i feel like i have to hurry up to make all the stuff i wanted to do in adolescence or i will live my shitty life forever, i don't want to be a 40 years old neckbeard who wasted his life, sometimes i wish time would stop for a year or two..
>>
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>>52382689
>you will never make a series of critically acclaimed independent films
>>
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>>52382737
dude you've intrigued me continue
>>
>>52382871
My last couple pieces I've done have only gotten a bit of attention / recognition

It's incredibly frustrating explaining a really specific thing like costuming, font, framing of a shot, or an actor's enunciation of a line to people who aren't really in the project
>>
>tfw my dick hurts when I pee
>>
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>tfw no shoegaze+noise thick qt gf to sit on my face and then cry with
>>
>>52383137
>tfw no thick / big gf in general
>>
>tfw getting attracted to a girl after 1 year of not being attracted to anyone
>>
>>52383063
rub it
>>
>>52382939
i don't understand how your passions or dreams would be frustrating to explain. i don't think you're cut out for directing or acting
>>
>tfw social anxiety makes me act like a total weirdo around family and strangers
>tfw dread every holiday dinner because I make myself look worse every year
>tfw I'm actually an outgoing, funny person around friends but anywhere else I'm a shy, scared person
>tfw I just want to show my family I'm not a total weirdo

m-maybe next year
>>
>>52383256
what else do i do with my visions? paint? and acting isn't frustrating to me
>>
>>52383262
you and I, bro.
I could have gotten a qt gf these past few months, but my social anxiety stopped me from it.
>>
>>52383295
idk man but expressing is the very essence of directing. if you can't get through to people what you want then you're completely wasting your time.
>>
>>52383199
m-mah nigga
;_;
>>
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>>52380364
>>
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>tfw worked 80 hours over Christmas week
>tfw haven't slept for days
>>
>>52379054
>At home alone in my dark room
>My best friend has been ignoring me
>After a fun summer and senior year.
>We both admitted having feelings for each other
>Now she's just another memory
>>
>>52384051
wre
dino o_o
>>
who /tfwnogf/ here
>>
>tfw clingy best friend who's always complaining about being so lonely
All I want to do is be alone and be consumed by solitude.
I want out.
>>
>tfw there's a qt Annie Clark doppelganger at uni
>tfw have the guts to do something about it
>tfw a month before I go back to uni
>>
>>52384943
inb4 she's a lesbian
>>
>tfw no qt gf to lay next to on the floor with in our 3rd story apartment, on a shag carpet, on a friday evening, raining outside, nothing else mattering besides us and the records playing in the background
:(
>>
>>52385201
>tfw no entitlement complex and want a relationship that isn't based on a juvenile urge to do coupley shit with an attractive girl
:)
>>
>tfw mother knows about your drug use but you dont have the heart to open up about being an addict yet
>>
>>52385277
you sound upset, friend, over something that will never even remotely affect you
>>
>>52385364
not upset, just tired of pussies like you.
>>
>>52385510
>taking every overtly romantic fantasy on /mu/ seriously
not him, but i'm pretty sure he joking with the excessive romance and specifications and you just need to chill.
>>
close friend of mine is moving away in 2015
rec me some albums moo
>>
>>52385510
well, fuck you too then.

>>52385625
sort of. how is is worse than all the waifufags moaning about holding lauren's sweaty hand ?
>>
>>52385665
>sort of. how is is worse than all the waifufags moaning about holding lauren's sweaty hand ?
who says they aren't pussies too?
>>
>>52379054
>tfw late night
>litres of strong caffe
>reading pdf's
>writing 15 pages about economy for close
>>
>>52385626
check out Mike Skinner's The Streets stuff.
proper lad feels music.
>>
>>52385683
*for close deadline
>>
>>52385681
the point is that they're joking and you're too dense to realize it.
>>
>tfw in love with best friend but she's in a steady relationship

I need music for this feeling. The only song I have for it is Please Do Not Go by The Violent Femmes.
>>
>>52385681
did daddy get you the 64 gb iphone instead of the 128 gb one or what ? your jimmies are rustled, friend.
>>
I feel lost and weak to survive life.
>>
>>52385782
are you literally 12?
>>
>>52385861
are you literally an autist ?
>>
>>52385887
no, i took the online test and i'm clean.
>>
I just want something with incredibly heavy sounds to it and not terrible metal vocals. Really heavy noise rock, basically. Some good bands include Sonic Youth and Live Skull as well as other bands of early no wave like in No New York. Anyone know any more?
>>
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>moving in about a week to a town 1000x better than this one & finally doing something with my life
>feel a strange mixture of nostalgia, nervousness, and sentimentality, but most of all complete apathy towards everything somehow

what 2 feel
>>
>>52380639
will is that you?
>>
>>52385923
iktf. Right after highschool I moved from my comfy little village to NYC. Lived there for a few months, but now I'm back in said comfy little village :(

I regret leaving New York
>>
>>52386402
it's fuckin weird man. I know I should be excited but I'm not. it probably won't be till I'm actually there for a while when I finally go "whoa" and it hits me
>>
>Finally starting to get in touch with a girl I'm interested in
>Going to record some of my songs this winter
>Meeting lots of old friends
>Things are starting to look good in my life
>Starting feel like I have a purpose in life
Though I'm afraid everything will fall apart soon
>>
>>52386587
It seriously didn't really hit me until I boarded the plane to go home. I was just sitting there looking out over the city and all of a sudden I'm like "man, what the fuck am I doing?"

notagoodfeeling.jpg
>>
wanna fucking fight????
>>
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I don't know if I like a girl and if she likes me back. A bit insecure to try to talk to her. Music for this and what do?
>>
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>be 4 years old
>laying on bed w/ my mom while watching spongebob SquarePants
>fall asleep
>hear some noises in the living room
>crawl to the door
>see my father on my mother with a knife
>i'm shocked
>they see me
>my mother hits my father
>he drops the knife
>and she throws him a doll with needles
>his face is bleeding
>my mother and I run towards the exit
>the police car is coming
>we take a taxi, and go to my grandmother's house
>>
>liked girl
>was supposed to go on a date with her
>cancels day before saying she forgot and made other plans
>a week later fucks guy in the same room as me during a party
>she knew I liked her
Not sure what I can listen to for this feel.
>>
>>52387111
check out ariel pinks new album pom pom
>>
>tfw you're too far away
>tfw why are you doing this to me
>tfw you're so fucking far away
>tfw i just want us to be fine again
>>
>>52379054
>tapering off suboxone, getting shitty sleep and waking up dope sick for the past few weeks.
>tired all the time
>>
>>52387150
you should have killed them both when you had them in the same room bro
>>
>>52387150
get her out of your life dude and move on

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qd8-IYovLRQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14K6KtBlusY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzMrK-aGCug

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Uj2JpvsvX4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eO-eAldJmA8
>>
>questioning sexuality (might be bi), lonely, bored with my life, scared for future
>>
>>52387299
I should have.
The thing is, I was one of her good friends, and I was too much of a chickenshit to do anything about it.
The guy was pretty cool though, she is just a huge slut that takes advantage of guys.
>>
>>52387221
the hotelier - home like noplace is there
>>
>>52387311
I got her out of my life, thank god.
I'm feeling a bit better about myself now that I've moved on.
also thanks for the recs, anon.
>>
>tfw the only thing preventing you from killing yourself is jenny death and metal gear solid 5
need some recs
>>
>>52387321
>tfw got off for the first time in a while on gifs of boobs
>imma gril btw
>straight but became confused and felt a little lonely after
>not sure how to feel
>>
think i'm developing a psychological addiction to ecstasy
taken it at least once a week for the past 2 months and don't feel like I can have fun without it anymore.
Having the greatest times of my life but starting to feel they are all because of a fucking chemical
>>
>>52387417
That's my problem. I can get off to guys, but I feel weird seeing their faces when I do. I don't think I'd be able to ever be in a gay relationship. Quite confused.
>>
>>52387462
stop buying it, force yourself to stop using it
>>
>>52387409
Jenny Death
>>
>>52387491
i've tried that, I'll go to a club, drink, then not enjoy myself and end up buying a pill off some punter in the club.
It doesn't help that most of my friends I have made through drugs and there is always something about.
Alcohol just doesn't do it for me anymore and as a student not drinking just doesn't really work
>>
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>>52387480
yep thats me to a T just different genders. purely sexual. in fact i actually dont really care for vaginas, its just tits

its honestly probably quite normal for both of us, i assume its less socially acceptable for a guy to admit though (whcih is unfortunate). but i rly cant help that lonely feeling afterwards
>>
>>52387580
if your ecstasy problem really is a genuine problem then you have to stop spending time with your junkie friends and stop clubbing so much. if other students don't have a drug dependency then why do you? you've figured out the cause for your issue and that's the social group you've surrounded yourself in, exit that and you'll be psychologically sound again
>>
>>52387580
or continue spending time with your junkie friends but gain some fucking will power
>>
>tfw you want to ask for advice about a relationship but scared they might see it
>you know they dont really browse anymore but just the off chance they do
>>
>>52387462
>>52387580
m8 take it from someone who's addicted to opiates.

you don't want to continue using any drug regularly. unless it's something relatively harmless in comparison like caffeine or nicotine or weed (weed is even arguable tho at times)

i used to be content to just drink with the boys and i enjoyed myself. but then vicodin got thrown in the mix and after a few months i could not enjoy myself without having it.

my mind grew to not only become reliant on it to have a good time, but to function.

granted, opiates are both physically and psychologically addictive (whereas i don't think ecstasy is not physically addictive, you won't experience withdrawals from quitting) you're setting yourself up for being fucking miserable if you continue abusing this drug.

and even tho yah i gotta deal with both phys and psych addiction, the psych part is by far the biggest bitch to overcome.

you gotta take a break at the very least, otherwise you're hardwiring your brain to become dependent on a drug to enjoy yourself. not fun man. addiction is a bitch.

also, keep in mind ecstasy is terrible for you when taken in excess. that shit causes mental health problems like no other. have some willpower while you still have the ability.
>>
>>52387639
It's just that I have the lingering thought in the back of my head that if I were to come out that I'm also attracted to men, I might not feel so ashamed about it. Which could open up the possibility of me seeking out a healthy gay relationship.
>>
>>52387719
well try and think unbiased about the idea of you being with another man, how do you feel? does it feel generally nice/right, or not as preferable as if you were with the opposite sex?
>>
>met someone last year, instant emotional connection, spent virtually every day with them since then
>our sexual orientations don't align
>this year we're living further apart and don't see each other as much
>social and psychological dependency on that person from last year hasn't subsided at all
>it fucking kills me to live apart from them
>ignoring all my other close friends, incredibly jealous when I see this person with other people
>starting to scare myself with how much this is affecting me emotionally
>feel like a shell of the person I once was/like my life is now all about someone else and I don't do anything for myself anymore

advice as well as recs would be cool
>>
>>52387462
ecstasy is seriously one of the stupidest things to take in excess. you're supposed to take breaks from it for a reason, it depletes your serotonin and your brain needs time to sort that shit out. keep abusing it and eventually you'll completely ruin the effects it gives you (honestly to the point where you won't even want to take it anymore because everytime you do you don't feel anything), you risk developing serotonin syndrome (where your body can't produce enough serotonin naturally naturally anymore), your comedowns are just going to get worse and worse until you're barely able to function on them and you'll suffer from a load of other physical problems

at least abuse something worth abusing
>>
>>52379054
>lonely but such a terrible conversationalist that I don't make much effort to speak to my friends because the conversation would die quickly
>>
>tfw you always be alone
>>
>tfw middle of night, caffe, writing 15 pages of essay, deadline tomorrow
>>
>>52387872
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwYX52BP2Sk
>>
>>52387846
Keaton Henson - Dear (Deluxe Edition)
Giles Corey - Hinterfaicek

Prepare yourself.
>>
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>>52387846
just focus everything on your own mental health/doing your own thing. trust me
pick up some kind of hobby or focus on a hobby you already have and try to excel at it. go on walks, go out with other friends and try to meet new people either irl or even online
its going to suck for a while and things will remind you of them and what have you but it gets easier. maybe even delete them from social media if you wanna be drastic

id rec you something sad but its not good to dwell on things you already dwell so much on. try something uplifting https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCEYSx8MmGo
>>
>>52387648
>>52387673
you are speaking sense here and I thank you for that but just dropping a whole friends group is hard. In the new year I think I'm gonna try and cut back, (yeah new year new me bs I know) limit my self to special occasions and try sort myself out a bit
>>52387697
cheers mate, I definitely will take a break for a while. I can see it's a path I don't really want to head down, even if that means having a few life changes.
I'm just having such a great time, I've met so many unbelievable people, made so many memories that will stay with me and I almost don't want anything else.
I can see it's a bad road to take though, even now the boys will pull out a bag of ket or coke and it can and probably will escalate.
Thanks though, I definitely need a kick in some sort of direction and confirmation of what I should do
>>
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>>52385723
anyone?
>>
tfw when your roommate up and moves out and you can't move back home because your goddamn shit person of a stepmom has made you not welcome there, and you're really wondering how you're going to pay rent next month. Oh, and your best friend is suicidally depressed. And you haven't seen your adorable half sisters in months because of stepmom, and you miss the shit out of them.
>>
>>52387851
I realise this and it's another point as to why I think I should cut back. I've started to use 5htp (serotonin precursor) in the days before/after as damage control but you are still right
>>
>>52387976
See
>>52387920
Especially Dear in this situation.
>>
>tfw life isnt for you
>>
>>52388010
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nm76wh5VXSE
>>
>smoked too much weed yesterday
>was pretty fucking gone and thought I was gonna be like this forever
>racing thoughts, only thing I could do was lay down and listen to music
>fell asleep and had some very vivid and strange dreams
>first thing I did today was meditate and clean my apartment
>today been thinking about a girl I met a month ago and gonna meet in 2 weeks

mixed feels
>>
>>52388010
Modest Mouse - Building Nothing out of Something

Modest Mouse - The Moon And Antarctica

The Microphones - The Glow Pt. 2

Or just listen to /mu/chellapalooza today.
>>
>>52388010
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiCRZLr9oRw
>>
>>52387949
i know it doesn't help when the only thing to do is go out to bars and general carousing (my buddies were the same way, that's how we enjoyed each others company--drugs are always going to be prevalent during those instances). if you can, invite these people you've met or you're friends with to do things outside of the nightlife. have a jog in the day time, grab coffee, play ping ping, hike, anything.

a hobbie helps. healthy distractions m8. good luck.
>>
>tfw on opioids 24/7 to fight my social anxiety
>>
>at home with family
>have to go back to shitty dorms and live in squalor again soon
>no peace, no good food, not comfy
>impacts my love for music for some reason
>>
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has anyone here seen a therapist? what was your experience? i'm thinking of seeing one, but i'm afraid that it'll be a waste of time.
>>
>>52387939
thanks man, this was really helpful. mostly i just wanna hear that this is something normal to be feeling. i don't have any romantic connection with them, i don't get why it's so intense? and i had no idea i had such an obsessive personality, it scares me and i really want that to go away (i haven't told anyone ever).
>>
>after 1 year of trying, finally realized this afternoon it was impossible. She has definitely no interest.

>depressed again
>>
>>52388150
Good, actually. A therapist who's good will be able to pick up on the things you're unable to vocalize or word and will be able to understand you. Like actually understand. It's uncomfortable at first, because you ARE strangers, but it gets so much better.
>>
>>52388010
I would listen to some powerviolence, but maybe that's not what you want at all

>meeting my closest high school friends after a year of college, was looking forward to it
>finally have a drink with them all
>now they seem like total uneducated racist homophobes to me
>>
>tfw going to a concert
>tfw worried I might see my ex there
>tfw I still have feelings for her

>tfw broke nofap
>>
>>52388150
Im seeing one in February. Kinda scared and will feel like it will be a waste too
>>
>>52388150
Saw one for well over a year, it helped immensely. I'm far less selfish and far less angry and whatever nowadays.
>>
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>work for school radio station
>frequently go above and beyond what is asked of me
>very committed to the station despite a lot of drama happening
>music director left after last semester
>both him and the sports director wanted me as the music director for next semester
>talked to faculty director about it
>he said he'll consider it
>fast forward to last week
>get email
>"I've chosen, as the new music director, some guy who's never worked at the station before
>but I'm willing to create a new position: assistant music director, and that would go to you
>what do you think? You have until Jan. 10 to decide."
>not sure whether to accept the second-rate offer or quit in a huff
>>
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>>52381667
>>
>>52388150
went to 2 therapists, disliked them both and couldnt really open up
>>
>>52388325
Do you like being there?
>>
>best friend died this year and i found his body
>think i'm ok about it now
>nothing horribly wrong with my life
>just feel an existential sadness sometimes
>>
>>52388325

It's fuckin' college radio, who cares? If you like what you do then keep doing it. And you never know, the random dude might actually know his shit (or at least be willing to learn).
>>
donoser
>>
>>52388325
get to know the new guy first
who knows, maybe he's cool
>>
>>52388428
I'm sorry for your loss, anon.

I think Benji might actually work here.
>>
FUCK YOUR FEELINGS

YOU ALL SUCK COCKS
>>
>>52388472
Thank you, I have actually been meaning to check that out so I will do
>>
>>52388519
No Love Deep Web
>>
>>52388390
I did before all the drama that I mentioned- the stuff that went down (caused by the same faculty director that's now gypping me of the role I know I deserve) caused all of my friends to quit.

I do like having a show, and it's possible that even in the lesser position, my being in an important role would convince some of my friends that it's worth coming back. Some of them did say they'd come back if I were the actual music director, after all.
Not to mention that my crush still works at the station for the time being (as if that matters, I'll never talk to her anyway).

>>52388455
It's not that he doesn't know his shit- he's apparently worked at other stations before- but after all the faculty director's said about showing commitment to the station, him going with someone who's never attended a single meeting over someone who's given up weekends for the station is the biggest slap in the face I've had in a while.
And yeah, it's petty bullshit, but the station's all I've had these last two years.

>>52388463
I don't even know his name, and probably won't be able to meet him until the semester starts, which is after the deadline I was given.
>>
>>52388519
That's cool dude, don't you have a YLYL thread on /b/ that you should be shit posting in?
>>
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holy fuck im lonely
>>
Remember: if you are unhappy alone, you won't be happy if you are together with someone.
>>
>>52388567
weres dino
>>
>>52388642
I can confirm this, as someone who was unhappy alone, then unhappy with a girl that I loved and that loved me, and now unhappy alone again.
>>
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>Have a good friend
>He's my gateway in to his group of friends who are all cool to hang out with
>Gets a girlfriend
>4 months pass with her and he spends a lot of time with her
>Because of that I don't go out as much since I'm not yet to the point to be great friends with the group for them to invite me personally
>Earlier this week out of the blue invites me out to drink
>Tells me him and his GF split, he looks really upset
>Without thinking about his issues, only think that my New Year's plans are back on

Is this selfishness?
>>
>>52388707

of course it is
>>
>>52388707
na, he should still make time for his mates with a girl, i immediately made sure my gf got on with all my friends and i saw my friends at least 2 times a week
>>
>>52388707

Try to embrace the friendship man

>don't fucking try that shit using friends as rungs to get to the top
>>
>>52388707
yes, but most friends are only friends because one of them has something the other wants. in this case, party invites
>>
>friend's dad hung himself
>going to the wake tomorrow

Funerals and wakes suck man, I hate saying, "I'm sorry for your loss."

I just wanna show the family I really feel for them, but I can't find the words. I wanna be a small comfort in this time of grief, but I'm stuck with the same phrase everyone else is gonna say.
>>
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>meet qt girl
>idealize the fuck out of her
>foam at all the possibilities, the vacations to strange and new locations, museums, dances, birthdays, coffees, walks
>actually start going on dates with her
>small details about her looks and character start nagging at me
>start seeing flaws
>she's actually becoming a real person
>start becoming evasive and condescending
>dream falls apart
>stop answering messages
>hope to god we don't cross paths on the street
>repeat
>>
im cold o _O
>>
>tfw MCR is dead and gone forever
>tfw I know deep down no one else will come around to fill the void
>>
>>52387862
anyone?
>>
>>52389636
I used to be the same as you, I didn't know how to conversate with people, I was always that guy who killed every joke and was told I was annoying.
Honestly I just got better with practice and observation, and getting a bit more self confidence.
Observe, practice, and all that.
>>
>>52389636
Also, Anon, I'll talk to you.
>>
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that feel when this thread is mostly just shitty and menial feels and not music to accompany or associate with them
>>
>tfw everything is going fine for me and life is great
>>
>>52389428
listen to botdf
>>
>>52390302
discovery
>>
>>52387862
lonerism?
>>
>>52390336
>botdf
I just checked out some of their music
I don't think I'll be doing that again
>>
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>tfw you don't properly love your gf but you don't want to hurt her feelings
>>
>talked to girl all evening
>got absolutely wrecked
>previously didn't know her at all but thought she was cute
>woke up next in her bed fully clothed at 6am the next day
>later woke up on my toilet floor
>don't think anything actually happened between us even though she was holding my hand and shit
>only really remember her telling me to meet her in the morning in a really cute way
>didn't because I was still drunk/asleep
>tfw probably pussied out but can't remember
>think about her all the time
>had a daydream about getting married before I realised how weird that was
>not gonna see her for a month at least

>tfw in love and I don't know why and I might have already fucked it up but I can't remember so I have no idea where I stand and it's haunting me
>>
>>52388150
I see a therapist on a weekly basis. She's amazing. Before, I was in a depressive, suicidal funk. I couldn't feel feelings, I couldn't escape the hollowness of my life. A few months later, it's mostly a distant memory. My life's not perfect, but she's helped me accept imperfection better. So I got that going for me.
This isn't my first therapist, though. I had similar depression problems in high school and the one I had then sucked. So, if you don't like your therapist after the second session, don't hesitate in dropping their ass and trying a new one. You won't get shit accomplished if you don't like them.
Also, you won't get shit accomplished if you're not willing to change and recognize your flaws.
Good luck, anon. I hope your potential future therapy goes well.
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