If each board on 4chan started a band, what would they be like?
Hard rock/early heavy metal with elements of chiptune and film soundtracks. The band members spend less time composing than they do complaining about other bands and their songs.
Symphonic metal with a crazy fun mood and a high fantasy lore that carries on throughout all their albums. Famous for their unusual on-stage costumes, as well as after-show incidents involving said costumes.
Experimental prog rock with unstable beats, bursts of highly distorted guitars, and improvised free-time bass. Features occasional vocal samples from TV shows and cartoons.
An Oi! Skinhead punk band with Industrial beats and production
Think Skrewdriver crossed with Death Grips
I was thinking more like Madlib, but yeah. Basically DOOM's Adult Swim album if Madlib had produced it instead of Danger Mouse
>s a general category of fallacies in which a claim or argument is rejected on the basis of some irrelevant fact about the author of or the person presenting the claim or argument
I'm always here, no matter what. Trip or no trip.
Beach Boys-esque psychedelic pop with lyrics about animals and nature.
Some kind of freak folk group. Most people think of the band as just a vehicle for the frontman.
Grungy prog-rock with a keyboard centric sound.
A mix of various electronic genres, the liveset would be changing genres as it goes on, each change would have a member appear in different clothes while the other goes to switch out clothes for the next genre swap, different genres would reflect different designers and styles of clothing, etc
Really really really shitty brostep.
Something along the lines of Anal Cunt
Some nationalist band, probably very vanilla and "non-degenerate". Possibly also a classical choir.
Various electronic genres, but made only with FOSS programs. Would also have samples from other various Creative Commons licensed works. Album cover would be reminiscent of vaporwave, but with various GNU images.
Dark ambient, mostly it's just them arguing because somebody wants to put samples from Anne Rice movies in the tracks
70s prog rock revival band, they sing about fantastic worlds far off in space
Try to remake the BTAS soundtrack, but finding out orchestras are expensive do it all on MIDI and it sounds fucking awful
Really really bitter emo about the girls that they'll never get
They spend about five years composing a neo-classical piece that winds up sounding pretty decent
Hipster pop based entirely on image, a la Lana Del Rey but ripping off Lorde's style
They make joke hip-hop, like Poon Patrol but not as funny
They make joke hip-hop, like Poon Patrol but just as good
Chiptune band, falls apart because it's as bad as pop punk
Tries to make a band but can't decide whether or not the mall should be on a different planet or if it should just be a regular mall, and then they argue a whole bunch and the whole project falls apart.
Japanese metal along the lines of 403
Field recordings of people reading campfire horror stories, interspersed with the sounds of people getting blown by succubi
New-Burzum-style European folk/ambient
20 minute progressive power metal epics
Top 40 pop
Guys in fedoras playing classic rock-style covers of 90's video game music
There are a surprising amount of post-rock fans on /mlp/. I pray to God this never happens, but:
>Godspeed You! Black Emperor, with all of the samples replaced with sound bites from the show
A hip-hop or electronic record with tons of samples from TDKR
Dark ambient or neoclassical darkwave
A mix of post-rock and shoegaze with Death Grips-like rapping and industrial sounds
Drunken, happy, party, feel good folk metal
/toy/ would be some upbeat pop rock
/int/ would try to rip off a hawk and a hacksaw
/vg/ would be noise
/b/ would be farting into a mic
/an/ and /out/ would release a colab album of field samples of nature
Avant-Garde music accompanied by strange videos similar to The Residents
World-influenced punk band that argues all the time over which native music is better
Shitty edgy metalcore
Power metal that sounds amazing
/tv/ would be big band but it would be extremely painful to listen to.
The fact that so many books still name the Beatles "the greatest or most significant or most influential" rock band ever only tells you how far rock music still is from becoming a serious art. Jazz critics have long recognized that the greatest jazz musicians of all times are Duke Ellington and John Coltrane, who were not the most famous or richest or best sellers of their times, let alone of all times. Classical critics rank the highly controversial Beethoven over classical musicians who were highly popular in courts around Europe. Rock critics are still blinded by commercial success: the Beatles sold more than anyone else (not true, by the way), therefore they must have been the greatest. Jazz critics grow up listening to a lot of jazz music of the past, classical critics grow up listening to a lot of classical music of the past. Rock critics are often totally ignorant of the rock music of the past, they barely know the best sellers. No wonder they will think that the Beatles did anything worth of being saved....
god i fucking hate scaruffi so much he's so fucking pretentious and stupid god damn
Tumblr irony looks a little something like this.
/s4s/ would be more like constant break beats and aggressive high-pitched synths, cut with vocal samples of Anal Cunt and Passenger of Shit. Each track would be a sonic assault, making you question why you're still listening, yet simultaneously drawing you deeper, just to see how disgustingly grimy and unappealing they can make themselves sound.
/b/ - grindcore
/mu/ - pretentious indie folk rock with a high pitched singer. Not actually that good but it's not mainstream so who cares?
/v/ - metal band that finds itself inspired by video game music
/mlp/ - brostep (ever listen to their music? no? well it all sounds like this
/prog/ - prog rock duh
Neofolk, NSBM, Nazi Punk, Martial Industrial, and Wagner