How about those selfish mares, eh?
>New GoogleDoc Pastebin Archive:
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Why don't repost some old ass green?
DesuStorage is running again, and has all the material.
Maybe some writefags will be back if we keep going or someone will take and old green that was left to die.
Who knows, maybe someone that can finnish Oblivious Anon or Magical Boy.
Or the other with the spanks, i personally like Magical boy anon more, but it died sometime ago
what is a stallion to do when a little filly crushes on him
what is a stallion to do when several fillies crush on him
No one treats the strike seriously until Sombra comes in as the speaker for Stallion's rights. Celestia and Luna come in about a week later saying, "Yeah, we wanted to fix our sexist government system, but we didn't have a reason to till now. Here you go." Then the Mane 6 herd with Sombra, except for Pinkie who was already in a herd with Mr. and Mrs. Cake.
Stallions on Strike focuses mostly on family problems, so if you like Slice of Life, go ahead.
Cocksock her, train her to fit his tastes, fill her with fillies of her own as frequently as possible, repeat as often as necessary.
At some point, most children, regardless of species, will try to find a male to take them as their cocksock.
It's not weird at all for that male to be their father.
Ivy. Fluttershy's daughter.
Them and Snapshot, right?
Hold on I have an idea.
>CMC try to get Anon to take them as his cocksocks.
>They keep doing lewd things (or at least what they think is lewd) in front of him in an attempt to be enticing.
>It just confuses Anon.
>The CMC ask their respective big sisters how to get a stallion's attention.
>Rainbow Dash tells Scootaloo to show off her chest fluff.
>Rarity tells Sweetie Belle to be a gentlemare.
>Applejack tells Apple Bloom that stallions like gifts, going off what she remembers of their parents.
"Hey ,Applebloom, whatcha got there?"
>"It's a present for ya 'Non"
"Oh you shouldn't have."
>"Go ahead and open it"
"Uh, Applebloom, what is this?"
>"It's ma tuft in a box, we horsemarried now 'Non"
>Fucking tiny horses man.
>Anon is a finally reaches wizardom
>tfw no magic powers
>winds up in Equestria, is now a real wizard
>Has to fend off horny mares trying to steal his mana
>"Oh, let me get the door for you Anon!"
"It's fine, Sweetie Belle."
>"I insist! HNGh!"
>You watch as the small filly strains to push open the human-sized door to your house.
>You shake your head and do it for her, causing her to stumble forward.
>"Hey, I said I got it!"
"You don't need to do that, Sweetie."
>Fucking tiny horses man.
thats a good idea
>mares who do manage fuck him gain a massive power boost
>regardless if unicorn or not
>all the magic mares including
>and of course twiggles
>Archmage anon, master of sorcery
>somehow stuck in horseland, something is screwing up all attempts at dimensional portal magics.
>these small horses keep thinking you are helpless despite having full range of your magic, aside from dimensional shit
>time to fuck with these little horses
>these small horses keep thinking you are helpless despite having full range of your magic, aside from dimensional shit
>time to fuck with these little horses
Oh man I would read it so hard.
"Oh hey, Scoots, what's up-"
>Scootaloo is visibly trying to poof up her chest
>her muzzle is scrunched up and sweat is beading on her forehead
>she looks like she's about to pop a blood vessel
>[strained horse noises]
>her wings begin buzzing as she ties to fluff it up more
>her face starts turning blue under the strain
>in a final burst of fluff, Scoots passes out on your doorstep
>you slowly close the door
>fucking tiny horses man
>>in a final burst of fluff, Scoots passes out on your doorstep
>you slowly close the door
what the fuck man
>not taking her inside to make sure shes alright
>anon, being completely clueless when it comes to horselaws, buys it
>he freaks out and tries to seek a divorce in canterlot
>luna and celestia wouldn't let him live it down for months
"What do you mean that's not a law?"
>"Anonymous, there are no laws about giving a gift and forcing the other party into marriage."
>"Nowadays that is..."
"What was that last part?"
>"What our sister meant to say, is that thou art free to copulate with any of our subjects as thou choose, or if our subjects aren't enough, perhaps we can better serve you."
>"Oh boy look at the time, gotta go, Anon things to do."
>You book it as fast as you fucking can out of there.
>Fucking god horses
>"Why are you so against us being your cocksocks, Anon?! Do you.... think we're ugly?"
"You gotta understand, Scoots. Where I come from, having sex with kids is generally considered as REALLY bad. As in, it's so illegal that I'd go to jail for a while."
>"That sounds weird. And that's not how things are here!"
"But you understand why I'm... hesitant of doing anything sexual with you?"
"Don't be so sad. Maybe when you're older?"
>passing up sleeping with two essential goddesses
Because I don't want to contract something she may be a carrier for. Goddess sluts probably give me something that'll make Captain Longschlong become blacker than Aunt Jemima and fall off.
An oldie, but a goodie.
>Be Anon in Equestria.
>Immediately drop dead from alien germs.
Enjoy your no fun allowed.
Anon becomes ambassador to tartarus. Succubuses are not used to the attention.
>You are Anon.
>"H-hey! Anon! I b-bet you want some of th-this!"
>And some little filly is hitting on you.
"Sweetie, what are yo-CHRIST"
>Sweetie Belle, tail raised, is standing on your patio table and shaking her ass at you.
>No thank you, ma'am.
"Sweetie, hey, woah."
>You pick the filly up by her midsection and spin her around to face you.
"You tryin' to get your cutie mark in...."
>You really want to know if there's a pony out there whose special talent is twerking.
>That would just complete your life.
>Sweetie Belle shakes her head and giggles at you.
>"Nope! Rarity says that if I want you to make me your cocksock, then I have to show you my bum stuff."
>There are no words for this.
"Cocksock. What is- you said 'cocksock'."
>Sweetie nods, looking pleased that you're catching on so fast.
>"Yuppers! You put your thingy in me and use me to make you feel good, and I get, uh..."
>She looks like she's struggling to remember what she was going to say.
>"Rarity calls it, 'on-the-job training."
>She smiles brightly at you before turning around and showing you the goods again.
>"It's like how Missus Cheerilee sometimes keeps me after class and licks my-oops!"
>No, wait, what?
>Go back, please.
>Sweetie Belle looks over her shoulder and gives you an apologetic look.
>"I wasn't supposed to say that. Missus Cheerilee says that she could get in trouble if I told anypony about that."
>You're learning so much today.
>Disregard sexually flirtatious grade schooler.
>Go inform Rarity and police about Sweetie being abused.
>Watch with satisfaction as abusive teacher is carted off in chains.
>Be there emotionally more for Rarity more than Sweetie.
>Walk filly to after school counseling sessions because she trusts you.
>Anyone getting in trouble.
>Not rewarding it.
It's like you don't even understand the concept of cocksocks.
The difference in this case being that the cross species vector happens between two organisms that evolved in the same ecosystem. Assuming that humans and ponies are from different worlds / realities, the viruses would have evolved with those ecosystems in mind.
>You are Anon, a good few days later.
>You just woke up from a nap, having spent the last couple of hours keeping Rarity company while this whole 'Cheerilee' thing blows over.
>Rarity took it much, MUCH harder than Sweetie Belle did.
>Sweetie was fucking pleased as punch at what was happening with her teacher, so it isn't like she'll have to go to therapy any time soon.
>"Oh, Anonymous! How could I have not seen the signs? Was I really such a terrible sister? Darling, please tell me I'm a good pony. Tell me this while you scratch my ears."
>Judging by the flowers she leaves for you next to your guest bed and the way she naps on your tummy, you're pretty sure that Sweetie Belle will be getting a new big brother/father-figure pretty soon.
>But that isn't important.
What IS important is what you're going to do.
>As the last grainy eye-gunks of sleep are wiped from your eyes, you discover that you aren't alone in your room.
>No, it isn't Rarity.
>No, it isn't Sweetie Belle.
>That tiny orange filly is watching you sleep.
>"Hey, Anon! Are you awake?!"
>She starts to jump in place in her excitement, which is HUGELY adorable to you.
>She's already better than Sweetie Belle.
>"Look what I can do!"
>....and that opinion goes WAY down after Scootaloo pulls out a banana from behind her, peels it, and starts to eat it.
>She does all this while staring you in the eye.
"Scootaloo? Why are you eating bananas at me?"
>.....Is this supposed to be some kind of racist joke?
>YOU GET IT
>YOU'RE A MONKEY
>Scootaloo holds up a hoof and swallows her mouthful of banana before speaking.
>"Rainbow Dash told me that I need to show you that I can shove things down my throat!"
>She takes another bite.
>"She also said that I should use bananas because you're a monkey."
>YOU FUCKING KNEW IT
"...So where's Rainbow right now?"
>You can feel a headache coming on.
"I think I need to have a talk with her."
>unending chain of events where fillys bother anon with ridiculous sexual things/attempts at romance
>anon slowly going crazy and just becoming more and more unhinged
>Anon puts on a show once he figures out how to electricity in Equestria
>Two days later he's contacted by Vinyl Scratch, who fucking funds his ass immediately
>Mares think that a male DJ is super FUCKING hot
>They all want the D
>Mane 6 are concerned for his safety and try to convince him to get away from the bright lights and fast-moving life of the city
Nigga please, if anon is bringing anything with him to Equestria and it's /not/ a solar powered computer loaded with all the knowledge and media of human kind, it must be this:
>Y'all are Applejack, an' you've jus' woken up from the most AMAZING nap you've ever been a part of.
>Better'n fallin' asleep after an honest day's work of apple-buckin'.
>Better'n accidentally drinkin' too much cider and taking a floor-nap.
>The reason it's so wonderful is 'cause yer hubby-tuh-be brought you up tuh yer house and aaallll the way tuh bed.
>Golly, Anawn carryin' y'all tuh bed lahke YOU were the stallion.
>Y'all ain't sure why, but that makes you feel tingly all o'er.
>He had better not get used to it, though.
>Let momma do the heavy lifting, y'hear?
>....Oh, right. Anawn.
>Oh, right! Anawn!
>Oh Great Apple above, did that colt do what y'all THINK he done did?!
>You hop up out of yer covers and start spinning in a circle, trying tuh get a good look at yer privates.
>This goes on fer 'bout ten seconds 'fore yer mind catches up tuh you and you realize jus' how buckin' stupid y'all must look.
>So, you simply sit on yer rump and look down towards yer tight, formally-virginal cooter.
>....Nope, no seed leakin' out from where the Great Apple intended it.
>You take a deep breath through yer nose.
>.....Nope, barely a hint of Anawn's scent.
>Oh well, y'all guess you'll have tuh give it another try.
>Yer an Apple, dammit, and an earth pony tuh boot.
>That means yer stubborn to an unreasonable degree, and yer proud of it.
>Clearly a from-the-front attack ain't working, so y'all need help.
>Maybe you can put on a show of what yer family done be like.
>He'd prolly 'preciate a taste of what he's gettin' himself into.
>You'll bet he'd be happy as a pig in shit if you got Granny tuh show him all the secret Apple family recipes he'll be learning tuh cook!
>An' they said that you'd never amount tuh anything after y'all dropped out after the 4th grade.
>Random ponies on the street.
>Just... just everypony.
>Time tuh show Anon how to be an Apple.
I know, right? Scoots is the best CMC.
>You are Anon, and it feels like somebody is plotting your demise.
>You are now Rainbow Dash, weather reporter and Equestria's Eye in the Sky.
>You're currently circling around Applejack's farm, like the birdpone of prey you are.
>You really wish that you could have done more for Anon, but you've been busy hiding from the ponice.
>Man, fuck da ponice.
>Jay-flying is total bullshit.
>You've been flying for YEARS and there's more than enough sky for everypony, dammit!
>You gotta make it up to Anon
>Gotta make sure he knows that you've got his back.
>Show that you're a TURE friend.
>The turest of friends.
>Maybe even his BEST friend.
>And they say that best friends make best lovers, afterall.
>You mean, MAYBE.
>You don't know.
>You are Anon again
>And you are under assault by a tiny baby horse.
>HNG-levels are off the chart, and heart hasn't reported to brain in over five whole minutes.
>"Say thar, Anawn; are y'all busy tonight?"
>Pfft, what, does this filly think you have a SOCIAL LIFE or something?
"Not at all, Bloomy."
>"Y'all gotsta come fer dinner! Granny's breakin' out all of'er best, oldest recipes!"
>You tried one of their "best, oldest" dishes once.
>You legitimately came in your pants.
>It was very awkward for everybody in the room.
>Then again, Apple dinner implies that Applejack may be there, waiting for you.
>You hate to let the little filly down, but you can smell a trap a mile away.
"I don't know, Apple Bloom. This seems like a bad idea, considering the whole, "marriage" thing with your sister."
>Apple Bloom is not to be deterred, however.
>She breaks out the saddest, poutiest faces you've ever seen her muster.
>"Please, Anawn? Ah really lahke havin' you 'round the farm."
>You can see tears forming at the corners of her eyes.
>Fuck it, FINE.
"....Alright. But just because you're so adorable."
>And before Apple Bloom can protest that she isn't adorable, you scoop her up and plonk her square on your shoulders and being to jog over to Sweet Apple Acres.
>You win THIS round, small child.
>Time skip: Din-din time.
>You are Anon, and you're actually having a legitimately nice dinner.
>You've got Apple Bloom to your left, and Applejack to your right.
>You've also got Granny Smith telling you about the time when the Great Depression found Abraham Lincolt buck-naked on her lawn.
>Also about how in HER day, colts did what they were told and were happier for it.
>You think you like her.
>She's the best combination of old southern charm and genuinely-worrying senility.
>"Ah Don't care whut thuh gov'ment says; Ah don' have tuh hire ziggers if'fin ah don' want ter!"
>Don't ever change, Granny Smith.
>You feel a poke to your right, and look over to see what Applejack wants.
>"Y'all like this apple-glazed cabbage head? Mah great-great-great-grand-aunt, Old Mare Pine Golden Pippin, came up with it."
>It's actually not that bad, all things considering.
"It's delicious, Applejack."
>She seems pleased with your answer.
>"Ah can show you the recipe later, if'fin y'all want. Jus' stay the night an' Ah'll fish out the ol' Apple Family Book of Recipes."
"Sure, I'd love t-Oooooh.... nice try, Applejack."
>She almost got you.
>Applejack turns back to her plate and lightly smacks the table in frustration.
>She sulks in her seat for a few minutes, just watching you eat.
>When she sees you scooping some apple cobbler onto your plate, she pounces.
>"Y'all lahke that? That there done be muh second cousin thrise-removed Razor Russet's prize-winning dish right thar."
>She leans in real close, making you feel uncomfortable.
>"It can all be yer's, Anawn. Y'all know whut y'all gotta do."
>oh god you don't know what the opposite of an erection is, but you've got that.
>Out on nowhere, there's a crash!
>Rainbow Dash has flown in through the window and lands on the dining table, scattering food everywhere.
>Why would she DO that?!
>>"I've got your back, Anon!"
>Well, this evening has turned into a shit-show.
>You scamper out of the house in the ensuing chaos.
Done for tonight, I think.
It's actually very funny and on point too. I was very worried about something dumb at the end with Celestia outtrolling everyone, but no. Sombra is quite good politician and troll himself.
>Show that you're a TURE friend.
I see what you did there.
It's nice to be remembered, even if only by your grammar slip-ups.
So, have the incest-loving pedos fucked off back to their designated shitting streets yet?
>>"Rainbow Dash told me that I need to show you that I can shove things down my throat!"
sorry for >nohooves
Much to Cadence and Shining's horror, the Crystal Ponies are a lot more war-like than their Equestrian counterparts, being from a harsher time.
tl;dr: shit happens, and Anon --who was chilling in the Minotaur Lands-- is taken as the only "war-bride", to be given as 'tribute' to either Cadence, Luna, or Celestia.
Even better is that unlike the minotaurs, he can't understand the ponies, and they him.
>Be Anon in Equestria
>All in all it was a pretty sweet deal when you first got here
>Horses treated you like a king and would do anything for a taste of that hot monkey dick
>Sure, there were downsides
>But you could get past those with effort
>Now though everything has gone to absolute shit
>Other Anons made it through the portal and the first thing they did is fuck everything in sight
>Not only do humans have a reputation of being sluts now, half pony half human monstrosities are everywhere
>Even worse is the fact that the saytr offspring is now breeding with their own human fathers
>Creating a downwards spiral of incest and heresy throughout the entirety of pony culture
>Now even cute little fillies want their holes stuffed by the nearest rod around
>It had finally gotten so bad that you've decided to go to Celestia to try and get these fuckers removed
"Can't you do anything? They've mutilated pony culture into being entirely about incest and satyrs! I just want my RGRE back."
>"Anonymous, while I agree with you we cannot just throw poor stallions back into the Everfree. Where would they go?"
"Can't you just build a town for them away from the rest of us, like a General area they can stay?"
>Celestia internally debates with herself for a moment before replying
>"But what if they do not wish to go?"
"Then make them go to pony prison until they agree to stay in their General area."
>And so it was done, mares were in an outcry about it but stallions were glad to see the back of the child abomination fuckers
>Some refused to stay in their general area and were sent to pony prison
>Protests spiked up about stallions not being able to survive in that enviroment but they were free to leave at any time
>Pony towns eventually went back to the norm of minor sexism and everything was good as the satyrs turned their town into a shithole
I wonder how things would go if Anon had a more "old-time"-view of women, being an ultra-sexist mans man, telling the mares to stay in the kitchen, bemoaning the fact that they've elected a female mayor (and that mares are allowed to vote).
Ponies don't know how to deal with this uppity, stallionist colt who wants mares to act like stallions.
I mostly want to see this to see the chaos of their polar views as Anon treats the mares as they usually treat him in these stories.
Any Dashie can save that poor stallion from himself
Are you the hurdy gurdy guy? Is your mission here to bring us interesting musical things?
>He starts dating Vinyl
>They take turns DJing and partying
>She's worried about him becoming a typical party colt, like the last few she had
>But Anon would never do that to her and worries the same about her
I just want more green with Vinyl.
Oh god. Humans are the niggers of poneworld.
>Come in droves
>Fuck everything in sight
>Local populace start fetishizing them and spouting out how good at sex they are
>They leave bastard children all over the place
>Government gives them their own places to live
>Them and their offspring occasionally trickle out and start fucking everyone they can
Anyway, good allegory. I like allegories.
I'd like to see this too.
I was thinking about /pol/ in Equestria the other day.
Nah, man. This has been my only general for a couple of months.
I don't even want to bring up satyrs as they cause this.
This (unfortunately unfinished) fic could be turned into a nice RGRE story-
Did Shukaku decide who gonna be Venus' new mom?
Cuz I have a candidate.
>Anon starts hang out with TreeHugger.
>All pones think she's a bad company and Anon can get in trouble with her.
She was so unconcerned so I don't know how she could be a bad company.
Wake me up when the degenerates die off, ok?
We can't wake you when you're dead, Anon. Stop being boring, for your own sake.
>>Wake me up when the degenerates die off
>We can't wake you when you're dead, Anon.
Hah, I get it. Funny joke. Everypony laughs.
I'm okay with this.
Think she can bend steel with those eyebrows?
What if Anon doesn't take a wife? He remains a single male father for the whole story.
no, this does not mean I'm doing this for sure, it's just a possibility, however small.
Also, I'm interested in seeing who people actually want as a mom to Venus. Attach suggestions to this post and I'll make a poll.
I want to see her confrontation with Cadence.
>I want to see her confrontation with Cadence.
Oh shit, I hadn't thought of that. Luna might understand why alicorn pregnancies have to be carried to term given how old she is. Throw in some weird species superiority thing, make her come complex than muh husbando, and you've sold me.
She's about 8 years younger than Anon though. By the time she's of legal age (ignoring cocksock stuff) Venus will be CMC age.
One of my favourite weird headcanons.
Apple family firstborns have always been males, since almost the recorded history of the apple family. Until "big mac". She has to pretend to be a colt to not bring discrace to the ponyville line of the apple family.
Eris should be the mother.
There's not enough Eris
>Ignoring your cocksocks.
You should know better than this.
I'd rather see him with someone because it carries the implication that he managed to move on.
I'd love to see Applejack, since family is so important to her that I can only imagine her reaction to candybutt coming back after abandoning Venus
I also think Derpy would be interesting, two flawed people coming together to form a family
and Venus possibly having a sister in dinky
rando crystal empire pony would add political intrigue, since it basically means Cadence is pulling a prima nocte.
Ignore the rest of this post because it involves a previous candidate
>Luna despises Cadence for wanting to throw a possible alicorn away because she didn't feel like having a foal
>most likely after ages of wanting a foal of her own
>loves Venus as her own, but has mixed feelings about anon giving cadence a foal before she did
>acutely aware of anon's growing anxiety from the situation due to his dreams/nightmares
>get a sequence where she hops into everyone's dreams one night to see how they really feel without a front
>part of anon just wants to help cadence so she can have a happy family, but he's so afraid of losing Luna. Just absolutely terrified, and he doesn't want to hurt her or break her heart in any way. Worried what Venus will think of him.
>ends with a feelsy conversation with Venus, mother to daughter
Applejack and Bacon horse have the same problem as Twilight. They're about 8 or 10 years younger than Anon.
Derpy is a grey area, but she seems like a pony from cloudsdale who moved to ponyville, And Anon will mostly remain in Canterlot.
A loving step-mother would create conflict.
First, between her and Venus until or if Venus accepts the 'interloper' in her and Anon's lives, and secondly between the step-mother and Venus against Cadence, when Love Horse takes a prominent role later on in the story, again.
I personally vote Luna if she's to be introduced when Venus is a teenager, or a mare like Fleur or even Cheerilee if it's when Venus is young.
While having Luna be the mom makes sense for Celestia being the aunt, I want both of them to be aunties. Celestia is the cool one who spoils Venus, while Luna is the tougher but still loving aunt who bonds with Venus whenever she finds out that they share a common interest in something.
I'm rooting for Fleur.
Some characters will never get any green unless you type it yourself. She's one of them.
I hope it will be old-fashioned fedora tipping Luna.
Welp, it looks like we're going to see Luna turning Cadence into a fine paste.
Can't beat the classic
Since moonhorse won the poll, I'll get ideas down of how to fit her in.
Since it is moonhorse, however, she's not likely to come into the story for a bit.
Speaking of ideas, some just hit me.
Throw caution to the wind, Anon. This is your time to shine.
It's not like a colt would get arrested for touching himself in public, anyway.
You know, on a non-related note:
NMM's return is imminent, and Twilight panics like in canon, etcetera...
But, contrary to Celestia's expectations, her off-screen kidnapping by her deranged sister doesn't occur, so she ends up being where she was supposed to in the celebration plans (in canon, NMM appeared at this point: "Stay back, you foals!").
So, while raising the sun, Celestia's keeping a wary eye out.
And then the sun's rays hit some point visible like a hill, and she sees her sister, Luna and not Nightmare Moon, happily being banged by an ape-thing, Anon.
Yeah, turns out her banishment lasted for about a hundred years on another world, where she met Anon, her future husband (they later got married on Earth).
He basically fucked/romanced the anger out of her, and they're happily married/in love -- the last 900 years has been a massive honeymoon for them, and as a result she's pretty modern and well-adjusted.
Celestia's happy that her sister is back, free of her jealousy/Nightmare, albeit married which she's wary of/him.
But, Luna's original issue that she was unappreciated by ponies remains, though she's no longer bitter nor angry: Celestia wants her to retake her throne and resume her duties, but Luna's like, pft, fuck that and those ungrateful assholes, much to 'Tia's shock. Luna's more interested in settling down and having foals.
So, while they adjust to pony society and find a flat in Canterlot, ponies as a whole not only have to get used to the idea that Celestia has a sister, another Princess, but that she's also more like a regular mare than idol who likes to lay on the couch, drink beer and eat pizza.
Conflicts would be their finding jobs in RGRE, given that they've got Western, gender-equal attitudes; Anon being flirted with by mares; Celestia trying to lure her sister back to the Thrones while also trying to come to terms about her new brother-in-law and her sister's attitudes; culture shock, mostly.
"Uh, babe?" Anon said, looking around, his pelvic-thrusts slowing. "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."
Luna blinked. "Oh, hi Celly! You're, er, not catching us at our best."
Celestia stared, open mouthed... as did the horde of ponies behind her.
"Anon, meet my sister, Celestia; Celestia, Anon."
"Nice to meet you at last," he said, smiling, offering his hand. Celestia looked down at it and drew back a fetlock, grimacing.
MFW I read the rest of the thread, and realized I missed the shot.
"Oh, what. You're gonna act all squeamish?"
>"I. . . Of course!"
"Princess, please. Luna lost at Presidents and Assholes last weekend, and she talks when she gets silly. She told me allll about your first alicorn hea. . ."
>"'Tis true, sister. I was the asshole."
My headcanon is that Sunset is around the same age as Shining and Cadence, but time moves A LOT slower in the EqG universe.
So it's been less time for her than it has been for Twilight, so there is less of an age gap between them.
"Love, don't even think of suggesting a threesome."
"But Lu," said Anon, pouting, "we have one every Tuesday!"
"Yes," the love of his life said, "but this is my sister! Sacrosanct! ... And a complete prude."
"Fine, fine. Plus, you were right, she's all plot and no teats."
>"Indeed. 'Tis quite tragic. Now resume the vigorous predatory plowing of my overwhelmed herbivorous holes. You promised to dehydrate me, and I will hold you to that."
>Meanwhile, all of Ponyville watches this exchange between Celestia, the new alicorn and the apelien.
"It has come to my attention that you're with somepony else now, Anon. Is this true?"
>Sitting at the other side of the table, Anonymous rolled his eyes pretentiously.
>He was visibly annoyed by your question.
>"I don't see why should you even care, but yes, yes that's true."
>Truthfully, you were.
>You plan to meet and befriend his wife, who's at the same time your daughter's stepmother.
>It will be one of your first steps, into Venus good graces.
"C.. Can I get to know her?"
>Anon took a sip of his lukewarm coffee and sighed audibly.
>He turned his head toward the corridor and shouted.
>"Honey! Can you come to the kitchen for a moment!"
>A strange, loud bark was heard in Anon's house.
>Before you could even think about it, a large Timberwolf walked inside the kitchen.
>What the buck!
>You stood up immediately, your horn ablaze with offensive magic.
"Anon, look out! There's a Timberwolf behind you!"
>He looked at you as if you were touched in the head.
>"That's my wife, Cadence! What's wrong with you!?"
>You were dumbfounded.
"M-Me? Y-Your w.. WHAT!?"
>Anon glared at you, shuting you up.
>The large canine walked up to him and nuzzled his cheek with its erm... hers wooden head.
>"Honey, meet Cadence, she's Venus... egg donor."
>You've flatten your ears in shame.
>Mrs. Timberwolf looked at you with her glowing green eyes and started growling dangerously.
>Anon moved his hand and pet her on the neck.
>"Easy, darling. There's no need to get angry."
>She fell silent, but was still looking at you... accusingly?
>H-How dare she judge you!
>That... that pile of sticks and leaves!
>You need to stay calm and salvage this somehow.
"Anon, this is a bucking Timberwolf!"
>Nice save Cadence, buck you!
>Anon's gaze hardened.
>"Cadence I'm gonna have to ask you, to get the fuck out of my house. NOW!"
>Your plan failed, ain't it?
>"Nearly a millennia and I still have trouble understanding your attraction to breasts, lover."
"Tits, Luna. Hooters, fun-bags--"
>"Yes yes," she says, rolling her eyes, "why else would I wear those fiendish contraptions women suffer on a daily basis?"
"Because you look hot in them and I do that thing you like but I don't?"
>She pauses. "Good point."
>All through this conversation Anon has continuously rutted Luna, pausing only when she orgasms to help her ride it out.
>The interspecies coupling couple have been going at it for a good ten minutes, and while the newly returned lunar princess is looking ragged, though pleased, her sister and the citizenry are a mixture of aghast, incredulous, and aroused.
>Anon smacks his hand against one dark flank, enjoying the Luna's response: a half-groan and knicker from her throat, and a hard milking from her vag.
"So. . . I polished off a bottle of Evan Williams before this all started."
>Celestia's mouth opens and closes, but no words come out.
>A series of muted splashes are heard from the crowd
"That is to say, we'll be at this for a while. Could someone hook a brother up and get some gatorade, or water or something?"
>The darker diarch shudders in pleasure again, as her lover pounds another orgasm out of her divine form.
>Anon grips his hand around her tail, and waves his other hand in front of Celstias face.
"Yo, Celestia. A little help? Lulu's right, I do owe her a marathon session tonight and I'll need to stay hydrated if I'm gonna have anything to give her for breakfast."
>"Uh, Auntie Luna?"
>You glance over to your uncomfortable-looking niece and her paramour.
>"I thought a 'double-date night' would involve us bowling or going to the theater, not..."
>Your beloved chimes in: "Pizza, beer, and horror flicks?"
>Cadence winces as a pony on-screen is decapitated, spraying blood over her terrified friends.
>"Oh come on, that's so fake! Where's the twitching, the rasping from the severed heads!"
>Shining Armour looks particularly pale now.
>Huh. Colts are a lot more squeamish these days, it seems.
I wish there was a way to filter anthro, humanized and a few other tags.
Yeah, there's a story that hits a lot of my buttons but its anthro'd to hell and back so it's confusing for my boner. If it was straight human or pone, I would be powering the eastern seaboard by the power of my fapping.
swollen mammory tissue is a visible sign of estrus in most or all mammals. Human breasts are the result of "runaway" sexual selection which started with females developing pads of fat which made them appear fertile when they aren't.
so ponies should probably react to anon's breast attraction less "WTF??" and more "he wants to start a family/ that boy is baby-crazy"
Does Rarity sell pretty teat bras?
>"Twilight... I don't think that of this a very good idea..."
>It had been approximately twenty one minutes and thirty-three seconds since your husband and brother had left for parts unknown
>In that time you and the other girls had gotten quite a bit done
>Every door in the castle was magically barricaded and sealed
>Every hall and every room had the most powerful detection and listening charms known to magic placed strategically all over them
>You had even used your magic to turn some pots and pans that you had in the kitchen into battle ready helmets
>But even with all of the stuff that you and everypony else did, even after making treebrary 2.O into an actual fortress, you didn't feel very safe
>Not even a little bit
>By now the girls had come to their senses and you could see that they very much regretted what they said
>They realized that they had bucked up and they had bucked up bad
>Just like you they were jumping at very sound and eyeing every shadow
>You could see the shame on their faces and you could see it by the way that they walked and talked
>You could see shame and fear
>Every single one of you knew that all of these spells and charms could only get you so far with those two stallions
>You knew that with enough time and preparation Shining could bypass every little thing you did and walst into this castle if he wanted to
>Your bbbff could be behind you RIGHT now and you wouldn't even know it
>Fortunately, and unfortunately, you didn't have to worry about Anon sneaking into the castle to give you your comeuppance
>Nope, the light of your life would stomp up to your front door and start tearing into the castle with a sledge hammer while shouting obscenities at the top of his lungs
>And, to be honest, you didn't know which you'd prefer at this point
>You just HATED this waiting!
>It was just like waiting for a doctor to give you a shot
>You knew that the pinch was coming
>You could feel them moving that point toward you
>But you just didn't know WHEN it was gonna poke you!
>Why didn't you just knock some sense into these mares when you had the chance?
>If you would have apologized you'd all probably be sitting in the living room listening to Anon and Shining as they told you about their trip!
>Anon would have been petting your RIGHT NOW!
>He might have even done that thing with your ears that you really like!
>...What a load of horse apples...
"I think you're right, Moony," you say, looking at everypony
>Not one of them could look you in the eye
>You might have bucked up by not speaking out but now it's time to say something
>Time to end this nonsense so all of you can go and apologize
>...And maybe take a shower
>...Maybe more than one shower...
"So how about it girls? How about we go out and find our husbands and tell them that weren't sorry for being a bunch of oat heads?"
>"But we just finished fortifying the castle," Sunset muttered, rubbing her shoulder
>You all shuffle around, waiting for somepony else to speak up
>You had floated the idea out there, hopefully the girls would run with it so you didn't have to cower in your own bucking house!
>"The Great and Powerful Trixie is wearing a POT on her head," Trixie finally said, looking at each and everyone of you. "Trixie doesn't know about you girls but she thinks that this has gone on long enough."
>"Aye," Luna said with a nod, her pot-helmet very nearly falling off of her head. "Tis barely an hour and the colts have us ready to jump out of our fur."
>"There's nopony better at the mind games than stallions," Cadence agreed, lifting pot-helmet off of her head and tossing it away
>Though Starlight and Celestia said nothing you could see both of them looking at you with half smiles
>You sighed again, this time in relief
>Thank goodness that this wasn't going to get out of hoof!
"Alright then, why don't we--"
>"NOW WHAT THE HELL DID YOU GUYS DO? THERE'S NOT EVEN A FUCKING FRONT DOOR ANYMORE!"
>You all jumped, looking at each other with wide eyes
>"It looks like we have no need to look for our stallions, girls," Celestia said with a nervous giggle
>You all looked over toward the window
>"Yeah, I think you're right," Moony said, pushing her glasses up her muzzle
>None of you said a thing as you slowly shuffled out of the room and go into the other room so you could get out onto your balcony
>When you poked your heads outside you saw one heck of a sight
>Anon had a big oaken barrel slung over his shoulder and he was pouring water into this giant kiddie pool-sized tub
>There were about seven other barrels behind him with a little plastic table and two plastic chairs right next to those
>Shining was standing next to Anon sporting what looked like a bunch of bottles of shampoo along with a bunch of other bathroom accessories
>"Did you manage to get that oatmeal coconut soap?" Anon asked, setting down the barrel when the tub was all filled up
>"And I managed to get that special brand of mane and shoulders and that medicated shampoo that you wanted," Shining said, staring at your husband with a smile
>Anon grunted with a shake of his head
>"Good, if you so much as come near Sunny with any other kind of soap she'll break into a rash. And don't get me started with how bad Trixie's mane starts flaking when you don't make her use her shampoo everyday."
>"Do you think that we got enough green tea for Twilight to soak in? I remember when she was little how she'd lose clumps of fur if you didn't make her soak in it at least once a month."
>"She's gonna have to deal with what we managed to get. Even when I order that shit ahead of time they never give me enough."
>Once again a small crowd of ponies started to form within ear shot of Anon and Shining
>Many of them were smiling, looking up at you and the girls as your husband's casually talked about your special hygiene needs...
>Right out there were everypony could hear them...
Was it getting hot out here?
>You felt a little hot under the collar...
>Making a face, Shining tossed some kind of powder into the water
>"I know what you mean! You know I was at the store one time to get tear free shampoo for Starlight because everything else hurts her eyes and they were out! And when I asked one of the salesponies when they were going to get some in stock they said that they didn't sell the bubble gum scent that she liked in the extra large bottles anymore!"
>You found yourself blushing in embarrassment as Anon let out a noise of disgust
>"You think that that's bad? I tried to get those fine-tooth brushes at the store the other day since Celly and Moony's manes like to fro up after they bathe and they started selling just those shitty all plastic ones! How the hell is a plastic brush going to be able to deal with all of that hair?"
>"If you think that that's bad you should hear about what I was trying to get my Luna the other--"
>"ENOUGH!" Luna roared, about as red as the rest of you were. "The commoners do not need to know about our... problem."
>"You mean the thing that Shining had to--"
>"Aye, THAT thing, Starlight. Nowhushupright now!"
>Glaring at her herd mate for a moment longer, Luna then turned her attention back to Anon and Shining
>Both of whom were smiling
>Your nose scrunched up at the sight
>Ohhhh! You'd bet your horn that they knew that you were there the whole time!
>"Anonymous, husband, might We as why thou hast a tub of water prepared?"
>"Where the buck did they even get all that stuff?" Starlight muttered, leaning over the railing to get a better look. "They weren't even gone all that long..."
>Celestia looked at the whole set up with worry
>"Never dismiss a stallion's resourcefulness, much less our stallions."
>Anon's grin widened, his canines flashing in the sun
>"I got you girls a bath ready," he chirped, slapping the wooden tub. "Me and Shining went out and got all of the stuff you needed and everything!"
>Reaching into his pocket Anon pulled out a little rubber dick and tossed it into the tub
>The duck bobbed in the water a few times before settling in the middle, it's little duck face...
>...That wasn't the right word but for some reason it was the first word you thought of
>The second one was SINISTER...
>That was a sinister little duck...
>"Now come on, the water might not be the warmest in the world but it's the best that you're going to get."
>You could hear a pin drop as you all milled over Anon's words and their implications
>Did he really think?...
>He wasn't going to...
"You want us to take a bath out in the middle of the street?!" you blurted out, covering your teats with your hooves
>You needed to protect them from your husband's twisting
>His rough, painful twisting
>"I want you to take a bath, I want you to brush your teeth, and I want you to get your horns and hooves filed since I bet you all haven't done that since we left either," Anon said with a nod
>You could hear some of the townsponies openly laughing now but you ignored them
>You all had more important things to focus on
>Like your crazy husband for one
>"You... you have to be pulling our leg," Cadence said. "Shining, honey, you're not going to make us do this are you?"
>"Hey!" Sunset snapped, shoving the pink mare. "Don't you bucking try to get out of this because you're in a different herd!"
>"Unlike your husband my hubby is a bit more rational. He'd never make us do something like that."
>Smiling, Cadence looked down at her husband
>Shining smiled, and Starlight, Cadence, and Luna smiled along with him
>You could see the hope in their eyes as they waited for their stallion's answer
>You and the other girls might have been up the creek without a paddle with Anon but if they played their cards right then maybe they could get out of this
>"Nope. You girls are all going down together on this one. Sorry."
>If you weren't in the same situation as Cadence and her girls you might have started laughing when you saw their hopeful looks shatter into a million pieces
>Not in a mean way mind you
>More of a "you tried to flake out and it bit you in the butt" kind of way
>"W-WHAT?! Come on Shining!"
>Shining shook his head
>"Anon's right, you girls weren't too nice to your husbands when you saw them and now you gotta pay the price. Them's the breaks."
>"Alright then," Anon said, slapping his tub of doom again. "Now who wants to go first?"
>Celestia gently brushed past you and Starlight and leaned over the balcony
>"Husband, might I have a word with you for a moment?" she asked diplomatically
>Anon hummed, thinking her request over for a few seconds, before he nodded
>"Sure. Speak away Sunny Buns."
>Your old teacher turned a little red at the pet name but she smiled nonetheless
>"Thank you Anon. Now, I understand that you're more than a little upset, and you have every right to be. We didn't do our chores, we neglected our personal hygiene, and we told you to hit the road so we could finish our game."
>Celestia sounded a little melancholy saying this and you and a few of the girls looked away from your husbands in shame
>That doesn't sound that great when somepony says it out loud...
>"The girls and I," she said, gesturing toward you, Sunset, Trixie, and Moondancer, "shouldn't have treated you like that. It was wrong and we were all raised better than that. You are our stallion, and we should do everything in our power to prove it. You deserve our love and respect, not what we did to you. So I, along with everypony else standing up here, wish to apologize to both you and Shining for our egregious behavior."
>Many of the stallions watching this play out awed
>Though she did her best to hide it, Trixie wiped a tear from her eye
>That was the best, most perfect thing that she could have said
>It was humble, heartfelt, and honest
>You wouldn't have thought of saying ANYTHING like that in a million years
>Even your husband, who had been twisting your teats like he had been born to do it (which he probably was, the crazy apelien) was wearing a genuinely happy smile
>"...You know what, hon? I appreciate that you stepped up to the plate and apologized, and better yet I'm glad that you did that AND you weren't just pulling it out of your ass. It takes a lot of courage to admit when you were in the wrong, and I accept your apology."
>Still smiling Anonymous tapped the side of the tub with his finger
>"Now come down here for your bath. I can smell you from here."
>Faster than the eye could see Celestia's smile vanished off of her face
>"But hon, now that we got that silliness out of the way--"
>"You are NOT using our shower," Anon interrupted with a shake of his head. "The smell would linger in our bathroom for god knows how long."
>You hadn't thought of that!
>The fledgling hope that you might have actually been saved vanished as you stared at the tub of water
>In your mind's eye you could see yourself sitting in that tub getting scrubbed down by Anon with all of those ponies watching...
>You'd be a laughingstock
>You and all of the other girls
>Whenever you showed your faces in town they'd say that you were a bunch of whipped mares that did everything that their stallions said
>You might not have been a drowning in cock alpha but you had a little respect amongst the populace
>But if your husband dumped you into a tub like a naughty foal and bathed you...
>Oh sweet stars no!
>"Come on girls," Shining said, beckoning you all with a hoof. "Let's get this out of the way so I can get in there and sanitize the horse apples out of Anon's house."
>Celestia bit her lip
>"Are you sure that I can't dissuade you?"
>She wiggled her rump, her eyes half lidded
>"The girls and I could give you the welcome you deserve~"
>That was it!
>You could bribe Anon with sex!
>SEX WAS THE ANSWER!
>Shining and Anon looked at each other before throwing back their heads and laughing their flanks off
>Not two seconds later many of the stallions watching started laughing as well
>Why does that never work?...
>"You think you're getting any cock after telling me to piss off?" Anon said in between giggles. "Apology or not you and the girls are in the doghouse, Sunny Buns. You're gonna have to work for this dick for a little while now."
>"Are you sure?" Trixie asked, shoving Celestia out of the way. "Trixie can do that thing with her mouth that you like! As long as Trixie doesn't have to bathe outside like... like some kind of animal!"
>"You are an animal, babe. same as me."
>He spread his arms out wide
>"Now come on and let's get you cleaned up. After we're finished I'll give you a hug and a kiss and everything."
>Luna's nose scrunched up
>Unfurling her wing she took off into the air, swooping down and landing right on the railing next to Trixie
>"We art Princess Luna: Lady of the Night and the Protector of Dreams!"
>Snorting, Luna looked down at the two stallions, her lips pulling back into a snarl
>"In ages past we spent lifetimes fighting beings which melted the minds of mortals with their very PRESENCE! WE ART NOT!--"
>Rolling his eyes, Shining's horn flashed with a burst of magic
>Luna stopped mid rant with a yelp, lurching forward dangerously
>You all cried out, trying to reach for her so she didn't fall off the balcony
>Thankfully Cadence managed to grab her tail with her mouth and yank her back onto the platform
>Unfortunately Luna, in her panic, began to flail her wings around
>One of these wings smacked Trixie right on the back of the head, sending her tumbling off the balcony and toward the ground
>Five horns sparked to life, intend on grabbing Trixie and pulling her back toward safety, but Shining was too fast
>His horn sparked to life and you and the girls found yourselves encased in a bubble
>It wasn't a very powerful barrier but it was more than enough to break your concentration
"TRIXIE!" you yelled in panic
>"TRIXIE BLAMES SPARKLE FOR THIS!" Trixie yelled, closing her eyes and bracing herself for her impact with the earth
>Watching his wife fall in bemusement, Anon extended his arms and caught the magician with little effort
>"Trixie, it's fine."
>"You're not falling anymore you silly horse. You can stop screaming now."
>Trixie's mouth snapped up and she looked up at Anon
>You all look down at her in horror
>"Trixie, run!" Cadence yelled
>"G-Get away from h-him!" Moondancer called
>"Run zigga run!" Sunset cried
>Everypony standing up on the balcony gave her a look before once again looking down at the light blue mare
>...Bucking racists Sunset...
>Trixie blinks slowly, her rear legs resting on her chest as Anon looked down at her
>You could see the gears churning in her head
>Though the girls were yelling you knew that Trixie had no chance to get away
>Shining could make a barrier if she tried to hoof it and you knew what Anon could do if she tried to teleport or try to get away with her magic
>Anyway that you looked at it Trixie was going to get in the tub
>You knew it, the girls knew it, the bystanders watching the clusterbuck knew it, and so did Trixie
>The magician's eyes narrowed and her muzzle scrunched up
>Though her end was in sight Trixie did not beg
>She did not plea
>She did not back down
>The Great and Powerful Trixie was going to meet her fate like a mare, her head held right and her chest tuft fluffy and silky
>See you space, cowgirl
>You and the other girls could do nothing but watch as Anon tossed your herd mate into the tub of water, ripped her sweater and socks off, and started scrubbing her down
>While normally any of you would have LOVED to have your stallion's hoof spiders all over you it looked like he wasn't being all that gentle with poor Trixie
>In fact, if you didn't know any better, you'd have said that Anon was trying to drown her
>"HEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPP! SOMEPONY HELP TRIXIE!"
>"Twilight," Celestia said, eerily calm. "I do believe that we have some more fortifying to do."
>"SAVE TRIXIE! SPARKLE! OERIGNEORINER! SPPPPPAAAAAARRRRRRRKKKLLLLLLEEEEE! SAVE TRI--DFJNEORNWRIN!"
"Yeah... I think that we could stand to to put up a few more spells," you muttered
>"And I'm sure there's some furniture we could use to block some of the hallways."
>You all nodded, stepping away from the balcony
>"TRIXIE SEES YOU--RFJEKVWVEF! SAVE ME! SAVE ME DAMMI-DAFVBEFVEVEIN!"
>"Are you sure that this outfit doesn't make me look fat? I swear I feel like a stuffed sausage in this thing!"
>You look up from your meal-- the first half decent one that you've gotten in two fucking weeks-- and at your brother-in-law
"It makes you look fat, Shining," you say, stuffing a slice of pizza in your mouth. "It makes you look huge, titanic, the biggest, fattest stallion that I've ever laid eyes on."
>Shining's nose scrunched up
>"It makes you look fat, Shining," you say, stuffing a slice of pizza in your mouth. "It makes you look huge, titanic, the biggest, fattest stallion that I've ever laid eyes on."
>Shining's nose scrunched up
You're wearing a fatsuit, Shining.
>"Well you aren't supposed to say that! You're supposed to tell me that I look great! Slimmer than most stallions!"
"No, that's what a FRIEND would say, my dear Shiny," you correct, reaching over the table and ruffling the stallion's mane. "The two of us are KIN. It's my sworn duty to take the piss out of you whenever I can."
>Huffing, though you could see a little smile on his face, Shining started to fiddle around with his vest again
>"I swear that no matter what I do I just keep gaining weight--"
"I recall you declining whenever I ask you if you want to work out or go to the gym."
>"--I've tried every diet that I can think of--"
"For two weeks."
>"--I took that pilates class for MONTHS."
"You didn't even take it for a week before storming out of the place after that one stallion said that your headband looked tacky."
>Sputtering, Shining once again looked up at you, her snoser scrunching to dangerous levels
>"We all can't eat anything we want and be lazy like YOU, Anon!" he snapped. "SOME of us have to work to get the bodies we want!"
>Wasn't this the same little horse that just ate two whole cheese pizzas by himself?
>Thank god he was on his hooves a lot, otherwise he'd be as wide as he was tall
>Rolling your eyes you finished up your last slice of pizza and stood up
"You look fine you big baby," you say, booping his nose. "I don't even know why the hell you changed out of that weird blanket thing to wear a vest to a pizza place but whatever."
>Fishing out a small bag of bits you toss them onto the table
"I think that I'm gonna go and hit the hay. I'm kinda beat after that train ride and all that wife tormenting."
>Pushing in your chair you grin at your brother-in-law
>"Don't you go and buy another pizza ya hear? You don't want to be rolling out of this place do ya?"
>You laugh as Shining throws obscenities at you as you leave the pizza place
>Shining might have been a bro but Christ above was he a little too easy to tease
>It didn't make it any less fun though
>Walking out into the night you put your hands in your pockets and make your way toward the hotel that you and Shining were staying at for the time being
>After your wives had watched you cleaning Trixie up not only did they not want you in the house but they made the place even MORE impenetrable
>The dirty horses didn't want to get clean it seemed
>And that meant that you were in the long haul with this
>Which was fine; you and Shining would pick them off one by one, spreading fear and terror in their ranks, cutting off their food supplies, and generally making their lives a heck of a lot harder
>And when you got them to their lowest point the two of you were going to rip through their ranks and crush them beneath you feet like the insects that they were
>Isn't marriage grand?
>You don't know what Shining thought about the whole business but you thought it was a fucking hoot!
>Eventually you made it back to the humble but cozy hotel at the end of town and make your way into your room
>There, waiting for you with a big ol' frown on her face, was the Great and Powerful Trixie
>Or, as you had been calling her, the Clean and Hygienic Trixie
>She didn't like it when you called her that
>So you did your best to use the title whenever you could
>Magician hoers had changed out of that grimy and nasty sweat shirt of hers (which Shining burned) along with those socks of hers (which Shining also burned) for a PJ top and some nice pink socks
>"Husband," she grumbled as you started kicking off your shoes
"Wife," you say teasingly. "Did you get that pizza that we ordered for you?"
>Trixie nodded as you sat down beside her on the bed
>"Yes, the Great and Powerful Trixie got the pizza," she said, leaning against you. "And Trixie would like to thank you for the food. Trixie was famished."
>You run your fingers through your thankfully now-clean wife's mane
>Trixie sighed, leaning against you just a hair more
"Good. Are you ready for bed?"
>Trixie nodded, and allowed you to pick her up and place her underneath the covers
>Shedding your clothing you crawled in after her, wrapping your arms around her barrel and pulling her close
>The two of you sighed as you buried your face into her mane and closed your eyes
>You cracked open an eye
>"Trixie... I'm sorry that me and the girls told you off today."
>Chuckling, you kissed the top of your silly horse's head
"Water under the bridge, my little pony," you said. "But if it makes you feel any better dunking you in that water sure made up for your nonsense."
>You chuckled again, this time just a bit louder
"You're gonna get shit for that for as long as you live."
>Though she had her back to you you KNEW that she was frowning
>"...The Great and Powerful Trixie wishes to take back her apology."
>You kissed the back of her head again, closing your eyes
"I love you too, hon."
>Making a disgusted noise, Trixie turned off the lights with a spell and settled down for the night
>"Trixie loves you too, human. She doesn't like it but she loves you too."
Alright, one down. Done for the night
Oh, and fair warning, I started school today and as such my updates might just be a bit slower until I get my shit in order.
Loved it. Could you tone down the caps lock lines though?
Not been here long, but... An offering
>Be hungry Anon.
>It's like regular Anon, but with no food in the house.
>Having checked through every cupboard, found nothing more filling than a teabag, you decided you might have to switch schedule, and had headed to market a day early.
>Not a real problem for you, but you hadn't finished unloading the firewood from your cart, and so were stuck lugging everything by hand.
>BECAUSE REAL MEN DO IT IN ONE!
"Look AJ, I swear I'm fine. But can you just put the jam in the bag for me?"
>"No can do, pardner. I ain't never goin through a stallion's bag before, and I ain't gonna start now"
>"Anon, do you need a hoof with that~"
>Here we go again.
>Twiggles is here.
>"Just Twilight, Anon, I told you~"
>Her horn lights up, sparks flickering up and down the overglow, and a similar light forms around the jar of apple jam.
>The market falls silent.
>Mares find their eyes drawn to Twilight, and her massive, throbbing spell structure.
>Stallions fall to the ground, dazzled by the maresculinity on show.
>That creepy DJ and Sweetie start bobbing their heads at each other, rubbing spiralled horn against spiralled horn.
>The jar lifts into the air, and drifts towards your open bag, settling nicely on top of a bundle of celery.
>At your words, the spell overloads, splashing sparks and drifting waves across the market.
>Rarity falls forward, tail-tip touching the back of her neck.
>Lyra seems to just relocate to the ground, but horizontal.
>Both with much less impressive waves of magic pouring from their horns.
>Twilight looks up at you,
>"Oh no, Anon,"
>The DJ rears up, and pounds her chest with her little hooves
>The sun comes crashing down, and a massive eruption of mana from Canterlot takes its place in the sky.
>She finally collapses, more magic leaking out.
>You scratch your head, and go home, carefully stepping over the discharge.
>Fucking ponies, mang
As always, enjoying your work LaP.
The only thing is that it can be hard to split up who is talking, because they're all nerdy unicorns (or princesses). But scriptstyle statements for that don't work.
I really hope that Shukaku's story time skips up until Cadence wants to reconnect. While it would be cute to see this filly grow up, I feel like the real meat of the story would be waiting for when the family drama bomb nukes everyone's lives.
>You gulp as you and Anon enter your private set up area of the performance hall.
>Audibly apparently, judging by how Anon has turned to look at you with a questioning look on his face.
>You shoot him a nervous smile.
>Anon smiles back in return, a genuine one, one that makes you forget your anxiety for just a moment.
>He kneels down and places a hand on your withers, "Hey, don't stress. We haven't even gotten started yet."
"Oh Anonymous that certainly doesn't reassure me of anything!" you whine, "We have to check all your clothing for even the slightest imperfection-"
>Anon opens his mouth, only to close it as you continue.
"Ensure Caramel's matching model photos are all in order of your outfit changes-"
>He again opens his mouth.
"Then there's the matter of making any changes on the fly based on our competition an-"
>A warm digit finds itself on your muzzle, effectively silencing you.
>"Rarity," Anon says with a soothing tone, "We've been through how many shows together?"
>You begin to speak, Anon curls his finger over the top of your lips and pinches the bottom one with his thumb, "That was rhetorical Rara."
>You scrunch your muzzle, he knows that name irks you so, Anon chuckles at your displeasure "My point is that we've been through plenty, together. This is just another show to display your fall line at."
>You magic his hand away.
"Just another show?! Anonymous! This is THE most intense fashion show of the YEAR!"
"Don't you get all "whatever" with me mister! This show is the one to make or break a designer AND their model. My shop could literally explode or collapse based on how we do here today"
>Anon merely smirks at you, his performances have certainly boosted his ego since you both started doing shows, to the point that he's developed a mare's over-inflated sense of confidence.
>This little reminder should burst that troublesome ego, and maybe now he can have the proper attitude about the gravity of this event.
"A full five minute showcase with no breaks in between? It's nothing that all the rehearsing in the world could prepare one for-"
>You can feel your rear legs begin to tremble and a weight forming in your stomach.
"Oh dear... whatever got the silly notion to enter into this show into our minds in the first place!?"
>You are full on panicki-
>A warmth begins to grow on your cheek.
>You blink and find that Anon's hand is cupping your face.
>His warm smile remains plastered on his face, "We decided to go for it because we're the best Rarity."
>You think back to the last fashion show you both entered, how perfectly your designs looked on his and the stallion model's bodies.
>How he so expertly worked the fun and professional angles of your outfits.
>How, after celebrating getting the cover-page of Allure Magazine with, what you understand now to have been too much wine, you decided to enter into the Prench Fashion Showcase.
"We went for it because we were drunk" you huff.
>Anon laughs, "Yeah, but also because we're the best."
>You smile to yourself, his confidence can be so infectious...
>You yelp as a faint sting makes itself present on your rump, the pain was simultaneous with a muffled smack sound.
>"Now come on, let's get started huh?"
>You keep your head low to hide the blush growing on your face.
>It takes a little more concentration than usual to levitate your clipboard over.
>Little fantasies repeatedly pop up in your mind.
>The most prominent being Anon, the exotic model he is, falling for you over all his other, and better, prospects.
>You let out a sigh as you remind yourself that they are merely fantasies.
>"Got the list ready?"
>You peek over your clipboard to your handsome partner, the one who's begun to draw the attention of several bigger names both professionally and romantically.
"Yes darling, I have it right here... I think the first one should be-"
>Anon pulls and sorts the myriad outfits on the rack according to your roster.
>Something that changed six or so times before you finally managed to reach the end of it.
>Now that that's finished...
>You take a deep breath.
>Anon turns to face you, "Ready?"
>Still holding that breath, you nod.
>Anon unzips the outfit bag and expertly removes it to hold it out for you.
>You take the outfit in your magic and begin inspecting it as Anon goes for the next bag.
>Your keen eyes scan over every inch of fabric, through every layer, and now satisfied with its condition you return it to the rack in the first position.
>Anon holds out the second outfit in the order for you and you again take it in your magical grasp.
>The process repeats and continues for the next two outfits in the line until...
>"Shit! Oh I fucked it..." Anon groans.
>You jump from his outburst so quickly that you almost drop the outfit in your magic.
>You place it on the rack, turned the other way so you can return to it, and trot over to Anon.
>He has a worried look on his face.
>In his hand is the next outfit on the roster, with the bag's zipper caught into a tear in the fabric.
>"Rarity... It was an accident I swear! I forgot which one had the floaty cloth an-"
>You magic the outfit, bag and all, out of his arms and hold it up closer.
>You let out a hiss.
>The damage is quite severe.
>You turn to look at Anon, his face is so remorseful that it could shatter your heart right here and now if you don't get rid of it
"Oh Darling don't worry, it's not... SO bad..." you squeak out.
>He lets out a sigh, "Damn it" he mutters to himself, "You were right. I shouldn't have been so lax about this. If I were a little more-"
"Anonymous don't." you command, giving him pause, "I was the wrong one. Letting my nerves dictate my every command flies in the face of everything we've worked for. This is about the love of fashion, about putting on our best face and giving it our all."
>Goodness, you've clearly gone so far beyond the point of crippling anxiety that it's wrapped back around to confidence
>"Y-yeah, love of fashion..." he repeats to himself.
>You turn his face to yours with a gentle tug of magic, "And your face is best when it's not wracked with worry darling."
>His face softens and you return your attention to his outfit.
"Just leave this to me, I'll have this fixed up in no time" you state confidently, "why don't you go and watch a performance or two? You can give us an idea of the competition and make any adjustments as needed. I'll have this fixed up by then."
>You magic over your repair kit, specific to this outfit, and don your glasses.
>As you thread your needle you notice that Anon is still here.
>You turn to him, his eyes are focused on you completely and a bit of color in his cheeks from what must surely be frustration, which for you is a step better than the somber look he had moments before.
>You wave a hoof at him.
"Go, go. You have no need to worry Anonymous. I am the best after all, you claimed as much yourself didn't you?"
>His eyebrows raise and a smile returns to his face, "Y-yeah... you are the best. I'll uh, be back soon then."
>The moment he closes the door you let out a deep sigh, your sudden burst of confidence gave out at just the right time.
>Ha! At designing maybe, when the twelve or so designers who have requested private meeting with Anon have perished
>Beyond that, with your pudgy barrel and coltish attitude...
>You brush the negative thoughts away, fixing this outfit is going to drain you as is, no need to make things worse by being so down.
>Just as you are tying the knot that should hold your emergency stitch in place, Anon returns.
"Hello Anonymous, look!" You proclaim, holding it up to him, "It's like it never happened"
>His face takes a moment to register it but in moments lights up with joy, "Oh- uh, wow! That's great!"
>He reaches out for the outfit but quickly retracts his hands, "Uh, why don't I just hold off until the performance" he explains with a chuckle.
>With a decent amount of time lost on the repair, you and Anonymous have to double down your efforts in order to finish the set up in a manageable time.
>The final outfit is checked and approved by your intense scrutiny.
>Thankfully, according to Anon, the order of outfits you had set originally should still be viable so that helps you both only fall slightly behind schedule.
>"So, the swaps now?"
>You scrunch your muzzle.
>They don't really fit the theme of this showcase.
>As they are, they're functional and wonderfully so, you and Anon worked together to design these outfits after all.
>They look marvelous on him, but poor Caramel, he simply hated having his photos taken in them and there was nothing you nor Photo Finish could do to improve them.
>So you don't blame him, they simply do not transfer over well from human/biped to pony.
>So they are truly a final resort.
"I'm afraid we simply don't have the time Anonymous. I'll have to give them a quick glance over before we go u-"
"The stagemares! We need to give them our audio and visuals!"
>Oh, this is going wrong at nearly every turn!
>Your head whips around the room as you search around for the envelope with everything you need.
>"Oh, hey, I've got it right here" Anon exclaims, holding up the envelope.
>You look from him, to the envelope, to his swap outfits and back again.
>Before you can even say it Anon speaks, "So you're going to look over the swaps. I'll give the stagemares the stuff?"
>You clamp your mouth shut and nod.
>You internally thank Celestia for such a capable model, if it weren't for him you...
>You shudder, the mere thought of what you might be like right now-
>"You got it Rara" he chirps.
>He's heading out the door before you can even start to scrunch your muzzle.
"And make sure you run it through with them! Don't let them shoo you out and insist that it'll be fine! You sit there with them and RUN IT!" you shout after him.
>Relax Rarity, stress marks appear on both stallions and mares.
>A slightly calming sigh escapes your lips as you turn to face the garments.
>You can't help but crack a smile as you begin to glance over them all.
>They weren't meant to be taken along to Prance, as they were more personal projects as opposed to professional.
>You weren't able to make any more appropriate biped/quadruped outfits so they came along in the end...
>All things considered, you're taking the mounting failures with great stride.
>That or you've blown a mental fuse...
>You are cautiously wheeling out the rack with all of Anon's outfits down the busy hallway.
>There's been no sign of him anywhere, you asked the stagemares if they've seen him and got shrugs and head shakes in response.
>Where in Equestria is that stallion? He looms well over everypony else, surely he can't be that hard to spo-
"Oh goodness! I am so terribly sorry. Are you o-"
>You apology dies in your throat as a pink coated purple maned bitch comes into view around the rack.
>"You should be careful Rarity..." she says while inspecting the clothing on your rack, "You don't want to be crashing all over the place now do you?"
>A small growl rumbles in your throat.
"Of course, Suri... speaking from experience are you?"
>Her smug smile lowers into a firm line.
>She blows air out of her nostrils.
>"Clever... tell me, did you expend all of your brain power on that one quip? Because I'm not seeing where any thought went into these rags."
>Stars and moon above do you hate this bitch, she's such an insufferable dyke.
"Oh dear me Suri, I didn't realize you had been afflicted so severely. Tell me When are you having the operation? I'll send you some flowers."
>She furrows her brows, "You- uh, o-operation?"
"Of course darling, to fix your eyesight. How courageous you are, competing while so incredibly blind" you goad.
>Her jaw drops, something she quickly rectifies by snapping her mouth into a fierce sneer.
>She huffs and raises her nose at you, "Well, this has been, fun-" she hisses, "but I do believe I've spent just the right amount of time with the pity entrant. I have bigger ponies to... associate myself with" she growls.
>You watch her as she trots further down the hallway, feeling quite pleased with yourself.
>She pounds on a nearby storage closet, "Come on "assistant", I need you for a few more "errands"."
>And now feeling very curious...
>A stallion quickly emerges from the closet, he's young, probably just barely a stallion who looks to be bordering on the line between lithe and gaunt.
>"Y-yes Miss Polomare?"
>She turns her nose at the young boy, "This way" she commands, walking down the hallway.
>The stallion is quick to fall in behind her, "If you wish your dream to model my clothing to become reality then I suggest being more to the point than you have been. Am I understood?" she says with hostility in her voice.
>"Y-yes ma'am" the young stallion mumbles in response.
>They both disappear around the corner at the end of the hallway.
>The poor dear, how she manages to retain anypony working for her is beyond you.
>Coco had said that she maintains a professional and friendly facade early on in the relationship, but you got no hint of either just now.
>Perhaps it's different for any males she empl-
>The storage door opens of its own accord, causing you to react in a very marely and defensive way.
>The noise that escaped your throat was that of a warning cry, you are a civilized gentlemare after all and would never do something as uncouth as a sucker punch .
>A mare begins walking out into the hallway.
>Your keen eyes target a few things immediately.
>The bite crimps at the end of her mane.
>Matting right at the base of her tail.
>And- WHEW... the smell of sex coming from that room.
>You quickly resume pushing your rack in the direction of the stage, hoping that the mare didn't notice you watching and assumed you were just passing through.
>You place you rack right where the stagemare tell you to, and just in time too.
>ANon is supposed to be going up after the next performan-
>You had gotten so wound up with Suri tha-
>Oh... that right CUNT!
>Is there no contest she enters where she can just let her work speak for itself?!
>You heart begins racing with pre-preshow jitters.
>Nope wait, this is a full on panic attack.
>"Alright, Silky Smooth, step up to the "x" on the floor. When I tell you to, give it your all okay?" the stagemare asks the stallion nearby.
>He looks to his designer, she rests a hoof on hiw wither, he turns back to the stagemare and nods.
>The stagemare then looks to he clipboard, "And you, uh, Rarity right? Anonymous is going up next. You can bring him over now if you want."
>You intend let a small titter escape your lips but a loud guffaw finds its way out instead.
>You quickly clamp a hoof over your mouth and nod instead as you excuse yourself.
>As you are turning to begin running at full speed to find you partner you find Anonymous walking over.
"Don't you "Hey" me Anonymous! I have been looking everywhere for you! I-"
>He holds up his hands, "I'm sorry. I got... wrapped up with something, no worries though I took care of everything."
"It wasn't Suri was it?"
>He tilts his head, "SHE's here?! Who's lives did she threaten to get a spot here?"
>You make a light squeak, if you weren't such a mix of emotions right now, you'd be laughing at that.
>Anon strides over to you and you help him slip on the rest of his first outfit.
>The both of you do a few final arrow drills of his performance with what little time you have left.
>He nails everything down perfectly.
>Anon kneels down and takes your hooves in his hands.
>You look into his eyes and quickly break away because of the shiver threatening to run up your spine.
>"I have a really good feeling about this Rarity."
"I'm glad at least one of us feels that way" you admit.
>Anon gives an airy chuckle, his smile makes your heart skip a beat, bringing your total to about five million since you've both started working together.
>"Just... watch me from here. I hope you'll change your mind."
>The stagemare interrupts you both to inform Anon that he needs to step up.
>He breaks away from you and gets into position.
>You hear a quick trotting of hooves from behind.
>Both you and Anon turn to see a sweaty, albeit cheerfully so, stallion trotting over.
>He waves at you both, and Anon sends an excited wave back at him.
>The stagemare informs him that he's on and with one passing look Anon is walking.
>The stallion walks up next to you and introduces himself, "Hi, my name's Shiny Buttons."
"Rarity, a pleasure."
>The curtain is still drawn with Anon on the center of the stage as the announcer begins introducing you.
>"Oh no, the pleasure is all mine I assure you."
>You quirk an eyebrow, the stallion is quick to respond to your confusion.
"I was the one on stage before Silky."
>Oh, yes, now that he's said it you do recall seeing him before.
>"My designer was nowhere to be found and I had just moments before needing to go on stage."
>The announcer has finished with your line and is now continuing with Anon.
>"I was... well, it certainly wasn't pretty a sight I'll tell you that much... And then out of nowhere Anonymous shows up and offers to help me get prepared."
>Is that where he disappeared off to?
>"I must say, and I did to him, I don't know that I would've offered my time to help the competition with my own performance looming so closely... but Anon told me that he learned from the best."
>A blush forms on your face.
>"So, I suppose I have you both to thank for saving my flank when my designer completely abandoned me."
>The announcer is now finally at the description for you fall line.
>"I simply had to insist on doing something in return-"
>This is it, this is everything you both have worked so hard for.
>"At first Anonymous resisted, but then he caved and gave me a very important task."
>While you don't mind having a handsome stallion praising your professional ethics, you'd really prefer he stop now.
>Shiny rests a hoof on your wither, a chipper squeak escapes his lips, you shoot him a smile and turn back to watch the curtain begin to rise.
>Okay, and now the music should kick in with blaring horn-
>What in Equestri-
>The hoof on your shoulder begins to dig deeply.
>You turn and, judging by Shiny's wince, glare at the stallion.
>"This is all planned!" he blurts out.
>"Just watch!" Shiny then starts to turn your head towards the stage, "Anon wants you to just stay here and watch."
>"WHen your legs don't work like they used to before~"
>Anon is slowly rocking in place as the stallion's voice continues singing.
>He slowly starts to unbutton his outfit, this was absolutely NOT in the choreography.
>He disrobes until he's down to-
>The swap clothing?! When in Equestria did he-
>Oh the cheeky cock, the both of them. He changed while Shiny had your attention!
>His head turns in your direction, eyes locking directly on to yours.
>"People fall in love in mysterious ways~"
>Your breath hitches.
>He holds out his hand towards you.
>"Maybe just the touch of a hand~"
>"Oh me I fall in love with you every single day~"
>He curls his arm and brings his other one up, like a stallion would his beloved.
>"So honey nowww, take me into your loving arms~"
>He begins sliding his feet around on the stage, like he were dancing with somepony.
>"Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars~"
>Your eyes begin to water.
>He can't be serious...
>All those other prospects...
>Beside you Shiny is sniffling loudly, "Th-there is no w-way I will ever feel bad for "sabotaging" you."
>Anon waltzes his way up and down the runway, dipping behind the curtains just long enough to swap into the next "swaps" attire.
>He returns to the stage on tempo and begins walking with his hands outstretched.
>Projected up on the walls is a photo of you, Anon, and Sweetie walking around Ponyville just before your trip.
>He's wearing the very outfit he's modeling right now.
>A muffles squeal comes from your right, "Is that your daughter? Oh she is simply adorable! You all are such a wonderful budding herd."
>You are too enthralled to be able to correct him.
>Anon again returns and switches into the next attire in his roster.
>The late night one he fought you so hard on making "comfier."
>"-And the crowds don't remember my name~"
>Projected now is a candid shot of you and Anon drunkenly celebrating getting the cover photo in Allure.
>Did he really look at you like that?
>Anon returns and quickly changes again.
>He paces about midway through the runway before kneeling, the projection changes and now it's a photograph of him donning his current attire and you with your turtleneck and beret.
>This was when you were having your last dinner in Ponyville before taking the flight to Prance and you Beret came off your head from the wind.
>He cycles through the rest of the clothing on his roster, each one accompanied by a projection of you and him in some matching fashion.
>"Maybe we found love right where we are~"
>And maybe we found love right where we are~"
>At last he's found himself content to simply stand and smile at you, his eyes shimmering under the stage lights.
>"And we found love right where we are~"
>You place the suitcases full of clothing in the back of the limousine carriage.
>A smile spreads widely across your face as you look up to your partner.
>His face is just as bright as yours, "Ready baby?"
>You turn around and face the wonderfully elaborate building.
>A curious look adorns your face as you squint to get a clearer view of what's going on.
>You can see Shiny Buttons with Suri's "assistant".
>The judges are all nearby along with Suri herself and the mare you saw leaving the supply closet.
>The assistant points to both Suri and the other mare, he then buries his face into Shiny's shoulder who seems to be comforting him.
>Your ears flick as you just barely make out Suri's voice, she must be quite loud for it to have carried this far.
>A light shines in your eyes a few times and you barely manage to see Suri reach her hooves out towards the source of the light before falling to floor.
>You piece together what must've just happened.
>If your smile got any larger you'd risk breaking your jaw.
>You turn back to face Anonymous.
"Of course... love." you coo.
>The carriage driver opens the door for you both.
>Anon enters and you follow in after him.
>Back towards home, together.
I've been working on this since yesterday, I'd love to hear thoughts on it if possible. I'm not totally happy with how it came out. Thanks.
Overall, it's pretty well written, but the few RGRE clues there are are a bit to unnoticeable to really make it feel like it belongs here.
While you could take the models being male as a major clue, you do have to remember that male clothes are modeled too, lessening it's impact of being RGRE.
Still an enjoyable read.
>Anon enters a committed relationship with Zecora
>Everypony thinks he has jungle fever and they won't last
>A month later, ponies are getting worried
>Maybe Zecora used her strange foreign powers to seduce or threaten the poor stallion into staying with her
>Clearly, something must be done
>Something involving torches and pitchforks
>her strange foreign powers
Wouldn't Anon be stranger and more foreign?
>Fat!Anon in RGRE
>Fat!Anon knows he's unattractive; cannot imagine mares wanting him
>Conversations go pretty much the way most convos do with Oblivious!Anon, but now it's justified
>Mares see him as having a fluffy coat
>They cum buckets
If you assume their world is one of antiquity, and not the modern one it suddenly converts to when it's show convenient, you could go the route of "fat = successful" that people went with for most of history.
It's not quite that. For most of history, most people were, if not starving, could very easily end up that way if a year went shit.
So if you were able to have a bit of girth, you absolutely must have been well off.
And further back between hunter-gatherer societies and famines, a partner with a bit of chub meant they knew how to not let their kids starve.
That said, if someone was obscenely fat, the ye olde days would still see a disgusting lard ass as a disgusting lard ass.
Don't we have enough passive Anons?
Anon gets whacked on the head and suffers from a minor case of drain bamage.
When he wakes up in a bed he doesn't recognize, he freaks... and is shocked when Celestia, Luna, or Cadence (though the latter would be best; not enough Love Butt stories) canters in to reassure him, asking 'what's wrong, honey?'
Turns out he's lost his memory of the last year and a half: in the time between, he had a whirlwind romance and got hitched with Cadence, settled down, etcetera.
Now he remembers none of it, nor the feelings behind it all.
>Zecora walks into town one day for her monthly trip.
>Ponies notice she has a limp.
>She must be savagely beating that poor colt, they must save him.
>Secretly she had anal the night before.
isn't glimmer part of shining's herd?
I thought it was: glimmer, luna, and cadance with shining,
twilight, celery, sunspot, twixie and moonpants with anon
and nigga the great and delectable twixie is FAR from worst pony, especially if she's actually consented to share a relationship with fucking twilight of all ponies
luna's dope, but it'd be weird for the sisters to be in the same herd
I mean not that that stops anybody else from writing them as casual bang buddies, but it's still weird in principle
actually it would be pretty weird for celestia to be in a herd with twlight to be honest. like, the whole former teacher and student thing is kinda sketchy.
OH, but I think I see where there would be a problem putting cadance and celly together since there's also a sorta familial thing between them as well, even if it's not (necessarily) by blood. but you could still throw luna and cadance together because cadance didn't grow up with luna as her aunt or whatever so there's less weirdness there.
basically if you want to avoid incest* these pairings are inevitable.
I dunno but the idea of best princess with candybutt and shitty armor in the same herd just makes me meh so hard
I still couldn't tell beyond that who was in who's herd
overall a really disappointing bit of green
wake me up when better green that's not related to it is posted
Honestly Luna x Celestia is one of the few relationships that are fanon I could see being real, after all;
They pretty much get to see everyone else die and would be the only constant in eachothers lives.
honestly I was left feeling confused, disappointed, and not too keen on reading more of that green
I wonder what LaP was thinking when we wrote it, cause it was all just a confusing clusterfuck and really shitty herds and wtf
especially if you go the whole celestia is getting her sister who she cares about deeply into a herd with her so she can get her used to modern times route
the herds just made zero sense, were boring and confusing, the characterization was pisspoor, and overall the story was ignorable and weak
Pretty much the opposite of what LaP has done before
So much so I wonder if that was even the real LaP
And if it was written by LaP, sorry m8 but I just really disliked the story
it's not really shitposting since most of the discussion is very much discussing why people dislike it
Which in all honesty can hopefully help our writefags with their green
Now if anons were purely hating on the story and giving no reasons why they hated it, then it would be shitposting
But they aren't, and they are giving reasons, I'd say it's perfectly reasonable to discuss why they feel that way.
Furthermore, constructive arguments and discussions like these help shape the general and give a real sense to what anons like in their green, and can help future writefags.
Simply calling those who are dissenting voices shitposters only promotes an echo chamber like atmosphere.
Granted some dissenting voices are shitposters, but a good majority aren't.
As someone who hasn't finished season 3 yet,I like to entertain the idea that they're not necessarily biological sisters. If you go with the notion that Alicorns are made, not born, Celectia and Luna may have just been good friends before whatever event happened that caused their ascension. They may have been complete strangers even, until working together for the good of whatever it was. If that were the case, the whole calling eachother 'sister' is probably a bond of sorts taken from the fact that they share the same fate.
And on an unrelated note, I'm enjoying LaP's new story as well as another round of Twilight not being a cunt. So fuck you. If your complaining make him disheartened and uninterested in continuing, I will stab you with a pillow.
Nice story, and pretty well written. A bit strange that p0neworld has modern real world music, but I'm willing to ignore it because it doesn't matter too much.
But like Shukaku, I don't really see how this fits into RGRE. There are sort of snips of it - the young male model, Anon maybe being ignored by the techies for being a stallion, but they seemed almost hung on this to make it fit, rather than built in, if you get me?
>Anon live a bleak world called
Humania,where he has lived a life of mediocrity
>decides to finally make a name and legacy for himself
>soon after is inadvertently teleported to tiny horse world
>tiny and sexist horse world
>his work and achievements mean nothing in this tiny horse world
>his laments are labeled "stallion troubles" and "stalionist spiel"
How does Anon cope with these shenanigans?
I liked the story.
You have a clear and correct style of writing.
I'd love to see more of your stories.
Though, I'm confused about what happened with Suri at the end.
Did the ponice showed and tased her ass, or something?
NORDANON SMASH LAZY WRITEFAG!
A subte is fine too, Anon.
Write more things.
Luna seems preddy cool.
Timberwolf waifu, never 4get.
We love you shukaku, which is why you will never live it down
Auntie Celestia is the cool aunt.
Luna tries but fails awkwardly, so you hang out with her out of pity.
A tiny horse wants is flirting with you, but there's someone wrong on the internet that needs to be set straight.
What do you do?
>Anon reaches out to stroke you mane, you react quickly grabbing his hoof appendages in your mouth
>He gives a smile "You're so adorable sometimes."
>That must be the que to claim him as your own as they did millenia ago
>Your teeth begin to tear into his flesh
>Anon starts pulling away, poor colt probably is nervous about being joined body and soul
>But you've come too far to stop now
>While your teeth are dull and not made to tear into flesh, the power of your jaw forces them through anyway as you start to taste blood
>"LUNA WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"
>You barely hear him now as you break off the chunk of flesh and devour it heartily
>Mares are gathered with looks of horror, probably with how you just made this fine stud eternally yours
>Anon is still screaming, blood pouring from his hand and pooling into the floor
"Do not worry my love, now nobody can steal you from me."
>Anon looks at you confusion on his face
>It doesn't last long however as guard ponies tackle you down
>In a flash of light Celestia appears with a concerned look on her face
>She gallops over to you as fast as her hooves can take her
>"Sister we do NOT do that anymore!"
"B-But what about being joined together in union for eternity, how do you do that without joining blood?"
>"We have a ceremony called marriage now, where two people vow to stay together."
>Marriage? That's what anon kept asking you about, you thought it was some colty drink or something
>The laws are quite clear, you got a whole week sentencing to pony prison
>Even worse was that Anon may never speak to you again
>Sometimes it's hard being a princess
The internet fight goes on without me. Hot mares won't.
Maybe it's my poor English but what happened to Suri?
How much of the following do people want to see before I get to MoonAss coming into the picture?
1. Anon's struggles as a single dad.
2. Venus's development as raised by Anon.
3. Celestia being the cool Aunt.
4. Anon interacting with his boss and their kid(soon to be kids)
3. Yes, while also showing (thoughts or otherwise) her disappointment in Cadence.
4. Eh, maybe as some side-bits to scenes. Not even sure it'd be good as a full sub-plot.
1. I'd like to see some reference to it, but not too much. I'd like to skip straight to the meat of things.
2. As much as you like, just so long as she doesn't turn out to be a hoodlum.
3. I think it'd be cool, I think most of us have had a family member like that, who took us cool places or spoiled us rotten. Even more so if it's a secret to Cadence…
4. Who's the boss?
Some of this, but not enough to make you lag on it.
This could be shown in small snippets or references.
Awe yiss, Do Want, [Meme] [Meme/}, ect This is something we don't get enough of
>3. Yes, while also showing (thoughts or otherwise) her disappointment in Cadence.
Same as 2.
1. Yes, but as others said, not too much. We want to know he struggles, but most of the story is about him and his kid, and further interactions with other groups.
2. This is one main part of the story. Since it's supposed to be a story of a single dad raising his kid (eventually with Moonbutt, which I'm not all too happy with, but that's just me), this is a must.
3. Yes. Maybe not as big as two, but Auntie Tia is part of the 'family,' so seeing her interact with Venus would be nice.
4. Maybe. As others said once again, maybe bits and pieces. I feel the premise focuses on Anon's family, not others. Showing family differences would be nice, with the other family suggesting he find a nice mare to settle down with?
1. Yes, this should be the biggest part, since it's the whole idea behind it
2. Secondary, seeing the kid's perspective is a big part too
3.Eh. This should probably be minor, not only because of how they're trying to keep it on the down-low, but also to avoid overuse of a gag
4.Not sure about this one, but would put it between Celly's appearances and Venus' perspective.
>1. Anon's struggles as a single dad.
I hope he'll be forced to do dirty work.
>1. Anon's struggles as a single dad.
Some, but not much. I feel that the amount of green before cadence comes back should be kept short
>2. Venus's development as raised by Anon.
A good bit. She's going to have unique struggles being an alicorn raised by a human, and a male one at that. I'd love to see how anon handles her growing up
>3. Celestia being the cool Aunt.
Yes, especially anon will need her help raising Venus from time to time since she's the alicorn closest to anon and will be the only one available to help venus through magical alicorn changes
>4. Anon interacting with his boss and their kid(soon to be kids)
not sure about this without more info
>1. Anon's struggles as a single dad.
>2. Venus's development as raised by Anon.
>3. Celestia being the cool Aunt.
>4. Anon interacting with his boss and their kid(soon to be kids)
Meh. I'm fairly ambivalent about that.
1. As the other anons said, this is what the story should really revolve around.
2. A bit of this would be really nice. Showing how her character developed would make later Cadance/Venus interactions more involved and personal
3. I see this as mostly a way to add comic relief and perhaps the plot point that gets Moon Horse involved. Maybe she follows Celestia one day to an outing and BOOM, there's an attractive non-beta male creature that's good with kids.
4. Should be touched on, yes, but not much more than background info.
>It finally hits
>All this time you've been in some crazy backwards horse land, no wonder all those mares wanted you
>Moondancer walks up clearly slightly annoyed "Anon, can't you just have plain cider?"
"Moondancer, I'm going to give you one chance here, tell them I can have a hard cider."
>You cut her off with the most serious stare you can muster in this moment of trying to rationalize your situation
>You can see the internal conflict in her eyes as she turns to the barmaid
>"P-Please get Anon his drink."
>The barmaid shrugs "If he vomits over the floor, it's your problem."
>You smile at Moondancer, it's good to know someone you can trust when faced the the reality that you're seen as some exotic walking cock
>Moondancer looks weary as you gulp down the drink
>"Be careful Anon, that's a whole 1% alcohol!"
>She's genuinely concerned, at first you thought the 0.5 thing was a huge restriction
>Turns out ponies just can't handle their liquor
>A quick purple flash breaks through the door panting loudly
>"ANON! I'm here to save you."
>Looks like Sparkle noticed you weren't home
>She looks up from her exercise induced daze and spots you, drinking hard cider next to a nervous Moondancer
>Oh fuck no
>Moondancer doesn't match your quick train of thought and is knocked back into a magical restraint by Twilight
>"I can't believe you'd do this! Trying to get Anon drunk, that's low."
>These goddamn ponies jump to conclusions far too much, you're sick of it
>You walk up and grab Sparkle by the scruff of her neck before she does something she regrets
"Moondancer hasn't done anything. I asked for the drink, she advised against it but I didn't listen."
>Twilight squirms in your grasp and the magic restraints on Moondancer vanish
"Are you two little ponies going to make up, or do you honestly believe Moony would take advantage of anyone?"
>You put her down but the glare doesn't fade, except now it's directed towards you
>"Well then, maybe you're the one I should direct my attention at Anonymous. Leaving the house, coming to a bar. Are you out of your mind?"
"Twilight, ponies are half my size. What're they going to do, aggressively cuddle my leg?"
>"So you knew the dangers and still disobeyed my orders to stay inside!"
"No that's not, what?"
>It's now you see Moondancer finally get back up to her feet, face turned to a similar look of anger
>Moondancer directs her glare towards Twilight "You can't keep him locked up, just because you're a princess now it doesn't mean you can order colts around."
>Sparkle steps back at the sudden verbal bashing by her friend, only managing to splutter out horse noises
>This is getting intense, it'd be a mistake to let it go on
>That's it, you can't allow yourself to have been in a magical land for less than a few days and already destroyed a friendship
>You grab Twilight and Moondancer, wrapping your arms around them and lifting them to your side
>Twilight instantly starts struggling as you exit the bar and start walking back to the house
>"Hey put me down, you can't carry a princess around like this!"
>Moondancer is deathly silent however and you can feel her breathing heavily
>You get a few odd stares and the princess quiets down while trying to cover her face as you walk through the streets
>It doesn't take long to get back to the royal housing without much trouble, both of them too embarrassed to shout or draw attention to their predicament
>You step through the still unhinged door and walk into the bedroom putting both of them on the bed as they glare at one another
>Maybe the best course of action would be to let them sort this out on their own
>But this entire ordeal has been tiring and you'd rather sleep than listen to these little horses argue
"Come on girls, time to sleep."
>They both look at you incredulously
>Twilight clears her throat "Anonymous I don't feel comfortable leaving you alone here with her." the last word dripping with poison
>Moondancer retorts "Don't worry, I won't leave and let her control you!"
>Looks like they don't plan on coming to an agreement
"Fine, then you'll both have to just sleep here."
>They look around confused
>"This is a one bedroom apartment-"
>You cut Twilight off by stuffing them both underneath the blanket
>They start to protest but as you take off your shirt they both fall silent
>You get in the middle of them so they don't start fighting again
>They both look as if they have a mouthful while trying to stay as still as possible
>You can feel the tension in the air, so you do the only thing you can to calm little ponies down
>A hand drifts to both their manes as you begin rubbing the back of their heads
>It elicits a yelp from the duo when you first start but after a short while you found they both drifted off to sleep
>They unknowingly nuzzle into you and wrap their hooves protectively around you while snoring
>It still amazes you how these ponies keep finding ways to be adorable
I hope this doesn't feel too forced. I just didn't want a thread to go by without at least a small update since I've been procrastinating.
Tell me Moondancer at least took her shirt off.
>"I will not let this insult pass, get your hoof OFF MY COLT'S ASS!"
>No zebra waifu to share the forest with.
>No zebra waifu who understands what it's like to be alone.
>She'll never don the traditional warpaint of her people when she goes to defend your honor.
>Cadence tries to cook romantic meals for Shining and Anon, to woo the latter.
>Shining tries to be a bro to get Anon away from his wife's abominations.
>Anon thinks Shining just doesn't want someone else porking his wife.
>Celestia, who has her eye on Anon, watches from the bushes. "Soon.jpg".
Depends on the various venues they try.
...You know, Celly trying to hide behind a pot plant, and the Guards just ignoring her/pretending because of who she is, would be hilarious.
I found it funny, because of the situation not because of animal cruelty. This thing already happend and there is nothing we can do about it; rats are disgusting creature that spread diseases, and I'm not the type of person to go out looking for animals to harm. So, cool your shit peta, because you're not gonna change a thing by complaining about it.
These are fucking adorable. Keep them coming, Anon.
"Z-Zecora, you really need to calm down. Diamond Tiara's mother could-"
>"I don't care what demon spawned her; I will defend my colt's honour!"
"Cory, I'm fine. I don't want you to get into trouble because of me."
>"You think you aren't worth trouble one day? Who hurt you to make you think this way?"
Is a single animal abuse gif all it takes to set the thread off? There's so much better stuff you could be doing other than fighting.
Considering the lack of empathy towards animal abuse I'd say you're a goddammed sociopath
I think most people on this board would react in a negative manner as well to a fucking animal abuse gif
I'm glad alot of people are in fact reacting negatively cause it shows they aren't fucking sociopaths
I don't know. A lot of the stuff we're seeing here right now (my own green included) is just "Anon is doing normal human things, and tiny lady-horses worry over him and also crack sexist remarks". Ponies avoiding baths is adorable.
>"What? Let you outside where you could get hurt?! Oh, no no NO, Anon!"
>Cadence picks you up with her magic and pulls you into her lap.
>"Besides, there are so many awful mares out there who'll try and trick you. Can you imagine it?"
>She hugs you tight against her smelly, unwashed hoodie. You can feel the fabric of her striped socks rubbing against your shirt.
>"Maybe they'll have a colt pretend to be assaulted so that they can lure you into a dark ally. Or maybe they'll... they'll ask if you can give them directions, and then pull you into their chariot."
>The head-nuzzle you receive was probably supposed to be comforting, but the heavy breathing right in your ear made it very unnerving instead.
>"Y-you'll be safe, okay? Right here, Anon. You stay r-right here with Candy."
He just needs to try harder.
>You push open the door with your rump, hearing the all too familiar ring of your shop bell
>"Coming" Sassy's voice calls from the back of the shop
>You hear a gasp from behind you, "Well bust my buttons Rarity! I-"
"Greeting later... help now please" you grunt
>You can feel the weight of the suitcases lighten as Sassy's magic is combined with your own
>Together you both manage to gently drop the luggage in the work room
>You let out a loud sigh, Sassy magics over a hoofkerchief to you which you immediately use to dab your damping forehead
>"You know I said over and over that I could help you carry that" Anon remarks, leaning against the door frame with a smug smile on his face
>You quickly take in a breath and hold it to keep your panting hidden
"Nonsense darling, it was barely an effort on my part" you respond confidently
>He hums questioningly
>You can feel your chest burning up with the desire to have fresh air
>Look away look away lookawaylookaway!
>"Anonymous!" Sassy chirps, trotting around your coltfriend, causing him to turn to face her, "Why don't you tell me about the show?"
>You exhale and start catching your breath while Anon is turned away
>"We both know Rarity prefers to do the unpacking herself anyway"
>Anon chuckles, "Yeah, I remember "Hat's off to Manehattan" never gonna get involved with that again..."
>A embarrassed blush forms on your face
>You gave them clear instructions on how you wanted to do it, it's not your fault they were doing it wrong
>" Come out when you're done babe" Anon coos, combing his hand through your mane, with the curls, before entering the showroom with Sassy
>"Babe?" Sassy mouths as she steps to the side so Anon can pass her and enter the showroom
>You give her a coy smile
>She magics out a ethereal hoof and you return with one in kind, after a quick bump they dissipate and Sassy follows out behind Anonymous
>"Tea?" Sassy asks
>"Oh yeah, I'll go make some" Anon answers, heading into the small kitchen in the back.
>She and Anon catch up as you carefully remove and inspect the clothing one more time before putting them away with their stallion counterparts.
>The ones Anonymous used, the ones you both designed together, you box them all up and slip them into your saddle bags.
>You set the stallion versions apart from all the others, you don't quite know what to do with them for now, but you know that you want to keep this line limited to one piece each.
>You let out a satisfied breath as you admire your hoofiwork for a moment.
>Both Sassy and Anon turn to look at you as you enter the showroom.
>"Swarming swathes Rarity, I'm so sorry to hear you lost."
"Oh it's alright Sassy, because of Anonymous' performance" you glance over to Anonymous who winks back at you, "I was asked to speak with some of the writers for Tauren magazines and may have even gotten a distributor for some future works in Minotauria."
>Sassy's eyes light up at this, "Moving forward even during a stumble, I would expect no less from you Rarity."
>You smile and take your seat next to Anon, he pours you a cup of tea and slides it over to you.
>"Still though, for Suri Polomare of all ponies who attended to win... oooh, that just dulls my needles."
>Both Anon and Sassy look at you.
>You shoot Anon a questioning look.
>While sipping his tea he sends you a concerned look in return.
>"What's the look for? You were there, we saw them give her and her model the medals for winning."
>Your eyes widen.
"Dear, didn't I tell you?"
>"Tell me what?"
>"On the plane darling, surely I told you."
>Anon chuckles, "we didn't do much talking on the plane Rara..."
>Your muzzle scrunches, from both his statement and the name, of course you tal-
>Oh no, that's right...
>There was a lot of lips moving, but little talking.
>You clear your throat as a means to force the blush on your face away.
"R-right. I was mistaken... anywho, I suppose I'll get to tell you both then."
>Anon and Sassy set their teacups down on their saucers and lean in.
"Anon, do you recall the last thing we did before leaving for the airport?"
>"Do you mean in our set up room or-"
"NO! Uh, no, I mean just before we entered the limousine."
"You asked me if I was ready to go-"
>"Oh, yeah that's right. Then you spaced out for a minute. I just thought you were "being inspired" by the architecture or something."
"Well it was quite the breathtaking venue, but no. I was watching the events unfolding out by the entrance."
>"Events? I remember a bunch of ponies grouped outside, I just figured they were saying goodbye or something."
"Oh there was surely some goodbyes being said, specifically between Suri and her medal."
>Anon's eyebrows raise at this.
"Shiny Buttons's designer-"
>"The one who ditched?"
"It would seem she didn't abandon her model after all but instead must have found herself in a spot of bother and Suri, being the generous mare she is, sent in her handsome young assistant to well... assist."
>They nod along as you explain.
"The spot in this instance happened to be a storage closet."
>You watch as they make the connection you know it's happened when their lips form "O"s.
>"My god, can she ever just enter her work and play clean?" Anon huffs.
>Your follow up catches in your throat and you chuckle to yourself instead.
>You're noticing little similarities all the time now.
"From what I could see from where we were, It would seem that Shiny confronted his manager and eventually Suri's assistant, and then ultimately the judges."
>"Sequins and sashes!" Sassy exclaims.
"Oh yes. Though thankfully it didn't seem like Shiny was upset with the young stallion, the opposite in fact, it seemed like he was consoling the poor boy as he admitted to the judges what he'd done."
>Anon nods, "He's a pretty good guy, had my back when I needed him too."
>Anonymous plops himself down in the empty spot next to you, close enough that your arms are touching.
"The last thing I could see was the judges taking away Suri's medal, and presumably, going to find her model as well."
>Both of them hiss.
>"Well, it's not like she didn't get what was coming to her" Anon remarks.
>Both you and Sassy nod in agreement.
>"So... you two...?" Sassy asks, knowing full well the answer already going by her smug look.
>You lean into your special somepony and tilt your head back.
>Anon looks down and meets your gaze.
>The both of you smile at the same time.
"Uh Sweetie Belle."
>You're starting to get dizzy trying to keep track of the little filly as she races around the room.
>"YES YES YES YES!"
>She throws her hooves out in front of her to brake, but was moving too quickly to do so smoothly.
>The end result sends her tumbling towards you both.
>Anon kneels down and catches her before she manages to bowl you both over.
>"Ow..." she whispers before looking up at you, "Uh, yes?"
"Goodness Sweetie, I didn't think you'd find this news all that exciting."
>"Are you kidding me Rarity?! I have a big brother!" she shouts, leaping up and throwing her arms around Anon's neck.
>The look of shock on his face must surely be minuscule to the embarrassment on yours.
"Sweetie! Y-you can't just jump to THAT, we've only just started-"
>A warmth comes to rest on your head, you follow Anon's arm all the way up to his face, plastered with a tender smile, "It's okay, I don't think I mind it."
>Sweetie pushes back from him, luckily he'd already brought an arm under her so she didn't just throws herself back onto the floor, "Hay yeah you don't mind it! I'm gonna be the best little sister EVER!" she chirps and then proceeds to bury her face into his neck and nuzzle him.
>You find yourself biting your lip as just a touch of wanting courses through you, thanks to timezone changes nightfall hasn't quite struck yet...
>"When you both said you had something to tell me I thought you were gonna say we were all going to go out for ice cream. Getting a big brother is WAY better than getting ice cream!"
>Anon cracks and begins to laugh at her statement.
>You find yourself unable to resist your sister's excitement any longer and find yourself laughing along as well.
>When you've both regained control of yourselves, Sweetie chimes in, "Do you think we could go and get ice cream anyway? As a family?"
>You look to Anon who shrugs back at you.
"Well, I suppos-"
>Her mouth finds itself magically held shut by a shimmering blue aura.
"But only if you'll stop doing that."
>She hums a series of noises at you through her pinched lips before you release her from your grip.
>Anon swings his little sister around so she can perch herself on his shoulders, "What kind of flavor are you getting big bro?" Sweetie chirps.
"I dunno, maybe vanilla peach."
>You blow a raspberry in surprise
>Thank Celestia he's feeling it as well, you were hoping that you weren't jumping the crossbow by suggesting he stay over tonight
>You playfully nudge Anon's leg to return his sentiment.
>He chuckles while Sweetie begins listing off the flavors she wants.
>Which eventually leads to hobbies she likes and things she and her brother can do together.
>While you're not quite sure he'll be very interested in going to the arcade with her, he certainly is keeping up the facade that he is, why he looks almost as excited as she does about the notion.
>You quickly dash the thoughts away of having an actor coltfriend.
>While it would be amazing to become Equestria's "power couple" and by default the most enticing herd to enter...
>No, you'd much rather he remain your professional and romantic partner "until the crowds don't remember your names."
>"I watch you when you sleep."
>You shiver and huddle under the covers.
>It makes no difference.
>Her gaze is still on you; the hairs on the back of your neck rise.
>All that can be heard echoing throughout your room is the sound of her heavy breathing.
>>Sweetie pushes back from him, luckily he'd already brought an arm under her so she didn't just throws herself back onto the floor, "Hay yeah you don't mind it! I'm gonna be the best little sister EVER!" she chirps and then proceeds to bury her face into his neck and nuzzle him.
I love how people who actually discuss and criticize a story get called shitposters
Meanwhile the writefag gets people who suck his cock like he's god and call anyone with a dissenting voice shitposters until the thread becomes an echo chamber
This is how generals die
Before I started writing it I thought about how Anon is the only one that we usually hear getting himself a herd and living happily ever after. People like reading it, people like writing it, I've even written it once or twice. But this time I wanted to write someone else getting him some ladies; ladies the audience might not be comfortable with.
To be honest, Anon, I'm not all that comfortable with giving Shining the mares he has. I've never watched Equestria Girls so I don't know how to write Sunset and I don't like Starlight all that much as a character.
But that's why I'm writing it like that. I always try to write out of my comfort zone or write something more than a little person every once in awhile. I've found that it makes me a little better as a writer and even gives me shit to think about.
That's why, when you look at my FimFic account you'll see weird or unusual stories. This is just the first one I've done here.
And I don't want any to suck any part of me random Anon. If you don't like my story that's fine, great even. Everyone has different taste and I understand senpai. I always make sure to read any criticisms for my stories and I do my best to learn from them
I'll be honest I love herding
But the herds in your story were boring herds, the characterization was spotty and overall story wasn't all that interesting
I normally like your stories but I'll be ignoring this one for now
Not a shitposter, just explaining that I didn't like it, but I guess noone can say anything negative about a story since they get called shitposters anyways
Ya I think giving shining those mares was a terrible idea
It really brought out the moonfaggot shitposters
that said it really didn't make sense to have a aunt in a herd with her niece
nor do I like lunaxcelestia herds much
but glad to know you were trying something outside of your comfort zone
obviously it's a yes since they are the same people calling the people who are criticizing the story shitposters
they are the real shitposters hammering down anyone who dislikes a story for any reason
guess opinions aren't allowed in here anymore
I honestly think you missed the point of the arguements
christ anons we got us a real live shitp