>"Must you always insist on coming over? Lyra isn't

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>>26154115
"oh, nothing important! These helium tanks I brought with me are just for show!"

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>>26154115
You can start by wiping that fucking dumb-ass smile off your rosey, fucking, cheeks! And you can give me some fucking candy: fucking swizzle sticks, fucking gumdrops, fucking peppermints, fucking candy canes! Four fucking rows of chocolates!

And I really don't care for the way your roommate left me in the middle of fucking nowhere with a fucking box of fucking candy that was fucking empty. And I really didn't care to fucking walk all the way across fucking Ponyville on my fucking feet to get back here to have you smile in my fucking face. I want some fucking candy RIGHT FUCKING NOW!

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>>26154115
i just wanted to buy some candy

>>26154144
Hold up a fucking second.
If you're already in equestria...Why do you still need helium tanks?

>>26154115
>cuddle bonbon

>>26154209
Helium is extremely flammable and poisonous in concentrated doses. Use your imagination.

>>26154209
>go to equestria
>all will be good now
>but wait
>summin aint right
>all the ponies are mean to you
>back home, everyone just ignored you
>here, they actively seek you out and insult you
>want to buy some candy
>get hurt by the sweet mare with the razorclaw-like personality

time to see pinkie about those bottles for her balloons, eh?

>>26154115
"I want you."

>>26154273
To show me the way?

>>26154259
>>26154144
I wasn't thinking about that.
And Another thing....I wasn't the one going to Breathe helium.
R.I.P. Inflate Chan.

>>26154115
>"Wait, you make candy? Tell me more."

Infiltrate Lyra/Bon Bon relationship. Be besties with both. Score free candy and music.

Ponies are not for sexual.

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>>26154304
This is by far the shittiest meme I've ever seen on this board.

>>26154115
i want hugs from you. i will pay you in rape

>>26154290
SHOW ME THE MEANING OF BEING LONELY

>>26154344
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBt8fN7mJNg

>>26154433
yes

>>26154447
RIP in Pepperoni Backstreet guys

>>26154247
But can it melt steel beams?

>>26154115
i want to cum all over your yellow face

>>26154209
To stick it up ponies' butts

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>>26154551
>Sticking helium tanks into ponies
Is this thread going where I think it's going?

>>26154631
Balloon fetish thread? NOT AGAIN

>>26154247
>Helium
>Extremely flammable

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>>26154652
Hold up anon.
There is a pretty fine line between Balloon and then there's...
>Pic

>>26154115
>hell
i was gonna be friends with you but then you showed your lesser intelligence good day my lady

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>>26154726
The only pone that has done that is Ponk.

>>26154744
>tips horsedora

>>26154247
You get an F in chemistry

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>>26154744

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>>26154777
Well would you look at that...

>>26154652
>balloon fetish
almost as bad as diaper

>>26154726
what the fuck is that shit

>>26154816
If it is not balloon fetish, then the alternative may be even worse. It is inflation.

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>>26154816
Somebody's Fetish.
Those Lunas.[\spoiler]

>>26154777
F for Fantastic?
or F for Fabulous?

>>26154157
All we have is John Candy.

>>26154115
Uh oh! It looks like a grumpy pony needs her snuggle wuggles!

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>>26154115
>You don't even come here for the candy I make

I'm here for a different kind of candy.

Is there any good Bon Bon green, I never can find any, even in threads about her.

>>26154845
>literal balloon
>something worse than that

>>26154867
F for failure.
#rekt

>>26154979
Nobody ever makes green for her. It's all about Loira.

>>26154115
Bon Bon's just passive aggressive

>>26154259
>>26154115
"But I did come here for the can-"
>She slams the door in your face
>Your outstretched hand recedes and you count the bits in it
>Definitely enough for some of her candy
>You knock on the door again
"Bon Bon?"
>"Just get out!"
"Lyra's here!"
>She opens the door
>You lied
>There's no Lyra
>Just some bits in your palm
>She glances towards your hand
>Reaches out a hoof
>And slaps the coins to the ground
>"I said you didn't come here for the candy. Now get out."
"But I have the money to pay-"
>"No one wants your money. No one wants to deal with you."
>She glances around
>"I don't even want to be seen with you. Just leave."
>Slam
>You kneel down and pick up the bits
>Why was she so mean?
>Why are all the ponies so mean?
>It's nothing like you thought it would be
>Maybe you'll come back tomorrow and try again
>You've heard her candy was pretty good
>But Sugarcube corner can do for now, you guess
>So you stroll onwards, trying to ignore the "Faggot!" and "Loser!" that ponies shout your way
>They're just having fun
>Your friends did the same, too
>It's all in good fun, right?
>The doorbell rings when you open the door
>All the ponies turn to face you
>You feel their seething gazes on you, prickling your skin as you walk to the counter
>Pinkie Pie
>Nicest pony in town
>She waves
>"Heya faggot!"
>You return a light wave
>Mr Cake's voice rings out from the kitchen
>"Is it that weirdo again?"
>"Yep!"
>"Just shoo him away, Pinkie."
>She turns towards you and points towards the door
>"Sorry, but Mr. Cake said so."
>Laughter
>Not just from the tables around you
>Even Pinkie is laughing at you
>What has gone wrong with the world?
"I just want some of those tanks for ball-"
>"Hellooo? Did you hear me? Outy outy!"
>She jabs her hoof towards the door
>Maybe you'll come back later
>You shuffle out, and feel the splat of a cupcake against the side of your face
>It felt deformed
>Like it was half-eaten
>The CMC high five each other
>Oh
>Just another day, you suppose

>>26155681
Had a good start but the feels but they sorta got cheap near the end, if you could have shown pinkie having reluctance in sending anon out or being nicer to anon that would have kept it a bit more interesting, but otherwise it was pretty good

>>26155681
>Go full edgelord.
>Plant jimmy rigged bombs in several key areas.
>Even if only a quarter of them work, it'll be worth it.
>Get lucky.
>Take down a lot more buildings than you expected.
>How feel, knowing you snapped and killed many of your bullies?

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>>26154115
Fuck you!
I'm Anon, the real deal, right down to the marrow of my bones

Don't lump me together with her faggot ass sex toys

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>>26155984
"Oh sorry, looks like there are still some left."

>>26155917
>feels
Shit, I was aiming for comedy. But I agree with you, reluctance would've probably worked better.

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>>26155681
Jesus Christ Anon.

That's hitting pretty close to home

>>26156114
of course it is

>>26156020
>Kill everyone you can in Equestria
>Not just the stallions, but the mares and the foals too!
>Find Celestia.
>She doesn't even recognize you as a sapient being.
>Banish her to the sun.
>Luna back to the moon.
>Discord to the whoopie cushion.
>Let Tirek out just to kill him too.
>Done with Equestria.
>Wonder if older dragons are harder to kill.

>>26156114

quit complaining black person you're not an Native American

>>26156306
calm down OPM

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>>26156306
>not keeping discord to rule along with you

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>>26154115

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>>26155681
That's a fucking kick in the balls.

well done, hurt like hell, but well done

>>26156395
Chara just wants to kill everything.

>>26155681

I want this to be like when king DDD bottled his anger up and kept absurdly calm and polite.

Until he had a mental breakdown

Make those ponies be nice to you, they dont deserver kindness

>>26157957
Deserve*

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>>26154247
>>26154867

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>>26154115
"I need about tree fiddy."

>>26158055
I ain't givin you no tree fiddy you god damn Loch Ness monster

>>26156069
So, you gonna continue this?

>>26154115
"Look, I'll level with you. One of my favorite pastimes back home was going to a place where people weren't afraid to call another out for their shortcomings, where everyone could freely be brutally honest, where slurs were practically friendly greetings."
"As much as I love this whole 'being accepted entirely by my friends' thing, I can only take so much of this saccharine crap at once. I come here because you're the only one willing to be brutally upfront and insult me."
>"O-oh. I had no idea it meant so much to you. I-I sort of enjoy our... conversations too. I'll make sure to insult you all the time then, human."
"Oh God, not you too. Stop being so understanding. Call me a faggot. Call me a fucking cock-sucking nigger faggot!"

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>>26158984