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>Lets have a Race Anon!
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You are currently reading a thread in /mlp/ - My Little Pony

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>Lets have a Race Anon!
>if i win your my slave forever!
>if you win I don't know i haven't figured it out it I'll let you decide
>so what happens if you win?
Wat Do?
This is going to become sexual.
Don't bother.

Unless she means "race" as in the social sense. Then it's just a matter of who can genocide the most ziggers, and I don't think Rainbow can bring herself to commit murder.
>implying any of us could beat her in a race ever

It doesn't matter what happens if we win. We won't

Even if she's not allowed to use her wings, she's still a goddamn horse

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You become my fuckslave, of course.
Okay, I'll race you. On two legs.
Prompt rejected
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>Allright PrideParade
>If I win you are my slave forever
>and no wings, this is a ground race. If you use your wings then you will automatically forfeit the race and become my slave.
Shit I got this guys
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>Y...you won?
>she looks down at the ground
>D...Damn it
>Fine Make it Quick
>You strike your best running pose, even bending down and stretching your finger tips out in front of you
>Dash looks at you with a satisfied smirk
>"You ready Anon? To the tree ahead!" She nods off to a distant tree at the end of the meadow
>You nod
>You can beat this slow dyke anyday of the week
>"Ready...." He wings flutter to life in anticipation
>Your legs and muscles tense up, stricken with urge
>Her nose inches forward
>The two of you are off like gunshots fired from lightning cannons
>The world around you turns into a soft-pallet blur
>You chunder and print a suicide note in the grass with your stamping feet
>You had to win
>Dash easily pulled ahead wearing her same confident grin like they were goggles against the air brushing against her peeled eyes
>The tree was growing larger
>Oh shit nigga
>Dash let's slip a victorious yell as she comes within feet of the finish line
>Your heart thumps and slams against your heaving rib cage
>Breath comes quick - in and out and in and out
>Arms and legs swinging terrible and triumphant arcs
>You fall neck-and-neck with her, a look of slow dawning horror spreads across her once beaming smile
>The tree is within inches
>You hold out your arm like a forward rudder and extend your finger tip, just cresting the length of Dash's nose
>Oh christ here goes nothing
>outracing a horse on the ground

you must be pretty confident
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just a gamble that she flies way more than walks= less muscle definition in legs

I do run 5 miles avg in 30:12.

If she can run faster than 10MPH then just call me Spartacus , Gannicus, or Crixus.
>Your finger crumples as it comes into contact with the tree, your body being pulled into your meager appendage and crumbling around it
>Dash collides headfirst into the tree as well
>The force of the impact sends her dancing off to the side and landing plainly in the grass like some derelict race-car
>You hold your ruined finger onto the tree, body bent around its' girth as a token of your victory
"Dash! I won!"
>You hear her mumble something into the clouds
>Wasn't important, because you won
>Your finger still hurts, but you go over to where she lay, towering over her with both hands on your hips
"Hear that rainbow dyke? I won."
>"I told you not to call me that, I'm not a lesbian," she's slow to get up
>Her trophy was a fist sized bruise on the center of her head
"Actually..." you crouch down and meet her at eye level. You wish she could see you smirking
"I'm going to call you whatever I want.
>"Anything but that-" She opens her mouth to protest but her words are like huge incomparable wads of gum
"As per our agreement, I'd like to officially inaugurate you as my personal servant for the day."
>Dash makes an exaggerated bow
>"Oh great and powerful Anonymous, please kill me now."
"Maybe later today." You offer.
"But first, I'd like you to hold still for me"
>Dash shoots a puff of air from her mouth and rolls her eyes as she stands rigid
>You unfasten your tie and quickly wrap it around her neck
>"Woah woah what the hay is this anon? You're not going to choke me!"
>She pulls against your leash but you give a snap of the wrist and yank her from the air and onto the cold earth
"It wont choke if you don't fight it." You inform her.
>She starts laughing a little, nervously at first
>"Okayyy Anon, good joke, now take this off of me."
>You fold one hand behind your back, the other holding her 'leash'
>Her breathing thickens and her eyes split open
"Anon didn't you hear me? Take it off!"
>She leaps into the air again but you snap her down
"C'mon." You start off towards town pulling her on the leash
>She stands against you bracing herself into the earth
>"NO!" She barks
>You pause and yank on her neck
>Dash yelps with pain and stumbles forward
>You pay her no mind, only feel her dead wait dragging behind you reluctantly
>She's still fighting you, but it's easy enough to tug on her collar and apply a nice commanding squeeze against her windpipe
>Town was just ahead
>"Anon, listen, I will do ANYTHING if you take this off and let me go. Anything!" She pleads
"You are doing anything. Anything I want, as my servant. Right now you're being my pet."
>"Your what?!" She shrieks and fights harder with the leash.
>You gruffly pull on her and reign her in
>"I'm not anyone's pet! Anon this isn't funny anymore!" She protests. Tears begin to bead in her eyes
"What funny is talking dogs. Those are funny."
>You strip a piece of cloth from your coat
>Bending down, you grab dash by the jaws and pry them open like a sealed casket
>In one quick motion you jam the cloth deep into her mouth
>She protests, gagging and squirming incessantly
"There!" You remark, standing to admire your handiwork
>Dash's ears fold back and now tears really start to slide down her cheeks
>She looks up at you trying desperately communicate her fear, her resentment and her sorrow
>You turn around, bringing her with you
>Town was just ahead

>You pull into town, a river of other ponies swims about you
>Dash has her eyes buried in the street beneath her
>She looks like she's burning with fever
>Still tears continue to plummet
"First place we'll go," You tell her, "Is rarities! See if she can make an authentic collar for you. Sound good?"
>She's silent
>Good enough for you

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Are you a fucking olympic runner? Because that's pretty fucking fast.
>6 minute mile on average
That's actually not bad, there are faster, but they go shorter distances
I just like running mate. I am fast runner, but I can't beat the sprinters that play for the track and field at my local university.
>eventually meets Twilight
>tells her about winning against Rainbow and making her his slave
>that's illegal
>tells him to release her
>he refuses, claiming he won fair and square, and a deal is a deal
>spends the next ten years in a dark, damp dungeon for enslavement
For some reason I read the first sentence as:
>"Lets have a race war Anon!"
And i got really hyped.
Then dissappointment followed.
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>downside to losing

I'd be okay with it either way.
For the Ranger PFT we had to run 5m in 35 min, but people were doing it in 30 min easy. Not me though, I was slow as fuck
>Distance race, no wings

Humans can outrun pones over distance, plus FIM pones have short legs, humans=long legs.

And the prize is... She has to spend all of her time with me forever. Not as a slave, but as a free pone.
I'll race the fuck out of you
>I'm going to force you to spend all your time with me
>You're still free though
'realistically' speaking, her terms of a race would be who can hit the finish line using their own body, so her using wings would be as normal to her as you using your lungs to breathe.

No way to beat her. It'd be a fucking 1 sided manslaughter, you can't outrun somepony that casually breaks the sound barrier, shit, she'd probably do a rainboom right over your head and deafen you just for the fuck of it.
If you were /fit/, you could possibly beat her in a marathon.
If she doesn't use her wings, a trained human could easily beat her in a race. Humans are designed to run and at their physical peak can do so for days. If the race was long enough, a man could easily outrun a horse because they simply couldn't run as long as a human can. Ponies having significantly shorter legs than humans would also benefit a man in a race.

That said, of course she's going to win because she'll obviously use her wings. Just enjoy the loss.
OP kills himself.
>Humans are designed to run and at their physical peak can do so for days. If the race was long enough, a man could easily outrun a horse because they simply couldn't run as long as a human can.
yeah a fit endurance hunter in Africa, not anyone on this website
>Not having faith in Humanity
I'm onto you, Satan. Begone from this place.
>that tfw when you see usain bolt fucking your dashie
>be human
>be known in the animal kingdom as a pursuant predator
>literary follow/chase things to death
>set up race so rainbow dyke can't cheat
>literally a "race" across equestrias main continent, pegasi offering food/drink support for racers
>rainbow duke wouldn't be able to make it more then a three days in before becoming too tired

Learn you some knowledge on humanity brah
If I win, than no more of these shitty prompts for green that no one wants.

To bad I never win at anything.
First of all, I didn't mention "anyone on this website." I was speaking generally that a man at his physical peak could run for days at a time. It just so happens that you see endurance runners in Africa because niggers are dumb and haven't invented any other way of getting food yet. Second of all, I'm sure SOMEBODY on 4chan could do it. One out of the millions of users across the world.
"Have a race"? Haven't heard of that before. Let's be white.
>anon luring Dashie into an endurance race.
>laugh as he passes her by as dashie hits her limit at day 3
I want this green
Have you always just said "Let us partake in a game of speed over a set distance"?
"Alright, Dash, I'll play your game. Let's race."
>"Awesome! Alright, let's go!"
"Wait, we need a finish line first."
>"Oh yeah. So where do you want to go?"
"Let's start at border of Griffonia and end at Great Sea."
>"What? That's like...three countries!"
"So you'll just have to be really fast."
>"Fine, whatever. Let's do this."
>You both head over to the starting line.
>On the count of three, you're off.
>Dash speeds ahead and disappears into the horizon, leaving a rainbow trail behind her.
>You jog ahead at a medium pace, making sure not to let your dick flap too much.
>You're ass naked, by the way.
>After the first day, your feet are incredibly sore but you keep running.
>Victory is going to be so worth it.
>On the second day, you swear you can see a tiny little rainbow in the distance.
>On the third day, you actually catch up to her.
>Dash is barely pulling herself along.
>She pants heavily, desperately trying to cool her overheating body off.
>You laugh ruffle her mane with your sweaty, auto-cooling hand as you pass her.
>Two more days pass before you reach the Great Sea and claim victory.
>You are met with fanfare and a feast.
>You stay in town for a week before getting some new clothes and heading back to Ponyville to confront Dash.
>She's sitting on a cloud when you see her.
>Staring off into the distance, she doesn't even notice you as you creep up underneath her.
"Hey Dash!"
>She yelps and falls off the cloud, landing at your feet.
>"O-oh...hey, Anon."
"Looks like I won. So, ready for my prize?"
>She closes her eyes tight and nods, ready for anything you could say.

>Be Rainbow Dash.
>Something hits your hoof, prompting you to open your eyes.
>You find a leash sitting there.
>Briefly you fear he wants a pet, but as you trace it back, you find it linked to a collar around his own neck.
>"I think you know what to do from here."
of course you can't be running without being naked, having a strong erection is mandatory so you remember which direction to go
This. If you ask around in the Dash thread, they're /fit/ as fuck. When I was in the Rangers I used to be able to do stuff like that.
>Promise to take her out for cider if you win
>Watch as she loses on purpose because she values getting drunk over winning.

>as soon as she agreed you had dropped by the treebary and had spike send off the missive
>contained in the letter was a formal request to Celestia to make you and dash's race a big deal with news coverage and the like
>Top cunt had no idea what she was getting herself into, which was actually quite sad
>Porchlight spackle had even co-authored a book with you establishing and defining human, well, everything as a means to try and normalize you in pone land
>and top cunt hadn't bothered to read it apparently, or was so full of herself she thought she could actually beat biological perfection
>well, evolutionary perfection on a couch potato anyways but still perfection
>days had passed, and you now stood at the starting line
>Rarity had made you a nice set of running clothes, Twi had helped with "barefoot" shoes, and Apple had helped construct a water bladder for you
>literary a magical concoction just plastered to the bottoms of your feet to protect them
>checking the time you found Rainbow would be late if she didn't show up soon and the gathered crowd and onlookers didn't seem as if that'd be very pleasing
>deep down you knew there'd be no way she'd chicken out
>her pride would help in this, in destroying her
>and in moments, with only a minute or two to spare, top cunt arrived
>if you had cared, you might have heard her insults and taunts as twilight and a judge came over and affixed her wing harness and checked her for magically prohibited enhancers
>you would have heard the slight concern in her voice as she realized she was being ignored and saw the determination on your face
>maybe you even would have heard her audibly gulp after twilight gave her a quick explanation of human biology and she realized how many had showed up for the "private" bet
>you even missed the look of desperation on her face as she realized that the princesses were there, even candy-ass
>but you didn't
>your eyes were focused on the road, muscles in your legs flexing like pistons made of steel and all noise and distractions blurred down to but a murmur
>the only thing you could hear was in your head
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>the signal went, and both of you were off
>Sanic the horse speeding away
>you began your trotting pace
>you might have noticed some of the fillys and colts laugh, the look of confusion on three princesses faces and many onlookers, or discord laughing hysterically because of what was about to take place
>a true tortoise and the mare
>but you didn't
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
> after the first three hours your feet went numb
>by the eighth hour, as the sun climbed into the sky you felt surprisingly cool and refreshed
>sweat glands yo
>you kept pace until you knew you needed a break, stopping only to power nap or eat
>maybe take a mad shit
>the second day you noticed and odd sensation in your lower back
>like having been punched there roughly, but enjoyable; very odd
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>taking a break to eat, you signalled a Pegasus down
>you had seen her around town at times, but her name was eluding you, no time to worry about it
>your flanks sported bubbles
"H-hey, food, also..," you gasp for breath a little, panting and wiping sweat free, "where's dash at in relation to me?"
> the grey mare handed you a sandwich, and at your motioning began to fill your water bladder on your back with about a quart of water
"Well... she isn't too far ahead, maybe about thirty minutes ahead of you..."
>the tone of her voice was surprising, it was as if she couldn't believe what she was saying
>you smiled involuntarily however
> and with that you tore into the sandwich, and drank about a pint of water
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>day four
>you passed dash yesterday, apparently she had passed out and required a full five hours or rest and hydration
>fucking casual
>passing her was incredibly rewarding and you couldn't help but grin
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>the look on her face was priceless
>knowledge that despite what she said or thought, her defeat was absolutely an option
>also, your feet felt like hamburger
>day five, dash had sprinted past you during your mandatory break period, no biggie
>you had stopped to fix an unforseen issue
>bubble-butt horse had to help, and watch, as you bathed and washed out your clothes
>you could have sworn you saw her drooling, whether it was your physique or the salt; you were certain it was the salt
>day six, after passing dash again bubble horse suddenly descended as if from Celestia herself
"Um..ah, Mr. Anon, s-sir,"
"Ye-a-h?" You pant out, keeping pace.
"You may end up winning the race shortly, due to rainbow dash not being able to continue."
>you simply did a thumbs up and grinned
>your other hand bringing the bladder straw to your mouth as you take a long draw of water
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>the only thing truly noteworthy was the strange sound your back was making
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>day seven
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>dash hasn't reappeared, but the race hasn't ended either
>bubble horse informed you she was roughly six hours behind, and lagging ever slower
>apparently hydrating and staying cool is a hitch when your covered in hair and don't have sweat glands
>her rest periods were getting bigger, from what you were told, and so was the amount of water she was needing to consume just to keep going
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>as tempting as it was, you weren't going to slow pace just in case
>why beat dash by a handful of time when you could inevitably beat her by over a day
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>day nine
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>dash is almost twelve hours behind already, holy hell what a lightweight
>its laundry day
>you swear you've caught bubbles stealing glances at you as you washed your clothes and bathed, mostly to the crotch or shoulders
>you can't be sure however, her eyes aren't straight on so it could just be your imagination
>also, you need to learn this horse's name
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>day nine
>grey bubble horse is definitely checking you out
>you heard wings rustle about while taking a noise during a stop, only to have her stammer out some none news
>dash is eighteen hours behind
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
So how is Derpy keeping up with Anon exactly?
>day ten
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>everything hurts, but your almost done
>ever minute or two-part of your body reminds you that it needs rest
>your feet hurt, knees feel like unoiled door hinges, and your back in clearly threatening to murder you
>almost done
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>unfortunately your newly formed goal is shot
>pace wise and distance, your certain you can only beat her at best by twenty-two hours
>close enough right?
Photo finish will be there to take your picture, bell namby-pamby might come out of retirement just to write the article
>maybe even get to meet THE Ms. Harshwhinny
>still a win, but by a very decent lead
>a very big absurd, laughable lead; by pony standards anyways
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>twenty minutes out, you can almost make out crowds in the distance waiting for you
>the moon is rising, maybe the princesses are there
>maybe you'll get a congratulatory kiss for winning and doing something extraordinary
>so, Luna, Celestia, or twilight?
>that would be the question wouldn't it?
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>you desperately want to slow down, to take a break, but that can wait
>your almost done, you can break then
>Three minutes out, it's apparent that your eyes didn't deceive you
> there's a sizable crowd, but more then just pone
>griffins, minotaur, and diamond dogs liter the crowd and they're all cheering for you
>stay hydrated, keep pace, only stop when necessary
>God your feet hurt, but it doesn't matter anymore
>you've crossed the finish line
Flying is faster
>And then, in Pheidippides fashion, Anon dies
It's not a race, but I wrote a very similar story back in 2012

>Day 456 in Equestria.
>Rainbow Dash boasts she can beat you at any sporting event.
>If you win, she'll do anything you want.
>She's so confident, she lets you pick the event.
>Easily beat her.
>Tell her to open her mouth.
>With tears in her eyes, she takes the entire length in her mouth.
>She spits.
>"This is so dirty!"
"You're not done yet. Put it back in your mouth."
>She does so, obviously disgusted.
>She involuntarily begins to run her tongue over it.
>You're loving it.
>Finally, after a minute, she spits the earthworm out.
>"There, I kept a worm in my mouth for a minute."
"And it was hilarious."
>"You know, when I said you could make me do anything you wanted, I thought you'd want to fuck me."
"lol why would i fuck a horse"
>Today was a good day.
U r a cool poiple Mr.Anon
Why wouldn't she just beat you and make you take her out?
>Anon, remembering all the shit he read on the internet about humans being pursuant hunters and running down horses and other animals, challenges Rainbow to an endurance race
>his dumbass forgot two important things
>those hunter were in shape from regularly going out to hunt, unlike his fat ass
>and these aren't 'Earth' ponies
>gets his ass stomped by a trained athlete
Enjoyable read, thanks for putting in the effort.
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Depends, Can I race you in an Arial Atom v8?
The funny thing too is horses are masters of the Marathon game as well. Because horses can sweat like humans they don't have to slow down and pant to ventilate heat from their body. All oxygen would be properly supplemented to the muscular system just like a humans would. The only thing humans had over horses was intelligence, but this is a world of modern and intelligent horses so..... Yeah you're fucked regardless.
>all the HFY in this thread
In 2002, Oleg Kharitonov ran the fastest 100-mile ever run, coming in at 11:28:03
In 2010, Yousuf Ahmad Al Beloushi rode Jayhal Shazal for 100-miles in 5:45:44

Humans, when properly conditioned, are ridiculously good at endurance running.
Horses, when properly conditioned, are much, much better.
But it is a race against a pone, not horse. Pones are much smaller and slower.
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