>Time, so much of it has passed.
>So long that I cannot even recall who I was.
>Did I have friends, family, a wife, or children?
>I guess none of that matters when you've been stuck six feet under for God knows how long.
>It sucks being dead, it's always so freaking cold!
>Yet, after all this time, I still wait here, even after every other voice has died off.
>Then I hear it, a whisper, and a glint of white.
>Ages, and ages go by, the voice ever louder. The light ever growing until finally, it hits me.
>I don't know what happens after this but, it has to better than this eternity of nothing I've experienced so far.
>"Return to us ancient one, Ye who were the masters of your time I beseech thee"!?
>"With your boundless power & knowledge heed my calling, and bring balance to the chaos that has come over this land and her ponies"!
>"With my life as payment I beg you to return from oblivion and walk amongst Equus again".
>Unfortunately for the summoner, the ancient one would not return from the grave for another millennium and a half.
>5000 years have passed since the world had last been graced by Alicorn.
>The races have fought amongst themselves and consequently have once again become their own separate tribes.
>It is the coming of age ritual for the young ones of your tribe.
>You are to venture up the mountain into the abandoned temple to receive your marking from the old one.
>Firstly we must know your race and gender before you embark on your journey.
>Today , if all goes well, you will finally become a stallion in the eyes of everyone everyone's eyes.
>You were so nervous, yet excited all at the same time.
>Even though everypony gets their Mark, only the first ten ponies have the honor of choosing exactly what their's is going to be.
>Everypony was gathered at the starting line, your parents were wishing you well on your journey.
>With all of us at the starting line we would soon begin.
>'I Mothis Silkwing will get into that lucky 10 spot'!
>An Elder Unicorn fired a magic flare into the sky and exploded in midair.
>Everyone bolted forth as the tried to get ahead of one another, knocking you to the ground.
>Your head was ringing and it has barely begun!?
>'Oh buck which way was it'!?
>The Mountain was high in the distance, with three path's we were allowed to travel.
>Some of us Traveled straight along the bridge, while others were hoping to follow the river and find a shortcut, and a few were going through the woods attempting to scale the hillside.
>What the buck do I do?
Placement 50/50. Last.
>8 people in this thread
>One is OP, so that makes seven players
Either someone's samefagging, or OP took off his name and replied to himself in an effort to steer his CYOA to where he wants it. Namely having a moth at the center.
I'm gonna guess that it's the latter one.
I don't, but checking the floor for dropped bits sounds good to me. Whil everyone else is doing that stupid race, we'll get to keep all the bits we find and buy a mothsicle. That's like a popsicle, but for moths.
Come on guys.
Obviously the race is more important than bits.
Let's fly to the top.
The others may not have flight.
Surely that's to our advantage.
As long as we try, we can win the race.
No one will beat us.
>Being the special little moth you are, you check the ground for dropped Bits, and hot damn! There are!!!
>10 Bits Get!
>Buck! Race that...You use your moth wings to hover forward towards the mountains to make up for lost time. The lush greenery below is soon enough replaced by the gray rocky mountain's and cold winds maki g the air arid.
>Luckily good old mum packed a fluffy winter coat in your saddlebag.
>With your extra comfort and protection, you look around for a path.
>You could try flying to the top...buuut, the Elder never specified if the temple was at the top or within the mountain even.
>But hey, the entrance could be at the bottom of the mountain for all you knew.
>None of the others went the way you went either so that's either a good sign...or a bad one.
>Where do I go now?
>After walking along for a bit and Smelling some nice mountain blooms.
>You contemplate using an avalanche to take some of the other racers out.
>You would get yourself and others hurt and your not that evil, are you?
>You wasting time, you need to find that temple?!
>Where do go first? The base, the summit, or maybe it's within the mountains interior?
No sir I did join in the voting, I am not one to stoop so low.
Mothalanche Achievement Get!
>Sucking in as air as you could muster, you shout to the sky above.
>The mountain shakes as the snow comes crashing down onto your fellow competitors.
>Many shouts and curses on your name could be heard as they were swept to the base of the mountain.
>Welp, they'll get over it eventually... Probably.
>Ascending to the summit and to your utter joy, the gargantuan double doors of the black stoned Temple could be seen.
>Coming upon the doors, it seems that the doors refuse to give as you press yourself against the doors.
>An inscription was etched into the door.
>'Announce the names of the elements that govern this world and ye shall be given passage into Galohein's hall'.
>What could these "Elements" be?
Solve the Puzzle
Sorry for shit name. You can change the name to whatever you want his name to be.
Many things come to mind and you say whatever comes to mind, after exhausting everything you could think of, the door slowly creaks open enough for you to fit through door big enough for a dragon.
>Throughout the tall interior, many torches adorn the walls.
>Many columns and tapestries are about and at the far end were what seemed to be monk's.
>As you got as close as you could, the monks advise you to exercise caution, for what it can give you, it may also take.
>The thing seated upon the throne was clothed in blue from Foot to head and it's face hidden behind it's mask, a blank one without holes for breath, or sight.
>It sat there taking ragged breaths, and was almost deathly still.
"Come, young one and ask the blessing which you desire to be branded upon. Some also take upon new titles to match their marking, so I may also do this for you." The old one takes a few more ragged breaths,and a long coughing fit before continuing.
"Lastly, if you are inclined upon it, may you take upon yourself a task for one such as I"?
>What do you take as your Cutie Mark?
>Do you change your Name?
>Will you do a favor for the Old One, or hear it out at least?
>The old one chants in a strange language as the symbol appears upon your behind.
>"Um, old one. What is this Cutie Mark supposed to mean"?
"The Mark bestowed upon you will make you and everything you do, greater than most others attempting the same act. You will be known as Little Thorn, The Great. For you will accomplish a great many deeds before your end shall come to pass".
>The old one give a nod to one the monk's as he heads down a hallway and after a few moments leads another Old One out.
>Although this doesn't doesn't seem as fragile as the one you met with. The Other comes before you and Bows it's head.
" This is Alterion of the Willowlands. Alter shall accompany you in all your ventures and exploits. All I ask is that you keep him from death's gate, and he shall help you however he can".
>Alterion gives you a pats on your head with his claw.
>Weird, why doesn't he talk as well?
Little Thorn the Great
Everything you do will better than most.
Alterion the Old One will be accompanying you.
>Are you OK with your choices?
>Doing the walk of your people, you mothwalk on out of the temple, Alter the old one silently trailing behind.
The Following day...
>After narrowly avoiding the wrath and its of the village folk and your parents.
>You and Alter are settling down for the night.
>This Old One still hasn't muttered anything in words, just complete silence except his soft calm breathes.
>Maybe he's shy or something?
>What should I ask him?
"I am a Titanocha, one of the few of my kind. We lived within the mountains for as long as time could remember. It has been a very long time since I've used this voice. We vow to serve those who pay a price in return. Although I should probably eat and drink something. I must accompany you and experience and learn any and all things until you relieve me or death takes you. No, I have no knowledge of the bitches whereabouts. Is there anything more you would want to know"?
>Anymore questions, or something else before you turn in for the night?
Titanocha: Tall draconic creatures born from the colliding of Harmony & Chaos. The clothes worn are for protection from sunlight, as it causes searing pain and blisters to appear on them. This may be from spending an untold amount of time deep within the mountains. However they seem to have extremely powerful magical abilities. They have claws at their hands and feet. Rarely do they venture from their sanctuary except as a coming of age ritual, the more knowledge and experience witnessed will determine what social class they are apart of.
>"So what's your favorite color "?
Alter pauses in thought as he ponders what that color is?
" I suppose black, or brown are my favored colors. So what is your favorite color. I don't really know what our "quest" will be but, I wish to experience as much as possible before I return to my home".
Well... We're going to have a problem, because I don't know what is my quest either
My mark tells me I'm better at doing certain things than other, but that doesn't tell which way to go
>Cool! Are you hungry? We should go eat!
>You lead Alter downstairs to have supper with your family.
>You had some cloth fibers with sap.
>Which by the way isn't that bad.
Alter seemed a little indifferent to it though. But he washes it down with some water.
Your were brimming with joy that an old one would travel with you out of all the others.
"Master Thorn, I realize that my current appearance may not be pleasing to the eye. If you want, I may change my appearance to one that is more familiar to you"?
>Do you want Alter to change his appearance(What race)?
>Anything else before you turn in for the night?
>You wish your parents good night as yourself and Alter return to your bedroom and rest for the night.
>Dreams of all the possible ventures of the world swirl in your head.
>Maybe you would be a great Hero saving the land.
>Or even an Adventurer seeing all the wonders the world has to offer?
>Your dreams were interrupted by your parents calling you down for Breakfast.
>After a hearty meal, your parents give you a rucksack to carry your things with some food and some money.
>You say your farewells as you cross the old cobblestone bridge into wide open world.
>Trotting down the green hillside and into flat opens plains.
>After a break on a lone tall boulder, you partake in lunch.
>With that out of the way you pull out your trusty map.
>You had come North from Moore, your hometown.
>If you continue South, you will eventually reach the town of Coltsburg, an average size town and a destination for a well traveled trade route.
>East will lead to Rockford Fort. Where those wanting to join the Northumbrian military can go.
>West leads to Merrymane Logging Camp, it's always looking for helping hooves.
>Hm? Where should we go now?
>Deciding some "memebux" you and Alter head towards the logging camp.
>You could see many workers hacking trees and transporting them to the lumbermill. You get a lot of cautious yet curious looks at your companion.
>You see a Foreman's Office, a General Store, and an Inn upon your first look around and there were even two semi circles of Tents set up.
>What will you check out first?
>Stepping into the woodcraft Office.
>You get directed to the foreman, an older gruff looking pink stallion eye's you up.
>He pulls a paper and ask's to sign the areas of work Your willing to do.
>Woodcutter: 5 Silver and 10 Copper per day.
>Trader: You get payment based on the types of loot and other valuables found in the Greenwood.
>Peacekeeper: You bring in outlaw's and Bandit's hiding within the Greenwood. Pay based on bounty of Outlaw.
>One half of Merrymane is a logging camp while the other half is a trading Post.
>Be sure to check the bounty board before heading out.
>Check the General Store for items that are in high demand to get the best profit.
>What types of work will you take up?
Moth Marston Achievement Get!
"Alright then, Peacekeeper, I'll just file your " friend " as a trader. You should prepare yourselves before heading out there alright ".
>Alrighty then. Let's get ready to head out.
>Hm, lets see what we have here?
-Map: Used to travel to different areas.
-Medium Coat: Helps keep you warm and cozy.
-Bits 10: Used to buy rare/valuable items.
-Silvers 30: Used to buy semi valuable items and equipment.
-Coppers 70: Used to food and other mundane items.
>Inside the GS you parouse the wares sold by the clerk.
Store! B10 S30 C70
>Flora Journal 15 Coppers: A detailed book on local plant life.
>Woodcutter Axe 10 Silvers: An Axe used by the loggers to chop down trees.
>Apple 2 Coppers: A Green One.
>Satchel 10 Silvers: Used to carry loot found.
>Dagger 5 Silvers: A simple but easy to wield weapon.
What will you buy?
Alter trails behind with a dagger and a satchel along the other journal..
"Let's check the wanted board before we venture out".
>Heading over to the Bounty Board you check out what was available.
-Mark I Beta Timberwolf: A medium size TW has been assaulting loggers nearby. Kill it for Reward. Silvers 40, Bits 10, ??? Shield.
Bounty I Grimleif: An earth Pony makes Refuge within the Greenwood. Bring her to justice!
Bits 15, ???.
Bounty I Hooded Mare: A strange Unicorn is doing shady business in the Greenwood. Bring her to justice.
Silver 20 Bits 5, ???
Mark I Trent: An evil tree is attacking any who come, do what you can to stop this.
Copper 40, ???
1 bit equal 30 Silver and 1 Silver equal 50 Copper.
>What Bounty/Mark's will you take on?
>You took on all available Tasks!
>You only have enough time to take on 2 tasks today.
>Completing certain conditions will get you rewards not stated on the board.
Alter is very fragile and has low mobility. Alter can become a different race to counteract this at the cost of his magic ability being lowered by at least half.
>What two Wanted missions will you do first?
>You love it when a plan "cums" together.
A Facepalm could be heard by Alter due to your pun.
>Anyhow the two head into the Greenwood.
>The birds and other forest critters chatting up a storm, the legendary Green Tress that remain green all year round for the last five hundred years due to dutiful and careful cultivation of her trees.
>Finally the two of you reach the end of the dirt path.
>Alter was looking at some flowers while you checked the local map.
>we have the Abandoned Hut, the Drip Drop Cave, Bloomview Meadow and a few other locations on the map that you could search.
>Alright, where do we go from here?
-Meadow(Flower Picking for the win!)
>Heading to Bloomview Meadow, Strangely enough the only meadow within the Greenwood.
>Alter takes his time to take in the view, and smells some flowers.
>He takes quite a few and places them in the Satchel.
>He quickly averts his gaze as you show off your flowers adorned shaft.
"By my ancestors, what is going in that head of yours"? With a shake of his head, Alter follows your lead.
20 Flowers Get!
>Where to next?
>With speed and might of a lion you bound towards the hut.
>Unfortunately Alter is left behind due to his frail stature.
>Finding the Hut by a little stream, you check the interior noticing that someone must have been here recently.
>You find a bunch of weird trinkets and alchemical agents about as well.
>Finding that whoever was here wasn't home, you are about to head back to Alter..
>A Bolt of magic whistles bye missing you by centimeters.
"Who are you to trespass in my home"!?
>Turning around you spot a yellow mare clothed in a blue cloak with her light green mane covering some of her face. Her purple eyes shoot dagers into your very being.
>What do I do!?
>The Unicorn is not amused.
>However Alter finally catches up to you as he into a coughing fit, clearly not used to such physical feats.
"*Cough* I *Wheez* finally caught up to you. Please remember that I'm not the most fit of person's, I'm like glass really".
The Mare seems to be confused by Alter's appearance and can't make heads normtails about him.
>You offer her some "flowers" which in a few moments, sports a face of disgust as a green Aura forms on her Horn.
"Alter, if you would something else to diffuse this volatile situation other than...that? I would advise you do so now".
>Hooded Mare is Angry!
>Alter is Concerned.
>What will you do?
>Damn! She is fuming at this point.
"Not when they are placed upon one's sheath you oaf, you foul pervert"!
>The Mare fires another blast which missed thanks to your Dodge roll.
>You return fire by throwing your Axe right towards her face!
>She dodged the Axe and charged up her Horn once more.
" Fug my life". Alter wasn't as fortunate as you as he lay sprawled out on the grass.
>Aw Sheet Bucker, what cha gonna do now?
Call her ugly and start rolling all over the place
Try to knock her over while rolling
>Mustering your angriest face you make "angry moth noises" which confuses the Mare.
"Can somebody swat that fly please, its driving me to drink"!
>The Mare infuriated by the insult rapid fire's several major Bolt's at you.
>Luckily your ability to roll around like a foal having a seizure worked!
>As she she is knocked over by your rolling.
>The Mare is knocked over!
>Alter is still down for the count.
>You give her a gentle cuddle which takes her by surprise.
>Her cheeks become rosy red in embarrassment as you put your "flower" beside her face.
>She attempts to protest as you grab her head and force your Flora into her muzzle. She starts to gag as your length reaches the back of her throat.
>As you piston back ad forth into her muzzle, you notice little sparks starting to form o her Horn.
>Can't have magic ruining your fun now.
>You put hoof on her Horn as you start to vigorously rub her Horn.
>Soon enough magic sparks off her Horn, as her cries and sobs turn to moans of ecstacy.
>With your load almost upon you, you redouble your efforts as the pressure becomes almost unbearable.
>But finally you release your package into her throat as burst after burst of your love sap overwhelms her as here sweet nectar splurges onto the ground as you you finish with a little bit of icing on her muzzle.
With the dead done, Alter picks her up and cleansher off before you both return to Merrymane.
>You receive your payment from the Foreman leaving you some free time and some more coin to rub together.
>The Hooded Mare was sent to the Jail at Rockford Fort.
>What shall you do to celebrate?
>With victory at hoof you and head to the inn to celebrate how you "slayed" the hooded Mare with your flower power.
>Many drinks later and the night comes to a blur.
>You were hitting on some lumbermare named Lumbra Millward and the rest sorta fazed out.
>When you came to, you were in bed with the lumbermare from last night. Your "flower was still inside her " Hollow Log" too.
>Buck! You wish you could recall what must have been a good time last night.
>You slowly remove yourself from her while she moans softly in her sleep.
>You get to your albeit shaky hooves ready to find out just what the happened last night?
Merrymane Inn, Morning.
>Do you leave the Mare you bedded last night and look for Alter, or wake her up?
>"Ah, Moth pony, the Chosen One, surely he will bring Order and Harmony to this land once again."
>Alter: "Thorn, shouldn't we working on our quest instead of engaging in intercourse, consensual and non-consensual, with everything with mare-ish features?"
"Hey, all I was told was to go out into the world and do stuff, and *unf*, I'm gonna 'do' stuff. That stuff just happens to be mares.
>"And what about that stallion who looked like a mare?"
"A wiseman once told me 'If its cute, fuck it.' And those words have yet to lead me astray."
>Exiting the bedroom into the main room.
>Tables, chairs, and many ponies lay sprawled across the room as though a twister had Tore through.
>There was even an Earth pone hanging from the chandelier, Strangely the most sober looking one out everypony here.
>He gives you a wave as you tiphoof over ponies passed out drunk and some trying to recover from their hangovers.
>Outside was slightly better at least.
>You eventually find Alter playing checkers with the clerk from the general store.
Alter gives nary a glance as he takes the last black the clerk had left.
"So you have fun killing brain cells, and partaking in acts of carnal debauchery"?
>What will you do first today?
"It would have been more fun if I could remember what I did. And you could learn to live a little. But no sense dwelling in the past. Onwards to our next job."
Check inventory, see if we lost anything.
Then go out and hunt Grimleif.
"Sorry but but I prefer pleasures of the mind rather than body. Music, literature and the like are more my tastes. Besides, I had to make a vow of celibacy for even the opportunity of seeing the world. Anyways, I kept your things safe in the meantime".
>And so our Moth Hero and his Companion Alter venture once into the Greenwood to apprehend the Outlaw Grimleif.
>" Are you seriously narrating what were doing Alt"?
"Whaaat? No, that must be the wind blowing in the breeze".
>"Fine whatever. Let's go find this Mare".
>With your trusty map in hoof you mark down the most likely places she could be residing.
>We have...The Old Watchtower, the Drip Drop Cave, and the Abandoned Griffon Hunter's Camp.
>The all seem pretty likely places to find her at.
>So, where do I go first?
>Heading towards the cave the cave, Alter grab's some wild mushrooms as you travel deeper into the dark interior of the cave.
>The drip drop of liquid can be heard echoing throughout nthe cave.
>Some muttering is heard off in the distance as the you follow the one path.
>What should we do? Maybe some sneaky sneak to get the jump on her?
"Oh right, one moment if you would? Kolvek, invise, molokye".
>A thin blue Aura appears on your hooves as not a sound is made by your hooves.
>Creeping ever closer, you take cover behind a wall as you see the Mare searching through stolen belongings.
" Junk, junk, ooh nice ring. Buck I hate living in the bucking sticks". The grey Mare had long flowing mane of a dark grey, and her mark with was a skull encircled by leaves.
>Well, you have the element of surprise on your side this time. How will we be approaching this?
>*Sneaky Moth Noises*
>Creeping up like a mouse behind the unsuspecting Mare with your Spear coming forth.
>It's about to go down.png
>You push her to the cavern floor as you start to push into her passage.
>She yelps and screams in pain as you push your length inside her butt. As her yells turns to whimpers and sobs, you begin to thrust into her once more as you you grunt in pleasure as you eventually break the vice grip as her arse becomes smooth sailing thanks to the pre from your Spear. She attempts to bounce back along with the rhythm of thrusts as your balls slap against her slit. With the dam about to break, you quicken your pace as you couldn't delay no longer as you deliver your payload, painting her inside white as she slumps to the ground Unconscious.
>You may turn Grimleif in for the reward, or take her into service to you?
>What will you upon returning to Merrymane once again?
>After returning to turn to town you sneak Grimleif into a room before anypony suspect's anything.
"Thorn, we need to do something about her...situation. She's a wanted Mare we haven't anyway of lifting such a bounty. Maybe you know somebody at Rockford that could get her Bounty repealed"?
>My Uncle Buck Shoehorn?
>My half-cousin Markent of Arabella?
>My half sister Nacht Fallmoon?
>My Uncle Buck Shoehorn?
>After the long journey, and peace has been restored to the land, Alter returns home
>He is asked what he has learned on his journey.
"The Chosen One, Thorn, is the strongest, and most fearsome warrior on this planet, and the greatest threat to it. However, I do not believe we need fear him, for his only motivation in life is to, and I quote, 'plow ponuts'. So long as there are mares, and stallions who look like mares, for him to pursue, I believe his power can be kept in check."
"Alright, I'll stay here while you go get help from your uncle, I'll be sure to keep her disguised until your return".
>With reassurance from Alter, you set off towards Rockford.
Rockford Keep, Besieged Day 2.
" Lord Shoehorn! Your nephew is reported by the side gate"!
>"Gods, first plucking goats and now this"!?
>I've got to help my nephew but, if these goats break down our walls were screwed.
"Milord, your command"!?
>" Damn what will I do"!?
-Archers! Cover My Nephew!
-Archers! Keep that Ram at bay!
>"Archers! Keep the Ram at bay"!
The Unicorn Archers got to their positions as Markent lead them as they loosed Arrows upon the attackers below.
>Thorn managed to fly to the battlements but was struck by a stray arrow in the back hoof.
>Your healer give him a quick patch up as he joined you at the outer wall.
>"I'm glad your safe nephew but we're in a little bit of a pickle as you can see.
"Yeah, it's about two hundred of us against 500 of the Goatae hammering at our front door"!
>"Alright, just grab your weapon of choice and hurry back. We need every helping hoof we can get.
-Brace the Gate!
-Arm the common folk with weapons.
-Grab weapon of choice?
-Release Hooded Mare from Dungeon?
Assuming we only get to choose one:
Shoot the Ram.
Brace the gates
Sword for when/if it gets to melee and crossbow for picking off units till then.
Release her, gonna need all the help we can get.
And its not like she can run away, she's surrounded by an enemy force that'd probably do a lot worse to her.
"Alright Stallion's! Let's show them what the Cantermore Royal Guard is made of"!
>The Archers target the the RAM once more as the RAM stop's in it's track's.
>" Brace the Gate Men, we need to buy ourselves more! Captain Penrod, arm the Common Folk with Swords and crossbows and have them at the ready"!
"Yes Sir, right away"!
>Meanwhile you remember the Mare you imprisoned here as well.
>After finding her cell key, she gives you only a nod as she runs off.
optional: Burning Shot, Whistling Shot.
-Find Nacht, your neice.
-Find Charlemane, your Satyr son.
-Get your weapon of choice
If the RAM is made of flammable material, burn it down. Once it's completely destroyed we can focus on the enemy troops.
Not really sure what Whistling Shot is/does.
Motivate troops, anyone who isn't prepared for combat should already be somewhere safe so their whereabouts shouldn't be an issue.
Equip crossbow and start dropping targets. Keep an eye out for anyone who may be high priority, and especially for more siege weapons like ladders.
>The archers use burning Arrows as the RAM is torched. Yells of praise resound throw the ranks as Buck rallies the troops together as you join them in fires crossbows into the enemy ranks.
"By the gods, another plucking Ram and this one's metal reinforced"!
>The Goat's return fire against you as Arrows flit into the air.
>Hug that wall, or retreat back?
>Everypone presses back against the wall as some shield's go up.
>Luckily only a few troops were hit.
"Return fire on those Dastards"!
>Another exchange of Arrows is volleyed at the ever encroaching force.
>Even as you fell many in each volley, several more would take their place.
>Eventually the Ram reached the Gate as it began crashing against the door.
"Thorn, we need to Hold the Gate so that the rest can escape lest they break through and kill everypony in these walls".
>Somepony must defend the Gate...Who will it be?
>Little Thorn, The Great
>Buck, The Humble
>Markent, The Fearless
>"Uncle I can't just leave you guys hanging while I would off, no buts, just go"!
>Buck was about to protest but Markent pulled him away respecting your decision.
>As you gathered your troops together, the Ram busted a hole into the Gate as Soldiers piled through the gap.
>Soldier hand me my...(Choose your Weapon).
>Your soldier tosses you a Sword in time to parry a strike from a blessed as you thrust it into his neck.
>Your forces clash against one another trying to beat the other back.
>However an important looking Goat comes through the gap.
"It's Ares of the Goatae"!
>You were distracted for a moment as a boat rams you to the ground and was about to cut finish you.
>But a Spear impaled into his neck saving your life.
" Charlemane is here! Rally to your Lord"!
>Your pulled up to your hooves as the satyr readies his Sword and Shield.
"Alright Thorn, you pick one and I'll take the other".
>Who will you fight?
>Clyde, Rameses Third-born?
>Ares, Rameses First Born?
>Bill Lee, Clyde's Bodyguard?
>as a boat rams you to the ground
I imagined this.
Anyways, go for Ares.
>Oh buck he's huge!
"You think a little shit like you can take the likes of me? Your way out of your league.
>You barely Dodge his opening swing of his warhammer,as you try to outmaneuver him.
Charlemane seems to be handling himself exceptionally well having already taken out Clyde's Bodyguard. And follows up with a Sword plunge into Clyde's neck.
>Ow, the pain!
"Thats it time to meet your ancestors bug"!
He readies his hammer to to crush you but.
" Gah, fucking bitch!"
>A Dagger lay lodged in his side, as he proceeds to strangle the life out of the hooded Mare.
"Thorn, I need help over here"!
He struggles to fend off multiple foes at once as he barely fends off their attacks.
>Oh buck, who do I help?
>Hooded Mare, she saved my life.
>Charlemane, He's family.
Fuck, it's TWD all over again.
>2 people in danger
>have to choose one
>the other is gonna die
I wanna say we owe a life debt to Hooded, but shit Charlemane saved us too.
Fuck it. Save Hood. Charlemane is in danger, but Hood is being choked out. Just gotta pray he holds out long enough to get Hood, deal with Ares, and get to him.
?You choose to save the Hooded Mare.
>Grabbing your Sword you rush over run your Sword into his side and finish with a buck to get him off.
"Th-thank you". She readies a spell as the two of you fight your way to him with magic and Steel.
>You imagined the worst to have happened to him but thankfully.
>He was still alive and bucking.
"*Huff**Huff* looks like I didn't need help after".
>" Your hurt"?
"Yea, yeah I know lets get out through the back gate before we lose everything".
>Hurrying to slip away before the main force arrives you arrive at the east wall.
" Where is that little Thorn in my side! I'll send all three to death with open hooves"!
>How can he still run in his condition!?
"I'll hold him off, you need to go before you die as well".
>" Are you mad!? I won't just abandon you now"!
"Damnit just listen to me and fly away you fool"!
>What should I do?
Logic:"Fine, brother I wish you luck".
Emotion:" We stand together, in victory, and defeat ".
>"All for one, one for all".
"Wow, I see your not going to change your mind. OK. To the Last"!
>The two of you charge together matching blow for blow and it seems to be working.
>However Ares knocked Charlemane's Sword away and knocked him over the wall!
" Your next moth".
He readied for another ram as fumes shoot from his nostrils.
>'Was this it'?
Grab Charlemane' Sword!
Evade the charge and go for the sword.
Keep his attention and pray to all the bones of the saints that Hood takes advantage of the distraction, cause it's doubtful we'll win in a straight 1v1 fight.
>With mothlike reflexes you roll away from his charge and grab the Sword.
>"glk"!? Ares lifts you into air to c rush you onto the stonework.
>With the Sword you pierce his neck with the Bastard Sword and push off and into the air.
>The Ram tumbling over the wall into the ground below.
The Hooded Mare Disappeared?
>It was time for you to return to Alter you guess...
Chapter 1 Complete!
Apprehended Two bounties!
You spared Grimleif from the block.
You got caught up in a war.
You stayed behind to allow the others to escape.
You choose to Save the Hooded Mare.
Charlemane is Presumed Dead...
You successfully killed Ares.
Ranking: Honor & Sacrifice
> Your honored your debts and protected those that were close to you.
A week later.......
"Hey ya know that alcohol isn't going to make you feel better".
>" I know but, just leave me be okay ".
" Alright, but If you see a blue stallion with a black mane wandering about, that'll be me. I'm tired of being so tired and frail all time".
Alter departs from the bar to do whatever it is he does when you aren't around.
>Maybe it's time to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
>What's done is done and you did everything you could.
>But what should I do now?
Leader: Little Thorn "The Great" of Moore, Northumbria. A moth pony with a brown Coat and a creme colored mane. Described as being ferociously passionate and following no clear course in his actions.
Advisor: Alterion du Lebrix, "The Bruce":accompanying Little Thorn. Has connections to the Bruce of the Willowlands in the Sutherlands. Prefered Equine look is a blue coated Stallion with black mane. Enjoys Music, Literature, and Nature.
Vassal:Grimleif, A earth Pony who resorted to banditry to survive after her people were all but wiped out by raising parties from Diamore. She would eventually be captured and spared by Thorn.
She serves under both Thorn and Alter Simultaneously. She is wary, clingy, and pragmatic.
Enjoys Nature, and Friendship.
Vassal: Meteora, A Unicorn mare who was ousted from her Magic school for dabbling in ancient magic. She fled into isolation until she would be captured by Alter, transported to Rockford and escape in the ensuing Seige. She resents Thorn yet serves as a vassal of Alter for reasons unbeknownst to anypony.
>You find Grimleif eating some breakfast with Alter in his Earth form. She greets you as Alter hands you some fruit.
>What Questions do you ask Grimleif?
>A blush forms on her face.
"Oh, your fine, not like you were the first to do so. Alter has been helping me along and I'm pretty hoofy with a knife, or a crossbow even. This Stallion named Merc showed how to once. And I'm not too shabby with Sleight of Hoof either".
Any other questions?
So typical rogue skills.
That's a good sign.
Ask if she knows of any interesting rumors, since currently we're not up to much other than hunting, and raping, bandits and I think we're out of rapable bandits. Unless the evil tree is rapable. We should find that out.
>The War of the Races Quest can be embarked on by traveling to Moorewyck Castle.
>There are currently no prospective allies within the area.
>The Merrymane Family will support you in the War of the Races.
>Justice for Umbermore Sidequest can be started during the Race Wars.
>Anything else you would like to do before traveling to Moorewyck?
>After you attempt to hit on Grim, Alter says that there would be time for that later. After a few days and quick visit with your parents, you proceed to Moorewyck Castle, Deep within the Mothswood.
The skeleton crew of staff help get you settled into the stone castle. With fine silk banners along the wall but strangely enough blank?
>After some complaining, Alter lets you and Grim practice your "Stamina Exercises" luckily not knowing what that exactly meant.
>An hour or so later, you were to meet Alter in the council room.
>"Alright, Alt, what do you need me for"?
"Well for starters, you should of a few things first before we charge in headfirst".
Alter places some books before you. What will you learn about first?
>Houses & Families of Northumbria and the Westerlands?
>Filling out positions in the Household Roster?
>Define Possible Ally and War Target?
>The skeleton crew of staff help get you settled into the stone castle. With fine silk banners along the wall but strangely enough blank?
I feel like I wanna play Suikoden now. But not 4, 4 is total dogshit.
"OK then for Us in Northumbria, we have the Wyck's".
>There is us of previously disbanded House of Moore and our Overlord Family Wyck. We are currently her weakest house naturally. We are known as the Silk Branch of House Wyck.
>Above us is the house Dun of Wyck, they are the Earth Branch and have a vast hold on metals and precious gems to the north.
>Valewyck is the Pegasus Branch and controls the lowlands to the south of us.
>Glynn of Wyck is the original and capital seat of the Wyck Houses and prides itself in her Royal Unicorn Guard. It is based next to the Vane Moore river leading to the ocean.
>Kelnwyck is the past branch and currently headed by Holly Merrymane whom controls the Greenwood.
>Fullford: The base of the Ford family and consequently the most powerful.
>It has the smaller Vassals of Helmford, Woolford, Deelford, and Yulaford as her weakest.
Rockford was also recently taken back as well unfortunately. Although only Rameses is left to lead their house.
>We also have the Everfree, and Evershade Houses further north of us. They make the best ships, shield's, and the best Archers this side of Equus. Although it would prove difficult to et their support but it would be worth it in the long run.
"Alright that should be those of import in the immediate surrounding land's. Next we should enlist ponies into the Household to bolster her ranks.
>Are you ready to recruit more members into the Household?
As much as we'd like to, we can't stay here boning Grim forever, so let's go broaden our horizons. If we're leaving the castle let's go to whereever Dun of Wyck is.
So far our only ally is Merrymane, correct? Anyone else we'd have to go meet up with our something?
>You currently must venture to Glynnwyck to swear fealty to the Wyck's.
>You can go to Dunwyck to trade for metals and gems.
>You may also recruit peoples of Kelnwyck, Dunwyck, and the Ever's to join you.
>Do take caution as to not reveal the Military strength of Moore unless you want to get our Arse handed to us and become someone else's bitch...if, were lucky.
>Where will you go first?
>Castle Moore is below average in her upkeep and maintenance due to the destruction of the house 300 years prior.
>You and Alter leave Grimleif at the castle while the two of you travel to Dunwyck. The mountainous terrain helped the denizens thrive with the ores and gems located deep within the mountains.
>The Master of Dunwyck doesn't seem to mind your visit.
>You had permission to recruit peoples into Moore.
-Rexlord of Marigold, Earth.
-Obsidian Pie, Earth
-Jasper of Diamore
-Anvilnus, Blacksmith, Earth
-Fair Trade, Trader, Earth
-Castellani, Castle management, Earth
>Alter directs the ones chosen towards Castle Moore while the two of continue onwards to get more guys under your banner.
>Introductions would come later.
>Now then, do we risk going to the Ever's or just head over to Merrymane?
>Making your all the way over to Merrymane, Lord Holly Gives you a warm welcome and allows some of his vassals to join you.
-Oaken Shield, Hedge Knight, Male,
-Millyard(That one Mare you can't recall boning).
-Chopper, Earth, male, woodcutter
>With the three of them sent on their way, we have enough time to try our luck at the Ever's, or we can return Moore for the day?
What is this "sleep" you speak of
>And so you and your new companion's return to the Halls of Justice, wait I meant Castle Moore that's the ticket.
>Who do you want to meet first?
"Anvilnus at your service, be it 10 Swords or a hundred, I'll get em' forged in no time flat".
" Lord Thorn, I am Castellani and I shall work tirelessly to bring this castle up to par and beyond".
"I'm Chopper, a simple woodcutter, but chopping trees is what I'm best at".
" I am Ser Rexlord Marigold, I'll be the arms master is that's fine with you milord".
"I'm Oaken Shield, I'll help out where ever I'm needed".
" Oh um good evening my lord. I'm Jasper and I'm to assist with paperwork and such yes"?
"Hey lovermoth, Great to see ya again. I'll try not to get in the way too much.
>With introductions out of the way you settle down to relax for the evening.
>What do I want do now?
First talk to Castellani, see if he can put an estimate of how much time and money it'll take to repair the castle.
Then talk to Rexlord, ask him if he knows of any knights/warriors/fighters/whatever that we may want to keep a look out for to recruit. And then ask him what he thinks of our combat abilities, and if he can help us improve.
Talk with Grim, ask her about herself and her people. Gotta get the Relationship points up.
>"Hey Castellani, how much time and funds is it gonna take to get the castle ship shape".
"Oh um, it will be quite some time but our builders could get the castle repaired in about a month or so".
>"Thanks, have you seen Rexlord around "?
" He should be in the Yard training some of the recruit's ".
>Looking down on the yard you see Rexlord giving your Moth recruit's a good thrashing and giving pointers whenever he knocks them down.
" No no no! With a physique like you little gys, you need to use that mobility against bigger and stronger opponents, and try to parry and Dodge. It's your best bet".
He notices you and turns towards you as the trainee uses the opportunity to strike Rex on the head with the training sword.
"Good job Motthias, take every advantage you and you won't make a fatal mistake".
" Well milord, what can I do for you "?
>" Well I want to know what you think of my Combat abilities and maybe some pointers on what to work on"?
"Sure thing, lets see what you can do? Punch my chest as hard as you can".
" So you see, a Mouth-grip style Sword can be useful as it allows you full control of your Shield in your hooves. Oh and if you to find the best fighters then then Everfree and Evershade is where there at. They respect strength, skill, and an iron will. So don't EVER pussy out of a challenge, even if you get the tar beat out of you. Hel you might even make more friends losing than winning. They admire perseverance.
>"Thanks Rex, I'll keep that in mind.
At the other other side of the yard you find Grim practicing with a crossbow.
She gets one last Bolt into the dummy target before setting down on a bench.
>"So Grim, I'd like to know about how you and your people were like"?
"Well I was a servant of of Lord Umbermore. After our Overlord House got into a war with Diamore, they sent a decoy force to distract our main army and they swept through in a wave of flesh and Steel. I survived among the bodies of the dead until I could finally slip away. I still hope that somepony managed to survive as well. Thanks Thorn, it was good to get that Off my chest.
"Oh, you charmer"...
One hour later...
" Thank you Thorn, you know how to press all the right buttons".
>After more sexy time with Grimleif, it was now time to find a few extra troops at the Ever's or head over to Glynnwyck to swear fealty now?
>Go to the Ever to bolster Your ranks, or go to Glynnwyck straight away?
>You head towards The Twn houses of Everfree and Evershade.
>The walled city built around and with the Forest.
>There were a few places you could try to find some recruit's.
>You could ask the Bastard son of Lord Timberbuck, Arryn to help you, and at best join you.
>You could check the Sellsword company office, or even a few volunteers if all else fails.
>Do you recruit troops behind Arryn's back, or ask him permission and/or for help from him personally.
>After requesting audience with Lord Arryn you are led into the Blue Palace. The banner of Arryn Everfree was a white Crown with a Sword in the center with a dark blue background.
>You are led up to the last heir of Everfree.
"Never in my families history would we expect a fucking Moore to walk into his age old enemies front freaking door. You better have something good, for being here. And be quick about it before I get the bright idea to kill you right here and now"?
>Convince him to help you, or at least let you leave Alive?
The race war concerns all of us, even despite our ancient strifes, we are on the same side in this battle
We did not come to ask you to peldge anything of you own, but simply to get your permission to enlist the volunteers and braves in your lands who wish to fight for our cause
This cause is fair and just, and the heroes of this battle will be crowned with glory until the end of times
"Ya know, I don't give a flying pluck about glory, just causes or even this fucking war. But I don't think you will be taking my men to die for what you believe to be right or wrong. I for one have a devilish idea. In exchange for your life, you can swear fealty to me. You will go to to " pledge" fealty to the Wyck's and when their Guard is down, you shall kill any Wyck's present at Glynn Castle while I will mop up the stragglers. Doesn't that seem like a fair deal"?
>Oh buck, what do I say.
"Splendid! Usually you Moore's are known for their " stubbornness " so as a token of good faith, my Bolt Guard shall accompany you to Glynn. I trust to see them alive and well when I get there alright.
Wonderbolt' Wondergust, and Bolt Breeze accompany you.
Shadowbolt' Nightfall and Duskfall accompany you.
>Returning to the Castle you must prepare for the outbreak of violence that would soon occur.
>Will you follow through with Arryn's "deal"?
>Who do you bring with you to Glynn?
We in our own place right?
So how about instead, all our team beat the crap out of the two asshole Arryn gave us with help of a little camouflage spell from Alter on us and Grim, torture then so bad they're going to be willing to say anything, then inform the Wyck of Arryn's bitchiness as we pledge honour to them as intended?
>Setting a plan to turn on the Bolt Guard was about to be carried out when Oaken busts into the room. "Lord Thorn! The Dunwyck's are marching upon us as we speak. We must ready ourselves for the attack"!
" Oaken why would Dun do such a thing"!?
"Don't know Rexy, but probably because they're tired of getting their wood from Merrymane".
>What should we do?
-Call upon Merrymane for help?
-Defend the Castle!
-Get aid from Arryn?
>Everyone else prepared the defense of Moore.
>The Emissary returns with a letter from Dun.
>The Wyck wanted to install their own relatives as the rulers of Moore.
>They're going to kill you off so that Wyck will attain complete control of the northern territory to Northumbria.
>A Rider from Arryn arrives to warn you of Dun.
>Some shady business is going and they want you out of the picture.
>Merrymane will side with you against Wyck.
>What message will you send to Arryn?
Alright, fuck that shit, we're going rogue
We were way better off when we were a simple pony whose greater possession could measured in silvers
Since we decided to become knights or whatevevs, the amont of people being dicks to us incresed a hundred fold
Gather your troops and tell them you plan on leaving because you never signed for this kind of shit
you're going to become a simple adventurer and never pledge loyalty to anyone ever again, because that fucking sucks
Oaken is the new boss, everyone do whatever he says
you're out, however feels the same is free to come along
Then find the a way to flee away out of sight front the two armies
>"You know what fuck this shit, I'm out"!
>You packed your things as marched out from Moore. Grimleif, along with Alter and Meteora, wherever the hay she has been.
>You left and never looked back as you left the land torn apart by infighting behind.
A few months later...
>After a trip across the sew, we were ready to make a new start without the bull of politics.
>Unfortunately, Alter couldn't accompany you and returned to the temple wishing you farewell.
>Welcome to Elysia, the boundless land where nomadsmand tribals live across the fertile landscape.
>With a paltry sum of Bits you survey the harbor.
There was an Inn, along with a Guild Office, with a Market selling different kinds of things.
"Where do we go from here Thorn"?
Grim asked nervous around the foreign strangers milling about.
Entering the stonework office, you see other adventurers waiting their turn to sign up for the next Caravan to pass by.
There was a Human playing cards with a Sea Pony at a corner table, A Saddle Arabian Mare minding her own at a bench. There was a two younger Flutter and Twinkle-eye ponies waiting around and a little Breezy perched upon the Human's shoulder.
You sign up for passage on the next caravan to the town of Cragit.
>You can talk to the others here to ask if they will accompany you with the Caravan to Cragit.
Disregard human, they're gross and their hooves are full of fingers
Approach saddle arabian, ask whre's she's going
Tell her you and you're group ar trying to find some adventurer work, ask if she knows if there's something like that at Cragit
>Your attempts at picking up some Pone, as the Arabian whacks you upon the head with every attempt.
"Hah! That's what you for perving on the innocent mare's. Anyway Casanova, I'll introduce everypony to you. The Brown Arabian with the red mane is Desert Rose. The two fillies over there are Flitter Wing them Flutter Pony, and Beryl Gleam the Gem-eyed Pony. My aquatic friend over here is Aqua Tide, and this fine gal perched on my shoulder is Chill Twister. And I'm March Delvaki, although I go by Marx for simplicity sake.
March is a your all-around Fighter of the group.
Ebony is the little Mage of the group.
Aqua is our support.
Flitter is the healer of the team.
Beryl is the mechanically gifted one of our group.
Lastly Desert Rose is really good with her Swords and Bows.
You should equip your Caravan members before departure. Wouldn't wanna fight barehooved would you?
-Single edge Sword
-Bow & Arrow
One weapon per character excluding Ebony.
Armor: Choose 7 and to who they go to.
-Small Wooden Shield
There isn't anything keeping law outside of the town's due to the distance and tribals attacking the Caravan.
You don't wanna get robbed and killed so you need weapon's to protect the Caravan against attackers.
Assuming there isn't only one of each weapon.
Bow and arrow
Bow and arrow
>With your group outfitted you were ready to go to Cragit to find new adventures and horizon's.
>Will you save your story progress mademso far?
>You may choose a different story to participate in before continuing Little Thorns Story if you want to?
A few days have passed as the Caravan travels towards her destination. The beauteous prairie graces your sigh as the pleasant smells of the flowers causes you to let out a sigh of calmness.
>What should I do to pass the time?
>A Coltshan quest with 273 replies
One flower picking later. You return to the wagon with some flowers in hoof.
>"Hey you want some flowers"?
Meteora takes the flowers albeit reluctantly as she murmurs a thanks as she takes a good long sniff of the flowers. "Thanks Thorn, that was...surprisingly not perverted of you".
>Do you ask or do anything else with Meteora?
You spend most of the day of the talking about whatever topics came to mind. You could have sworn she cracked a smile or two back there. She seems to have stopped resenting you and accepts you as a good acquaintance. As night soon falls over the land, everypony lays there heads down. She says that you are fine and she knows you aren't totally heartless. She told you about her past as the pupil of a powerful Wizard. However in my pursuit to impress Him, he released me from my apprenticeship as I ran away with my forbidden magic. I knows a lot of spells should we need one to help.along with her "Dark" magic.
Go check in with March and see how things are going.
Before leaving tell Meteora that if she ever needs something; a ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, or someone to warm her bed at night, you're always there. Be so cheesy about it it makes Chester Cheetah jealous.
"Gosh, that's so horribly cheesy, but thanks anyway for it. Maybe I'll take you up on the offer someday".
You find March at the lead wagon telling stories to some fillies about his homeland.
" Oh hey Casanova, nah we haven't had any trouble luckily. Although it will be a few more days before we reach Cragit".
>Do you say/do anything else with March, or will interact with somepony else?
Alright, now that this thing is dead, it’s time for the autopsy
There’s a lot of things that don’t add up in this quest, but I think it can be brought back to 2 core problem
First: statistics bringing down the narrative
While a CYOA is composed of both game and storytelling elements, using games tropes for describing goals, skills and characters real takes down the quality of a quest
From real believable sentient beings, your characters become a simple set of parameters, skills and numbers, and quests and event simple ways to acquire XP or gold
This discourages any attachment to any of this things, and while it’s funny for five seconds to see how many females we can rut in a day, it loses any kind of charms when it becomes a single number we see increase by one every time we do it
Same for the goals, characters popped out of the blue like MMO NPC to give us quests to participate in strife between lots of probably cool people. We would know really cool they are had we learn anything about them earlier or kill a dude we had no idea existed earlier
In the same vein, actually saying things like “achievement unlock” or showing actual numerical values of the affection of other character completely disqualify them for any kind of attachment whatsoever
I hate to break it to you, dude, but even with a 30 hour long shift, the brut amount of content you deliver is still infinitely inferior to any game I have on Steam, that mean you can only rise higher from the storytelling field
Let’s take a simple example
>"Oh, your fine, not like you were the first to do so. Alter has been helping me along and I'm pretty hoofy with a knife, or a crossbow even. This Stallion named Merc showed how to once.
What really bothers me is “And I'm not too shabby with Sleight of Hoof either" because Grimleaf is reading her own character sheet right now.
Don’t make a studious character descried himself as studious, nobody does that in real life. But people simply show what they are, Grimleaf could have gone:
>“Alter has been helping me along and I'm pretty hoofy with a knife, or a crossbow even. As for amy other talents…” She picks up a purse from her side, and when you hoof finds your side empty when you realise it’s actually yours. She gives you a snarky smirk as she tosses back your money.
Second: the chain of event
And seriously… what the fuck…
I mean, I don’t even know how to did it, but you managed to give the impression the character didn’t have a clear goal of its own before catapulting him to some strange war between clans you vaguely evocated in the OP
It just felt random and like some grand important shit was happening but it literally fell on us from nowhere when we visited our uncle’s castle to take out the bounty on our bottom bitch
And seriously, slow down
Everything we did, from apprehending local bandits to gathering an army didn’t take more than 1 or 2 posts at each step, ellipses happened almost every post
And as a result, there’s been people under our order we’ve only heard say one line, and there’s a lot of them
This type of background person doesn’t deserve a name in a good story, it’s “a knight”, or “the groom” but nothing more
And the main problem is that the event at one point started to go so fast and involve so many different camps described with so few words, that simply everyone started to feel like background characters
Just give your players some time, give them one goal at a time and let them work for it on their own for some time. Show progress, but completion must take some time.
Achieving something in a CYOA actually means nothing since the success or faildeepend only from the QM’s good will, and just telling us “yay, you did it!” at every step doesn’t make us enjoy the story more, at least not for a long time
And for god’s sake, let the players warm up to the characters. Honesty you started alright, but them there was simply so much of them at once to consider then like anything more than pawns.
Character can’t exist only as blocks of stats in a CYOA, they must feel like people, or better, like ponies