Working in Equestria

>>26058571
Every time, always the same answer.

Guard. It's the most defined skillset I have, and even a shitty grunt like me is leaps and bounds more competent than the current cadre.

>>26058571
Ponies don't have TV so I couldn't be a video engineer there, but they have movies, so cinematographer.

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>>26058571
Possibly unemployed due to the deep depression of being turned into the big stallion instead of the little mare

>>26058571
I'd want to make potions. I'd give healing potions for free and charge for everything else.

>>26058571
Repairing RB mess. I'd be rich in no time

Adventurer. Why would I waste a fantasy world on menial labor I can do in this world?

Well I'm an economist and Equestria seems to have a pseudo-feudal early-industrial society, so I guess I can make a living that way.

>>26058571
I actually fapped to this gif. Is there a gif like this with a stallion?

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>>26058571
Personal bodyguard for Princess Celestia. After the Tirek and Everfree incidents, it's evident she needs one.

The same junk I do IRL,

Go be a musician.

>>26058590
>passing up the opportunity to be a sissy stallion prostitute

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>>26058571
I am a gift shop salesman, so that probably.

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>>26058691
You know, I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I proposed to my wife.

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>>26058571
I'd open a bar, great way to make connections and there's always money to be made in alcohol

>>26058571
Work on the trains or with Time Turner.

>>26058571
Just make sure you don't...

Mouth the Cherries

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>>26059013

>>26058571
Every conventional job bores me to tears, so I'd make up my own, like a Professional Princess of the Night Best Friend.

The job involves putting up with her bullshit, keeping her from reverting into full nightmare mode again, and helping her fix how broken she is emotionally.

And then while Luna is on guard duty, use my free time to cuddle with better princess Celestia

It should work well, considering I have a friend already who sort of fits the bill, except he doesn't have magic, or wings, and he isn't a pony princess.

>>26058571
I want to be an adventurer.

>>26058571

I would do Trixie's bidding.

I think you know what I mean.

Wax the vardo, dry clean her cape, fetch smoothies with extra hay.

>>26059300
>hay smoothies
That sounds awful, and I'm actually a horse.

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>>26059306

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>>26059283
>helping her fix how broken she is emotionally
>use my free time to cuddle with better princess Celestia
There is no possible way that this plan can go awry. None whatsoever.

>>26059320
Nah it's chill. I thought this all out.

Obviously, Luna will be curious to what her best friend and best sister would be dreaming about while she's awake, so she'll eventually take a break from dream-control to peak at mine.

This is where my lust for princess poontang comes into play - Luna will come to realize that I have deep feelings for both her and her sister, and will feel comforted by the fact that my desires, although erotic and lewd, are genuine.

Afterall, what kind of best friend would hate the best friend's beloved sister?

>>26059369
BEST FRIENDS

>>26058571
Probably librarian. My autism makes me good at ordering things.

>>26059369
Yeah. That'll work. Not like Luna has ever had problems with being jealous of her sister...

You can't hide the truth in a dream, anon. She's gonna Lorena Bobbitt your ass the first time you go to sleep. Bet on that.

>>26058571
I could bake/cook. I'm decently well read and have a lot of classic literature so if I have access to that. I'm decently fit so physical labor is an option.

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Butcher.

>>26059462

Same. Aside from a few weekends as a bartender in my youth, it's the only job I've had.

We should set up a shop in Griffonstone or something.

They have library's right I can do that

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>>26058571
Personal security, mi gente.

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I would be on the cutting edge of Equestrian technology - steam engineering, power generation, and distribution.

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Being a writer, Id probably stick to that.

If i still had freetime, i dunno, build some mucle and try out for Lunas personal guard.

>>26058571
I'd use my hands to gesticulate my speech while I screamed "RIGHT ARROW RAPE!" until ponies gave me money

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ADVENTURER

>>26061273
Literal steam engineer here- I could use a job.

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>>26061414

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Private detective. Mr. Cake can pay me to spy on Mrs. Cake and I can charge for expenses!

>>26058571
I fapped to this pic like 8 times.

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>>26062113

This one is great too, IMO.

Rainbow Dash seems to have an uncanny affinity for getting into situations like these.

>>26064287
maybe she does it on purpose

>>26058571
Economist. Which is a canon field of study, which I'm good at.

I wouldn't work.

I would be somepony's pet human.

>>26058581
Probably this, gonna be weird not taking post with a rifle and using a spear instead but you can adapt I suppose

Massage guy, I don't remember what those are called.

My finners would be perfect for the massagering and for the most part, getting paid to feel-up Rarity and her kin would be nice.

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>>26066208
>not inventing the musket and letting nature take its course
A piece of wood, a metal tube, some saltpeter and phosphorous, and something to make a spark. Throw in a projectile and you got yourself a gun.

>>26066294
>phosphorous
*sulfur
hurr ima durr

Well, I'm a stock broker now. So assuming Equestria has a market I will use the tricks I've learned that are illegal now to make mad dosh

>>26066294

With the industry available, you'd really be better off just using a bow most of the time, because whatever gun you can't make won't be as effective.

Professional rapist.

>>26066294
>using a weapon that only shoots one projectile and takes a century to reload
I'll take the spear

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>>26066846
Well done, lad.

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>>26058590
I feel your pain Anon. I too want to be a pretty little mare.

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>>26061414
Did he died?

>>26067407
What do you think anon

>>26067440
I didn't see his chute fully deploy, and that looked like a sizable crater, so I'm gonna assume he at the very least broke something.

What I'd really like is some details, though. My morbid curiosity is off the charts right now.

>>26066791
>>26067174

Never mind trying to work it with hooves. Unless you're one of those cheating faggot unicorns.

Speaking of working machinery, you don't suppose the have concrete? I kinda feel like I want to introduce concrete to Equestria.

>>26061414
>>26067407
>>26067440
>>26067517
He survived, and was able to walk after three months, according to the description of this video:
https://youtu.be/jNa5dcLccS4

>>26067592
>Meanwhile in Russia
That just about sums it up, huh?

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>>26058584
So they have arcade machines and movies but neither TV nor radio?

>>26066294
That based Swiss bro is awesome, best recipe I've come across

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>>26067675

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>>26059283
>not being loyal to moon princess waifu
>going to her sister to cuddle when she's on guard duty

>>26058590
>>26067289
>Wanting to be mares
>Not wanting to be stallions with huge cocks.

>>26068204
>Being a normie

>>26068204
Have fun with that minute-man stamina, bruh. Chances are you won't notice a difference though.

>>26068204
Meh. Cocks are dumb and unwieldy. A tight, sensitive little pussy is just right.

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>>26068237

>>26068204
For humans, yes, but horses dont have high maintenance parts and get super horny now and then.

Bomp

>>26058571
I'd would work at hayburger

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>>26058571
I'd work with Vinyl Scratch, set up her equipment for her.

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>>26058590
>>26067289
have fun with that

>>26069174
Yeah, yeah, I already know. I was there for that thread, but I don't want to get fucked by stallions. I want to be in lesbians with a lovely griffoness.

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>>26058571
>Starting second semester of sophomore year in mechanical engineering
>Military enthusiast, both historic and fictional

I'd pose as an advisor and give sunbutt a few pointers in ballistics.

>>26067622
Well they appear to lack any sort of wired or wireless transmission capabilities beyond that thing Spike used to do. So it makes sense.

I'd probably just keep installing siding, windows, doors, and roofing. Ponies appear to live in homes somewhat similar to our own. I'd have to figure out how to roof with hay, and I don't see much vinyl siding on the show though, so I might need to adjust a little.

>>26061540
Anyone else still find it disturbing that Mr. Cake is in the same situation as a white guy finding out his wife fucked a black man behind his back?

AND the Mexican gardener?

Also maybe that Muslim guy that works at subway. His sperm didn't take, though.

>>26069920
>Implying they don't have weekly orgies at the Sugarcube corner, and that's the reason Pinkie ever got involved with the place.

>>26058590
>>26067289
>>26068226
>>26068242
what a load of faggots

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pony stand up comedy, pinkie set the bar pretty low so I feel like I could probably do okay

>>26070475
"So I walked into a bar... and got one heck of a bruise on my forehead!"

"My friend had a cough yesterday. Let's just say... She was a little hoarse!"

"Whaddaya call a Gryphon with no beak? Whatever his name is!"

"Remember last week when Princess Twilight fought that Tirek guy? I heard there was a lot of Discord involved!"

"How many Pegasi does it take to screw in a lightbulb? All of 'em! They'll turn it into a competition to see who screws it in the fastest! Bam, new sport!"

>>26058928
This nigga knows his stuff

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>>26070475
>>26070720
>"And another thing! This crystal castle of Princess Twiligh-, have ya SEEN this thing? I mean, WHO issued that thing a zoning permit?!"

>Studying EE
>love and like analog stuff
>could be the Tesla or Edison of this world, and get your name in the history books, and probably end up famous, wealthy, or both.
holy shit, where the fuck do I sign?
>only catch is I'd have to bring along all of my textbooks and notes.
Alternatively, just continue doing my current job, coffee.
end up working at Mr. and Mrs. Cake's place selling this fancy new bitter drink as a compliment to their sweets.

>>26071509

They have magically powered X-rays and tamed fireflies who provide lighting comparable to a lightbulb, I think you'd really have a hard time establishing a market.

>>26058571
bureaucrat
you never seen ponies with bureaucratic cutie marks. one can assume that Equestria's bureaucrats are blank flanks. Being a human, you are a perpetual blankflank, You can be good at all sorts of things, but if not on your ass it doesn't count. I don't think they have tattoos in ponyland, since they are all covered in fur, so you can't fake it. So my answer is bureaucrat

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>>26058571
Probably a personal assistant. Maybe a whore. Possibly a nature guide or something.