>"Yo, Anon! Come be my wingpony with that stallion over there. He looks hot and I wanna get laid tonight."
>>25996119
Oh no not another shitty transformation general
>>25996129
Where did you get transformation? This looks to be a cuck thread.
>>25996129
>another shitty transformation general
Were we reading the same post?
"I could just put my dick in you if you're that desperate to get laid."
>>25996129
Okay, I laughed.
Watch out for my friend Rainbow Dash, he loves pranks. Am I right? See the thing is - she didn't even notice when I swapped her vagina spore cream with toothpaste!
I'll just go get us a few. Excuse me.
I don't know Dash, something about this guy seams off
>>25996186
>saunter out of the Prancing Pony with a cute mare under one arm, and the stallion Rainbow Dash was talking to under the other
>freshmint-scented Dash swirls her cider, pursing her lips as all three fall, giggling, into a taxi carriage outside
>>25996192
This is so stupid, why did I laugh?
Y'know if I were actually a pegasus, or even a talking horse, this would be a good idea. But as it stands I'm not getting our virginities exchanged for magical STDs to some faggot at the bar.
>>25996119
I sense a murder, rape, Sudoku coming on.
>>25996387
Wouldn't it make sense that since you're a human, you wouldn't actually get STDs from ponies? Since most human diseases don't harm horses and vice versa, it would be plausible that a human wouldn't suffer from pony STDs.
>>25996428
Maybe, but keep in mind this is the same world where a pink party horse defies physics, a sunbutt and moonbut controls their respective celestial bodies, and Discord exists. You'll have to forgive me for not being cautious in fear of my dick turning into a worm or some magical shit.For the record I'm still not losing my virginity to some random faggot at the bar.
>>25996831
Hey, you can just use the practice for when you meet somepony special,
>>25996160
"Haha, no, that's ok, I'm not -THAT- desperate. Frankly I don't think anypony would be."
>>25996119
S-sure Dash. Whatever you say...
>>25996119
When are you gonna quit pretending to be straight? It's really awkward.
>>25997011
Damn, Dash...
>>25996119
>But Rainbow Dash why do you need me?You are a wing pony
>>25997011
>>25997011
that's what op's mom said before she fucked with me
>>25997011
"Oh, I see how it is."
>Anon silently sticks a paper reading "Please rape me senseless and use me as a cum dumpster!" on it.
>She doesn't notice a thing.
"You're on your own, Spectrum Trash. I'm out."
>Dash shoots a venomous look before walking off.
>She wouldn't be seen by anyone for three days.
>The next time you'd meet would be in a hospital.
>The doctor said her entire body sustained several bruises from a large gangrape.
>The poor bitch was trembling the entire visit.
>When the doctor left Anon walked up slowly to her ear and whispered
"Got more than you bargained for, didn't you, slut?"
>>25999203
>>25996119
>of beings Ivanon
>you and bluehorse are out in most holy of place, where all proud russians are of gather
>the bar.
>as you take a drink of your precious vodka bluehorse is of givings you the elbow
>"Yo, Anon! Come be my wingpony with that stallion over there. He looks hot and I wanna get laid tonight."
>you start the looking in direction of bluehorses vision, where another horse is of sit
>being the honest, he is out of bluehorse ball field team.
"is not the good idea bluehorse. perhaps different horse."
>"what? why? you not a good enough wingpony to get me some flank?"
"bluehorse, as i saying before, im not horse. also not horse of wing. how can i be the wingpony when not horse"
>you take another drinkings of real Russian fuel
>"ugh, whatever. come on anon! if you get me laid ill buy you another bottle of that stuff."
>you look from near empty bottle to all empty pocket
"ok is of good deal"
(cont?)
>>25999261
F...fuck... sauce?
>>25999429
>Continue
yesI love your wacky talking
>>25999261
>>25997011
"That's not what that mare last night said. Or that stallion Thursday. Or that other mare on Tuesday."
>"That one was a stallion, actually."
"Really?"
>"Yeah. You were so drunk you didn't notice, I think."
"Fuck. But she looked really good in that dress!"
>"That dress he was wearing to hide the fact he had a dick."
>You shrug
"Oh well, s-he was good in bed anyway. Really nice blowjob technique."
>"You told me. Rather enthusiastically, at four AM."
"Yeah, sorry about that. Again, I was shitfaced."
>"It's fine. But you owe me one."
>You pout
"You were mean to me!"
>"Oh please, Anon. You know that was a joke."
"What if I didn't?"
>"We've had sex, like, four times this week!"
"That is less than usual."
>"Well, yeah, because you were busy fucking the world's most obvious traps and I was doing 'special training' with Soarin' and Spitfire."
"Those rope burns look good on you, by the way."
>"Thank you. Now, c'mon, help me out. You owe me one for last night."
>You shrug and survey the bar
"Which one?"
>"Grey fur, white mane."
>You catch a glimpse of the stallion
>Or...
>Wait
>That snout shape is a bit suspicious
"You sure that's a dude?"
>"With that mane cut?"
"Could be a butch lesbian."
>"Well, then we don't have a problem, do we?"
"But then I don't get seconds!"
>"Yeah, that other stallion you had over didn't want to touch me either. And your lazy ass was asleep, so I had to hoof off."
"Okay, fair. Fine. How do you want me to approach this?"
>"You go and scout it out, then report back."
"So get myself yelled at by trying to flirt with a lesbian?"
>"Yeah."
"Fine, sure."Anybody interested in this bullshit?
But Dash, you already are a wing pony!
>>25999887
Both stories we've got going sound fun
>>25996119
Nah. I think I'll take him for myself. You can watch if you really want, just keep it quiet and don't make a mess in my closet.
Writefriends pls
Pestering
>>25996253
Gonna need a drawfag to draw this.
>>25996119
You're a girl, you can just throw yourself at him like the cheap little cunt slut you are
>>25999887
Now this is going in a good direction.
>>25999887
Very interested. Keep going.
>>25999253
lel stay mad cuck fag
>turns out the stallion isn't into Dash
>seduce him myself and fuck him just to spite this fucking blue cunt
>>25999429
I actually really like Russian Anon
>>25999887
More!
>>25999203
Gold.
>>25996119
Ah, it's the return of ye olde "Rainbro" thread.
>>25999429
>tfw I miss Strelnikov...
>>25999429
>Rainbow Smirks
>"You can be my wingpony any time."
>You are of placing sunglasses on face
"Bullshit, you can of beings mine, comrade."
>HIGHWAY TO THE VODKA ZONE
>>25999887
Please continue.
>>25996154
Only if you waifu Dash. Otherwise it's Rainbro.
>>25996119
"Sure, fine. But you owe me clear skies with Fluttershy tomorrow... Oh, better, rain THEN clear. Get a rainbow happening."
>All these ass mad people about being bros with Dash
Sure is nice guy in here.
>>26005625
kek
Cyka blyat for comrade anonbump for Russian anon
>>25999429
Of the sorry comrades. I was of the drink and started sleep. I continue when able.
>>26005009
>first post on mlp in 4 yrs
>know that feel brah
>>25996119
"Uh..Can't you go with someone else? I just want to drink."
>"What? No way! I don't trust these creeps. Plus, I don't even know any of them."
"Ugh, fine."
>You both walk over towards the stallion in question.
>Turns out he's out with a friend too. He doesn't look that happy. In fact he looks kinda like you do. Bored out of your mind.
>"Hey there handsome. Wanna talk for a bit?" Rainbow says while wiggling her eyebrow.
>"Sure thing doll. I'll be back in a bit Greg."
>Both the stallion and Rainbow left to 'talk' somewhere more private.
"Did she really just do that..."
>"They sure work fast." said Greg beside you.
"She always claimed to be the fastest."
>After an awkward silence Greg decides to break the ice.
>"So, what brings you to the bar?"
"Eh, I wanted to get a drink and she kinda just roped me into being her wingman.
"You?"
>"The same. Except he promised he'd help me find somepony."
"Some friends huh?"
>You two chuckle at your remark.
>"So, do you wanna go out and... you know..."
"With me? Oh no. God no. Sorry, but I don't swing that way bro."
>"Oh... Would you be my wingman then?"
>Well you got nothing better to do.
"Sure got nothing better to do."
>Walking around the bar with Greg he spots someone who intrests him, with a mare looking disinterested no less.
>Sweet easy score.
>"Hey there handsome. Are you looking to have some fun tonight?" said Greg.
>"MMMMHHMMM, indubitably.
>Wow this guy is a fag.
>"Later Anon thanks for the help."
>Greg and britfag horse disappear into the bar.
"Seriously?"
>"I know right?"
>"The names Annabelle. I'm a lesbian wanna be my wingmare?"
"Are fucking kidding?"
>And then Anon became THE go to wingman.
>He never got his drink.
>>26006573
I was amused. Nicely done, Anon. And I know that feel.
>>26006573
Anonymous Green - Ace Wingmare
>>25996119
Holy shit a talking horse
>"Hello random stallion this is my good friend Rainbow Dash. Her pussy is going to burn your dick off."
>this entire thread
>implying Anon wouldn't just pull a pic related