Let's play a game, /mlp/! Now on Easy difficulty!
If you don't know what's happening, catch up here: http://anonpone.pineapplecomputing.com/tragic/
Last time, Holiday Special got some much-needed sleep, but the following morn... um, afternoon, she was awakened to find that it had only delayed the inevitable: The Royal Guard delivered an ultimatum from Princess Celestia right to her door: Make a friend in one week, or get the fuck out. But Holiday Special has some plans of her own...
After many seconds of deliberation, Holiday Special decided to exile herself: She's going to pack up and leave on her own terms, but before she can enact her master plan, she needs two things: money, and inventory space. Applejack and the Cutie Mark Crusaders have helped on both fronts, but her search for quick work has distracted Holiday Special, who is now searching for a local colt's toy boat. He said he lost it in the river near the windmill at the northeast of town. What horrible creature could have victimized this innocent wooden plaything...?
Inventory: 1 apple
The horrible boat-snatching culprit in question reveals itself in a flurry of blue feathers and sharp, scaly talons! It is a...
...harmless bluebird. Most likely of happiness, but potentially of misery and regret as well. Holiday Special should be wary of this wily creature!
>'It's pecking at my ass... What's its deal? Does it think my Cutie Mark is a nest or something?'
>"HELP! RAPE! BIRD RAPE! BEGONE WINGED DEMON!"
Holiday Special thrashes and shakes her ass (It'd be nice if someone with actual talent drew these, huh?), stumbling and falling from the waterwheel in a frantic attempt to escape the feathered fiend. Holiday Special plummets into the river with a SPLOOSH!, clawing her way to the surface and gingerly inspecting her rump for damage.
>Butt integrity: 97%
Not perfect, but adequate (more like butt adequate right? Guys? Where are you all going?).
>'If that flying rat comes within ten feet of my precious ass again I'm going to stuff it into a throw pillow.'
But the bluebird appears to have lost interest. It merely hops along the ground, looking to and fro. Is it maybe searching for something?
Inspiration strikes Holiday Special!'
>'It must be looking for nesting materials! Toy boats are made of wood, right? Is that how this stupid puzzle is supposed to make sense? Maybe if I can catch it and bring it to what's-her-name, she'll tell me where it put the boat!'
Her plan set, Holiday whistles, getting the bird's attention. When it looks over at her, she turns and slaps her flank.
>"Hey, you! You want some of this, right? You wanna impale this flank on that long, hard pecker of yours, dontcha~?"
The bluebird is enticed! It flies back and perches on Holiday Special's flank. Every now and then it pecks at her Cutie Mark. Holiday Special winces a little, but she grins around it.
>'Perfect. Now for Phase 2...'
Holiday Special heads over to Fluttershy's cottage (I wonder how she knew where it was... Oh well who cares?) and knocks on the door.
"Hello...?" a soft-spoken yellow pegasus answers.
Holiday Special can't even hear herself ask "What the fuck?!" over the sound of nails being pounded into the other side of the door like machine gun bullets.
Holiday Special gets a sneaky, sneaky idea.
>"OKAY, I GUESS I'LL JUST LEAVE THIS POOR, IMPOVERISHED LITTLE BIRD OUTSIDE SO IT CAN FREEZE TO DEATH...!"
The bluebird squeaks in earnest disapproval.
>"Shh. It's reverse psychology."
The bluebird warbles with clarity.
After a short pause, Holiday Special hears the creak of wood. Many, many times. Behind the door she can hear the clattering of nails hitting the floor one after the other, and then the door finally opens a crack.
"A... l-little bird...?" that meek voice asks.
>"Yeah, the one perched on my ass. See it? I, uh, found him and he needed some help."
The eye in the crack swivels from Holiday to the bluebird. The supportive bluebird nods in affirmation.
"Oh, my..." the pegasus whispers, before opening the door a bit more widely. "Please, bring him in. I-I mean, would you... like to come in...?"
Well you're quite and don't talk a lot so maybe later but right now I just need this bird off my ponut so I can get this toy boat back to a kid.
This naughty birdy was using it for its nest and no one steals toys from children while holiday special is around.
Holiday Special accepts the invitation to come inside. The wimpy pegasus' cottage smells like lavendar, which is kind of nice because she expected it to smell of dog food and bird shit.
>"So, you can talk to animals or whatever, right?"
"Y-yes." Fluttershy answers, the bluebird perching on her hoof and chirping to her. "Mr. Bluebird of No Particular Emotional Allegiance here, for instance, is saying thank you for bringing him here. He needs a nest and has been having a lot of trouble finding good materials this close to winter."
>"He might have found a toy boat. Can you ask him about that?"
"Why, of course...! Mr. Bluebird, did you try to make a nest from a toy boat?"
The bluebird nods sheepishly and squeaks.
"It looks like he thought it was a premade nest." Fluttershy explains.
>"Well it's not. It belongs to a kid I'm working for. Can you tell him to give it back?"
"Oh, certainly. Go on, Mr. Bluebird, go get that toy boat, would you please? I'll help you make a proper nest when you get back."
The bluebird nods and flies out a nearby window.
"He shouldn't be long." Fluttershy says reassuringly, before turning her attention back to Holiday Special. She seemed at ease when she was talking to the bluebird, but now it looks like she's forcing a smile. The problem is that she's got the worst poker face in Equestrian history and might in fact be wetting herself now that she's realized who's standing in her living room, in strangling range no less. An awkward silence hangs in the air...
You have a terrible poker face. If you go make some tea you'll have an excuse to be out of my direct presence for a time and I'll get some tea out of it. It's a win-win for both of us.
Holiday Special shakes her head at the shuddering bird poner.
>"You're pretty bad at playing it cool, you know. You can relax. I'm not going to strangle you."
She seems to calm down a little. "Y-you're not...?"
>"Trust me, Buttersly, as far as ponies whose necks I want to wring go, you're pretty far down on the list."
"Oh...? That's a relief. I guess I just assumed otherwise from all those times you yelled at me and spraypainted obscenities on my house."
>'Heh... Good times.'
>"So, can you really help that bird out and build it a nest?"
"Oh, yes...!" she answers, sounding almost possibly like she's considering becoming slightly excited. "There are plenty of trees and bushes around here that my critter friends and I can scavenge nesting materials from, and I have plenty of birdhouses all around for the more fussy birdies that come to visit, too."
>"I noticed. Did you build all these?"
"Actually, I'm not much of a handymare..." she admits. "Most of these birdhouses come from yard sales or Thrifty's. I don't know how to build birdhouses myself."
Unforeseen IRL issues have come up and I need to go. Sorry for the abrupt cutoff; I'll be back tomorrow night.
try to sell her some more
if I remember correctly, we had a bunch of lumber in our toy shop we could use to construct them, and since we're fucking out of ponyville forever, we need to either use the lumber or just sell it all
>"You know... I don't say this often, so feel flattered; maybe I could build you some better birdhouses. You'd get some quality birdhouses that aren't shitty dumpster-diver trinkets, and it'd help me to use up the spare wood in my basement. What do you think of that, Stuttercry?"
"New birdhouses?" Fluttershy murmurs. "High-quality ones? That would be just delightful...! Oh, but I wouldn't want to burden you..."
>"What burden? Building stuff is one of the..."
Holiday Special looks at her hooves, but then she remembers she has no fingers and does her math mentally instead.
>"...Six things I actually enjoy! Come on, I insist."
Holiday Special balls and raises her hoof.
>"I. In. Sist."
"O-okay!" Fluttershy squeaks, taking a step back.
>"Spectacular! How many can I put you down for?"
"Well, I know that Mr. Bluebird needs a place to stay, and I've been meaning to replace Russell Crow's birdhouse as well... It's kind of old. And Dan Quail needs a new roof. Not to mention David Finch's bent perch, Bluejay Leno's water damage, and Unfunny Bird Pun #97's improperly-sized entry hole... So I guess 6 would be enough. Oh, but maybe I should get a spare, just to be safe... Actually, make that two spares. Just to be extra-safe."
>"So, you want 8 birdhouses, then?"
"Yes, please. I-if you wouldn't mind, that is."
>"You got it, Puddledry! I'll have them done by tomorrow!"
>'Shitshitshit why did I say that? I've already got a bunch of other stuff to do and I don't even know if I have the necessary supplies!'
Foolish festive horse. There's no such thing as spare time for the next week. We gotta bust that lightly pecked ass if we want any chance of doing this.
Now grab the boat and tell the bird thanks, but don't touch the booty again. Or else.
>"Oh hey the bird's back."
"Oh, so he is... Thank you, Mister Bluebird. Don't worry, we'll have a nice new house for you soon."
Mr. Bluebird is greatly pleased by this turn of events.
>"Great. Thanks, two-legged bird and four-legged bird. I'm outta here, smell ya later."
"O-okay, have a nice night."
On the way out, Holiday Special happily thinks of the things she loves most in life... Being around foals, making toys, and drinking are certainly three of them. What could the others be? Well, I don't want to spoil anything, but word through the grapevine is that Holiday really loves
her dad's cooking. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCwQb_Pgrw8
>TOY BOAT added to inventory
>HOLIDAY SPECIAL learned ROLE PLAY!
>...That just means she's better at identifying and pandering to what others need, which is a good skill for a savvy businessmare to have!
>(You sick fuck.)
>(You sick fuck.)
Holiday Special makes the long trek back across town to the playground. But the colt isn't there anymore...
>'Goddamn it don't kids disobey nighttime curfew anymore? I know I did! Especially when Mom accidentally locked me out of the house.'
we don't know where he lives, do we?
we'll give the boat back tomorrow, let's go make some birdhouses
and why the fuck didn't we negotiate a price with fuckershy? we need money, we can't be doing shit for free
Holiday Special is not a clever horse.
>'It's a piece of notebook paper, being held down by a rock.'
Holiday Special reads the note, which has the same writing style as the request to find the toy boat had in the first place.
>"'I have to go home for supper. I'll be here tomorrow after school again.' Signed, Goober... Urgh! Damn Daylight Savings Time!"
goddamn it, we need money, we can't just make these birdhouses for free when our time is so valuable
now we're fucked
we either don't make the birdhouses at all, or try to charge her when we deliver them
or we could try some kind of barter when we give her the birdhouses, maybe not ask for bits, but she might be thankful enough to give a favor or some help
Hey, just because we didn't negotiate a price beforehand doesn't mean we're doing it for free.
We can still refuse to give her the houses for free. We're kind of a dick like that.
No need to fret: Daylight Savings Time (also known as "an excuse for the ever-widening Prince-ass Cel-ass-tia to sleep late") is already on the list, right in between 'Background Pony #217' and 'Stupid-Face Janitor.'
As the Sun sinks behind the horizon and the temperature begins to drop, Holiday Special heads back into town once more. After much deliberation, she decides to just go home for the night. But she comes across an unexpected sight as she follows the alleys back to her place...
Since that thing appears to be hunched over, use the opportunity to observe the mystery creature's posterior. We need to know what kind of ass this thing has
and how it compares to ours
>'Oh shit, there's a crazy hobo digging through my trash! He's blocking the way home, and he doesn't have the money to buy a coffee table! What do I do?!'
Holiday Special gets as close as she feels comfortable getting. The pony (At least she GUESSES it's a pony.) rummages further, pulling out an old ice cream carton.
"Oh, wow..." Holiday Special hears the figure mutter. "Dessert... And I only had dinner yesterday...!"
Holiday Special squints at the pony's rump. To her relief, it is both smaller and narrower than her own. Also, the granny dress covering it cuts down on its attractiveness by, like, at LEAST 60%. Ew.
Holiday Special attacks with a kick to the head! The literally filthy thief crashes through the garbage cans and slides down the side of the house.
>"MAKE LIKE ME ON HEARTS AND HOOVES DAY AND BEAT IT, YOU... you... what the fuck are you, anyway?"
The fallen bum twitches. "...I probably deserved that... Story of my life..."
>HOLIDAY SPECIAL learned PUNISHMENT!
>"You're damn right you did, you little raccoon!"
Once she's done seeing red, Holiday Special approaches the fallen vagrant and interrogates him... her... it?
>"Start talking you deadbeat.... squid thing. What are you doing so far from the ocean? This is skid row, not squid row!"
"I'm not a squid." the bum answers. "If I were a marine animal, I'd probably be a filter feeder. Or maybe a barnacle. Yeah, a barnacle... That'd be nice..."
Holiday Special is unamused. She's also unsure of whether this hobo is a male or a female.
>"Quit trying to be cute! What are you doing here?"
"Looking for a place to sleep." the androgynous hobo answers, still not bothering to get up. "I was going to use the trash can, but now they're both empty... I'm not used to having so many options. It's... it's overwhelming..."
Holiday Special cocks her head.
>"...What's with you? First you said you think you deserved to get kicked in the head, then you talk all weird and like you don't even care about it."
"Oh, well, you see, I don't know if you noticed, but I'm kind of the scum of the Earth. Everypony pretends I don't even exist anyway, so I just try and make that as easy for them as I can. I rooted through your trash as quietly as I could, and I made sure not to rearrange it too much when I was digging for food. But you still heard me... I'm sorry that I made you assault me. That was really douchey of me. Totally my fault. Why don't you just ignore me and go inside, and maybe make some nice hot water to drink? I'll drag myself off your property once the feeling in one of my legs comes back, alrighty? It's the least I can do."
Well shit if every other pony dislikes this freak it can't be that bad.
Let's give it some real food and invite it inside. It can sleep on the couch until we sell it. Maybe we can get it to do some free labor afterwards.
Holiday Special is uncertain of how to proceed.
>"Who or what are you, anyway?"
"I'm a pony, of course! Just like you... except I don't have quite as many things as you have, like a house... bits... feeling in my legs and back... Nothing really important. I'm just listing the things most ponies notice first."
>"The first thing I noticed was that you look like a garbage ninja. What's with the outfit? You look like if Pozo the Clown opened a retail outlet!"
"Oh, this old thing? This is my winter ensemble, hoof-picked from the finest dumpsters in Ponyville. What do you think of it?"
>"I think my eyeballs are going to melt out of their sockets if I look directly at it for too long."
"You make a great point, but look on the bright side: You don't have to look at my face while I'm bundled up like this!"
>"Okay, first, you need to stop trying to appeal to my better nature. Go do that shit to Princess Twiggy Piggy, because it won't work on me. Second, holy shit are you depressing. What happened to you to make you such a sadsack, anyway? Are you like a comic book character? Is your superpower that you make every pony around you want to kill themselves?"
The bum is quiet for a moment before it responds: "...Is talking to you making you sad? Gosh, usually when I talk to somepony for too long they just walk away, or they start kicking me until I lose consciousness. I'm really sorry, Miss. I didn't mean to upset you. I just take my work really seriously, is all. If the best way I can do that is to be really quiet, just say so and I promise I'll stop talking."
Tell her to be quieter and then go inside.
Hobo-faggot tried, but Holiday is too jaded. Hobos have a habit of trying to fool ponies to get them to give them stuff, and Holiday needs money badly.
We already did our good deed for the month by giving away a couch.
>"Your work? Failure isn't work. Work would be carrying boards and going to get paint and..."
It is then that inspiration strikes Holiday Special like a kick to the face, through a pair of trash cans, and into the side of a house.
...Well, maybe not quite that strongly, but almost.
>'Say... Maybe this smelly bum can be of some use to me. I could use some help filling all those birdhouse orders and selling excess junk, and he's already destitute so I can pay him in peanuts. Literal peanuts, in fact! Holiday Special, you're a genius!'
>"...You take your work seriously, huh?"
"Oh, definitely. More than anything else in the world...!"
>"Would you like to earn some overtime?"
"Would I ever!?" The hobo flails its dirty little forehoofsies eagerly. "Just tell me to jump and I'll ask how high! ...Um, metaphorically speaking, I mean. My spine hasn't popped back into place yet. But that's okay: My front half will do the work of two half-ponies! Just tell me what to do and I'll give it my best shot! Or my worst, if that's what you prefer: I have a wide range of talents!"
>"I guess I should fix your back so you can actually work, instead of just lying there stinking up my lawn."
"Wow, you're really nice...!"
>"Shut up and hold still."
HOLIDAY SPECIAL used STOMP!
>letting the dirty homeless squid pony into our house
how about no
we can give directions through the window
if we need it to come inside we can order it to clean itself in the river or something
We can literally just open a window. Also you and I both know you're grasping at straws. Alright how about we put two trashbags over him. on his front half and then bottom half. your precious air will be clean and then we can put him in a tub of warm water.
But, without a good scrubbing, thats the equivalent of spraying a little bit of aerosol air freshener after someone takes a mondo stinky ass dump. It smells like someone took a shit in a basket of potpourri.
Holiday Special steps off the hobo when she hears a soft crunchy sound. The hobo groans and begins to stir.
>"There. How do you feel now?"
"Unnh..." The ponies hind legs twitch, and then it sits up. "Wow, that's the best massage I've ever had...! You have magic hooves, Miss..."
>"Don't push it. What's your name, anyway?"
"My name? Oh, I didn't introduce myself? It's Gutter Pup...! How about you? What's your name?"
>"None of your damn business."
Holiday Special is very conflicted!
>'This dirty fucker definitely needs a bath or three before I can let it in the house; I don't want him getting bum cooties all over my stuff.
>Except... When I fell in the river this afternoon, it was freezing. It'll be even colder now... Damn it, I can't get labor of questionable legality if my laborer gets hypothermia! What do I do?'
>'Oh, wait, I have a hose, don't I?'
>"Alright, stinkweed, you get those filthy clothes off. I'm going to get you cleaned up. Wait here, got it?"
"Okay..." Gutter Pup answers, reaching for the torn scarf wrapping around its head. "Um, if I freeze to death before you get back, I'm sorry in advance."
Holiday Special shakes her head as she goes inside and turns on the bathwater, being sure to empty any stray liquor bottles that may have accumulated in the bathtub since she last used it.
>'Fucking weirdo suicide horse... Who even says stuff like that? He... she... It must be doing that on purpose. Fishing for sympathy, I bet. Too bad these are empty waters.'
Once the water is warm enough, Holiday Special lets the tub fill, going out to start up the hose in the interim. Gutter Pup is right where she left him, pulling the last sock off his hoof and setting it down on the grass. Without his trash wardrobe, Holiday Special sees for the first time how short he is. And that he is indeed a male.
...Wait, a short male? With a high-pitched voice...?
Wait a second! It looks like you never set the language option before you started playing. Would you like your answer to be given in English (human years) or Equestrian (pone years)?
Sorry Satan, there's only copyrighted and usually-poor-quality video game songs in there.
Holiday Special suddenly looks nervous.
>"What did you say your name was?"
"Oh, um, it's Gutter Pup."
>"Gutter Pup, how old are you...?"
On the one hand he is an abandoned child but on the other hand he's a fucking hobo trying to appeal to emotion.
So I guess we could
go behind the house where no one can see and give him a pre-bath with the hose, then he can have a nice hot bath in our house.
Holiday Special feels a pain in her heart.
>"Oh, shit... I'm so sorry! You poor little guy, come on...! You deserve better than being sprayed down with a cold hose like a rioting zebra in Baltimare. Let's get you into that nice warm bath right now!"
Holiday Special lifts Gutter Pup right off the ground with her magic and carries him inside. His hoofsies dangle meekly. They begin to kick as he is levitated over the bathtub.
"You don't need to go to so much trouble for me...!" he tries to say. "I wasn't going to complain about free water."
But Holiday Special is having none of the colt's backtalk. She drops him into the bathtub mid-excuse and begins grooming him.
>"Where the f... Where in Equestria are your parents?"
"I don't know." Gutter Pup answers. "I grew up in an orphanage. I haven't seen my mom since I was really little, and I don't think I've ever seen my dad at all."
At first this lil kid reminded me of Napstablook from Undertale. Always apologizing for getting in your way and beating up on himself. Now he feels like from one of those abused teenagers from a madea movie.
Or, we could sculpt some wood, you are right.
What about...some kind of toy maybe?
Like a train or...
God, what did little colts play with!?
>'I suck at sewing. Lord knows how I'd get good at it, outside of some stupid sidequest or something...'
>"Close your eyes."
As Holiday Special rinses the colt's hair, she asks the obvious question:
>"Why are you roaming the streets if you come from an orphanage? Especially in December - you must be freezing!"
"Oh, no, my winter wardrobe keeps me very warm!" Gutter Pup insists between rinses. "I haven't gotten frostbite once since I finished it! Anyway, I was getting too old to stay at the orphanage; I left after I got my Cutie Mark, to make room for other foals."
Holiday Special glances at the colt's flank; there's a picture of a welcome mat on it. Even in the warm soapy water, the mat looks tattered and dirty.
>"A welcome mat Cutie Mark...?"
"Uh-huh. I got it after a pegasus at the orphanage fell on me and bruised one of my ribs. He might have gotten really hurt if I didn't break his fall... That was when I realized what my purpose in life was...!"
Holiday Special is dumbfounded.
>"Right... So, where are you from? "
"I don't know. I live here now because it's a nice town, but the orphanage was in Hollow Shades. And the ponies there said that my mom came from the north when she left me there. So... I guess you could say I came from nowhere."
Holiday Special brushes Gutter Pup's coat.
>"How long have you lived here?
"About three and a half weeks..." Gutter Pup answers. "I was going to keep going south for the winter, but I was too tired to keep going, so I decided to stay here for a bit. I think it's worked out well."
>"You're a bum! How is that 'working out well?!'
"Oh, not for me. I mean for everypony I've met here. I don't like to brag, but I think I've done a great job...!"
Holiday Special turns Gutter Pup around and scrubs his back.
>"Yeah, this 'job' of yours... What is it, exactly?"
"Making other ponies feel better about their lives. I see a lot of ponies on the streets. When I talk to them, they say things like, 'Boy, I'm glad I'm not you.' And that helps them, because when they see me, they know that no matter how bad things get for them, at least they aren't me."
Well you can't argue with that. He really does make others feel better about themselves and appreciate the things they have.
Also he's been talking to some selfish ass ponies.
Let's go to clothes horse later to get him a new outfit.
>"Well that's... nice. And I guess it's true."
>"But you should look out for yourself more. The better off you are, the more you can help."
Gutter Pup considers this. "Maybe... But I've got all the stuff I need for now: Enough food to get through the day, a place to sleep... um... my health... Yeah, I've got everything I deserve to have. And that's enough for me."
Holiday Special sighs and helps him out of the tub. To her relief, he's not stinky anymore. She brings him a towel.
>"Here, let's get you dry so you don't catch a cold..."
"Thanks, Miss. You're one of the nicest ponies I've met since I moved here."
Great, we have a clean cheap worker now.
Let's get back to work.
Unless this pour little thing need some snack?
I mean, he didn't eat today, he will surely work better if he is healthy, no?
Thank you again for the entertainment Inept (and Anons, obviously), this was a very pleasant time !
Aww I kinda want to take the little guy in. Since we're moving anyway and he's a wandering bum maybe we can take him on our travels. We'll just need a bit more money for expenses.
Having a sidekick wouldn't be too bad.
Holiday Special is getting kind of spooked by Gutter Pup's resemblance to a spoopy ghost.
>"I, uh... You dry off. I'll be right back."
Holiday Special leaves, her poor heart pounding. As she tries to calm down, she remembers she left her liquor on the kitchen table. Quickly, she goes and puts it back where it belongs, lest Gutter Pup see it and become as corrupt and dead inside as Holiday herself.
Holiday Special returns to Gutter Pup, who is no longer either wet or spooky. Instead, he is now floofy.
>"You must be hungry. Come on, I'll get you a snack."
Gutter Pup shakes his head. "I couldn't do that... You've already treated me like royalty. I should do something nice for you in return, like... getting YOU a snack! It's the least a dirty freeloader like me could do...!"
>"You're getting a snack and that's final. Now come on."
Holiday Special drags him to the kitchen and sits him at the table. Her mood has gone a bit sour from hearing that she of all ponies has somehow been nicer to the poor colt than most other ponies in town. If that's the case, she might need to teach a few Ponyvilleans some etiquette...
>"So, tell me more about the ponies you've met around here. It sounds like some of them haven't been very nice to you."
"Oh, no, they've been just fine. One old donkey accidentally stepped on me, and a couple of fillies accidentally threw rocks at me, but other than them I've been treated very well here."
Holiday Special stops.
>"A couple of fillies...?"
"Uh-huh. One was gray with glasses, and the other was pink with a little crown."
>'Those little cunts.'
Holiday Special tries to ignore her fillycidal thoughts and focus on getting a snack.
>'There's a box of donuts and a bag of chips in the cupboard, and there's some pudding cups in the fridge.'
I would give him the donuts because of the bread and sugar it has. Unless we have a guest room he's going to be sleeping in our bed tonight.
Tell him that he can't leave the house though without you knowing.
we're taking in a child anon, this is different.
Besides I think hes one of those im friends with everyone types so im not sure it would count.
Tell him we appreciate his initiative so if he really wants to help out he can help us build our birdhouses and with some errands we have to take care of tomorrow.
how can we leave forever if we have friends?
I guess it's time to kick him to the curb then
jk pls don't do that QM
>giving up our bed
why would we do that?
he'd be super thankful just to sleep on the carpeting, he doesn't need the bed
Holiday Special brings the hungry hungry horsey a pudding cup and a spoon.
>"Here, kiddo. How about some nice yummy butterscotch pudding?"
"Pudding?" Gutter Pup says excitedly. "Wow, that's like a dessert one of the princesses would eat...! Thank you so much, Miss!"
Holiday Special waves her hoof.
>"Forget about it... Anyway, you said before that you should do something nice for me. I've got an idea about that: How'd you like a job?"
Gutter Pup looks up in a mix of eagerness and confusion (and with a pudding cup stuck on his boopsnoot). "Rr jrrmf?" He grunts and bats the cup off his muzzle. "Sorry. A job? After all you've done for me, how can I say no...?! Just tell me what you need me to do and I'll get it done, lickety-split!"
We just need him to get stuff for use while we're making birdhouses and help us with the deliveries. Perhaps while we're working we can teach him some stuff too. Give him a trade skill.
>"What sort of skills do you have?"
"Oh, I have lots of unique skills: I can go for six days without food, and I can dislocate 14 of my bones on-command, and..."
>"Not what I meant. Also, 14 bones? Ew. Just ew. I mean, can you build things?"
"Well, I'm good at finding uses for stuff. And decorating... I even put a second floor on a cardboard box once...!"
>"Okay, that's something. We're making progress. Let's see... Can you read?"
"Yeah, I learned how at the orphanage. I can also do fourth grade math!" Gutter Pup says proudly.
>'I'd love to see this kid make a resume...'
>"Can you help me with making deliveries and running errands, buying supplies, stuff like that?"
"Sure I can... oh, but... I don't have many bits to buy things with." Gutter Pup roots around in his inventory, before producing 2 bits, a paper clip, and an acorn. He pushes them forward on the table. "What can I buy for you with these?"
Don't worry little buy we'll be playing for our own supplies we just need you to get them. But first we need to see what we have on hand.
Show him our workshop, I bet it will blow his mind.
Holiday Special puts a hoof to the bridge of her muzzle (Horses have those, right?).
>"No, kiddo, I mean I'll provide the money and you go buy what I need and bring it back here. Got it?"
"Oh. Um, well, I don't know if I'd feel okay about taking your money like that..."
>"You're not taking my money. You're buying things for me that I'd have bought myself anyway. What's the problem?"
Gutter Pup glances down and to the side. "There's no problem... I can do that, sure. I'll bring the change back as quick as I can afterwards. With interest."
>"Okay, whatever makes you feel better."
"So... What should I go get for you?"
>"Nothing now. It's late, and the stores are all probably closed. Besides, you'll freeze if you go out in this weather with your hair still wet."
"It wouldn't be the first time, honestly..."
>"Either way, you can't shop when the shop is closed. And I need to make up lists of what I have compared to what I need first anyway.
"Oh, alright then... So, if I'm not going to go to the store yet, what would you like me to do for you now?"
I am actually a little worried about giving him our money and just sending him off
he's such a pushover it's possible he'd give up the money before he purchased what we needed simply because someone asked him for it
we need to give this kid some spine before we give him responsibilities.
>"Why don't you help me with my new order?"
Holiday Special gets up from the table and opens the door behind her, beckoning for Gutter Pup to follow her.
>"Come here. I'll show you where I work."
Curious, the colt follows Holiday Special downstairs, to her workshop. His eyes widen and glint when they see the colorful decorations, random toys, and power tools lining the walls.
"Wow...! Look at all this... What do you do with it all?"
Holiday Special gestures to the tools.
>"I use these..."
She gestures to the toys.
>"...To make THESE!"
"You make toys...? That's so cool...! What's that one on the desk?"
>"This is a toy train. I haven't finished it yet, but trust me: When it's done, it's going to be fuckin' SICK! ...I mean, it'll be... neato?"
Gutter Pup chuckles a bit. "Heh heh... Who are you making it for? And what about the other ones on the shelves?"