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>"Every opponent i faced in my sisters...
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You are currently reading a thread in /mlp/ - My Little Pony

Thread replies: 489
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>"Every opponent i faced in my sisters banishment i vanquished with a single blow, no matter what they did they couldn't give any more than a scuff."
>"You're the first one to make me bleed in quite a long time Anon."
Seriously don't be a pusscake, the chili wasn't that hot.
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>Every stallion she's been with hasn't had a big enough cock for her even to feel it
>By the time you get a chance at her, she's practically still a virgin
I need some over dramatic Celestia greentext
>Celestia takes another snort into her bowl, the white powder now lining between her nostrils.
>You quickly unfurl a photo of you against a plywood, and you hide behind it.
>She charges, her horn glowing as she launches the dead tree remnants up into the ceiling, and they fall down, your feet not failing you as you outrun your drugged acquaintance.
>Slam Jam Initiated
>With that, you have Slam of The North Star blasting on your bluetooth speaker as Celly picks up the wooden adversary with your face, her magic gripping it tightly as you watch her pummel it relentlessly into the ground,
>"I'LL SLAM YOU TO THE PAVEMENT SHA- I MEAN ANON!" She just keeps pummeling.
>And Pummeling.
>And pretty soon, as the wood starts to shard into pieces, you take a step out of the royal chambers,
>Exit Stage Right,
>Warp Factor Fuck.
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I'm trying to watch the fuckin game, quit trippin over ma feet and get me anaotha beer.

Saitama in equestria greentext when?
>Saitama in Equestria
There you go.
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Fukin' fagot
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Thanks Technicolor cock sock.
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What did you think I was going to do when you made me your royal sparring partner?
You act like you've never seen me fight before.
You know, you're not really all that tough, Sunbutt.
Your sister would put up twice the fight you could.
>"Is that a challenge, Anonymous?"
>"It is settled. We will meet in the arena this Sunday night."
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Anon V Luna ending in Sexual Tension.
Make Dong Cena proud.
Trips compel me, as does boredom.

>You take a deep breath as Celestia takes a minuscule nibble off of a spoonful of your famous three-bean chili.
>For the last week, you'd racked your mind, trying to devise some culinary devilry that would satisfy her frighteningly sensitive taste buds, and today you were at the end of your rope.
>After three attempts and five hours in the kitchen, you had produced your greatest masterpiece.
>Silently, Celestia chews through the tomatoes and bell peppers, and then your face falls as her eyes bulge and begin to water.
>The chili powder had settled in.
>She immediately lifts a glass of milk to her lips, taking a long gulp and panting through her nose.
>Rather than endure her five minute spice panic, you raise from your chair and step over to her, grabbing her by the chin.
>Before she can get another sip of milk, your own mouth meets with hers, your tongue penetrating through the kiss in the most practiced manner possible.
>Almost immediately, your tongues meet and you begin tracing yours around her own in a spiral pattern, removing the spice from her taste buds manually.
>Slowly, Celestia calms down and begins to sink into the kiss as the spice leaves her mouth, her panicked expression becoming a close-eyed smile as you withdraw your tongue, slowly backing away.
>"Better. Thank you, Anon, for everything."
>Even with your culinary failure, you can't help but smile a bit.
>Sometimes, it's worth it to fail.
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>bell peppers
>in chili
Please consider consulting with a mental health specialist.
Courage the Cowardly Dog.

What a creepy little show.
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>Not adding glorious sweetness to accent the flavors of spice.
Git gud
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He doesn't put bell peppers in chili.

Also unf.

>Day WanPan in Equestria.
>It had barely occurred to you this morning that when you got out of bed, you weren't in your usual apartment.
>In fact, it barely even occurred to you that you didn't have the usual metallic knocking on your door seeking to learn more about your non-existant wisdom.
>As per usual, you had simply gotten up, grabbed the toothbrush that happened to be sitting on the counter and went through your daily routine.
>It wasn't your tooth brush of course.
>You hadn't the slightest idea where your toothbrush was or where your apartment was.
>Or where your cyborg leech was.
>You simply pondered the abnormal coloring of the walls around you.
>That particular spot on the ceiling was made of an extra shiny blue crystalline material.
>You saw on tv once that crystals are metals that are processed under age and pressure and contain many minerals in them.
>From that you could tell that this place couldn't be a man-made formation because you didn't know how they could build a house out of this stuff.
>Maybe it was carved into?
>But you passed by a window and you're pretty sure you were at least 50 feet up.
>So there goes your theory about it being natural.
>Your morning contemplations are some of your favorite times of the day, to be honest.
>However, it soon occurs to you, as thistle on the brush run along your calcium deposits, that you're missing a key element.
>Something that is on the tip of your mind but-
>You spittake a dent in the wall before dropping everything and turning.
>You don't even open the bathroom door.
>There's now just a you shaped hole sitting in it.
>And your pace embedded your footprints all down the hallway back to your room.
>Your room which was not your room and neither did it have your tv.
>Or your Manga.
"Wait a sec! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY TV?!"
>This destructive revelation hits you harder than your own fist as the errors of ignoring your transport to this new world finally dawn on you.
"Holy shit! Where's my shit?!"
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keep going

>Your nigh incoherent screams of terror soon reach what you assume to be the denizen of this establishment.
>And the room soon became a mixed bag of rabid shouts of horror as you point around the room, thinking you're babbling about your tv.
>You aren't sure but you'd like to think the winged purple unicorn was screaming back trying to communicate with you.
>So when her horn started to glow brightly you simple assumed she was trying to tell you something.
>Maybe she was trying to give you your tv?
>That was before the whole wall behind you was completely obliterated.
>Except one small part that resembled your rounded head and torso.
>You had to admit, that did make you shut your trap.
>That or the gust of chilled wind that came with your clothes being all but shreds.
>As a stray piece of debris stuck up from the ground in front of your waist, you realized that you were attacked.
>Huh, took you a little bit to understand that.
"Ah...sorry. Did I wake you?"
>The little equine 'thing' just stared back with the most confused gaze you think you've seen, frozen completely.
>You waved a hand in front of her face trying to catch her attention again, only to find her paralyzed.
>Thoughts begin to fill your head at what happened, as you hope you didn't somehow kill your first contact.
"Um...hello? Are you okay?"
>She remained frozen, and you simply stayed the same.
>Maybe she's just really tired and dozed off.
>With her eyes open though? You doubt that.
>Was she like G*nos and just ran out of power?
>Did they have that kind of technology here?
>Following her gaze you realize that the blast put a big hole in the clouds behind you and seems to have burned a mountain off in the distance.
>Tough little thing, huh?
>Come to think of it, it's pretty breezy in here...
"Oh shit, my clothes! I don't have any spares!"
>It was just now occurring to you that you were naked pretty much in public.
>Clothes were expensive.
"Oh my god! There's a horse in my house!!"
kinda ooc for twibutt to just shoot him with all she's got, interesting anyway
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>Mfw this man doesn't get the joke despite my attempts


>Minutes later the 'pony', as she insisted on being called, had managed to finally return to the land of the living.
>It took several minutes of breathing exercises and a moment of existential contemplation which you didn't understand the half of.
>But she seems to have properly calmed down and even offered you a towel to wear for the moment since your clothes were out of commission.
>Rest easy, sweat pants.
>"Alright, okay, we're fine now. I'm good! I'm good. Let me introduce myself!"
>She cleared her throat, smiling peacefully and standing, you think, poised and regally.
>Her voice was admittedly rather soothing at the right tone.
>"I am Twilight Sparkle, Alicorn Princess of Friendship and appointed disciple of Princess Celestia! I undergo the rightful task of spreading friendship and peace across the land, and helping everypony understand the power of a good friend!"
>You could see the visible glow of her 'righteous Aura' at her vocal announcement, and her grin simply screamed 'Subtle insert for admiration'.
>Of which you missed entirely.
"Cool. I'm Saitama. I'm a hero for fun and profit. Like a hobby."
>She seemed to be dutifully holding her pose as if she were still expecting something.
>Though from the twitch in her form it was more like she was just confused.
>Another minute and she slowly lowered her posture and you could hear a faint whimper of disappointment.
>Silly pony.
>As she opened her eyes, she hid away the tinge of sadness and simply proceeded with the introduction.
>"It's n-nice to meet you, Saitama! That's a bit of a strange name around here, but first and foremost it is my honor to welcome you to our humble land of Equestria!"
>Her hoof pointed out the giant hole in the wall to the world around you.
>Admittedly the view was quite stunning.
>The sun in the distance, the gleaming colors.
>So pretty...
>So medieval...
>So without your TV.
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Ya know I haven't seen "one-punch man" but now I want to. Good show my good fag.
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You are REALLY going to need to prepare your anus. I'm not even kidding.


>Come to think of it, now that you were here, it was entirely plausible that you would once again be a faceless entity to the peopl-...ponies, living here.
>Did they even have a hero association?
>Surely they had villains and needed people to take care of those villains, right?
>You couldn't feasibly imagine a world where that wasn't the norm.
>How else were you going to get pai-
>How else could you save the innocent lives of those poor citizens?
>But more importantly...
"Miss Twilight...you don't happen to have a Manga shop here, would you?"
>With a quizzical tilt of her head you assume the worst, but her words were like heavenly salvation raining from the skies.
>"You mean a Mane-ga shop? Well, yeah, I-i mean not that I go there a lot. But it's totally okay if you do! Haha! I mean everypony has their own tastes and..."
>Like the fade-out of a radio broadcast, her eyes turn downwards beneath her bangs and her face flushes a bright shade through her fur.
>Poor thing still has her decency.
"That's a relief, not all hope is lost. Ah, but another question...does Equestria have heroes?"
>Her eyes slowly moved along the ground in confusion before lifting her head properly, as if she didn't understand the question.
>"What do you mean by 'heroes'? I mean yeah, we have heroes in that when a bad guy shows up, me and my friends usually team up and use the elements of harmony to destroy all darkness, save the land, usually convert the bad guy- this and that- blah blah-"
>This is where you did what you usually do and stop caring about the miscellaneous details.
>You were too busy with one of life's greatest concerns.
>How were you going to pay the rent?
>Where would you work?
>You didn't have much job experience outside of being a hero.
>You doubt they paid for marathoning manga here.
>The challenge you feared might come to pass...
>Getting a job.

>"The elements themselves were a miracle of magic found by Princess Celestia from the tree of harmony, depicted he-"
>That pony has charts out now.
>From where, you haven't the slightest clue.
>But your focus was on a matter most grave and staring intensely out into the sunset, with your sharp features shadowed by the light, you speak.
>Your tone is that of a wandering vagrant, lost without a purpose, with too much on his shoulders.
>She stops, gazing at your toned form bearing but a towel on your hips.
"Be quiet. I'm contemplating the greatest challenge I could ever dream of. Friendship won't matter..."
>The look in her eyes could only be summed up to an ant staring into the abyss, fearing that the light would soon become a shadow.

>Be twilight.
>Being of immense power...
>And you were scared.
>"A...a challenge?"
>Could it be...?
>Something worse than discord, perhaps? Worse than Chrysallis?
>...Worse than Tirek?
>What kind of unspeakable horrors comes from a world with a creature so powerful?
>Indomitable to your overwhelming magic.
>The magic of the Gods.
>Could it be that he realizes he's alone now, in this world?
>That something followed him and he is without his fellow warriors?
>Truly it was the beginning of another quest, and Twilight Sparkle, Princess of friendship, was prepared to challenge whatever it wa-
"I have to get a job."
>A jo-
>His voice echoed deeply, fist clenching with the force of kings.
"It's true. To earn my keep and find a home. To defeat...the rent."
>"Y-...you know that I have extra rooms in my castle, right? And I'm royalty, so you can stay without having to pay rent.
>...he stood there.
>He spoke softly at first, his shoulders relaxing.
>Before slowly, he turned his head, taking a righteous step towards the purple Princess with an inspiring smile, and the sharpest gaze you could dream of.
"Friendship truly is the greatest ally, Twilight."
Sorry, I didn't know I'd walked into the shitty chili thread.
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>"Friendship truly is the greatest ally, Twilight."
you are doing god's work anon

>Tirek reappears
>Enslaves everyone and this time also defeats Twilight
>Tirek gets cocky and starts monologuing
>Saitama Appears

You know well what happens next.

You are doing a good job anon.
Keep it going friend
I don't know who he is, sadly.

>You didn't have much job experience outside of being a hero

Just go to the rock farm and destroy rock. They even have they own tatsumaki(without psychic powers), limestone.

Being a bit of a method actor helps with writing, desu senpai.
Also those trips. Probably gonna put that in somewhere now, don't worry.

Who 'who' is? Tirek? Saitama? Me?


>Be the Caped Baldy once again.
>A name you will never share with this world.
>And a name that reminds you that you're still naked.
"The power within the bonds of Friendship can overcome any challenge, Twilight. Never forget that."
>Or in your speak; I swear I'll pay you back somehow for letting me stay here, I just can't pay rent.
>Nor would you anyways.
>You had a strict budget of Manga, Noodles, and repairs for clothing.
>None of which you were budgeted for right now.
"To think our paths of righteousness would cross in such mysterious ways. Fate had something to show us, I know it. Together we wil-"
>"Do you want me to kick you out?"
>You were on your knees with your head bowed before the light could even reach you.
"I'm sorry, Ma'am..."
>The purple mare was visibly distraught by your show of self so far.
>In her head she was having a quandry of her own.
>She let out an exasperated sigh, clearly not having expected THIS to wake up IN HER HOME.
>"It's never a scholar from another world, is it? Anyways...Listen, Saitama, I am the princess of Friendship. You don't have to silently beg me for mercy, okay? You're free to stay as you wish. I can tell you're not a bad guy, though we will have to work on the job issue."
>"But trust me, I'll help you, I swear. Firstly though, we'll need to go through some evaluations."
>Standing up slowly, you feel almost a little nervous as she begins to eye you up and down.
>"I mean, a being from another world, and clearly one in good fitness! I'm sure there's so much to hear from you, and only good things can come from properly understanding each other!"
>Aww, well now you were just blushing, smiling dopishly at being considered so unique.
>"I've seen creatures with body types like yours before, but none without any hair!"

Now we just need the monster association to be in here.

btw if saitama is gunna pummel any bad dudes, make sure you dont omit any grisly details that befits the manga bro.
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>living life without bell peppers in your chili.

>Unbeknowest to you, of course, the level of raw power in your lungs being exerted touched the essence of a mare who rested in the shadows of her room, away from the light of day.
>A shout of anger and fury filled her mind, and for but a moment there was something beyond terrifying in her mind.
>More than a dream...
>A nightmare.

>Be Saitama.
>Be fucking pissed.
>Be not hiding it very well.
>It started with grinding your teeth in an attempt to calm yourself.
>It ended so far from that.
>You almost got lost in your fit of misery and envy.
"There's nothing wrong with being BAAAAAAALD!"
>The force behind your lungs was enough to throw the Princess into the hallway, where she proceeded to pick herself up, smile sheepishly and dash away while yelling back.
>"I'll show you to my friends later so you can meet everyone! Meetmedownstairswhenyou'refeelingbetterhaveanicestay!"
>You would've given chase to her to give her a proper piece of your mind.
>But another wind blowing by got you to shiver from the cold, a sneeze escaping your nose.
>You must've gotten lost in your anger but as clouds and rain began to dawn on the land it was exponentially colder.
>And you were still naked.
>Maybe you should find another room to stay in.
>Seeing as the day was merely beginning to start, you figured you could at least finish your morning routine.
>Thankfully the door to the bathroom was 'exactly' your size.
>Wonder how that happened...
>Not like anyone was gonna walk in on you anyways, it seemed like only Twilight lived here.
>Shit, Shower, Sh-...
>You spent a good 20 minutes cooling off in the warm water of the shower, though the place was a little small for you, so the image of you sitting with your knees pulled up to your chest in the tub would have to do.
>Soon you were properly cleaned and the ashes of your clothing were ridden from your body.
>"Hey Twilight, why is there a hole in the bathroom do-"
Saitama vs Cranky. Baldy fight.
Make it happen.
Follow it with Saitama vs Discord.
The one thing he can't punch away.
I remember when Boros said he would inevitably win because he could regenerate from anything. When Garou said he couldn't be touched.

Then Saitama punched them.


>There was now a little lizard...thing standing on the otherside of the door.
>Thankfully he was small enough that the hole in the door left a spire up the center of your waist line.
>That would've been innapropriate.
>Slowly, and unassumingly, strapping your towel around your waist, you actually bother to open the door.
>And it snaps off it's hinges in your hand.
>To which you simply lean it up against the wall, face like stone.
"...Tell Twilight to take it out of my rent."
>The little guy just stands there, even as you walk right by him and out to the hallway towards the stairs.
>Definitely towards the stairs.
>You think this is the way to the stairs.
>You'll find it soon, don't worry.

>Be Purple Smart.
>It has been 2 hours now and Saitama is still upstairs.
>You've heard of needing time, but this was ridiculous.
>Could his species just be very emotional?
>Or maybe he forgot...
>Whatever it was, you had plans, and if he wanted to stay in today you guess that was fine, too.
>You suppose you can just let Spike see him later when he stops by.
>Writing a quick note to spike about your visitor, and not to be alarmed, you make your way to the door and head out to meet up with your friends.
>It was customary to have a meeting in your castle once in a while to discuss everyone's recent findings, their lessons, etc.
>And to go over the possibilities that could invade Equestria.
>You loved those times, you always prepared charts about the statistical odds and what comprehensible disaster could happen next.
>Better safe than sorry!
>Saitama can probably take care of himself, he seems reasonable.

>Meanwhile in the castle...
"Twiliiiiight! Anybodyyyy! Help me...I'm so lost..."

>Yeah, he'll be fine.
>Oh, you should let Rarity know he'll need a suit.
I love you anon.
Toasting in ebic bread
That's based on the assumption that he'd be able to hit Discord. Even Garou was no Chaos Lord.
please don't start a powerlevel discussion, the ones on /a/ were bad enough
Shhh, you'll have fun, don't worry. You'll see.


>Speaking of whom, you see Rarity talking with Rainbow, who must have just got done bringing it the clouds for the shower today.
>They seem to be having a pleasant conversation, Rainbow not even bothered by the sprinkle.
>Rarity on the other hand has a coat and scarf, her umbrella, and of course boots.
>In her words; "If it isn't in a bath, Darling, it is only pure and vile mud."
>Being so afraid of an aqueous mineral compound, hah.
>Silly pony.
"Hey girls! I was just about to come get you!"
>Looking over, the two grin and approach, though Rarity fell behind a bit when Dash's landing nearly splashed her.
>"There you are, egghead! I was worried you'd be couped up in your castle again today. Where were you, anyways?"
>Rarity gently wiped herself clean of any remains of the ground whilst approaching in her dainty manner.
"Something, um...'unexpected' came my way but don't worry, it's fine. It was just a visitor that I'm sure you girls will meet in no time."
>Rarity herself was quick to speak up at the mention of a new face.
>"Oh my, a newcomer? Careful what you tell Pinkie, she might just feel the need to throw her-"
>Suddenly ow your ears.
>Defcon. Defcon.
>Heart rate returning to normal.
"Hiiii, Pinkie, yeah...um, he's a bit different. I was actually going to ask Rarity here if she'd be willing to meet him later because he doesn't have any good clothing right now. A bit of a travelling misadventure."
>The pink pony bounced practically on air out of excitement meeting someone new, as was customary around here.
>She could be so random.
>"Oh! Why, Darling, you needn't say any more! Once I meet him I'll be sure to schedule something right away. If I may ask, what's his name?"
"Oh, don't worry, I think he'd like to tell you himself. He has a bit of an introduction, but he's a nice guy! He's also not a pony, just putting that out there."
Keep doing it, its great
Call me a heretic, but would ponies be the best for this story? Or do humanized/anthro seem fitting? I can't tell (or care), but by default I'm using regular ponies.

>As if this meeting were fated by some power, you hear a quiet, timid voice pipe up from the sidelines and find Fluttershy approaching.
>"O-oh, did I hear about a new animal? Oh! Please tell me more, Twilight. If he isn't a pony, then what is he?"
>You couldn't help but smile in a friendly manner, thinking back on how Fluttershy used to be so averse to meeting anypony, pony or otherwise.
>The girl has grown so much.
>You all have, really.
>You've all learned and excelled, and friendship brought you all to newer heights than any of you could have ever imagined.
>"What's all this about sum new feller in the neighborhood?"
>Oh, how plot convenient, it's a pony named AppleJack.
>Surely she was here because she remembered the meeting at the castle, since you had all been making your way to said place.
"How nice of you to join us, AppleJack! Don't worry, it's simple really, he's in the castle. Once we're inside you can all see him, I know you came here for the friendship meeting, right?"
>Everything and everypony was right on schedule, as you expected!
>"Say what now? Oh, no, I forgot all about that. I was coming because I was following -That-."
>AppleJack pointed with her hoof to the skies which you followed curiously.
>What could have drawn her other than an important du- Oh.
>That...thing barreling towards you all.
>I see...
>Oh wait no thAT'S BAD-
>You and the girls sprinted out of the path of this oncoming projectile which was distorting the air around it with it's speed.
>You were prepped with a defensive shield at the oncoming impact, which tore an immense crater into the ground before your castle.
>Debris being shot up into the air.
>The rain hovered, as if in slow motion, above the impact.
>And in the wreckage was...
>"Greetings, our fellow Royalty!"
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>As if nothing fucking happened, you see Luna gleefuly prancing closer, hooves clacking on the occasional stone upturned from the earth.
>Her landing cleared the rain above her, she was still quite dry.
>Your mane dripped with soakage.
"Ah...hey, Luna...what brings you here?"
>You really hoped it was something important.
>Craters didn't make good lawn ornaments.
>Luna herself thankfully seemed to take on a rather serious expression however.
>"Ah, right, apologies. We are just socially awkward, and will express the correct opening to our entrance. *ahem*"
>Oh Celestia no no NO!
>"GREETINGS! Twilight, our companion in Equestrian defense, we come to you with a vision of terrible power, a force that plagues Ponyville with fury! We sensed it just this morning."
>Poor...poor Rarity.
>She wasn't prepared for the canterlot voice.
>The delicate mare was shivering with her fur matted beneath rain and mud and dust.
>She looked so miserable...
"Princess...if I may inquire, quietly, what is this matter of utmost urgency that should not be heard by as many ponies as physically possible?
>When you need to get told, you get told.
>Luna scrunched her muzzle in embarrassment, realizing that many ponies in the street were now wide awake and approaching the scene.
>"Eheh...um...but it's important..."
>You sigh in a fit of frustration with the incompetence you've been putting up with so far but let it slide.
>She was adjusting.
"Okay, well...we're all here, might as well hear you out. Would you like to come in with us and talk it over?"
>It would be a good time to discuss a matter of great importance while having the Friendship meeting.
>Perhaps this was just more good luck!
>"N-neigh! 'Tis not the time, nor the place! It is most urgent, and worst of all, you must not sense it, but the power came from WITHIN your castle!"
"That was probably me blasting a hole in my wall, Princess...I have a visitor and he surprised m-"
>"Not that, silly pony! Much worse..."

>Well, I mean she can't mean...
>Luna seemed to be taken aback, surprised that you knew the name of this 'source'.
>"You know of it? Don't tell us, you're 'harboring' this entity?"
>It's just a naked, hairless creature.
>It's obviously Sapient, and though it looks strong you never felt threatened.
"Luna, I think you're mis-understanding. Look, come inside and I'll introduce you! Though I don't know where he is right now. I guess he's still in his room..."
>"You ARE harboring it! Twilight, listen to us, what we felt is something you don't want to mess with! This Saitama, whoever he is...wait..."
"Wait for wha-"
>A hoof quickly plunged against your muzzle, silencing you with a shush, your friends looking at each other very worriedly, as were you.
>"Listen...do you hear it...?"
>You stopped for a moment, trying to hear past the rain, trying to find whatever it was that Luna was sensing.
>Hang on...
>There was something there.
>It was like a faint pressure building tension.
>There was a rumbling.
>You could feel it coming from...
>Your castle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QImBolnTVH8 You might want this.
>Then you heard it...
>"Who designed this stupid CASTLEEEEEE!"
>The wall of your castle shattered as a giant hole seemingly 'appeared' out of nowhere, exploding in a shower of crystal sparkles.
>And there flying through the hole...
>Buck Naked...
>His towel flowing in the wind...
>Fist outheld with a look of desparation and anger...
>Was Saitama flying through the air.
>Screaming his head off while chunks of your home flew straight at Luna.
>Excuse me, they flew straight into Luna.
>Who was no longer there.
>Instead, there only stood the panting form of your new house mate who almost looked about ready to shout again.
>That is until he stood up and looked around, realizing he was finally outside.
>"...Ah, it's Raining. Woops."
You'll bleed even more hen you gave birth to our children, my dear.
Maximum heresy. Continue with full pone.

>Be a professional hero.
>Having just escaped his worst fear; Endless hallways.
>Currently you reside in the free outdoors.
>With Ponies everywhere, and I mean everywhere, staring at you.
>Turning around, you notice that Twilight is standing in front of her castle with a group of other colorful ponies.
>It was almost like they were made of candy.
>Not that you like sweet things too much.
>Your towel caught on a piece of outsticking stone as you turned fully to face them, seeing the enormous hole you just plowed into Twilight's castle.
>And you grinned.
>You dusted yourself and your hands off and smiled.
"That's better, now you can actually see where you're going in there! Twilight, sorry about the hole, I don't know how crystal houses work so if it's gonna be expensive can we talk it out first?"
>...they just stared.
>All in absolute shock.
>A white one with purple hair, covered in mud.
>A pink one with a mane as flat as paper.
>A yellow one trembling behind one of her friends, an orange one with her hat just dangling off her ear.
>And a blue one with a bright rainbow mane.
>Oh, and wings.
>Ah, maybe they could fly?
>Could you ride a flying pony?!
>This place was magical...
"What are you all staring at?"
>Twilight very slowly shook as she raised her hoof at you...or wait.
>Behind you?
>Turning revealed only...
"Oh, another po-"
>The sound of an immense force colliding with your face marks the meeting between this new pony's hoof and you.
>The ground below cracks and gives way as you're buried up to your shins from the attack.
>The wizard is undeterred.
>As she gazes down at you with contempt in her eyes, several cuts along her cheeks and neck, you return the stare with one implying dangerous territory.
>Minutes seem to pass before the gust of the attack settles and you're left, unflinching, with her hoof against your shoulder.
>It takes her a long time to apparently notice she isn't hurting you.
>At all.

"Cool. Cuddle now?"

>In that moment, her eyes flash with shock and panic as she pulls away, spreading her wings and making great effort to get away to a safe distance.
>She flies fully overhead and lands near Twilight and her entourage, hooves braced hard enough to shake the ground faintly.
>Silly ponies.
"I'm going to assume that's just how you greet people in this world."
>Your voice is soft enough, and you hope she senses the plea for peace in this instance.
>It doesn't look like it's making it through.
>"Silence! We don't know what you are, but you will not put our ponies in danger!"
>Quickly raising your hands, you wave passive in front of you to signal that she's wrong.
"Wait, wait, no. You've got it wrong, I'm just staying here to-"
>She doesn't give you the time to explain yourself and simply charges up her horn with another glow like Twilight had.
>"I said silence, cur! Taste the fury of millenia built throughout my form! We shall not allow you to run rampant, now fall! Midnight Mirage; Nap time Cannon!"
>Well, at least some things never change.
>A huge flash erupts from her form as an aura of strangely spectral energy rips the world before her apart, shredding through the land and parting the clouds like oceans.
>It kinda tickles.
>...but it's hurting your eyes.
"Ahh...it's actually really warm..~"
>Hell, it was pretty, it was warm, and you weren't wet.
>Maybe this was nice of her after a-
>NOPE! Those were ponies screaming in terror behind you.
"Ah! W-wait, stop! You're going to hurt somepony, they might get a scraped knee!"
>But she obviously doesn't hear you from within this 'thing'.
>Yanking your legs from the dirt you begin to march towards her, the only real difficulty being the brightness of her attack.
>Like a candle, you pinch the tip of her horn between your finger and thumb, and almost instantly the laser disappears.
"There we go! No more temper tantrums now, okay?"
>She didn't respond, simply shivering with her eyes wide and pupils like specks.
>A huge flash erupts from her form as an aura of strangely spectral energy rips the world before her apart, shredding through the land and parting the clouds like oceans.
>It kinda tickles.
Am I bringing honor to my family, yet?

"You might not like an idea, but being strong doesn't give you the right to make people's homes a battleground. You could've hurt someo- pony. Sounds a little familiar, right?"
>However, there's still no response, as she's starting to...is she glowing?
>Yep, uhuh.
>She's glowing now.
>Her horn stutters with electricity, or something.
>The others back away as she starts to spasm with an overload of raw power.

>Somewhere in Canterlot...
>Celestia was just beginning to start her day with a smile.
>So far everything was going pretty well.
>She had tea, she had a fairly overcast day so no big worries about the sun right now.
>She loved the smell of the rain on the grass and flowers, honestly.
>A large rain shower wasn't just what the plant life needed, she thought.
>And it wasn't a busy day since most business affairs weren't so active on rainy days so day court was more akin to checking up on all the things she wanted to focus on.
>Today was going to be a very productive and relaxing day from the looks of-
"Huh...when did this rock get in my throne room?"
>Productive Day.

"So note to self: Pinching a horn is like trying to hold it in when you go to the bathroom."
>Currently, you were standing in ponyville.
>Which consisted half, or less, of a village.
>Princess Luna, as you learned her name, was currently wrapped in bandages and receiving a stern talking to from another tall horse that appeared in a flash of light.
>Her name was Princess Coldesria...
>Wait no...
>Princess Felretnia?
>She was a Princess.
>Right now you were too busy being one with the statue as ponies all around you seemed angered that you attacked their princess and blew up half of their village.
>Some things never change.
>You just sat there with a robe over your form as Twilight and her friends had a little chat in front of her castle.
>Scratch that; In front of her lobby.
Yes, satan. Yes you are.
Family? Satan does not have a family I don't think. but you please me known the less
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I did but invading the mortal realm is hard with Pic Related around.


>You were going to take advantage of the fact that the hole you made is no longer around.
>If you're lucky you might still be free of paying rent.
>Before you had a chance to be confronted by the exasperated lavender alicorn, however, you were instead approached by a white one.
>One which was actually quite tall, standing just slightly over you in height.
>Wow, so this was their leader or something?
>"Greetings, Saitama, isn't it?"
>Ah, it spoke!
>Wait, that was slightly racist.
"Oh, uh...yeah, nice to meet you. You're Princess, um..."
>Bad time to do this, brain.
>Thankfully she only chuckles at your forgetfullness and announces herself once more.
>In a much calmer fashion than the other one.
>"I am Princess Celestia, Co-ruler of Equestria and maintainer of the sun."
>Hold up.
>You make a subtle rewind motion with your hand while staring right through her.
"What do you mean by 'maintain' the sun?"
>She almost looked proud in that moment when you asked.
>The elegance radiating off of her form was beyond that of the comprehension of any pony she knew.
>Few could stand in her presence for long without feeling the tension of her raw power and passion.
>Not that she tried to be intimidating, but the care she put into every aspect of her being was apparent at a glance.
>"I am the matron of the sun, as my Sister is the matron of the moon. With my great magic I guide the sun along it's path to ensure that my ponies live every day in it's blessed light."
>She begins to monologue about her character.
>Which is familiar to you.
>"My power was granted to me thousands of years ago by my forefathers, and so on for them, the power of light itself. To carry not just strength but righteousness. I am Celestia, Alicorn incarnate. Surely Twilight told you of me?"
>Her eyes flitter, looking at you expectantly.
"Not even a little."
> not even a little
Something tells me that some problems are about to happen...
Also actual namefag, not satan, sadly. I lied.
Also anybody notice how this thread gets thrown down pages, then silence?

>You waited.
>And waited a while.
>Her eyes stayed on you as if waiting for something.
>Her face didn't budge an inch but she must have been desperately waiting to hear you say something, anything, really.
>You just stared back.
>Eventually you can only assume she realized you were being serious and proceeded on.
>"We should certainly get a health evaluation done, and after we clean up Ponyville I will see to it that you have a place of your own to rest at whilst we get Twilight's home back in order. Does that sound fair?"
>Leaning on one leg, tilting your head casually, you found yourself a little curious about this whole 'evaluation' thing.
"What do you need to evaluate? I'm just a guy."
>A really bored guy who hopes he won't have to say goodbye to the Manga shop nearby.
>"Well, you're the first of your kind that we have seen here, so it's only natural that we would want to learn more about your kind."
"Wait, you don't have humans here? I'm here on my own?!"
>Celestia's expression was mildly concerned, but mostly passive on the topic.
>"Mmm, nope. Can't say I've seen a species like you before. The closest otherwise would be a minotaur."
>Visions of your non-existent fanclub, girls waving signs with your name as you walked down the street after pummeling another mysterious being...
>Vanishing slowly...
>As a mortified expression grew on your face.
>"That is to say, once we get you evaluated, you'll be able to be registered as a citizen of equestria, perhaps even an ambassador of your race. You'd become very popular if you made the swing of being the first of your kind here."
>That was good and all but...
>"We would even provide a stipend as part of our endangered species protection act."
>Good enough for you.
"It will be an honor to be the ambassador for future peace, Princess."
really enjoying this mang
This is good, writefag
Got one, will get this moved over before bed. Promise.

>Celestia seems happy enough with your answer.
>"Then I will ask that you be brought to Canterlot sometime soon, likely tomorrow, to discuss more about your appearance here and perhaps see what all you can do."
>She turned herself to look over the damage encompassing the town, shaking her head solemnly.
>"Though, regretfully, it seems a good portion of the efforts to come will be repairing Ponyville after my sister's meltdown. I'm terribly sorry about her, by the way. I'm glad everypony, you especially, came out alright."
"Ah, yeah. She's strong but she jumps to conclusions too fast. You really gotta control when she...'Blows up' like that. Badum-Tsh."
>You're pretty sure you saw Celestia visibly wince at your pun.
>But you also saw a smile at your light-heartedness.
>"Yes, well, just try to forgive her. She really does mean well, it's just that she can be brash with her behavior."
>Hmm...Has a heart of justice, is actually very powerful, is socially awkward, brash, quick to make decisions, and somewhat naive?
>Oh, you know someone like that.
>Come to think of it...
>You wonder how Genos is doing.
>Ahhhh, he can handle himself. No need to get worried now.
>He's probably continuing his duties as normal.
>Or he could literally be having a meltdown.
>You are a little anxious to go home now, actually.
>Granted you've seen far stranger things than this.
>But he hasn't.
>And this is all still pretty strange.
>Actually, you've taken this all in stride pretty well.
>Hmm...well, you still aren't hurt, so it's not like you're in danger.
>The voice of Twilight reaches you as you turn around to see her standing near her friends, Celestia beckoning you to go talk with them.
>You could see the mixed reactions on their faces.
>From shock, to fear, to amazement, etc.
>Typical stuff.
>"*ahem*. Saitama, meet my friends, the elements of harmony."
>"Woah...he really 'is' an egghead."
Unfortunately, that'll have to do for tonight, as I'm losing focus. So I'll get this all moved into a pastebin and leave a link.
You certainly can't be this cruel..

I'm sure I don't know what you mean.

Also, anyone let me know if the formatting is a bit weird anywhere. When making pastes, sometimes it moves lines down at random. It's an easy fix, just annoying to catch.
>"My brony powers and my inner autism are too strong for you Celestia. Surrender!"
>"Your terror ends here, Anonymous."
>'Heh. That's what you think.' He says, unsheathing twin katana's
nothin personnel
He almost looks 'good' with that thing, it's just so sad he's such an autistic fuck. When I first saw that gif I was actually thinking 'Hey, that's not bad actually' but then you hear him speak and see it 'in action' and you just...cringe.
Sunset Shimmer please go.
>Woah...he really 'is' an egghead."
Oh dear.
Can't argue with what he did, though. He's a preddy good citizen.
>He really 'is' an egghead.

You fucked up, Rainbow cunt.
Sheesh, almost page 8. Late night bump.
>look of desparation and anger...

You fucked up.
He has no such emotions
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I watched one punch man because of this

fuck you, I didn't need more anime in my life
>Not knowing his hate for Mosquitoes.
>Not knowing his desperation for the sale down at the market.

He has them.

Just not when it matters.
He has them as comic relief.
Putting him in a room with windbagpone
I don't think he has his Cape yet
The struggle is real.
>tfw amazon.uk isnt selling opm vol 4
Who is saitama?
Main Character of One Punch Man
>Sweat pours down your forehead as you make a decisive strike crushing her defense.
>She roars out with laughter.
>"Hahahahahaha! Well played Anon, you are the first to get this far. But ill have you know, when i fight, i fight to the death!"
>She slams down her red checker piece aglow with her magic with the force of a thousand hooves.
>Brilliantly capturing a single black piece.
>"Now bow to your new queen! Soon you'll pay for you indiscretions, worm!"
>Game night is always so intense.
Bump for writefag
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>Reading a story including Saitama
>Not knowing who Saitama is
He is, in fact, still naked. With an undersized robe.
Mamoru Takamura in Equestria.

>That Rainbow Haired cretin physically could not see as Saitama's form phased into existence before her.
>Staring down with a look that just wasn't having it.
>It almost felt like an eternity before Rainbow finally realized what was going on.
>The wind from your movement finally caught up and ruffled everypony's mane.
>You spoke in a deceitful whisper.
"What did you just say to me, you little horse?"
>Though you could see the shock in her eyes, this one must have had some sort of complex.
>She quickly shook her head and then lifted herself off the ground to look at you.
>"You...you heard me, Bald-"
"You wanna fuckin' go?!"
>You were all up in her face now.
>"U-uh, haha! I bet I could run laps around you, b- uh, big guy. How about it? If you can catch me, I'll apologize."
>She landed daintily on the ground before trotting away and looking back at you.
>That smug grin on her face.
>You wondered what a bald pony would look like.
>You were morbidly curious now.
"Alright then. I dare you. Run."
>Twilight attempted to interject before anything could happen, though.
>"S-...Saitama? I know you're strong but racing Rainbow is a bad idea! She's the fastest flier in ponyville, and maybe even Equestria!"
>Don't care don't care don't care
>"She might be reckless at times but I assure you she doesn't mean bad. She just doesn't think before she acts!"
>Don't care don't care don't care
>"Let's not let this turn into a conflict, okay? L-look, we can-"
"Don't care don't care don't CARE!"
>This time it was Rainbow who spoke up, arrogance rising in her tone.
>"Yeah, Twilight, this is between us. And don't worry, it's as one-sided as you think. I'll have this guy worn out before you can even blink!"
>You dig your heels into the ground, ready to floor this asshole.
>She takes a stance in turn preparing to lift off.
>She thinks you can't catch her in the air.
>She will be missed.
>She spreads her wings in preparation.

>She wasn't an inch off the ground before you dug her back in with a swing.
>Granted you didn't hit her 'that' hard.
>She only had an imprint in the dirt.
>Your first always smoked after you punched something, don't worry.
"Teach you to badmouth a guest you little fucking bird-thing."
>You took a step back from the groaning mess currently eating mud.
>She was very slowly getting up, yanking her head from the ground with a gasp.
"Now, apologize."
>The shock and confusion on her face were glaring in her eyes.
>Oh boy, she better not be-
>"That's not fair! I-i didn't even say go! Yeah, that's it, didn't even let me!"
>You've got to be kidding me..
>"I deserve a 10 second head start for that one, jerk! I'm not apologizing unless you catch me fair and square!"
>You could visibly see how she took off the first time.
>Granted it was a centimeter or two at most.
"What are you talking about? If anything you were cheating. You were lifting off before you even said go."
>Her eyes shifted left and right nervously.
>Yeah, she knew you were right, too.
>"N-nuhuh! I don't know where you're getting these crazy ideas but this time I'm gonna say go and then YOU have to count to ten!"
>Why did they always have to make these things difficult on you?
>You don't even have a home.
>Picking on the homeless isn't cool.
"Fine. But if I catch you then, you still have to apologize. AND admit that you tried to gyp me."
>The turn of her head tells the story itself, nervous bite to her lip.
>"Sure, but that's ONLY if you catch me, then maybe I'll LIE about having tried to cheat!"
>You could see the orange one in the back look suspiciously towards the blue mare at that comment.
>Looks like she had something to say too, but she didn't get a chance.
>"Alright! Let's try this again. Reeeeady..."
>Once again, Twilight tried to step in.
>"Rainbow, wait! This is getting out of hoo-"
>You slowly took a breath, waiting.
>"On your maaark..."
>Come on...
"Just go already!"
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>Saitama hits RD
>RD isn't dead

>Apparently she took that as 'your' way of saying go because she was off like a bullet after that.
>The ground beneath her cracked greatly as she lifted off.
>Poor ground.
>You've been through so much today.
>The wind which followed would've been considered impressive if any...'pony' were around to see it.
>She was already an immense distance away by the time the dust settled.
>Twilight stared at you for a moment, then back to rainbow dash, then back to you in a panic.
>"W-wait, you're actually giving her the ten second head start?"
>Turning your head, she could tell you didn't quite understand what she meant.
>"She's already so far away! You won't make it if you-"
>And she was shut.
"Just relax. I'm gonna make her apologize."
>You counted, though you always sucked at pacing.
>Way ahead, Rainbow looked over her shoulder at the swiftly shrinking Ponyville, laughing to herself.
>"What a loser! Talking big and then acting all tough.-"
>"I can't tell if he started counting, *snrk*, Or he's just that slow! Hahahaha!"
>"I thought he stood right in Luna's laser but it must have been a trick of the light. Luck only gets you so far, jerk!"
>Nopony around you could comprehend what would happen in the next few seconds.
>The mare just kept flying and flying.
>Target locked...
>You put on your game face...

>Rainbow POV!
>Obviously the best pov out there.
>Not that you knew what Pov stood for.
>Nah, that was the new guy.
>Anyways, you lost track of time but you think 8 or 9 seconds passed.
>You're going too fast to care.
>Heck, you feel good!
>At this speed you could break a rainboom even.
>You doubt he could even withstand a rainboom.
He can pull his punches y'know.
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this is gonna be good

>And then it happened.
>Faster than you could even comprehend.
>You turned your head to the sound which echoed clear as day.
>And saw the fading image of a being who really couldn't be assed.
>And the slow motion of his hand swinging towards your face.
>It occurred in the very last seconds of what may as well have been your life.
>That sound you heard wasn't him saying ten as he approached.
>It was his sheer speed carrying the sound waves of his voice over the span of catching up to you.
>Fast enough that the vibrations couldn't disperse.
>High impact fistual violence.
>You bid this world farewell.

>Back at the castle.
>Twilight was currently watching the spot formerly known as the place where Saitama had been standing.
>Along with the other mares and Luna who had been nearby.
>The only one not watching it was Pinkie herself who instead turned to try and see where in tartarus he went.
>"Oh! Oh! Girls, look over there, I think Rainbow's winning!"
>You swiftly look off to the distance and follow Pinkie's gaze.
>"See? She pulled a rainboom!"
>Over the horizon you could in fact see what looked like a rainboom only...
"Why is it aimed at the ground?"
>Next to you the baffled farm mare threw in her two bits as well.
>"Or 'Rainbow-y' for that matter?"
>Then you notice something approaching...
>Oh Celestia...
"Is that him with Rainbow over his shoulder?"

>Being a hero is hard work.
>When you put up with bratty little pegasi like this.
>Not everyone wanted to be the little filly, you always reminded yourself.
>As you paraded back to ponyville with an unconscious mare over your shoulder, you marched your march.
>Because perhaps finally you would get some peace and quiet.
>That is until you said 'Hi'.
>"Oh my gosh! What happened?! Is she okay?!"
>Twilight was all up in your grill as soon as you stepped up to the castle grounds.
>She carried Rainbow off of you with her magic and placed her on the ground.
"Oh...yeah...she'll be fine."
>You think.
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>High impact fistual violence.

fucking gold
>You bid this world farewell
Great job saitama, that's one less pone we get to fuck when we find the portal you went in to get to Equestria
I need a drawfag for this greentext, only to generate /a/OPMfag butthurt, they are still fresh.

>Twilight still seems to be hyperventilating over Rainbow.
>Said pegasus still had a look of utter shock frozen on her face.
>It was several minutes before they finally woke her from the stupor she was in.
>You might have hit her a little 'too' hard.
>That impact turned out to be visible from here.
>Hopefully no one pays attention to the crater.
>Shaped like a pony.
>Rainbow finally got back up to it, and looked around.
>Taking in her surroundings, she looked quite lost.
>"What happened...? Why am I back here?"
>Immediately the pink one began yelling about amnesia and doing ridiculous checks to try and jog her memory.
>You think all the yelling and shaking was only making the mare nauseous, though.
>"Come back to me, Rainbow Dash! Don't forget all those times we spent together!"
>You wonder if you could legitimately fill a glass with those tears.
>Before you can even consider such possibilities, Rainbow manages to push Pinkie off and stand up.
>"Pinkie, knock it off! I'm not brain dead, okay? Last I knew, I was flying over the forest. And then I could've sworn I saw...HIM come out of nowhere!"
>Her hoof pointed to you, where everypony's eyes soon followed.
>The Orange one soon stepped up and put her hoof on 'Rainbow's shoulder.
>Come to think of it you JUST learned her name.
>It's as unimaginative as you predicted.
>"Listen, Sugarcube. Ah think he won! We heard him count ta nahn, and then he was off."
>Her hoof pointed out over to the patch of rain clouds circling an empty spot in the forest.
>"Couple seconds later there's a bang over th' forest and we could'a sworn you'd pulled a rainboom."
>That's when Pinkie decided to return.
>"Well, we thought, but it didn't look like a rainboom! I mean, it was big, and cool, and windy, but it wasn't rainboom-y! It was also aimed right at the ground! I mean, why would you be doing a rainboom into the ground? That doesn't make any sense, it's just dangerous, and-"
>Oh my god make it stop.
Next step: buck all apples from trees in AJ family garden with ONE CLAP of hands?
>Oh my god make it stop
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It's not just apples he's going to buck if you know what I'm saying

>"I was gonna bake you a celebration cake to celebrate, hehe! I mean, what else, right? Bu- MMPH!"
>Oh thank you, Twilight's hoof.
>Your face was visibly darkening as the voice went on.
>"What she means to say is, we're not sure what happened, but Saitama carried you back over his shoulder. We can only assume he caught you."
>Rainbow seemed to absorb this information slowly as she looked to all her friends who nodded solemnly at her defeat.
>In her mind, it was more like her humiliation.
>"But...but...didn't he count to ten? Nopony can catch me in a race, let alone with a headstart! I bet he didn't keep to his word! There's no way he counted to ten!"
>Stomping her hoof, you could see the tinge of pain in her eyes as she spoke.
>It wasn't that she was denying losing bu-
>"It's just- I just..."
>Maybe you went a little far...
>Once again, the orange pony approached Rainbow from the side with a stern tone in her voice.
>"Now listen here, Rainbow. If'n he tells us that he caught you, we'll have to believe him. As far as we know, he came back with you. We heard'em countin', don't think you can lie to us. Not ta me, now."
>Why did Rainbow suddenly have to look so sad and adorable with those big beady eyes of hers?
>"So...I really did lose even after all that..?"
>The white one stepped in shortly after to speak her mind with that...dainty voice of hers oh lord.
>"Perhaps after how crude you acted it is what you deserved. Maybe now you will think twice before exerting that ego of yours, hmm?"
>You could only watch as Rainbow shrank back further under the gaze of her friends.
>They were taking your side, which was nice, but...
>"A-and it's not very nice of you to point out a n...new pony's differences, Rainbow."
>Gah, fuck!
>You forgot that yellow one was there.
>Was she even part of this group?
>"You should, um, apologize! If that's okay with Saitama..."
>This was bad.
>You had no experience with considerate personalities.
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I could never, in a millennium, imagine Saitama doing such things.
He could potentially destroy something he bucks
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>You forgot that yellow one was there.
>Was she even part of this group?

Holy shit you just made me spill my drink
fuck, I just realised he was talking about Fluttershy.
I thought it was ment to be a background pony joke about AJ.

Now I feel like an idiot.
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>Rainbow, visibly backed into a corner by her friend's accusations seemed to be nigh speechless.
>You sigh gently.
>Well, there are worse moments to throw in the towel, you suppose.
"What are you girls talking about? I didn't catch Rainbow."
>All eyes are on you now, wide with surprise.
"You don't think I could catch someone that fast, do you? I mean I'm quick, but by the time I was out there, she was already out."
>Looking between each other quietly and awkwardly, the girls seemed to try to exchange mutual thoughts.
>Twilight stepped up to speak rationally, calling out your denial of the obvious.
>"But, um...Saitama, you carried her back and you didn't exactly crawl out of the starting line!"
>You were too busy cleaning out a particularly annoying clump in your ear.
>You think it had a bit of a feather in it.
>"Uhuh...and shortly after you ran after her, we saw the shockwave. Didn't you stop her in flight?"
>Rainbow herself seemed almost concerned with what you were saying.
>Until it slowly dawned on her.
"Yeah, she must have been so far ahead she skimmed a tree or something. I ran out there and found her on the ground. I was so panicked I ran her back to you girls."
>As the 5 of them went over what they thought happened, you couldn't help but watch Rainbow, who seemed intent on staring you down now.
>You were getting some glances from the orange one, too.
>Suspicious ones.
>Ain't no mare gonna read your pokerface, though.
>She spoke up to try and get 'the truth' out of you.
>You knew how to throw her kind off.
>"So y'all're sayin' that ya didn't catch Rainbow? And that ya don't want her ta say she's sorry?"
>You put on a face that read of slight embarrassment, running your hand along the back of your neck.
"Well, even if I did, I still sorta cheated, didn't I?"
>Everypony around you gasped at each other.
>Funnily enough, Rainbow looked like she got it.
"You only heard me count to nine, didn't you?"
Oh please, one who is so great and wise, share with us the knowledge of proper chili, then.
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trips confirm
the feels are real
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When will the discord commence?

Plotwist: they end like a bros

truly, the saikyou hero
"Genos... Millions are dead"


"I got bored and started running after that. Even if I caught her, I guess she doesn't have to apologize or anything so, either way, I still didn't win."
>Then a voice.
>"I heard a ten..."
>Turning your head, you meet Rainbow's eyes directly.
>She's looking at you with a sad stare.
>"While I was flying. You said it! You caught up with me, I saw you! "
"Haaa? What, are you stupid? How would I have caught up to you in less than a second?"
>The ponies were taken aback by your suddenly gruff tone, as you grimaced at the little multi-colored horse.
"You really hit your head, huh? I bet you didn't even have much in there to begin with. Seriously, do I look aerodynamic to you?"
>Sure, it wasn't the best feeling to see the others' faces turn a bit more sour at your attitude.
>But then again...
"We're not friends, geez. What're you, trying to cover for me? Everyone saw me lose, don't call me a liar, too."
>Some things never change.
"Next time, I'll really do you in. Just you wait."
>There was quiet in the air as you turned around and faced away from the group, slowly starting to walk away from the castle towards Luna.
>You could hear the whispers going back and forth.
>"Ugh, the nerve! She was only trying to be nice to him..."
>"Back at the farm we'd of bucked his face in for that kinda behavior!"
>"It makes Rainbow's attitude seem a little less rough don't you think?"
>They and a few of the oncoming background ponies came together from your little shouting fit, talking about the strange thing you were.
>But there were a few who could understand you.
>That's what mattered, you think.
>It might've seemed trivial at the time, but you suppose that's only because you didn't know what it was like.
>Having your friends turn on you for your humiliation.
>Being a hero is hard work.
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Saitama, you.....
>why is he always to the point?
>why is he always gonna be a great hero?
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>see this thread
>Oh cool, OPM in Equestria
>Start to read
Holy fuck, this has to become a new general

>As you distanced yourself from the group you almost shook up, you contemplated what life would have been like if you never became a hero.
>Would things be all that different?
>I mean other than the fact that the world would've ended several times over.
>Well, that's not necessarily true.
>There were other very strong heroes back home.
>You would probably still be in a run down place.
>Not much to do when you don't have great power.
>But is it really so different from having too much of it?
>At least you would've still felt the joy of risk.
>You did miss those days..
>"Excuse me..."
>Turning your head, you could see that a certain blue mare had followed you around the building.
>She didn't look sad or angry still, but she was obviously upset.
"What do you want? Didn't I tell yo-"
>"I'm sorry..."
>You turned to look at her fully, her eyes had trouble meeting yours after a bit.
"...Sorry for what, huh?"
>This didn't look easy for her but she finally settled on a smile.
>"I said...I'm sorry, for calling you...you know. E-even if you didn't win, I gueeess I can let this one slide. I thought you were a jerk but I suppose I didn't make it any better."
>Alright, you couldn't help it.
>You smiled a little bit.
>She obviously wasn't 'that' stupid, she knew what she saw back there.
"Well, next time let's just agree to disagree, okay? Now get going back to your friends, alright furball?"
>You made to walk away once more, back turned to her.
>"I'm lookin' at one, big guy."
"Sure thing, Rainbow. Sure thing."
>Being a hero could be rewarding work too, you guess.
>"Like you said, next time. Okay?"
>She had a smug look on her face again.
>Turning towards her, you gave her a toothy grin, and a stoic thumbs up.
"Work hard until then. Silly pony"
>Rainbow wasn't sure what it was in that moment, but as he turned to leave, she swore she saw something...waving in the wind. The very image before her was like that of...a hero.
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you're doing God's work, Anon

Please, never stop
Been a while since I have said this but u am enjoying this green
"Stop taking the power ups, King.


>A call from Twilight brought Rainbow out of her stupor.
>Shaking her head she couldn't help but smile, and laugh.
>Not her usual taunting laugh.
>There was something softer about this one...
>She had to save her image.
>"Whatever you say, baldy! See you around!"
>Wait a minute.
"What did you just-"
>Turning to see her already bolting around the castle to her friends, you grit your teeth.
>You couldn't help but chuckle behind the tension though.
>In fact it sorta just died down into a vague little laugh.
>You'll let her go for this time.
>"Our thanks, Sir Saitama, for letting her go as well."
>These ponies keep sneaking up on you, man.
>You're worried you're gonna accidentally punt one.
>Worst of all it was one of the tall ones.
"Oh...I don't know what you're talking about. Just saying that now."
>She looked to you with a knowing smirk, circling around to the other side of you and gazing up at the sky.
>"By the way, I should just warn you now that as strong as you may be, if you actually 'had' hurt Rainbow, one of the bearers of the elements of harmony and a citizen of Equestria..."
>She quickly closed in, her muzzle by your ear with a playfully devilish tone.
>"We would likely have sent you to the moon for transgressions against our nation. Murder is very much so looked down upon."
>She then proceeded to back off, still grinning.
>She personally thought she had scared you good.
"The moon, huh...?"

>"-nergy released from my body is turned into a propelling force, elevating speed and power beyond the limitations of living flesh!"

>You liked that guy.
>He was fun.
"I was there once. It's very cold up there, to be honest."
"I just jumped back to earth, though. I don't think that'll work."
>To describe the look on Luna's face as you turned your head back to her, you would have to discover a way to combine a mortified expression with an offended glare.
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>To describe the look on Luna's face as you turned your head back to her, you would have to discover a way to combine a mortified expression with an offended glare.
Pretend One Punch Man was never written, but this story still was just like it is. Would any of you actually enjoy it or would you call it trash due to him being a Mary Sue?

Cause I'm have a sort of existential crisis on being a hypocrit right now

>"From the moon. To the earth."
>Apparently this concept was hard to grasp.
>I mean, you saw on tv once that the moon wasn't 'that' far away from the earth.
>Or something.
>"We...we need to go lay down."
"Uh, you gonna be alright?"
>"Yes! Yes...just go see Twilight, she should be able to help you afford a room somewhere. I'm...going back to bed."
>With that the dazed looking mare began to unsteadily trot away.
>You wonder what you said wrong.
>You'll learn one day.
>Priorities, priorities.
>Speak of the devil, there's Twilight now.
>"Saitama, Saitama! There you are. Why did you do that!?"
"Do what?"
>"Why did you cover up like that?"
"Because it's cold."
"Twilight, I'm cold."
>You took a glance over at the damaged castle, which was still pretty much just rubble.
"Also, we're homeless."
>"I know..."
"Might wanna get that fixed."
>"Let's just go find a place to stay for the night, Saitama..."
>With that you marched, as carelessly as you always do, behind the distraught mare towards your new home.
>At least for a while.
>Come to think of it, you hadn't even thought about going home in the past 3 and a half hours since you've been here.
>You've sort of had bigger matters to consider.
"Oh my god, I'm naked!!"

>"It's not my fault, Twilight! I HAD clothes when I came here!"
>"D-don't pin this on me! You looked like a rabid animal!"
>"Yeah, well- Vrrtz"
>The monitor wirred as the screen faded to black, the dark room aglow with the outline of a towering figure amidst his throne.
>It's red eyes glaring into nothingness as a single name echoed from his whispers.
I hadn't even heard of One Punch Man before this, and I think this is fucking hilarious
anon we do not discus these things
because i dont know
It'd still be One Punch Man, wouldn't it? It's not like we expected much when we read the original ONE comic. Personally, a rose by any other name, as they say. Even the original author didn't expect much when he first made it. Saitama is, in himself, the essence of trope inversion. Though I'd be madly honored if I could be the originator of something so amazing.
You ain't knocking celestia to the floor without getting a 3 star, star punch just dodge and weave baby find that opening and JAB
Oh shit, an arc? Fuck yes.
Will you continue to write?
will we find out who the red-eyed figure is or will you abandon us?
please so you will continue writefriend.
>its cold
Don't worry, I will deliver more soon. There are darker powers at work here, young here.

Also upated the pastebin, and to make finding the link easier; http://pastebin.com/Yj23eN0r

Thoughts so far?
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>Thoughts so far?
Pic related
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10/10 please continue
Well, Anon was really


HN CENA!!!..
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I'm crying tears of joy. My favorite comedy anime and my favorite show clumped up so perfectly.
Its like I'm dreaming of this happening and its turning into story form in front of my eyes.
>tldr; I love you
Aww, that's just about adorable. Alright, well, I gotta make a run down to the store real quickly first but once I get back I'll have more to go. I've got a bit of a draft for ideas so I should be good for a little bit. I should be back in, mmm...40 minutes-ish? It's just a quick run.

For the record; Yes I will likely be making up shit. Characters, stories, awesome attack names. You'll just have to wait and see.

He was speedwalking
Godspeed, writefriend...

Will you ever write an arc where saitama becomes a villian from being too powerful and destroys equestria? In one punch? Basically a what if bad ending?
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>Not quite understanding the point of Saitama.

Well I'll keep the thought in mind. Also, that took a lot longer than it was supposed to. But I'm back.
our lord and savior returns!
tell us oh greatness, what have you witnessed during your travels?
was there anything standing out in particular?
>anything like so?

>A mare's embrace.
>That's- That was...
>The name of the hotel you and twilight were going to be staying at.
>It was apparently the most popular in the city right now.
>Namely because it was the only hotel in the city right now.
>You and Twilight had been given express reservations, along with Spike who turned out to be a dragon.
>You knew your perception of your opponents was warped after all these years but damn.
>You must be getting old.
>But from the little you saw of this hotel before you and Twilight departed for 'Carrots-sell buttik' or whatever, you saw what the place was like.
>At first it was befitting of it's praise, since it looked well maintained and everything.
>Then you got to the theme behind the place.
>As it turned out, the other half of it's name came from the fact that it's caterers were all female, and though you didn't understand it in the slightest, they were apparently dressed 'skimpy'.
>That doesn't even make sense to you considering the Princess of Friendship is actually dressed in less than you are right now.
>This was also when the disturbing revelation hit you that 90% of the inhabitants of this town are, in fact, naked.
>What made that both relieving and disturbing is that you still haven't seen any of their 'parts'.
>You're still too nervous to ask Twilight so you just don't say anything.
>Instead she guides you, apparently making noises that you aren't listening to about the history of Ponyville, to a building.
>A building that does not belong here.
>Untouched by the oncoming battle, despite it's proximity to the explosion.
>Stands a circus.
>What you marvel at even more than it's safety is that everything AROUND it is gone.
>And you can find seemingly no explanation for this.
>You know people who would have a field day with this stuff.
>Twilight graciously gave the door a good knock.
>"Welcome to carousel boutique the ONLY fabric store in t- Twilight! And...you."
>It just never ends, does it?
Merely a vision of great and terrible things to come. You know, the usual.


"Why do you have a clothing store if nobody wears anything?"
>All together abandoning further greetings, the mare turns on her hoof and scoffs at you.
>"Why of course I wouldn't expect one such as yourself to understand!"
>Twilight, in turn, groaned and desperately tried to reach out.
>"Rarity, please wait!"
>You've come to learn the crown means nothing.
>"This is by far the most elegant of establishments! My life's work portrayed in only the most fantastique of business with a repertoire of royalty!"
>Points for the alliteration.
>"And you, monsieur, are um...how do I say this, Tu n'es pas dans style."
>You could hear her giggling as she added the inflection into her tone.
>You don't speak german but you're pretty sure you know what she's saying.
"Oh. Actually, that's sorta why we're here. This robe is way too small."
>You make a point of lifting your arms to show that this robe barely covered up your lower parts.
>It was built for the length of a pony's form, which was still just a bit too little.
>Thankfully Twilight knew how to talk to this animal.
>"Y..yes, well anyways. Rarity, Saitama here had a bit of a run-in with me back at the castle this morning and by golly his clothes just up and disappeared-"
"She tore my clothes off."
>"Rarity, it's not what you think!"
>But it looked like Rarity was having none of that.
>She turned away and simply covered her eyes, as if removing the thought from her head all together.
>In time to miss your playful smirk.
>"Just...just tell me why you're here."
>Twilight seemed completely defeated, you could see the gravity of her embarrassment as she hung her head low.
>"We just...need some outfits for Saitama."
>You almost couldn't see the speed at which Rarity spun around with stars in her eyes.
>"Of COURSE I'll design for your new friend! Oh I've always wanted to work on different species!"

"Well that was fast..."
>You're almost a little bothered by how shallow that looked on her.
>Good thing she has you as a new mannequin, geez.
>"Well I'm not the element of Generosity for nothing, Darling!"
>Element of...
"Ah, that's right!"
>*insert traditional fist in palm realization*
"Twilight, you were talking about these elements of Harmony, right?
>Groggily looking up at you, you could see the energy draining from her visage.
>This was obviously not how her day was supposed to go...you kinda feel bad.
>"Yeah...what about them?"
"...Could you, um...tell me about them?"
>"*GASP* Oh my gosh! YES! I LOVE history lessons! Wait right here, I'm gonna go grab my notes! Wait, I can teleport!"
>To which she proceeded to poof from existence in a flash of your disbelief.
>Only to reappear with a literal mountain of books and notes next to her.
"W-woah...how...where did you get those?! I thought your castle blew up!"
>"Oh, heh! I keep several copies of every single notebook I've ever written and then copies of those and why WOULDN'T I have an underground storage system throughout ponyvile in the event I'd need several copies of notes?!"
>That was not a sane smile on her face.
>Meanwhile, Rarity who was somehow oblivious to this happening had already prepped a stage for you to try on various outfits.
>You don't think you can punch this situation...
"Ah...it looks like god has died..."

>2 minutes later.
>You stand on the stage with Twilight rambling at your side and Rarity at the other with a measuring tape.
>"And over 2000 years ago when Princess Celestia had been crowned as new ruler of Equestria instead of Countess of Canterlot she brought the spirit and knowledge of Friendship to every home-
>"-lements were used many times in the past with the defeat of great foes such as Nightmare moon and-"
>"-Origin lies in none other than the tree of harmony lying deep in the Everfree forest, home to many mysteries-"
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>That was not a sane smile on her face.
"Ah...it looks like god has died..."
Writefriend, stop, I'm drowning!
Theirs too much spaghetti!
We've clearly reached a point we should have stopped.

Let's keep going and see what happens.

>And every new chapter Rarity came rushing out with some new fashionable outfit for you to try on.
>Modifications of existing outfits that seemed oddly familiar.
>Chapter 1 she had you measured.
>Chapter 3 had you in a grey suit with a red tie with the initials J.J. on a handkerchief and flowing brown-ish black wig.
>Chapter 6 threw you in an outfit frighteningly similar to Metal Bat's school uniform, only green. Pompadour included.
>Chapter 34 had youa blue coat with khaki shorts, tennis shoes, and a red cap turned backwards with a bandage on your forehead for good measure.
>That one also had a school backpack for some reason.
"Why do they all have wigs...?"
>You're pretty sure you can feel your teeth rounding as you've got vains poppings out through your neck and forehead after chapter 44.
>Then that dainty voice hits you again.
>"Oh, and I have this one based on a beautiful drama about a man with no emotions an-"
>From the other side.
>"Chapter 53 the meaning of harmony-"
>Deep in your mind...
>A twig snaps.

>Outside Carousel Boutique.
>You're so sorry this place had windows.
>And visitors at the door.

>You stand panting, as the two ponies which were beside you lay in clumps of clothing and books.
>The books start talking first.
>"Maybe we should just...paraphrase. Okay, Rarity?"
>It took a few minutes, Twilight using her magic to help clean up the mess when finally the books and clothes were gone.
>You were sat down with your head against your hands which were folded up on your lap.
>The two were sitting somewhat nervously next to you after that whole ordeal.
>"Y-yes, Darling?"
>She's watching for your triggers now.
>But you have something important to hold onto.
>Standing, the light above your shining head, you speak.
"I...am a hero. A fighter for justice. A man of action."
>For a moment you could've seen the growing magic in her eyes.
>The wonder.
"I need Sweat pants."
I never saw that point, neither should we stop.

>She's as astonished by your courage as you expected.
"A true hero...lives on a small budget and a modest life! A white t-shirt and sweatpants is all I need!"
>Twilight is currently holding her hoof to her face as you look into nothingness with determination.
"Also...my hero suit would be wonderful."
>You nod your head, eyes closed in contemplation.
"It's yellow, touch, and has a long white cape. Also the gloves and boots are red."
>Rarity's mind has to really struggle to take in this sheer testament to his...his Heroism, we're going with that.
>"I'm...going to need a drink, dears. Let's just get this over with."
>That's the spirit.
>Rarity steadily exits the room, removing the fancy fabrics and styles from sight while Twilight shakes her head.
>"That poor mare."
>"Well, I'm sure she'll do...a job. So there's that! Anyways I suppose now I can give you the streamlined version of my lecture."
"Please do, Miss Twilight."
>The respectful tone in your voice must have taken her by surprise.
>"Oh...well in that case, um.."
>She clears her throat before using her magic to dim the lights a little bit.
>You guess it's more atmospheric that way.
>"The elements of Harmony, to put it simply, are ancient relics born far before the time of the two sisters; Celestia and Luna. Their origin is rather unknown in the long-run but they are...gems, you could say. 6 Jewels, to be exact."
>You give her a faint nod to signal that you're following.
>Rarity, in the meantime, carries some piles of simple fabric and a bottle of red wine over to her sewing table.
>And- Goodness that's a loud machine.
>"And the eleme- *WHIIRRR* Elements encom- *WHIRRR* Oh for Celestia's sa *WHIIRRR*"
>Twilight hops to her hooves in frustration and quickly casts a spell which locks you and her in a bubble.
>Very pretty bubble.
>"THANK. FFF- Lessons...lessons..."
>She's trembling.
>"One moment...Okay, I'm good."

>To avoid her blowing up the boutique, most likely, you just nod your head.
>"The elements encompass 6 great virtues which all embody the essence of Friendship. They're what brought my friends and I together, by tying our fates with their power."
>She uses her horn-thing to create a hologram image of 6 little stones, each of a familiar shape...
>"There are 6 elements for me and my friends, 6 in all! Kindness, laughter, loyalty, honesty, generosity, and the final element: Magic."
>6...Twilight, AppleJack, Rarity, Rainbow, Pinkie...
>You're forgetting something.
>Hmm...not important right now, at least.
"Wait...why is Magic an element?"
>Twilight just smiles a genuine, emotional smile to you.
>"Because, Saitama. Friendship IS Magic. In every friendship is something unexplainable. Something you couldn't uncover even with ages of dissection of friendship structures. Something that brought many wise ponies to a foolish end. It's Magic!"
>Yeah- no.
>You're clueless.
"I don't understand in the slightest but fascinating anyways."
>Twilight just sorta...stared.
>Her smile remained but her expression emptied.
>Almost peaceful...
>"For Celestia's sake the elements are weapons of harmony we use to stop badguys! They embody traits which make us stronger by understanding them! THERE!"
>Woooah there.
"Twilight I think you need to take a nap or something. Are you okay?"
>The bubble popped.
>That whirring returned.
>And Twilight disappeared in a flash leaving only a note on Rarity's desk about how you'd be 'elsewhere' for a while.
>Oh wait, no.
>She just flew through the ceiling.
>Yeah, that's probably how you would've done it too.

>A long while later, as in long enough for you to fall asleep on a comfy chair which was obviously built for a human being, you are awoken.
>By the annoyed harumph of a pony.
>Staring at you with her big, shiny eyes and her glowing horn.
>Her hair was disheveled and she looked quite tired.
"...Took you long enough."
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>She stared.
>And opened her mouth.
>And closed it.
>And then dropped something in your lap.
>Looking down at what it was, you could only smile.
>You were offered a changing room to which you gladly discarded the robe you were using, and from the outside the sounds of thick, stretchy, firm material against human unobtaniu- skin could be heard.
>Rarity herself had to admit to herself that she had a bit of fun designing the clothing even if it was plain.
>'And he's not 'unfit' either...but really, that suit is outra-'
"There! Fits like a charm!"
>And he emerged from the stall.
>Cape flowing behind him good as new.

>Rarity POV
>Pic Related

>Hero-ing time.
>You looked down at her as the bottle she was carrying fell to the ground.
>That's gonna stain...
>You set that up on the table next to her and reach in your-
>Oh right...no wallet.
"Sooooo thanks for the suit and clothes! See you around!"
>You're quick to grab your bags and head out the door.
>You only just now realize you napped for a good portion of the day.
>The sun was starting to set already and the sky was darkening.
>You suppose it's back to that crazy hotel with you then.
>Strangely enough your suit actually draws some attention this time whilst strolling down the street.
>It's nice to have it back for a while, though it'll be time to dress down soon.
>From the looks of it, this whole place is kind of 'western'.
>You've never been outside of Japan but damn.
>They're fucking weird.
>You see beds.
>On stands.
>They don't just sleep on a tatami?
>You hoped you could get 'any' sleep tonight...
>After today, though, you're pretty beat.
>You had to listen to a LOT of talking.
>Tomorrow is a new day, though.
>You're sure there's going to be plenty to do, which actually kind of excites you.
>New world, new beings...new challenges.
>Yeah! It might not be so bad here after all.
"I suppose home can wait a while. Heh, Here I come Equestria!"
Welp, I'm headin' to bed.
Goodnight everypony!
keep it bumped fellow anons

>Night time comes across Equestria.
>It's slow, but everypony finally starts to wind down for the night and what remaining shops were around closed up.
>Twilight mentioned that tomorrow, supply caravans with materials to rebuild would be coming in.
>You admit you felt a little obligated to help out, but are told that Luna herself said she would take your place.
>After all, you were wanted up in Canterlot and she admitted she did cause a lot of the damage.
>And thankfully Twilight has completely forgotten how you blew a hole straight through her castle.
>Literally straight through.
>You're not sure how it happened but you went to the complete opposite side of her home when you started punching walls.
>But...we'll just say it was Luna.

>Unaware as you were, sleeping on this absolutely amazing mattress which you totally needed to replace your Tatami with, a watchful eye looked all across the town of Ponyville.
>"To think so much damage could be caused by one 'thing'...it's best if the ponies don't ally with him, though he seems to be doing a good enough job of that on his own."
>Shadowy in the moonlight, atop the ruins of the castle which once radiated Friendship, a vibrant laugh echoed.
>"I guess it's our lucky day. Sleep well, 'Princess'..."
>As quickly as he had appeared, the silhouette had vanished like a black mist.
>But a shadow still loomed over Ponyville.

>*....iiii.......iing....iiiing....Riiiing. Riii*
>The tense noise of a sharp alarm buzzing in the ears of an everyday hero awoke his morning with the traditional ritual.
>Smashing the alarm through the floor boards.
>And with it, the nightstand it was on.
>You should really talk to room service.
>...It malfunctioned.
>Yawning into your hand, you can feel only sadness at having to leave the embrace of your sweet, sweet matress and bedding.
>Being friends of royalty could be a wonderful thing.
>But from the noise being made you could tell that the caravans were here.
>...Was that singing...?

>Standing by your window you gaze out, expression mildly curious whilst you saw basically a parade of ponies moving down the road in a neat order.
>Caravan runners and some of Twilight's friends were out there.
>In fact Twilight herself was out there flying around.
>It looks like they're all feeling better after all of that.
>You could see them dancing through the air, the whole town grabbing supplies and working to renew their devastated buildings.
>"-othing we can't do, togetheeer~ We'll build ourselves a hoooome~"
>Huh...you didn't get it but it wasn't bad.
>Something about teamwork against all odds.
>Hey, looked kinda fun, even.
>But you still had to get ready for the day, which involved a trip to the home of the Princesses, supposedly.
>Slipping on your traditional casual wear of a hoodie with your loveable vulgar phrase on it, you begin to descend the stairs to the lower floors, where they have a large dining area.
>Looks like the stove was cooking Alarm.
>Your favorite, too bad you're definitely not hungry right now.
>Get out get out get out.
>You exist as fast as you can without looking too suspicious, and are greeted to a surprisingly beautiful sight.
>The sun is shining brightly above, with just a few clouds here and there.
>And before you is this little parade thing of ponies working surprisingly efficiently to put back together their broken land.
>It was actually kinda heart warming.
>Back home if something was busted up they'd just get Bof- Metal Knight to put it back together.
>But something was definitely not right about a few things.
>You knew for a fact that it wasn't this easy to get people-ponies-same thing together, let alone for a task this big.
>And nothing has come to obliterate their hard work claiming to take over the world yet.
>Even the ponies themselves still had qualities of which you had to question.
"How do they do that levitaty stuff...?"
>"I believe it is some sort of telekinetic field, sensei."
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>S E N S E I
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>Turning your head...
>Very, very slowly...
>Your eyes meet with a very familiar black and yellow pair of eyes...
>You practically scream, thrown into an utter panic as jump away from the randomly appearing cyborg.
>You hit a caravan truck and knock it over by accident, drawing plenty of eyes, but thankfully they ignore it mostly in favor of the song.
>Nopony got hurt...
>But forget that.
>You see Genos himself offer a hand to help you up which you take, feeling for certain that those were metal parts.
>"I did not intend to surprise you, Sensei. I merely was hoping to help speculate with you."
>Standing up before him, you have the blankest stare.
>The most unpurturbed look you could possibly have.
"I have several questions."
>"Quantum computing available answers..."
>Oh my god it really was Genos.
"Come with me."
>You pull him by his arm away to an alley where you stay away from public eyes.
"Genos how did y-"
>He's STILL checking his databanks.
>"One moment, Sensei, I'm deciphering rethorical answers as well."
>Meanwhile said boy was muttering potential answers to himself.
>"Magic...plot twist...Blame Pinkie...who's Pinkie?"
>"Ah, perhaps that too is a question which needs an answer! Searching databanks for pink-"
>He is silenced with a soft, but well deserved, slap across the cheek.
>He blinks, staring off into space for a moment.
>You once thought that you could crash his system by interrupting scans.
>That wouldn't be so bad here.
>But instead he hangs his head and lets his shoulders fall.
>"I got lost in my curiosity again..."
"Oh Genos...you just...you don't change, do you?"
>His strange yellow iris turns up towards you once more, reading what you said curiously.
>"But...Sensei, I changed my parts out just the other day. And before that, I upgraded my parts entirely exactly-"
>Your cold hard stare looked deep into his mechanical eyes and told him that now was indeed not the time for this.
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Y'all faggots didn't think this wasn't gonna happen, did you?

>He got the message.
>"I will answer to the best of my ability, Sensei Saitama."
>You try to hold a smile but it twitches with realization that this is the most surprising thing you've seen so far.
>But you take a breath and relax, and think that Genos must have been a victim in this too.
"So...how did you get here? Do you know why? If I remember, I just woke up here yesterday."
>Perhaps he only just arrived this morning, and searched for you?
>That would actually be very respectable and dependable of Genos.
>You guess you didn't give him enough credit.
>"Ah, well, when I saw yesterday that you were gone I went into a panic and searched everywhere until I begged the doctor to help me track your location. He told me you appeared to have been pulled beyond rifts so I stopped thinking and had the doctor shoot me through a similar frequency to find you even though I had no idea if we'd be able to make it back or not."
>This...this little 'thing' was smiling the entire time he spoke.
>You couldn't feel a greater chill run through your form.
"And...and how long ago did this all happen?"
>"Merely an hour after you left, Sensei."
"You didn't think I was just been out shopping?"
>"I considered the possibility to console my computations but when I found the note I realized something was off."
>You didn't even wake up in your room this morning.
"What note? Wait, Genos do you still have it?"
>"Yes, Sensei!"
>He reached into the pocket of his jeans and procured a neatly folded piece of paper.
>The note itself read; 'Dear Genos, Out on an adventure without you, battling great opponents, will be back whenever. Wish you were here, Tata. -Saitama'
"This doesn't look anything like what I would write! I'm glad you know me well enough to know this was a fake, Genos."
>Genos proudly smiled and straightened out his shoulders.
>"Of course! Your hand-writing isn't nearly that clean, Sensei!"
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Loving everything about this.
Short break, working up material, but I hope you all know that now I intend to take this all the way.

This is actually way more fun than I thought it'd be and I already thought it'd be fun.
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You're a god amongst men, writefriend.

>Genos was making this REALLY hard on you right now.
>But, you had to admit, it was very clear that whosever handwriting this was, they obviously practiced.
>Which meant they were intending to make you disappear, but must not have known very much about you.
>Other than Genos, it seemed like they were pretty much oblivious to your nature.
>You probably wouldn't have even left a note for Genos to be honest.
"Well...wait, how did the doctor know what frequency to look for? Or rather, how did he find where I went at all?"
>"Ah, that, well you see, Sensei, I have been collecting samples of the leftovers of your food and manga you've lost to find the source of your power through your habits. So we had some biological traces that were likely affected by whatever had taken you."

>Transmitting Head's Up Display: Genos.
>A.K.A. Genos POV.
>Current log: Dated uknown due to current surroundings.
>For all you know summer was when the world flooded.
>It is exactly 08:45.
>Otherwise known as a quarter to 9.
>It appears something you've said regarding your research efforts has bothered your teacher, Saitama.
>Though you're sure it's simply that he doesn't wish to speak about his bad habits, you know for a fact that no leftover dinner of his has actually survived very long.
>His fridge is in dire need of cleaning.
>The only conclusion you can come to is that he's so busy with his secret training that he has no time.
>And this limitation in his mind is a devestating weakness that he would never tell you directly.
>He just couldn't bare to imagine that you would respect him any less for his faults as well.
>He is such a noble man.
"Apologies, Sensei, I didn't mean to bother you with this information but as it is currently crucial to our situation, I had no choice."
>You would attone for breaching your Master's trust like that.
"By the way, Sensei, where are we?"

>Be a really annoyed Baldy right now.
"Genos, I'm gonna slap you again."
Dude, feel good about what you've written, cause it's really good.
don't you dare stop now you glorious bastard

>It was way too early for this shit.
>But, you suppose beyond just how ridiculous it is that one thing you admit would've been nice to go without for a day or two FOLLOWED you here, it'll be nice to have some company.
>That wasn't a horse.
>Listening closely, you can actually hear that the song itself is coming to a close.
"Well, alright, Genos listen. I'll explain more on the way but what do you know so far?"
>Genos' head swerved to spot everything he could and give a detailed analysis of his gathered information.
>"The saturation levels of the environment are unhealthily high. Light refraction dictates a high possibility that getting a tan here is very unlikely, Sensei."
"Sometimes you're like an old laptop, and I just wanna give you a good smack. You know that Genos?"
>The one time you try to be serious and Genos hasn't even done a basic study of his surroundings.
"Genos did you sprint all the way to me after you landed here?"
>His eyes shifted downwards towards the ground while his lips refused to move for a moment.
>"I...Yes. I believe I ran somewhere up to 175 Kilometers from the north east. If they still call it that."
>"Oh don't worry, we do, silly!"
>Jesus, this pink one!
>She just dropped out of nowhere!
>Wait...oh, she was on a support above the two of you.
>"Sensei, what is this thing?"
>You ignore him for now.
"Pinkie, how much did you hear?"
>The mare, how happened to be hanging from a support rope rappeling down the side of the nearby building giggled childishly.
>"Not too much, considering I didn't understand half the stuff about the frequency whoziwhatsits and all. Maybe Twilight would know? Oh! Let's go ask her!"
>However, by the time the mouth with legs launched back up the building you were already standing up their poised to catch her in your grip.
>She squeaked like a rubber toy and her head inflated, though she doesn't show signs of pain.

>Tele-run back to the alleyway and you have pinkie suspended in your grip to keep her from running off to yap on about interdimension travel.
>You got a bad feeling from the thought of Twilight figuring out that there was a scheme behind this.
>You'd rather tell her on your own terms rather than let word of mouth get out.
"Pinkie, listen...this is a big surprise. So don't go telling Twilight about anything, okay?"
>Her eyes went wide as she stared, almost as if losing herself in a daze.
>Genos meanwhile was poking this 'creature' in the side trying to figure out why it's neck hadn't snapped yet.
>"Is it a talking Marshmallow?"
>When Pinkie suddenly gasped wildly you and Genos both jumped back at the loud noise, Genos putting his hands in front of his face.
>"Sensei, it's a bomb!"
>But soon she plowed both hooves into her mouth to prevent her from making any more noise.
>She waved for you to come down closer, and so you did, cautiously.
>"Listen...I'm really bad with secrets..."
>This did not surprise you in the least.
"But I need you to do this, Pinkie!"
>You could visibly see the panic growing in her eyes as though they flashed with visions of the past.
>Genos was already poised with his flamethrower at the ready.
>Who knows what he would do if you weren't there sometimes.
>Slowly Pinke uncovered her mouth and proceeded to bite her lip, groaning in apparent agony at having found another secret to keep.
"Pinkie, do you genuinely think you can't keep this secret?"
>She looked nervously left and right, at first slowly nodding her head.
>But then it shifted into furiously shaking it.
>"It's so hard to keep secrets because you know someone is going to find them super cool and interesting and you wanna see them happy and then spread the happiness but then if you tell someone's going to be unhappy and-
"Pinkie look over there!"
>She turns her head excitedly where you point.
Grammatical errors...I might need to take a small break again, the caffeine is only doing so much. How'm I doing with characters, do you think?
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The characters are spot on
Saitama seems a little vulgar and jerkish to me, but it's a very minor thing.
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Eh it's a little jaring. But I'm laughing greatly
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Really? I'm not sure about that, I mean he could be a pretty big dick when he wanted to be. 'Hero' is a very loose term sometimes, is how I see it. But maybe I'll try to watch it. Again, I'm running low on fumes right now so yeah.
Please at least tell me you want more than heat in your chili. It's fine if you don't like sweet chili, but if the capsaicin levels are all that you care about, you have no clue what good chili is.
I'm loving it. I hope you continue long enough for ponies to know how Saitama become so strong.

Saitama has always been a jerk with a heart of gold.
Yeah, I think that'll be enough for tonight. Gonna try and beat my bodily functions and get some rest and sleep so I can be up early. Earlier I can get up, the earlier and more effectively I can write. And as long as people ask, I'll always have more write in me. I've already got plans ready. Let's hope they don't go to waste.

Oh, and pastebin is up to date. There are a couple links around here somewhere.

There, this should do.

Looking forward to getting back to this soon.
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I will await your return, grorious writefriend!
Depends on where in the manga we're talking. At the start, he's more openly dickish, crass even, but as time passes, he becomes much more traditionally heroic, though he is still, at his core, the guy who wants recognition for his accomplishments. In recent days, he tends to only be "dickish" so that his fellow heroes don't look bad in comparison to him, like with the Sea King incident.
And again
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>"Sensei, it's a bomb!"
Bumping for more of this greatness or at least a Pastebin link
Their are links throughout the thread.
Just saying.
For all One Punch Man fans, here's a story that just came out that looks promising.


Although, fair warning, it's set in a universe where humans are pets.
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Oh, I remember the 'Human and you' universe shit.
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I like what I'm reading so far. Keep up the good work anon.
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>god is dead
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Oh I remember it too
I actually think that point is debateable. Rather it's an illusion of the series developing. Whenever a situation becomes grave or dangerous, saitama is mature enough to handle it like a hero because he still is the little ruffian from a few years back who wanted to protect people. That's why he was so willing to give up his victory against the deep sea king. But he is still a younger man. Whenever no one is in danger, it's really just minor annoyance after minor annoyance. That's also why when Saitama realized that his own negligence was putting others at risk with the deep sea king, as in licenless rider going to fight DSK despite the futility. Saitama realized what people were putting at stake. But I dont think it's that he has changed that much, though he is a much more social person, yeah. I'd just say rather that it's the world around him which is getting constantly more intense and displays people's struggles more. But since it's still a major work in progress I dont think either of us should make too many assumptions

Also im here sorta but might need a little while before i can properly write. 2 hours at most. It'll happen dont worry. How is everyone today? I enjoy hearing thoughts and reactions of readers, or just anybody.
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this is me rigth now if you dont start writing
Patience, young one, the writefriend has spokith
I'm loving the journey and enjoying the ride. Are any other "heroes" going to show up or is it just Saitama and Genos?

I think it would be really funny if King showed up and became the new overlord of the Crystal Empire because he looked scary and no one would face him. How you would keep him included, I don't know.
Heroes? Maybe. Something strange is certainly going on. New and old faces (maybe), oh my!
Obligatory bump.
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and just like that times up writefriend
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You can't rush art.
I for one am enjoying reading this
Toy story 2 refrence?
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I'm just saying what the time is dear friend>>26009483
a bugs life
And just like that my mother had a medical emergency. She is fine now, merely a delay. Gonna make a quick run to the store before they close and then I'll have a good few hours just to write for you.

All I ask is another 30 minutes, dearly beloved.
I'm sorry to hear, I hope I wasn't rude in any sort of way
Don't worry, it was partly her fault anyways to be honest. It was just surprising. Also, part the seas, coming through.
Why didn't I come to this thread earlier?

Why haven't I read this manga yet?

Why haven't I watched the show?
>pic related

>Poor girl.
>She saw too much.
>Thankfully knocking a pony unconscious was as non-morbid as you could've hoped for.
>The lump in your arms had spiral eyes and everything.
>"May I take a sample for the lab?"
>Blondie here had a lot of adjusting to do.
"As long as you put it back where you found it there should be no problem but first we gotta see Twilight."
>It probably isn't a good idea to hide a nigh-on weapon of mass destruction like Genos from the reigning monarchy.
"Don't worry. I'll do some explaining on the way."

>Day Build a Home in Equestria!
>With all your pony friends in tow you and the crew managed to get production of your home underway.
>Things were looking up so far.
>You had perfect weather, a warming environment, plenty of helping hooves, and a surprisingly good night's sleep.
>All the stallions, and some mares, hogged the 'caterors' last night so you didn't get your pick.
>I mean you didn't get bothered even once by those outfits which ran all along their docks and made that little indent on their...
>You had a good night's rest.
>Now that Saitama was acquainted as well, you had a pretty solid schedule ready for the day.
>He may have been full of surprises, but what else could he possibly do now?
>Other than his strength and speed, he seemed pretty normal.
>You didn't sense magic or anything on him, no more than you expected from any normal pony at least.
>At this point you're sure Princess Celestia working at The Mare's embrace wouldn't even shock you that much.
>Mostly because it has been in your fanfi- I mean your planning guide!
>B-because you had to be prepared.
>But other than that, there wasn't a lot of trouble he could do on his own.
>After you got everything going here you'd accompany him on the train to Canterlot.
>Cut and dry!
>Ah, and wouldn't you know it, there he iiiii-wwwwHAT IS THAT THING?!
Is One Punch man worth watching?

Or reading? This thread has me interested now.
I can confirm as a skeptic that it is indeed worth watching/reading.

It's mostly an action filled comedy. The author loves building complex plot scenarios, only for Saitama to come in and tear it to pieces in an instant. If you don't like reaction comedy, it might not be for you, but I still recommend taking a peek.
I love reaction comedy.
I recommend reading the manga then. The reactions are spectacularly detailed.

>What happened to Pinkie?!
"Are you kidding me? It hasn't even been 12 hours yet and somepony's already dead?!"
>With a furious shake of his head Saitama was quick to ease your worries.
>"What?! No! No, she's not dead! S-she's just unconscious!"
>You didn't even give Pinkie a construction job, you gave her clean-up duty!
"And how could she fall unconscious? Didn't she have safety gear?"
>Saitama stuttered for a moment before nudging his...his 'thing' and whispering.
>Apparently he thought you were deaf.
>"G...Genos, say something."
>It had a name?
>It could talk?!
>"Right, Magic. Anyways, listen."
>You moved to interrupt him.
>To say something.
>But words just started dying in your throat before you could think.
"...You know what? I'm all ears. Lemme take that."
>Your horn idly began to glow as you levitated Pinkie's 'napping' form off to the side on a porch under the shade.
>You offered for them to also sit with you there.
>Stupid weather.
>You're a hypocrite, so what?
"Okay so, um...Saitama, who is your ffffffrieeend?"
>It has never been harder to say that word.
>"Ah, this is Genos! He's pretty cool. I met him during a mosquito infestation, and we've just sorta hung out since then."
>You know, if he hadn't clarified, you would've thought they met in the depths of Tartarus, or maybe in the 5th Dimension.
>Either was fitting at this point.
>"It's nice to meet you...Miss...Twilight. I am Genos, the Blond Cyborg, S-Class. I study under Saitama Sensei's Tutelage and follow him wherever he needs me."
"Sweet Celestia, Genos. Did you just say 'Sensei'?"
>That was Japoneighse if you remember.
>It meant Teacher, didn't it?
>"Yes, that is correct."
>You turned your eyes to Saitama himself who looks as perturbed as you are.
>"D-don't look at me, I didn't tell him to do it..."
>First your castle.
>Then your friend.
>Now your sense of security.
>You could only imagine a Dojo being taught by this stal- er, Man.
>Absolute Chao-
>First your castle.
>Then your friend.
>Now your sense of security.
Shes going to crack I just know it!
So can we fuck now?
> Absolute Chao-
Ho boy, i sense discord coming. Or saitama trying to explain that he is not a sensei

"...Saitama, we're going to the station."
>You didn't even wait, you charged up your horn then and there and the last thing those two saw was a bright flash.

>Moments after your disappearance, Pinkie began to wake up.
>She lifted her head and tried to shake off the aching in the back of her skull.
>Did she fall...?
>Eh, oh well.
>She had to get back to work!
"I should be careful to get more sleep at night! I mean, all that sugar probably keeps me up, but that was the first time I've ever fallen asleep on the job! I hope I'm okay, maybe I should go see the doct- Oof!"
>Halfway through her trot back to her post she bumped into...something.
>The figure was cloaked and she couldn't quite see any details.
"Hi there! Welcome to Ponyville! I'm Pinkie Pie!"
>Well she couldn't just not give her usual introduction, now could she?
>"Hello, little pony. I'm looking for someone..."

>Meanwhile, inside the armored dome of Saitama.
>Wow that was bright.
>Also this was not ponyville.
>Genos was still here with you, looking around dazedly with his fists out and ready for a fight.
>And on the floor panting was Twilight who looked like she just did your training regimen.
"Uh, Twilight? You alright?"
>Genos quickly turned towards the pony, but you held his arm back until he got his bearings again.
>As twilight rose to her hooves, she almost seemed ready to collapse again.
>"You...are really hard...to teleport."
>..That wasn't a fat joke, was it?
>I mean you still exercised...
"Wait, where'd you- Oh..."
>The train station.
>That's right, you still had to go get your stipend, and your citizenship.
>But mostly your stipend.
>"Alright, well, let's get going. The sooner we get there the sooner I can wrap my hooves around his throat and squeeze an-"
>Catching herself, she coughed into her hoof and tried to plaster a small smile onto her face.
>Silly Pony.
Um... Not to be paranoid or anything, but what if the thread well, you know... reached the limits?
Would you make a new one or would we have to?
and what would we call it?
One Punch Thread: The Thread That Will Casually Pierce the Heavens Edition
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Please let this be the name
>this fucking thread

We need a drawfag. Even a shitty one would fit with the original style of the webcomic
What have I created? Also, incoming slower periods. Slow story intermissions, and also doing a side thing or two. I don't promise much tonight, but tomorrow will be pretty much a whole day to myself.


>The ride to follow was nothing too special.
>You and Genos mostly sat in silence while listening to Twilight talk casually about the repairs.
>You're glad things are going smoothly at least.
>Last night you felt an almost obnoxious presence before you went to bed but you thought nothing of it.
>You didn't really expect all that much to come from this world to be quite honest.
>Luna was pretty strong, but far from the most dangerous beings you've met.
>You feel that even Genos might have been able to give her a run for her money.
>Money you still didn't have.
>You wonder if you can charge ponies to see the world's first Cyborg?
>Giving children rides on the rocket propelled human was both an irresponsible and somehow great idea.
"Genos, I have a question."
>Twilight might have been talking before you interrupted, but you don't remember.
>"Yes, Sensei?"
"You said you came here pretty much in a panic, right?"
>He gave a simple nod of the head, as stone-cold as ever.
>"That is correct."
"And you said you don't know if we have a way to get back home, right?"
>Now here's the kicker.
"So what happens if you break your parts?"
>A grin reaches his face as he closes his eyes in sureness.
>"I learned much about my own machinery from the doctor, I am fully capable of maintenance so I was not worried about coming here."
"But this world doesn't have cybernetics or a lab."
>Come to think of it, you still didn't have your TV.
>"I have a problem..."
>Baby steps, Genos.
>Baby steps.
>Candy-trot, as you're sure you were told, was only a couple hours away by train, so it wasn't too long of listening to Genos sulk through all his paranoid misgivings about his 'intolerable behavior'.
>but tomorrow will be pretty much a whole day to myself.
W-w-w-w--w-w-w-w-w-w--when wi-wi-ill you come back?!
>but tomorrow will be pretty much a whole day to myself.

To clarify, does that mean more green or less green?
Less green today, unfortunately. But tomorrow, yeah, I'll have time to kick back and write. I've had a fucky sleep schedule lately, due to staying up late to work on things and then like today I basically wake up into trouble. I'd feel bad writing too much while not in the best state of mind, so I'll probably leave off here soon. Like I said, I have story plans coming, and these slightly more simple posts are fine to go through.
best show
please pastebin this. this is fucking gold. Oh man i can't wait until some overpowered villain fuckboy comes in and Saitama just casually bitch-slaps them into a shower of red.
I was just getting ready to go for the night, I think these last couple posts should be fine but I guess I'll throw them in the pastebin. Thought I could push for more but I decided not to risk it. There are a few links around but I got all this stored.

Apologies for not a big update today, there will be times like that. Here, have a loveable gif.
I don't have a problem with it, I just found this thread.
Read all that shit in 20 minutes.
oh someone please pastebin this or save it. it's glorious and just full of greatness.
stupid cunt thinks everyone she meets is a jerk. autistic shit biscuit
Bump to save
This thread... the fuck is Saitama? Unreadable if you don't know. 1/10 would not fuck
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This, yes.

Also, bumping for Sensei.
Then read or watch One Punch Man you fucking clod.

Full version 4u
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You better shut that fucking whore mouth of yours
It isn't that hard to use google.

Also bump.
fuggen Genos, man
also bump for moar green
One Bump Anon

>Sweet Merciful heavens though, batman.
>No, literally.
>This place was Sweet Merciful Heavens.
>You had to cover your eyes from the sheer glow of the pastel colored buildings.
>But even more strange than that...
>The ponies here had clothing.
>Clothes have never looked more awkward in your life.
>"Wait...if the ponies here are all dressed, then why is Ponyville...oh, oh!"
>Now Genos was starting to think like you.
>"M-miss Twilight, I was unaware that was your thing, but don't you think...?"
>Alright, sometimes having Genos around was pretty great.
>"It's...it's not like that...
>Twilight's cheeks burned the brightest red in the light, lowering her head beneath her bangs as she lead the two of you towards the tall castle in the mountain.
>Okay first of all you're pretty sure that's not how that works.
>Secondly, you didn't actually notice that castle until Twilight pointed it out.
>You were about to just hoof it, *snicker*, and see where it took you.
>Looking around, it was actually quite interesting to view the variety in the ponies themselves.
>Some were green, some where blue, some were white or pink.
>You were always one for Yellow, honestly.
>But you hadn't seen a single yellow pony this whole time.
>Though one pattern you were noticing was those little things on their butts.
>You tried not to stare but they were so strange.
>Little marks with different pictures and objects on them.
"Twilight..? Why do the ponies have Tattoos on their asses?"
>With a gasp, she hopped and smiled, trotting to your side with fascination in her eyes.
>"I'm glad you asked! Those are cutie marks!"
>Genos practically became your second consciousness.
>"Ah, back home we call those tramp stamps, I believe."
>Twilight wasn't having any of that.
>...Wait did that mean they 'did' have-
>"NO! These are manifestations of a pony's special talents!"
>"Exactly what I said."

>Twilight flew right up into Genos' face with an adorably upset expression.
>"Listen, Mister! You can make your jokes now but you better can that attitude when we get to the castle!"
>Heh, Can, Genos.
"Look, we're just here for this 'evaluation' thing so I doubt it's a formal deal. Look, we promise not to burn the place down, right Genos?"
>Why did he turn his head away from you two?
>"I promise a 77% chance that fire will not be involved."
>Perfectly reasonable.
"See? We'll be fine."
>Why did she have to look so defeated?
"Aaaaanyways, about those tramp st-"
>"Cutie Marks."
"Same thing. What 'are' they exactly, other than being...what's the word?"
>Lifting a finger, Genos did his duty as your oversized dictionary.
>"Precariously placed, Sensei."
>Good boy.
>You would've expected Twilight to be offended by that too, honestly.
>I mean, it's just in such a weird location.
>"You mean you don't have any indicator of your kind's special talents?"
>Come on, Twilight, you can do it.
"N-no, we do, like our heroes have names given to them about what their abilities are but we don't have to stare at each other's..."
>A tilt of her head.
"You know, it's so close to the..."
>"It is potentially problematic to peek at people's posteriors without permission is what Sensei is perhaps attempting to portray. Possibly."
"Was that really necessary?"
>Putting his fingers to his chin in a thoughtful manner, you heard his particularly calculating tone.
>Puh puh puh.
>"Well I had analyzed that Miss Sparkle has an affinity for advanced knowledge and so use of literary rhetoric would likely get the message through simpler."
>You would've argued that such a thing seemed ridiculous but you were too distracted by Twilight's sparkling eyes staring Genos up and down.
"Ah...heh, looks like you've got a fanmare now."
>"Do you by chance, eheh, read Prancing's Alminac of Alliteration Actuation?"

>"An Alminac is a book of information, Miss Twilight, involving farming knowledge and weather patterns. But I have read many books in my world that follow a similar cosmic interpretation involving such Equine pun as 'Prancing'."
>You could see the interest rising in Twilight's expression...
>"Ohhh, you're good. Yes, it's not a fitting name necessarily, but by all means it's an interesting read! It even includes knowledge of the neurological reactions to alliteration in speech!"
>"Pattern recognition in sapient species is perhaps the most well known aspect of our self-study research programs in our world. Though I am not the most...well acquainted with using words as a means of interaction. In fact, before meeting Saitama Sensei, usually my first words were 'Preparing to eliminate Target'."
>You were trying to mention the onlookers staring at the two of them spouting all this stuff you didn't really understand...
>"Ah! Oh my gosh, I was just like that! I used to be such a recluse that all I cared about was actions and getting results that I never even CONSIDERED getting out and making friends or anything! Wow, this is so interesting!"
>"I'm a cyborg in another universe!"
>The ground beneath you cracked as you took a stance and put your hands to the side of your mouths like a funnel.
>A furious wind lifted many a dress and tarnished the hair of those who were too close for their own good.
"Oh, I thought those buildings would've been a bit tougher than that."
>All you did was yell...
>Twilight's jaw hung wide open as she looked upon the mess you made, a stray top hat having landed squarely on her nogging.
>"Sensei, I think it is time to go."
"Would you look at that? You're right."
>Taking a look at the watch you didn't have, it was precisely 'Leave'.
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>"I promise a 77% chance that fire will not be involved."

>Putting an arm around Twilight's neck, you began to lead her off to another random direction.
>Just anywhere but here was where you were needed.
>But sometimes that didn't always work.
>"HOLD IT right there, you rapscallions!"
>Turning your head towards the sound, you saw a rather tall pony with a styled up red mane, his fur a steep and charming silver.
>He was rather large all around, with the tiniest traces of a moustache on his face.
>This one actually wore pants, thankfully, which was good because he was standing on two legs and posing.
>You would've admired the way he captured the light, but in your eyes he was still a pony and that did not give you the sense of admiration he was looking for.
>Though you guess the same couldn't be said for the surrounding groups.
>"Oh Celestia, it's this guy..."
"You know this one, Twilight?"
>She gave the faintest of nods, her hoof in her eyes whilst taking deep breaths.
>"YES! It is I, Gleaming Horn! Front line fighter of the Canterlot civil defense services!"
>Twilight was quick to correct him.
>"He's basically a mall cop."
"Ah, that makes sense."
>The stallion posing before you in the distance was practically popping a vein at the interruption.
>"...ANYWAYS! It must have been you who made that noise, and what a mess you've caused!"
>Sticking out his hoof to point at you, he kept his muzzle high in the air.
>These ponies could be pretty cute at times.
>"Such transgressions will not go lightly! I, Gleaming Horn, will bring you to justice with my unmatched magical combat technique!"
>The air around him shimmered and glowed until it soon burst with radiating magic.
>That's when Genos' eyes lit up with scanner systems.
>"Sensei, he is gathering a noteable energy signature. Stand back, I will-"
>The surprise on his face soon turned to a quizzical grimace.
>Always trying to see what your tricks were.
>Even Twilight seemed panicked by the situation.
"I know what I'm doing."

>Pebbles near the hooves of the stallion lift into the air from the pressure being exerted.
>All the while his horn began to blaze with a strong red aura.
>You've never faced magic directly up front.
>You were curious.
>"Saitama, this is seriously no time to just be an airhead! I'll put up a shiel- Huh?!"
>She moves to dash in front of you but you slip your leg out to trip her and gently send her to the ground.
>The rim of the hat happened to cover her eyes for what happened next.
>With a bright flash the stallion charged with you surprising speed.
>Halfway through the charge a large translucent point emerged from his horn like a polearm.
>"Million Bit Cleave!"
>You weren't sure if he intended to incapacitate you or straight up kill you.
>You weren't even sure if it mattered which.
>A wind tunnel formed behind him as he charged.
>The speed behind the attack itself was the kicker.
>He assumed you wouldn't even be able to keep up with him.
>When he finally reached you, horn poised to rip right into your neck, you had already seen right through him.
>Like glass, his aura shattered once it attempted to slice at your skull.
>In the light, his eyes met yours as time almost seemed to slow down.
>And he saw the true face of destruction.
>With a bored, half-lidded gaze.
>Then he met your fist.
>A quick swipe gave him a backhanded surprise which sent him barreling into the collapsed buildings fast enough to cut a hole in the sound barrier.
>Welp, looks like magic didn't do it either.

>Be Twilight for a moment.
>Be burdened by great hat fashion.
>You don't even know when this hat got atop your head but you couldn't see jack with it on.
>Stumbling to your feet, you pull it clean off only to have a face full of wind blowing fiercely past you.
>And a cloud of dust enveloped the area.
>...Where did that pony go?
>Also you don't remember the houses looking THAT torn up.
>"Oh man, would you look at that? He slipped and went right into those buildings."

>You do a double take towards the buildings and Saitama, then at the ground.
>You could see the trail of rubble from where the stallion had charged towards Saitama.
>Everypony seemed to be looking towards the debris off to the side whilst whispering among themselves.
>They believed it.
>But you could see a perfect 90 degree bend in the direction of the trail right in front of Saitama.
>Surely nopony could be that oblivi-
>"Woah! Did he really miss that?!"
>"He's doing the real damage here!"
>"Is he okay?"
>Oh right, Canterlot...

>Be Saitama.
>And you're an evil genius.
>Nobody would suspect a thing.
"Come on, we'd better let the cops or whoever take care of this. This mess that stallion caused."
>And you were outta there, a hand around both of your companions to signal that this was no longer you're problem.
>Canterlot Castle, here you came!
>"Saitama, this is the wrong direction...Canterlot castle is up there."
>With a nod to your right, you note that the mountain is in fact over there.
"Twilight...the wrong direction is simply the one you don't believe in."
>"Sensei, that's the lesson you gave me when we got lost in City A..."
>Uh, um...
"So, about those cutie marks..."

>10 minutes later near the scene of the 'crime', a stallion is being hauled off to the medical cart, a twitch in his hooves.
>The guard had approached to the scene of the collapsing homes which thankfully were empty at the time.
>It's a scene which brings a sense of confusion to the populace.
>But amidst the chaos there is one voice which echoes a tone most pleased.
>"What do we have here? This might come in handy...Muhahahaha..."
>>And he saw the true face of destruction.
>>With a bored, half-lidded gaze.
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>"Come on, we'd better let the cops or whoever take care of this. This mess that stallion caused."
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im waiting like pic related

"But doesn't that mean you could have a talent you don't enjoy at all?"
>"Look, Saitama, I know you say a lot of crazy things but is this really necessary?"
>Twilight finally managed to get you two to the front gates, after having explained the backwards ass mechanics behind magical fate theory.
>"We're here you two, now I want you on your best behavior. As forgiving as Luna and Celestia can be, directly disrespecting them is still...disrespectful!"
>You don't say?
>You suppose for a little bit you can try to put on a good image.
>After all this was your paycheck.
>"Just follow me, the throne room is directly ahead. It'll be a short walk."
>You were too busy looking around the place to reply directly so you simply gave a small nod.
"This place is built so cleanly. Isn't it supposed to be old?"
>You could see your reflection in the floor tiles!
>And then the reflection of that on your...
>"Why yes! The castle itself was built at least a few hundred years ago, and serves as a monument to the triumph of the sun! But also a memorial of a fateful event. It's cleaned regularly."
>Hmm, wait, but that wasn't 'that' old for a castle.
"Isn't Celestia thousands of years old?"
>Twilight's pace slows slightly as worry takes her expression.
>"That might be a story best saved for Celestia herself to tell you. From the viewpoint of both her student and her friend, it wouldn't feel right telling the story to you myself."
>Well that sounded ominous.
>Not a very shining example for the sun.
>Heh, you'd have to use that one.
>Could use a little work though.
>"Here we are. Celestia should be holding day court, but we can stop in real quickly."
>The guards noted Twilight's appearance, and stood at attention.
>"Princess Twilight, excuse us, but please identify your companions."
>Twilight wore a simple smile and spread her wings regally, clearing her throat.
>"I bring with me two heroes from another realm. Genos, a high class warrior, and Saitama."
>...That all?

>Yeah, okay, sure.
>Have your fun now sparkle butt.
>At least the guards seemed to nod their heads, parting from the door to let them open.
>...To the rather humorous sight of the Princess with a pleasant smile on her face, eyes closed.
>All the while some noble seemed to be spouting on about some kind of a problem or...something.
>You really weren't listening, so you just pretended they were whinnies and neighs.
>Of course as the door closed behind you three, her eyes slowly opened and her expression brightened.
>Man, you were full of jokes today.
>"Twilight! Ah, *ahem*, court is closed for the time being due to political concerns. Dismissed."
>The stallion in the row froze, wide eyed, before he coughed into his hoof and departed with a frustrated frown.
>"My guard, you may depart for now, we will be fine."
>With a salute and a swift 'Yes, Princess', the armored ponies also left in unison leaving you three and the Princess alone.
>That's when Celestia stepped off her throne and began to stretch almost uncharacteristically.
>She took her time and seemed anything but professional.
"So this is your leader?"
>Twilight chose not to answer that one, but Celestia herself was happy to.
>"I am Celestia, yes. I am the co-ruler of Equestria, and it is nice to see you two again."
>Two meaning that she had to take a second to realize you had a friend.
>"And one more, I see. Greetings to you, young man."
>Genos in turn straightened his shoulders, and spoke.
>"Thank you, Ma'am. My name is Genos, I am a student of Saitama's. Excuse me for appearing un-invited."
>Celestia shot the same glance to you that Twilight did, despite the smile.
>It...it wasn't 'that' hard to believe, was it?
>"Well, Genos...it is no problem at all. Please don't feel out of place. Anyone Twilight trusts, I trust as well."
"What if she trusted a bad guy?"
>"Then I'd be sure to have a room in the psyche evaluation wing ready for her."

>Twilight, coughing into her hoof at the odd implications, stepped forward.
>"Um, Princess? With all due respect, I was actually wondering if you could answer something for me."
>Celestia looked to her student, her smile left for a curious stare.
>"Well, you see, I was wondering if you knew where Discord was. I didn't notice until just a bit ago but he was nowhere around ponyville, and he's ALWAYS with Fluttershy."
>"I just have this feeling he's...involved in the appearance of these two."
>Celestia's eyes widened and soon her hoof met her face when realization started to dawn on her as well.
>Whoever this Discord guy was, you could tell he was gonna be fun.
>"That explains a few things. Firstly, Discord has decided to take residence here in the castle since yesterday morning. I figured he just had a falling out with Fluttershy. He was more serious than usual."
>You could at least take from the tone of her voice that this was concerning.
>"I can take you to him before we begin, but you know he can be difficult to reason with."
>Twilight's eyes met the ground, all the while you and Genos simply looked at one another.
>Softly, you leaned over and whispered.
"Does it feel like we're being left out to you?"
>"I believe it's simply that there's an over-arching story here that we're not meant to fit into."
>Something about what Genos just said felt a little meta to you.
>But you suppose that wasn't important right now.
>Celestia turned towards an entrance at the side of the room and began to walk, beckoning you all to follow.
>"He's just beyond here in our gallery, which thankfully is unharmed. But that honestly concerns me more."
>She led you through to hallway after hallway, until finding an enormous Atrium of sorts that was filled with plantlife and statues.
>You could see rooms branching off everywhere, and you were curious what was beyond here.
>You could even see light through the ceiling windows.
"But why is this place empty...?"

>A hoof pointed outward led your eyes directly towards a figure near the center of the large room, whose face you couldn't see.
>Only a long, serpentine body trailing along a large couch turned away from the group.
>"Oh it's so nice to finally have some company! Please, take a seat, everyone relax!"
>A bird-like claw raised over the edge of the red velvet, snapping like fingers.
>As if on command, the couch began to spin swiftly like a cartoon, stopping to show what you could only assume to be Discord staring at you all.
>"This stuff is really just divine, please! Kick back, introduce me to your guests!"
>Chairs floated and arranged into a half circle before him, almost like book clubs in high school.
>When the teacher always got the nicest chair.
>All with a snap of his...paw?
>Wait, let's take another look at this thing.
>Yep, not a single of those parts belonged where it was.
>That confused you for a second...
>Oh well.
>"Discord, with all due respect, I think you have some explaining to do."
>Celestia didn't sound too happy, but at least she was being calm.
>Discord was preparing for some sort of reply but Twilight on the other hand wasn't waiting.
>"Whatever you did, you'd better have a way to send these two back!"
>Well, good job not wasting any time there, Sparkle.
>But you're not so sure Discord has the look of evil on his face.
>It was more like a confused look.
>"Twilight, allow me. Discord, I was wondering why you've been absent from Ponyville and instead resided here. Now I see you've been up to some trouble, haven't you?"
>Looking between you and Genos, Discord himself seemed mostly uninterested in the who, but rather the 'what'.
>"I see, so 'that' is what I sensed yesterday..."
>"So you admit you have some role to play in this game, Discord?"
>Taking off from the couch, the lizard-something whatever floated into the air as the furniture lifted and circled him.
>"Nope, wasn't me, oh but I do love guessing games."
(When'd it get so quiet? You know you're allowed to post, right?)

>It was gonna be one of 'these' discussions, wasn't it?
>Celestia stepped forward, her horn glowing as the chairs all disappeared from Discord's manipulation and appeared back in their respective places.
>Discord certainly seemed a little bothered by that.
>"Look, Discord, we've been through this charade time and time again. I'm in no way believing that you're not reformed, however you can't go around causing trouble like this."
>Discord sat up, his once annoyed expression morphing, literally, into a hurt look.
>"Why do you all assume my behavior is indicative of some kind of game?! I'm here because I'm trying to help you. This is truly my first meeting with these two, um...'fine gentlemen' here."
>Pointing daintily towards you and Genos, he puts on an obviously fake smile.
>"You've got it all wrong, Celestia you old coot. I'm here as a warning."
>You really were lost on this conversation, but you're pretty sure it was starting to get intense.
>"Warning...? Discord, what do you know?"
>You were largely not paying attention to what was actually happening.
>But these were some pretty statues.
>"Ah-ah-ah, patience my dear. I can't say exactly what's going to happen. Mostly because even I don't know. All I can tell you is that things far beyond even my time and comprehension are unveiling. And I'm afraid I won't be of any use."
>Before Celestia or Twilight could seemingly get another word in, however, another snap of Discord's fingers made a door appear out of thin air 'into' thin air.
>"My presence here will only distract you all. I've already given my two bits, but I will say this..."
>Opening the door itself, the frame was just for show, as it just lead to nowhere.
>"I hope you've got really good history books, Twilight. Because from this point forward, we're all in the dark. The only place left to look is back."
>And like that, he closed the door, which disappeared in a flash.
I'm here, just reading.
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this is us waiting for green
We're all waiting for that green m8.

>Twilight ran forward to try and catch him, but much to your surprise he was gone with the door.
>She merely stumbled to the ground, reaching for thin air.
>Meanwhile, you and Genos exchanged words.
"Do you follow all of this?"
>"Not even a little, Sensei."
>Riveting conversation.
>Celestia appears to be in deep thought over this, as if trying to track a certain thought or memory.
>Twilight approaches her, rubbing her muzzle where he hit the floor.
>"Princess, what 'was' that? He genuinely seemed to not know what we meant."
>Celestia in turn gives her head a subtle shake.
>You can tell that there's actually an air of concern around them.
>"I'm unsure, Twilight. But whatever it is, Discord's advice might be worth listening to. If something really is going on, perhaps you should go and see your friends. Just to be safe, it might be smart to have the elements together."
>A warm smile came over Celestia as she comfortingly brushed her student's mane.
>It was obvious she cared greatly for her student.
>Your look became a bit more nervous as you turned your eyes...
>And saw Genos staring at you.
"Yeah, don't even dare ask."
>Oblivious to your and Genos' scene, Celestia beckoned towards the hallway.
>"Saitama, I would be glad to show you towards where your evaluations will take place. As for you, Twilight, you should probably move for the train before it takes off."
>She turned her head towards Genos, her eyes softly apologizing for her coming inconvenience.
>"Just to be safe, Genos, would you mind accompanying Twilight? From the sounds of it, you're quite strong and should something happen it would put me at ease."
>Genos turned his eyes to you for an answer, obviously not sure if it was okay.
>You just smiled and waved your hand, not wanting to make this a big deal.
"Go on ahead, I'm sure I'll be back before the day's end."
>Hesitation was evident in his form, still.
>"Ah, yes, Sensei?"
>This is where you give him your serious look.

"This is a mission to protect a royal entourage in a time of concern. As your teacher, I'm entrusting you with this task to ensure that no harm come to Twilight or her friends. I'm sure I can count on you, to succeed and grow."
>You could almost see the light shining in his eyes.
>The glimmer of realization and that slack jawed face of awe.
>Hook, line, and sinker.
>You swore he was gonna cry from his reaction.
>"Yes, Sensei!"
>He turned in place, giving a cordial salute to Celestia before speaking with more rigor than before.
>"Miss Twilight, if you would please, we can make haste before the next train leaves!"
>Celestia obviously found the scene humorous, though with a tinge of 'sure that works'.
>Twilight gave one last look to her teacher, shrugging off the embarrassment, before beginning to walking by Genos' side.
>"Very well, lead the way. Might as well go sooner than later."
>With the word go, Genos soon began to exit to the halls, traveling the same path back as you had entered.
>He was a good kid.
"Ah, but big matters come first. Where do I get my paycheck?"
>If Celestia hadn't seen that coming, she'd have to be blind.
>You could hear her give a rather audible laugh, which you returned with a smile.
>"Come with me, I will show you to the chambers. We will be sure to find your ability to reason, your IQ, defensive capabilities, the usual."
>Were your last words before the door closed behind you.

>Out in Ponyville, however...
>A familiar shadow approached it's town square.
>The ponies had all be rigorously working under Luna's guidance to rebuild the mess from her backfire.
>But she had had to depart back to Canterlot.
>That was, thankfully, after Twilight's castle had been repaired nicely with Magic.
>Mostly, at least.
>But the magic would help the crystals heal with due time.
>She instisted she finish the rest of the work herself but the elements had told her she didn't need to bother.
>The hard work brought them closer.
>For now.
>"What if she trusted a bad guy?"
>>"Then I'd be sure to have a room in the psyche evaluation wing ready for her."
I'm really starting to love your Celestia.

Like a lot.

>Piles of rubble were stacked to be carried off by carts once they were loaded by unicorn.
>It was only out of the corner of her eye that Applejack had seen the figure standing at the top of one of those piles.
>His finger was blackened by the sunlight, but it was something bipedal.
>And it spoke loud enough for all to hear.
>"Which of you are the Elements of Harmony?"
>Wiping her brow of sweat, Applejack dawned her hat before approaching.
>"Well hey there, ah wouldn't stand there if ah were you. It's dangerous ta be bah the rubble! You a newcomer?"
>She couldn't tell from sight alone, but she thought it looked towards her.
>It had a masculine voice, smooth as it was.
>Some kind of fancy robe.
>It kinda gave her a bad vibe, but she was a tough girl.
>She wasn't afraid of a new fella, and it was rude to judge by appearances.
>"Y'all wanna come down from there? Ya look mighty intimidatin' but don't wanna hurt yourself, do ya?"
>His only response was to leap high into the air, flying overhead of Applejack, and landing in the town center with a thud.
>The ground dug itself up under the pressure, as the figure slowly rose.
>It was definitely not pony, that's for sure.
>"Please do not worry about me, I will be fine. In fact..."
>Turning it's head, AppleJack's eyes shrank when she realized that darkness wasn't the sunlight.
>She couldn't see a face, or eyes.
>Just the faint glow of something...'red' pulsing along his 'skin'.
>"I doubt I can be hurt at all."
>It was like this creature's skin was a void in itself, with only the glow of redness beyond a shadowy veil.
>It had 'hair' of some kind, atop it's head like normal, hanging long down one side of it's head, and underneath the robe she spotted pieces of armor...connected to him.
>"W...well, u-uh, forgive me fer sayin' this but you ain't exactly comin' off real friendly lahk."
>At this point some of the others had joined the scene as well.
>"Really? Perhaps it's because...I'm not friendly."

"This is bad..."
>"Saitama, Please, it's just a test."
"You'll see when my results come back..."
>Just moments ago you begrudgingly turned in the exam they handed you to be filled out properly.
>Some of it wasn't that bad, simple math, thankfully nothing too high level.
>But then it became more and more complex.
>Literature, Science, and even little bits of Magical theory.
>"LIsten, I told you that your grade on magic won't be tested. Ah, here it comes!"
>Your eyes went wide, biting your lip as a rather...disturbed pony approached with test in hand, delivering it to Celestia before walking off.
>It was clear his day was done, done, done.
>"Now let's see here, the grade you got on your test is...is..."
>She took a moment, face unchanging while running over grades you neither needed nor wanted to see.
>She then folded the paper up, tore it in half with her magic and proceeded to move on.
>"Anyways, what's still important is that you are able to defend yourself. So we shall move on to the next part of this evaluation."
>She was a merciful being.
>You followed after, still a solemn look on your face, before a voice came to you from behind.
>"Ah! Sir Saitama, there you are."
>Oh, wasn't that..
"Luna? Weren't you down at ponyville?"
>Celestia also turned towards the voice, smiling warmly to her sisterly figure.
>"Back so soon? I assume that means reparations in Ponyville are going well?"
>The dark blue moody mare nodded, a faint smile on her lips.
>"Verily. We would've done more but the ponies there were insistent that we get more rest. Lest the night be a little less like home, as the honest one put it."
>Celestia couldn't help but chuckle warmly at the thought, always touched by the innocence of Twilight's friends.
>"We were just about to handle the strength test for Saitama here. I heard of his test of speed from you, so I figured there was no need to try to measure such."
>Please don't ask for your IQ test Luna, please...
>"What about his IQ test?"
RD is new Genos.

>You refused to meet her in the eye at such a traitorous statement.
>"Oh don't worry about that, he did well enough."
>C-class sucked...
>"If you say so, Sister. That usually means average or less, we will believe in Saitama."
>Head hung low, you followed Celestia into another chamber much...different than the others.
>It was dark in here, and the floor was made out of raw stone.
"What in the...where are we?"
>Celestia's answer took the form of her horn glowing brightly, as a light shone from the room's center.
>It was a magnificent display, the ground itself sunk and bent despite being stone, and from it rose a large crystal.
>It was as you expected a traditional crystal to look, with the points on the top and bottom, and for corners in the center.
>It's vibrant sky-blue glow filled the room, and if you looked closely, you could almost see light spiralling inside of it, like it were almost alive.
>"This is the manifest stone. A relic born from the merging of the essence of water with the will of the earth. As it's name implies, it manifests itself based on whatever it comes into contact with."
>Fancy...ritual stuff, as you expected.
"But, what do this have to do with strength testing?"
>Celestia lead you closer to the stone itself.
>"The stone is the essence of water itself, no matter how you interact with it, ancient magics hold it together."
>Turning towards you, she nods her head closer to it.
>"Saitama, please. Give it a good hit."
>Hmm...Well, if that's how it works.
"Alright, here goes nothing..."

>A scream echoes through ponyville, masses try to flee the scene.
>Pillars of blackness rise from the ground, impaling whatever gets in their path.
>Several ponies cry out as dark powers pin them to the ground, loved ones struggling to set them free.
>At the center of the madness, a battle is held, and the odds fall faster and faster.
>The ponies stand, scratched and messy, around a lone figure clad in twisted armor.
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dont you dare leave us in suspense
(Do you guys like Action? Drama? Edge?)

>"Jes'- *pant* Jes' who the hay are ya'?!"
>Applejack shouted, her eyes viciously watching this...this MONSTER.
>It refuses to speak for several moments.
>Then she sees it.
>Something tearing at the front of it's face, stretching it.
>Drooling it's wretched juices onto the floor, it glows.
>She watches an eye split into existence, watching her.
>And then another...
>And more until this mess of a creature is watching each and every one of them at once.
>Then like that they sink back into it until one big eye remains to watch her.
>"I...am the shadow of my lord. The essence of his eternal disgust given form. Ripped from his being, to spread his darkness across the land. I am all that had lurked beneath this world for time immemorial. You may call me Alvior, The eye of darkness."
>It's 'cloak' lifted into the air, stretching and morphing until it form an arch behind his body, forming ritualistic rings with strange symbols on them.
>They glowed softly before all forming in together, like a syringe, shooting into his back.
>"But for you especially."
>He vanished.
>And the town center desintigrated.
>Where did this fist come from...?
>"I am death."

>The mix of a cry of pain and the echoes of glass shattering filled the chamber.
>Where there was once some special, magical crystal...
>There was now a pool of water.
"Ah, um...it broke. Sorry."
>The only thing to change from Celestia's smiling face would've been the way her eyes bulged nearly out of their sockets.
>Then it slowly came to her fully.
>"T...thousands of years of study and testing...the invincible Manifest stone..."
>Looking down at your first, you realize your hand and sleeve were wet now.
>Aw man, you hoped it was just normal water.
"Well, does that give you the results you wanted?"
>"...More than enough."
>Well, no skin off your bones.
"You can just, like...make another one, right?"
>"I...sure, let's go with that."
Action? Drama? Edge? how about all three put together, but separated into little squares then kneaded to perfection?
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>>The only thing to change from Celestia's smiling face would've been the way her eyes bulged nearly out of their sockets.
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>Saitama is about to beat the shit out of somebody rigth now
Yeah well. That's what pushing you down the stairs will do

>You are now Genos.
>Protector of Royalty.
>Bearer of your Master's name.
>Rising hero of the people!
>You were-
"Yes, my liege!?"
>"Sweet Luna, calm down!"
>Ah, that's true...
>Your servos were heating up.
>"Listen, I know this must be important to you, but I trust you. There's no need to get so worked up. Besides, whatever Discord saw, what trouble could come literally this far out of nowhere?"
>Well, she had a point...
>You didn't even know that 'Discord' person.
>He could've been lying, or stretching the truth at least.
>Still, this was not for his sake.
>This was a direct order from your teacher, and that meant there was value in something even as simple as this.
"Even so, there is nothing wrong with a little caution. Even something as simple as a bandit attack would be worth the preparations."
>Twilight rolled her eyes playfully, giving a little mock scoff at you, which you returned with a little smile.
>"Bandit attack, right. We're already almost to Ponyville, you can hardly hear the train from Canterlot at this point. Who would even know we're here? I'd like to see those bandits, hehe!"
>An explosion erupted far below in a chasm that ran beneath the tracks.
>The explosion caused an avalanche of the terrain behind the train itself, ripping the tracks apart and creating a gap too big to cross even with a great leap.
"I have a feeling you really wouldn't..."
>The train was forced to come to a stop as the weight of it's carriages pulled towards the hole pulled it down.
>You could hear the screams of ponies and other kind alike as they were being pulled towards an untimely death in their metal prisons.
"Twilight, get out of here!"
>You yell quickly before standing, rearing back, and swinging forward to bust a whole through the side of the cart and leap out.
>It's a mad dash toward the front of the train, and you see Twilight leaping out, flying by your side.
>"Genos! What are you doing?!"
"Being a Hero!"

>Reaching the front car through the debris of tracks flying everywhere, you jump and land at the front of the car which was trying it's damndest to keep moving.
>Your arms come to life, glowing with heat once you rip into the front bracer of the train itself and get a good grip.
>Digging your heels into the ground as firmly as you can, you pull.
>The train screeches once you've helped anchor it, though this pressure on your body was immense.
"Nnngh! Twilight! Try to help the survivors back to safety!"
>Damn it, now sadly wasn't the time to hold faith in good will.
"Please, go!"
>She doesn't take much longer to reason with, and flies off towards the dangling edge of the train with great speed.
>Then you hear something...
>A screech.
>Turning your head just in time, you watch as some 'sort of monster lands behind you.
>A large wyvern-like creature, scaled with large wings and hand-like claws.
>Only instead of a head, it was really more like one giant mouth.
>No eyes or facial features, just a large jaw on elongated neck.
>It's lower jaw at the end was raw bone, split down the middle to open wide.
"What in the hell?!"
>Another screech ripped from it's form as it reared it's arm back and swung, smashing you in the side and sending you flying off.
>You caught yourself halfway, and prepared to launch for a counter-attack.
>That thing was trying to knock the train back of the edge.
>You didn't have the time to fight that thing.
>Damn it!
>You had to either stop the train from falling, or stop this thing from killing everyone; Including you.
>You could see her guiding other fliers out of the train, but you know it would still take time.
>And if those cars fell, they wouldn't even have a chance at escaping.
>You had to do SOMETHING!
>This train was...coal powered?
>Well, there's always an idea.
"Alright, but first, I'll have to pay you back."
>Throwers at the ready.

>Flying high above the monster which was fighting the train's forward momentum, you raised your leg high.
>Using your thruster, you spiralled down towards this thing, the earth quickly coming towards you.
>Moments before your kick unearthed the ground below, it leaped out of the way, back further along the tracks.
>You jumped, throwing yourself back through the front window to the conductor's car, where the engine roared with fire.
>"W-w-who are you?!"
"No time, run. NOW!"
>With a shout of terror, said stallion practically tossed himself out of the car along with the escaping ponies.
>It was now or never.
>The beast crawled closer, as if challenging you head on.
>You pulled your arms back and took a deep breath, thrusting your palms out while your systems roared to life.
>The car erupted in fire as you blew the engine clean away, surely destroying it from all the fire but also giving it one last good push.
>The wheels took off at turbo speed, suddenly lunging forward with a renewed vigor.
>It pulled up one car, then another, getting progressively faster and stronger as the weight evened out until began to barrel forwards, no tracks to guide it.
>It tackled the monster head on.
>Both you and the monster flew back from the impact, smoke clouds filling the air as the train landed, conveniently, at the station of ponyville, spattered in weird blood from front to back.
>It was only a little crooked.
>Twilight came charging through the door towards where you were, looking at the melted controls and lingering burn marks on the floor.
>She then looked to you, sitting against the wall...
"...All aboard."

>Perspective change to Canterlot.
>Saitama, you, were currently being lead back out to the throne room.
>You weren't entirely sure what that whole deal with the crystal was but you were told that you were fit to battle against just about anything.
>That was 'not' in the least bit informative.
so much green
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It's delicious~

>"By royal decree, I hereby announce you, Saitama, of the 'human' race to be the envoy of your kind. You are to be deemed the Ambassador of your kind."
>Mhm, mhm.
>Still no pay but you're getting there.
>"Of course I know you're also probably eager to know about that Stipend I mentioned."
>Were ponies here just telepathic or something?
>Because that would be convenient and creepy.
>"As dictated by royal law, you will be offered a stipend of 300 bits every month to support yourself. Since tax laws are seperated between different cities and regions, it is the most efficient way to ensure you will put them towards good use."
"Uhuh...but I don't know how much a bit is."
>Celestia gave a slight chuckle, trailing down the aisle of her throne room towards the entrance.
>"Don't worry, I promise you it is more than enough to afford a good bit of land and maintain it. I'm not allowed to go over a limit of that royal coffers, but I make sure to push it as far as I can."
>That was nice of her, honestly.
>You know some people, here and back home, probably wouldn't think the same way.
"Well, until I can figure out what dragged me into this world, it's nice to have friends in higher places."
>Then a voice that wasn't Celestia's.
>"Indeed. A good friend with great power can make all of the difference, Saitama."
>Celestia turned in a panic towards the sound, whilst you simply looked over your shoulder.
>"And I have a very good friend, in a very dark place."
>Seated at the throne, in a mocking fashion, was...a fire?
>A blue flame, Atop a suit of armor.
>Celestia didn't take kindly to this breach.
>"Who are you? Identify yourself."
>Standing slowly with a playful gait, Mr hothead here skipped down the stairs.
>"Ahh, scary, scary, Miss Celestia. What did I do to you? I'm only a messenger, even I don't care about my name."
>Never heard that one before.
>"If you'd like me to leave now, I guess I could. With this valuable knowledge of mine."

Go watch the anime as well. Its amazingly animated by madhouse studios. Only 12 eps tho...

>Celestia stared the flames down, as if hoping to dowse them with her presence.
>But they continued to burn against her will.
>"...*Sigh*. Fine. Make yourself at home. But you WILL tell me this 'message'."
>As if laughing to himself, the fires crackled and grew brighter.
>It must have been entertaining to have the Princess give in.
>"That's better...my message is very simple. It's just an invitation to his return party."
>Like a birthday party or a grand opening party?
"His? Look, would you just get to the point already? We really don't care about this schtick of yours."
>Celestia looked to you, then back to spitfire here.
>"What he said."
>Silence came for a minute...
>"Alright! Fine. I am a dark messenger of his greatness, his utter darkness! The lord of shadow themselves-"
"How are you a dark messenger if your head is so bright? And if he's the lord of shadows, why do his minions light up?"
>Silence once more.
>Except Celestia's faint attempts to restrain laughter.
>"I see...nevertheless! A great shadow looms over Equestria. And a power known only to the ancients rises. Your precious Tree of Harmony won't save your kind any longer, Celestia!"
>Celestia's eyes shrank back as fear welled inside of her.
>Not fear for herself of course but fear for her ponies.
>"What do you mean? What are you talking about?!"
>Ominous laughter rang through the room, obviously a power trip was under way.
>"I wouldn't expect you to remember, Celestia. He was ruling the darkness before you were even born! His name, whispered among the dark, brings fear to all! Dark lord Elethadus."
>As if by magic, the name echoed around both you and Celestia, who had stiffened up in tension.
>You felt absolutely nothing.
"Hah, that's a good one, as if a name can do that!"
>"You...you are the one known as Saitama, aren't you?"
"That's me. Why? Wanna fight?"
>He was quick to wave a hand, dispelling your challenge.
>"Oh no, I am no match. However...the master was curious."
>Only 12 eps tho

>This 'Dark Lord'?
"What did you say his name was? Eli- Elde- Whatever. He's curious about me?"
>Entering the room swiftly, Luna comes in a panic.
>"Sister of mine! We sense a dark presence ris- *gasp*"
>She sees mister messenger and readies into a battle pose.
>"You! We were right! Prepare to-"
>The voice of Celestia, eyeing her solemnly halts her attack, bringing her to a standing position once more.
>Old Spice over here, meanwhile, is hanging onto whatever threatening image he can.
>"Much better. For even if you destroyed me, More would come. They would seek the essence I hold."
"Hey, you."
>He turns, flames flickering in what you can only guess is surprise.
"Tell me where to find this Dark Lord or whatever. I'll meet him personally."
>Though the room is steadily quiet, it soon fills with a rising cacophony of laughter.
>His flames ignite to wild sizes as he does so.
>"To be so foolish! Very well, I will tell you. He lay under the grave of the land, underneath the Cave of the Dead King. Where your kind must tell stories of grim fortunes that befall any who approach. I shall tell you; Those stories are true."
>Both Luna and Celestia gasp in horror, even sadness, upon the mention of this place.
>"But that's...impossible. The cave is supposedly a holy place, where the burial of our forefathers took place!"
>Luna speaks first, portraying her more brash nature.
>The messenger simply points towards her, a ghastly claw of rotting bone.
>"Make no mistake, your ancestors lie there, buried by his hand. And with your precious Tree of Harmony once again sealed, his chains weaken by the hour."
>With one last dramatic turn, this thing 'looks' to you and shouts.
>"If you so dare, Saitama, you will venture to this land and there his greatest demons will challenge you! Only if you can surpass the limits of all history's greatest warriors will you bear witness t-"
>You got what you needed, so you didn't need this.
First season. Second season is pretty likely, don't worry.


>Bone and metal literally ripped through the walls and glass behind the throne, removing his presence from the room.
>At least, almost.
>There was still this time little fire from his remains that seemed to be in agony.
>"Y-you...dare...you will regret this! His forces are already attacking Ponyville as we speak, and his power will be unleashed!"
>Ponyville? But wait...wasn't that where Twilight's friends were?
>And Twilight and Genos were on their way there.
>"You fiend! What do you plan to do with my student and her friends?!"
>Celestia's fury was awakening in the threat of her loved one's life.
>You were curious now too...
>"Hehehehe, *cough*, My flames burn out, but know that there is no hope. With Saitama here, there is no one who can stop us, not even Twilight can. The elements are subdued, hahaha..."
>"We will not wait here and give you victory! The elements will not fight alone!"
>Luna was already rushing for the entrance.
>"Yesss....run now...and leave Canterlot to perish..."
>You turned to look out the window, hearing something faintly.
>What was...
>"Oh no...Luna! Wait!"
>Luna turned in time to see a giant javelin of blackness rain down on Canterlot, to which she and Celestia lunged out of the window.
>Charging their horns they projected a large barricade, challenging the projectile head on.
>It hit, and against their shield there resounding an enormous clang of darkness on light.
>They fought against this weapon until it finally shattered against their magic, but the both of them could scarecely take flight after it's assault.
>Looking on the horizon, they could see other projectiles in air, and they stood at the peak of the mountain.
>Guards poured from the castle after the impact.
>"The end has begun, hehehe...I'll see you...on the other side..."
>His words became a whisper in the wind as they burned away.
"Yeah. It is time to end this."
>Second season is pretty likely
I don't trust those japs.

They always end the good ones early.
Its gonna be amazing seeing the garou fight animated

>Panting and gasping for air on the mountain tops, Celestia and Luna stood with a battallion of mages.
>Unicorns trained heavily in numerous forms of combative magic.
>Some of them were on the ground, unconscious from the barrage they endured.
>Others were pushing through the strain.
>But they had finally warded off the onslaught.
>For a moment, there was finally rest, and Luna nearly collapsed to her stomach.
>"This...this power is unimaginable. What could do such a thing?"
>Celestia slowly trotted to her sister, tenderly nuzzling the side of her head while whispering comfortingly.
>"I am not sure, sister of mine, but we must not surrender. We must believe in Twilight and her friends. And..."
>Turning her head, she and Luna eyed you, who approached with the clack of your signature red boots.
"It's a good thing I had these packed for whenever I need them. You two don't look so hot."
>Celestia appreciated your light heartedness, which she showed with a smile.
>"Well, you look dazzling in that outfit yourself, my friend."
>You returned her smirk with your own, staring off to the horizon where you could see Ponyville, ever so far away.
>"Saitama, they're in danger...I know you just got here to this world. I'm sorry...my sister and I can't leave here, though we can't last forever. We need your help..."
>You could only imagine what was going on back at the little town.
>What kind of terrors were waiting.
>Genos and Twilight would be on their own out there.
"Yeah. I know."
>Genos, Twilight...
>"If they're at the Cave of the Dead King, we'll need to send someone north. We must send a guard to warn the barracks. And we need a force down at Ponyville! We nee- Wait, where are you going?!"
>Luna shouted as she eyed you walking away from the both of them.
>With your cape in the wind, you began your trek.
>"Saitama, that's the wrong way! We need someone to protect Ponyville!"
"Don't worry. I know exactly where I'm going."

>You are Alvior.
>The unmatched terror.
>The right hand man of your liege's armies.
>And you were having quite the fun time here in Ponyville.
>These ponies, they were a rowdy bunch.
>They were fighting you, fighting back with everything they had and you admired that.
>It just wasn't enough.
>You swerved to the side, avoiding a hoof.
>You ducked under a fierce swipe.
>You lept into the air, vaulting over the oncoming lunge and sending them to the ground.
>Landing gracefully, you stood fearlessly.
>Leaning to the side, you avoided the blue one's aerial assault effortlessly.
>As fast as she was.
>You grabbed the orange one's hoof like it were nothing.
>As strong as they were.
>You blocked a fast jump kick from the pink one.
>As skilled as they tried to be.
"And now...counter."
>You recoiled the pink one into the dirt, bouncing her into the air while swinging the orange one overlapping her and sending them both flying with a kick.
>They were just so weak.
>The two of them speared right through a home the was just rebuilt, spreading out along the ground, battered and bruised.
>The yellow and white ones weren't even daring to challenge you.
>They tried to help evacuate the remainder.
>You don't think you'll even humor them.
>But on your approach, the blue one returns after crashing, and blocks off your route.
>She thinks she'll stop you here.
"At least you can die with that joke you call honor."
>You raise your arm towards her, prepared to turn her to mulch.
>It hits you...

>Your advance is brought with immense speeds, taking advantage of this enemy's open spot.
>A heavy bang echoes from the impact as he's sent flying, carrying through buildings and stones like water until finally crashing into the planes out of town.
>The ponies look on in awe and wonder at the gaping hole in half their town which you waste no time leaping through.

>Pinkie just managed to come to, awakening slowly to Rarity and Fluttershy tending to her and Applejack's wounds when she opened her eyes.
>Now she was trying to recuperate from the attack, watching as ponies everywhere are lined up to evacuate.
>When she asked where that meanie had gone, she was pointed to the distance where nothing short of a light show was occuring.
>Now she was doing her best to help pick up the pieces and save those who got caught in the cross fire.
>That is, until she ran into a somewhat familiar looking figure.
>"Ah, it seems I'm not too late. Sorry about this, I came all the way back here to find the one I searched for."
>She didn't manage to say anything to them.
>They just...walked off towards the fight, and she didn't have time to go stop them.
>She just hoped whatever happened, it couldn't get any worse...

>You, the Blond Cyborg, stood before the crumbled mess where your enemy had landed.
>Buried underneath the rubble, you knew the one you struck wasn't gone.
>The laughing confirmed it...
>"My, my, my. This is...interesting."
>Casually, the figure rose from the pile, slowly and sluggishly making his way unscathed back onto solid ground.
>Only his head hanging upside down from his neck, like a rubber cord.
>He lifted his head up, letting it dangle from his fingers, staring at him upside down.
>"I've never seen you before. You're new. And completely out of the equation at that..."
>If that was his way of asking your name, you were happy to let him know who he was dealing with.
"I am Genos. I am among the strongest heroes of my world, Class S. I have no idea who you are, and frankly it doesn't matter right now."
>Bringing your arms in you slowly curl them into fists before taking a stance.
>Spreading your legs and extending your fist out, left arm in.
"You aren't even worth a tombstone to engrave your name on."
>Core: Full Throttle.
>"I see...then forgive me for that courtesy. But without a doubt, you will DIE!"
>But you hadn't seen a single yellow pony this whole time
Dammit, Saitama
>Dawned her hat
>"All aboard"

>No more words were spoken.
>With a click, your jaw felt the brace of your claw-like armor.
>His head snapped back into place.
>You were off.
>Both you and him seemingly vanished as you approached one another, until sparks flew upon impact.
>Time and time again, you both jousted at one another, clashing for the advantage.
>Your speeds were quite equalled, which meant you would have to take a different approach.
>Your feet landed squarely against the ground, and on his next charge you readied your cannons.
>Aiming towards the ground you fired.
"Mountain's Roar!"
>Fire filled the skies upon the eruption of your blast.
>But through the ashes a shadow emerged.
>"Nice try."
>His arm approached, but instead of a fist you caught the vision of a claw rushing towards your face.
>Flipping backwards, you managed to deflect his attack and make distance.
>Only to find the clap become a whip which he sent flying on the backswing.
>You guarded, but the gash against your arms told you that wouldn't work forever.
>He swung once more, attempting to pierce you directly.
>Spinning yourself with a burst of flame, you leapt over impact and grabbed him by the appendage.
"Carelessness will get you caught, filth."
>His eye squinted with a low chuckle, and in an instant it closed, his form seemingly shivering like water.
>You didn't have a chance to realize what happened until it was too late.
>The eye moved through the 'whip' along with most of his body mass, his head distending from the thin line.
>He reared back with a claw once more, only this time he caught your hands in his mass.
>"So will arrogance, cur!"
>In a last ditch effort, threw your head forward, letting the claw draw a gash in your cheek and across the side of your head.
>Grunting, you forced your arms to full force, watching them glow white hot.
>An enormous explosion set the field alight, but it was your only option.
>You came flying out to clumsily land on your feet, scanning every which way for your foe.
oh no please no. just let saitama take the credit for i'm begging you


>The bad news?
>You couldn't find him.
>On the ground at least...
>As the smoke cleared, you saw that this freak was in fact resting in the air.
>Balanced by a tiny thread of that inky blackness, he sat on what looked like a couch of bone and ooze.
>And his form had become more lithe, like that of a skeleton dipped in ink.
>"Not bad. Not bad."
>He gazed down at you, obviously pressured by your insistence, but ultimately unharmed.
>"But not good enough, as it stands. You approach me without even understanding the basics of what I can do, and attack given the chance regardless of my counter-attack options."
>Was he...was he lecturing you?
>"I'll give you a hint because I'm sure you've started figuring it out. I'm not a solid mass. Not on my own, anyways. There's a reason I'm a 'shadow'. This...all of this. This is me."
>The 'couch' shimmered and shook, as more of those grotesque eyes sprouted across it.
>"And as such, attacking me is pretty useless. Even your fires cannot reach me when I can move like air. And yet you fight, regardless. I can slip through your attacks, match your speed, and swinging at me is pointless. Makes you want to give up now, doesn't it?"
>While speaking, he sat up, and his feet were met by a platform forming from his 'mass'.
>Step by step, he lowered himself like an invisible staircase, the spire shrinking as it stretched further and further.
>As he did so, his form filled out, until it was as before.
>"In a way, it's like weaponized anorexia, where I continuously empty my body to become slimmer and faster, and harder to hit."
"So in other words, you're saying you're invincible."
>Even without a mouth, you could tell he would be grinning.
>As ominous as it sounded, and as powerful as he seemed...
>You knew there was no such thing.
>But...that told you a lot...
"How sad."
>"What did you say?"
"How lowly, sad. Miserable, even."

>The rumbling groan that emanated from this monster was more curious than anything.
>"And what makes you think that I, the shadow of my liege, were miserable?"
>Standing upright, you looked him dead on, and spoke.
"Because all you are is a shadow. Just a casting of something greater. Even your body can't lie, it's meaningless and only meant to hide away."
>You could see the shrinking of his pupil, and the tension of his body rising.
"If I'm swinging at a shadow, I might as well just ignore you. Even if you won, it's not even your victory, is it? It's good that I ignored something as pointless as your name."
>Just a bit more.
>"Hmmm! What did you say?! I am my lord's second in command! My power is beyond any other in his armies, second only to him!"
>"And y'all are still an eye-sore, ya know that?"
>A surprise to both of you, that orange one had trekked up here.
>And gave you the perfect opportunity.
>"You...I'll silence you-"
"Wrong way."
>The moment he turned to swing at that pony, you were right behind him, with a heavy right incoming.
>Direct hit.
>One could almost feel the impact from looking at it.
>It was enough to send the poor bastard straight through a hill.
>Steam rose off of your arm as you glanced over towards the mare, but she quickly eased your worries.
>"Ahm not here ta fight, ah just had ta give him a piece of mah mind. Go get'em, slugger. Sock 'em one for me."
>A smirk met your lips as you dashed off.
>Thanks to her, and your opponent's arrogance, you think you knew what you had to do.
>Shortly after, the shadows returned.
>Bursting from the ground, his casual walk brought him face to face with you.
>And you stopped inches from him, kicking dust into the air.
>When it cleared, you and him were neck and neck.
>"You think you've already won, don't you?"
>You don't give him the grace of a response.
>All you did was stare.
>"I'll end your miserable existence."

"So this is the Cave of 'Dead Kings', huh?"

>Standing before the arc of the cave's entrance, you can only assume this is the place.
>It was gigantic, spooky, and there was darkness literally seeping out of it.
"Let's get this over with, I suppose."
>Stepping into the shadows, you descend the cave bit by bit, able to see things far more accurately than any normal person.
>Gaming with King did that to you.
>Not even 10 minutes into this place, you're jumped.
>Bursting from the ground, a giant half-skeletal monster that had the legs of a cow, as well as the skull of something bovine, and a humanoid ribcage blocked your path.
>It was also like 10 feet tall.
>"BEHOLD! Fearless traveler, you have wandered into the cave of Dead Kings, the origin of darkness! I am Abagnai, undead Minotaur champion! And if you wish to travel further, you must taste my A-aaaaaAGHGHHH!"
>Aaaand punched.
>Welp, that wasn't gonna be fun for whoever had to clean this up.
>Onto the next level.

>Jumping out of the way of a way of thorns rising from the ground, you landed against the stone wall of a cliff, thrusting yourself off and towards the source of the attacks.
>One vicious eye stare back at you with every movement, as you prepped your first for a swing.
>You pulled, instead, flying right through him and turning, carefully watching his body for movements.
>Once you spotted a particular growth you spun, propelling yourself into a kick which narrowly missed it's target, but sent him reeling.
>You weren't giving him space.
>Another lunge was met with his chest erupting in thorns, attempting to impale you.
>This was getting easier as you went.
>He couldn't even keep track of you as you flew into the air at immense speeds.
>Spinning, you began to spiral and twist, using your arms to form a dive kick, twisting like a drill.
"Spear of Zeus!"
>The ground ruptured in a massive radius, your foe barely having enough time to evade, sustaining a scuff along his 'core'.
>The secret of his power was that which empowered him.

>He wasn't this big, powerful mass.
>He was a little coward hiding in the shadows.
>And you were a relentless machine.
>There was only so much to go around for him, so each movement that he misdirected made him slower and slower.
>You'd already tossed him around a good bit as it was.
>Before the dust had even cleared from your attack, you had a lock on him.
>He was predictable.
>Keeping low to the ground, you sped like a bullet towards his unstable form.
>And nailed him square in his sweet spot.
>Every movement of his held lag in it's attacks.
>Foresight was everything to him.
>Careening into the wall of a cliff, you had him cornered.
>Everything that was in your vision was engulfed as fire filled the world.
>Melting through stone, digging into the cliff.
>Nothing could've survived a direct impact like that.
>But you still knew he wasn't done.
>"*pant*...Cross-hatch Cage."
>The air began to settle.
>Sitting against the corroded earth was your target.
>In front of him, he had formed a shifting barricade that wove in between itself continuously disrupting the force of your attack.
>But you could make out his real form somewhere behind that mess.
>The form which you could punch.
>It was more like a brain, or rather a nucleus.
>Small, barely surrounded by his shadow.
>But it soon reformed to his natural state.
>"You said your name was Genos..."
>He slowly rose to his 'feet', changing up his look a little bit.
>"I'm not taking any more chances. You only seem to get faster as I go."
>He looked down, eyeing his own hand solemnly.
>"No, it's that I'm getting slower. With each strike that I miss my mass stretches farther. I'm not succeeding by trying to engulf you."
>His body seemed to tighten further as he clenched every muscle of his form, and closed his eye.
>"Then I'll fight you, at my fastest!"
>This could mean trouble...
>The energy he was releasing now put cracks in the wall around him.

>His face seemed to glow with a brighter red as instead of one eye, 3 split open along his features.
>His skin seemed to solidify, becoming thinner.
>"By condensing my form completely, my body will become both the strongest and the fastest! All of my power, all of my mass, given solid form and destructive ability!"
>Each of his arms were thin as bone, but with spiked knuckles and clawed fingers, and his 'hair' now spiked directly back like blades.
>"I'll show you why I am second in command!"
>And so, the battle commensed.
"This time...I'll crack that skull wide open."

"Let's see, that was...floor 20? 21? I lost count..."
>Somewhere after the 'Griffon' monster, you stopped caring, really.
>Mutants, undead.
>The usual themed stuff.
>But you think you finally found it.
>This 'door' thing.
>Behind this there was the big bad, right?
>You hoped so, you were about ready to just punch the ground.
"Here goes nothing."
>Winding up, you brought your trusty fist forward.

>*Generic clashing noise*
>The battle between you and this monster had not ceased yet.
>You were both traveling at your absolute top speeds, nothing was getting in your way.
>Now your opponent wasn't hiding from you.
>But he still wasn't showing himself, he couldn't.
>What a truly pained existence.
>You would have no problems ending it swiftly.
>Narrowly dodging a swipe from his claws, you land with a skid.
>At the incoming straight, you deflect with your fore-arm, and turn to counter his kick with your own.
>Now it was a close fight.
>But you knew his mindset well at this point.
>Igniting your arms, you launch into an elbow jab to his back and knock him into a flight, which you're quick to intercept.
>He can barely block it, and is nearly thrown into the lake.
>Let's help him with that.
>With a tackle, you carry him all the way across the body of water and straight into a drove of trees.
>It didn't matter how fast or strong he got.
>You were still one step ahead of him.
Is that a bad thing? I've got an arc to finish.
>Is that a bad thing?

>You only had to-
>An enormous projectile came careening down towards you, missing you by a hair but throwing you back across the lake from the shockwave.
>And followed by your assailant.
>Whatever it was, it wasn't as fast as you.
>But it's attacks were beyond powerful.
>It nearly took out the cliff with it's last strike.
>Alvior leapt from his landing zone towards the battle, but he didn't seem intent on continuing it yet.
>"Why...would they send you? I had everything under control."
>On cue, the ground trembled as it was powderized, revealing a massive form.
>It spoke with a loud, gruff, boisterous voice.
>From the dust and pebbles raining from the air, you could finally make out what you saw.
>It was almost like a giant, metal turtle.
>It's arms and legs were enormous, like tree trunks and it's shell, or body, shined with thick plating.
>No wonder it wasn't as fast, but by no means was it slow either.
>It's head could be recognized by the glow of it's eyes through the visor of it's helment.
>"No, not too long. Just not long enough. I had everything under control. You. Can. Leave."
>By the looks of things, they didn't exactly get along.
>The newcomer stomped his foot angrily, smashing a crater into the ground.
>The 'master'?
>That must be the origin of all of this.
>One was fine, but...
>"Then I will take this one ALONE!"
>Or that.
"Hey. If you'd rather I deal with you both, you could at least tell me who, or what, you are."
>You draw it's attention hoping to gather any information you can on him.
>If you were lucky, their squabble would lighten the load.

>Two of the 'Dark lord's strongest fighters here before you.
>You were so close, too.
>Were you...too slow?
>"I would tell you otherwise, because you're too much of an oaf to keep your mouth shut, Kaibara."
>Lowering himself into a crouch, Kaibara threw his fist into the ground, staring Alvior face to face.
>Despite the two of them looking ready to go to blows, you couldn't help but feel that time was running out.
>"Then let's make this quick. If I have to suffer the shame of actually needing to be associated with you, all the more reason to end this."
>Kaibara rose to his feet and took a step forward, eyes locked onto you now.
>"Sorry, Genos. I was prepared to wipe you out myself, but plans change. Don't take this too personally."
"Yeah...I won't."
>The dust was kicked up, you had determination in you, but you had no intention of challenging them both head on.
>You'd have to defend until...a miracle happened.

>10 tons of stone and metal, enchanted with sacred rituals, was just punched into pieces.
>Toppling over into the room, which was as typical as any other dark lord that you had face before, you made his slow entrance in.
>Runes covered the ground before you.
>There was a black pillar in the center of the room, too.
>But you didn't see any dark lo-
>This was...rain...slime...?
"Hmmm? Oh..."
>There he was. This enormous black mass in the center was his torso.
>That made much more sense.
>"It is you...Saitamaaaaa..."
>Darknened black fur covered his mid-waist, climbing up to his shoulders which had sharpened bone pauldrons chained to them.
>His arms were restrained by chains as well, though they were covered in paper charms.
>And his face was covered by a large metal mask front and back.
>It's front was like that of a demon gazing down at him, drooling...something from behind.
>Now this was a big one.
im almost getting a dark souls vibe here

"You must be...what was it? El-..."
>A deep resonation that sounded akin to a chuckle echoed outwards.
>A quaking rushed through the earth around you both, though you didn't really feel a thing.
"I'm just gonna call you Elly. That's too much to remember....Huh?"
>The ooze that had dripped down earlier rose up slowly as you said that, forming into vaguely humanoid slime, no legs but a torso with arms.
>"The gatekeeper, Ramiul, will test your true powers..."
>I'm sorry what? You missed it over the sound of splattering.
>"Haha....Hahaha! HAHAHAHAHA!"
>Tremors erupted from the wake of his vicious laughter, the remains of his 'gatekeeper' sizzling away.
>There goes another concept art.
>"So even my keeper fell before you without a struggle? Marvelous. Simply magnificent, Saitama..."
>You could tell the change in his body language, whatever little there was.
>He was getting excited.
"Ah, yeah. You look pretty tough, huh?"
>There was seemingly no end to the level of amusement you brought him.
>He lunged forward, tugging on the chains that bound him and reaching his enormous head closer to you, just a few feet away.
>The remains of the door were thrown completely out of the room as demonic glowing eyes stared you down.
>You just sort of stood there, then jokingly pulled back and stuck your arm out without really punching.
"Baaang! Gotcha."
>He slowly pulled himself back.
>"I can tell there is no more I can do to assure myself that you are the one. My eyes have seen all the proof in the world."
>Hmm, come to think of it, how was he gonna fight you?
"With all those restraints, it'd be kinda hard to attack, wouldn't it?"
>Well, you thought, but then the entrance was sealed by the stone below it closing like a gate.
>"Believe me. This will be an excellent warm up. I will do everything I can to unleash my full power against you, Saitamaaa...."
>Is that so...?
>You stuck your fist out in a beckoning fashion.
"Bring it."
poor guy's gonna be massively disappointed, isn't he?

>The ground lit up greatly as the runes around him shined.
>You could feel a pressure emanating from them, like arms pulling at you.
>Shouldn't be too much trouble.
>You notice that his body is also being restrained around back by large...what look to be weapons.
>Impaling him, nailing him into the ground.
>"Taste the wrath of the ancients!"
>His claws flashed with burning power, and like that, the room was engulfed in flames.

>Your screams of pain echoed out as another swing made it through your defense, sending you trailing through the ground.
>Since this fight began, you were fiercely on the defensive.
>With Alvior's speed and power, you were already given a priority, but Kaibara's attacks were a must dodge.
>Even if you avoided his huge attacks, Alvior would slip by and give you a hard time.
>Plus even your strongest attacks only somewhat phased Kaibara directly.
>Rising from the ground slowly, you tried to throw your arm out for a blast.
>But it was no longer there.
>"Looking for something?"
>With a clank, it hit the ground uselessly.
>"All that technology and it doesn't even make a difference now. I feel truly bad for you."
>"I know. Kaibara ruins everything, doesn't he?"
>Said monster landed before the both of you, obviously impatient with your shenanigens.
>Another sigh from your half-friend thing and you knew things were about to end for you...
>"I got it. I got it. You were entertaining while it lasted but...all good things come to an end."
>Reeling back his arm, you had the self-destruct on stand-by for that moment...
>"Ahhh, not so fast!"
>Atop the cliff...
>There was someone there.
>"I've found you! And just in time, too."
>That voice...
>The figure lunged off the cliff, showing impressive grace.
>They removed their cloak...
>Oh no...
>It was...
> Dark Angel...
Aaaand gotta go take care of something. Be back in like 30 minutes to an hour.
I rather hope so.

I hesitate to even say this, since Temporal writefag has demonstrated that he's more than a halfway decent storyteller and that he understands OPM as a series, but if saitama actually experienced his first "serious" challenge in this silly MLP fanfic it would be the definition of missing the point

I mean (spoiler for those who haven't read the original OPM manga) even fucking garou, the god-level-threat of a villain that spent the better part of the manga being set up as saitama's dark mirror, ended up getting completely leveled without even fazing saitama.

incidentally, who else thought the dark figure in this story was garou? especially when alvior was first being described, I totally thought it was him.
Look up the webcomic, shit gets real good. Especially Tatsumaki vs Saitama fight.
Technically Saitama's first real challenge was our dear friend Crablante, so I can't go there.

>The form of a titanic man surrounded by feathers of blackness came raining down on your armor-clad assailant, Kaibara.
>In his birthday suit.
>A flurry of devestating blows submerged his form in havoc with blinding speeds.
>The surprise which pulled Alvior's gaze towards this new threat was all you needed to level the playing field.
>Time to follow an example.
>You threw a vicious uppercut into alvior's chin, rattling his body.
>After tenderizing Kaibara in earth shattering blows, your new ally sent him flying with a dainty looking kick.
"Puri Puri!"
>You shouted, rearing back to throw another jab at Alvior, who managed to guard but was thrown right into range of an enormous fist.
>Like a ball being tossed back and forth, Alvior was relentlessly shot back towards you.
>Ascending into the air, you poised yourself for one of your signature moves.
>His eyes watched helplessly as he was too damaged to control his shell of a form.
>Even one armed, the torrent of attacks you unleashed was sure to bury him.
>Piston attacks cracked his bodily shielding with unrelenting fury before you let gravity take hold and bring you down with one last heavy attack.
>Almost in slow motion, you could see the shock, the pain, the fear in his eyes upon leaping from his form.
>Behind you, the musclehead of muscleheads posed his 'glorious' pose as he called it.
"I'd ask what you're doing here but now is most certainly not the appropriate time. Thanks for the save."
>As you feared, he turned to you with those 'beady eyes' of his and winked.
>"Ahhhn, but of course, Genos-baby~ There's no leaving behind a piece of work like you, now is there~?"
>You felt unclean...
>But the fight must go on.
>Neither of your opponents was out for the count.
>But things were a lot more level.
I've been reading ONE almost since it came out.


>And there was Kaibara again.
>Barrelling towards the two of you like a cannonball.
"Puri Puri. Can you-"
>"Say no more, Genos-darling. This one's mine."
>Which left you with your old 'friend'.
>You didn't even have to look to the dust cloud that formed upon Kaibara's impact.
>You already know he missed.
>"Tut Tut. Now that's no way to approach an opponent."
>The titanic tortoise reared for another attack, but even at his speeds, he was outmatched by by a cross-counter from Prisoner.
>"With all that armor, someone is COM-PENT-SA-TING~ I've got nothing, and I'm faster 'and' stronger than you are, it seems."
>Tank vs Tank, and the metal one was losing.
>You couldn't help but smirk as you turned your attention back to the now tipsy Alvior.
"I might be missing an arm, but I've got backup now, and you're running out of steam."
>You wouldn't have been more surprised by anything...
>Except laughing.
>"You're a lucky son of a bitch, you know that?"
>Oh yeah, you knew.
"Let's go!"
>Final round.

"Hup...hyup. Woah there!"
>Right now you felt something akin to those old DDR machines they had in arcades when you were young.
>You also remember you sucked at them but they were pretty fun.
>But right now you weren't in no DDR machine.
>You were dodging just about every projectile that came your way.
>Mostly to humor the guy.
>I mean he was down here for how long?
>A guy has gotta get bored eventually.
>But you admit there was something strange about this room.
>Whenever you put in the effort to dodge something, it always felt like you were getting less than you put out.
>Like every move was cut in half or something.
>You got hit a couple times near the beginning when this force started acting on you, but you began to compensate for it.
>"Now, Saitama. Are you prepared for the grand finale?!"

"Ah, hold up."
>You put your hand out to tell him to pause before he did...whatever he was about to do.
"Can you tell me what's up with this weird feeling? It's not painful or anything, but everytime I try to do something, it just doesn't come out right. What's that about?"
>Once again, he yanked on the chains around his arms and the ground glowed brighter still.
>"This is my prison, I was put here thousands, tens of thousands of years ago by the forefathers of pony kind! They sealed me with a spell which would imprison me here, and weaken my every move."
>Oh good lord here we go agai-
>"BUT! Before they sealed the chamber doors for good, I gathered every bit of power I had to curse this chamber, and transform it into a ritual cell! Everything which walks on the runes of my prison will have it's power sapped away! Every second you stand in here, your energy will deplete! Victory is imminent, for I will not fall, and you w-"
"So what happens if I break it?"
>"Break my prison? Hahaha, HAHAHAHA! How FOOLISH you would be! For releasing me in all my might, where all my power would be restored! I would rise again, and this world will know true darkness!"
>Ahh, this spiel.
"Alright then. I'll crack it open. This is getting a little annoying."
>Your words only seemed to humor this monster further.
>"To what end must I go to end your jokes? I have waited millenia, confined here. What makes you think you ca-"
"Serious series:"
>You raised your leg high into the air, eyes cast down and blackened by the shadows.
"Serious Stomp."
>With a heavy boom, you split the ground in two, then shattering it into little pieces.
>Runes flew across the room and the cavern began to crumble around you.
>Light began to shine down from above as the ceiling started collapsing, and the chains around Elly's arms shuddered.
>And then finally broke.
>His helmet began to glow with heat until it burst.

>Was a more unique laugh out of the budget or something?
>Beneath his helmet, the image was nothing too original.
>Glowing red eyes behind an almost boar-like face, with heavy tusks jutting out.
>Half his face was bone, signifying that he was, perhaps, not fully regenerated.
>That was the usual excuse.
>"NEVER in my life of endless time would I have seen someone so meagerly foolish!"
"So we can fight now, right?"
>As though completely caught off guard, the roaring beast went almost completely quiet.
>"AS IF!"
>Everything turned to dust as Elly lunged out of his hole and rammed right through the several layers of earth above him, casting a true shadow over the land once he reached the surface.
>"Now that I'm free, what good is wasting time with small fry like you! I commend you for breaking my seal, but I've got bigger fish to fry!"
>Not cool dude.
>You were a little buried, but it wasn't hard to pull yourself out.
>"Sayonara, idiot!"
>With unbelieveable great speeds, Elly here practically vanished, bursting off towards the nearest signal of his warriors.
>Well, shit.
>You guess you gotta go chase him down.
>You hate when this happens.

>You two were kicking ass over here.
>You were still faster than Alvior, and Prisoner was still stronger than Kaibara.
>The situation seemed completely assured.
>You had Alvior on his knees, too shaken up to move.
"All this title and it amounts to so little. But it looks like this is checkmate."
>"Ahhh, so cool, Genos-Baby~"
>Despite the call from behind, you're personally proud of yourself.
>This was a victory for you heroes.
>That is until...
>"Outta my way!"
>Whatever just passed you...
>Took your other arm with it.
>"Genos?! Are you alright?"
>"IT'S HIM!!"
>"Master Elethadus...I don't believe it."
>This THING was the Dark Lord?
>"Oh my...I know Big and Black and that is it right there..."
>Oh GOD!
>>"Oh my...I know Big and Black and that is it right there..."
You are doing God's work my friend

>Were you going to die with two terrifying images?
"Where is Saitama Sensei...?"
>Moving it's gaze slowly back down to you, the beast just laughed.
>"Him?...I left him 50 feet under, that's where! HAHAHA!"
>Hold on.
"You mean....you don't-"
>"The idiot was dumb enough to set me free! As if he could stop me..."
>Oh my god.
>No, that's a lie.
"You're lying."
>It took another step forward, sending the water from the lake spilling.
>"Hmm? You think so?"
>That's impossible.
"How? He is...he's the strongest man."
>Apparently you just told the funniest joke.
>"HAAAAAAHAHAHA! HIM?! The strongest man?! He couldn't even get in my way!"
>"Genos-baby, what's the matter?! Please, get up!"
>You barely noticed when the strength in your legs gave out.
>But that's impossible, right?
>And if this guy could...
>Then fighting him is...
>Let alone like this.
>Kaibara escaped from Prisoner's range and moved to this abomination's said.
>And Alvior, however sluggishly, made his way over as well.
>It was almost disrespectful how little attention he paid to you.
>"Master...my liege. We have nearly obtained victory, with you here it is assured!"
>He held his arms out, legs quivering from weakness as he sought refuge.
>With such exhaustion in his voice.
>"I await your orders, sire!"
>What was he...?
>He slowly lifted his immense fist from the splatter stain that used to be Alvior.
>"I have no need for one who cannot even destroy this filth."
>He turned his eyes towards his 'subordinate' as well.
>"If I must rule by myself, so be it."
>You could barely hold empathy for the betrayal before you.
>Even in spite of his attempts to escape, the sounds of metal bursting underneath ungodly pressure filled the air.
>This was...that power.
>That killed...?
>"You two are next. And then, the world."
Side not Said

>A fist would've impacted your immobile body if the form of another massive man wasn't there to deflect it.
>And even then, only barely.
>"Agh! Genos! Get up, we have to go!"
>But...you didn't feel any power left.
>Your body might as well have been a corpse sitting there, waiting to be buried.
>His only option was to grab you and jump, trying to escape combat range.
>But even that was fruitless.
>You knew that much already.
>You two were easily cornered, and beaten to the ground.
>"Genos...I'm sorry, I can't fight this thing off myself."
"No one can."
>He looked to you with a shocked expression.
>You just lay there, on the ground.
>Your bangs lay lazily, half covering your eyes.
"Don't feel bad...it's just...impossible."
>All your readings, all your statistics.
>They points towards 0 even if the entirety of the S-class were here.
>How could they not?
>It was all...fucking useless.
"How can we hope to beat the unstoppable?"
>Prisoner could only look on, truly hurt by your crushed form.
>Probably not because you were so depressed.
>But likely because you were just so...pathetic looking.
>Here it comes...
>Your final moments.
>Would it be worth it to self destruct?
>There probably wasn't even enough time.
>The beast stood over the both of you now.
>"Say hello to the bald one for me!"
>But then.

>This was your last shot.
>It was everypony's last shot! You flew on high, looking down at that blemish on the face of the earth.
>Faster and faster you began to dive, aiming straight towards it's ugly head.
>The wind began to tear before you and magic roared through your body.
>From your mane to your tail, you sparked with that special charm of yours.
>And then it finally happened.
"Sonic Rainboom!"
>The sky lit into the brightest colors imaginable.
>And with the speed of sound behind you, you delivered a kick dead on to your target.
>Who didn't budge an inch.