▶Informed Consent Providers: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/932389/Trans/Stepping%20Forward%20-%20Informed%20Consent%20Clinics.pdf
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▶Transition timelines: http://imgur.com/a/qWpxv
▶Voice Training: http://pastebin.com/dgipdsge
▶HRT info: https://web.archive.rg/web/0000000000000 http://taimapedia.org/index.php?title=Hormones
▶Voice Help: http://webjedi.net/projects/lgbtq/speech-therapy/
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This is what nightmares are made of
the poutine was pretty good but they made the fries crispy which isnt how poutine is supposed to be
other than that it was really good, for some reason i dont have a very big appetite today though
im so tired desu
Are you girls going?
no remember he's a tomgirl
speaking of nightmares, i find it strange that two nights ago, i had an erotic dream involving my best friend, and last night i had an erotic dream involving my best friend being genderswapped
random erotic dreams aren't unexpected, but two in a row about the same real person is unheard of
All I want is to be able to pass well enough that I can dress like a boy and have short hair and still have people consider me a girl in public.
and you're a lot of fun to tie up~
>that shirt pull down at "sexcy tiem"
What did he mean by that?
I try to eat more because I wanna get fat but its like impossible.
Having a dream about some one you know being genderswapped is really wierd, I had dreams of being genderswapped since I was a little kid but never about anyone else being genderswapped.
You can't deny the existence of Chris-Chan, can you? It's clear he's a real person. Definitely not any sort of trans though.
yeah id fucking ravage you
whats your issue? come to portland if u want a good dicking
right that's why i think it's weird
the good news is that i've at least stopped having dreams of myself being male
i choose to believe it's staged, for my own mental health
I was around there but im up to like 125 now. Wanna get fatter. Want bigger butt.
T-there is no such thing as AGP
I think I had a dream of myself being male a month or two ago and that was the only one in recent memory. Even when I was presenting male Id dream of myself as female, when I was a teenager it was really weird and I didn't get it. Id tell my friends and we'd all laugh about it. It started with one where I dreamed I was my grandma.
If Chris Chan is a girl I give up my true-trans status and go back to being just a trap.
Please tell me this isn't true, please tell me you're saying this just to scare me.
well you are cute
my dreaming is very strange and vivid
the "me" in dreams is usually reflective of insecurities so no matter the setting or events, if i focus on my body it's typically my own as it is in life
recently, it's been decidedly female, though still not cis, but i suspect this is just following the pattern that draws me so deeply into my dreams that i could be fully aware and not recognize the illusion
>tfw too heavy and large for guys to pick you up easily
>tfw never going to pass
but how tall are you?
i'm 5'8 and like 165
Is there different levels of dysphoria? I've strongly felt for 10 years now that I am meant to be a woman, but I don't hate my body my penis or anything. Living as a man is uncomfortable for me, but it doesn't feel impossible. When I do things I always get this feeling in the back of my mind that, "I should be doing this as a girl." Not just sex related but sometimes I want to sit down and read a book, and I just think, "It would be better if I was reading this book as a girl." And then I lose interest in reading for now. I don't like buying clothes because I mostly just fine female attire appealing. Everything I do reminds me that I would be better off doing it as a woman.
But I feel like I don't have the same hatred for my body and myself that transexual people have. I like my body, my face. It's fine, it's just not mine. Hell, I want to keep my penis at all costs. No doubt in my mind.
Do you think I really do have gender dysphoria, or is this just me being fucked in the head and having some sort of AGP.
>tfw hang around strong guys who could carry two of me despite my weight
i eat a lot of fiber, I need to do squats desu, looking at underwear reminded me i have no butt
You don't HAVE to hate yourself, you just need to want to be a girl and feel like you can't live as a man I guess. This will probably change once you start hormones anyway. Especially about your penis. I thought I was gonna keep mine and now I'm really not sure anymore! Sometimes I just want it gone!
I mean, I had some amount of success fitting in too, it's just more that I tended to just sort of emulate what they were doing because I otherwise had no idea. Horseplay confused the fuck out of me. ;~;
I'm not fat though, I'm like 5'10" and an average weight. ;~;
How tall are you?
>yume trying to get in bed with the entire U.S. population of trips
>cucked gem with mado
>took away adri's purity
>turned edie into a transbian
>trying to lure beepbeep, raifu, and now amyvictoria
>it's a fad to join their clubhouse
What happened to this board?
Im currently corsetting and doing stomach intensive workouts so that I get a flat tummy and big butt. If it works Ill let you know sometime down the road.
How horrifying. Chris Chan made me sick before he started pretending to be trans. Him coming out as trans is a stain on us all.
Huh, that is kinda weird. I normally dream of myself as being cis. Most of my dreams I don't address my genitals so I guess I could be trans in some and not know it. I had a sex dream that I was eaten out once, I wasn't openly trans yet either, even to myself, so that one was well remembered.
Just date stronger guys, worst that can happen is they're hotter.
Squats also helped me a ton with the weight loss/giving me the legs and ass I needed as pre fucking everything. Everyone apparently notices it too.
Start out with around 25-50 daily and increase them per your repertoire if you feel as if you need to.
Hrm, mile run + crunches/situps every other day, squats on days I'm not doing those. It might help. I don't have much discipline nor control over my food intake, but burning some of the calories could help I guess. I just want my body to have enough energy left to like, give me tits and stuff.
The old redneck dudes on Duck Dynasty are more feminine than Chris Chan is.
An active duty deployed marine is more feminine than Chris Chan is.
A statue of a phallus is more feminine than Chris Chan is.
That's precisely what I started out with and have continued doing now; makes crossdressing so much easier now too. Only reason I'm still 150 however is because I plateau'd back in October after getting sick from a concert and then school started catching up on me. Should be able to go down in no time though, meaning unless something is wrong with your metabolism, you'll be able to do it too just fine!
>no bf or gf that wants to fuck a 6'1" tomboy with a penis
Okedoke, that sounds pretty good. I'm just not sure what to do about calorie intake and stuff. I don't want to start burning more calories, thus getting hungrier, and then eat everything I just lost back.
Hence why I said eat tons of fiber earlier; it fills you up more than average food does and burns the fat inside as well. Don't be afraid to add white meat into the mix either to build up the right amount of protein while doing said exercises as well. It'll also shape the muscles in the desired areas as well.
Putting aside any kind of diagnosis, it sounds like you definitely feel like you are less happy because you are living as a man and that you would be more happy living as a woman. If you were able to change how you think of yourself or express yourself in order to feel better about yourself, putting aside what others might think, what would you change?
Being asleep is sort of the best thing ever, my bf was talking to me about the healthier he gets the less he sleeps, my response was that I want to get as unhealthy as possible to sleep most of the day.
You're post-op though, it should be easy to find guys to date. Guys will fuck anything with a vagina.
There is nothing less feminine than Chris-Chan.
The average tomboy transbian is a hundred times more of a woman and more feminine than Chris-Chan. An eighty year old black hon is more of a woman than Chris-Chan. Literally anything is more feminine than Chris-Chan.
>If you were able to change how you think of yourself or express yourself in order to feel better about yourself, putting aside what others might think, what would you change?
I'm struggling to come up with an answer that isn't "my gender", but I can't. It's really the one thing.
>Literally anything is more feminine than Chris-Chan.
Literally anything is more feminine than Chris-Chan, and yet literally anything is more masculine than Chris-Chan.
He's an enigma of failure.
I mean, I'm not recommending actually doing anything with no concern for how others will think, this is just a thought experiment to try to help them figure out what they mean when they say they want to be a woman.
You need to be a woman to be a lesbian. Chris Chan is a bad crossdresser living in a delusional world he constructed in the bedroom his mom lets him live in.
We should start referring to chris chan as it, grouping it with men could be construed as misandry.
So if I have a vibrating dildo where should I be putting it for max effect? It's nothing amazing just a 20 dollar 5 incher from Spencers.
I get mixed reviews too much. Some people say in butt but that doesn't feel amazing. Some people saying on top of my gt but that doesn't feel amazing either.
Is there some magical method I can apply with this thing to cum like a girl? I've been on hormones long enough now I think to get the effect. Fapping barely feels nice at all now and is more like a chore and male orgasm sucks anyways...
or do I need something like a hitachi to get any external effects?
I mean, where does it feel good when you're just rubbing with your fingers? That might be a good place to start. Then again, I don't really have any experience with vibrating things except for the Nintendo 64 controllers back when I was a kid so I can't really give very useful advice...
>got a throwaway email?
Why'd you need that?
Physical. I like who I am now mentally, I just don't look the way I want to. Socially I'm pretty okay, I mean I don't have a lot of friends or anything but I'm kind of introverted. I feel like I'd be a lot more socially outgoing if I looked like a girl.
I love myself. I love myself a lot. I'm not really self conscious about how I look right now, I take care of myself and I'm pretty confident I'm at least averagely good looking. But I hate taking pictures of myself or putting myself into situations where I need to act like I'm attractive.
If you were to remove all social stigma and everything from my mind, and tell me to act sexy for a camera I wouldn't put a hand around my big guy like I'm CIA and try to act tough or manly. Or lift me shirt up and put on a stern face. I'd sooner bite my lip and grab my chest or bend over with my butt up.
I don't know. I'm rambling. Basically, I like being me. I'm happy with who I am mentally, but my body just doesn't line up with that.
Kayla leaves his room and experiences the real world at work we can assume. Kayla is not a complete failure. Kayla can also shave his shadow unlike Chris-Chan.
I can kinda empathize, Ive only been able to handle small doses of lucy/shrooms for a while now.
Do you think that I think I am a whore?
I acknowledge that I could be wrong and in the small chance that I am I don't want to group them with, *it*.
:(, so coming up on a year now. I was alone for almost three years before I met my current bf, give it time.
I thought he said he did, I guess all he has on Chris Chan is being able to shave his stubble after all. Not as fat or autistic either.
>tfw she drank and then napped but then couldnt sleep and now she just has a headache
Oh wait thats me.
>implying she was interested at all
this was never said by either me or plant, nor did either of us call it a date.
plant is that you?
this is new information to me
>tfw no protecting loving gf that doesn't care if I'm clingy because she knows that I'm just scared she'll leave me like all the others.
>tfw ruin things before they even happen because mentally unstable.
Happier that's for sure. I don't know if this counts as wanting to identify as one, but if I was a boy that looked like a girl I'd definitely spend 24x7 dressed as one, acting like one, and living as one. I'd want people to see me as one and I wouldn't ever correct them. I'd post pictures of myself online and I'd pick the female option on every profile (I basically already do that).
Actually now that I think about it the first thing I'd do if I was a boy that looked like a girl would be bless genetics and start HRT. Since I'd have no hesitation about being unable to pass.
it's cute, gets better, also the first time around it was fun to make guesses about what was going on and foreshadowing and stuff like cookiecat
>tfw no protecting loving gf that doesn't care if I'm clingy because she knows that I'm just scared she'll leave me like all the others.
I'm pretty clingy and protective, maybe overly so on the last part. As long as you stay clung to me we could be good.
Qt should take an aspirin and go to bed again. Leave the booze to bad bitches like me.
>all these people wanting a clingy partner
No, you don't
t. clingy partner
Yeah, I'm trying to be patient, it's hard though. I'm honestly really lonely.
For perspective, before my ex I was alone for 20 years so I'm used to waiting, but I mean when guys aren't even approaching me or talking to me it's hard to have a lot of hope.
>this is new information to me
There was a drama that ElfGinger broke up with her girlfriend and was dating Plant for a month before we found out. It isn't sure if they broke up before or after Plant but it was near the same time you met up. They live three thousand miles apart on he opposite sides of the country so it isn't anything to be jealous about. It's the usual fucked up tranny drama.
>tfw no protecting loving gf that doesn't care if I'm clingy because she knows that I'm just scared she'll leave me like all the others
i know this feel exactly ;_;
So your main concern seems really to be that you're worried you won't be able to pass as a girl (whether or not you call yourself one or continue to call yourself a boy), and that you do feel like you want to start HRT but are afraid that it might be a mistake if you aren't able to eventually pass as female. Is that right?
>tfw want a gf to protect but also want someone to protect me
I don't know what to do, I like taking care of people but I need the exact same from my partner
>tfw your partner was worried that youd find them too clingy
>say no its okay Im clingy too
>tfw Im the clingier one
at least she finds it cute otherwise she probably would've broken my heart by now
im sorry kuppy but its probably going to get worse when you start to transition
the more I pass the more it hurts to get clocked
Wait people actually want someone clingy? In my experience that doesnt seem to be the case. This place is always filling my head with lies!
Teach me how to bad bitch pls. ;~;
>Teach me how to bad bitch pls. ;~;
I don't think that's something to be taught or a desirable trait but I guess you could start by bullying one of the numerous tripfags or worse becoming one.
you need to transition of course
if you do who knows how happy you will end up being, but if you dont then youll probably end up killing yourself
its the better of the two evils at the very least
also youll be a cute
dont deprive the world of 2017 (or late 2016) cute girl kuppy
Coming up on 6 this summer, this is what I look like, please forgive the over plucked brows and crappy selfying.
Idk, being post op I guess will help with the part when it comes to saying "BTW I'm trans", but it doesn't help a lot with meeting people.
Please don't, drug induced brain damage isn't fun.
So long as its mutual it seems to work out well ^^
>tfw emotional conversations with best friend usually contain some affirmation that we need each other to make it in our shitty broken lives
Haha, well, I'm in New Mexico, but not really ready for any kind of a relationship, my body grosses me out too much for any kind of intimacy with anybody at this point. Hopefully that will change as I get further into my transition, but possibly not. Sorry if I got your hopes up, I was just shitposting really; I hope you find someone, though.
>So long as its mutual it seems to work out well ^^
Until the other one decides they want support not another clingy partner. Then the whole thing collapses like a Chinese sky scraper.
I think you look pretty good, it might be angles. My first criticism of most girls though is pluck your fucking eyebrows. Id rather see them overplucked than underplucked. Im sure youll find some one, just give it time.
Yes, I'm saying her eyebrows are fine and far better than most. My apologies for being verbose.
although if we ever break up and she says im too clingy then id probably kill myself
i knew you would
bc you're smart kuppy
you wouldnt do something dumb like wait until you're 22 and have been kicked out of uni to transition just bc you hate yourselfd and you dont want to be anymore of a financial burden
good thing I can support her even when I feel like a steaming pile of shit
How long does voice training usually take? Due to living situations it will be another year or two before I can move out, and until then I don't want to start HRT. But I'd like to have voice done before that if possible.
It's very uncooperative most of the time, naturally wavy hair a shit ;_;
>tfw you resume the cycle of self destructive behavior
Definitely going down in flames
I don't think there's anything I havn't posted here at this point. I can't post my broken personality and demeanor though.
In a perfect world that wouldn't happen, but it seems to ;_;
Thanks. I dunno I'm hopeful that something happens soon, but in the meantime idk. Hard to have a lot of confidence given the circumstances.
>not dating anyone because you have no self esteem
>not being used till they get bored of you and either dump you or treat you like absolute shit hoping you'll leave them
>In a perfect world that wouldn't happen, but it seems to ;_;
ive practiced a little bit for the past half a year and I stilll sound awful normally
idc about whatever you said but if you dont start hormones in the next year im going to fly to australia and beat the shit out of you bc you deserve to be happy
ur beautiful okay shut up
i want to kiss all over your stupid face
low test means low conversion of calories to muscle so yeah kinda but not actual-really
get on estrogen if you want to convert those calories to a figure
sorry senpai i figured it was angie because franku... if you've experienced that kind of stuff then that sucks about as much as life sucks in general and that sucks
Tfw had hourglass-ish? figure already with slight T, but spiro rly didnt work for me. Like slowly each month it got less effective.
Maybe the muscles actually go away now though :3 and lol ew bloating, how to avoid that?
>he can sing in improv
What is this I don't even..
Yeah ;_; I have to straighten it to have it cooperate, and on days with no time for that it just looks crap.
How bad does it get for you when you need a haircut? When mine grows out the waves won't stay together and it turns into a frizzy mess.
Gem I.. .////.
Thanks. Idk, I really need to find a way not to see myself as being ugly.
Yeah, I know that feeling way too well. Still quite a bit less confident than pretransition, and a large amount of the confidence that I had came crashing down in may. Relying too much on a relationship for validation and confidence was a mistake.
Of course not silly, why would I kill the person I like?
oh my god do you not understand the entire point of the convention?
yea.... it helped knowing the language and being able to talk with a few of the sellers about their work but most of its a blurr to me now. good times...
Yeah, it pretty much entirely fixed the worst of the dysphoria at least. Life's still far from perfect though. I'm looking forward to the point when the laundry list of other mental issues that seem to come bundled with being trans can be resolved, but that's probably a long way off.
Recessive gene seemingly
>Decide to switch from estrofem to Progynova on QHI because its cheaper
>it tastes very sweet
>not sure if I got the real deal or some blue pilled sweets
I realized something last night
I want to date a trans girl
I want to start dating him pre op because I'm gay
It's OK because I told everyone I'm gay so it doesn't bother me animore
And if she wants me to never touch or acknowledge her penis that's OK I don't mind at al
And i want to help her transition because I also like women
And if at any point she wants to start wearing dresses around or anything like that I don't mind either, I will best up anyone who complains
I want to date mtf
I don't want to date men, they are whores
I don't want tondate women either
I don't want to become a trans myself
I want this because I have an enormous soft spot for trans people, I don't know why
And if this is what you want to hear that's good but if it isn't I don't care at all
>tfw gf and i want to move in together
>tfw neither of us even really understand how this works outside of being together and sharing chores
d-does she get student loans and then find a place with me alongside me working? how does this happen?
No you've got it wrong. All women are whores!
All women are whores, therefor you are all whores, discuss.
no, i explicitly stated that i desired to brush my teeth with a minigun, go choke on semen faggot
im gonna rub some lotion all over your face
but what about my desires, insect?
I can only pick out like 4 people in there. are most of them no longer here or just changed way too much to tell, I see kayla, moap, angie and edie
Yeah, I believe that as well. In all honesty, apart from the dysphoria and depression, I was pretty much all there when I first started. Years of bad experiences and unhealthy coping methods later though, not quite so much.
i'm /still wishes to die even though life isn't all that bad anymore/ ;)
>if I transition I will look like immortan joe
I feel like I haven't changed much in the past fifteen years or so. Aged a bit, less than I should have, gained a little in the breasts and butt department and that's all...
Those are the models that played Immortan Joe's bitches. Not exactly someone off the street
And you really got to step up your crazy game, you can't be triggered every time you spot a tall(er) girl.
Well, I still feel bad when I look at models, like any woman I'm afraid. But these days, with most random women my age? Can't help pick up the feeling of inadequacy in their eyes when they look at me, and I can't help smiling back.
I still feel like shit when I see myself in the mirror, but I'd have to be a bona fide 11 not to...
If you could change one thing about being trans, what would it be?
I probably just won't transition to avoid looking the same as I do now but with mild gyno. but if you're referring to yourself as an ugly old man I don't believe even pre hrt that you ever looked like an ugly old man, even so you do actually pass now even if you can't see it. are you sticking to a noncrash diet and exercising still?
not be trans
Tough question, I don't actually think I have an answer though, I think it's more that I just wish I didn't have to go through life this way.
I don't think wishing to be cisfemale is in the spirit of the question, but that's the answer I'd pick. Wishing that I were a cismale without gid, that feels like I'd effectively be removing myself from existence. Male me would probably be unrecognisable.
Well, then all of my past would have to have been very different, which makes the question pointless. Except for a not so long parenthesis, all of my life I've lived as a girl, thought as a girl and been mostly treated as one. It's not about being trans as a condition. From a psychosocial standpoint, all of my past has made me a woman. I'd suck at being a guy.
A bit of self-delusion here and there helps.
My upper body shape isn't too bad. Except my back is fucked up by years of slouching...
I generally assume I'd have been much happier, much more successful, and a lot more sane on both counts. The thought of a me that isn't emotionally stunted, damaged and drug dependent is a nice one, not in this lifetime though.
>tfw starting to come to grips with the fact that I am probably transexual
fuck, i'm scared
so um uh so we were talking about clown shoes and feet and like apparently i took bad pic so here ( tried my best and yup i need gym)
alsooo cringy and embarrassing story about clown shoes.
be me 3months ago, first time out as a girl, everything going well and such but later on i realized i wore super skinny jeans with converse AND they were high tops.
so what i had done was like hidden the upper part of the shoe under the jeans, so it literally looked like if i had two canoes as feet.
such is life w over sized feet and hon mind.
>tfw you'll never hug dreamy girl
>tfw Noun will never love you
>You find it easy to live as a guy now?
no. I hate myself to no end for being a freak, hence why I said it would be boss to be cis, it's more realistic to wish for cis male than for a reality where I'm female. I'm certain with the right meds it could be done
Thing is, until my late teens, I was one of the girls, no questions asked. I don't see how being a cis girl would have made that less likely. Well, maybe my other issues would have made me an outcast freak instead of an endearing one. The trans think made me special, no questions about that. It never did in a bad way in my early life, though.
i don't like the idea of a child being born to a transexual parent, doesn't seem fair to me
plus sperm banking is expeeeeensive, i likely won't find anyone willing to have children with me for another 10 years or more
Idk, I can only speak to my person experience. I entered college transitioning I'm still at the same college doing the same things I would otherwise be doing. I'm a junior now studying abroad like I always wanted to. I'll probably apply to some jobs or grad school the same as I would've otherwise. Family just treats it (trans) as a birth defect that needed medicine to fix. But to be fair I haven't lived my whole life so who knows. I might still get fucked
Well, I went to being very lonely with a job I hated to having friends for the first time in years and finding myself in a position to live my life getting a decent amount of money for nothing, and as such being able to spend my time on about anything I mind. And I have never felt as close to my parents before.
So, well, it doesn't feel that I'm just back on the main road. It's better than that. I'm beginning to feel alive. And that's very new to me. I'm not starting over. I'm starting, period. Ok, it's a bit late. But better than never.
>tfw i forgot to tell yume i was going to bed