>saving up money for hormones and laser
>won't be able to start those for a month at the very earliest, three-four months more realistic
>look like shit feel like shit
>trying not to throw up because of dysphoria
how do I fucking alleviate this
You don't, you're fucked. You're transgender and life is fucking terrible now.
Just play video-games and sleep a lot like I do. Takes away the time you can spend thinking about how fucked you really are.
Also lose weight immediately, as it helps a lot to stay underweight for a good part of HRT, before moving up to normal weight to get some feminine fat.
You're not going to fucking OD on weed. Don't be stupid. Just stay high to the point where you feel dissociated from your body all the time until you can start hormones. You can even throw in some benzos, opiates, and cold medicine and stay in a perpetual state of semi-consciousness where you barely even feel like you have a body. It's great! That's what I did for years, and I'm an excellent role model.
I'm not OP, and I don't use weed (I hate the smell and I really don't like spending money). I was just curious since I heard marijuana makes you pass out before you can OD on it when you smoke it, and I also heard that you can get a longer lasting high from baking it into food. So "Would ingesting lots of marijuana in your food kill you?" is the question that arises.
No. Even if you used extremely concentrated, high-THC product to cook with and used a lot of it, you wouldn't end up dead. There are "marijuana-RELATED" deaths, but there aren't any cases of deaths due solely to marijuana overdose.
>1 month at the earliest
>3-4 months realistically
>HOW DO I NOT KILL MYSELF WHILE WAITING? X(
That is not a lot of time, figure out how to resolve your shitty millennial entitlement complex and put the wait in perspective with the difference it's going to make to your life.
You're a fucking dipshit, fuck you.