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You are currently reading a thread in /lgbt/ - Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender

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>be me
>not really manly
>still living with parents (yes im young)
>allways tought of being a girl (since 8)
>started dating a boy
>started following the "trap mode aesthetics diet" because bf liked traps
>starts considering myself trans
>my name is now "Loren"
>broke up
>still making the diet because wanted to be a girl so badly
>very fucking hard because parents really like beef,they don't let me have long hair,nor shave
>obviously conservative parents
>cant tell them about transsexuality
>no money
>cant buy hormones
>get new bf
>he is the only reason i live nowadays
>dont think the diet is working
>mother notices because she hates me complaining about life
>very cool guy
>he cheers me up about transsexuality
>random day mother asks about what i talk in the psychologist
>she forces me to talk
>"i wanna be a girl"
>"i know that"
>she wants to put my father in the middle of the thing
>she says its just a phase
>father is less conservative
>he agrees with my mother anyway
>secretly he helped me a bit, only buying chicken
>ok so far
>mother cancels psychologist because he was helping me
>she stalks me and finds out im dating with a man
>she calls the cops
>"i will send the cops to his house if you dont stop with that gay shit"
>agrees and stops
>tfw grounded
>months after i get back to internet
>obviously talks to bf
>its all ok between us again
>mother is still a shit
>father says "some say you will leave this house and do what you want so there is no point to keeping you from it,but i cant help you anymore"
>still not feeling girly enough
>i wanna shave but i cant
>i wanna left home but im still on second year of high school
Someone please help,i still dont have money to buy anything and all i can do is eat chicken and drink my own semen

its me on the drawing, my friend made to me, i really dont like to show myself-

i re wrote this a gazillion times because my english sucks, so, sorry for anything
You could try to convince your father (or any other family member, if you have a sister or a brother) to support you against your mother, because if your father helped you before, with enough talking, he could possibly help you now.
i have a sister, shes only 7 tho

And i said once something "related",and he replyed with a no because she would break up with him
Why would he stay with her anyways? She sounds like a huge pain in the ass for the whole family.

desu he complains A LOT about her, but still he says "i dont regret anything"

must be because he had a fucking stroke and nobody helped him besides my mother
I would call you a fucking weaboo for using "desu" all of the sudden, but you probably don't deserve this shit.
Anyways, does your father accept you having a boyfriend? If so, he is quite the cool guy, compared to your shitty ass mother.
This is what you do
>You sit down with your mother
>You tell her what is going to happen
>tell her your demands
>Tell her that if she does not co-op with your demands when you leave you will never see her again and that she will be pretty much dead to you
>See how she reacts and go to a family therapist and get rid of her transphobia
>If it doesn't work out (the sit down) don't show any emotion just leave go up to your room. Stop calling her mom and call her by her given name and when you leave for college. Never communicate with her again (AKA she's dead to you)

I know I'm being rude, but you don't need people in your life that will only pull you down
This is a little too revanchist for my taste.

OP, what you need is are cheap hormones until you can escape your family.


Bicalutamide is an anti-androgen, dose is about 50mg daily, you can literally buy it by the kilogram.

After a few months, get yourself a synthetic estrogen if you can.
(i lost air from laughing because i dont know where that desu came from)

on the day my mother called the police he said something like "i really dont like you dating a boy,if you wanna date one do it AWAY"
The mother does not have no options in this case. She can torment OP if she chooses. This isn't wise.
man... so when i was that age, had something similar. i acted up at school. got sent to psych / therapists. so if you want back to the psych, that's one way. if you go that route, group session with your parents to get their reaction / a discussion going with a paid professional mediator. if they threaten or whatever, bam dcf they get fucked. maybe you go to a group home or something, but importantly you get an opportunity to get help sooner rather then later.

i know you might be scared. it's ok. that route sucks too.

another option, which equally blows, is to wait until 18, get a job at a place that offers health insurance to full-time employees, then go get help on your own with your money. this option however, means not being a little bitch and learning two things. patience and discipline. it means sucking it the fuck up and dealing with your parents, their rules so follow them if you want to live with them cause group homes blow. do your fucking chores. do what they ask of you. they dont want you doing gay shit, guess what: you livin on the DL now. don't get caught. more importantly though, try to help out more around the house. try to build a better relationship with your parents. offer to help make dinner. set the table. do the dishes. help with laundry. clean shit. DO GOOD IN FUCKING SCHOOL. that way it's easier for them to learn to cope with having a trans child. yea. this isnt about you. well sort of. it's about you're parents too. remember they didnt sign up for this ride. it's stressful for them just as much as it is for you. they know how hard life can be, especially for people that are different. there isnt a good role model for the community in media either. the limited exposure pushes a biast on them as well. on top of that, they dont know how to help or what it all means. they may not know how to get you help. they maybe afraid of letting you make the wrong decision.
Shit, at least he didn't try to call the police.
Still, does he hate your boyfriend? And what about your boyfriend? Does he give you support, and help you as much as he can?
I actually said i was gonna commit suicide on the day of the cops, she didn't care at all
because she sees through your bullshit. stop acting out and being a little shit. show some respect for your parents instead of being so ungrateful. suck it up. 18 is not as long a wait as you think.
What the fuck
Don't they have some sort of law against this sort of parent abuse in your country? If so, shit like this could get her arrested.
No daughter or son should be treated as coldly as this, no matter their gender or sexual orientation.
I really cant work to buy this sadly, and no i cant have one dolar, a dolar is worth 4 ( almost five) brazillian reais

I have my whole day occupied too so i cant really work
I think OP has enough reasons to be ungrateful, considering how much OP's life was fucked up because of the mother.
my bf is nice,he helps me and lot and i love him

as i said early my english sucks so hes helping me in the right english btw

Being homophobic here is a crime, but she's the only one in the house who works, so if she gets arrested, we'll probably starve.
Doens't the government give some financial support to families in very specific situations like this? When the only worker in the house gets arrested and stuff.

nowadays im like a maid to them really,i always did really good on school

Actually i was like the best child to my mother and father

No shit,and my father cant pay all the bills with only his retirement money alone
Damn, so i guess one of the solutions is like the other guy said before, treating you mother coldly, calling her by her name, etc
Also, how old is your boyfriend? If he's old enough to be able to buy a house and sustain both of you, you could try running away from home or something.
why? because his mother doesnt support his life choices and isnt allowing them to transition? stop being such an entitled tumblr faggot.

the mother is scared
the mother doesnt know if this is actually a phase or the reality of it.
the mother doesnt want to make the wrong decision, so she does nothing.
OP's parents support OP to go to school, provide shelter, food, clothes, and dont seem to have rules that are terribly harsh.

sounds like op is in brazil. sounds like things not so bad. suck it up, do well in school. get a decent job.

would you rather op get fucked and end up a sex worker or something?

He's only 16 (he will be 17 this year) so yeah, he cant help me escape
Does he plan to get a house when turning 18, or will he wait a few more years? Also, does his parents know about you?

Actually mother is convinced that this is a phase because "my brain isnt developed 100%"

Harsh rules include that i NEED to hang out with her every day
all the money i get somehow, goes to her
i have to get a gf
in public i need to have X attitude,using X clothes,when talking to her i need to call her miss" not Mother,mom,or anything (applies when im at home too)

Yes im from brazil

things are actually shit because we need to live with only 1000 Reais per month which is a very low amount, considering we are 4 family members
can you get money and hide it from her?

He plans to get out of home as soon as possible,then yes,and when his parents found out about me he got grounded too, so yeah

She usually searches my room for suspicious shit,so i cant hide money

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>all i can do is eat chicken and drink my own semen
you need a friend then, who you can see regularly. who can hide things for you and buy things for you.

i have like

one friend on school,who has trans tendencies but hes scared that his mother or father could be like my mother

so anyway,i could really do it,but again,all the money are random coins i find on the street,but,if i get a good amount i could ask him for help
cause she knew you were going to wus out
I would think the exact same thing
good get a gf. why? because you need to learn how to socialize as a female and how female interact with their female friends. it shouldn't be too big a deal really.

she's afraid she's losing her son, her golden child. she's afraid of who this new person could be. you have to show her, hey this is just how I am, but it's ok i still love you guys and i'm still your golden child.

yes you have to wear the clothes she provides for you, yes you need to be polite / cordial / socialable with your parents. can you specify how she wants you to act?
how do you have access to a computer and a significant amount of free time...?

Probably (?) i could really do it tho, i tought i was never going to see my bf again so nothing really mattered

I guess i could get a gf,but my bf wouldnt let that happen for sure

i tried to act like if it was all ok about me being like this,i wouldnt change anything to them but the bible says that there is only a man an woman,and because god made me like this i need to be this forever

Ok,about me acting, imagine a british soldier stereotype, you can fucking kick my face, but i cant say anything or do anything

Thanks to my father i can use the pc,but,considering how much i need to go and do shit for them sometimes its not even worth turning the pc on

I was supposed to be sleeping now but i was really feeling like shit and needed help
what about browsing history and shit >_>
Is your boyfriend that important to you that you would kill yourself if being with him was not possible anymore? If so, that's quite the love.
Also, does your boyfriend make you happy, do you think you made the right choice to continue talking to him even after what happened?
Inject alcohol into your testicles.
They'll die fairly quickly and stop producing testosterone.

He really is very important to me, my life is pretty empty without him

I think im doing the right thing,i dont regret my love for him and what i am doing right now, im just trying to be happy and to make him happy

he makes me so happy that i cant even describe it,i really cant live without him

ok thanks

Actually i try drinking as much as i can but its hard

i never said i cant use it
you must understand the severity of what i'm suggesting.

your testicles will slowly wither over the course of six months, most likely. the alcohol you inject should be fairly pure. try vodka. go slow. it will hurt. drink some first.
But, how does he treat you? Does he respect your decisions?
I'm sorry I'm asking this kind of thing, I'm just really curi

i know it works and etc but

i just really cant "get vodka" "get syringe" (mostly because my parents dont drink)

I probably dont have THE BALLS to do it too,but if that where my last resort guess i would

oh,its ok for you to ask

uhh,he treats me very nicely and cute,mostly he makes the decisions,but when i make he respects them
buying meds without a physician approval is a good way to get a blood clot anyways.

please never buy drugs without the consent of a doctor and even then get regular blood checks
Do you guys date by internet, or have you met each other irl? And...have you guys ever kissed or anything like that?

Yeah,i always knew the danger about blood clots,another problem for me buying stuff

we first met on the internet,but one day we met each other and had a great day with a little kiss in the end
That's...very cute, actually.
All relationships i recently had ended when i mentioned transsexuality, you're quite lucky to have someone that accepts you for who you are at your side.

Oh,im sorry for you, i hope you find someone that accepts you too, i really wish i could show you some of my friends,but y'know
It's the world filter, if you type "desu" it turns into desu.
famalamalam i've been trying to figure this out. are you the one who successfully ordered alibaba bicalutamide? please respond. i want a good vendor

this >>5605517 is probably not the best idea unless you have an income or a place to live because you might get kicked out

So,according to the rest of the thread and my life im only on 2nd year of high school so its basically impossible for me to get out
Basically unless you're 18 you won't be able to do informed consent in most places as far as I know. 18 isn't a terrible age to transition at imo, but earlier is better always. People have shitty circumstances sometimes.

Hope it somehow works out but otherwise you'll just have to wait a bit..

I heard it would be good for me to begin doing it as soon as possible,but i really cant do much more from the diet
before you try anything dire like transition try moving somewhere more gay friendly first. or just... anywhere that doesnt suck holy hell. your mom is a huge asshole

In my city (curitiba), normally the folks are pretty cool about that, on my school for example,even my teachers respect that kind of thing, I'm just THAT unlucky to have been born from this kind of mother.

It's all her fault in the end i think
Não sei como funciona no Brasil mas boa sorte anon.
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Escrevi em português sem motivo.
If you ask your dad to buy you hormones do you think he will?
You're aware brazil is the country ranked number 1 in murders of trans people, right?
I think the US are second :^)
I can't find my source right now, so I can't confirm the second place right now. :/
Besides that depressing info, well Loren, you could look on curitiba's local LGBT help group by contacting then by email and checking if they have any way to personally help you.
Try contacting www.grupodignidade.org.br, they're from your city and could have some way to help you even get goverment help with transition, as it's an posibility you can get at your local Posto de saude, it's free, but to get it it's a fucking fight, since the workers at those places are untrained and most of the times won't know what you're talking about, so make sure you get help, or find a trans friend who already went through it to help and guide you, a trans-mom like some would call their.
The whole mom situation is shit, I'm kinda on the same boat right now, so look into what you can do with the little I could give here. :/

Probably no

Also,i need a physicial approval and shit

Dont think its the rank number one,but im aware that a lot o people get killed here

i really dont like this country on lots of points, but, in curitiba i think i will be safe from that

(at least i hope so)

Thank you so much for that, i never even heard about this NGO,really really thank you

Atm i dont know anyone that went through all this,only people like me that have problems with their families, but i will check out if someone on my facebook's friends list knows someone that got through it all
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