>not really manly
>still living with parents (yes im young)
>allways tought of being a girl (since 8)
>started dating a boy
>started following the "trap mode aesthetics diet" because bf liked traps
>starts considering myself trans
>my name is now "Loren"
>still making the diet because wanted to be a girl so badly
>very fucking hard because parents really like beef,they don't let me have long hair,nor shave
>obviously conservative parents
>cant tell them about transsexuality
>cant buy hormones
>get new bf
>he is the only reason i live nowadays
>dont think the diet is working
>mother notices because she hates me complaining about life
>very cool guy
>he cheers me up about transsexuality
>random day mother asks about what i talk in the psychologist
>she forces me to talk
>"i wanna be a girl"
>"i know that"
>she wants to put my father in the middle of the thing
>she says its just a phase
>father is less conservative
>he agrees with my mother anyway
>secretly he helped me a bit, only buying chicken
>ok so far
>mother cancels psychologist because he was helping me
>she stalks me and finds out im dating with a man
>she calls the cops
>"i will send the cops to his house if you dont stop with that gay shit"
>agrees and stops
>months after i get back to internet
>obviously talks to bf
>its all ok between us again
>mother is still a shit
>father says "some say you will leave this house and do what you want so there is no point to keeping you from it,but i cant help you anymore"
>still not feeling girly enough
>i wanna shave but i cant
>i wanna left home but im still on second year of high school
Someone please help,i still dont have money to buy anything and all i can do is eat chicken and drink my own semen
its me on the drawing, my friend made to me, i really dont like to show myself-
i re wrote this a gazillion times because my english sucks, so, sorry for anything
You could try to convince your father (or any other family member, if you have a sister or a brother) to support you against your mother, because if your father helped you before, with enough talking, he could possibly help you now.
I would call you a fucking weaboo for using "desu" all of the sudden, but you probably don't deserve this shit.
Anyways, does your father accept you having a boyfriend? If so, he is quite the cool guy, compared to your shitty ass mother.
This is what you do
>You sit down with your mother
>You tell her what is going to happen
>tell her your demands
>Tell her that if she does not co-op with your demands when you leave you will never see her again and that she will be pretty much dead to you
>See how she reacts and go to a family therapist and get rid of her transphobia
>If it doesn't work out (the sit down) don't show any emotion just leave go up to your room. Stop calling her mom and call her by her given name and when you leave for college. Never communicate with her again (AKA she's dead to you)
I know I'm being rude, but you don't need people in your life that will only pull you down
This is a little too revanchist for my taste.
OP, what you need is are cheap hormones until you can escape your family.
Bicalutamide is an anti-androgen, dose is about 50mg daily, you can literally buy it by the kilogram.
After a few months, get yourself a synthetic estrogen if you can.
(i lost air from laughing because i dont know where that desu came from)
on the day my mother called the police he said something like "i really dont like you dating a boy,if you wanna date one do it AWAY"
man... so when i was that age, had something similar. i acted up at school. got sent to psych / therapists. so if you want back to the psych, that's one way. if you go that route, group session with your parents to get their reaction / a discussion going with a paid professional mediator. if they threaten or whatever, bam dcf they get fucked. maybe you go to a group home or something, but importantly you get an opportunity to get help sooner rather then later.
i know you might be scared. it's ok. that route sucks too.
another option, which equally blows, is to wait until 18, get a job at a place that offers health insurance to full-time employees, then go get help on your own with your money. this option however, means not being a little bitch and learning two things. patience and discipline. it means sucking it the fuck up and dealing with your parents, their rules so follow them if you want to live with them cause group homes blow. do your fucking chores. do what they ask of you. they dont want you doing gay shit, guess what: you livin on the DL now. don't get caught. more importantly though, try to help out more around the house. try to build a better relationship with your parents. offer to help make dinner. set the table. do the dishes. help with laundry. clean shit. DO GOOD IN FUCKING SCHOOL. that way it's easier for them to learn to cope with having a trans child. yea. this isnt about you. well sort of. it's about you're parents too. remember they didnt sign up for this ride. it's stressful for them just as much as it is for you. they know how hard life can be, especially for people that are different. there isnt a good role model for the community in media either. the limited exposure pushes a biast on them as well. on top of that, they dont know how to help or what it all means. they may not know how to get you help. they maybe afraid of letting you make the wrong decision.
because she sees through your bullshit. stop acting out and being a little shit. show some respect for your parents instead of being so ungrateful. suck it up. 18 is not as long a wait as you think.
What the fuck
Don't they have some sort of law against this sort of parent abuse in your country? If so, shit like this could get her arrested.
No daughter or son should be treated as coldly as this, no matter their gender or sexual orientation.
Damn, so i guess one of the solutions is like the other guy said before, treating you mother coldly, calling her by her name, etc
Also, how old is your boyfriend? If he's old enough to be able to buy a house and sustain both of you, you could try running away from home or something.
why? because his mother doesnt support his life choices and isnt allowing them to transition? stop being such an entitled tumblr faggot.
the mother is scared
the mother doesnt know if this is actually a phase or the reality of it.
the mother doesnt want to make the wrong decision, so she does nothing.
OP's parents support OP to go to school, provide shelter, food, clothes, and dont seem to have rules that are terribly harsh.
sounds like op is in brazil. sounds like things not so bad. suck it up, do well in school. get a decent job.
would you rather op get fucked and end up a sex worker or something?
Actually mother is convinced that this is a phase because "my brain isnt developed 100%"
Harsh rules include that i NEED to hang out with her every day
all the money i get somehow, goes to her
i have to get a gf
in public i need to have X attitude,using X clothes,when talking to her i need to call her miss" not Mother,mom,or anything (applies when im at home too)
Yes im from brazil
things are actually shit because we need to live with only 1000 Reais per month which is a very low amount, considering we are 4 family members
>all i can do is eat chicken and drink my own semen
i have like
one friend on school,who has trans tendencies but hes scared that his mother or father could be like my mother
so anyway,i could really do it,but again,all the money are random coins i find on the street,but,if i get a good amount i could ask him for help
good get a gf. why? because you need to learn how to socialize as a female and how female interact with their female friends. it shouldn't be too big a deal really.
she's afraid she's losing her son, her golden child. she's afraid of who this new person could be. you have to show her, hey this is just how I am, but it's ok i still love you guys and i'm still your golden child.
yes you have to wear the clothes she provides for you, yes you need to be polite / cordial / socialable with your parents. can you specify how she wants you to act?
I guess i could get a gf,but my bf wouldnt let that happen for sure
i tried to act like if it was all ok about me being like this,i wouldnt change anything to them but the bible says that there is only a man an woman,and because god made me like this i need to be this forever
Ok,about me acting, imagine a british soldier stereotype, you can fucking kick my face, but i cant say anything or do anything
Thanks to my father i can use the pc,but,considering how much i need to go and do shit for them sometimes its not even worth turning the pc on
I was supposed to be sleeping now but i was really feeling like shit and needed help
Is your boyfriend that important to you that you would kill yourself if being with him was not possible anymore? If so, that's quite the love.
Also, does your boyfriend make you happy, do you think you made the right choice to continue talking to him even after what happened?
He really is very important to me, my life is pretty empty without him
I think im doing the right thing,i dont regret my love for him and what i am doing right now, im just trying to be happy and to make him happy
he makes me so happy that i cant even describe it,i really cant live without him
you must understand the severity of what i'm suggesting.
your testicles will slowly wither over the course of six months, most likely. the alcohol you inject should be fairly pure. try vodka. go slow. it will hurt. drink some first.
i know it works and etc but
i just really cant "get vodka" "get syringe" (mostly because my parents dont drink)
I probably dont have THE BALLS to do it too,but if that where my last resort guess i would
That's...very cute, actually.
All relationships i recently had ended when i mentioned transsexuality, you're quite lucky to have someone that accepts you for who you are at your side.
Basically unless you're 18 you won't be able to do informed consent in most places as far as I know. 18 isn't a terrible age to transition at imo, but earlier is better always. People have shitty circumstances sometimes.
Hope it somehow works out but otherwise you'll just have to wait a bit..
In my city (curitiba), normally the folks are pretty cool about that, on my school for example,even my teachers respect that kind of thing, I'm just THAT unlucky to have been born from this kind of mother.
It's all her fault in the end i think
Besides that depressing info, well Loren, you could look on curitiba's local LGBT help group by contacting then by email and checking if they have any way to personally help you.
Try contacting www.grupodignidade.org.br, they're from your city and could have some way to help you even get goverment help with transition, as it's an posibility you can get at your local Posto de saude, it's free, but to get it it's a fucking fight, since the workers at those places are untrained and most of the times won't know what you're talking about, so make sure you get help, or find a trans friend who already went through it to help and guide you, a trans-mom like some would call their.
The whole mom situation is shit, I'm kinda on the same boat right now, so look into what you can do with the little I could give here. :/
Dont think its the rank number one,but im aware that a lot o people get killed here
i really dont like this country on lots of points, but, in curitiba i think i will be safe from that
(at least i hope so)
Thank you so much for that, i never even heard about this NGO,really really thank you
Atm i dont know anyone that went through all this,only people like me that have problems with their families, but i will check out if someone on my facebook's friends list knows someone that got through it all