Staring into darkness because I cant sleep edition
▶Informed Consent Providers: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/932389/Trans/Stepping%20Forward%20-%20Informed%20Conent%20Clinics.pdf
▶infographs suck for makeup
▶Trans Info Dump: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1d9KKqP9IHa5ZxU84a_Jf0vIAh7e8nj_lCW27KbYBh0/edit?usp=sharing
▶Size charts: http://www.americanapparel.net/sizing/default.asp?chart=womens.pantse_conversion_chart.php
I just want to be a girl
▶Transition timelines: http://imgur.com/a/qWpxv
▶Voice Training: http://pastebin.com/dgipdsge
▶HRT info: https://web.archive.rg/web/0000000000000 http://taimapedia.org/index.php?title=Hormones
▶Voice Help: http://webjedi.net/projects/lgbtq/speech-therapy/
▶Discord server: https://discord.gg/0XFIQ4xa7Rd9noam
▶MTFG Radio https://www.dubtack.fm/join/mtfg
▶IRC: https://www.rizon.net/chat #mtfg
Previous thread >>5578505
>tfw i know some of you are posting in my thread on r9k right now
HI evert body! My name is Tanisha I'm a new a gurrl on teh block ans I'm hoping you gals cans shows me a ting two about being a womynz and how to make my black ancestors proud. Thx. Bai.
Do I win? My transition fails most huh?
I worry that Im just a transtrender. I mean I want to be a girl. I really always have. I just never really started thinking about it much until the past year or so. But what about all those years secretly cross dressing... what am I.
>you as a person confound me
how come o-o
Yeah I've been doing this a lot the past couple days
I upped my E dose and think I'm going a LITTLE crazy so I apologize.
whoa wacky thread especially that anon that gave huggge replies trying to give kind of weird advice
Probably trans desu !
Alright, I know I have to shave for a full laser session, but what about the patch test? Should I just shave a small area of the neck or something? And should it be a close razor shave or will just trimming it real short do? Or does shaving not matter for patch test?
youre so contradictory
your attitude, your logic, your reaction to people calling you shitty for being raped? its so fucking baffling
im very concerned for your mental health and puzzled beyond belief, how someone could feel the way you do
like, fuck. people are fucking insane
I'll send my train down ur tunnel :3
They make me feel like a gross hon tho ;~;
Ok I'll wear a plaid shirt
Do not sexualise the awoo!
The dress is too big, I was worried about it being too small so I bought a huge one
luckily you don't need to know because you're not one
idk I thought my reaction was pretty ordinary for that
I really don't understand myself at ALL so this is kinda helpful to me thanks
>people are fucking insane
yeh I prolly am t b h
I'm curious what my attitude and logic and stuff is tho !!
Just tell him u wanted to copy me then come glomp me ^ _ ^
lmk when u find out ok I need advice
i dont know what to make of you
why do you keep this cutesy anime bullshit persona up
doesnt it make you feel bad to know people think youre a whore after seeing so many pics of you? just how do you live with so many things to be ashamed of?
Idk t b h I don't deal w/ it well
>why do you keep this cutesy anime bullshit persona up
I don't really think it's a persona it's kind of just how I act o-o
before I came here I typed a lot more fem w/ more emotes (I know, that's hard to do)
>doesnt it make you feel bad to know people think youre a whore after seeing so many pics of you?
Yeh, little bit. The people I really care about and cherish as friends don't care I made a dumb mistake though
>just how do you live with so many things to be ashamed of?
By keeping up this "cutesy anime persona" and trying to make others happy.
My life is a worthless mess and if I can give someone nice advice or make them smile or something before I kmy then I at least have that to cope with
how to deal with wanting to hurt myself because I will never be a cis girl?
A whore of your caliber wouldn't be ashamed of being a one and that makes me wonder what is bad enough that you would feel shame like a normal human being. Did you sell your little brothers anal virginity for a crack rock or something?
I know life's been so far from good, but it's not that, you have a lot of time ahead of you and I'll be here, okay? I don't really think most people can have some kind of totally ideal life
but it'll definitely be worth it.
Get some good rest bebby, go easy on yourself tomorrow
night night for real now, love you to bits
when you learn to be an adult anon you learn to just fucking do something, even if you hate it and dont want to do it, you just fucking do it
it's like like, you calm down and dry your tears and just do it
I don't really know what you're getting at, but skulls don't have that many gender-specific features, only different proportions and whatnot. There's this one MtF I know who looked like skeletor before transitioning and now he looks like skeletor with make-up.
I don't like greentexting but it's appropriate now.
Good morning everyone.
I am awful at haikus.
Angie is gorgeous.
( ﾟ∀ﾟ)人(ﾟ∀ﾟ )
alright now with my autism out of my system how is everyone doing? anyone have a nice dream lately?
Bad. If you ever stay with me you'll learn quick that I'm anvannoying sleeper. I dont snore or anything but i sleep in the skinny and i need to have some form of comedy playing while i sleep or i have nightmares. Well i fell asleep without putting anything on last night.
aw. i used to need a movie to sleep too during highschool. i've seen inception like 200 times because of it. i don't think ihave many sleeping quirks. i guess i can only sleep on my side. i also put my pillow on my arm and rest my head on my arm.
i guess it explains how you didn't choke on gum though. what's your stance on waking up other people in the morning? i always feel like an asshole when i sleep in, i feel like i'm wasting the others persons time when they have to sit there waiting for me.
if you treat me like utter shit and don't even apologize, don't expect to lay a finger on me unless you want it broken. i mean it was rare but still.
>how do i become not trans.
You can't. You don't have to transition, but you're basically down to coping strategies if you really intend not to transition in some way. Is HRT not going to help you?
You could get an orchi. Should substantially reduce T such that erections are less likely to happen spontaneously. That should eventually make your penis smaller.
The people over on /d/ suggest that keeping yourself in chastity for extended periods might also help.
So, they put a lock on the main door of the womens locker room that locks on the inside.
I only share it with one girl and desu, shes been drunk in her undies in my bed before so no big deal.
However, the male admins saw it necessary to put the lock on and, as far as i can tell, transphobia is at play, like they think im trying to see all the girlies giblets while anyone is changing.
Hell, i walked in on my friend once when she just had on undies and a big t shirt. She squeeled, but only because she didnt know who it was. Afterwards, i rolled my eyes and walked past her to pee. Non issue.
So, wtf,.... should i press this topic with the butthurt middle aged white men?
I am 20 and masculine as anyone else. It would be pretty disgusting seeing me trying to be a girl.
Yeah I tried coping strategies and that led to an addiction and suicide attempt.
Just wishing there was some way to literally erase these thoughts and feels from my mind.
well please wake me up whenever you wake up. i legitimately got into an argument because my friend was like 'hey we need to go out tomorrow' and i said 'okay, just wake me up in the morning so we can go.' but instead she just lets me sleep in until like 4PM then gives me the silent treatment and fullblown yells at me when i ask her what's wrong. like, how the fuck is that on me?
I'm pretty much the same but 25, as everything in the brain is governed by chemicals there's probably a way to suppress that part of the brain that causes transgenderism.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8839957 this carries little weight because it wasn't tested again but you could always try and debate the use of that anti schizo med to a psyche and see for yourself
Then you're down to transition. Sorry. The good news is you, like most 20 year olds, are probably going to do just fine with transitioning. Unless not being pretty is a cause for suicide, since passing as a pretty girl is much harder than passing.
I have some certification coming up that needs to be done as fast as possible. Otherwise I would be playing Dankest Dungeon. Real life won't let me neet.
My near future doesn't make me happy, nothing can, but it would make anyone normal pretty happy. Getting retired at 41 with a pension in the highest earning decile is pretty good. I might even play some video games. Probably waste a lot of time playing the Sims or chatting in a random MMO...
I seriously miss real coffee. They'll only let us have root chicory since all non-prescribed psychoactive substances except tobacco are banned since this is a rehab clinic. And I stopped tobacco since I'm getting SRS soon, so...
by "good company", i have the pleasure of spending time with a schizophrenic 6'6 forest troll with an amish beard who is absolutely adamant that his "device" made out of twisted wire in the shape of an ankh, "powered" by the heat of his cigarette stub, generates enough charge to ionize the sky and clear the clouds.
i had lentil curry for lunch. it was nice. it is always nice.
Almost starved myself to death following occupational burnout. I asked to be sent here instead of a public psychiatric hospital when I was at the ER. That was nine months ago. But the food isn't too bad and my room is larger and more comfortable than most hotel rooms, so I won't complain.
Oh, I'm not going to get better. The melancholic depression and PTSD are here to stay and are getting me closer to a sizeable disability pension everyday. And in the meanwhile, I'll be seeing Chett in May for SRS and a bit of FFS...
I liked anime when I was a kid, but I can't really see myself watching that now...
We don't need to voice chat, anon. Haha that's funny though.. neither have i...
Sounds kinda fun desu. Think of them as a character not someone you have to put up with! My coworkers are all boring as frick. This redneck high schooler surprised me the other day though when he started defending lgbt rights. I think everyone just thinks im gay. What a surprise they're in for.
Dont joke about that.
>hanging out with best friend last night because i hate my parents and didn't want to go home
>laughs are had at his expense for saying things that could be misconstrued as romantic interest
>it starts to get late and i mention that i should probably go home
>he starts talking about how i don't need to go home at all, that i could just stay with him
>i bring up reasons that wouldn't work, logistically
>he agrees, but says i belong with him anyway
i am super confused and i didn't have any comeback because i just realized what happened
don't worry, there will be plenty of time to sleep forever once you die of natural causes in your old age.
in the grand scheme of things, life is barely a blink of an eye. don't be in a rush to leave so soon. but if you do, make a huge fucking mess. trespass on government property and spill your guts everywhere while screaming your manifesto.
i mean the thing is after several months, the novelty kinda wears off and it's just par for the course.
>This redneck high schooler surprised me the other day though when he started defending lgbt rights.
>Accidentally break favorite neck chain when playing with it with brutish ape hands.
R I P
Starvation diet log day 2
haven't eaten one calorie
feels like I am dead all over
y u do stuff like dis.
huh i wouldn't go that far desu, just acknowledge that guilt by association is a bs way of judging people and it's wrong to assume that just because they hold objectionable views on one hand doesn't mean they're going to be a dick about other stuff eg lgbt people.
like, if my skinhead friend openly voiced support for lgbt people good on him for being a decent human being, but i wouldn't give him a congratulatory blowjob lol.
because of its versatility.
it can be eaten on its own as a snack.
you can make apple pie or apple crumble with it.
you can make applesauce with it to eat with pork.
you can press it and make nice juice.
you can ferment that juice and make nice hard cider.
what's not to love?
> I am a pure angel and I've never had sex.
okay good keep it that way please
you're one the better trips and i don't want my opinion of you to be tainted by things that im hoping wont start to be seen as generic traits of mtfs (extreme horniness)
keep your heart pure. don't focus on quantity of people to care for, focus on the quality of your appreciation for those you have already. that is how the strongest bonds are made.
for me, the texture. but i am hypersensitive to textures overall and don't eat a lot of foods due to the debilitation.
Yeah I get that, me too senpai, but at least make rational plans to solve them. I hate my nose but I'm not going to grab a machine grinder and start trying to fuck that shit up on my own. Eating disorders are bad. Just eat less than your TDEE or just increase your TDEE senpai.
>tfw you have a dream about having a bf
>mfw i realize it was a dream
>tfw no dream
>tfw woke up to dad plinging on my door
>tfw he will never comment on my feminine hair or boobs
It's like I still look extremely masculine ;_;
>tfw literally everyone ever genders me MAN
He's like 44.
I guess i'm just way too manly or something ;-;
>I know what I'm doing
>If it doesn't work out
Also pls don't die.
Don't waste anymore time
yeah, i just sorta like that one. the placement of everything is like almost perfect for feels posting imo.
>tfw your dad never says anything about it ever
>tfw your mom keeps talking about it
it's confusing to go from "lol u have bobs" to "hello son."
you got this alberto barbosa. you wuz kingz, now you can be queenz.
I started at 19 and turned out OK. The best time is always asap.
Still unwavering in your belief that you're a hon I see?
Even more now tbhon, didn't realize just how bad my jaw was before people told me.
I dunno, I could just stay neet.
No one can see how manly I am when i'm in my neet cave.
But then you'd still be stuck in this depressive state.
Perhaps with the alternative, you'd have a shot a happiness.
want soft feet?
be a neet.
there isn't a day that goes by i don't do at least a little trudging around in my hiking boots, even if it's just walking the dog or doing a spot of gardening. it's not as bad as when i've been in fulltime work, but the soles of my feet are like boiled leather and the tops of them are all jagged and bony.
Start putting yourself out there
Begin looking for a job.
You're never gonna be happy if you continue day this path.
You have two options at this point:
1) Break neethood and get a job. Save for FFS, get it and live as a girl.
2) Stay in this state, in which in the not too distant future, you'll either off yourself or still be posting on this thread.
Which future do you like better?
How do I figure out if i'm delusional though?
People who have seen me say the most unrealistic shit, except for one person.
yeh at least i'm self aware enough to realise this is largely the case with me too.
but my first ever job set my expectations way too high for what to expect in the workplace. it was a small company, i was one of 4 employees and every single one of us was a hard grafter and brought something unique to the table.
then i worked other jobs in bigger organisations and the shitty attitude and lack of work ethic of my colleagues pissed me off so much that i lost my temper with them and walked out on the job.
dw familam, already popping them on the daily aha
Strangers don't talk to me and my mom and shrink hugboxes me.
>tfw you're trying to grow your hair long and keep frying the ends
>Surely someone's hiring
In my area its only marketing and finance jobs and I don't have a degree in that field. I am sure I can do it but I really don't want to wear a suit and deal with people. I did just apply to home depot corporate to order bulk items for each store in the so cal area and I applied to Mercedes as a parts counter person which I can totally do. Besides that I can't find anything else.
You're probably not a hyper masculine man beast like me so girlmode is actually possible ;_;
post songs that make u cri everytim
Tears me apart but I'll make it home one day.
It's true for me thooooo, you would agree if you saw my jaw/chin and eyes.
damn this article is fucking interesting
>Were you not planning to move out of your area?
No, I am stuck here because I like my clinic and my electrolysis place. The goal is to get a job, get a small apartment, and just work and save and do electrolysis all this year. If all goes well by December I might have enough to do my brow bossing and a nose job, then I could go full time, but it all hinges on money and whether I can get work or not.
>out again in girl clothes w someone i know
>in a line to check out from a store @ mall
>no one had stared me or cared for that point
>sum guy walks past with his friends
>stares at me for forever lasting time while walking by
>even when he is past his head is slightly turned so he could see me
realize at home that i either got clocked rly hard or it was one of the jocks from school recognizing my man face
pls. it's hard to feel these feels this early.
add me there pls.
Sucks to be old. I'm getting SRS in about three months, my ID change right after that, plus lasik and FFS as soon as I manage to sell my stupidly large house and move to Paris, London or NYC. Yet I can't see any future for myself. All my plans are for pasts that never were meant to be... I'm nothing but human flotsam...
tonight's the night I kill myself
wish me luck, girls
I know of someone who worked a bunch of low-paying jobs and saved up for a surgery.
But you'd probably make some excuse up that you can't.
Anyway, I'll be off to bed. Night /mtfg/
Don't do it anon!
There are two more installments in the new Star Wars trilogy. You have to see how bad they turn out.
The first one was horrible btw.
nobody would actually sit through the full list i made so just take this, i guess.
Either that or it's black because it's winter.
I think it changes depending on season a bit but still looks brighter on old pics.
if i knew how to improve my self esteem i probably wouldn't be wallowing away on 4chan to be able to give you advice, unfortunately.
what are we meant to do with that picture? are you trying to solicit opinions on how well you pass or what?
honestly, it's such a release, it's like you listen to it and it's like a hug, and that no matter how shitty things are it's all okay at the end of the day and you can just let go of all the bad stuff.
How to deal w/ horrible sexual desires when really long dry spell?
again, thanks for voicing yourself. i don't know what i'd do in life without your valuable input. you're a great asset to the community, keep up the high quality posting.
I use plenty of heat protector yeah. I got the gears from my stylist last time for using expired heat protector, so I got some good stuff.
>And what are you being sad about? Besides the general tranny feels.
Just that I guess right now, but still
nobody wants to fk me
>mfw yesterday the people wanted to toss things at me once i got outside of the school
like why? im 6'1'', with my guy clothes on i look p normal boy like everyone else. except for the autistic eyes
You are my waifu.
I'll come bully the bullies.
I do air dry most of the time, I'm fairly certain it's the flat iron that's doing the damage. Also, I should add that my hair looks like poop if I air dry it without doing anything else to it ;~;
us incels still have to deal with the lewd disease.
new suicide squad trailer is awesome desu
you have straight hair idk how that works. but with curly hair at least, i shower, put in product, then air dry unless i absolutely need to blow dry.
You should probably bump the temperature down, maybe even below 300 if possible at first. If your hair is fine and already damaged then 315 is probably too hot.
Deep Conditioning is getting a conditioner nice and warm and leaving it in your hair for 20-30 minutes before rinsing it put. Try getting some coconut oil and doing that with it once a week.
if you have blue eyes and brown hair then
hey hello me
your qt butt wudnt bully anyone
these so much, god i wish i got suddenly sane and detrans.
life wud be so much easier and less distressing
>tfw never anyones waifu, just a freaky toy
finally made it to grocery store too today
>bought things a kid would buy
so many calories >:3
>tfw no waifu to eat fatty stuff with and play vidya
At 6'1'' we are past the cute territory unfortunately.