Same. Been celibate for over a year. 23 now. Got a grindr account under a week ago. Met some 17 yr old cutie. Only one Ive talked to who wants a LTR and likes King of the Hill. Hes coy af and idk if its right or practical to be pursuing someone who's 7 yrs younger. But we text a lot and last night he wanted me to come pick him up to cuddle and watch KOTH at my place. I was too tired/stoned to drive/ interact. Fml ive been trying to get with him for days now while were both hooking up w other guys and im over here questioning whether my motives are legit or jf im just a pederast creep.
>>5562575 Last year I managed to get involved with a mutual friend in our group.
I didn't know what it was like to have a relationship, much less a gay one since I never came out.
While this may sound a bit like rose colored glasses it is not. Every day with him was perfect. From working out together, going camping, hanging out with friends, cuddling, etc. And the sex, that was amazing. That feeling of trust to let the person I cared about do lewd things to me was amazing. But mostly it was having someone to talk to, someone to hold my hand, someone to spend time with.
Don't get me wrong. I had my faults. Sometimes I ended up letting anxiety and fear of coming out dictate my actions. It preyed upon our insecurities.
But nevertheless I lost him. I let this man that I grew to love walk right out on me due to it. To him I wasn't giving 100% and he was right when I look back at it. I had no reason to hide this man that I love but I was so stupid.
So now I sit here and I think about everything. I let the foundation, my anchor in life go. The person I trust completely is gone. The person I see a world and future in is with someone else.
Most of the mid 20s guys I see on grindr arent theatre/dance queens. Youre selling yourself short if you do have at least some sense of drive and meaning. It doesnt have to be the typical gay interests.
Besides, when I was 18 had a LTR with the biggest possible queen you could imagine. Art student clubkid from ny and im over here, not in school, training to be a builder, super introverted, but i was open to his lifestyle. He even took me to my first dance club when I had never danced in front of anyone and we had a great time. Common interests do not equal compatibility anon. In my case it was the opposites that made us click, and the openness to each others lives. Cliche i know.
>>5563287 Im not sure where they all hang out really, I guess im too socially retarded to have enough friends that id ever meet a gay one Either way its not happening, I wouldnt have the faintest idea how to start even if I had drive
>>5563299 Youre on grindr. Thats a start. I hear tinder is ripe too. Youre going to havve failures and rejection. Just accept it. Everyone does in virtually any human effort. Never know til you try. Dorsnt seem like youve done much trying.
I only realized I was gay at 25, now almost five years later I still haven't done any gay stuff. There was a lot of stuff that I was really unfamiliar with and had to learn and the more I learned the more it seemed like it just wasn't going to happen for me. So all in all I'd say yes it does require you to really put out earlier and be shaped by gayness before its just too late for it.
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