There's really an age that you should give up and kill yourself if you didn't transitioned yet or don't even know if you're trans for sure?
I've got so envy of a few mtf's where i live. They started hrt at, like, 12 and now are fucking happy with their life at 15's, they're also beautiful.
I've just completed 18 three days ago. Everytime i look to my extremely hairy body, my beard, my giant hands and my skinnyfat belly, i remember that i gave up long ago.
There isn't even a gender therapist here. I don't know where these mtf's got an therapist. And asking them would be disturbing for them. (Also, we never have contact, so...)
Should i keep following my few worthless life objectives, until i die from alcohol and get remembered as a joke?
trve-trans will be able to pass no matter when in their lives they decide to transition
transtrenders and agp hons will be hirsute silverback chads if they don't castrate themselves before puberty
Nope, 2015 was my last year of school but no, they we're not from my school. They we're from the same school as a few "friends" who made jokes of them.
I've seen two of them one night, when i was going to get drunk and hope to die, with these friends. But didn't gone to talk to them of course.
I need to, but self medicating where i live is so hard... I'm from argentina, low money and big costs. Also so much research to do on what meds can be taken in the hrt here. There's no gender therapists here. And i can't order online.
Any way to have even a expectation of how my genetics are? I have extremely body hair, wich i don't know how to deal with.
However, my legs are fat, and some months of gym made them so fucking thick. That's nice because it's my mother genetics.
Look you're pretty androgynous, don't sweat things too much and work yourself up. I've seen worse starts. Your hair will not only thin out from hrt it can be permanently removed through laser. Veet is nice for taking care of things in the meantime. I ran a google search for "gender therapists in Argentina", nothing specific but it doesn't seem like it's terribly barren. You don't need somebody who is specifically a gender specialist, just look for somebody who is sympathetic and can get you a prescription. What's preventing you from ordering hormones online?
That's not me in the photo, but i wished i started in his state... Maybe i post my body later
Well there's a few reasons i don't order online.
>No credit card yet, but i know i can get one easy
>I don't stay home all day and my parents will probably get the package. They order lots of local medications through the mail, so they would end up opening my box. Im not out for them of course and doubt i will.
But i can get a therapist, they are not gender specialist, but i can get one to get the prescriptions.
To be honest, while lying to myself, i've gone to two therapists in the last years, but only for 2 months each. I was bullied through school, and never counter-attacked. I know why. It's because i really felt bad about how i look. I don't want to be like this, in the end.
Do you guys have any prepaid cards there? Those things are great for stuff. You save up some money and buy them, no trail. Do you have any friends who could hold onto it for you? What about your post office, do they have some way of holding packages there?
5'9 is fine, that's tall-girl tier not hon tier.
There are prepaid cards, it's an option. I have no friends who could do this, and local post office only hold packages if they fail to deliver it the first time (No one is at home). Then, i have 7 days to take the package.
That's why i'd rather buy locally. I need to find an psychiatrist asap.
That's so better to know. If growing until 21's is true, will HRT prevent me from growing more?
i live in Buenos Aires and i found a hospital where transitioning it's totally free, the only thing they'd do is just run ask a couple questions, run some blood tests and give you a psychologist in case you needed one, bad thing is that it could take a couple months
it's free and relatively easy on this specific hospital (Hospital Duran), obviously that's if you live in Buenos Aires, where are you from?
also that reminds me that if i wasn't fat as fuck, depressed and lazy i would already be on hormones.
Yup, it wrecks male development nicely. That's half the point.
My friend how much do you weigh? And please tell me you're working on it. I had to lose a tremendous amount of weight for things to work, but I was comfortable self medding when I was at 280. It doesn't inhibit weight loss as much as you might think, still managed to swiftly drop another 50lbs and the weight that remains has been showing no signs of special resistance. Just save the social transition for after you've slimmed down, that's what I'm doing.
>Problemas con las relaciones sociales
>Me di por vencido hace un largo tiempo
Eso por nombrar algunos de mis problemas, tengo 19 años, no trabajo por que "ayy lmao social anxiety" aunque se que eventualmente lo tendré que hacer.
Si tuviese las agallas para suicidarme lo hubiese hecho hace un largo tiempo, pero no las tengo lamentablemente.
I'm on 135kg, which is around 297 pounds iirc, the doctor i went said that i had to at least lose 45kg (i was weighting 145kg the first time i went to this terapist/doctor), the first 3 months i managed to lose 10kg thanks to some house excercises and eating relatively well
fast forward 3 months, we had to move, now i live in a small apartment with my dad, mom and little sister, i stopped doing those excercises, i stopped eating relatively well, i don't go to a gym because i don't have money and also "ayy lmao social anxiety" shit, literally can't stand the stares of people, if i pass by a group of people laughing i inmediately think they are laughing at me or some shit.
I gave up a long time ago, Depression, Lazyness, Obesity, Social problems and etc. don't help at all either
Get back to eating well. Never ever allow mistakes to stop successes. You keep doing what you were doing and move on, never stop. Seriously, you can lose weight, a *lot* of weight through altering your diet. Bodyweight home exercises also exist. Kickbacks, lunges, squats, hip abductions and glute raises will all help you lose weight and tone your lower body. Frankly I was in the same position you were in, maybe a bit worse in some respects. I was going to off myself but this is easier and more enjoyable. Lost 100lbs while self medding and now it's pretty obvious I'm going to pass. Started at 19, you're younger than that. I believe in you anon just don't allow yourself to make excuses.
Sorry if I'm being annoying, but you have a chance, anon. For yourself, try. I'd be lying if I say "I know how you feel," because everyone feels the pain in a different way. But i identify with so much that you said. I left all my friends and decided to go after what I want, to get close as a girl as i can. But there's so much time that i though of that. Now, i'll go after it. I'm lazy. I gave up... but i need to do. I need to do it.
I've ended a relationship because i've gave up on life. But, at least once more. I want to try. To be happy again. My last shot.
I wish I could hug you and give you strength to try too, anon. Remember me, let's, even if spiritually, try this together. Maybe one day we remember each other and sigh as we watch the sun. "It was worth it. I hope anon is happy".
But when you start, don't give up anon, because you can't. It's your life on this track. Run, embrace it.
I double what >>5550321 said. To be honest, we're full of confusion, of fear. But i think everyone can do it. Anyone who reads this.
For the first time i've realized... We need to have our life before we throw it away. It's not right to leave right now. We're not even alive.
well, this actually made me feel something in my heart
felt kinda weird
I'm sorry if that ended up hurting you... But please consider my words. Please.
By the way, that's the body i'm trapped with. Anyone thinks it's just too male to even have a chance?
Please be honest. 1,73cm, 75kg wich is something like 165lbs. Id rather not start than start without even having a chance.
I have a posture problem wich give me constant sciatic nerve pain sometimes, that's why i look so fucking strange in the pic.
It's male but you're just skinnyfat, that's workable stuff. Hrt, exercise and patience will serve you well. Your height is also nice. My recommendation is to lose some weight, maybe about 30-40lbs over the course of 3-6 months. Be on hrt during that. Then gain 20lbs, it'll distribute in a feminine pattern and give you a boost. If you adjust to be being an andro looking girl you'll be happier. Passing is definitely possible though.
Thank you so much... I'll plan everything then.
I need to take care of all my body hair. My beard is the fucking worse. I let it grow because i couldn't fight anymore with it, not before i get the money for laser. I hope HRT helps me a bit with that.
>tfw too high of a metabolism to gain weight without overspending on food
>forever skinny man thighs
I'm 19 5'5" and 180 pounds but I plan transitioning, but i need to drop weight first, pic related is my goal.
No need, just genuinely enjoy passing on fitness advice. I believe in you.
Read the /fit/ sticky, there's not a person on the planet who can't bulk.
Pretty sure that IS a mtf, no surgery either if it's who I think it is. Just good genetics, hrt and exercise if I remember correctly. Likely difficult to replicate but not impossible if you have a similar frame.
18 is not too late. Im 25 and i feel like its too late to start but i would do anything to have started when i was 18, to be a girl by now and live the rest of my life happy with my body. If that is what you want its not too late you have alot of time ahead of you. As for your body, its something you have to constantly work on. Dont wait for the hrt to do everything, start cutting some of that skinnyfat of and you will be fine.
>my skinnyfat belly
Yeah worst of all I am on hormones and they did not change this. I really hate myself for not starting hormoens earlier because I am 24 now and hormones literally did nothing to me.
>is there a too late?
If you're a quitter then yeah probably.
>can you say fuck it and realize your dreams?
Yeah sure if you're amazing.
People can find new dreams if they aren't super amazing though. When I was like 8 my dream was to be an astronaut. It's too late for that, but I achieve other things - and who knows, maybe one day it will be easier for me to go into space. It's probably the same way with trans stuff.
>inb4 its not the same
Fuck you my lack of space exploration cripples my soul.
Me too, senpai. I think I'll stab myself through the heart and then shoot myself in the head with one of these ( http://www.gunbroker.com/Auction/ViewItem.aspx?Item=537297504#PIC ). Destroying my heart is so that even if I fail with the gun and I'm found, no one will be able to prevent my bleeding or keep my blood flowing. It's either that or a motorcycle accident. I'm not sure if I should buy a shitty helmet or a good helmet, though.
Obviously, I'd prefer to not be in the accident at all if I'll survive it with brain impediments, but if dying is the outcome, I would want to be in the accident. So the question is, would a good helmet be better because it would make sure I would die only from the most severe crash which I would have died in anyway, or would wearing the shitty helmet allow me to die from the most possible accidents (or would it instead give me a higher chance of non-fatal brain damage in very light accidents?)
Given that a moderate accident could very reasonably paralyse you. I'll take the shifty helmet.
Ending up with moderate to severe brain damage isn't that bad if you become so fucked up that you won't ever realise that you've practically became a retard. It's even better if you become brain dead because that's essentially total death as you're incapable of having a conscious mind at that point.
>moderate to severe brain damage isn't that bad if you become so fucked up that you won't ever realise that you've practically became a retard
I don't think it works that way. Regardless, I would rather not take the chance to find out.
>organ donor for all organs
I'm not sure about that, senpai... My main concern is that my organs would go to transphobes/homophobes/assholes in general that are part of the reason I ended up in a position where I want to kill myself in the first place. If I could designate who could not receive my organs and there were a realistic way that desire could be carried out, then I would sign up (though my motorcycle permit already lists me as a donor while my car permit says I'm not). I'll probably take that off when I get my license. Speaking of, both of my road tests are next month, but I have barely any practice with either vehicle.
>Pretty sure that IS a mtf, no surgery either if it's who I think it is. Just good genetics, hrt and exercise if I remember correctly. Likely difficult to replicate but not impossible if you have a similar frame.
It's impossible to replicate, because you have no control of your fat distribution. Likely, if you're like over 18 or whatever, you're probably not gonna get amazing fat redistribution, because you have so few stemcells left.
If you want to look like that, you'll need fat grafting, probably several times, with a really good surgeon. It's not gonna happen without it.
>if you're like over 18 or whatever, you're probably not gonna get amazing fat redistribution, because you have so few stemcells left.
You need stem cells to get fat colonies in new places!? Source?
Sounds like honscience to me. Fat redistribution can happen at any age. You have adipose cells all over your body and your body replaces 99% of its cells ever year. Even cis women experience some fat redistribution when they go on birth control.
Also, genetics are always a factor. If women in your family tend to have big butts, you will too. If they store more fat in their bellies, that'll likely be the case for you. Black and brown people usually get bigger butts than white and asian people
There'll be assholes your organs would save when you don't want them to, and there'll also be people who "deserves" them who could also have gotten them. How many people do you think deserve to die from organ failure, relative to those who don't deserve to?
I wouldn't know that ratio. My best guess, if we're going off transphobia alone, at least 60:40 of people who don't deserve -my- organs (whether they're entitled to organs in general is something you can ask on your own) to people I wouldn't mind donating to, maybe 80:20. Besides, depending on the organ transplanted, don't like 98% of organ receivers die within 5 or 10 years?
There isn't a too late. People can transition at many ages and pass. And/or be happier with themselves. Sure, it may have been easier if I started earlier but it's a minority who start that early. One of my inspirations was a youtuber who started transitioning at I think 25. She was 6'2" but made it work (nothing wrong with tall girls). She was pretty hot desu and even was chubby/ with lots of muscle before transition. I started at 19 and now I'm 21 and pass. I don't have idyllic features or proportions but who does? I'm WAY happier now that I came out and I am okay with how I am.
Don't give up hope.
nigga, what the fuck u talking 'bout?! your much prettier then me! im 22 years old and are just transitioning and im somewhat happy. i garantee that some straight guy probably thinks your pretty. those are both pictures of you right?? honestly, don't know how can can call yourself ugly. that pink hair looks great on you, and your bone structure is incredible. i wish i looked like that.
Okay so as someone who has experience with guns and seen some shit..
Make sure if you use a 12ga, it is buckshot or a slug. 00 Buck for home defense is best.
Any handgun should be 9mm or larger. Use HP defensive ammunition only not FMJ.
Any rifle should be .223 or larger. Same as others - Always use defensive ammunition and preferable hollowpoints and not target or plinking shit.
You will naturally flinch when holding the gun to your head and pulling the trigger, especially if youve never shot before.
Make sure you dont flinch. Look up "shotgun suicide flincher" or "flinchers" for more information on why you keep a steady hand and always aim at the side of the head, brainstem, or temple. A shot to the heart is equally effective and you are less likely to fuck up imo..
The body is an amazing thing, people survive headshots all the fucking time.
Make sure you are alone for atleast a few hours and that no one around will hear the shot and call 911.
Also know that whoever finds you has to clean up the mess and if its not a paramedic/EMT who gets to you first, that person will be scarred for life.
I started hrt at 17, but I knew I was going to have to deal with being tall and blocky since I was 13. Some people can transition later and still get lucky. Only you know if starting a few years earlier would have really made that big of a difference. I feel like I would have had to start at like 10 to get different results since I was a tall kid since then.
That's clearly not OP.
>Buck for home defense is best.
What's the reason for recommending defensive ammunition for other firearms but not for a shotgun?
>Any handgun should be 9mm or larger. Use HP defensive ammunition only not FMJ.
I thought 9mm would be too small.
>Make sure you dont flinch. Look up "shotgun suicide flincher" or "flinchers" for more information on why you keep a steady hand and always aim at the side of the head, brainstem, or temple. A shot to the heart is equally effective and you are less likely to fuck up imo..
I was already planning on building something to keep the barrel in place. I have some woodworking experience because my father is a carpenter.
>Also know that whoever finds you has to clean up the mess and if its not a paramedic/EMT who gets to you first, that person will be scarred for life.
I'm not really worried about that unless it's my brothers.
How tall were you at 13?
I mean just stick to tried-and-true defensive ammo, which for a shotty in 12ga would be 00-Buckshot.
9x19mm or greater imo. 9x19mm/.40S&W/.45ACP/.38Special/.357SIG/.357mag etc...
HP's and just quality defensive pistol ammunition is lethal and I have no doubt in my mind one 9x19mm to the skull would kill you quick.
I would recommend against using a revolver if you have no experience shooting them because the trigger pull will cause unwanted movement and require a more steady hand than just a run of the mill semi-auto pistol.
Please can you link me to her, if you still have her channel?
Tread pic is not me desu. She's an youtuber.
>However, she started mones at 19 and she's 23 now i think. Well, some people have better body features :\
But how you are today? Tall girls are not a problem i think
Thanks. I think i've had to expect that. Maybe this person is in denial like me?
And thanks for everybody i didn't quoted because i forgot. I need to see a therapist asap to see if this can help me.
>I would recommend against using a revolver if you have no experience shooting them because the trigger pull will cause unwanted movement and require a more steady hand than just a run of the mill semi-auto pistol.
That's interesting to know. Thanks for that.
I was about 5'10" at 13. I hit 6' at around 16 and I didn't grow after that.
I'm fine. My fat distribution is shit, but at least my face and voice are fine, I never got much facial hair, and my head hair is fairly thick with a perfectly good hair line. My shoulders aren't particularly broad but neither are my hips.