Need some advice everyone. My wife is bisexual and prefers women over men, she still likes men, she doesn't want to risk harming our marriage but she needs that connection with women. We've tried mff 3somes but it's just not the same for her. I'm being as open and supportive of her sexuality as I can be, we're just not sure where to go from here.
Any advice would be fantastic.
I'm a straight guy in a situation pretty close to yours: married to a bisexual woman. We've been together over 10 years now. The big difference is that she's really only come to terms with her bisexuality over the past few years. She's only ever been with men in the past because she grew up in rural Bumfuckistan with an abusive parent. so she repressed her lifelong attraction to women pretty hard.
We've discussed trying the MFF threesome thing so she can explore this facet of herself, but the odds of us finding another bisexual woman who's DTF with both of us is... rather slim. So that's been on the back burner for awhile now.
TL;DR I unfortunately don't have any advice to give you, but I'm real interested in how your MFF experiences went. Can you elaborate on those?
i would not easily accept my partner having sex with someone else.
discovering bisexuality is not a good reason to break the loyalty bond of marriage.
and being married is not a good reason to want your partner to be unhappy and unable to enjoy his sexuality.
i would aim to a stable and well defined compromise. what about her having sex with another woman with you in the room, either with clothes on or off?
the other woman not having to have sex with you might increase radically your chances to find such woman.
I belong to several bi/gay/married groups since I'm a bi guy. The majority of cases I have seen go like this:
1 - Wife comes out as bi to husband
2 - Husband initially thinks it's hot... wants in
3 - Wife only comfortable with being with a woman, not a threesome
4 - Wife finds female "sex partner".
5 - Wife and "sex partner" develop more of a relationship than initially discussed between wife and husband.
6 - As relationship between the women develop, the relationship between the husband and wife diminishes.
7 - Despite all assurances, the husband becomes secondary to the female partner.
At this point several things can happen. Wife can drop partner but is resentful. Divorce ensues. Wife can drop husband. Divorce ensues.
I'm not saying this is EVERY case but you have to remember most women can't separate sex and love. If a woman is going to be intimate with another women, odds are one or both will develop deep feelings for the other.
You do realize you're being cuckolded right? She's eventually just going to toss you off to the side and only use you as a beard (or whatever the lesbian version is) for presenting as straight in public situations.
Every straight guy always thinks it's really hot when their wife is bi up until the point their wife is getting regularly railed by a fat dyke with a strapon and they haven't touched vagina in months.
>And those who read the article all the way to the end (spoiler alert) will also learn, Soloway is dating a woman. She confirmed that she is out in an email to The Advocate. And she’s not dating just any woman; as befits the woman who does nothing in a small way, the executive producer and creator of Transparent revealed in The New Yorker she is in a relationship with the iconic poet Eileen Myles. “We had pretty much an instant connection,” Soloway told the magazine.
>Soloway also revealed to the magazine that she and her husband, Bruce Gilbert — Transparent’s music supervisor — are separating, amicably.
>"I was nervous about the first love scene I'd written for Alex and Piper," Morelli wrote. "I'd loved writing it, loved watching a tenderness emerge in their relationship where passion always seemed to be the ruling principle, but by that time, I was so deep in my own self-doubt that I constantly felt like a fraud. I was sure it was bleeding into my writing. How could it not? I was married to a man, but I wasn't straight."
>The writer and her ex jointly filed for divorce, and she has spent her time focusing on a different Orange Is the New Black star. The new couple hit the Emmys together, holding hands and dancing at several afterparties.
Hey, we bisexuals have feels too.
Think about it this way. Sex is Sex, but love and things you have built in together are worth far more than one Sex act. Soeven if she will have Sex once with a woman, if your relationship is solid she gonna stay. You both have to be open about your feelings and thoughts, no white lies,only truth otherwise it's not going to work
Forgot desu, but just in case have something that would make you unseparable Think Francis underwood relationship with Claire, also it's good to have some sort of trump card just in case so that you would be financially and monetarilly secure, if things ever go wrong way....
That's a good idea. Get a prenup right away if you haven't already OP.
Your relationship is going to dissolve anyway, but in the meantime pretend like your wife isn't just going to leave you for a woman, tell her you'll do the open relationship if you get a prenup, then divorce and find a nice straight girl who won't fuck your shit up.
It's clearly not going to work. His wife wants to sleep around and he doesn't. There's usually no way to reconcile that no matter how many therapists, meditation, haji's to mecca, pilgrimages to jerusalem, etc. you do. It always fails because one person will get jealous or upset. Especially when she starts replacing sex with him for sex with other women. She might also just simply leave him for a woman, or have a hidden relationship with a woman on the side.
>Any advice would be fantastic.
Relationships with biscum, both men and women, are a BIG, FAT NO.
Fuck and Discard.
If you're still an idiot with feels and you continue your current situation, there's only 2 possible outcomes.
She will either:
A) convince you to be a literal cυck and somehow manipulate you into thinking everything's alright with her cheating on you with another person
B) leave you for a woman because she will feel contained and dissatisfied with your relationship.
I really don't fucking get you people willingly being in relationships with Bi people.
By definition, they will eventually seek something sexually which you cannot physically provide them.
It's a recipe for heartbreak.
Op here. Just gotta clear this up; she still wants to suck and fuck me. She just wants to fuck a chick too. She's open to 3somes and she wants just her and the girl too. She's stressing because she doesn't want to lose me. So cuck status has not been reached.
Get an attorney and figure out what you need to do to get the most favorable divorce terms (move states with the best laws). Once you have done this, let her explore this side of her but without her knowing that you have 100k in the Cayman Islands under your brothers name.
Yeah if she wants to sleep with other people that makes you a cuckold.
You could do it as well but obviously it's going to be a million times easier for her so chances are you'll get no sex and she'll get tons out of this deal.
Plus if she is bi leaning toward women she's going to fall for a girl whether she wants to or not. Then you'll have an emotional divorce while she pretends like she didn't know it would happen, and then she'll take you for every last penny you own.
You're thinking about this like a guy... a guy who can have multiple sex encounters every week and can separate sex from love.
Women don't do that. Your wife will first go find a woman she can connect with. it will start out as coffee or dinners before they feel connected enough to have sex. That "connection" is the start of love. She will develop an emotional relationship BEFORE she has sex with the other woman and sexual activity will continue to bond them together.
AND... she will be sexually satisfied by her girlfriend and will develop less and less of an interest to have sex with you. She may still love you but you will become, despite all assurances to the contrary, secondary in the relationship.
You will object to being second and the lack of sex. It will cause friction between the two of you, which will just push your wife closer to her girlfriend.
Meanwhile, the girlfriend eventually will want her exclusively and work to undermine your marriage. She'll sympathize with your wife and continue developing the bond between them until you can't take it any more.
BTW - this happens in heterosexual affairs, too.
Find a woman she's compatible with and make your marriage a trifecta. You may not have sex with the new woman, but you'll at least be around her often, so try to make it someone you can pal around with.
>My wife is bisexual and prefers women over men
>We've tried mff 3somes but it's just not the same for her
It's just not going to work. Don't let yourself be taken advantage of and get out first.
She's not fulfilled with sex acts that involve you at all. This is toxic for the relationship, if you try and compromise and let her take a mistress you are just begging for heart ache and cuckhold down the line.
Sure she's stressing you are married and each other's emotional support framework. And she should be stressing, most bi people would be satisfied with a threesome with the same sex. The fact that having your cock involved in any way is not enough for her screams of very female leaning Bi or full blown lesbian in the closet. And she i stressed because knowing this now you can insulate yourself before she can find the girlfriend she will leave you for