/lesgen/ - Music crushes

>>5481517
She's so beautiful
too bad I can't get into her music or her personality

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I think Grimes is really qt

>>5481543
Same

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also

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This foxy lady.

>>5483259
Yes please

I crushed super hard on P!nk when I was a babby homo.

>>5482460
She's got a man's hairline

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My first celebrity crush was probably Yulia Volkova from t.A.t.U.
she looks so weird nowadays though

If you are out with your qt friend/ crush and at one time shift seats with other friends so you can sit next to her, to which she responds with "are you here because you want to cuddle?" and then proceeds to put her head on your shoulder, how high is her chance of gayness?

>>5481517
Came here to post this. For some reason, I find her a lot more attractive sporting her pixie cut, even though I'm way more attracted to feminine women and long hair. >dat perfect haircut paired with her hotness in New Americana

>>5483799
I would say high. Either way, I think you might as well make a move and even if you get turned down if she's so comfortable with cuddling there probably won't be any ramifications.

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Oddly enough, I don't have very many crushes that are in music. Most of them tend to be actresses or occasionally athletes. (I have a thing for MMA fighters apparently??) But the musicians I like, I REALLY like.

I'd let this lady do horrible things to me.

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Other than Twigs and 70s Stevie Nicks, I kinda have a huge crush on Mitski. She's not like, insanely hot, but I like that about her. She looks very approachable like she could by my gf IRL, and like she'd probably be real chill to hang out with. But it's mostly her vocals that got me falling in love.

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>>5483640
So

I posted this previously about her:
>As we delve further into the topic, it emerges that gender has long been a preoccupation for her. "When I was a child, I really wanted to be a boy. Not just in an 'Oh, I wish I could wear shorts and play with cars' way, because I did that anyway, but in a deep-seated way where I felt wrong in myself. I remember talking to my parents when I was five or six and saying I should be a boy."

>That she's always been drawn towards the masculine finds a fruitful, vital outlet in her stage persona. "For me, transcending gender is the ultimate goal," she says. "For men and women, the gender roles we're assigned are incredibly limiting. Being a woman, expressing masculinity is an interesting thing to do. When on stage, I feel powerful. I feel like a woman and a man."
http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/features/anna-calvi-interview-the-singer-songwriter-on-loneliness-resisting-the-patriarchy-and-starring-at-10453912.html
Kinda confirms suspicions I had. She hasn't identified as transgender, but damn, if that isn't a near admission.

Sara Barelles. Probably spelled wrong.

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>>5484568
Oooh yes.

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Hayley Williams

>>5484796
10/10 taste

>>5483799
Some straight girls I know do that kind of shit, so it's difficult to say unless you know her well.

I wish I could give you advice on knowing if a girl is a lesbian, but I can't do it at all.

>>5484927
I really got to feel sorry for you lesbians. Guys don't do that. Any skin-to-skin contact beyond a handshake or fistbump is means we gay as hell.

>>5484880
Don't you just want to suck on her lips?

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kitty

>>5483723
She signed with ello. She's far from gay. But I like her better now.

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>>5482055

>>5481517
>bisexuals
Also, that song is terrible. The fucking lorde wannabe.

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>mfw I am supposed to go to an event tomorrow night and socialize with qts for the first time in years and I've got fucking food poisoning

>>5485316
And Lorde still has just the one good song. Jesus christ, what a disappointing album that was.

Annie Clark is the only acceptable answer.

>>5482055
God damn kill it with fire

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This lady was part of the reason my friend figured out I was gay

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I want to do dirty dirty things to her.

>>5485880
>>5485840
Literally who? When you're posting nobodies, try to leave a name somewhere. Christ.

mine is MattyB

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As a young teen I always had a thing for pink. Didn't realise until later on though. Stupid denial.
In any case, I don't like her much anymore, probably has something to do with the whole married with kids thing.

>>5486007
You know you can use this mysterious thing called reverse image search if you want to know that badly you lazy shit.

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>>5483799
>>5484927 This desu

My best friend gets really affectionate, melts my heart everytime. Tried to tell her that we should go out because we're pretty much already going out. Got rejected but still really close. Now she has a caveat on my feelings.

Take a risk and ask, or run for the hills and don't look back.

Also, 19 yo Alizée is my music crush.

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I don't really dig her music but goddamn Melanie Martinez is such a qtie
I really love that teeth gap of hers, I hope she never fixes it

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Ex AKB-48 member Oshima Yuko.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGM0vID6UWo Bless her

>>5485761
400 lux and team are my shit

>>5483259
>>5485764
>you will never look this fly or get such a high profile gf

>>5486631
>you will never get a gf

>>5481401
Never had a "music crush"

My ex is a musical actress today, but I don't count her. She's never released any stand-alone tracks.

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>>5485761
>>5486631
Aw man, I really loved Pure Heroine. I have a thing for minimalistic pop music.
Fave tracks are Ribs, 400 Lux, Team and A World Alone. desu Royals is the only track I usually skip, don't really know if it's because it's a bad song or because it has been overplayed to death.

>watching cringe compilations
>feel overwhelming relief that I haven't sunk this low
>yet

>>5485756
I had big New years plans, and ended up having the flu. Sucked.

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>>5486888
Royals is a good teen song, not so for us older people.

I had crushes on both these gals, Dale Bozzio, and Cyndi Lauper.

>>5488107
Stop living in the past, grandma. [spoiler]would you be willing to kiss a 20 yo [/spoiler]

>>5486888
> Randy Marsh

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>>5486888
>>5488872
I'm Lorde ya ya ya

>>5488524
Hell yes. If I had feelings for her and she had feelings for me, I'd go much further than just a kiss. For just a kiss feelings wouldn't be needed.

>>5489174
How old are you granny. Where you at. And by feelings I'm sure you mean naked.

>>5481689
i'm not into milfs but holy shit young bjork was so cute

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1A78yTvIY1k

>>5489250
Old enough that I am a granny. By feeling I mean proper emotional feeling of really liking or loving the gal. I can't just jump into bed with somebody any more. I got burned by that to often when young. I'd rather spend the time to get to know somebody.

>>5489286
I know. Listen to some of her early songs from when she was in The Sugarcubes.

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>>5486228
YES !!!!
She's the perfect woman. Oh God

>>5489332
I can make you feel young again.

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Lucy Rose, the cutest

> tfw no qt to come up behind you and hold you close while you make dinner or put away the dishes

>>5489949
LONDON
O
N
D
O
N

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>>5489949
>tfw no qt gf to try your ramen spinach soup for breakfast
today's >tfwnogf over with

>>5490786
Again
LONDON
O
N
D
O
N

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i know she's barely a thing but regardless of music chloe howl is really qt

definitely FKA twigs too.

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Currently I've had a thing for Taylor Swift and a few other pop celebrities. But there's a few one that have stuck even if the years keep going by:

>Amy Lee, goth, pale, them eyes
>Shakira, smart, chill, them moves
>Avril Lavigne, qt that reminds me of my teen years

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Obliged to post Otep Shamaya.
Shame there aren't more badass lesbians like her in music.

>>5490751
Sadly, no. I'm on the opposite side of the world from everyone, Australia.

And goddamn, I am not spam!

>>5491050
>Australia

How are you even alive?

>>5491060
Because of all the deadly animals? <insert Steve Irwin tough Australian joke here> nah it's pretty easy to avoid dying.

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>>5491330

>>5486083
Or you could contribute to the conversation completely, you lazy fucking autist spazhole. Foisting the bare minimum off onto someone else is not just selfish, it's retarded.

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>>5490920
>Taylor Swift

Why??

>>5491330
>giant roided out rabbits will backups hidden in a pouch
>snakes hiding in everything
>giant spiders
>abbos
>spider rain
>poisonous birds
>poisonous everything surrounding the island
>poisonous beavers with beaks
Why did they call it Australia and not Monster Island?

>>5491744
>>giant roided out rabbits will backups hidden in a pouch
Roos are cute af, it's just the red ones you avoid, and they're only in bumfuck nowhere.

>>snakes hiding in everything
snakes are fairly rare unless you live further out of the city, in which case you get a snake catcher out for the few times one comes close/into your house. I've only seen 2 in the past 3 years, and it was a fairly harmless snake in terms of venom.

>>giant spiders
you got me there, but the common ones don't do shit anyway, they're just handy to eat mosquitoes

>>abbos
Yeah ok, fair point.

>>spider rain
Only in Goulburn, and only old people live there so it's all good.

>>poisonous birds
I honestly can't think of what you're talking about with that one.

>>poisonous everything surrounding the island
Jellyfish yeah, those fuckers are nasty, but it's not too often people come into contact with the box jellies.

>>poisonous beavers with beaks
Only the male's back feet are poisonous, and they're super rare to come into contact with. Only people who research them ever actually see them in the wild.

>Why did they call it Australia and not Monster Island?
No idea. Monster island sounds cooler, I'd be down for a name change.

Basically all you need to not die is some common sense. Don't go walking around in tall grass and don't fuck with stuff that can kill you.

>>5491770
>Don't go walking around in tall grass and don't fuck with stuff that can kill you.
So before I go to Australia I should make sure to have a pokemon with me?

>>5491797
Yeah basically. Wait till pokémon go comes out and you'll be set.

>>5481401
Can I get a qt gf by attending a pride march? It'll be the first time our town has held one. On topic, kate bush.

>>5492093

Well if nothing else its probably gonna be a good place to meet people.

>>5492093
I agree with >>5492104.
It's definitely a great place to meet people, and I'm sure several are also there in hopes of acquiring gf. People are usually open to flirt as well. I've been attending my city's pride events for a couple of times now, and they have always been nice, and I'm still in contact with the people I met there.

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Petra Marklund

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Shakira who?? This music video is all about Rihanna
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3mP3mJDL2k
Bless her

>>5491725
Nice memes /b/!

>>5492093
Hmm. Do single women usually go to pride marches? I thought that was more typical of a lesbian couple that one or more is really into """activism"""

>>5491770
Poisonous beaver? Nightmare.

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If I could date only one musician...

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_XIWAaFWn8

>>5493223
This video.... hnnnng

jw, why are all of these women old and manly looking? do lesbians actually like that?

>>5493566
???
which women mentioned in this thread are old aside from Björk and Cyndi Lauper? try again

Ok so I'm totally new to this online dating shit and I need a little advice. I just got the app "HER" and I was wondering if it is common etiquette to reply to everyone who chats you even if you're not attracted to them?
Like is it normal to reply with interest only as a friend or should I just not respond at all?

>>5493349
Platypus. They're pretty cute

>>5493661
Doesn't Her verify your Facebook or something like that? I mean, it's good for maintaining the user experience quality, but it sounds like a pain to sign up from what I've heard.

>>5493697
From what I read you could use the facebook verification or by phone. Like they literally call you up to verify you're a girl.

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>>5493566
Chelsea Wolfe is only 32... it's a little older than me but not so much that it'd bother me!

A lot of the girls in here aren't that old

>>5493697
>>5493724
Signing up took less than 5 minutes. It's wasn't any different from using your Facebook to set up an instagram or something like that.

>>5491770
>fellow ausfag can confirm this is 100% accurate.

Since Steve Urwin was killed I'm super paranoid about stingrays too.

Also, please be in Melbourne

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>>5481401
she is pretty qt

>>5494088
Ditto on the ray thing, they've always freaked me out though. I touched one with my foot when I was a kid and it scared the crap outta me hahaha
Sadly, no. Brisbane here.

>>5493753
>only 32

that's about 7 years after her expiration date

>>5494384
You're either a child or a pedo.

>>5494384
>18-25 is a child

>>5493724
>Like they literally call you up to verify you're a girl.

Kek. So girls and passing trannies only?
Doesnt sound too bad.

>>5494613
Sure sounds better than OKC what with all the stories of dudes with "female" on their profile that I hear. I might try it out.

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>>5493566
Sorry we aren't looking to rape children, straight man.

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>tfw no gf
But hey, I found my textbook at the library so there's that.

>>5494815
I'm glad you found your book, anon.

>>5493333
I can't speak on other cities, but NYC pride is like a party. If you're not put off by crowds, loud noise, and flamboyancy, it's incredibly fun. I don't know anyone who has gone for political or activist reasons. There are activists and organizations in the parade itself, but attendees go because it's fun. Some people bring backpacks to carry all the free merch they get, no politics involved there.

>>5494327
Oh damn, you've got the weather to worry about up there too. We have four seasons in one day, you guys have bushfires, followed by floods and cyclones.

Nice beaches though. What's the gay scene like up there?

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Lesgen, how have you personally dealt with guys falling in love with you?

So I used to think that the reason I didn't like any guys was because I was waiting for The One, and all the guys who have fallen for me in the past knew that I was one of those girls that just didn't date or hook up. Now that I understand my orientation, is my old explanation of "sorry, I'm not feeling it, I just can't" still fine? I feel like people should be adults about not having their feelings reciprocated regardless of the reason, and I never ever lead people on so my actions speak for themselves, BUT I've seen other people say that lesbians have an obligation to say the reason that they can't reciprocate is because of their orientation. Like the only way actually be honest and up front is to come out.
First of all, who says I would like these dudes if I was straight?! But also, I don't want my orientation to be a tragedy that's been inflicted onto them. I don't need their friends saying "I'm so sorry that she's a lesbian, that's terrible news, how unfortunate!" That's gross, you know?

Thanks for reading. :0

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Going to the theater with my crush on Friday!!!
I think I might finally tell her how I feel. I just hope I have the balls to do so, this subtext thing is starting to get old.

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>>5495357
Fuck off back to tumblr you retarded 15 year old.

>>5495383
Whooo, have fun!

>>5495398
Lmao what? Looking for opinions on if I can brush off dudes same as before or if not telling them I'm gay is dishonest. Sorry I'm not otherkin and won't join your wolfpack.

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>>5495383
>confessing in the theater
Lame, would not read/10. You gotta confess to her when you or she is about to die/move away/marry so you can fully enjoy the release of all those pent-up years worth of ANGST and drama and be happy lesbians together forever and ever for the rest of the eternity.

>>5495416
Go talk about dudes to bislutgen you idiotic teenager.

>>5495357
Yes, its fine. say whatever you want. you owe them nothing.

>>5495357
You don't need to tell them you are gay. It's not like you are required to specify a reason every time you reject someone, specially if they are not close to you.
Maybe if it was a friend that had a crush on you, but really who you want to be with is your business, unless you want to tell them, even if there's no reason to be broadcasting your orientation.

>>5495425
>idiotic teenager
Oof, I think you just hurt all three of my feelings!!!!!! And yeah, I'm totally going to ask bigen about being incapable of opposite sex attraction, they'll know what to do.

>>5495429
>>5495441
Thank you! Sending good vibes to both of you. :)

>>5495425
Not at the theater, after, when we go for drinks, or when we go to her place after that like we usually do when we go out. Once we are in bed cuddling and half drunk, we usually have serious conversations at that point.

I'm pretty sure it's mutual, but there's this fear that it might not be that tears me apart inside.Evidence seems to point at it, but maybe I've read too much manga and know I'm confused and my lack of social skills make it harder to figure out.

>>5495383
Are you going to see Carol? I was thinking of going to see Carol. By myself.

I have accomplished my life long dream of getting an East Asian girlfriend. I can die without any regret now.

>>5495605
No, I meant a play, not a movie. But I've been curious about "Carol".

On that note, anyone here is looking forward to "Almost adults"?

>>5495357

I tell them that they're not my type. If they press the issue I grab the taser because the next thing they usually do is attack me.

>>5495688
>tfw tasers or even pepper spray are prohibited weapons where I live

This will probably be taken by gay men leeching from the front page, or swooped up by one person who can't bear for another person to be happy, but hopefully a bare minimum amount of generosity won't be pissed all over. I know a fair number of my lezzie chums play vidya, and so many people I met over Skype and TC have found themselves chased off or too busy. But I had good times, so I'm giving back.

Protip: some of these heavily feature tits.

RFZN0-DB8ZV-PBCE6
VMRG0-LFBYA-W9BCA
YZ0RC-B6M4K-MCM6W
6ABYF-WMRB8-0IA9Q
YM79C-RT7N5-JLBTR
H0WI9-F3A2K-NJCKF
2IRMT-2GX39-QPCCJ
JRHVY-K3Q5X-6TI8Y
48T7K-DBT27-0LTZK

>>5495357
Guys are measurably retarded, so they'll keep chasing you if you don't do a complete shut down. And then it's your fault for not being clear enough, because testosterone makes a person's emotional development degrade, apparently.

>>5495806
Omg what did u guys get? i got the last 2

>>5495806
Oh my god??? I love you???
Redeemed 6ABYF, thank you so much. Would you be okay with me redeeming one more? Won't take a second if you say no, I totally understand wanting to max them out amongst people. You are amazing, thank you thank you!

>>5494384
Well, if she's seven years past her expiration date, I'm 1 year past. It's like we're perfectly matched!

>>5495806
They are all gone in less than 15 min ;_;

>>5495896
Maybe I'll do it again sometime, who can say? Sorry, anon.

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>>5493566
LOL
Here's a gal I had a crush on when young. Even got to talk with her a number of times.

>>5495940
>>5495806
Do you have an Amazon wishlist with something not too expensive on it, anon? Would love to give back to someone who went out of their way to make others happy.

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>mfw compiling in a potato and /lesgen/ has no good shitposts
Entertain me, nerds.

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>>5496001
/r/InternetIsBeautiful is a great way to find neat things to kill time with. Genuinely interesting stuff to do on there. If you check it out, lmk what caught your eye. :)

>tfw heater is slowly dying and you're masturbating just to warm up
Have I finally hit rock bottom

>>5496013
>tumblr
>reddit
>emoticons
Now this is what I call shitposting.

>>5496014
Reminds me I need to fix my heater...

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>>5496022
uwu

Would /lesgen/ date a girl they were not attracted to if she had a lot of money? Why or why not?

>>5496048
I can't speak for lesgen, but i sure wouldn't.

>>5496048
Nah. And if I had a lot of money I'm actually not sure how I'd go about dating to avoid the kind of girls who would...

>>5496048
Yes because I'm broke af. My mother always said I was pretty enough to be able to marry for money.

>>5496098
This.

>>5496048
I'm way too young to start settling now. Maybe if I'm flat broke in a few decades, but I want a relationship with someone I actually, well, want a relationship with. There's nothing she can buy me that would make a dishonest, dispassionate relationship worth it.

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Anyone else obsessed with "living doll" girls?
I mean god damn, a girl that can pull it off is the ultimate wet dream for me.
I just want my own to treat like a princess, take care of, and abuse in a tenderly loving way..

>>5496171
Booooooo.

>>5496171
Not really, but I want a qt Japanese gf that's basically flawless to protect.

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>>5496177
Don't boo my princesses.

Beckii on the right is confirmed for identifying as lgbt. I'm waiting patiently for her to get a gf so I can fantasize about them fucking.

>>5496205
Wait what, le Haroohee weebo is confirmed for autistic? What a surprise.

>>5496171
No. Exclusively into humans with free will and opinions and the like, not fantasy objects.

>>5496205
They creep me the fuck out.

>>5495806
Women truly are the superior sex. You are a fine lady mam.

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>>5496171
No, you creepy fuck.

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>>5496218
>>5496302
>>5496334
Sooooo.... you guys are telling me you wouldn't fuck them? That's a damn shame, to each their own I guess.

Related to this topic I actually met a girl like this in real life. I go to college in Japan and she was another foreign student from Russia.
She was my dream girl, perfect in every way, even down to her mannerisms. I didn't even know it was possible for an actual angel like her to exist.
Also she has/had a Japanese boyfriend but I don't give a fuck, I doubt he could please her the way I could.
Maybe it was all just in my head but I swear the way she looked at me wasn't straight.

Anyway, long story short I learned how to say "you're beautiful" in Russian and some other shit and the day I planned on saying it I found out that she had to drop out due to some money problems but would be coming back to the school in 2 years or so.
Apparently she's still here in Japan because she got work modeling. There's still hope.

tl;dr
>tfw no russian living doll gf

>>5495259
Yeah. Weather isn't so bad lately, mostly it's just really hot and humid.

I honestly can't say, I haven't had much of a chance to check it out, I moved up from nsw last year. Gonna go with a mate from work at some point soon though.
I have seen a crazy amount of gay women at shops and stuff though. They're all taken, so I haven't been able to do anything, but still.

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>>5496445
That's kind of an upsetting story and the way you think about women is kind of dysfunctional.

As a Russian girl, if another girl said "you're beautiful" to me in Russian it would almost definitely work. Well, unless that lady wanted me to have a submissive personality and look like I could shatter if the wind blew too hard.

how do you go about meeting other lesbians? for those of you in relationships how did you meet your gf?

>>5496445
Am I reading the synopsis of a yuri manga?

>>5496048
No. My attraction is based upon personality as much as, if not more than what they look like, so in that situation I wouldn't get along with them either. There'd be no point. Nobody would be happy.

>>5495605
Went to see it the other day on a date.
Cinema was like 80% full, and there were maybe 5 men in the whole room.
It was pretty great tbqh familia

Also when the film ended and all the les couples in the audience were getting up and leaving together it was a special time to be alive.
The butch girl sitting in front of me gave me the biggest grin I've ever seen on the way out.

In all, decent film would recommend.

>>5496664
At this point I'd settle for someone who kissed me like she meant it, even if she never did. Life is compromise.

>>5481517
Who is that?

>>5495475
>Sending good vibes
>on 4chan
What happened?!!1!one! I was only gone like 3 month!

>none of you fags posting uh huh her
>absolute proove that you all idiots with no taste in music and qts that make music AND fuck

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQAJa1GcglM

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>>5496048
>tfw my ex had a lot of money (or at least decent amounts) and she broke up with me yesterday.

I even loved her. She has bought me several tickets to cities in Europe and I am typing this on the laptop she gave me.

I also failed my exam so I feel so shitty

>>5497065
Poor thing. why did she break up

>>5497065
Seems like there's a lot of break-ups these last days. New Year resolutions?

>>5496738
Well then it sounds like I might spot a qt. 2016 is my year friends!

>>5497168
Noticed that, little on edge.


>>5497175
Hey it's worth a shot!

>>5496652
Are you single. Teбя кpacивыe

>>5497133
Lately I have been busy and my computer broke down a lot so I've been quite annoyed lately. She hated me being moody and mean and was afraid to talk to me. So she broke up with me after a week of not talking. Same week she got me the laptop so we could actually skype again (we were long distance).

>>5497238
What did she say exactly?

>>5497238
>and was afraid to talk to me
maybe best you let her go... doesnt sound very healthy

>>5497246
Basically that she was emotionally exhausted.
She said she still loves me though

>>5497256
She tends to overreact and get emotional fast. She broke up before, a week before flying over to me because she was just so nervous.
She has family in this country so she stayed with them, she gave in after about a week because she felt bad.

>>5497344
>She tends to overreact and get emotional fast. She broke up before, a week before flying over to me because she was just so nervous.
>She has family in this country so she stayed with them, she gave in after about a week because she felt bad.
yeah, thaks for even reenforcing what i said..

>>5497477
Was just giving you a bit more info anon

>>5497238
>buying expensive things for a person you don't personally know
She sounds beta and crazy as fuck.

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>>5497197
Oh anon, you're making me blush!

>>5496445
>Also she has/had a Japanese boyfriend but I don't give a fuck, I doubt he could please her the way I could.
>Maybe it was all just in my head but I swear the way she looked at me wasn't straight.
You think like one of those straight guys who hit on lesbians. Absolutely disgusting.

>>5497654
>implying lesbians wanting to fuck straight women = men wanting to fuck lesbians

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>>5481401
I- I don't like many female music faves. Pls no bully. That said pic related gets me going.
>>5483939
> I don't have very many crushes that are in music
>I have a thing for MMA fighters
>I'd let Angela lady do horrible things to me.
Are you me?

>>5497635
Пoжaлyйcтa, anon.

>>5497722
>I swear she's attracted to me
>Her partner can't please her, I'm a better match
>I don't give a fuck about her orientation or the fact that she's in a relationship
Straight guy alert.

>>5495425
>>5495398
>>/femgen/
>>/mtfg/
You really should get back to your proper threads, Kek.

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>>5497722
It's literally the same.

I don't hit on heterosexuals for exactly that reason. It's creepy as fuck.

>>5497511
We met up multiple times and went on trips in Europe together. I also met her parents and shit. We were long distance but it's not like we didn't know eachother.

>>5497833
It's so nice when Kek isn't shitting up the place. Like night and day.

>>5497833
>>5498314
Fuck off, trannies.

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>tfw could easily get a boyfriend today
>tfw haven't been able to get a girlfriend in over a year

haha kill me

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>>5498811
iktfb

Men hit on me way too frequently. And I'm always left confused on top of everything else. I'm fat and utterly dykey-looking. Are these guys waking up in the morning like "OO YEAH FAT LESBIANS GOTTA GET ME SOME OF THAT ACTION"?

Just, what?

>>5498878
How fat and dykey are we talking?

>>5498811
I'll be your girlfriend anon. I've loved you forever.

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>>5498940
BMI of 35. Pic related is my haircut. Wear cargo pants and men's t-shirts exclusively.

Pretty fat. Pretty dykey.

I've got a pretty (very feminine) face and I'd be hot if I were skinnier, but I don't think that really counts for a lot desu.

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>>5498811
Are you me??
I could've had like 8 boyfriends in these 18 years of living if I was willing to but no qt girl is ever interested in me

>>5498970
i've always loved you too, anon.
i'm so glad we're together. ;~;

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Reminder that straight waifus will never love you more than man cream.

>>5498994
>man cream
Jesus, anon. I just got over food poisoning, don't make me vomit again.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLjx4H2WAHg

>tfw no adorable gf to watch stuff herself

>>5499036
How is she not a hamplanet?
>inb4 japanese genetics

>>5499036
I fucking love her vids, it's weird

>>5499066
She has a condition where she can't digest food like normal people, she explains it in some of her youtube videos

>>5499071
How does she lives, then?

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>>5499066
As the other anon has stated, she has said in a faq when she eats such large volumes of food at one time they go through her digestive tract largely undigested. Whether or not this is 100% true is another story.

>>5499071
I'm obsessed with her, I have no idea when I got this fucking fetish for watching girls eat but something about it is hot as hell.

On a slightly darker note, I really hope that what she says about her digestion is true. It would be really tragic if she was actually making herself purge after.

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>>5499071
>>5499118
>you will never have a medical condition that makes it so you can eat enormous amounts of food and not be fat

>>5493665
I was trying to be lewd >:

>>5498975
>24 years old
>constant attention from guys
>got asked out by chads in high school and college
>turn them down because I want pussy
>never get attention from girls
>girls pass me by as if I don't exist

Still a kissless virgin.

>>5497749
>>5483939
Which fighters do you like, ladies?

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>>5499236
>girls pass me by as if I don't exist
I feel you. Don't worry anon, we will find our qts eventually

>>5496660
If only my life could play out like a yuri manga.
Instead the reality is just me being teased by cute straight Japanese girls that like to act questionably with each other.

I swear Japanese girls are even harder for me to understand than the ones back home.

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What's the last compliment you recieved? Online and irl both count.

>>5499373
They are not straight, they are provoking you by trying to get you to rape them but you're such a beta nerd you can't even realize that. Stay a virgin.

>>5499373
Maybe it's because they're japanese?
I really want to fuck the author of Eventually I will Become Yours - she seems so chill.

>>5499381
Indirect compliment. I said something along the lines of
>"that's the cutest thing I've heard all day!"

>>5499409
*and she responded with something along the lines of

>>5499409
>I really want to fuck the author of Eventually I will Become Yours - she seems so chill
Is the MC if her work her self-insert?

>>5499381
"I like your boobs... And your butt"

>tfw so horny you're masturbating to yuri

>>5499448
Probably not. I really like how in her interview she's the typical polite jap and says that other yuri manga are set in all girls schools and that's alright and everything but she believes yuri should be done at co-op schools, because she wants to make it clear that yuri > het

I'm happy for her, from what I hear her series is doing exceptionally well. Like, they were surprised at how quickly they sold out and demanded a reprint. I'm gonna find her and marry her someday. Either her or Amano.

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>>5499409
I really want to fuck the author of Murcielago both for being an actual lesbian and creating the miracle of the universe that is Kuroko.

>>5498971
You would have women falling all over you if you were just skinnier, too. Heck, they might now, I don't know your life.

I'm going to imagine you skinnier.
mm. chubby butches.

>>5499714
I'm sure Kuroko is the manifestation of her inner self. I couldn't trust her to be faithful, she's still trying to hook up with all the yuri writers.

>>5499236
Are you giving any indicators of faggotry? I'm just plain not attracted to women until I know they're gay or legitimately bi. It's like something in my brain shuts off even the possibility of attraction or arousal or even interest until I'm sure. There might be dozens of other people like me out there. Dozens!

>>5499381
>I feel a lot happier around you. There's just something about your presence.

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>>5499725
I'm losing weight rn partially for that reason. I was BMI 40+ this time last year.

Tbqh I could probably get dates pretty easily if I put myself out there. I'm fat af, but I'm pretty good at pretending to be more confident than I am, which translates to qts.

>mfw I have social anxiety disorder, on medication and in therapy, got it barely under control, and when people meet me they overwhelmingly describe me as "outgoing and confident"

>>5499714
I started reading that yesterday. I knew it was supposed to be hella gay, but I wasn't expecting it to be THAT gay.

>>5499757
>I'm losing weight rn partially for that reason. I was BMI 40+ this time last year.
Good on you, anon. You'll live longer and get more qts. I need to lose a tiny bit of weight myself.

>>5499763
Yeah, hitting that "morbidly obese" line was not a good moment for me.

When you get that fat you actually start having trouble getting around, and, like, breathing and shit. I ain't tryna die before I hit 30, y'know?

Completely changed my diet. I'd be pretty happy to get under 30 this year. I haven't been officially not-obese since high school.

FLORENCE WELCH

>>5499714
This, I wanna eat her pussy for days. She deserves many sex slaves and orgasms.

>retards who don't talk to other girls complaining about other girls not talking to them

God I'm sick of your shit, you deserve to die kissless virgins. And don't ever forget that it's your own fault and you'rethe only one to blame.

>inb4 "lesbians dont exist in my area!!!!"

>>5499739
>Are you giving any indicators of faggotry?
HOW DO I DO THAT?

>>5499834
Lesbians don't exist, period.

>>5499851
Legitimately, you can't. When dress roles used to be more strict you could at least count on a butch-looking woman to be gay or bi, but these days even heteros are shaving their heads or whatever. You have to be completely explicit.

>wear a rainbow pin or similar (not recommended, pure autism)
>explicitly tell people you are homosexual

Those are pretty much the ways.

>>5499851
... Flirt with girls maybe. Then they might get the hint.

>>5499866
I was going to tell you to kill yourself for that first one but at least you had the decency to not recommend it.

>>5499734
Cheating normally disgusts me but I'd happily enter into a polygamous relationship if it meant that I'd get feel Kuroko's snake tongue on my skin.

>>5499872
Tell me a pick up line a girl could win you over with.

>>5499851
I've noticed girls around here have a rainbow themed background on their phone. It's rather discrete and you can kinda use it as a bat signal.

>>5499888
I mean, it gets across that you're gay.

It also gets across that you're the kind of autistic faggot who wears a fucking rainbow pin on your lapel or whatever the fuck, so...

>>5499896
Pick up lines don't work unless you're a charming fucker who make it clear that you're only joking when using that line, which will make the girl laugh and think you're funny and charming. To sum it up, you better be hot or you'll look like a pathetic weirdo and she'll tell her friends about this so they can all make fun of you.

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>>5499896
"Hey, anon, you're cute. Would you like to go on a date sometime?"

Really, any straightforward variation on "You are attractive, let's do a date thing."

>>5499907
Also immature and tacky. Good luck finding an attractive classy adult woman with rainbow shit on her.

>>5499739
I can relate. Reciprocation is a turn on. If someone's not interested, I want to waste energy on cultivating attraction. Maybe it's a defense mechanism so that I don't get hurt, maybe it's just being a mature adult and being able to preemptively move on, maybe it's waiting for The One(s). Still get starry-eyed occasionally but never hung up.

>>5499942
Yeah, exactly.

>>5499896
Normal conversation followed by normal "you're very pretty, woukd you like to go on a date" because pickup lines makes me think that the person isn't genuinely interested in me but that I'm interchangeable with any other hundred girls. Which may be true and is fine, but I'm not saying yes to a date if I think the other person doesn't care about me at all, you know?

>>5499739
Same here. I've never fallen for a friend. I have to know they're gay. And since none of my friends are ,well I find some good girls elsewhere . I usually fall in love with the older girls though. I'm early twenties. That weird? I can't date younger.

I've been wanting to make an OKcupid profile because I need to start dating again but something's stopping me.

Convince me to do it right now, lesgen.

>>5500022
No. Older women are the best.

And I say this as someone who used to only date and be interested in younger girls, I've seen the light and it's made of mindblowing sex, maturity, and stability.

>>5500025
dont bother
all the attractive ones are biscum
and the ones who aren't are tumblrtards

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>>5500025
You'll die alone faggot. So just make one and find yourself a qt. Just don't make an autistic profile. Like this...

>>5500060
Oh god, that's horrifying.

>>5500060
Is that Lorde's profile? And what the fuck is ***ails?

I'm getting stuck on the fucking username for some reason.

Why is it so hard to come up with something not autistic?

>>5500044
>tfw to some people you are the older woman

I'm about to hit Christmas Cake status.

>>5500084
Cocktails
Cock filtered out

>>5500090
just put your name with some random numbers at the end, can't go wrong.

>>5500091
>little girls think you're a cougar even though you're in your mid-late twenties

>>5500025
Okcupid is for poor people. You need a good woman of faith. Christianmingle is where it's at.

>>5500090
Go with something like xxxS4niCxxx666

>>5500103
>not going with some obscure shit so shy cute girls who don't know what to talk about can at least ask you about it to keep the conversation going

>>5500107
Well, if you're chasing after younger girls, that's pretty much cougar behavior, isn't it?

>>5500103
Eh. The autism levels on that are fair-to-middling.

>>5500120
~*xXxg0tt@g0f@stxXx*~

>>5500126
I'm thinking a reference to a thing I'm a fan of? But you gotta be careful, that can go turbo autism pretty fast.

>>5500132
They chase after me, I don't do that anymore.

>>5500076
>>5500084
Its my favourite profile to make fun of. Its my local area pof. She has autism.

>>5500025
At best, you'll find the love of your life! At good, you'll go a nice date or two and even if you don't hit it off, you'll feel good that you were proactive and met other ladies and socialized. At medium, you'll improve your self-esteem by flirting with cute girls online. At worst, nothing really.

>>5500022
No way, younger is crap. Especially when you're in your early twenties, what's someone fresh out of high school (or god forbid, still in school) supposed to offer you? Same age is good, older is great because of the greater maturity and intellect (obviously varies but in general). Not TOO much older hopefully, anon, because then you have to wonder why no one their age will go for them- it's usually because they have the maturity and intellect of someone your age and not their own.

>>5500140
>~*xXxg0tt@g0f@stxXx*~
If their profile was not terrible and they seemed sufficiently self-aware, I would actually message someone with this username because it made me laugh out loud.

>>5500158
I'm sure my area has plenty of CIS SCUM DON'T CONTACT ME

>not seducing a girl by putting a bag over your head and screaming "It is I, the ham cutlet man."

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>>5499942
>>5499907
>>5499866
What about something like this? Small pin with two interlocking Venus symbols on it.

>>5500194
Stop. Go with a picture of explicit yuri instead, now that would catch my attention.

>>5500194
Significantly less autistic.

Still pretty autistic.

You'd want it to be reaaally small, like one charm on a charm bracelet or something.

>>5500171
This is a good point.

I mean I guess in my mind the "at worst" is loads of lesbians gathering around my profile to message me and call me a fat disgusting piece of shit who nobody could ever love, but that seems like a somewhat unrealistic scenario.

>If their profile was not terrible and they seemed sufficiently self-aware, I would actually message someone with this username because it made me laugh out loud.
My dank 4chan memes are probably gonna be really hit-or-miss tho

>>5499001
Oh you don't want to talk about MAN CREAM oozing out of MAN THINGS from MEN with their MAN lusts out for your corruption by the lewd power of MAN????

>>5493697
i got on the mailing list for android and they keep sending me articles i cant read unless i have the app :( i dont wanna unsubscribe cause i want to know when the android app is out asap, but damn this is annoying

>>5500232
Oh, there's no Android version yet? I guess I can't sign up anyway then...

>>5500224
Yeah no, this doesn't happen anon.

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>>5500242
Yeah I think that's my social anxiety disorder talking.

>>5499381
My crush said I have nice eyes and handwriting.
;_;

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>>5500212
You think a charm bracelet is better than a pin?

>>5500224
I definitely understand where you're coming from with that fear, but women really do not message each other like this. This is not going to happen, you should go for the profile! You sound like a good person, and if you sound that way on 4chan, then I'm sure you have nothing to worry about off-anon either. Plus if you're okay hanging out here where people are throwing around slurs and insults, you'll probably do just fine talking to the much more pleasant people on okcupid.

I think if something makes you laugh, it will make someone else laugh too and it gives people a starting point for messaging you. There aren'r really "underground" inside jokes on the internet any longer, if it's on 4chan, it's also on reddit, tumblr, instagram, and twitter. Buzzfeed will post "27 Dank Memes Guaranteed To Make You Laugh! Number 12 Made My Jaw Drop" in a week. Anyway, good luck! Sending you strength to combat the anxiety. Again, you seem cool and I hope you get to talk to lots of lovely single ladies.

>>5500330
Thank you! This is actually bolstering my confidence to git 'er done.

I'm just really stuck on the name part. Last time I tried this I picked a random name and then cringed every time I opened my profile >.>

>>5499409
>"that's the cutest thing I've heard all day!"
Oooh what did you say to prompt this!!

>>5499689
If this was said by someone you like, congratulations! If this was said by a creep, my condolences.

>>5499748
You sound like a special person, anon. What kind of presence does this person see in you?

>>5500318
Gonna steal the earlier anon's compliment and say "that's the cutest thing I've heard all day!" ;_; is right. What color are your eyes?

>>5500348
Of course! <3 You can always go for something a little generic but very safe, like name+location usernames like SeattleSarah or ValerieNYC or whatever. If you want a username that's more username-y, try thinking of, for lack of a better word, what "brand" you want to have. Like how you're going to sell yourself. Calm and down to earth? Bubbly? Adventurous? I think this is important to think about because regardless of how true stuff like "I like watching movies and hanging out with my friends" is, it communicates absolutely nothing about you and doesn't build an image of you as a person. So if you wanted to communicate that you're an artist, for example, you could pick a username like "papers-and-pencils" or something. Not a great example but you get the idea. Hope this is at least a little helpful!

>>5500405
>So if you wanted to communicate that you're an artist, for example, you could pick a username like "papers-and-pencils" or something.
Yes! Something like this.

I'm fucking obsessed with MCU, and I write fiction. Something along those lines, somehow.

>write fiction
>terrible at coming up with a creative username
lel

>>5500405
>What color are your eyes?
A medium/dark green.

She has the nicest, light green eyes herself though. I was enthralled by them the first time I saw them, so even before I developed feelings for her.

>>5500405

>>5499689 here
Said by my gf, so not creepy lol

>me when im not finding anyone attractive on okc
>"theres no one hot on here why do i bother"
>me finding a 10/10 on okc in my area
>"mmmm im gonna move eventually cause this town sucks so i shouldnt even bother messaging lol"

can someone smack my brain for me

>>5500426
Usernames are hard! You get an unlimited numbers of words and ways to express your ideas in fiction, but with a username on a dating website, you have only so many characters to represent all of who you are. Not being able to come up with one doesn't reflect poorly on you as a writer.

>fucking obsessed with MCU, and I write fiction
I can't think of a good username based on these two facts but in the process of trying to figure one out, I made up three very bad puns.
Literary Agents of SHIELD.
Henry David THOReau.
StarkNotes (........like Tony Stark and SparkNotes)

I'm sorry and/or enjoy.

>>5500568
They aren't hard if you don't think too much about them. I tend to avoid people whose usernames involve some fandom, some singer, or some stupid princessy edgemaster elf shit.

>>5500582
To be fair some fandom names can be funny if they are witty enough. But if they seem waaay into it they start to come off as autistic weirdos.

>>5495357
You absolutely HAVE to be a dick about it.
If you really don't want to deal with it. You have to come off as a horrible person. Or risk sexual assault

>>5501036
How does it feels to be a lesbian just because you got raped?

>>5493566
Straight men are socially conditioned to be attracted to teenage girls, who are easily controlled and manipulated.
Lesbians are less likely to be subject to that conditioning, I am most attracted to women with big hips, small waist and thick limbs because that's what a real grown-up woman looks like. Not a hairless 18 year old.

>>5500115
>Christianmingle

Nah, she needs to make a FarmersOnly account. That is were all the pussy is at.

>>5501127
No one is socially conditioned to anything.

>>5501047
I never got raped...
Loser.

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>>5500568
>literary agents of shield
>mfw
That's both terrible and amazing, I love it.

Thanks for the suggestions, anon. I gotta noodle on it.

>>5500582
tbf someone who's put off by fandom would probably not be a good match for me anyway. I'm well-known in my social circles for going on long excited rambles about Marvel at the slightest provocation.

>>5501196
>tfw no qt gf to argue about Marvel vs DC

>>5481401
Why are lesbians universally human garbage?

>>5501127
Agreed. I think that in addition to women largely because all lesbians were teenage girls themselves, many or even most of us felt first hand the effects of that ephobephilia/pedophilia and what it's like to have adult men be attracted to you. Truly knowing that a) teenage girls are real autonomous people and not fantasy objects and that b) an adult's sexual attraction is creepy at best and traumatic at worst... well, what's the appeal and what's to replicate.

>>5501036
Thank you for your advice. It's certainly something that could happen, but because the people who have really liked me have not crossed boundaries and all been my friends, I don't feel it's appropriate to be horrible to them off the bat when they haven't done anything wrong. If people are persistent about chasing me though, I certainly stand up for myself and set boundaries though.
If someone was the sort of person who could sexually assault me upon rejection and provocation, wouldn't treating them horribly aggravate that possibility?

>>5501196
Haha, glad you liked it!
Do you have an AO3 account (assuming you're a fanfic author)? Would love to check your stories out, if you're okay with sharing.

>>5501358
Most people suck, regardless of sexual orientation.
Most vocal idiots among every group are usually the worst.
Tumblr fat cunts and SJW bitches are the lowest forms of lesbianism.
Regular lesbians are just women that like other women.
You usually don't notice them because they are busy being normal.
Same as how gay dudes are just regular guys that fuck other guys, while there's a few that are flamboyant political fags in ass-less chaps.

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>>5501394
At this point I'm starting to think that if you were molested as a child/teen by non-close family adult people is because you actually were asking for it. I have never been molested, not even in public transportation, and I'm 21 living in the third world. Of course I never dress like a slut or show interest in men, plus my autist aura is a natural protector against sex.

>>5501442
Are you fat perchance?

>>5501442
And then there's this asshole.

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>>5501358
Womp womp. Self-hating or jealous that you can't be part of humanity's elite?
I hope you see an exceptionally cute dog the next time you go outside, anon, and it gets really excited when it sees you and starts wagging its tail and the dog's owner laughs as the dogs runs over to you and says "wow, he never gets like this, he must really like you!" and you crouch down to pet the dog and its soft and warm and the dog looks so content to be receiving affection from you, like there's nowhere else this puppy would rather be. I hope you feel special and experiences simple, uncomplicated joy in that moment.

>>5501404
>Tumblr fat cunts
It's kind of interesting how every site regards other users as being the worst of the worst, and thinking that they have a disproportionate number of fat users. On reddit and 4chan, its "go back to tumblr." On 4chan and tumblr, "go back to reddit." People on tumblr and reddit say "go back to 4chan" (actually most of the internet says this, but you get my point). The circle of life.

>>5501442
That's like saying that you've been driving in a car all your life in a large city and never gotten into a car accident, so people who have been in accidents were asking for it. Or you've been eating food all your life and never gotten food poisoning, so people who have were asking for that. Shit happens to some people and not to others. And I don't think you really believe this deep down. Imagine a ten year old girl the day after she's been molested by a stranger. Could you look at her and say "you were probably asking for it, because I'm 21 in a developing country and it's never happened to me"? No.

>>5500405
I'm just quiet and non-judgemental. I've always been told stuff like that, but I think it's just because so much of the society I'm in is loud and intrusive. So to be around somebody that isn't that way just calms folks down. I like that I can be comforting to others.

>>5499942
>she doesn't get sticky from imagining a woman in her late 30s in a power suit with a small rainbow lapel pin
Bitch get out of my face, you don't know what's best in life.

>>5501477
>jealous that can't be part of humanity's elite?

Actually I'm rich. I'm just curious why every lesbian has the exact same detestable personality.

>>5501486
>exact same detestable personality.
You figured it out, bro. We're all the same person. You're so smart.

>>5501490
I wouldn't be surprised honestly.

>>5500060
I'd go on a date with her. She sounds nice. Y'all are oversensitive.

>>5501457
Nope, underweight but not skelly.

>>5501477
Car accidents are certainly the fault of two or more cars, when the accident isn't solo.

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>>5501486
Amazing. Petition to make "Actually I'm rich" the new copypasta response.
You should go outside and try to find that dog now, nonnie.

>>5501490
Confirmed, there is only one lesbian.

>>5501483
You might like Jessica Jones, if you haven't watched it already. Jeri Hogarth sounds like she would be up your alley, though she's older.

>>5501508
A precisely example of the character defect seemingly present in all lesbians.

>>5501514
Preferring Marvel to DC?

>>5501525
Actually, yes.

>>5501527
What if I don't obsess over either of the big 2?

>>5501508
But Jeri is the exact kind of mature and classy woman who would never wear tacky rainbow shit. Same goes for her girlfriend/slut. Also I hate Marvel crap but Jessica Jones was pretty good and really entertaining.

>>5501532
My mind would probably implode under absurdity of a lesbian not obsessing over either.

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>>5501525
Not that bitter anon, but DC is not bad. They both have their flaws and strengths.

>>5501537
So you're basically some underage retard who has never met a lesbian outside of tumblr, just kill yourself already instead of shitposting so hard.

>>5501514
>Be a dick to people
>People react in kind
>Wow people are dicks

>>5501549
Why are you so salty?

>>5501537
Well, I'm not heavily interested in cape comics so no obsession here, I reserve that for other things.

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>>5501540
Ahh, cute! PSA to anyone unaware since she's not really a major character (no movies, shows, etc) but Batwoman/Kate Kane is a lesbian. Married, even.

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>>5501292
>DC
>ever
>mfw
I kid, I kid. I used to like Superman some.

>>5501394
I would love to share, but my big fic project isn't ready for public consumption yet. If you're browsing the Agents of SHIELD femslash tags on AO3 in the future sometime and you run across an absolutely enormous Bobbi/Skye fic, though, you'll know it's me.

>>5501590
Miss angry tropical fruit, that you?
Good luck with your big fic!

>>5499381
>Woah, your eyelashes are so big! I wish my eyelashes were like that.

The only complement I ever get from girls are those about my eyelashes.
Why are other girls so obsess with eyelashes?

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>>5501613
Hah! No, I'm not pissedoffpineapples, but I'm flattered! I love her Simmorse fic. Some of the best Bobbi femslash out there.

>>5501645
Uh it's probably the only thing they can compliment you on.

>>5501691
True.

>>5501698
I'm socially retarded so I need confirmation if a girl is into me

>have class with qt last semester
>finally start talking to her towards the end of the year
>she comes over to my house after classes whenever she has time
>i go stay at her's when we have to study or do homework
>we always cuddle during sleepovers or when we have a chance
>text everyday ever since
>one time while drunk we kinda had sex, but never really talked about it
>she gave me a kitten for xmas "so i could always remember her"
>we are trying to see if we can take some more classes together even if we have different mayors
>we go on "dates" sometimes
>we're unusually close for only being friends for 2 months

But, here's the shitty part, she was kinda messing around with someone before this started and may still be at it, not sure what the deal is since we haven't talked about it much because it fucking breaks my heart. So why does she bother with me?

>>5501995
Umm.

You need confirmation that this chick is into you? Really?

>>5502002
I think she is, but then why is she still fucking around with her coworker?

>>5502012
Ask her. Or ask her out, and find out then. Whatever you do, stop pussyfooting around.

>>5502012
Maybe she still doesn't know what she really want. Is her coworker a man?

>>5502107
Yeah, but she's been dating girls since middle school. She just happens to have daddy issues that I find creepy, but ignore due to my fondness of her.

>>5502118
>daddy issues
Huh. Girls like this tend to stay with men once they have resolved their problems with men. Ask her what she really wants, it seems like you like her so stop waiting for something that may never come. It's better to do something about it than nothing.