Okay /k/, As retarded as it sounds I got paid $500 to "catsit"

>>22240957
For 500 bucks, get an ak. Or buy a handgun.

>>22240966
Not him, but what's the best budget AK?

>>22240957
>$500 to "catsit"
was it a fucking tiger ?

>>22240984

Sisters bf is stacked.. he also really loves his cats. Im basically being paid to keep his cats company.

>Be me
>Living at his super technologically advanced house for several days
>Crib stocked with food and everything good
>Paid $500
>used a bidet for the first time

>>22240966
I have a handgun, but no rifle worthy of operator status. I was thinking AK would be the way to go though

>>22240983
You won't find much right at or under 500 right now because "le bamba banned da aks!!!" So. Honestly I see no point in not saving up for an arsenal. I've seen Wasrs at $550-600, move up from that and there are kit builds of various qualities from $650-899, at the high point of one of those why not save up just a little more and buy an Arsenal?

>>22241009
Well I was really looking at a cheapo AK to get alongside a battle rifle, but you make a good point.

>>22240957

Catsit? Holy shit, when I leave town for a while I just fill bus tubs with litter, put out about 10lbs of food and 20 gal of water.

I can be gone for fucking weeks and those niggers don't give a fuck.

>>22241060
Mine are the same. Not even one single fuck is given. But I've been paid for shit like this too. Made a couple grand just for living in some ladies house while she went on a tour of europe.

>>22241060

Cats.. really dont give a shit.. and im finding out that these cats pretty much hate me and want to be left alone. Cool with me! Ill just lounge around and get paid to watch netflix

>>22241001
Are bigets as great as Europeans are always telling me they are?

Well, almost any AR you get for $500 will be shit. Maybe you could build an okay one. You can get a decent AK for $500

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>>22241001
Fancy yuro drinking fountains ain't nothin to sneeze at son,
How was it?

>>22241086
>>22241080

Gentlemen.. It was a revelation. It even had a fan to blow warm air at your butthole to dry that shit off after being penetrated by rushing water.

>>22241009
they're still around for decent prices

>>22240957
>>22241036
Get a VZ 2008

or you can go

http://www.centerfiresystems.com/ri0001.aspx

http://www.centerfiresystems.com/akakm247d.aspx

and for 50 bucks more

http://www.centerfiresystems.com/RI2087-N-2.aspx

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>>22241098

>>22241098
Oh shit that's a high end one. Do you even have to wipe with one of those bad boys?

>>22241001
He's paying you so he can fuck your sister

Remember that

>>22241112
no, but you still should imo

>>22240983
A vz58

>>22241112

Just a light patdown.. mostly to soak up the water, 0% poo residue left behind

>>22241118
I'd let a guy fuck my sister for 500 bucks and the chance to poop on a luxury toilet that cleans your butthole.

>>22241127
You don't shit in the bidet you silly bastard

>>22241118

So? He gave me full permission to bring any girls I want over. You know what that means? Unregulated self masturbation.

>>22241118

This. It's charity work so he can get brownie points with your sister. He's hoping to impress her with his kindness and maybe get some pooper action.

>>22241131
Speak for yourself. I do it all the time.

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>>22241135
>unregulated self masturbation

>>22241143
They have been dating for 5 years.. What?

>>22241122
Incredible.

>>22241131
Pretty sure he's got the kind that's built into the toilet and does the whole thing automatically.

>>22241144
This classy nigger right here

>>22241148
Just think. He's probably already blowed his load in your sister's asshole

Dozens if not hundreds of time

Just think about all that rich guy cum

>>22241122
SUGOI

get a VZ, OP

>>22241157
I'd let a rich guy plow my sister if it meant he'd invite me to rich guy parties and shit. Maybe let me borrow one of the expensive cars he never drives.

>>22241165
What are you, one of them cuckolds?

>>22241173
Well I don't need both my sisters now do I?

/k/ - European way of life

>>22241165

Speaking of which.. He left me the keys to his fucking car.

Captcha: jehoshaphat?

>>22241173
>cuckolds

You're using it out of context, unless anon is plowing his sister

>>22241189
No, that's what I meanr

>>22241187
What kind of car is it? This guy sounds like a bro.

>>22241202

Not a bro, but its one of those new kia optimas. Pretty nice too.

>>22241157
>blowed
ya blew it

>>22241213
Oh, well that sucks. Figured it'd be a Porsche or something you could cruise for poon in.

OP fuck the rifle off.

Go in for a bidet of your very own.

>>22241237

/thread

>>22241237
Seconded.

Who needs a salt rifle when you can have a clean, warm butthole?

>>22241213
>rich guy
>kia
nigga what the fuck? this guy must really not be into cars. if i hit the jackpot first thing im doing is going out and buying a grabber blue 1973 boss 429 and a brand new porsche carrera 911. then probably a house, cause im still living in the attic... shut up, my priorities are rock fucking solid.

>>22240984
Probably a rich person.

My college roommate had two neuro-surgeons for parents. They took a family vacation one year, and I got paid $3k to watch their house for 2 weeks. Yes, they literally paid me $3k to live in their mansion and play vidya on their huge ass TV for 2 weeks.

Funny part was, when they first asked me if I could housesit, and then how much I'd ask for pay, I was 2 seconds way from saying "oh, I don't need anything", thinking that they were just going to pay $100 or so.

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>>22241351
>>22241228
Naw, wealthy people don't splurge their money on things that are more expensive than they need to be, that's being nigger rich.

>>22241213
Kia has been gunning for BMW Tier the past few years

>>22241351
>priorities are rock solid
>cars

Lol. I've already planned out which cold-war era fighter jets I could buy, and still have enough for a house left over when I win the lottery.

>>22241383
>when
>win the lottery.

anon

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>>22241131

Mistakes were made.

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Op here.

Pic related. Shits wireless and even has a massage button. I will find out what turbo does at the end of the day.. I might need a shot a whiskey prior

>>22241413

Also, its a heated seat. I sat down and immediately melted.

>>22241413
Why would anyone NEED an automatic assault bidet with evil heated seats and a scary baby-killing turbo function?

>>22241413
WHERE THE FUCK CAN I GET ONE IN MERICA. WE HAVE FREEDOM GOD DAMN IT AND I WANT MY TOILET TO GIVE ME FREEDOM TOO.

>>22241413
>Feminine setting
Never thought a toilet would make me wish I was a woman. I'm sure everyone can enjoy it, but it's probably not the same.

>>22241413
>That Vortex button

Am I the only one getting aroused?

>>22241413
>>22241445
>>22241457
>>22241417

http://www.biobidet.com/

http://www.amazon.com/Supreme-BB-1000-Advanced-Toilet-Elongated/dp/B007HIKPSK/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1407165646&sr=8-4&keywords=bio+bidet


>$500

forget the VZ 58, AR or AK, buy the fucking bidet

>>22241499
Seriously OP, you won't be able to go back to pooping like a poor person.

/k/ a magical place

>dat high speed spider stance

>>22241539
>tfw you can have that stance without fear of getting skidmarks

Buy the bidet, OP. Also, I'm expecting a full report on the Turbo function.

>>22241499
cerakote the bidet

>>22241557
No soldering iron stippling?

do they sell these things in Greece? My girlfriend left me over the shit paper

>>22241499
duck tape a fucking glock to your bidet and call it day

>>22241571
It's on amazon so

>>22241571
Is all the paper in Greece shit or do you just cheap out?

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>This whole thread

I love you /k/.

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>>22241573
>>22241553

Reporting in from operating with Vortex: ON. Things went south, really fast. Cannot trust Bidet.. Must remove shit

>>22241651
This picture needs /k/ a magical place chopped someone please I'm at work and can't.

>>22241651
>Things went south, really fast.

Oh, anon...

>>22241651
Hows it feel to be raped?

>>22241413
>After a few minutes, strain your abdomen to eliminate the waste matter from yuor system.

>>22241413
04.08.2014
The day a bidet made /k/ fall in love.

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>>22241417
>>22241499
By the bidet. He commands you

>>22241701

That smug as picture.. I bet his fanboys are his own personal bidet who spit on his as until cleansed.

>>22241379
>Naw, wealthy people don't splurge their money on things that are more expensive than they need to be

You must be joking. Look up conspicuous consumption. It was invented in the 80s, by rich bankers.

>>22241756
>rich bankers

Please, don't let this gem turn into a /pol/ thread.

>>22241351
>buying a grabber blue 1973 boss 429

I don't give a shit what they say about you anon, you're a good man.

>>22241135
>self masturbation.

As opposed to the other kind of masturbation? lol

>>22241835
>2014
>Not knowing about mutual masturbation

>>22241791
Just stating facts, anon. I didn't say I hated bankers, though I probably do. They hate you too, so don't worry.

>>22241855

Mutual jerkoff more like. Masturbation is touching yourself not others.

REMOVE BIDET

>>22241651
Details? Was it like getting a rimjob from a fire hose?

>>22241701

>Hickok45 here at the compound. Today we're gonna try something a little different. You know compagnies like to send me stuff to test. I usually only do guns but the folks at BioBidet asked me if I wanted to try their last high end toilet and it sounded too good to pass.
>let's see what we can do
>*rubs hands*
>you know what, let's do a little bit of "torture testing" while we're at it
>I'll put ears on...
>pants off
>the seat is a wee bit small for big me, but I believe there are after market seats so you can replace your
>here we go!
>BBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
>ha-ho!
>I think I still have some ammo left. In the meantime Let's educate you a little about the history of toilets, while we're at it
>*goes on a 15mn rant retracing the way people pooped from the 1800s to this day*
>oh-oh, here's the last of it
>GONG GONG GONG GONG GONG
>OK! *rubs hands again* let's take my ears off and see how we operate this beauty
>so I guess you first you use this "posterior" function
>*splashing noises*
>hoho sweet sweet
>I wonder what this "vortex" button does
>*whirling and splashing noises"
>WEEEEE!
>hey folks, you know I'm a man but let's try this "feminine" functions, just for kicks. Also it might help to educate my female viewers. This one's for you ladies!
>*both the toilet and Hickok chortle*
>You know, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this
>alright let's wrap things up and dry everything
>WHOUSH
>*gleeful laughing*
>let's put it on turbo!
>WHOUUUUUSHSHHHHH
>oh man this is really something. My testicles are flapping in the wind right now.
>ok should be alright by now
>I still feel some moistness here and there that the fan didn't quite reach, I'll even it out the old fashioned way with some paper.
>Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. The paper was supplied by Federal. Thanks Federal!
>and here we go folks. Pooping our way into the future at the compound
>I hope it was informative and not too boring
>see you next time folks
>Life is Good

>>22242077
It felt like reverse diarrhea. Warm, liquidy, and in the ass

>>22242106
Sounds pleasant

>>22242101
10/10

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>>22242101

>/k/- Bidets

>>22241756
>a behavior that has been with mankind since the neolithic revolution if not even earlier
>nah, it was invented in the 1980s by evil banKKKsters
>implying the person I'm responding to even knows what the neolithic revolution was
>implying I'm not Abu Umar al-Baghdadi, shitposting in between campaigns

>>22242270
>implying I called anyone evil

>>22242377
AHEM. So about that AK-47/Bidet...

>>22242420
I think this thread has answered that dilema quite well. Bidet it is.

>>22242420
>>22242439
yes get the bidet

>>22241118
for 500 bucks, a full stocked fridge, fancy ass butt fountain, and the chance to live large and bring girls over (translation: jerk off in every room) ?
also considering they were likely already fucking?
And the fact that I'm mature enough not to care what people do on their own time?
hell ducking yes

>>22240957
AK

>>22240957

http://www.classicfirearms.com/romanian-ak-7-62-x-39semiautowasr-10

^WASR 10 for $500

THey also have a Yugo M70 for $450 but it has the narrow mag well for single stack magazines.

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>>22241651
OH SHIT OP THE TOILETS ARE UPRISING

>>22243251

So are the toasters, apparently.

8/4/2014: The bidet has now officially replaced the Kube as /K/'s new object of worship

>>22242834
Not OP but are the WASR 10s at classic new production? I've heard mixed reviews about Romanian AKs but from what I gather the new production ones are decent, especially at that price.

>>22243428
>>22242834
don't buy the WASR, they need to drop to $350 to be worth buying again.

Let them keep dropping in price

>>22243428
I don't know, has a chrome lined barrel at least.

>>22243428
Yes.
>>22243450
They will not drop below 450 ever again. 500 is a good price for what you're getting.

>>22243450
But I want to make bang noises now. What AKs are worth it at a $400-$500 price point?

>>22241157
>not wanting you sister to end up with a rich successful guy

Lets be honest, your sister, like all women, is going to get the D; might as well be a successful, pleasant guy giving it to her, and not some fuckhead.

>>22243504
WASR, NPAP, to a lesser degree C39s.

>>22243503
>>22243514
Alright probably gonna go with the WASR then, thanks. Centerfire Systems has a cheaper ak but its only $30 less and the lack of manufacturer makes me worry.

What should I look out for when I receive the rifle at my FFL? I've heard canted sights and mag wobble are the two biggest issues. Anything else I should be worried about?

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I've reached the next level, the apartment I got set up with while working my current gig in Asia has a bidet and a shower with 9 different settings. It has 4 high pressure blasters, 2 over head faucets (one directly above the middle of the shower area and one traditional overhead, and one of those hand operated faucet for those hard to reach places. Pro tip: the 2nd lowest high pressure hose is at dick / anus level. Shower sex has never felt so good.

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>>22242101
saved

>>22244798

Thanks anon! Fucking cash

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>>22242101
>>22244798
what the fuck did i just experience

>>22242101
my sides are in orbit

>>22243546
You might want to look more into the NPAP M70s. I got one about a year ago at $450 from J&G, its amazing build quality, nothing canted or done wrong, def higher quality by far than any WASR i've seen.

That being said, this was a year ago and I hear that batches both before and after when I bought have had varying standards of quality. If you can find a good one though its absolutely superior to a WASR

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>>22242101

>>22240957
>making money
>retarded

Man has to do what he has to do OP. Were it me i would wait for a PSA sale and try to piece together an AR. $500 might not get it all done but it would get you a lot of the way there.

>>22240957

Not gonna get much of either AR or AK for $500.

The thing most people forget about owning a weapon..or most high ticket items for that matter is that the cost of owning it goes far beyond what you initially pay to buy it.

Are you even going to be able to afford to feed it, clean it and take it to the range on a semi-regular basis?