Uncle Kiwi

The situation here could be worse as always. At least I don't have a lecture today.

>>54861741
I feel my Deutschbro, I feel.

Hopefully things get brighter for my German friends

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I'm loving how much Australians are triggered about losing to a third world Mongolid team in CSGO

>>54861781

I can't really see that, but eventhough the maymays imply something different we'll probably just become as shitty as france and GB.
What's on your mind?

>>54861850
I just feel like couping up in my room senpai chu feel. My liberal family think I support Trump so if I go out there they'll trigger in my face.

>>54861833
I missed this meme bruv, fill Uncle Kiwi in.

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>>54861682
Tonight I am cooking some rice and watching cooking videos of this really cheerful lady

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-Y9CXGRJPU

I hope your day picks up Uncle Kiwi

Don't forget to do some squats and splash some cold water on yourself/do a cold water shower (these things release some testosterone, so you might feel a bit more energetic or happy) and to get some sunshine (serotonin boost). You can also do some stretching...All of these are lazy ways to feel a little better. I hope any of that helps you, Ojisan.

>>54861833
I was about to ask you if there are even any Aussies that actually care about Esports; but then I realised this is 4chan and it's probably swimming with nerds and hermits that watch it like an actual event.

>>54861930
hey thank u dear american friend.

I feel like I should do more Uncle Kiwi threads, because usually we have some good times in them.

I hope ur rice is extra extra tasty my bro <3

>>54861895
It's an awful meme created by a desperate Pole revolving around e"""sports""". It shows how much the quality has gone down in this board 2bh.

>>54861956
Kekus, what a bit of banter.

Poles are pretty cheeky lads tbqh

My gf is snoozing next to me and I'm just about going to sleep. Goodnight Uncle Kiwi, it will get better for you.

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>>54861895
So far I've heard three competing ideas on what's actually caused the meme and not a one of them has any evidence behind it.

>>54861982
truly i am amused.

I want updates in this thread boys, Uncle Kiwi needs to find out.

>>54861895
tl;dw Mongolian team beats Australian team 15-2

Start at 8:20

https://youtu.be/KPJ6RwJ8MS4

>>54862007
my poor aussie lads

First we beat them in cricket, then they lose le vidya to Mongols.

Truly, a bad month for them.

I wake up in the morning and I ask myself

tomorrow will be better! unfortunately I have to sleep now, because I have a meeting tomorrow..goodnight and may god bless you uncle kiwi!

>>54862124
hehe thank u my dear yank friend, have a good sleep and god bless u too!

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>>54862006
Okay well first somebody said it was something about an Australian CSGO team losing to a Mongolian team because the Aussie internet died or something. Then somebody said it was actually some poof in Melbourne that spent ages trying to woo a Mongolian woman on Interpals, only to get her to Aus, find out it's a trap and have sex with the creature, anyway. Then the third one was that apparently that Polish poster that's obsessed with Australia just made it up to force a meme, then was joined by a few others and it just stuck.
But again, no evidence for any of the three claim, so I have no idea what the fuck's going on.

>>54862193
pretty funny desu, i'll keep an eye out for anything.

I'll do another Uncle Kiwi thread tomorrow and we can updatus on it.

>>54862222
I've since seen some stuff posted about the Aussie CSGO team just being legitimately beaten by the Mongolian team. I'm satisfied, I'm not going to be looking into it any further.

>>54861682
>thread full of first worlders bitching about how shit their day to day lives are even if they are the 10% of the world
Pussies, pussies the lot of you

>>54862460
I'd ask you to vent, but nobody cares about your problems.

>>54862460
My gypsy friend, you are welcome too. Tell Uncle Kiwi about your day.

>>54862476
There's that classic Aussie banter! You guys sure are silly :)

>>54861871
My colleagues think I support Trump.

It doesn't help that I say "can't stump the trump" all the time tho

>>54861945
>Esports
Just call them sports bro. What you are referring to as sports, are actually Psports.

>>54862585
it's a fierce pain my lad.

I actually support Rubio for the GOP nom and Bernie for Dems, but I get accused of being a Trump supporter because I'm anti-immigration.

>>54862639
>Just call them sports
If I considered them proper sports, I would.

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>>54862568
But I'm not bantering. Prove me wrong, go on and legitimately care about that guy's problems. I dare you to even try.

>>54862663
But they are proper sports

Any other kiwis going to the Christchurch reddit meet up?

>>54862690
No, proper sports are where a pro runs for 30+ minutes and is surrounded by other people that could carry a conversation in a real life social setting. Then they have after parties where sluts throw themselves at them and there's even more of that dreaded beast social activity.

>>54862823
But that happens with sports like Starcraft and League of Legends in Korea and China.

>>54862855
I thought they treated their "athletes" like slaves though and they hardly ever got an opportunity to reap the benefits of being a famous "athlete".

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>>54861682
My evening is going well. Had a good day at work, now I'm listening to music and wishing my internet was good enough to play video games.

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>>54862956
>American
>Internet not good enough to play games
I don't buy it. Even I can do that here.

>>54863100
Nice dubs, but I live in the closest thing to Australia there is in the US.

My ISP is literally Stalin.

>>54861682
I'm worried I'm never going to get a job

>>54861682
>I'm feeling pretty shit today and I want to hear people are okay
Wow, exactly like my uncle

Im in a ski resort but the weather is shit today so I'll just stay inside and play roguelikes.

>>54863100
Not him, but i'm on a college campus, and unless there is a massive depopulation of people here, like they go home for the weekend or something, my internet is too shit to play anything.

>>54863517
I know the feeling bruv, damn Chinese and Indians are taking everthing

Hello fellow Kiwi,
Just drinking some Stoli and funposting as always

Thank fuck it's cooling down here in Auckland

>>54862007
This is dizzy stuff

>>54861682
I'm sick uncle kiwi. Coughing, vomiting and sweaty past few days.

Tell me a story about from where you grew up.

>>54863778
Aucklandbro, hope your stoli is good!!

It was very hot here in Wellington today, and I had to walk around, was not fun.

Enjoy your evening familio!

>>54862901
They've got athletic minds

>>54863952
My dear Yankus friend, this is no good :(

When I was growing up, at high school, our school went into lockdown because a guy was driving at incredilby hihg sped nearby. We all laughed at the police, it was quite funny!

Hope u feel better my friend, please go see doctorino!!!!

>>54863517

Uncle Kiwi here

I hope u find work my friend, is bad times here in NZ for employment. Maybe try army or police?

Good luck friend!

bought some kimchi today. holy fuck this stuff is good. been eating it by its lonesome, but ill have it with rice and fried eggs for brekky tomoz.

>>54864039
why do i feel like i know you irl

do you live in Wellington?

>>54864072

na, auckland

>>54864110
fuggg, uncle kiwi has a friend in Wgtn who is mucho into asiatic food.

HAKA

>>54864039
Where did you get it? I've only tried some shit cheap stuff but even that wasn't bad.

>>54864246

imart, 5 wakefield st in cbd

>>54861682
>I'm feeling pretty shit today and I want to hear people are okay.

What's wrong Uncle Kiwi?

>>54866633
I just randomly felt sad and stuff, I'm trying to get with a girl who may just be Auntie Kiwi.

I don't really know if I'll clinch it with her so Uncle Kiwi is feelin bretty boopy atm :(

>>54861682
Are you sad because your sad shark is badly shopped ?

>>54867013
Uncle Kiwi doesn't like Koreans.

Uncle Kiwi might ask his friend with Korean gf to fuck her a little bit harder tonight :(

After all, why would Korean women go for Korean men when they could have men with actual penises?

Uncle Kiwi's threads are places of positivity, so fugg off

>>54862193
So its a forced meme

>>54866915
Don't be sad Uncle Kiwi, confidence is key! Believe in yourself and don't undersell yourself! You can do it!

>>54867636
thankus Nephew Norway!

>>54861682
We are becoming a pariah state like North Korean on every front. Throw in the nanny state and we can conclude that Australia is run by totally incompetent morons. We are also the people who had the biggest resources boom in history and have nothing to show for it! We are also about to destroy one of the greatest health care models in the world and we also concluded that building the NBN as FTTP is a bad idea. Our leaders should be proud they have the IQ and administration abilities of fools like Mugabe and Zuma and others in Africa. We are fast becoming a country run by Monkeys.