Whole house stinks because my slag of a sister has curry fever and a new paki boyfriend every month. Fucking parents won't hear it. Instead of disowning her they just told me to be more tolerant and outgoing like her. It's almost like they want half breed grandkids.
I think we should disband the military entirely and scrap trident. We can employ ex-soldiers on construction sites building houses for refugees, hire more foreign nurses for the NHS, and expand the BBC budget
Just want to stick my head in the oven desu.
How can she even find them attractive?
Imagine finding out that there was a small community of people online who were completely obsessed with you and you didn't even know it.
They are obsessed with one image of you in particular that you look a long time ago and have probably forgot exists and they manipulate and photoshop it in various different ways - there are at least several hundred different variations of this image and more are being made all the time.
In addition to this, they analyse the vlogs you upload to YouTube. Every single word, every inflection, every twinge of a facial muscle, they know it and they recite it amongst themselves gleefully.
They look at your tweets and forum posts, they argue over what those things say about you as a person, they piece them together to get a life story, an outline of your personality.
Imagine being Kev.
>there are kids ITT who have never used a VCR or a floppy disk, never taped songs off the radio, and have never heard of minidisc
M8, I fucking wish. Over here all the slags want a brown boyfriend because "it's exotic". It's disgusting is what it is.
HE HAS NO STYLE
HE HAS NO GRACE
THIS KEV HAS A SWEATY FACE
CAN OBSERVE THE WEATHER WHEN HE NEEDS TO
AND WALK TOWARDS THE CAMERA JUST FOR YOU
"ON MY WAY HOME FROM DUBLIN", THAT'S WHAT HE'D SAY
THIS CRAZY KEV JUST HATES THIS MOHAI-MOTORWAY
Why do you joke about janitors and their lack of pay?
Obviously they are rich af to be able to spend all day on the computer. Jannys are probably trust fund babbies, sipping cognac beside their pool.
While you laugh at them, thinking you are better than them, THEY are actually laughing at YOU
>/brit/ is more interested in running the fedora meme to the ground than posting top slags
Bunch of benders I tells ya
Just stopping by in this thread to say that every generation believes that Wagon Wheels were bigger when they were kids. It's a universal constant.
>When you cum quickly and don't want to be embarrassed so you keep fucking her with your floppy dick
>smoked weed for the first time when I was 18 at my sixth forms leavers party
>my oneitis wrote on Facebook the day after "can't believe anon smoked weed last night haha"
>about 10 replies from other qt girls Ive literally never spoke to saying stuff like "did he really? Awww he's so cute"
WHAT DID THEY MEAN BY THIS?
IS BEING "CUTE" A GOOD THING?
It means they're not intimidated by you, it is ESSENTIAL that you establish dominance when you meet them irl
Sitting in picture-perfect Peak District grounds, Chatsworth House seems an unlikely birthplace for today's global banana industry.
But practically every banana consumed in the western world is directly descended from a plant grown in the Derbyshire estate's hothouse 180 years ago.
>guy playing guitar in streets
>looks extremely poor
>starts playing Hurt
Makes sense holy shit
>my oneitis bent over to pick something up
>one of her mates said "haha anons getting a good look at your arse"
>she instantly turned around and said "anons not like that"
What she was saying was "anons not looking at my arse because he's a beta and he's too afraid"
>cuckold means that you want your wife to fuck other men
no, it just means your wife has fucked other men
It has only taken on the former meaning because of /pol/'s weird obsession with coalburning
don't about uk but match and eharmony are probably the best chance of actually getting a date, although the women tend to be late 20s and up and at least in the case of eharmony rather keen on marriage
it should be with someone you love and would like to impregnate, and yes, i am a virgin waiting for the perfect woman. what's so bad about that? i could capture any woman if i wanted to, but i don't.
Gave a tramp £10 last week lads. Hope he didn't spend it all on drugs.
>got an exam tomorrow morning which may mean getting kicked out of uni if I fail it
>done no work towards it whatsoever
When I was about 15 we had a really big (bearmode) English teaching assistant. I remember my m8 asked him how much he weighed and he said "19 stone" but no one understood. We bantered him a bit about how big a stone was.
Good lad desu I learned a lot
Gave a tramp a handjob last week lads. Hope he didn't film it
>the Queen dies
>every /brit/ thread is a Queen is dead long live the King edition
>histrionic anime cunts will STILL try to force their shitty editions
To be honest mate lad you could join the FFL or another army that takes foreigners as they won't have your medical records and cant legally access them abroad.
One of my mates was exempt from conscription because of something he'd done when he was a kid (minor self harm) so joined the FFL. They only have the ability to check your Interpol record.
saw someone give a roma tramp a fiver in edinburgh and she was absolutely ecstatic, staring at the note as if she couldn't believe it was real, praising god
so what if he did spend it on drugs, that's the only enjoyment he has in his miserable existence
>basically a billionaire from making a few tv shows
Sounds good desu
If WW3 kicks off and the shit truly hits the fan, I'm sure I'll be able to join some kind of foreign militia like the PKK. Don't really care who I fight for so long as I get to fight and then die.
How the fuck is that possible, do you have cancer?
I'm 6ft and 12 stone and you can see my hip bones and ribs, cannot imagine being 40lbs lighter, I would look like I was on the verge of death
This desu, the FFL see a lot of action too as the French state/public are less precious about non-French casualties/fatalities. Always off propping up/toppling regimes in West Africa haha
Heard it's quite a tough selection process though.
This book is completely based, you should read it.
Dream about going through a plane crash where the only survivors are me and a qt 16 year old virgin girl. We'd wash up on a desert island where I'd comfort her and we would fall in love.
*hides behind a corner waiting for you to come by*
hears your foot steps
*sees your shadow approaching my general direction*
*jumps out and shouts "FUCK OFF YANK" right into your ear canal*
>Heard it's quite a tough selection process though
Physically, it's apparently about the same as a British Army infantry regiment (unless you want to go in the REP, in which case it's like the Paras). It's mentally much harder though, they fuck with you a lot
this is just what I've heard though
>too lazy to go to the gym
>spent ~£600 on home gym equipment
>too lazy to use it
Got chased over a park by a chav with a machete once, I could hear him behind me an he kept saying "I'm gonna get you lad!"
It was very scary ngl
Some of his slaggy female chav friends were there and I could hear them laughing, the little cunts
been orange for me for nearly half an hour
>trust me, I have insider knowledge direct from his therapist.
>All you need for a home gym is a bench, a set of adjustable dumbells and a pull-up bar
stands, an olympic bar, a plate set. plywood and rubber mats. You can make some stuff yourself, atlas stone moulding is p easy
>money doesn't equal happiness
Absolute bollocks, my life would be ten times better if I owned my own house, had a nice car and had money to go on holiday a few times per year. Fuck off with your philosophising
I'm rich as fuck
My parents are multi millionaires and I will never have to worry about money or paying bills or what's going to happen because of whatever financial shit or job markets etc
I am also extremely depressed and haven't been happy in many years
is it cheating if it is with a prozzie? surely not
>parents are millionaires
>live in a mansion
>never wanted for anything material
>wake up every day with no reason to get out of bed
Yeah, money doesn't make you happy and you're an utterly spiritually bankrupt capitalist drone if you think that
There are people far, far happier than me living in slums and struggling to get by
All money buys you is comfort and convenience
>You're just a fucking pleb who thinks that a nice holiday and owning a home will make you happy
I'm not poor, fuck off billionaire. Also, you're a pleb because you have money yet you still find reasons to be miserable. Stop being such a special snowflake and grow up.
>straight edge kids that need to constantly remind everybody that they're straight edge
We're inviting immigrants in by the millions and only building a few hundred tiny houses here and there. Never.
Money does not cause happiness
I know that's hard for poor people like you to comprehend because you're obsessed with what you don't have and think that just a little more and you'd be all good but that's simply untrue
Lads can you get arrested/sued for torrenting a film
On the comments of a film I want to torrent and there are some people saying that several got sued for downloading that specific torrent
Money helps you to get over those problems. Normal people have to get on with their daily grind and be stressed out all the time and worry about bills etc. Rich people can just fuck off on holiday to take their mind off things.
That's not how it works
If you think all stress goes away when you don't have to worry about money then you're obviously a poor cunt who doesn't have any
Life is far more complex then the bills that come in the mail