/brit/

What's it like to get naked with a girl for the first time lads?

halo

pakis around

she's a big girl

>>53258341
Stop making early threads you fat fucking seppo cunt

>>53258368
she's not a girl she's an alien

Maisie

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me and all my mates out on the pull

me on the left

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>>53258341

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>early yank

Playing it safe for now

>>53258375
I swear to god I'm going to kill myself one of these days if you keep being mean to me

>>53258346
tricked you all along

so rekt

>>53258383
What's a Toronto Maple Leaf?

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CARA

>>53258253

R E A L L Y

A

R

E

Never ever heard of that country before and im bretty gud on flags

https://youtu.be/_OLUSELxFok

>brazil

http://www.travesticomlocal.com.br/acompanhante/narizinho/

>>53258394
Good I cannot bear look at another pool of textual dribble that escapes your fucking head and makes its way onto a Chinese lint ball collection post-it board

>>53258401
Shitty team

>>53258390
that girl in your pic appears to be quite promiscuous desu

>>53258368
meaning?

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Just finished The Signal

What the fuck did I just watch

When a man loves a woman...

>>53258392
okiedoke popplet

>>53258440
'The signal'

Red pill me on coca leaves/tea

>>53258440
The Signal is a 2014 American science fiction thriller film directed by William Eubank and co-written with Carlyle Eubank and David Frigerio.

>>53258436
I will be haunting you from beyond the grave. Every post you make, every (You) you get, I'll be watching you. Waiting for the perfect moment to destroy you

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redpill me on the wire lads

>>53258406
that "country" first came to light to me when it hit the UK news in 2004 because of an island wide sexual abuse scandal which basically proved most of the senior members of the society were sex offenders

ello poppet

>>53258440
Jacob's Ladder is better

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>you will never grow up in the 90s on a cosy street in America in a semi-large house and have a few mates where you just ride around on bikes all day

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>Red pill me on coca leaves/tea

>>53258437
Why name a team after a leaf?
Is your country really that much of a meme?

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>>53258474
Second best only to the sopranos

I'm never going to have sex am I lads?

>>53258440
dont post scary films please i wont be able to sleep

>>53258473
You'll have to endure my rancid late night smells so jokes on you dickhead

>>53258383
what am i watching?

>>53258485

I did this

>>53258483
SAW FLAG AND DIDN'T READ YOUR POST LOL

>>53258485
Thank fuck. I'd take footie in roads and cider in the park anyday

>>53258496
SHUT UP WITH THAT FUCKIN MOUTH

>>53258506
me on the pull

>>53258515
delete this

australians on death watch after i fucking rekt them in the last thread

>>53258512
>you will never travel across 4 states in your parents old beat up car

>>53258505
Vengeful spirits don't have a sense of smell

>>53258485
>Virginia
No thanks

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>>53258506
dunno

webm's sometimes dont work for me

growing a beard

>>53258539
Lol I bet you get invited to many parties and have had many girlfriends :)

>>53258485
I did that but in australia instead of america

>>53258523
>tfw when you will never have a game of curbs again

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I just want to love

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>australians on death watch after i fucking rekt them in the last thread

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>>53258498
ʰᵉᶫᵖ

>>53258542
My wet farts transcend the etheral plane

>>53258553
actually none

kek too easy fucking rekt the cunt again

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Heat's off.

Done an odd activity

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>>53258553
>projecting this hard

>>53258556
Same

Me, my brother, and a mate of ours use to go skating and ding dong ditch old Italian women when we were like 10. Then we use to go into the local Italian supermarket, film them, and watch them get mad

>>53258579
I'll hold my breath

I am scared of the dark lol

When I watch horror movies where the husband gets up in the middle of the night and investigates after hearing a strange noise, I just sit there wondering how and why the fuck

>>53258468
Look into betel nut it's a plant you chew that has the same effect as cocaine

>>53258589
>actually none

I know sweetie (:

>>53258617
Misread this is as "my husband" haha

yanks did this.

currently watching two girlies rub their very large boobies against one another

>>53258622
betel nut gives severe oral cancer

>>53258653
If abused much like cigs

>>53258617
beta as fuck

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Post slags

>>53258553
>parties
FONT
O
N
T

rebember if you r 1 of the many posters who posts links itt i don't even look at them lol

>>53258622
Isn't it more like caffeine, but carcinogenic

lads, I can easily talk to basic slags on tinder for a fair while

but all I really want is an interesting qt gf
i swear some girls were actually interesting and not just boring pretty twats when i was in school

literally no point in even talking to girls if they're just gonna be disappointing...

>>53258686
Feels like mild coke

>>53258617
i was about 13 before i could sleep comfortably in a totally dark room

>>53258691
Yeah I always swipe left to the club slags on tinder (tbf they'd almost certainly swipe left to me too) cause they just seem vapid

You gotta go for the girls with the alt look, familia

>>53258709
How much coke does it take to get you going? I shared 0.7 with a couple of my mates on NYE (first and only time) and I barely felt anything

>>53258593
i appreciate the technical skill, most convincing, expertly blended. but this is an exceedingly obscure subject; odd indeed

as a result unfortunately i cannot rate it as highly as last nights artwork

>>53258726
loser

>>53258737
get drunk then .3 of decent should be good

>>53258737
You were sniffing chalk mate

>>53258732
what about girls who have some club photos but some normal ones too

>>53258737
It was shit coke then, I've had a gram of good coke last me and someone else 3 nights desu, we were both off our nuts for hours

>>53258757
>>53258763
Fug :DDD

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>at least 10 times as many lurkers as posters

how does it feel that every post of yours gets judged by over 1000 eyes

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>>53258803

>>53258788
so autistic but this literally makes me laugh most times i see it

People don't forget. Nothing gets forgiven

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>>53258821
Spurdo basically got me through my depression

>>53258814
>this is the kind of person who reads my posts

gross
STOP LOOKING AT IT

>>53258765
Uh depends

Got any pics? The best ones are the ones who have any of the following aesthetics for their photos
>photo of a Polaroid
>photo of a webcam shot of themself
>webcam of themself on a white background with hearts and shit around their face
>poorly exposured photos of themself
>photos where they're looking away from the camera

Kind of hard to illustrate what I mean t bh
Bonus points:
>funny bio
>mutual interests that aren't givens (e.g. Google, maccas)

>>53258842
glad you're feelin better la, looking forward to your well-placed spurdos soon (no pressure)

>>53258506
Me introducing myself to a girl haha

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>tfw remembering the amount of times i ran into my parents room insisting that there was a monster under my bed as an 8 year old

i'm 19 and it still makes me cringe

>>53258691
>i swear some girls were actually interesting and not just boring pretty twats
i always assume why this is a ubiquitous opinion among men is due to their overwhelming egocentricism

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>>53258875
Feels burdo bordo man :DDDD

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KzuL-G2ni-M

John Renbourn

wonder if ill have sex at university this time?

wait let me answer that myself nope its chuck testa lol x))))

Don't understand how people of the opposite star sign are meant to be best suited to each other

How can you like someone you are completely opposite to

>>53258860
yeah i do like those ones

i dont mind obscure bands in common but i get a bit sus that it might be a ploy. i also like very nice names that arent slaggy.

>>53258743
I understand and accept your judgement. Was struck by sudden compulsion and as such it is a very personal work.

>>53258929
Opposites attract la

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfuR9abuwyk

>>53258929
like how positive magnuts connect to negative ones opposites attract dummy

Kind of ot but i thought this would be a good place to ask.

Is it consider pretty taboo to lie about having served in the british military? To say you have when you never did

>>53258950
Doubt itd be a ploy senpai. Fake accounts tend not to like pages

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would you rather
>the ability to achieve immortality or incredible long life through genetic engineering, bionics or transferring consciousness being available within our lifetimes for all of society (so you can live for hundreds of years with your loved ones theoretically)
or
>reincarnation is real and you are reborn as a human being born as you die, with only the faintest subconscious locked memories from your previous lives that you can only rarely see in your dreams (so you could be reincarnated as a qt jap girl)

>>53258973
Yes. They are called walts.

>>53258962
>open link
>utter shit trash
>close link
>hide post

Reddit has better banter than every british and australian person combined

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>>53258979
>such a deep, thought provoking question. i doff my cap to you sir

>>53258803
who does this?
I post in almost every thread I lurk.

>>53259011
FORT

>>53258976
nah i mean girls like them just to be different and everything

i get a tiny bit suss but i'll let it slide

want to make hot cocoa but i got a belly going
wat do

>>53259013
you did it wrong haha

>>53258477
Wasn't there also widespread incest?

>>53259024
Tbf I like band pages to on the sly let people know I have an obscure taste in music

>>53258979
>transferring consciousness
to what?

>>53259040
Literal 10 year old you mean

>>53259040
bit young to be posted on here then...

>>53259040
low test beta

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rate

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>>53258979

>>53259040
H-how old is she?

Imagine if the migrant crisis consisted of white people coming from Ukraine instead of muzzies, would be so much better desu

>>53259084
WE
WOZ
VIKINGS

>>53258406
>>53258477
>>53259058
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pitcairn_sexual_assault_trial_of_2004

>>53259084

>hating places you never been with people you've never met

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>>53259106

>>53258957
>and as such it is a very personal work
yes assumed that might have been the case

oh well never mind. i do prefer suprises in the edits line after all, so it stands to reason ill favour some more than others. but make it more relatable next time or ill see you hang

>>53259064
hahaha good lad

i had to clean my likes up. there were some odd ones there from when i was like 17

>>53259079
>>53259080
>>53259083
>>53259106
Literally posted in every fap thread

>>53259075
another body

clones, artificial body, etc

pretty bummed that i'm going to die a virgin lads

>>53259177
We can die together non-virgins, lad

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stupid melts

haha only gone and bought a 3 ciggies off some yob in the street aint i

doing a go

>>53259165
So that just blows any potential out of the second option where you're losing everything for the genetic lottery.

The first one you could just choose a clone and maintain your knowledge and experience.

>>53259209
The Madrid lad? Well in

>>53259215
saying a bye

>>53259219
that's just like, your opinion m

>>53259177
maybe because you have an unhealthy liking for a video game character and you are overweight

fuck sake I have got one of those black dot floaty vision things that always stay in the same spot when I look around

>>53259234
*gives you a cigarette*

Lads what goes well with a chicken sandwich?

>>53259177
>virgin
>pretty bummed
>bummed
impossible lad

>>53259250
hold still lad
*waits a second then punches you in the temple as hard as i can*

ahahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAH

>>53259250
see you in the next life

>>53259262

A milkshake and some bacon cheddar fries

>>53259232
was b8, they were spanish version of cool kids and i asked, bought em, and then another matey said something about my shoes or trackies and i walked off doing autistically fast walk

>>53259259
thanks lad you want twos?

>>53259299
You're alri m8, got a fresh deck init

>>53259293
Not even remotely funny or interesting

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banned from /vg/ so I figure i'll post my finished eu4 game here 2bh
whole thing is literally about to explode in a million different rebellions because I blobbed too hard at the end

>>53259334
did the man colour the map

>>53259332
lamoed

>>53259262
rip torn being mad @ u

really craving some chocolate cookies rn

I want a grilled cheese sandwich but my oven is broken lads. What the fuck do i use?

>>53259313
I thought it was the opposite? I never get sick tbH

>>53259313 answer this

>>53259334
wannaberome/10

>>53259355
what are you insinuating?

>>53259394
t. Robert Paulson

>>53259373
fix the oven you cunt but in the meantime just eat fried bacon

im going to go punch my pillow and pretend its a yank

Frankfurt: Several women have reported New Year sexual assaults to police
Hamburg: At least 53 cases of harassment, of which 39 are of sexual harassment, have been reported
Helsinki: 3 reported sexual assaults on women
Zürich: A total of about 6 women now say they were sexually assaulted
Salzburg: Several women in the Austrian city of Salzburg have said they were sexually assaulted on New Year’s Eve
Cologne: More than 120 sexual assaults, rapes and robberies have been reported outside the city's railway station and Cathedral
Latest reports:
Police in Cologne 'struggled to gain control during mass sexual assaults'
Reports: Cologne NYE assaulters were largely asylum-seekers
Cologne New Year's attackers could face deportation, German official says
German Muslims Condemn Cologne Attacks, Fear Consequences
Cologne Divided Over Who to Blame for New Year's Assaults
Reports of New Year's Eve sex assaults in Cologne fuel German migrant debate
Cologne New Year gang assaults: Victim, 18, says up to 30 men groped and robbed her and her 11 friends
German officials say that a series of sexual assaults and thefts that took place during New Year's Eve celebrations in the western city of Cologne were likely part of a coordinated effort by a criminal gang.
Zurich police investigate New Year sexual assaults, no link to German cases

why are immigrants so uncivilised

Trading in sexual favours for wishing me good night

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well now im going to bed. goodnight ye saucy boys

>>53259440
suck my ween

>>53259431
because they're from 2nd/3rd world countries

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>>53259423
goood, gooooood

just wanked to some milfs

>>53259467
mums shop at iceland

>>53259467
mums shop at iceland

>>53259456
should leave them in those countries tbqh

>>53259440
goodnight

SAY IT LOUD

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>why are immigrants so uncivilised

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42D6bUta1gs

choooooon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=awNqLO6auQA

very important song lads

>>53259461
>that filename
>an ostrich
can't tell if bait tbqh

>>53259478
>>53259489
wew

>>53259423
>>53259461
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=T2EXCun-ejU

>>53259507
there's this american busker guy that plays something like country music or this new hipster shit near my house
absolutely amazing desu

>>53258368
FOR YOU

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>>53259516
more in the same vein

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYpdLb6eKg8

>>53259523
;)

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>>53259501
>yanks make a valuable contribution to /brit/ discussion

Lads I cucked a yank manlet last night.

Me and some lads were at the local watering hole having a pint or 10, when we got chatting to a group of tourists.

One of the girls was pretty cute so I engaged her in a conversation, not long after I realised her boyfriend was sitting next to her.

Anyway the night wore on and next thing I know I was hooking up with her, the fucking boyfriend was still sitting there lol. Got her digits and all, hopefully I can bang her before she leaves.

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need a tranny gf

these muscle relaxers are hitting me hard af lads I'm on cloud nine

think my dad might be going mental lads

>>53259570
look at this literal normie
are you a 10

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Why yes my good sir, I am indeed an aussie.

>>53259570
Good lad

>>53259570
alpha as fuck

>>53259586
why

>>53259554
theyre better than aussies *like lolz so randumbz* Xd

>>53259594
nah, probably 6 or 7 but I carry myself with confidence which puts you higher

oi yank

what's your endgame

also what do you look like - are you ugly?

>>53259442
Impressed by your independent pic-sourcing lately lad.

Night xxx

>>53259570
>>53259609
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CASGNmf0Pec

best in the game it was bait we were gonna be here
(EEEEE)
roll deep is the name and we're up for awards all year

>>53259630
are you the serbian druggie or the serbian fuckboy

>>53259624
She was pretty saucy, literally rubbing my cock in front of everyone. We were all plastered though so no one gave a fuck.

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>oh, didn't i mention? i'm from the united states of america

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>A teenager died due to his excessive use of deodorant instead of showering, an inquest has heard.
>Thomas Townsend was only 16 when police found him dead in his children’s home with 42 cans of deodorant spray in the room.
>An inquest found he ‘succumbed to the effects of the gas’ during the unusual accident on August 29 last year.
>His mother Sally told the inquest her son would not take showers and instead spray half a can of deodorant on himself instead. He’d then spray aftershave and would go through a can every week.
>A pathologist told the inquest Thomas had suffered circulation collapse caused by butane gas.

>>53259570
>a yank AND a manlet
He deserved it.

>>53259570
how manlet, what height

doing a look for book in a library for a small gnome man

>>53259541

nothing better than country music about a man with a guilty conscience

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8CzFVm1Yio

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>not being a 10/10 american bull smashing aussies on /brit/ late into the night

>>53259680
>>53259711
He was fucking tiny, like remarkably so.

When we parted ways I said "Cheers little man". He got so cut hahaha.

>>53259734
like 5'4? need to know

>>53259625
Got in the car with him today and he smelt like absolute shit, like he hadn't showered in the month

He's been spending thousands of pounds on spread betting, he was on his phone for the whole day I was with him, checking the markets. He's lost a lot of money today. He says he's going to make it back, he's just been unlucky.

Keeps talking about forming his own political party and he's written a manifesto which includes a questionnaire for potential members. Some of the questions are "Do you think the Prime Minister has wet dreams?" and "Do you believe that women use their erotic power to destroy men's lives?".

I'm actually worried for him. He's never been this bad before.

>>53259741
I'm pretty bad at measurements, I guess something like that. He was about a head smaller than me, and I'm average height.

You a manlet?

wish i had a big bushy beard 2bh

/tv/ and /v/ are such dumb fucking boards

>>53259743
Definitely sounds like he's off his rocker.

>>53259647
Aussie born and bred

>>53259743
That does sound pretty mental ngl.

Don't know what you can do though really, I'm sure there's somewhere you can call for advise though m8.

>>53259743
sorry about this lad. Sounds like a shitty one, has he got a diagnosis of anything? if it wouldnt shit him up too much you can probably close his betting accounts if you phone the company

redpill me on liara, lads

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fuck I hate /lat/

>>53259856
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJ

CHICANOOOOOO DE PUTA MIERDA

>>53259782
5'8 kinda small yeah

Should probably go to sleep
Need to be up at 9 and I've gotta drive back to uni which will take 3 hours haha

>>53259809
bottom of the barrel now, /b/ isn't what it used to be, /v/ is arguably the new "entry" point

>>53259743
madman

>>53259874
Don't let it get you down :^)

>>53259906
people are all sorts of heights here in london

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>>53259856
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJJJJJJJJAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJJJJJJAAAAAAAAAAJJJJAAAAAAAA

multo bene

>>53259906
Low blow m8

>>53259926
TSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

redpill me on the moon lads

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>>53259926
>>53259869

>>53259856

I don't even know what they're saying and I hate them worse than any other general.

Just dropping by to agree with you by the way. Hi /brit/.

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>>53259951
hi /cum/guzzler xx

>>53259935
Made up by the Jews to distract us from cultural marxism

All Argentinians should be rangebanned

>>53259967

I don't even use generals tbqh, I usually have them all filtered but not on this computer.

>>53259990
fairy nuff, why hide them? some top tier bants lad

you are my sunshine you make me happy when skies are grey

>>53259974
They were at one point

>>53259973
>tfw everyones staring up at the moon and you slyly install a global finance network

goyim, are you even trying

>>53259990
Fuck off Yank, how boring are you

>>53260004

To make room for threads I'm more interested in. I'm on /int/ for stale memes, not just stale bantz.

>>53260032
Who's fucking idea was it to repeal it

yanks what is this guy talking about

https://www.rt.com/usa/328243-maine-governor-heroin-racial-comments/

Currently under my duvet reading
Comfy desoo

>be Australian
>get flooded

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I know only one language

>>53259947
this took me a while but i am very happy i don't browse that place anymore

it's same level as spanish rap music, i try to understand a tiny portion and not re-use any of it, just as a challenge

>>53260069
bloody racist desu

>>53260161
Are you proud of spawning such retarded nations?

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>>53260149
I know two

free t2

>>53260186
are you proud of spawning no (0, none) nations and being the second most retarded bastard child of the british empire?

>>53260069
>yanksplaining

just realised something
you can't even tell who's mixed race in america

>>53260069
ethnics from the city travel to maine to deal drugs and get druggie sluts pregnant
the guy who wrote that thinks le page is racist because he made the distinction that white girls are getting knocked and not just girls in general.

>>53259570
hahahaha very good lad

my m8 and I almost convinced a yank girl to have a 3some with us while this yank friend of hers was trying to get with her all night hahahahaha

we just didn't have enough room in the cab so we left without her lmao

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Which one are you?

>>53260219
I couldn't give a fuck, to busy enjoying a functional economy and a great quality of life.

Drink the stick, cat.

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Lads

why do blonde haired blue eyed people hate jews?

>>53260204
I'm better at German than French

>>53260276
Haha, cucked both of them

>>53260288
>digging holes in the ground and selling the contents to chinks
>""""""functional""""""" economy

>>53260292
gib pokki

>>53260292
naughty

very naughty

>>53259951
FOY

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>>53260245
>tfw part Irish

>>53260302
do they?

I really really like cocaine

/lat/ is kinda fun desu

>>53260312
hahaha we didn't get with her like you did with your yank tho :^S

>>53260335
i meant black/white mixed race you melt

cec

>>53260317
>selling nothing to no one
>50% unemployment
>an """"""""economy"""""""" at all

Have you ever beat someone up before? I have. It was fun

baka desu senpai

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Introducing

>>53260345
chicanooooo

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@53260382
Yes, but I have to do this

>Have you ever beat someone up before? I have. It was fun

>>53260382
been in a few brawls before

>>53260363
you seem VERY jealous spain's youth are enjoying NEETbux when you have to work through uni because of your shit social security

>>53260382
Once beat a stray dog to death and pretended it was a yank. It was well fun haha.

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>>53260360
literally just as bad

HILO MOGOLICO

>>53260345
(You) overload

>>53260382
yeah

don't really like fighting though.

want to go shitpost on /lat/ but feel an obligation to keep /brit/ alive and keep the yank/aussie ratio down

>>53260437
>>53260443
poor countries
>>53260446
>>53260445
>>53260431
rich countries

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una vela...

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>>53260467
>Canada
>>rich

The Master is the worst film I have watched in 5 years

yo, if dat girl kno where u stay thats poor
some whore bangin on ya door what for

doing a woken up in the middle of the night lads

had a dream that we invaded Argentina and I got a qt Argie gf who turned out to be a spy and stabbed me in the middle of the night

NEVER trust jfs

>>53260532
we know lad
you only say it every thread

gf's son just pked me...

>>53260546
have you watched Kingsman by any chance

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anyone know anything about army structure? this lad (heaps nice guy btw) was a few years above me in school (he must be 23-4 or there abouts now) and he's a lieutenant -- how does that work?

>>53260546
did you get to shag her at least?

>>53259856
COMO EN LA BIBLIA

>>53260564
when you join as an Officer you start as a Lieutenant

The Master is a terrible film, do not watch it

>>53260564
he sucks a good dick desu

>>53260535
>tfw grime will never get better than Boy in da Corner era Dizzee

@53260564
stupid fucking bait get out of my thread

>>53260564
>the Australian """""military"""""

just pked my mums """"""""husband"""""""" kek, he doesnt even know that the child support is paying for all my high level gear

>>53260564
he went through officer schools so iirc you graduate and enter into the hierarchy as a lieutenant

>>53260562
no

>>53260577
yeah we had a kid but she stabbed him and all

>>53260590
>>53260628
ta

>>53260452
19 in 12 minutes, that's probably the best ypm rate I've had

>>53260564
He graduated from officer school and is now a junior officer. You could do the same if you weren't an autistic wasteman.

>>53260608
>Italy
>literally Italy

this thing about dying alone and unloved has got me feeling a bit down lads

>>53260665
>>53260665
>>53260665

>>53260608
>The 6th Division went into action at Bardia on 3 January 1941. Although the fortress was manned by a larger Italian force, the Australian infantry quickly penetrated the defensive lines with the support of British tanks and artillery. The majority of the Italian force surrendered on 5 January and the Australians took 40,000 prisoners.[24]
>The 6th Division followed up this success by assaulting the fortress of Tobruk on 21 January. Tobruk was secured the next day with 25,000 Italian prisoners taken.[25]

>>53260676
FOY

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>I dont have a job

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>>53260697
ANZAC
N
Z
A
C

>>53260649
wish I had gone to the RMC desu
but late now since I'm nearly done Civilian uni and they give you a hard ass time with applying as an officer from the civie world

my idea is enlisting then in a couple years applying for direct entry within the ranks since I'd have a degree anyways.

>>53260697
Tl;dr

I've wanted to jack off all day but my fucking family hasn't left the house all day. They keep walking past my door and popping their heads in to say stupid shit. FUCK.

I think it's time to move out.

Love you lads

No pun intended