>posting in a yank /brit/
You people disgust me edition
omg lads i matched with an azn what do i do
Name me a more based looking river, than the River Thames.
Protip: You cant
Please allow me to apologize on behalf of all Americans for the fact that self-hating American posters pollute your thread daily.
They want to be like you and be one of you, as it is in our culture to stand out and be different from other Americans. It's all they know.
Please do not take their actions as representative of all my people. Thank you. That is all.
The Nile delta is so aesthetically pleasing I've actually wanked to pictures of it before
Daily reminder this slut claimed she had self-esteem issues with her appearance. Normies will say anything for sympathy.
>tfw I can't adopt all of these cats
i was thinking of saying "Hi, you like house and techno. I like house and techno too. We have so much in common. Let's go for a drink", DO YOU THINK IT WILL WORK!? HUH? HUH?!?! LOL!!!
i'm joking i wouldnt say that lol
i was thinking of saying, "omg an azn"
>no poortheners can post because they're all banned for flooding
>you now remember when the Thames was light blue back in the 1990s
The sizes of beer in mainland Europe are stupid.
What's the point?
>be complete nobody for 30 years
>get nominated as a joke
>suddenly leader of the opposition
Every second there aren't camers on him he must be cacking his pants wondering how the hell this happened.
anyone ever imagined her naked and putting ur dick inside her and shes alL ":O AAAOOOHH, AHHH, AHHH!! AHHH!" and u ramming ur penis in her vagina like "NNGH NNGH NNGH NNGH" and shes all like "YEAH FUCK ME!! FUCK ME!! OH GOD!!!"
thanks for saying what we were all thinking lad
river Nile is huge, but it's shape is pretty bland
>looks like diarrhoea coming out of my arse, from an indian drinking binge the night before
at least the thames looks like a snake
A couple of dip dabs, a sherbet fountain, a quarter of west Indian limes and a copy of the Beano please.
Why does James Deen always ram benis in vagina like a little jewish boy
>A couple of dip dabs, a sherbet fountain, a quarter of west Indian limes and a copy of the Beano please.
Dunno if I've been as such but driven through it millions of times.
MK is an arsehole desu senpai, cycled to Wolverton the other day and had to go through all the shitty housing estates.
>talking to a customer service woman from BT
>my last words before hanging up were "Take care"
is this inappropriate? it feels wrong, I wish I could go back and do it again
>rolling tobacco (with rizla included, £4)
>two 2litire bottles of white cider (would be £6 combined)
>two packets of super noodles (they're 70p each)
>walkers multi pack (£1.20)
>bombay mix (£1)
Also, can you get hold of Charlie, please? I want two scores worth of weed, thanks!
Also, pic related!
This is what's saving Britain from refugees.
reminder that this is the cunt that spends over an hour making vocaroos by putting on one of the shittest attempts at a an irish accent ive ever heard an american do
most embarrassing poster currently on /int/ by a country mile, absolutely hate the cunt
fucking hell where do you live? I'm literally in Wolverton every weekend picking up a takeaway or doing the big shop
and yeah there is some fucking shithole estates round there, Greenleys or whatever they call it now being the worst
mate it's called trying to be a decent human being, i mean most people aren't gonna be attracted to her cause of her disfigurement (including me). she's lucky this gary bloke wants to shag her
Reminder that the Argies started a war over the Falklands and were forced to surrender after 74 (seventy four) days (how long it takes for the earth to complete one rotation) in the face of superior British military force
How do you stop your room smelling of cum when you have a wank at night in bed before going to sleep?
I spaff onto toilet paper, roll it up but there's still a lingering, pungent cum odour that permeates the air through the night. It's not like I can get up, go to the toilet, flush and walk right back to my room. My mum will know I'm flushing spermy tissues.
do you lads pay for internet on your phone? i used to but dont see the point as i have internet at home, work and all shops auto connect me to "the cloud" these days but would like opinions
A village nearby desu, don't really want to say since it's small.
Hodge Lea is the dodgiest place I know in that area and I had to cycle through that, literally just went sanic mode past a pack of plebs.
>tfw used to have a mate who lived in the Lakes Estate
Feared for my life the few times I went to his.
i don't really believe or trust anyone in the porn industry - it's a shady business. i will say i laugh at all the james deen fans and feminist who said he was "the nice guy" of porn
>omg he's so sweet and lovely such a nice looking guy
every scene i see is him jamming his cock in someones mouth slapping them and treating them like dogshit - he obviously has narcissistic power fantasies
inb4 "that's how women like to be treated"
Yes, only £15pcm for unlimited (3g though). Is v. handy when you want to use it for maps, whatsapp or uber etc. whilst out and about. Also bbc radio app whilst walking to work ahah!
Also have used it for days on end tethered to my laptop whilst having broadband issues.
Couldn't do without it personally.
>i don't really believe or trust anyone in the porn industry - it's a shady business
Reminder that Zanzibar declared war on the British Empire and was forced to surrender after thirty-eight minutes
Look at all these (You)s I got from this post lads.
>OI YA WANKA! Gimme a fiver or I swear on me nan's life I'll get me droogies and shank you be' 'ind Asda!
What do /brit/?
yeah if you want to get one-night stands with damaged goods the whole negging thing is fine but you want a wifeable gf then you have to be a normal person
saying that most of deens fans were probably also damaged goods
sayin that some girls like it rough some dont but thats a bedroom thing init
ive slept with girls who wouldnt even give me a blowjob and some who would let me facefuck them and choke them. funny that huh
i'm going to one of the quarter finals, the 4th i think.
>tfw it might be based wales beating france
When I was 12 I thought I was really funny scaring people. I used to hide behind stuff in our garage and jump out to scare my dad when he got home from work. My elder sisters room had an attic access in it that I got in and dropped into her room from when she had her friends round.
Anyway one day I was staying with my grandmother and tried it on her. I hid behind the fridge in her kitchen and when she came in I jumped out. She had a heart attack and collapsed. I called the ambulance and when they arrived I said I just found her like that. She died on the way to hospital. Ive never told anyone what happened but I think my family suspected my involvement for a bit, they probably just didn't want to consider the possibility their son murdered his 87 year old grandmother.
Apart from that my life has gone swimmingly.
on my wAAAaaaAay to see my friends
who lived a couple blocks away from me (aaaaaaaaaa)
as I waaAAaAAaaaalked through the subway
must've been about quarter past 3
in front of meEEeee
stood a beautiful honey with a beautiful body
she asked me for the time
I said "itdcostherhernamesixdigitnumberandadatewithmetomorroweatnine"
>us britcucks wouldn't let in a mexican girl
Dirty old river, must you keep rolling, flowing into the night
People so smelly, make me feel dizzy, tuk-tuk lights shine so bright
But I don't, need a loo
As long as I shit on Waterpoo Sunset, I am in paradise
Every day I look at the line for the toilets
But chilly, chilly is evening time, Waterloo sunset's fine.
Sanjeep meets Nina, Waterpoo toilets, every Friday night
But I am so lazy, don't want to wander, I poo on street at night
But I don't, need a loo
As long as I shit on Waterpoo Sunset, I am in paradise
Every day I look at the line for the toilets
But chilly, chilly is evening time, Waterpoo sunset's fine.
Millions of people swarming like flies 'round Waterpoo shitting street
But Sanjeep and Nina cross over the river where they feel safe and clean
And they don't, need no toilets
As long as they shit on Waterpoo Sunset, they are in paradise
Waterpoo sunset's fine.
No I just had a few beers and felt like confessing to some things.
Every time I hear someone say "oh I was such a bad kid" I think how they would react if they knew that about me.
2009: me and the gf since year 7 took eachothers virginities
2010: shagged this year
2011: shagged multiple this year
2012: shagged multiple this year
2013: didn't shag this year
2014: shagged only once this year
2015: shagged a few escorts, 0 proper shags
2016: fuck knows
not going very well tbqh with you
Just do bedroom stuff; that's what I do. Sure you can't get anywhere near as big as people doing compound lifts at the gym but you can still make noticeable gains.
I do pullups (pic related), goblet squats, and chest press type things.
>So anon we heard you are a sissy brit boy, is this true?
Unironically sort of have a crush on Felicia Day. Worried this might hurt my 4chan street cred.
wageslavery really does act as a good distraction from my miserable existence 2bh
it's good to be doing something with my time other than sitting inside all day thinking about how much i hate myself
probably for the best, stony's gone to the dogs, bet you've got a cosy village pub anyway
well it's nice to know there's another one of us out there, I look forward to the inevitable Milton Keynes meetup
That's because there's a greater threat, my lads
>What happens on the right-wing platforms and in chatrooms is at least as awful as the acts of those assaulting the women," he said. "This is poisoning the climate of our society."
Changes in the populations of ethnic groups in London between 2001-2011
White British - declined by 619,000
Asian: - increased by 564,000
Black - increased by 306,000
Mixed - increased by 179,000
Other - increased b 168,000
white brits are being ethnically cleansed
2006: be unpopular due to my racism
2007: become popular edgy fag
2008: become edgy popular fag who girls like
2008: become very popular at school (still can't get girls because I 'can't take it to the next level')
2008: I still have not lost virginity
2010: become a degenerate introverted druggie, thanks to weed
2013: quit my addiction of weed, meth and alcohol
2014: gain confidence
2014: lose my virginity to chav girl (who loves getting raped while she's pegged)
2015: fuck hot tennis girl
2015: fuck other middle class girls
2015: fucking women left, right and centre
2015: women love my confidence
late 2015: be in a relationship with a 8/10 girl.
2014: me and much younger gf took each others virginities and had sex a bunch of times (gonna count this as not missing out on teen sex)
early 2015: shagged her a few times again
late 2015: shagged her a few times again
future: no prospects at all 2bh
it's all over for me lads
I'm 6'2", ~10 stone 10 usually. Admittedly I am a skelly but I think I look OK with my pullups and squats and stuff. I eat 3 square meals a day + snacks + teas, coffees etc.
If that ectomorph, mesomorph, endomorph shite is real then I'm definitely an ectomorph.
Stony is comfy though, love the highstreet. Used to get my hair cut at the One Salon for a ridiculous amount of money lel. Used to go to the Indian there, dunnno if it exists any more, bakash I think? Also had a childhood friend who used to live there.
Feels a bit like home to me desu.
>2006: be unpopular due to my racism
>2007: become popular edgy fag
>2008: become edgy popular fag who girls like
>2008: become very popular at school (still can't get girls because I 'can't take it to the next level')
>2008: I still have not lost virginity
>2010: become a degenerate introverted druggie, thanks to weed
>2013: quit my addiction of weed, meth and alcohol
>2014: gain confidence
>2014: lose my virginity to chav girl (who loves getting raped while she's pegged)
>2015: fuck hot tennis girl
>2015: fuck other middle class girls
>2015: fucking women left, right and centre
>2015: women love my confidence
>late 2015: be in a relationship with a 8/10 girl.
>Don't care about money or shit even though I came from a wealthy family
>Just want a nice gf and some friends
>2016: on paper doing well
>23 years old and earning £35k a year and £10k saved up
>tfw no gf
>tfw a few """"friends"""" but no real friends
>tfw would trade it all for a nice gf
>girl at work greets me with "wooow, you look so much younger without your glasses! I barely recognised you!"
>says I look like I'm under thirty again
>mfw I'm 26
it used to be comfy but on friday and saturday nights it actually gets really nasty now, and it's got very chavvy
bekash is good, but moghal palace was the GOAT indian in stony tbf.
2009: Leave school after GCSEs, go to college to do A levels
2010: Leave college do apprenticeship
2011: Leave apprenticeship and look for a job
2013: Think this was when I went to college to do engineering but had to drop out due to anxiety issues which I didn't know about at the time.
2014: Diagnosed with agoraphobia and shit, never leave the house.
2015: Dad dies at the start of the year. Kick up the arse with the agoraphobia and start getting out more a bit.
2016: Not done a lot so far.
Wish I could turn back time.
You're on the Northern Line coming up to kentish town and this guy slaps your gf's arse. What do you do?
Is that the one in the old Church? I went there once and wasn't a fan desu, shit atmosphere.
Went to the Chinese across the road once too and it was good.
Heard good things about the Malaysian restaurant in Stony too, haven't been though.
>due to anxiety issues which I didn't know about at the time.
? ? ?
Normal rectangular top-rim glasses tbqh.
I've always looked old in general though. I've bought alcohol with no problem since age 15 and when I started uni my coursemates thought I was in my mid twenties.
Well I started feeling fucking panicky in class and just generally shitty but didn't know why sort of thing desu.
Do you reckon the guy asked before or just took it?
Honestly, I've forgotten just how memetic Miliband was
All the gym lads I know feel like shit if they don't go, put off other things because of gym routines, etc. You definitely become addicted to that endorphin release and shit
Although probably better spent than on fuckin /brit/ so could be worse