I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AGM-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding
Kind of hard to miss something of that size.
Jews versus Muslims? This could get explosive.
>The mayor of Cologne has summoned police for crisis talks after about 80 women reported sexual assaults and muggings by men on New Year's Eve.
>The scale of the attacks on women at the city's central railway station has shocked Germany. About 1,000 drunk and aggressive young men were involved.
>City police chief Wolfgang Albers called it "a completely new dimension of crime". The men were of Arab or North African appearance, he said.
Do most British people count Australians as foreigners? It seems that most people here think of Australia as just a warm England, a home away from home and almost everybody has a relative that lives in Australia too.
>hey i know, let's promote peace, love and tolerance by importing millions of poor uneducated people from ultra-religious, ultra-conservative, ultra-intolerant and quasi-fascist countries.
Why do yanks post here, seriously? They have their own general where people actually want to read what they're saying. They stick out like a paki in Iceland in /brit/, they just don't get us. Why don't they talk about tailgating in /cum/ or something?
K A R E N
What book should I read lads?
Not read a book in years 2bh
They're JF as fuck
They play different sports
Watch different tv
Literally have as much in common with us as fucking Canada or something
hey guys does this upset you
>"The British people invaded and oppressed the poor Indians"
Is there any bigger signs of an idiot than this?
>A policeman who was outside Cologne station during the New Year's Eve trouble told the city's Express news website that he had detained eight suspects. "They were all asylum seekers, carrying copies of their residence certificates," he said.
>Commentators in Germany were quick to urge people not to jump to conclusions.
They're pushing the German people too far. Don't they know what happens when Germans get pushed too far?
I went to sleep around 4am but woke up suddenly when it was still dark, and I had a sensation inside my brain, it felt like my pineal gland was throbbing, and I had a vision of a demonic being looking through a half closed eyelid, as if representing my 3rd eye being partially open. Even when I woke up properly I still had the weird feeling in the middle of my brain.
They play rugby and cricket. They're one of the only few countries that can banter. Americans sometimes have a hard time telling Australians and British people apart from accent alone. They only look different because they're cooked by the sun constantly.
We're definitely culturally closer to Australia than any other country apart from Ireland which is basically just a cultural clone of Britain at this point
Do you know how much trouble the British went to to make sure that all their governance complied with Indian culture and Hindu laws in Hindu areas and Muslim law in Muslim areas?
Poleaboo can confirm that wageslavery is better than NEETdom
The greatest period of his life was the July when he was working like a dog in the amusement park, it gave him purpose, a reason to get out of bed every morning, saw various people every day, some old faces, some new but best of all he got to see people smile at him and thank him
Someone who is smiled at and thanked, can't be worthless, can they?
Yeah really following Hindu culture here
Blowing from a gun as a method of execution was used, perhaps most well known, by British troops during the Indian Rebellion of 1857. The British, however, had a long tradition prior to the 1857 rebellion of executing sepoys found guilty of mutiny or desertion in this manner. According to one historian, the British tradition began in 1760, when the government examined the modes of capital punishment in use. In the district of the 24 Perganas, it was found that the common military mode of capital punishment was flogging to death. Regarding blowing from a gun as an old Mogul punishment, the government opted for this technique, as being, relative to death by flogging, more deterrent, more public and more humane.
The British adopted blowing from a gun as a method of execution because it was Indian culture.
yeh its pretty nice. glad i was raised there.
btw, we eat scones the right way. don't listen to anything a Cornish nig has to say. They're all toothless idiot manure-fetishists.
>be a poor carpenter in backwoods judea
>become a preacher, start a non-violent cult
>get executed before the age of 40
>your cult takes over a huge empire and accompanies its civilisation to world domination
Isn't this an even more impressive feat if Jesus was just a mortal man?
>cousin comes up from london for the weekend
>take him down to the pub with the lads
>he gets bantered a bit, but the lads lay off as they don't know him
>drags me aside to tell me how they're hurting his feelings and wants me to warn them
>tell him to get lost
>the night ends in tears when one of the lads is savage af and he runs out in tears
>packs his things and gets on the first train the next morning
I couldn't sleep because of his sobbing, why can't southern fairies handle the bantz lads
imagine your oneitis started seeing a non-white gentlemen? can't imagine much worse
>Meet brother's fiancé's Northern family
>Single, alcoholic mother
>Unemployed loser brother
>Single mother cousin with a black baby
>Later on, cousin is naturally drunk and telling me about all her problems
>"I don't know why but I always go for the bad guys"
>Without thinking, nod at her baby and say "well clearly."
>She didn't notice
When it comes to posting outside of this shitty general, do any of the following thoughts cross your minds?
>Haha banter xD
>Time to reference the Empire
>Do I sound like an obnoxious, ignorant cunt?
>Wait what am I doing shitposting outside of /shit/?
Why is it I never see a brit posting in 9 out of 10 threads but when I do, most of the time he is saying something retarded?
Just a heart to heart guys..
>Start a sandnigger cult to fuck 9 year olds
>Be a warlord
>Write down your warlord ways
>1400 years later islam is still violent
Really don't get people aren't surprised a warlord religion is violent
oh forgot that this was Katie Hopkins desu
do people actually enjoy the presence of mudslimes in this country? What actual tangible benefits do they bring apart from more people to tax?
All i've noticed in an increase in terror offences, more racial tension and the dissolution of personal freedoms.
why are they here? why?
gosh i love katie lads
>start jew cult to get cuckolded
>be a cuckold
>write down your cuckold ways
>2000 years later christianity is still cuckolded
really don't get why people are suprised christians are up against a wall with muslim dick in their butts
This individual is becoming increasingly problematic.
>mfw I don't have lads to talk with about weekend's football games on Monday
Life is suffering
does it disgust anybody else that poleaboo, given his extensive history of being scum, attends /brit/ regularly and considers himself one of us? wish we could collaboratively get him v& desu
Every civilised nation in the world is gradually shifting towards a more liberal drug policy. Except for us, we're enacting a law so broad it had to specify that food was not included. Even Ireland is about to copy the Portugal model.
Why didn't the media show these syrians filling sandbags to stop floodwater?
(Pictured obtained from online media outlet)
>no one at home
>go into the shower
>tell yourself you dont like who you are
think kev will do the same and become an Alpha
>Is "Danczuk" a Polish name?
Yes and no.
Once they drop Polish diacritics and stop applying genders to their last names (Lisicki is a man, Lisicka is a woman) they're yours for good.
This Koush would say something different if it were a Native American tribe, rather than a bunch of right-wing militias, that are holding the federal government building in Oregon hostage while demanding the feds leave the land in their rightful hands.
>go to my grandmas house
>try to discuss emerging markets and the effect of iran's sanctions being lifted will have on the economy
>she tells me she doesn't want to talk about such things
what the fuck /brit/? where can i find other intellectual Financial Times reading types like myself?
isn't people already a plural?
how can you pluralise a plural?
>tell my mates about how i talk to /brit/ about real life advice
>they all talk shit on you
>"why would you accept advice from people on 4chan hahaha they're all freaks"
defended you lads tBh told them that you're all just normal people who need to outlet your frustrations on thought onto a place you're comfortable with
http://www.brendanfraser.com/ even his website is [view attatchment]
>anon why arent you drinking?
lack of slags (apart from Rina ofc) is a tad disappointing giving the rep of the fine general
why has he been suspended? he's done nothing wrong
>im at home and downloading the cinematic gift that is "crazy, stupid love"
fun fact, these two are now a lesbian couple
yes that is me but im talking about a different bird im gonna message priscilla again tonight (since it's TECHNICALLY 1:08am) with the following
>did you ever end up listening to *song i recommended her* senpai?
>*song i recommended her link*
Waiting for Modern Family to start so i can have a wank x