/brit/

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crayon pop

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AGM-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding

hi

janny's gonna do his NUT

poo

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kpop desu lads

yanks should be seen and not heard

The comments are going by so quickly nobody will even see this!
I have a small penis xD

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omo

american here

>>53125997
why isn't he in a wheel chair?

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>>53126090

stop making new threads on page 4 for fuck's sake

i hate you

>tfw you make a cracking post that's bound to be (You)'s galore, but then someone links a new thread so no one reads it

Everytime.

>>53126138

more like americant

>>53126152
Good question

>>53126130
slopes dying their hair to make themselves look white from a distance should be illegal

it's cultural appropriation

Americans should be heard and not seen.

>>53126170
not really

>>53126184
Jesus Christ
He literally looks exactly like me except I'm pale as fuck and probably older

>>53126162
janny shill fuck off

>53126166
Just looked and none of those posts look (You) worthy, neither is this post.

Eating sensations and a cheese and beetroot sandwich

got an old tub of dry roasted peanuts from christmas for lunch lads

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>>53126197
Kind of hard to miss something of that size.

foreigners should be neither seen nor heard

business idea: start a conspiracy theory about australians not actually being the descendants of convicts but actually being descendants of aliens, hence the "alian" in "australian"

>middle-aged women talking about their """""fitness""""" regimes
Fuck sake

>Zac Goldsmith has accused his Labour rival to be London mayor Sadiq Khan of "playing the race card".

oh dear zac what are you doing mate

Britons should be seen and heard.

>>53126241
good point
FOJF

>Karen Danszuck on loose women

HNNNNG

>lactose intolerant
>fructose intolerant
>coeliac disease
>nut allergy

JUST

I complimented a tinder match and she just said thanks

What can say now that isn't boring?

Americans should be seen and heard

>>53126241
FOY

>foreigner banter
Heh, funny how you all grovel at my feet irl

>>53126282
lol nerd

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>>53126261
Jews versus Muslims? This could get explosive.

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>The mayor of Cologne has summoned police for crisis talks after about 80 women reported sexual assaults and muggings by men on New Year's Eve.
>The scale of the attacks on women at the city's central railway station has shocked Germany. About 1,000 drunk and aggressive young men were involved.
>City police chief Wolfgang Albers called it "a completely new dimension of crime". The men were of Arab or North African appearance, he said.

>>53126241
agreed. fuck off yank.

>>53126279
wew pics

>>53126286
How am I meant to reply to that your banter is deadly

Do most British people count Australians as foreigners? It seems that most people here think of Australia as just a warm England, a home away from home and almost everybody has a relative that lives in Australia too.

>>53126261
Can't believe anyone would vote for Zac Goldsmith

Literally a billionaire jew

>>53126310
pretty sure you're the foreigner here

>>53126308
delete this you fucking racist, muslims have great respect for women

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrJ9jGAHspw

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>>53126308

>hey i know, let's promote peace, love and tolerance by importing millions of poor uneducated people from ultra-religious, ultra-conservative, ultra-intolerant and quasi-fascist countries.

Why do yanks post here, seriously? They have their own general where people actually want to read what they're saying. They stick out like a paki in Iceland in /brit/, they just don't get us. Why don't they talk about tailgating in /cum/ or something?

eccie lads

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>>53126279
>>53126326
K A R E N
A
R
E
N

>I like beer. And a good night.
does this mean she wants to fuck

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What is England like, lads?

>>53126261
That's why I'm voting Peter Whittle

>>53126326
Just turn on itv

>>53126308

how will lefties defend this?

levis 510s starting to feel a bit tight at the waist

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What book should I read lads?

Not read a book in years 2bh

>>53126370
She just looks like a typical slag though?

>>53126396
fatty bom bom

>>53126377
Grey, damp and expensive

>>53126335
They're JF as fuck

They play different sports
Act differently
Look different
Sound different
Watch different tv

Literally have as much in common with us as fucking Canada or something

>>53126409
the bible you gay weeb twat, sort your fucking life out

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hey guys does this upset you

>>53126394
They censored it for 5 days until the news couldn't ignore german social media anymore, reddit is deleting all posts about it haha

>>53126335
>tfw 1 in 3 people in my city are British born.

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>"The British people invaded and oppressed the poor Indians"

Is there any bigger signs of an idiot than this?

https://twitter.com/KarenDanczuk

>>53126451
>implying the hindus didn't love being oppressed by the muslims

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>A policeman who was outside Cologne station during the New Year's Eve trouble told the city's Express news website that he had detained eight suspects. "They were all asylum seekers, carrying copies of their residence certificates," he said.
>Commentators in Germany were quick to urge people not to jump to conclusions.

They're pushing the German people too far. Don't they know what happens when Germans get pushed too far?

I went to sleep around 4am but woke up suddenly when it was still dark, and I had a sensation inside my brain, it felt like my pineal gland was throbbing, and I had a vision of a demonic being looking through a half closed eyelid, as if representing my 3rd eye being partially open. Even when I woke up properly I still had the weird feeling in the middle of my brain.

redpill me on devon, lads

>>53126451
But its true

>>53126461
>those chebs
wew

>>53126417
>>53126417
They play rugby and cricket. They're one of the only few countries that can banter. Americans sometimes have a hard time telling Australians and British people apart from accent alone. They only look different because they're cooked by the sun constantly.

We're definitely culturally closer to Australia than any other country apart from Ireland which is basically just a cultural clone of Britain at this point

>>53126451
Yeah, we sure treated them superbly!

>>53126461
she's ugly

>>53126489
Found the idiot.

unironically would shag ruth langsford ffs what am i like haha x

>>53126489
Do you know how much trouble the British went to to make sure that all their governance complied with Indian culture and Hindu laws in Hindu areas and Muslim law in Muslim areas?

>>53126481
Unfortunately the German people are mostly old as fuck because they stopped having children

>>53126485
they eat scones incorrectly

>>53126541
Oh, is gunning down women & children complying with Indian culture?

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>>53126485

its lovely

>>53126485
It's idyllic, but there are few jobs outside the service industry.

Poleaboo can confirm that wageslavery is better than NEETdom

The greatest period of his life was the July when he was working like a dog in the amusement park, it gave him purpose, a reason to get out of bed every morning, saw various people every day, some old faces, some new but best of all he got to see people smile at him and thank him

Someone who is smiled at and thanked, can't be worthless, can they?

>>53126569
The Islamic parts, yes.

>>53126569
yes

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>>53126541
Yeah really following Hindu culture here

>>53126569
Alri Rasheed?

>>53126577
What does poleaboo like to spend his money on?

Quite frankly I feel that if you're not very good at war then you deserve to be colonised.

>>53126594
Blowing from a gun as a method of execution was used, perhaps most well known, by British troops during the Indian Rebellion of 1857. The British, however, had a long tradition prior to the 1857 rebellion of executing sepoys found guilty of mutiny or desertion in this manner. According to one historian, the British tradition began in 1760, when the government examined the modes of capital punishment in use. In the district of the 24 Perganas, it was found that the common military mode of capital punishment was flogging to death. Regarding blowing from a gun as an old Mogul punishment, the government opted for this technique, as being, relative to death by flogging, more deterrent, more public and more humane.

fuck everybody in this thread

>>53126598
>India
>Rasheed

Not very bright are you rorke?

>>53126638
How good are you at war mate? Not very good? Then you deserve to have me come and live in your front room and fuck your mum.

>>53126561
How do you manage that?

>>53126571
>>53126573
I wish I could move away from the city to a place like that.

>>53126649
Cry me a river Prajeet

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>>53126594
The British adopted blowing from a gun as a method of execution because it was Indian culture.

>>53126675
by putting the cream on the scone before the jam.

>>53126654
yes please x

>>53126638
Oh so people deserve to die because they're not violent thugs?

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>>53126649
>>53126694

>>53126668
I'm excellent at war m8, come round and I'll fuckin merc ya

>>53126632
Nothing really
He'll buy vidya but he'll always try and sell his games on for a profit/break-even

Take-aways I suppose are his largest and most common expense

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>>53126675

yeh its pretty nice. glad i was raised there.

btw, we eat scones the right way. don't listen to anything a Cornish nig has to say. They're all toothless idiot manure-fetishists.

>>53126685
>Missing the point of my post

>>53126710
>tfw I've always done it that way

Doing a poo at work lads

>>53126722
What take-aways does he like?

>>53126739
madman

>>53126739
A B S O L U T E
B
S
O
L
U
T
E

would you rather be shot and killed or live in India?

>>53126694
Yep killing innocent civilians
That's what the Hindus wanted

>>53126723
not even cornish Tbh, just have always eaten it that way, makes more logical sense

>>53126730
infidel

So cringeworthy when faggots on here can never admit Britain has ever done anything wrong to anyone ever.

the right wing idealizes energy, activity, power and strength, rather than self-victimization, defeatism and weakness like the left.

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Men on the right

>>53126786
But they weren't innocent? What part of capital punishment don't you understand?

>>53126792
Rasheed.

>>53126713
They're the ones who are the violent thugs, which is why they failed to develop decent weaponry. We did them a favour desu.

>>53126792
So cringeworthy when self hating faggots on here can never admit Britain is the greatest country the world has ever seen

just got an email from the cops saying they're going to investigate ribena's posts by asking 4chan for his IP lol. basically, if his posts match the IP of his home address he's fucked.

>>53126806
Funny, in the thumbnail I thought it said Rasheed to A&E

>>53126752
Chicken tikka (or kobedi or seekh kebab or chicken donner) on naan

>>53126786
They were literally guilty of killing British solider and Administration staff

>be a poor carpenter in backwoods judea
>become a preacher, start a non-violent cult
>get executed before the age of 40
>your cult takes over a huge empire and accompanies its civilisation to world domination

Isn't this an even more impressive feat if Jesus was just a mortal man?

>>53126824
Yep all those innocent civilians just going about their life totally deserved to be invaded by Britain and slaughtered

>>53126685
Not an argument

>>53126823
Wouldn't mind (You) from the Queen of the selfie

>>53126849
Big fan of paneer chilli masala myself 2bh

>>53126874
I'm not the arguementative type

>>53126834
Solid argumentative skills

Admitting wrongdoings =/= self hatred you deluded, blindly patriotic retard.

Teen sexted by Simon Danczuk was dominatrix who sold toenail clippings for £10

>responding to shit-tier bait

banter, lad

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>>53126972
on topic of this subject

>cousin comes up from london for the weekend
>take him down to the pub with the lads
>he gets bantered a bit, but the lads lay off as they don't know him
>drags me aside to tell me how they're hurting his feelings and wants me to warn them
>tell him to get lost
>the night ends in tears when one of the lads is savage af and he runs out in tears
>packs his things and gets on the first train the next morning

I couldn't sleep because of his sobbing, why can't southern fairies handle the bantz lads

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imagine your oneitis started seeing a non-white gentlemen? can't imagine much worse

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>>53126935
being your birthday and all

>>53126982
She isn't even good looking

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Me on the right

>Meet brother's fiancé's Northern family
>Single, alcoholic mother
>Unemployed loser brother
>Single mother cousin with a black baby
>Later on, cousin is naturally drunk and telling me about all her problems
>"I don't know why but I always go for the bad guys"
>Without thinking, nod at her baby and say "well clearly."
>She didn't notice

>>53127011
this tbf

When it comes to posting outside of this shitty general, do any of the following thoughts cross your minds?

>Haha banter xD
>Time to reference the Empire
>Do I sound like an obnoxious, ignorant cunt?
>Wait what am I doing shitposting outside of /shit/?

Why is it I never see a brit posting in 9 out of 10 threads but when I do, most of the time he is saying something retarded?

Just a heart to heart guys..

>>53126994
what bants in particular occurred on that day?

>>53126993
The ISIS supporter Poleaboo encountered at the barbers hated Simon Danzcuk though

He even knew he was in big trouble

>>53127035
Rasheed

>>53126863
>Be sandnigger
>Start a sandnigger cult to fuck 9 year olds
>Be a warlord
>Write down your warlord ways
>1400 years later islam is still violent

Really don't get people aren't surprised a warlord religion is violent

To look down on the ordinary is to despise what you can't have. Show me a man who fears being ordinary, and I'll show you a man who is not yet a man.

>>53127043
>The ISIS supporter Poleaboo
Confirmed, get 'im detective

>>53126993
don't get this tyler meme? is that his son? or something

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>>53127086
delete this you fucking normie

>I use divide and conquer tactics to make white brits argue over meaningless politics or what is art instead of uniting to rid Britain of the muslim menace

Rasheed

>>53127086
>Show me a man who fears being ordinary
95% of brit

>>53127072
Edgy

>>53127112
she doesn't like the name tyler because it sounds working class apparently

>>53127140
t. rasheed

>>53127140
Alri muhammed

You better shape up, cause I need a gf
and my heart is set on (You)

>>53127112
katie hopkins went on this morning once and said she made efforts to stop her kids mixing with common sounding names like tyler, brandon etc and fat kids

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>>53127148
oh forgot that this was Katie Hopkins desu

firefox won't let me post any more, says a bunch of sites use untrusted connections
don't like using chromium for fuck's saaaaaaaaake

>>53127167
:D

do people actually enjoy the presence of mudslimes in this country? What actual tangible benefits do they bring apart from more people to tax?
All i've noticed in an increase in terror offences, more racial tension and the dissolution of personal freedoms.
why are they here? why?

>>53127112
>tyler
Its a nigger name.

sorry, I don't like women (I'm not gay I just don't like women)

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BANTS

gosh i love katie lads

>>53127217
oh and a massive increase in sex offences.

we even have a sex pest mudshit in this very thread.

im so glad these people are here. how lovely for us.

>>53127072
>be jew
>start jew cult to get cuckolded
>be a cuckold
>write down your cuckold ways
>2000 years later christianity is still cuckolded

really don't get why people are suprised christians are up against a wall with muslim dick in their butts

>>53127217
Edgy

>>53127217
>>53127265
Rorke

>>53127252
Yeah well her daughter is called India

>>53127265
>oh and a massive increase in sex offences.
Pakis are only 3 times more likely to be in prison, silly edgelord

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>>53127252
hmm true

>>53127292

>apologising for rape and terrorism

edgy

>>53127268
>>53127292
>>53127302
Rasheed

>>53127292
>>53127302

being pro-mudslime is the edgiest.

go away edgelords.

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>>53127258
This individual is becoming increasingly problematic.

does ribena's family know he was kicked out of uni for filming girls doing a shit?

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>>53127343
>>53127354

>>53127348
>>53127354
literally all me

>>53127217
Anyone care to provide a reasonable answer to this?

>>53127383
Never got charged with that and the investigation has been dropped so it's a moot point

Oh
My
God
You look just like shakira

>>53127454
Does anyone enjoy your presence in this country or even in this thread?

>>53127490
No wait, you're catherine zeta

>>53127490
FOY

*Hits the quam*

>>53127499
calm yourself rasheed

>like garlic bread
>don't like garlic sauce

explain

>>53127217
They do your job better than you do and for less. That's why they're here. Now shut up Rorke.

>>53127508
Rasheed.

>>53127508
You are a literal, actual Muslim. Nobody else likes Muslims.

morning lads, had a bit of a lie in

>>53127456
read his post again you idiot.

>>53127508
Please tell me you're not serious

Loving how literally no one can answer that lad's legit question seriously aside from gay meme answers.
Guess that's an answer in itself really.

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>>53127490
SLAG I TELL YOU

SLAG

Lots of turbo Rasheeds today

>>53127570
Didn't get expelled from uni though, still only suspended

>>53127609
Fuck off lewdposter
She is a cute lady

>>53127508
T A K B I R
A
K
B
I
R

Why don't we start judging individuals by their actions not the group they associate with?

>>53127615
Me in the centre left.

>>53127615
Couple of """"honest"""" pakis doesn't really address the issue though?

>>53127616
na it's just the one

>>53127615

Bet that were all muslim

>>53127508
>>53127615
Good posts

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>>53127647
S L A G K I

You're vulnerable
So vulnerable
You are not a robot

>>53127649
Because choosing to associate with a shitty group is a shitty action

Rorkes on the rampage today

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>mfw I don't have lads to talk with about weekend's football games on Monday

Life is suffering

What would you rather?

Be fed by some Muslims or get raped and molested?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-35231046

>>53127615
having to explicitly show a few muslims doing simple basic acts of compassion just proves how shit they truly are in general.

got heart palpitations

>>53127710
Nah, it's just one mad autist

>>53127675
>bullying the only worthwhile yank in /brit/
pack it in. she's welsh/greek fyi.

>Confirmed now: missing Hong Kong bookseller Lee Bo is a British citizen

Fucking hell lads

>>53127738
down a can of monster lad

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>>53127717

Less rasheed
More lewd marina please

>>53127644
you were still kicked out, regardless of if its permanent or not.

your family must hate you 2bh.

>>53127765
Aren't you that Junfag?

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>>53127754
>She is Greek
Yes, a paki.

Can a Catholic ever be a real Brit?

>>53127765
It's not him lad

want to wank but i'm expecting a phone call

>>53127812
ring ring
banana phone

>>53126994
things that never happened

Imagine a world without islam

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does it disgust anybody else that poleaboo, given his extensive history of being scum, attends /brit/ regularly and considers himself one of us? wish we could collaboratively get him v& desu

>Muslim acts like a normal human being and not a sex obsessed animal
WHY WON'T THE MEDIA SHOW THIS?

>>53127474
>>53127474
>>53127474

pls post

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>>53127754
>she's welsh

Exactly

>>53127830
I can't imagine a world without the uk tbqh

Every civilised nation in the world is gradually shifting towards a more liberal drug policy. Except for us, we're enacting a law so broad it had to specify that food was not included. Even Ireland is about to copy the Portugal model.

>>53127862
>>53127801
delete this

would support a crusade in europe tbf (to be frank) lads

>>53127851
foy

halal slaughter should be banned

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Why didn't the media show these syrians filling sandbags to stop floodwater?

(Pictured obtained from online media outlet)

>>53127910
You have my sword, lad.

>>53127941
typicalnorthern.jpg

>>53127941
because no one cares about a few shit-tier humans doing basic acts of compassion that anyone else would do.

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post your pakifu <3

>>53127941
Shame they can't stop that flood of immigrants haha

Is "Danczuk" a Polish name?

>>53127941
They go at it form building trenches when they were in Isis

>>53127910
A crusade against Radical Islam? Well then brother, the good Muslims of moderate Islam shall join you in this Jihad.

>>53127833
Poleaboo is just as British as anyone here

and every "FONT" post is a vote of support for him

have matched with 3 (three) girls on tinder today alone
I usually only match with 1 maybe every 2-3 days
what's going on lads?

Just woke up haha

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>>53127989
good bants

>>53127992
yes

>>53127979
>basic acts of compassion that anyone else would do.
but you didn't, fucking retard

>>53128018
hispanics are white?

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>no one at home
>go into the shower
>cry
>tell yourself you dont like who you are
>haha

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>>53128010

>>53128018
koush can kill himself desu

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>>53128010
/unjust

think kev will do the same and become an Alpha

>>53128018
based

>>53128018
>plural

>>53128041
prove that i didn't

>>53128018
all resistance to the US government is justified

>>53127992>
>Is "Danczuk" a Polish name?
Yes and no.

Dańczuk is.

Once they drop Polish diacritics and stop applying genders to their last names (Lisicki is a man, Lisicka is a woman) they're yours for good.

>>53128045
America
Yes

E pluribus unum

>>53128018
This Koush would say something different if it were a Native American tribe, rather than a bunch of right-wing militias, that are holding the federal government building in Oregon hostage while demanding the feds leave the land in their rightful hands.

>>53128003
they're starting to realise the validity of the claim your mum always put foward

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>he wouldn't shag a tranny

>>53126461
>>53126823
>>53126982
Looks kinda like an ugly fat version of Ava Dalush t b h

Fact: There would be zero Islamic terrorist attacks in the UK if there were no Muslims.

>>53128108

>gif

fuck off

>implying simon danczuk did anything wrong

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>

>>53128092
>Alright 14 year old white girl want free food?

>go to my grandmas house
>try to discuss emerging markets and the effect of iran's sanctions being lifted will have on the economy
>she tells me she doesn't want to talk about such things

what the fuck /brit/? where can i find other intellectual Financial Times reading types like myself?

>>53128108
only if she didn't have a willie and had a convincing fanny desu

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>>53128018
isn't people already a plural?

how can you pluralise a plural?

>>53128140
>7/11

kek

>>53128092
Nice tumblr filenames retard. Do you keep these images in your 'Muslims are actually really nice bait' folder?

>tell my mates about how i talk to /brit/ about real life advice
>they all talk shit on you
>"why would you accept advice from people on 4chan hahaha they're all freaks"

defended you lads tBh told them that you're all just normal people who need to outlet your frustrations on thought onto a place you're comfortable with

>>53128108
I got too good at spotting them, now I think everyone can tell as easy as I can.

>>53128183
haha normal haha

>>53128093
>Lisicki is a man, Lisicka is a woman
whoa

>greek/welsh means theyre paki
Fedoraman.jpg.exe (6GB)

>>53127508
>>53128092
they do this to draw the homeless in and convert them
they do the same thing to people in prison and minorities that feel jilted by the white man

>>53128162
consider the following:
*filters you*
lol

Lads, what can I have with faggots, I've got no mushy peas?

if singles, muslims are good people

>>53128198
haha doesnt matter tBh for the 2 years ive been here you've all been pretty much my 2nd best mate haha can confide pretty much anytnig in you lads

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>>53128010
http://www.brendanfraser.com/ even his website is [view attatchment]

>>53128238
curry

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>anon why arent you drinking?

>>53128256
Not a paki thanks.

>>53128252
weeew that website is outdated af

>>53128281
Alcohol burns my mouth haha

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why dont she like me lads

>>53128281
"what is that youre drinking"
*motions for her to hand me that square bottle*
*reads label*
"that is rotten hahahaha"

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>>53128281
lack of slags (apart from Rina ofc) is a tad disappointing giving the rep of the fine general

>>53128281
its haram

>>53128281
I'm drinking pepsi, are you blind?
>farts
>wafts it in their direction

IMPORTANT
POLL
http://strawpoll.me/6456457
http://strawpoll.me/6456457
http://strawpoll.me/6456457
http://strawpoll.me/6456457
http://strawpoll.me/6456457

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why has he been suspended? he's done nothing wrong

>>53128351
Literally crying right now haha

>>53128281
>I get sleepy after one round if I drink and there's five of you

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>>53128305
>im at home and downloading the cinematic gift that is "crazy, stupid love"

>>53126485
Its dull as fuck and drugs are common since there's little else to do.

ANOTHER
IMPORTANT
POLL
http://strawpoll.me/6456467
http://strawpoll.me/6456467
http://strawpoll.me/6456467
http://strawpoll.me/6456467
http://strawpoll.me/6456467

>>53128368
good lad

>early access games

remember when buying a game actually meant you got a complete game?

>>53128363
Pakis are allowed to groom whites but whites aren't allowed to groom pakis

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fun fact, these two are now a lesbian couple

>>53128387
yes that is me but im talking about a different bird im gonna message priscilla again tonight (since it's TECHNICALLY 1:08am) with the following

>did you ever end up listening to *song i recommended her* senpai?
>*song i recommended her link*

>>53128387
I'm a dumb poo poo head

new
>>53128434