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/brit/

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Thread replies: 382
Thread images: 52

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Pint of piss edition
>>
What you drinking lad?
>>
>get friends with qt girl from university
>we start to hang out with each other even outside of uni
>one day she sends me a message
>"Anon, I need help to move my bed....do you have time tomorrow evening?"
>Sure
>next evening I show up at her place
>since it must be a heavy bed if she needs help to move it I bring a friend with me
>she looks pretty shocked when she opened the door
>bed wasn´t heavy at all and we moved it maybe like 10 cm
>strange arkward atmosphere the whole time
>leave her flat
>she never messaged me again
>now, after 6 months I suddenly realized what actually happened.
>>
>I wish you anon a Happy New Year.
>>
>>53060679
why would she specifically need you to come all the way to move a bed? she would just ask neighbour/roommate for help
>>
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SHHAAAAAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!
>>
Azusa
>>
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crayon pop
>>
>>53060767
It was a pint of cider on new years day.
>>
>>53060776
Font
>>
>>53060787
She wanted sex
>>
>>53060776
now you know for next time
>>
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*having a look*
>>
>>53060776
That really wasn't necessary to repost that you bellend
>>
just spent 300 quid on jeans again lads ffs haha what am i like x
>>
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This uggo on the left messaged me on POF.

Should I ignore or message?
>>
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>>53060735
>no foam
>>
>Miss you!

t. oneitis in the summer of 2014 after not talking to her for a bit, one of the rare few times she messaged me first

where the fuck did it go so wrong
>>
>>53060821
good post senpai haha

>>53060837
Cara?
>>
just spent 300 quid on lingerie again lads ffs haha what am i like x
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMDgAevEJds
>>
>>53060757
>family listens exclusively to normie music
>they unironically have the audacity to say the music I listen to is shit
FUCKING NORMIES
>>
>>53060846
Literal bender.
>>
>>53060735
Holy shieeet, that's 35 quid right there
we got a rich boy right here lada
>>
>>53060776
I don't get it. Was she trying to sex you?
>>
>>53060710
>tfw no cool redneck uncle who kidnaps slags and lets you rape them in his trailer
>>
/brit/
>>
>>53060876
>He doesn't notice the hidden note within the drink
>>
>>53060848
>uggo
>on the left
you mean right? left is alri tbf
>>
>>53060868
COG
IN
THE
CAPITALIST
MACHINE
>>
>>53060866
post it
>>
>>53060846
what type of pants
>>
>>53060867
Ca va?


>>53060881
yes
>>
>>53060860
>i love you

t. oneitis in november 2015

where the fuck did it go so wrong
>>
Hello friends.
>>
>>53060919
FONT
>>
might do a wank
>>
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Cute girls
>>
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>>53060853
This is a meme in Dutchland.
>>
wish I could kill a paki and get away with it
>>
>rare feel when uni bed is more comfortable than home bed
good feel though lads
>>
>>53060925
alri
>>
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>>53060863
>Cara?
Yes
>>
>>53060919
how DID it go wrong in less than 3 months mate?
>>
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>>53060883
>ywn lose your virginity at age 16 to a qt slag tied to the bed and then cut her neck and set her body on fire
lmao just kill me already
>>
>>53060959
Having a wank
>>
>>53060946
Overrorke
>>
>I'm gonna cum

Oneitus back in 2010

Where did I go wrong?
>>
>tfw a girl has never said "I love you" to me
Feels bad lads, and it's probably never going to happen. I'm not even joking, if a girl sincerely told me she loves me, I'd probably cry like a bitch haha
>>
>>53060910
latex short shorts
>>
>>53060961
distance cucked us
>>
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>>53060942
>>
>>53060919
how'd you fuck that up
>>
>too warm with jammy bottoms on
>too cold with boxers on

eternal struggle
>>
>>53060982
M8...
>>
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>>
>>53061019
*cuddles u for warmth*
>>
>>53060913
Not so bad lad

Dealing with the usual bipolar stuff
Told several lasses I wanted to shag them and now they're chasing me.
I wish the medicine was working hahahaha
>>
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>>53060906
Nah cuz. she really ain't.
>>
>>53060951
all my uni beds were awful desu, not as bad as my gfs though. sleeping at hers was like sleeping on some kind of bare metal grating or something
>>
Lads I am having to use mobile network tethering so please only post small filesize images ok thanks
>>
>>53061080
FONT
>>
>>53060996
I got drunk with this girl once and we were talking about all of that and she started crying when I said I'd never been in love/never have had someone say it in that way hahahaa

must be alright then
>>
tbf lads I don't think a lot of normie music is "bad"

it just gets very repetitive

I often wonder if """"""""""""dj's""""""""""""" on heart fm and such are serious when they say "coming up next is ed sheeran, what a an absolute banger i love this" before playing it for probably not for of the thoisandth time. wouldn't put it past a normie to be that braindead
>>
>>53061080
Being manic can be pretty fun 2bh
>>
Need me bollocks stamped off Taylor Swift
>>
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>>53061086
WHAT THE FUG SHE IS FINE YOU NORMIE SPAZ
>>
>>53061097
what does this mean
>>
>>53060996
never had a girl say "i love you", though some girl I really wasn't interested in said "I think I like you" but she was a long distance Canadian who was literally reddit: the female

good nudes though
>>
been wearing same pants for 4 days straight, haven't taken them off, even slept in them.
>>
>>53061086
She's not that bad.
For an autist who posts on 4chan, you're not exactly in a position to judge
>>
>>53061123
She's a solid 7, cuz. Not worth my time.
>>
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>>53060982
Feel sorry for Brendan desu.
>Forced to rape and murder by his weird uncle
>Overbearing mum
>Fucked over by Jew lawyer
>Never got to watch Wrestlemania
>Looks like a young Kev
>Lower IQ than a hamster
>>
>>53061087
FONT
>>
>>53060996
i'd had a few girls say it when i was younger but obviously it didn't really mean anything back then

had my first actual "love" last year and it was amazing
>>
>>53061087
RON
>>
>>53061140
Her smile is too creepy looking.

I've been with better.
>>
>watching a movie with some girl I liked on her bed
>too scared to make a move
>girl asks if i'm cold and if I want to get under the duvet with her
>say "no thanks i'm quite warm actually"
>carry on watching the movie and then leave
>friend notifies me the next week that she asked him why I didn't want her and has now gone off the idea
>>
>>53061141
>>53061123
Literally both blind shes a fucking 5 at best
>>
>>53061155
FONT
>>
>>53061043
*strokes your hair with one hand and squeezes your bum cheek with the other*
>>
tfw in love with cock
>>
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>>53061145
>Never got to watch Wrestlemania
>Looks like a young Kev
mate...
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6CCePrJlaU
>>
Just watched Anomlisa. In a bit of state, this and Life is Strange in one week. Wew.
>>
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>manager at jjb
>>
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SO MANY NORMIES HERE RECENTLY

SHOO NORMIES SHOO
>>
>>53061185
>having sex with girl
>she asks me to start talking dirty
>nows my chance
>rub her thigh while kissing her neck and softly whisper into her ear "you have lovely skin, all credit to your moisturiser"
>>
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>>
>>53061232
what a slag lmao
>>
>>53061114

i bet you take it up the arse
>>
>>53061185
really wish girls would give me obvious signals like this but they never do
>>
Praise Farage

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lhAlaZk3eY
>>
>>53061155
How did you get it lad?
I'm a 4/10 on the best of days and have really bad self esteem issues and social anxiety disorder. Am I fucked for life or is their an actual way to get a gf when you're like me?
>>
>oneitus ask me to go to the cinema with her
told her no because I didn't like harry potter

>oneitus ask me to go shopping with her the following day
told her no because I didn't like shopping

>oneitus asked me to go round her house to keep her company
told her no because I was out with the lads

I truly deserve to be alone
>>
>>53061260
wouldn't be opposed to it tbqh
>>
>>53061206
wew
>>
I genuinely enjoy giving head
I like the feel of it growing inside my mouth and watching the squirms of pleasure
>>
>>53061145
>Number of Wrestlemania's Brendan has watched
since 2006
>literally = Nowt

lmao bet hes fuming
>>
i want to dislike coldplay but i can't lads

>tfw pleb

>>53061301
kent
>>
>>53061275
iktf
>>
im a professional machine operator
AMA
>>
>>53061301
>tfw you come out the shower, dick all cold
>tfw my ex put ehr warm mouth around my dick
>tfw dick grew instantly

That was the bets time tog et a bj, cuz. x
>>
hmmm lads my "kent" mini-gimmick is practically worthless now that she has a trip
>>
>>53061301
Ever thought about becoming straight la?
>>
>>53061185
>girl invites me over to "watch a film" in the evening
>says that actually she is busy until late so come over at around midnight
>we go to her room and she asks if i still want to watch the film
>yes pls
>she changes into pjs and gets on the bed, i stay in my jeans and hoodie and sit there and enjoy the film while she tries to kiss me
>"do you have a thing with you?"
>nope i thought we were just watching a film

and that was that, my chance to lose my virginity, completely ruined by my autism
>>
>>53061357
operated your mum last night

I can tell you keep her well oiled haha ;)
>>
>>53061363
>she

WAH HA HA HEYYY
>>
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>>53061289
willy is very slightly hard now x
>>53061323
>Brendan will NEVER watch Brock Lesnar break the Undertaker's streak
>>
>>53061377
your post is so cringey that I've actually hidden it m8
>>
>>53061362
FONT
>>
>>53061368
helllllllll no
women are disgusting
>>
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>>53061363
>>
>>53061275
My oneitis told me to get a Facebook account so we could talk, but I didn't have one and refused to make one. She asked for my phone number but I lied and said my SIM card was broke. I don't know why I did that, we could've been together right now
>>
>>53061438
i enjoy kentqt posts and as such i will not be filtering
>>
>>53061269
i had absolutely 0 self esteem and the worst social anxiety, but idk i was at uni and happened to be at pre-drinks and there were a bunch of spanish girls there who had only just arrived in the country, one of them just thought i was super attractive for some reason and completely forced it

basically i got lucky, i would never have been the one to force it. although i was proud of myself for asking for her number rather than the other way around
>>
>>
>>53061362
why were you having a cold shower and why was she stood there waiting for you to get out of the shower
>>
>tfw never felt these teenage feels
>tfw missed out on young love

FUckKkkk EVvERYThhhinnngh
>>
Debating on if I should have a wank or go to bed for the night.

Tough one.
>>
>>53061469
>i had absolutely 0 self esteem and the worst social anxiety
>pre-drinks

nah
fuck off normie twat
>>
>>53061477
m8 fuck that I just don't want to die a virgin
>>
gonna go shopping tomorrow lads and theres nothing any of you can do to stop me x
>>
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That War and Peace program on BBC was a bit boring lads. Some tidy birds in it though. Wouldn't mind nobbing Aisling though.
>>
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Just bought a 4chan Pass lads

Money well spent imo
>>
>>53061434
but men are so hairy
i mean like literally everywhere
>>
>>53061426
:( it's a true story though
>>
>>53061439
I'm the same guy

>oneitis keeps asking me to make a bebo
>told her no
She makes an account for me regardless

>made my oneitis make a runescape account and play with me
I was more concerned about teaching her how to light a fire than actually socialising with her
>>
>>53061512
good lad
>>
>>53061512
u focken wut now, lad?

god
>>
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>Just bought a 4chan Pass lads

>Money well spent imo
>>
>>53061512
seems well worth it at first but only problem is youre now basically on a yearly subscription to 4chan because when it runs out in a year theres literally no way you will be able to go back to captcha

t. yearly subscriber
>>
used to be an IRL meme-lord when I was already 17
>Someone would say something I disagree with and I'd simply say "implying and do the constanza impression

>same with "mfw" and do another dumb facial expression, like stress or disgust.

>Some guy told me he turned 22 in a few weeks and I'd say nice doubles, awesome

>said "lel" out loud when someone said something funny.

>Took pictures of myself and captioned them with stupid text, trying to turn myself into a macro image meme and posted it on facebook.

>Saved a picture of a girl I kinda liked and thought it would be hilarious to do one of those "0/10, wouldnt bang" comics by pretending that she's ugly, remember that meme? Like 4-5 people saw it and called me a faggot, threatened to beat me up till I told them it was just a meme and apologized.
>>
>>53061469
>i had absolutely 0 self esteem and the worst social anxiety
clearly not, fuckin normie twat
>>
>>53061525
don't know about you but I shave
>>
>>53061507
*drives katana through your gut*
heh nothin personel kid
>>
>>53061232
I am a female with Aspergers: The Poem
>>
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>>53061470
Honestly don't know what i'd do if i was sitting next to slags like these on a couch tbqh probably drop some spaghetti idk
>>
>>53061377
>on date with girl
>it's going well, she invites me back to hers for drinks
>sitting on her sofa chatting and drinking, normal convo nothing heavy
>she casually says she will brb and goes upstairs
>I'm sat watching telly and drinking my drink while she's doing whatever she's doing
>after a bit she comes back downstairs, with no warning, completely naked
>my autism goes nuclear
>make up some excuse and leave
>never speak to her again
>>
>>53061493
>>53061563
it was uni, my housemates used to drag me into the living room when they were having pres
>>
>>53061570
*its a hologram*
>>
>>53061556
Tom for days
>>
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wish i was as smart as wittgenstein
>>
>>53061606
fuck off normie
>>
>>53061477
>most people spent their teenage years with their friends having fun and sexually experimenting with girls

>I spent my teenage years locked in my room browsing 4chan, playing vidya, listening to music, crying and being suicidal.

Sometimes I wish I was a normie lads
>>
the feeling of having to wake up tomorrow and go back to work is utterly gut wrenching and tear inducing. I want to fucking die
>>
I will NEVER have a gf
>>
>>53061232

Is this American poetry? Prefer poems when they rhyme tbqh.
>>
girlfriends pussy tasted like piss today lads

being a normie isn't all its cracked up to be
>>
>>53061664
FONT
>>
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>>53061556
>Some guy told me he turned 22 in a few weeks and I'd say nice doubles, awesome
>>
>>53061556

I know a girl who says memes IRL and she's 24
>>
>>53061556
Sometimes when my friends say mad/dumb shit I can't help myself and I say "wew lad" out loud
>>
>>53061614
sometimes I think I'm smart but there are other times where I think I'm actually dumb but I've somehow fallen through the cracks and nobody noticed so I got away with it.
>>
>>53061556
saw this in another thread

confirmed for pasta
>>
>>53061664
what does it taste like when it's clean?
>>
>tfw flirted with girlfriend in year 11 by giving her 'luv' on bebo all the time
>tfw she let me finger her at prom and I just stroked her fanny lips
>tfw she's dating a fat german lad now

where does the time go
>>
>>53061606
>going to uni
FONT
>submitting to your housemates
FONT

you've no excuse for the first
your only excuse for the second is if they physically dragged you out kicking and screaming

you're a normie twat
>>
>>53061619
Pretty much the same apart from the 4chan. I spent it playing playstration, daydreaming that people liked me and with the occasional wish that I were dead.
>>
>>53061652
everyone from NZ is a normie lad
>>
>>53061664
Licking pussy doesn't appeal to me at all desu, no I'm not gay.
>>
>The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion.
>>
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>Prefer poems when they rhyme tbqh.
>>
haha loooool
rate?
>>
>>53061703
FONT
>>
>>53061232
how is it this bint expects to be taken seriously when she literally can't stop cracking little smiles every time she tries to turn up the slutrage intensity?

does she not know she's making a mockery of herself?

why try little girl?
>>
>>53061706
good lad
>>
>>53061740
shit bant/10
>>
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>>53061712
I know
The closest I get to being a normie is memespouting on /sp/
>>
lost my virginity to an escort, spent 4 years and lots of money having filthy pornstar type sex. when I got a gf, sex was basic, boring and unadventurous.
idk what to do with myself now, spoilt it for myself
>>
>>53061477
i came close desu

when i was like 15 i became "best friends" with this slag and she had a boyfriend and of course we were "just friends" but as we all know that is a meme and eventually we got drunk on the beach and kissed each other (my first kiss and one of the first times i got drunk) then this continued and eventually she admitted to me she had fallen in love with me and wanted to dump her boyfriend for me but the problem was at the time i had barely started puberty so had a tiny dick and was really self conscious about it so i tried to delay everything as much as possible and eventually it died out. she literally offered to fuck me and i just pretended i was the nice lad that didnt want to fuck a bird with a bf but really i just had a tiny prepubescent dick. was a bad feel growing up. could have been fully sexually experienced by the time i was 16 if my genes werent so shit.

dicks a normal size (6.5 inches) now at 22 in case anyones wondering x
>>
>>53061759
SIX NATIONS IS LITERATELY AROUND THE CORNER
>>
>>53061766
interesting post

but

RON
>>
>>53061766
puncture her vulva with an unexpected fist. see how she reacts she might like it and you can go back to the adventurous, disgusting unknown
>>
Another two in the bag, lads. Vaginas that is. Baginas that I am going to put my penis into. And by bag I mean confirmed dates. Two confirmed dates with female humans that will probably lead to sexual intercourse, is what I am trying to say.
>>
>>53061766
>>53061779
FONT
>>
>>53061766
Did it not feel better because you loved her? Don't see the point in having sex if you don't love the girl desu
>>
>>53061713
>selflessly pleasuring a woman in an intimate way that you can't do by simply fucking her doesn't appeal to him
shirt lifter
>>
>>53061797
howd you meet them?
>>
>>53061706
i went to uni to study, i didn't intend on being any sort of part of uni culture

and they didn't physically drag me but they put immense social pressure on me and i didn't have the self esteem to fight it

anyway i'm glad i didn't fight it because i lost my virginity and had a loving relationship with a qt spanish 18 year old who had previously been a virgin ;D

i'm better than you you bitter abnormie virgin hahaha
>>
>>53061797
RON
>>
Corbyn supports the IRA

'nuff said!
>>
>>53061797
hahaha that is one JUICY fabrication
>>
>>53061785
NZ should join 2bh
>>
>>53061185
hahahaha a girl did that to me and I did exactly what you did

you just reply even without thinking it through
>>
>>53061756
very rude
>>
>>53061797
>>53061821
>>53061840
>>53061185
FONT
>>
>>53061787
>RON
good post
>>
>>53061804
>this cuck trying to justify himself
Think you'd better get to bed lad. Big day of feminist rallies tomorrow
>>
what type of a creep keeps vaginas in a bag
>>
>>53061779
>came close
having a girl literally say she loves you, kissing you and offering to have sex with you isn't coming close, you fucking had teenage love.

fuck off normie, just fuck off
>>
imagine how good smartphones actually are for normies lads

like imagine having loads of friends and being proper into facebook, snapchat, instagram, whatsapp, whatever other normie shite and having people to use it all with 24/7

would be goat 2bh
>>
>>53061801
t. virgin

this is also why you are still a virgin
>>
>>53061664
>fingered a girl
>finger smelled like piss

put me right off doing that again
>>
>>53061839
Yeah no thanks
>>
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>>53061872
>>
>>53061886
>>53061892
FONT
>>
>>53061893
just because we'd win :^)
>>
>>53061839
>tfw no southern hemisphere vs northern hemisphere game

ree
>>
>>53061922
yes
>>
>>53061820
Dating apps.
>>53061823
Don't know what this means. Not been on /brit/ about a week
>>53061834
It's the Gods honest truth, though, me laddo.
>>53061854
haha nah
>>
Six hours, 40 minutes until I have to get up for work
>>
>>53061185
Been in basically this exact situation
Except instead of asking if I was cold she literally said " I need some dick" and I just said haha yeah and laid still, absolutely paralysed by my autism
>>
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>>53061861
>eating a girl out makes you a cuck
don't blame me when your girlfriend leaves you for Jamal and his big juicy fanny-licking lips you fucking gaybod
>>
might play some Arma lads
>>
>tfw a girl really liked you and even came out and admitted it but you pussied out
>>
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wew
>>
>>53061884
that's me except instagram 2bh
>>
>get gf and spend 2 years together
>break up
>have no luck with other girls
>think to myself that it was the lowpoint in my life

fast forward three years i'm a neet who hasnt kissed a girl since

how much worse will it get?
>>
>>53061892
>licking a girl out
>queefs in my face
>end up laughing while licking her out and the vibration from my mouth being clasped to her vagina while laughing makes her pussy juice spit out

never again
>>
>>53061875
b-but i didnt fuck her tho
>>
>>53061664
I once licked my gfs asshole and suddenly she screamed NO WAIT and a second later I tasted why she didn't want this that day
>>
tfw pull back your foreskin and pick off the smegma with your finger and lick it
you've all done it at least once, admit it
>>
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>>53061946
bet you roleplay as a black bloke
>>
>>53061930
japan's in the super rugby now
>>
The autists are angry tonight, lads. Mum forgot to buy tendies again.
>>
VBs are decent, especially for the price. Don't know what all the fuss is about t bh
>>
is RON from that weird song?
>>
>>53061970
>licking an arsehole
literally don't understand this meme
>>
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>>
>>53061943
see>>53061861
>>
>>53061971
No because I can't pull it back
>>
why am i aroused by farts lads
>>
>>53062003
>hes never had a girl sit on his face

Missing out 2bh
>>
>>53061512
welcome to the kool kids klub
>>
>>53061950

>Tfw a girl was pretty much begging for us to make out when we were both about 7 but I pussied out because was too scared of getting caught and I was disgusted by her freckles
>Tfw 20 years later and I'm still a virgin
>>
>>53061958
>get gf and spend 3 months together
>break up
>have no luck with other girls
>think to myself that it was the lowpoint in my life
>fast forward nine years I haven't had a friend of any kind since
>>
>>53062004
nice meme grandpa
>>
>>53061999
>>53062023
>>53062042
FONT
>>
>>53062000
>not buying DouBros
Why do you hate this country?
>>
>>53062008
how do you masturbate
>>
Japanese is such a vile language, I can imagine orcs speaking it in Mordor
>>
>>53062045
you win
>>
>>53062004
good meme
>>
fuck i have never wanted a gf as badly as I do now in months

honestly despise you normies
i envy you and i hate you
>>
This threads almost making me cry lads
I don't want to be alone anymore, but the odds of me ever having a gf that truly loves me is 1:1,000,000.

I don't even want to have sex, I don't even care if the girl is "ugly", all I want is for somebody to love me ;_;
>>
>>53062042
have you kissed a girl
>>
>>53062055

Didn't see them at the time

Most places were closed and I just grabbed the cheapest thing round the corner
>>
>>53062045
>>53062080
>>53062085
FONT
>>
>>53061664
>>53061892
>>53061970
I always make sure myself and my partner are clean before getting down to it. Smelling or tasting piss or shit is instant boner killer
>>
>>53061971
never done this
don't even remember the last time i had smegma, i actually keep my willy and the rest of my body clean
>>
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>>53061971
>>53062008
average FONT posters
>>
>>53062059
Rub it back and forth on a blanket
>>
Any FONTs want to answer this question

When people say ''I eat her ass out'' are they on about the shitpipe or the fanny?
>>
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What the fuck is a cheeky nando?

Some guy called me a cheeky nando
>>
>>53062042
>tfw remember being about 7 and all the class had gone to P.E and me and this one girl was left in the class because we were slow changing and she went "ill show you mine if you show me yours" then i went "you first" and she showed me her fanny then i got scared and ran off without getting my dick out

absolute madman 2bh
>>
>>53062085
spend your time fontposting and ronposting lad
>>
>>53061971
never done this, i barely have any foreskin at all
>>
>>53062100
nice dubs but how was my post normie?
(The middle one)
>>
>>53061971
>smegma
How the fuck did you get smegma?
>>
>>53062080
>>53062085
FONT

>>53062117
>ass
tell those yanks to fuck off
>>
>>53061971
Rank desu
>>
are oats carbs ?
>>
>>53062098
My uncles a full on VB drinking Victorian bogan so he put me off it a bit
>>
http://www.thedailytouch.com/sean/32-times-you-felt-university-was-making-you-dumber/

xD
>>
>>53062118
Fuck off cheeky Nando
>>
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>>53062118
>>
>tfw my foreskin was removed when I was 12
it happened before i got to have my first wank
>>
>>53062106
>>53062128
FONT
>>
>>53062117
both

You see the vagina and arsehole and nearly connected, as a consequence most of the time when you are licking a girl out if you are getting right into it you can accidentaly lick her arse.
>>
>>53062137
not washing for a month
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRBqsJNxMfk
>>
>>53062085
Then look for a gf you twat. There's literally thousands of munters out there waiting for a bloke who will just be with them and not ditch them after a few shags. I know this.
>>
>>53062106
Problem with arselicking isn't shitting (provided she's a hygienic person ofc), but farting. Farting gives it a bad taste as well.
>>
haha the only time i had a gf i was literally dragged by my hair across school to ask her out and then it took me a good 10 minutes to spit it out haha

still dont know why she said ok haha

i was 17
>>
>>53062159
>>53062178
>>53062189
>>53062190
FONT
>>
>>53062140
how are these posts normie?
>>
>>53062118

Assuming you're some kind of Mexican you could be easily mistaken for a porko. Maybe you did something a little cheeky or maybe he just doesn't like your kind
>>
>>53062087
Yep. Eaten and licked a girl too out but not gotten my dick wet yet.
>>
girl i like moved to another country fuck sake
>>
>>53061971
This smegma meme has to be made up by dickless yanks in a fit of the fox and the grapes.

Being a 4chan neet I have gone months without bathing before and I still didn't get a smegma build-up.
>>
oh my god /tv/ is still fucking talking about star wars
>>
what was your first sexual experience?
mine was getting a hand job from a girl in a night club toilet when I was 17.
was a girl I knew from college, she was chubby and ugly and I still remember the smell of sick and urine in the toilet cubicle.
>>
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>>53062143
pure protein pal
>>
>>53062117
I literally put my tongue into girls assholes. I love it. I also love eating pussy.
>>
is there any canadians in this thread?
>>
>>53062209
>>53062214
>>53062224
>>53062228
FONT
>>
>>53062228
fowl
>>
>>53062205
I too would like to know this
This FONT posting is out of control
>>
>>53062209
*and fingered
>>
>>53062228
ye the old tongue punch
>>
>27yo KV

need to top myself
>>
>>53062080
>fuck i have never wanted a gf as badly as I do now in months
innit

this is why the normie must leave
>>
>>53062224
thats a personal question, bub....
>>
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>>53062053
>>53062078
thanks lads
>>
>>53062189
I would only lick a twink's arsehole desu, women don't know how to clean theirs well enough because they have their fannies to fall back to
>>
>>53062205
the true abnormie has already accepted his fate and already has bigger issues
only a normie twat would cry about not having a gf
>>
>>53062224
Underage disco when I was 13, ended up fingering the girl too hard and went right up into her fanny and pushed against her cervix wall. Nearly vomited, imagine being happy as larry absolutely going at this nice tight wet fleshy parcel and then you unexpectedly feel a massive hard object.
>>
>>53062224
My first sexual experience was
>>
>>53062189
If I am going to eat a girl out, they have to have showered within the last couple of hours, I wouldn't let a girl suck my dick if I hadn't showered recently either. I like to keep it clean, it makes it much more enjoyable for everyone involved, and requires minimal effort
>>
>>53062246
>>53062251
>>53062254
>>53062274
>>53062283
FONT
>>
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>>53062224
asked a girl i liked for a shag and she said yes

Got had after ten minutes then shagged her for a good 2 hours haha
>>
>>53062117
i love eating arse desu

get my tongue right into their smelly arseholes xx
>>
>>53062283
>t. shirt lifter
>>
I'm not a normo
>>
>>53062228

Likewise do it with my gf on the reg

Fantastic having your face between a pair of cheeks
>>
i think i've had more internet friends in my life than ive had real life friends
>>
>>53062316
Doubt your wee sissy fingers are long enough to reach the cervix wall
>>
>>53062159
love abit of brown nosing 2bh
>>
>>53062302
>>53062310
>>53062314
>>53062325
>>53062330
FONT
>>
What was the first time you experienced listening to Cradle of Filth lads?
>>
>>53062325
that must mean you are
>>
>>53062334
I'd rather have no friends at all than just internet friends
>>
Time for bed I think

FONTs are getting out of line
>>
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>people in my country are having sex
>>
For me sex is all about the female's pleasure which is why I love eating pussy, especially after a big black bull has creamed inside her.
>>
>>53062310
>>53062314
>>53062330
FONTs
>>
>>53062334
FONT
>>
>>53062346
when my m8 was looking for loud shit music
>>
>>53062254
dunno why this made me laugh. probably because I read it in an aussie accent.
>>53062242
haha struggling to keep up with the normies, mate? Reminder this is a normie general
>>
>>53062370
Love eating pussy because of that taste 2bh
>>
actually lost my virginity to an 8/10 lads

she stopped contacting me after that but fuck it
>>
>>53062346
Like 13 when I was playing everquest
>>
>>53062341
>>53062342
>>53062358
>>53062370
>>53062384
>>53062388
FONT
>>
>>53062358
>>53062360
>>53062370
>>53062388
>>53062390
>>53062394
FONT
>>
>>53062388
The taste of cum fresh from a big black bull?

I whole heartedly agree!
>>
>>53062390
how much was it la
>>
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>shagging a cute lad up the bum
>you pull out and he immediately swings around and sucks your willy, getting it nice and wet again
>stick it back in
>repeat until you're ready to plaster his face in cum

is there owt better?
>>
>>53062412
t. virgin
>>
>>53062358
Night lad, sleep well.
>>
Don't go don't leave me now now now. While the sun smiles stick around and laugh a while yeah.
>>
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might get this jacket lads thoughts?
>>
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>>53062222
>>
>>53062390
good lad

the last gril i properly dated was so cute that name dropping her name to other girls in her grade/at school the same time as her made them think i was really cute and got several others because of it lmao

i love how the world works sometimes
>>
haha
>>
>>53062414
free x
>>
>>53062390
>>53062422
>>53062424
>>53062458
>>53062469
FONT
>>
sometimes my gf asks me if i want to sniff her arse when shes about to fart

love it
>>
>>53062448
>FONT
finished it for you x
>>
Mayo Slayer | Anti-Imperialist | Marxist-Leninist | #Antifa | #BlackForPalestine | @BlackAutonomy
>>
>>53062458

Girls are actually such catty retards you can get away with ludicrous things
>>
haha!!
>>
>tfw my oneitis has shagged literally all my close m8s over the years

>she fucked my oldest m8, who I've known since the day he was born when he was 13

>she fucked my other m8 on and off when they were 15 - 17. He loved going into details about what they did.

>at a party and she was flirting my with another very close friend when we were 18, she took his virginity on the night. I stole a bottle of vodka and drank it on the way home crying.

Feels bad lads. I've never even had a gf yet I've managed to get ducked 3 times by the same girl before I even turned 18.
>>
>>53062042
Alas, if only you had shagged that 7 year old girl you would no longer be a virgin!
>>
Lads there are so many unironic normies here I honestly feel physically ill
>>
>>53062505
top cuck
>>
despise normie cunts who think they're welcome here
any other site, literally any other, but they choose 4chan and ruin its culture. literal pakis destroying the host country

>>53062479
>>53062494
>>53062505
>>53062521
FONT
>>
>>53062494
the girl i got using her name first didn't even like her and was 2 years younger than her.

she just knew her, knew what she looked like and reasoned that if that girl wanted me, she does too. i was all about it
>>
>>53062224
was 16 at a shitty house party and spoke to a chubby girl for a bit

saw her again later upstairs and invited her to chill with me (was drunk). she accepted and full on offered to give me a blowjob. accepted and let her do it. it was shit. also got my first snog here

at 17 i was at a party in a big field, loads of tents. had a bit too many spliffs so i crashed in a tent to lie down for a bit after whiteying. a girl fell in later and woke me up, then i got close to her and we started snogging. fingered her and felt up her tits. she didn't know who I was and then when I was waking up a bit more I got out the tent

on my 18th birthday at this kind of rugby club place I was stumbling around in the wooded area outside having been drunk and punched earlier, then i started chatting to this random girl who was staring at me. snogged her, fingered her, and when we got into a private area under the trees got a quick suck from her and put my willy in her, sloppily losing my virginity. shagged her for a bit, not really knowing what I was doing, then fingered her and ate her out a bit. she remembered her friends and got dressed again though, leaving me blueballed


still 18 now and never had a gf or any sober sexual experiences with a girl, nor any real knowledge of how to fuck properly
>>
lads i think im dyi-
>>
>>53062516
more like everyone is baiting the font poster
>>
>>53062505
>avereage pussy eater
>>
>>53062505
why would you have oneitis for such a slag? dont get it 2bh
>>
had a few sexual experiences with a girl way back end of 2014/beginning of 2015 then we broke up in february. most of them were shitty, i was inexperienced and i was having trouble getting it up

we started talking again over summer, quickly started flirting heavily and i lied and said i was better at sex now when in reality i hadn;t been with anyone else

went to stay with her again in october and i had all the same issues it was really embarrassing, we'd been building up the big reunion for like a month and talking about all the great sex we were going to have
>>
>>53062530
>>53062533
>>53062550
FONT
>>
>>53062516
It makes me laugh when abnormies rave about night /brit/, because the normies are always out at this time.
>>
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>despise normie cunts who think they're welcome here
>any other site, literally any other, but they choose 4chan and ruin its culture. literal pakis destroying the host country
>>
>>53062547
>eating pussy is gay meme

t. virgin
>>
>>53062544
I would certainly like to think so but then again you are an unironic normie yourself so~
>>
>>53062516
>>53062544
/brit/ is literally majority normie. how are people still not realising this?
>>
>>53062575
>>53062571
>>53062565
FONT
>>
tfw look all your school mates up on normiebook, they're all trapped in relationships with ugly birds and have kids. toplel, their lives were over before they even began. they will never have no responsibilities or freedom ever again, they're ruined their lives. these people look fd up with life and absolutely knackered.

why do normies rush out little shits through their vile cunts at the age of 20 before they've even experienced life ?
>>
>>53062516
i'd be a normie if it wasnt for all my fetishes 2bh
>>
don't even try it

janny is watching
>>
>>53062547
you will increase of getting the girl to be your FWB if you eat dat pussy445 well
>>
>>53062590
/int/ has always been a normie board
>>
>>53062533
Fuck off actual normie
>>
>>53062516
youll become a normie too once, betray your ideals and become just as much of a self involved prick as the rest of them
>>
>>53062590
wasn't until you /sp/ refugee cunts invaded it
love how you complain about shitskins diluting britain's culture but you do the exact same to 4chan you actual dirty pakis
>>
>qt ask me to study with her after school
>we crack open the books and she starts looking for a pencil
>"hmm. do you have one anon?"
>she reaches in my pocket and starts feeling my leg for some reason
>get up and hand her the pencil on my desk
>"pencils are usually around desks, dumbass"
>we finish and she doesnt talk to me the next day (or ever again)
did the dumbass comment offend her?
>>
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>>53062605
>janny
>>
>>53062622
>>53062622
>>53062622
>>53062622

>>53062605
fuck him
>>
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>replies with 'FONT' to literally hundreds of posts per edition
>doesn't realise /brit/ is a normie general
>>
>>53062549
She was a very nice person desu and I don't get to pick who I love, even if they are a slag.
>>
gonna go on tinder some time this month lads x
>>
>>53062525

>autistic basement dweller """"""""culture""""""""
>no gf
>waifu posting
>pseudo intellectualism
>rampant insecurity
>racism to block hyper awareness of your own complete worthlessness

I'd rather have a chat with some good Aussie cunts
>>
>>53062621
Literal been on 4chan since 2005, dont even have a facebook. Infact my last gf was from /soc/

4chan can get you laid
>>
>>53061884
>tfw I open Whatsapp about once every hour so the four people I have on there won't see I actually haven't been active for months
>>
>>53062224
At 22 years old
My sister had interns in her company. Went partying with all of them, one intern had a crush on me and we secretly shagged on/off for several months.

It was quite nerve racking
>>
>>53062598
>i think my poo fetish stops me being a normie
a normie is a normie whether or not they have bizzare fetishes
FONT
>>
>>53062598
>>53062606
>>53062608
>>53062615
>>53062628
>>53062633
>>53062641
>>53062638
>>53062647
>>53062652
FONT

>>53062642
>I'd rather have a chat with some good Aussie cunts

Then leave and stop ruining this site
>>
>>53062346
After Noel gave me the CD
>>
>>53062598
go on...
>>
drugs
>>
>>53062671
i am not a normbally do not even SUGGEST it in my presence you invalid
>>
sex
>>
2 more years till wizardry
not ugly or fat or autistic, just never really been interested in sex
not even bothered if I died a virgin. I'm pretty content with my life as is.
>>
vaginas
>>
36 years old, when you get to this age sex is just another chore
>>
ya know... i've been visited by extraterrestrial beings before
Thread posts: 382
Thread images: 52


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