Has becoming an artist made you depressed, or cause any other

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>>2356956
Artist or not, I feel like I'd be the same sorry sack of shit I've always been. Knowing how to draw doesn't change that.

>>2356956
I get so invested that I have to choose between drawing or having a social life/doing chores/playing video games.
I am unable to draw and do something else without ending with chicken scratches.

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As an artist I feel kind of worthless. I hate this industry with a burning passion and I'm sick and tired of sucking up to people. I hate how uneducated I feel because instead of going for Engineering or Science, I was the guy who wanted to draw knights wielding swords.

On the other hand, I've moved out and have my own apartment, and if I took the Uni path I'd still be living with my parents and putting up with their retardation.

>>2356975
I really don't want to be that guy, and if not that's okay but could you show some of your work? Anything would be cool.

>>2356956
I was a social reject when i was playing games too, so no, it didn't affect in any way.
If this was stone age i'd just be lifting stones by myself and hunt by myself. I would actually be happier because money wasn't an issue back then.

I've had depression before I took art seriously but yeah, the intense "you gotta git gud", "there's people two years your junior who are twice as good as you", "they're gonna throw your portfolio into the trash without a second glance" mentality has really gotten to me because of the already crippling self-doubt and other shit.

It's getting a little more tolerable, though.

>>2356956

- can't pay rent
- don't have a career
- don't have qualifications
- nobody respects me
- i make up bs when people ask me what i do

I've not had legit friends in years, other than my significant other. Still, even we spend so much less time together than we used to.

>>2356999

As long as you are satisfied with how much practice you put in today, you'll be able to tolerate it.

Those kind of thoughts tend to get worse the more you slack off. I know from experience.

>>2356975
>uneducated
This is just you faggot. If you are taking art seriously, even if you are an illustrator or concept artist, you should be well versed in art history. Not only art history, but cultures, architecture, science, design, and literature. A good artist needs to be able to understand these things so they can be utilized for more engaging art.

The best illustrators and concept artists know their shit. If you get all of your inspiration from other contemporary illustrators your art is going to suffer because of it.

>>2357003
>hobbyist
Go work at starbucks and stop calling yourself an artist until you can actually make something good enough to call art.

>>2356956
Au contraire

I will probably had offed myself already if it wasn't for art

>>2357008

Nah. The field I am in is shit. What I draw that makes money is an embarrassment compared to works from people 100+ years ago. I don't respect the art industry in the slightest.

No one cares that you know art history, it's not relevant in the slightest. No one cares that you know architecture design. No one gives a shit that you know all of the veins, bones, and muscle groups in a human arm. It's all about sucking dick to get as many jobs as possible. True art is a dying field.

I only continue because I see a picture and I love all the colors and tones used, and how something looks. It keeps me going. I am a total pleb and so is every single fucker in this industry, from a total no-name faggot on /ic/ to Dave Rapoza.

>>2357020
>No one cares that you know art history, it's not relevant in the slightest. No one cares that you know architecture design
You fuckin missed the point of my post completely. Good art is created by knowing those things.

But whatever. I'm pretty sure you're mediocre shit anyways.

>>2357023

I'm pretty sure you're some miserable faggot who hasn't even started drawing and just hangs around /ic/ to shit-talk other people like because you are insecure.

>>2357008
>he best illustrators and concept artists know their shit.
Not really, you just have to know the basics of structures and their company will fly them to whatever place they need to reference to take pictures and implement the architecture almost to a tee.

You just have to be good at illustrating.

>>2357028

Could also just photo bash like 90% of professional artists.

>>2357007
Yeah, I know what you mean. The last year has been essentially slacking off. It's dumb because the times I DO put in the effort when I'm feeling 'okay', I obviously am I getting better. But as soon as I start getting negative again, it's like shit I did from middle school is a masterpiece compared to recent work and I should give up.
It's hard to look at skill level and work output objectively when your mentality is so warped. Sometimes I feel like I'm reaching the threshold of my learning ability, as well.

But like I said, I'm working on my 'attitude' and art. I'm in a pretty good mood at the moment though, so maybe I'm just being optimistic.

>>2357028
you... have no idea what's it's like to work as a concept artist.

not even a little tiny bit.

>>2357011

i am a hobbyist now. after doing this shit for the money for a while.

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I used to hate myself all the time for no reason but now I hate myself only when I draw garbage

>>2357044
Enlighten me then.
I've worked as a concept artist for a few indie games over the past two years, yeah it's a lot more work, YOU as the /artist/ have to do a lot more of the research but if you actually knew what working for a company that makes AAA games is like, you'd know how big teams are and how specific everyone's job is.

That's the reason why they can shit out such huge games in a relatively short amount of time.

Yes and no, I'm already prone to depression drawing, when I can't seem to produce anything good (99.9) just reinforces why I'm terrible at everything and should probably kill myself... But I realize that's not constructive and set my pity party bullshit to the side. I keep drawing anyways because that's the only way to get better.

>>2357020
clueless

>>2356999
The juniors being better than you part makes me want to kill myself.
Especially when taking up New hobbies.

>>2356956
Less sleep

>>2356956
Pretty sure true depression is with you or not, basically regardless of consequences.

I have no mental problems. The main thing I've noticed is that I feel like more of an outsider, someone who has taken an unusual path.

The main problem so far is a relative lack of cash, but I'm not struggling, it would just be nice is all.

>>2357236
And when I say consequences, I mean circumstances, lol retard.

>>2356956
It made me question my existence even more.

>>2356956
I wish I'd never been told 'Wow you're good!' as a kid, and that I'd never pursed it as a life choice.

I knew I'd be poor as an adult but I've been forever stuck in this rut where I can't fit in with the Fine Art world because I don't play the game right, and my work is obviously 'low brow', but I've spent too long in the Fine Art World to get over myself and properly do the commercial/low brow thing. I should never have gone to do Fine Art, I should have done Illustration. I can't get over these pretensions, I'm a fag.

I'm too jaded and cynical to try hard enough and fall into traps of normal things, but as soon as I start to get comfortable (focusing on relationships and jobs etc) I get upset that I'm not living the cliche crazy artist life and start destroying everything.
My youth is wasting away and I'll never amount to anything.

>>2357020
>Anon fantasizes about the art industry

>>2357254
i did a sculpture degree and wish id done illustration
whoopsie