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You are currently reading a thread in /fit/ - Fitness

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>today in class
>wearing a tight t-shirt because it was a nice day and i wanted to show off my gains
>friend sends me a text
>"looking pretty sexy in that shirt :)"
>assume he's just joking
>next class
>he and his gf sit behind me
>he comments how he hasnt noticed how big my shoulders are until today (i usually wear hoodies)
>he stars gently touching my back
>when i turn back he says it was his gf
>this happens multiple times
>ignore it
>he does it again
>turn around
>it was actually his gf
>they comment on thickness of my back
>then she asks if she can draw on my back
>say no
>then she aks if she can draw on my arm
>say yes
>she draws a :) smiley
>few minutes after that my friend asks me if i want threesome with them
>refuse because im a virgin and i have small dick
>realise my friend is a cuck
>mfw entire time
>>
U think ur dick is small because you spend too much time on the internet. Anything bigger than 5" is socially acceptable, i can tell you that for a fact because my ex was a prostitute who had sex with scores of men, and she said i was avg at 6" and she didnt mind it because i was good at getting her off in other ways

Here's my mirin story

>got a job at restaurant
>low test cutie brings plates for me to wash
>she spergs and breaks 4 plates while handing them to me

from the way she was acting i could tell it was spaghetti. Megan if ur reading this i think you are hot
>>
>>35803364
>Megan if ur reading this i think you are hot

I am reading :)
Ask me out this weekend!
>>
>>35803364
Avg for a loser who pays for sexs lmao
>>
>>35803364
Hey, It's Megan. I have a penis and was worried you'd notice it.
>>
>>35803364
Megan here, fuck off you gay fucking faggot
>>
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>>35803364
>>
>>35803316
>In class last week
>got my stretch navy blue shirt on
>gains are showing @ math lesson
>qt 3,14 small height huge ass and tits looks at me with a surprised facial expression
>'wow when did you get so buff?'
>idk mayne
>she draws a heart crossed with an arrow on my tricep then asks me to flex
>i flex my tris
>she does the check em facial expression
> Then I hear a voice echoing from heaven
>U mirin brah?
>I halucinate zyzz flexing and dancing
>that day was a good day
Basically she has a bf for like 2 years,she does slutty shit like change into gym gear in front of me at the schools gym,gonna fugg her so fucking hard brehs
>>
I'm fairly certain my new co-worker has a crush on me. I'm married, so it doesn't matter, but it still feels nice.

>be 6'3" 195lbs white guy
>she is 5'2" petite nerdy azn-american
>brought in cake for her bday last week
>said i wouldn't have any because trying to lose weight (cutting)
>"oh anon, heheheh, you're so big anyway hehehe"
>later that day
>she comes to say bye and thanks for the cake
>standing in my office door
>awkward, welp, see ya later type chit chat
>she rushes up to me and hugs me hard, squeezing my bicep with one hand and puts other hand on stomach
>wtf was not expecting that
>hehehe see you monday anon

I'm 30 and it's been a while since a girl i know has outright flirted with me because i've been with my wife for 10 years. Felt damn good.
>>
>>35803408

Prove you are really yourself somehow
>>
>>35803529
married at 20? damn. tell us about it.
>>
>>35803316
Guys im a bit confused. Some gym qt i know isnt interested in a relationship because I flat out asked her a year ago texted me if I wanted to have lunch with her on sunday. I dont know if I should ask her if this is a date and risk a friendship or if its just two friends having lunch together which ive never done with her, or anyone my age for that matter.
>>
I've gotten to a point where people rarely comment my body unless they're drunk, because it's so obvious that I lift and that I'm massive compared to most people.

>sitting hung over at a restaurant with some classmates
>girl in class touches my shoulder and asks if you're supposed to have muscles there
>feels my arm
>asks me if I'm flexing
>I say no, and flex
>She screeches

One of very few mirin episodes from girls.
>>
>>35803604
ever heard of friends with benefits?
>>
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>tfw skinny
>started lufting 2 weeks ago
>tfw no one will ever admire
>>
>>35803684

Just wait around 6 months to a year (or more), or whenever your gains are noticeable.

>your guy friends notice
>they either mire or get super jelly
>get eyefucked by jailbait
>get called baby daddy by middle aged (black) women

Mires aren't always what you expect them to be. Of course, you'll have regular mires and spaghetti and people will smile at you more.
>>
>>35803729
But im ugly and have no friends.
>>
>>35803752

Then go cocoon mode fuccboi
>>
>>35803752
then shut the fuck up because nobody gives a shit
>>
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>be me, dyel
>lifting for ~1 month now
>roommate has flu
>schedule change at work and only had one day off last weekend
>spent my one day off driving 3/4 of the way to Tahoe to dick around in the snow with my gf
>entire week be anxious about not having food to eat because no shopping
>have to go to fucking grocery store every other day so I can make lunch/dinner
>go to store tonight
>white strips, six chicken breasts, two low fat cottage cheese, vodka, bread
>expresslane.exe
>take all of my shit out of my basket because I'm not a cunt who puts the whole basket on the checkout belt
>45+ y/o mama in front of me
>buying that cabbage and shampoo and family shit
>dick around in my wallet for my ID because I look like I'm 12
>she smiles at me for way too long
>manage to get ID out of leftover spaghetti in wallet
>smile back at her
>she leaves
>buy my groceries
>pass by her in the parking lot
>smile at her
>she ignores me and loads her groceries into her jeep

d-did I make it guys
>>
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>>35803806
>>35803800
Will you guys be my friends and admire my aesthetics?
>>
>>35803752
And now I understand why. Go better yourself and stop being an obnoxious whiner.
>>
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>>35803316
Underage
>>
>>35803820
How?
>>
>>35803364
Hey its Megan. No homo when you suck my deek
>>
>>35803809
>lifting 1 month
>d-did I make it guys

uh, no.
>>
>>35803831
He has new lifters mentality syndrome. When I first started lifting, I thought I was Zyzz the first week at the gym. This was two years ago
>>
There's a guide that someone on /fit/ recommended and it's basically the ultimate no bullshit way on how to improve your appearance as a man. The guide broke down the whole thing into the "10" point system so that you could see what you had to concentrate on more in order to gain more points. (Like going from a 6/10 to an 8/10) From what I remember, hair was super important and had the ability to knock you up at least one or two points.

Does anyone know what I'm talking about?
>>
>>35803364
Megan here. You are the one who breaks the plates and dropping spaghetti everywhere.Also your ex told me that you were a prostitute who had sex with scores of men
>>
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>>35803499
>she does the check'em facial expression

CHECKED...
>>
>>35803604
For god's sake stop being such a nerd, go and have a good time, and talk to her about it.
>>
>>35803885
I would like to read it.
Anyone who has a pic / link?
>>
>>35803316
damn OP, i got my dick out and everything expecting it to be some hot bromosexual shit
>>
>>35803316
Fuck guys.. this happened to me two days ago. I'm such a fucking sperg and lock up with girls unless I'm drunk, and I stopped drinking. Someone help me..

>at gym getting good pump on with me bruder
>my bud and I are doing the general checking out every single lady at the gym and asking each other if we'd bone them
>I see this lady that is around 45 and realllly fit, has aged well, and clearly has taken care of herself (I'm 27)
>I glance at her a few times throughout the workout and she glances at me, and at one point is just smiling at me when I glanced at her
>think nothing of it and continue on to skill crushers
>as I'm sitting down on the bench preparing mentally, she walks over and grabs a weight from right next to me, then walks behind to my left a few feet
>after about 5 seconds of her doing this, I turn and glance at her and she has a huge smile on her face and says, "oh sorry did I get in your way?"
>I, caught off guard because I'm a sperg faggot, say in an unemotive flat tone, "oh.. uh.. no"
>she starts telling me that she is new to this gym and got an injury in September but is now working out a lot again
>I try to not be a sperg and ask her about her injury for small talk, but I again have no smile on my face because I'm sperging the fuck out and am conversing in a very uncharacteristically flat tone
>Anyways, I get a slight chub from this whole thing, and she is doing squats right next to us
>my friend does 65 pounds with the EZ curl bar for skull crushers, and then I start to rack on what amounts to 100 pounds on EZ curl and start up my set and hear her clearly say "oh my..." making is quite obvious it was directed at me since she again, was standing a few feet away the whole time
>I don't say anything else to her because I'm a sperg faggot and she walks about a second later saying, "well, bye"

Fucking kill me.
>>
>>35803529
>puts other hand on stomach
Thought you were about to pull a "solid".
>>
>>35803885
I don't but I'm interested now.
>>
>>35803729
>tfw gains just now starting to become noticable after 9 months
Can't wait for those mires.
>>
>>35803927
>>35804027
Found it. Not as long as I remember.

http://sluthate.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=9183
>>
>>35804086
That shit's autistic as fuck
>>
>>35803364
Megan here. Sorry but 6" is way too small. The plates slipped because your soapy hands dropped them. We'll never be a thing. Sorry.
>>
>>35804086
Advice for balding men is to get a transplant, lol fuck that just shave it
>>
>>35803997

This isn't a big deal at all, next time you can prepare yourself. Play it off "sorry I was in the zone" and continue normally, girls are easy to get to talk.

You can ask her questions and basically let her do all the talking. Ask her if she's from the area (don't word it "where do you live"), why she chose this gym, what she does for work etc.

You got dis bud.
>>
>>35803997
"so, do you want to grab a drink later"

easy as that my man
>>
>>35803499
Let us know if you've had success. Good luck mate
>>
>>35804139
Yeah I mean, my friend said it wasn't a big deal, and said she had been checking me out the entire time I was there. My eyesight is shitty though, and my friends tastes a bit different than mine, so even though she still was about 5 feet away, I couldn't get a clear enough look.

It reminded me of that seinfeld episode where Jerry dates that girl that looks different in certain lighting.

Anyways, Yeah.. I was planning on saying something like that, because i do mentally prepare each set. So I was in the zone..

>Ask her if she's from the area (don't word it "where do you live"), why she chose this gym, what she does for work etc.

thanks m8

>>35804152
Yeah.. I will. after I talk to her a bit like the other fellow recommended.

I feel like I need to do it next time I see her or else her interest will fade. Didn't even get her name..
>>
>Sitting in Starbucks with brother and his gf
>Sitting in the back by a window
>We kind of talk where I am relationship-wise
>At some point I mention that I don't think I'm that popular with girls anyway
>She tells me "You just don't notice. You've got your fans" and tells me to look outside the window
>Outside in front of the Starbucks three girls sit and one is looking right at me for a second and then shying away
>"Right? She's looking the whole time, you idiot"

Felt pretty awkward actually. I was never able to derive any confidence from stuff like that.
>>
>>35803997
Was machst du nur Bruder
>>
>go from 120lb auschwitz to 150lb dyel at 5'9
>see dude from high school at 7-11 today
>wearing tank top, pumped (upper day)
>"damn anon, you're getting huge"
>"you been hitting the gym?"

is that babby's first mire
>>
>>35804232
Same here. Like, what am I supposed to do with that information?
>>
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>about a week ago at gym
>doing tricep pull downs. Like a b0ss
>9/10 female asks me if I'm using the other side of the machine
>I say nah monotonously
>she's at least 3 inches taller than me
> I think nothing of it since who could ever be attracted to a manlet
>vascularity begins protruding
>mirror is next to us and I'm watching myself while watching her steal glances
>she gets closer, litteraly 2 inches away from me
>trying to concentrate on lifts so I pause and pretend to stretch a foot away
>this happens for about 15 minutes
> she turns around and begins to talk but I have headphones in and the track was peaking af!
>turn my head and continue blasting triceps
>she leaves after I rudley curve her
>was too beta to say a damn thing, masked by faux alpha facade
>mfw I wish I could rewind time and hold a conversation with cutie
>>
should we move mire threads to asp?
>>
>>35803316
don't do it if you don't want to
furthermore, if your boy is comfortable with this what's your problem?

maybe they have an aggrement like "threesome with a guy and threesome with a girl" kind of deal
or maybe not, you don't know and you have no reason to judge
>>
>>35804282
>>35804232
You're supposed to be able to hit on girls because you now know they want you. How can that not be obvious?
>>
>>35803499
>slutty shit like change into gym gear in front of me
that's not necessary slutty. person doing this could have completely different mindset
>>
>>35804286
Why must we cuck ourselves?
>>
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>>35803729
>get eyefucked by jailbait
the best perk of getting /fit/
>>
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I only got openly mired by a gay dude at work
A mire is a mire I guess
>>
>>35804330
physical growth is different to emotional growth
>>
>>35803408
kekd hard
>>
>>35803529
I like this story. How old is the qt?
>>
>>35803604
Stop putting her pussy on a pedestal sperglord. Just hang out with no assumptions. And don't be weird about it or else you'll fuck it up. Srs question, are you a virgin?
>>
>>35803662
>she screeches
Was she retarded?
>>
>>35803364
How is spencer shay doing?
>>
>>35803604
>risk a friendship
this isn't a thing
>>
>>35803729
>get called baby daddy by middle aged (black) women

They call every man baby daddy. If he gets scared, they know he was the one.
>>
>>35804914
fucking this^this
>>
>>35803316
ARE YOU AN AUTIST, FUCK HER AND LET HIM BLOW YOU FOR FUCKS SAKE.

You will regret not doing it later, these are the experiences you SHOULD take advantage of
>>
>>35803316
>>realise my friend is a cuck
kek
>>
>>35804313
Whatever you say slut
>>
>>35804810
maybe she hates normies?
>>
>>35805054
Same thing 2bh
>>
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>>35804286
amazon chicks are hot
>>
>>35804933
kek
>>
>>35804933
Top zozxle
>>
Any weight lost 'mire here?
>>
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>>35803477
Underrated post
>>
>>35803684
We're all gonna make it breh
>>
>>35804286

she's probably even more interested now you blew her off.
>>
>>35803316
>>then she asks if she can draw on my back
>say no
>then she aks if she can draw on my arm
>say yes
>she draws a :) smiley

You shouldn't sleep with her as she's clearly 12.
>>
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>>35803529
> 30, 6' 3" 195 lbs

Michael Phelps!

Man, just like to say, you really stood out in Beijing. I was still in High School then and ignorant about sports but you were like a fucking hero. To this day, 'Michael Phelps' is a synonym for 'greatest fucking swimmer'.

Shouldn't you be in /fraud/?

>>35803316
> knew what was happening right away
> actually believe this happened
> too young for blatant cuckery though?

OP, wtf man. You refused, sure, just playing hard to get. You gotta tap that ass while he watches.

Get some Phenibut off PowderCity and gelatin capsules "0", I use NOW brand. You don't need a capsule machibe, put that shit in a little bowl, take the longer half of the cap and push it down in the bowl, repeating until the powder catches and gets compressed. Take about 5 of those before you make your move, and 10 before you tap that ass.

I was surprised myself that this shit works. Removes all anxiety. Like the benefits of being drunk without the negatives, you can still drive (carefully) in fact reflexes are enhanced, just don't text and drive on that shit. Music sounds amazing on it, you're going to be singing along to everythinh.
>>
>>35803604
Just fucking go to lunch and let it be. See what happens there
>>
I work in a bank and my gf loves it because shes says she loves men who dress professionally and that I look hot af when I got my clothes on.
Any who
>class after work
>haven't had time to change
>usually change out of clothes so they don't get dirty or just want to be more comfy
>go to uni
>after class, in line to buy muh steamed dumplings, shrimp teriyaki and brown rice meal
>qt 7/10 in front has ordered already and waiting for meal with friend
>notices me and positions herself to look at me while also talking to her friend
>has huge smile and I always catch her making eye contact with me
>at one point bites her lip and looks me up and down so visibly
>give her a smile back, I get my food before her and give her a wink as I walk to my table

Another story starts of the same but now I'm already sitting
>just by myself eating with my work clothes on
>see two qt 8/10's goth/emo/scene chicks
>they're both whispering to each other as they stare and wave at me while giggling
>I act stupid that they're noticing me until I give them back a slight wave and head nod
>they get up and leave and wave by to me

When I get mires, I'm usually wearing my dress shirt and tie. As a teller I don't wear suits. I make sure to get slim fit shirts to show off my gains but idk if it's because I'm big or I'm good looking. Never really considered myself hot or even handsome
>>
>>35803364
>my ex was a prostitute
>>
>>35803316
ayy lmao
>>
>>35803499
>brehs
>brehs
>brehs
SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU PEWDIEPIE REDDIT PIECE OF CANCER
>>
>>35803885
Pls someone /r/ this
>>
>lifting for 10 months
>at gym
>Filling up my bottle
>qt girl thats been there before me walks up to me
>"looks like your doing pretty well''
>Implying my progress
>but i'm a retard and didnt realise it at the moment
>respond with
>''f-filling my bottle with water?''
>realize how much I just fucked up
>speedwalk away

First time someone approached me tho

Which was nice.
>>
>>35803316
damn son. that's a heavy mire.
>>
>>35803364
>my ex was a prostitute who had sex with scores of men
dude wtf
>>
>>35804363
Uhhh, source?
>>
>>35803529
>6'3" 195
>cutting

Doesnotcompute.png
>>
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>>35804463
that's the most profound thing I've ever read on this site
>>
>>35805525
What the fuck
How autistic are people here?

I thought it was a meme but the more posts I read the more I realise people here are genuinely on the spectrum
>>
This whole thread is full of autism.
>>
>>35805777
Trips confirms
>>
>>35804286
>15 min triceps pull downs cmon
>>
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>>35803684
You are at where I was 6 months ago. I believe in you anon
>>
>>35803316


god damn this post made me laugh
>>
>>35804914

Yes it is. I made some moves on girls who didn't like my advances. We never spoke again and even when we see each other around we don't say hi.
>>
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>>35805525
Lol that was funny faggot you shoulda carried on with it

> I have a lot of practice
> Looks like you're doing good yourself
> I didnt catch your name / How've you been?
> Lets link up, grab a beer, whats your number.

Ta-da, smile, say "I wanna fuck you" with your eye contact but over do it and it looks like "I wanna murder you", its a thin line.
>>
>>35804969
>LET HIM BLOW YOU
never change, /fit/
>>
>>35806056

Yeah I lost that battle, no biggie tho.

I hooked up with another gal a few weeks later, going on our 2nd date tomorrow.

Probably helped that she reacts the same like me.

>walk over to the dumbells
>see qt girl staring at me as I walk over
>I look back
>she looks away
>"can I use this bench?''
>''No, yes.. fuck! Just take it please!''
>we both laugh
>find out she's studying to be a vet
>ask her out to the zoo

I would have probably never started a conversation is she didn't spill spagetti over my bench.
>>
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>>35804463
One is easier and hopefully give me the tools to gain the other
>>
>>35806529
fake story.
>>
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>>35803499
>she does the check em facial expression

>check em

>mfw
>>
>>35803364
The shit I read on this fucking board
>>
>>35805484
found the autist
>>
>>35803997
ahahahahahahahahhahahahahahah

for real that was fucking perfect
my fucking sides
never change /fit/
>>
>>35805576
>>35805428

If you can turn off your emotions its a pretty sweet deal, they are very fun to hang out with, always bought me beer and cigs, and even gave me food etc in exchange for sex... She liked having sex with me that much, i guess just to forget about her clients
>>
>>35806002

and? do you miss their companionship? or you just mad you need to find jack off material elsewhere?
>>
>>35808823
> or you just mad you need to find jack off material elsewhere?

Mostly this. I would have liked to have had a hole to fuck and some female companionship. But all this neglect has turned me into a real asshole and misanthrope, I find I'm a lot angrier now than I used to be. But oh well, they were dumb cunts anyway.
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