Who else lunk at the gym?
Share your best tips for lunking, judging, and other such lunk things.
Not allowed: alarms, women, children, pizza, bagels
>Through me you enter into the city of woes,
>Through me you enter into eternal pain,
>Through me you enter the population of loss.
>Justice moved my high maker, in power divine,
>Wisdom supreme, love primal. No things were
>Before me not eternal; Eternal I remain.
>Abandon all hope, you who enter here.
Tell me what happens when the lunk alarm goes off. Do orderlies come to wrangle the lunk out of the building, or is that section of the gym closed off until they leave?
i typically work out in the middle of the night, so i never get to see daytime shenannigans or NYRs/DYELs doing weird shit. BUT, i finally decided to take a daytime vacation and went at 10pm, just to see the gym when its a little busier. it was weird seeing other people in the gym, especially someone else doing deadlifts - the guy was doing reps with about 450lbs.
right in the middle of the cable machine, taking up four spaces, was a DYEL doing cable flies on a bench that he had drug all the way across the gym, AWAY from the 15lb dumbbells that would be the equivalent of what he was doing with the cable machine. every time mr. deadlift grunted up the weight and dropped it, DYEL cablebro would shake his head and make angry sound effects. he soon remarked to his other DYELbro about how he wasnt going to get a membership past the free week, to which straightbrimmed hat DYELbro nodded in agreement.
wtf is wrong with people, and why doesnt anyone like having large guys moving huge weights around to show them what they could be if they work hard and eat right?
Really though, any tips for getting /fit/ at planet fitness? I'm cheap as fuck and don't want to shell out a bunch of cash for a different gym.
Been doing squats/bench press on the smith machine, and I use dumbbells for everything else.
Just follow the bright purple van bro
>see gym near where I work
>fuck it, its cheap, I'll take a look
>forced to take a tour with a guy
>"we don't care for 'bodybuilders' and other lunks"
>he literally says "lunk" unironically
>no bench press, no squat rack
>smith machines everywhere
>tiny free weight section
>wants me to sign up then and there
>"just wanted a tour bro"
it was like i was touring through hell with satan as my guide
but jesus it's fucking cheap
what if I took a towel and wore it like a bandana? is that breaking the rules?
Is this some kind of joke or do they actually set off an alarm if you really exert yourself?
This is clear overt racism
The text under that sign is no different from slut shaming.
>Becky is shaking her butt, wearing a low cut top, and drinking a giant Starbucks...what a slut!
>implying you can't be low body fat while natty
>its actually real
Well fuck me.
Why is it okay to shame people who actually work out?
Lets start a class action lawsuit against Planet Fitness. We could legitimately win. The culture of animosity and shaming they promote is both emotionally damaging and detrimental to ones mental as well as physical health.
>Planet Fitness was featured on THE TALK today in a fun game called "Dunk-A-Lunk" that the hosts and some audience members participated in.
There's a place for people like you
>tfw no squat rack and don't want to use the smith so I end up putting the bar across the top of this thing and low bar squat the thing out from atg so I can move somewhere else to do my sets
>>Planet Fitness was featured on THE TALK today in a fun game called "Dunk-A-Lunk" that the hosts and some audience members participated in.
I don't know why everyone here hates Planet Fitness so much. You bros don't remember the dark days before PF got popular and it was like January 2nd forever. When I used to go to Bally's there was always a steady stream of pudgy nevergonnamakeitass motherfuckers doing infinite reps on 10lbs. dumbbells in front of the racks or doing weird exercises with the plates in the free weight area. PF is a failure magnet, just don't go there and appreciate that they soak up 90% of the people you don't want to see at the gym.
this is my fucking gf
trying to get her to lift, but all she does is infinite reps of 10 lbs dumbbell press, and infinite squats with the 20 pound fixed barbell.
If I tell her to go even 5 pounds heavier she thinks it's too heavy
Just low key drop a hint that she's fat or unfit or something, and make sure she knows she has to increase the weight to fix this.
Even better have another woman tell her this, preferably a girl that looks much better than her
Woman instinctively do absolutely everything wrong when working out. They make sure to do as little work as possible in their "work out."
>2lbs will do it
>I'll sit on one of the recumbent bikes and peddle 1mph while paging through a magazine
>5 reps from the knees aught to do it
>time to take another selfie *duck face& and peace sign while casually rolling eyes*
then you have the fucking crossshitters acting like they're the shit and calling themselves powerlifters because they have a big ass, wear yoga pants, and finally after 3 years hit lmao2pl8 diddly doo.
Check out this video
I fucking lifted more than her in highschool, but the fucking arrogance is what gets me pissed.
I would honest to god swing at her BF on sight for posting something that caused me so much frustration, fuck him, fuck her.
>hyped up on coke and hyphy juice
>go to punching bag
>punch the shit out of the bag while cussing out its mother telling the bag to go fuck itself
>run to the deadlift station while pile driving manlets that get in my way
>get to deadlift station
>take knife out
>cut hands to coat hands in blood for grip strengh
>get ready to deadlift 8 pl8s
>start hyper ventalating breathing really heavy while yelling the whole time
>pray to lord zyzz while at bottom of deadlift
>exert motion while screaming at the top of my lungs, mouth foaming, sweat dropping, shitting pants, and cussing out the faggot whose stairing
>I yell out to him
>"YOU MORTAL, WHY DOES THOU STARE"
>drop deadlift and hurl barbell with plates on it at his face
>he dies on impact
>some manlet is by me
>he is hlf assing deadlifting
>pick him up and crack his spine
>take his station and up the weight to lmao 10 pl8
>at this point my hair and eye is glowing and my final power level is revealed
>moment has arrived
>entire gym is running out before...
>before it happens....
>take one breath
>scream kaaaa maaaayyyy haaaa maaaayyyyy
>next three episodes consists of me screaming ka may ha
>finally grab the bar while screaming at the top of my lungs
>lungs blow up
>entire city is destroyed from my voice
>local old people retirement can hear my screams and they become deaf again
>lift weight up to the top
>spine snaps in half
>zyzz comes back from the dead
>grabs some creatine
>injects it right into my spine
>spine heals magically becoming reinforced with steel
>at the final moment
>drop the bar
>entire state is engulfed in nuclear explosion
>no big guys left
This ain't your gym, bub.
>I AM THE WAY INTO THE CITY OF WOE
>I AM THE WAY INTO A FORSAKEN PEOPLE
>I AM THE WAY INTO ETERNAL SORROW
>SACRED JUSTICE MOVED MY ARCHITECT
>I WAS RAISED HER BY DIVINE OMNIPOTENCE
>PRIMORDIAL LOVE AND ULTIMATE INTELLECT
>ONLY THOSE ELEMENTS TIME CANNOT WEAR
>WERE MADE BEFORE ME AND BEYOND TIME I STAND
>ABANDON ALL HOPE YE WHO ENTER HERE
your pleb translation doesnt even have a rhyme scheme
That poor man, he's selling his soul on live on air. And those clueless women eating up that drivel.
That said, I now want to do filthy things with Julie Chen, which is a weird feel.
just curious, is referring to steroids as 'breakfast' actually a thing? if i wanted to get steroids at the gym would i loudly talk about how i have a mean craving for pancakes around the swolebros?
>outperforming professional athletes
what pro athletes is she outperforming?
>I am the way into the gym of woe
>I am the way into skinnyfat people
>I am the way to where lunks feel eternal sorrow
>Abusing skellies moved my architect
>I was raised her by greedy sick cunts
>selling subscriptions to people with no intellect
>Only skullcaps and bandannas you cannot wear
>Fatasses eat pizza and can barely stand
>Abandon all gains ye who enter here
Yeah, I belonged to a PF in university. I only went at night and the guys on the desk didn't give a shit about deadlifting.
Finally quit when I came back from Christmas break and they're removed almost all the freeweights to make room for more machines. This was probably four years ago now. Spent my final semester paying a friend of a friend ten bucks a month to work out in his garage. In addition to his power rack and weights, he also let us use the fridge and a communal industrial blender as long as we cleaned it out.
I honestly miss that garage a lot.
Because they don't want to get "big". Because then they'll look muscular, and not feminine. And if she's not feminine, then she loses her self-worth. Because for women, their worth is determined only by the man they can attract. Because our culture (and most others) see women as instinctively less valuable, for some bullshit reasons. And women only value each other by the quality of their mate; and shallow, ethereal standards of beauty and lifestyle. Which means most only care about being thin, delicate, and fragile like porcelain. Or they go full-retard and think being fat as is somehow the superior choice because is "defies society." Even thought they just become a different kind of obnoxious burden. So the few women who do break free and get strong as treated with contempt by those who followed the crowds. The best women of course don't give a fuck, and are cool for it.
And yes: I am mad.
>tfw no bad bitch gf
how to into boss hoes who are also my gym partner
>tfw no megsquats gf
Wait so are people actually defending the guy throwing a temper tantrum like a 14 year old?
The whole lunk thing is retarded too, but if you react like that instead of calmly leaving and never doing business with them again, I think you need to go back to school instead of working out.
>have two protein shakes, a protein bar, and scrambled eggs for breakfast and lunch because I'm out of everything but whey, milk, and eggs
>get to planet fitness, stomach is gurgling like I just drank two protein shakes, a protein bar, and scrambled eggs
>warm up on the smith machine
>intestines feel like they're going to rupture
>bowels are doing the frantic post-coffee lurching outward, threatening to coat the floor with chocolate whey lumps
>want to at least finish my warm-up set
>get to 10
>let out one of the nastiest, most gruesome-smelling and -sounding farts I've ever had the pleasure of birthing
>sounds oddly like a loud moaning, bordering on yelling
>few hamplanets nearby stop talking and give me the death stare
>start sweating and turning red
>then the smell hits and their nostrils flare, token "you killed everything good in the world" look
>a few more seconds pass
>the lunk alarm goes off
>mfw I set off the lunk alarm with my protein fart
I used to work at this shit hole.
I would get high af and go into work just to sit down, check people in, and watch fat people attempt to work out.
Not calling out those who are actually trying.
Just those fat fucks who would come in during pizza day with their fat family and eat a whole pizza to themselves, do the 30 min circuit, and then leave. Not coming back until next month.
I have so many horrible stories from that place.
Since these businesses are usually privately owned the general digression of the owners is;
"I own this place therefore I get to decide who is judged and who isn't."
As this guy rakes in over 200k from each of his 5 locations every year.
>mfw i'm opening a new pf in my town and i'll be at front desk
>tfw we're not allowed to touch the lunk alarm
also why do I have to learn this gay ass script
>Join a newly opened Planet Fitness last year because I'm cheap and got tired of paying Anytime Fitness ass rape prices
>Everyone who works there are total bros and no one gives two shits about people grunting
>No dress code. I've literally lifted wearing jeans and sandals several times. No one gave a shit
>Huge free weight area
>Dumbbells go up to 80 lbs
>4 Smith Machines
>2 actual benches
>They've only had that dumb ass pizza Monday twice
>Once when they first opened and the Monday after New Years to lure the fatties and take their money I guess
The gym isn't bad at all. I really like it, actually. Only downer is that you have to make due with dead lifting and squatting in the smith machine. I guess it also depends on WHY you're lifting too. I'm not trying to get fuck huge on steroids, and am mainly lifting for aesthetics. Works perfectly for me. 10 bucks a month and it's 5 minutes from my house.
Good god what the fuck is that guy at 1:13 doing
there are no barbells in pf
smith machines only
lat curls bro
this really seems like the way to go and i wish i knew more guys thatd be willing to pitch on something like this. ten guys willing to rent a commercial garage and fill it with weights, a super private club where us richbros can lift in semi-homoerotic privacy.
Thats all in line with the official Crossfit motto: Attack it until you snap it, walking is for pussies anyway
>no deadlifting warning
>on Smith machine area
> deadlifting on a smith
>lifted wearing jeans and sandals several times
>Huge free weight area
>Dumbbells go up to 80 lbs
>4 Smith Machines
>Only downer is that you have to make due with dead lifting and squatting in the smith machine
Your gym sounds super shitty. Enjoy your nogains.
It's a gym for people who don't workout.
It's also just DIRT cheap. Free to sign up, $10 a month, open 24 hours. Honestly if you're doing basic lifts/maintenance its not a bad option. But if you want serious gains look elsewhere b/c lolnobarbells.
>aka irl tumblr
Also Checkd for trips bignig
It comes from Arnold calling dbol the breakfast of champions while popping them like candy. Now some people like PF think people will eat actual steroids with milk in a bowl.
Talking about pancakes might get you actual pancakes if your lucky. Your new swole gym buddy could take you to Denny's to eat big.
> I've literally lifted wearing jeans and sandals several times.
> Dead lifting and squatting in the smith machine
> I'm not trying to get fuck huge on steroids
You belong at PF you fucking dork.
You should never say shit like "I'm not trying to get fuck huge on steroids" unless you are retarded or have a vagina.
Don't get me started on lifting in sandals.
You shouldn't even be wearing sandals in Planet Fitness. Normally I would encourage sandals in the gym shower to prevent athlete's foot, but no real athlete has ever touched the shower at a Planet Fitness so that's probably not a real concern.
PF has already sealed your fate to never make it.
>apeal to people who dont work out and are afraid of gyms
>make regular gyms seem like scary roid head hangouts
>promise that my gym is a nice place for normal ppl
>make membership cheap enough so mebers wont bother canceling if they dont come
also PF is not gym aroding to their commercials
I also have to use a smith for squats/bench because at he gym at the hospital I work at, some dyel weeb in finance deemed free barbells a liability.
Have to deadlift and row with a hexbar too.
it really is brilliant, strange that noone thought about it sooner. By catering to the lazy, unmotivated and timid they get a steady stream of income with little wear and tear on the equipment.
As someone from germany I always laughed at Planet Fitness. Now that I am moving because of university I realized that it is really hard to find a gym with a big freeweights area, a powerrack and a bench and maybe a platform. I mean I would like bumperplates (preferably colorcoded because it looks cool) but that is just too much to ask. Most gyms have A LOT of cardiomachines, a lot of useless machines, TRX band area, "functional" area which is comparable to a kids playground, sunbath, wellness area, rehabilitation area (mostly focused on back injuries) and other shit. I swear they have so much meme shit it is not even funny but most of them don't even have a rack.
I mean seriously who the fuck goes to a gym to have a "functional" area where you throw around balls and do pushups ? Or who uses those TRX bands. Not even crossfit guys could use this fucking gym because they have no bumperplates and not even a fucking rack. And the best thing is they charge 30-60€ a month which is crazy. I am really frustrated right now I feel like there is not a single "hardcore" gym in my area.
>Not even crossfit guys could use this fucking gym
Crossfit gyms usually have great equipment actually, but they're expensive and you have to work around the times of all their classes and group bullshit
People talk about PF like the weights aren't heavy there, but they're heavy. Especially if you travel a lot, they put PF in places near airports and shopping centers, they're rarely hard to find. And $20 a month. Fuck haters. My PF is all old folks and cardio kids.
> "ricky is drinking out of a gallon jug of water wow what a lunk"
>A JUG OF WATER
so you get judged for not wanting to keep refilling a bottle and just getting your daily intake of water the easiest way possible during sets, but its okay for fat cunts to show up 2 times a month to the gym they pay for only to eat free pizza and bagels.
And now I have to use this gym cause I just moved and its the only one nearby. Fuck
The people in this video are a bunch of children. If you don't respect the rules, you'll be asked to leave. "What the fuck, man?" You're a goddam adult, you know what the fuck. If you refuse to respect the rules of the gym, you can leave, that goes for any gym.
>Smith machines defy gravity, making the weights not heavy
It's behind the counter. Mine only sets it off when you drop weights because you were obviously lifting more than you can control. Otherwise, it's bad for the weights, it's bad for the floor, it's a meme.
Smith machines do not engage stabilizers the same way doing the actual lift does. I guarantee you'll squat one plate less when you hit a real rack.
Also, the weights are locked in a vertical line, which is sub-optimal for some compounds.
You are, in fact, weaker than somebody who lifts the same weight with a real rack. Just because the weight is static doesn't mean the way you bear the weight isn't dynamic, fuckwad.
If that's all it takes for someone like you to give up and go home, that an exercise is for one reason or another suboptimal, then get the fuck out. "Not gonna make it" is bullshit, there are ways around every deficiency, and every process has deficiencies. Just because you're not smart enough to figure it out doesn't mean the rest of us aren't gonna make it.
How heavy is heavy? The heaviest I've heard is 80 pound dumbbells, and that just won't cut it for me. I've also heard most of them lack power racks and bench press benches with a bar. Is that the case in your experience? Because I would call those pieces of equipment essential, and without them it wouldn't be worth joining a PF.
I'm not, but you said that the weights are heavy. I wouldn't say I require a powerlifting gym, either, my 1rms are only 325 for bench, 415 for squat and 525 for deadlift. I'm not pulling 600, I'm not benching 400, I'm doing weights, for the most part, that I've seen others do in every gym I've ever been a member of (two university gyms, Goodlife Fitness and my current public municipal government gym). I'm a bodybuilder, but I'm not a powerlifter, and I would say that while my weights are great for the average person, they're not extremely impressive for anybody who's serious at all about lifting.
If you're defending PF as a convenient casual gym for somebody to get their doctor recommended physical activity, then I agree entirely that this might be the case, but what was said was that the weights are heavy, and based on what I had heard, they're not heavy, and they omit important pieces of equipment. Is that true or false? I ask because, as I stated above, I haven't been in one before, and have only heard what these gyms are like.
There's a fair bit of stuff they don't have. My PF goes up to 80lb dumbbells, for example, and there are four Smith machines and plenty of flat and incline benches, but one decline bench and no bars. But if you walk into other gyms here at twice the price, you'll find a lot of similar shit you don't like at your level. Categorically disregarding Planet Fitness is a meme in that case, you should be disregarding all casual gyms, which make up about 70% of the market here.
Ah, that makes more sense. I find it surprising though, to be honest. Maybe because I'm Canadian, and it's an American thing, but all the gyms I've been a member of, and all gyms I can recall even visiting, have had dumbbells that go to 110, with the highest in a commercial gym (non powerlifting) was 140. Almost all the gyms have had power racks and benches and free bars (one gym I visited several years ago in Dundee in Scotland only had a smith machine). So would you say it's normal for most American gyms to forego power racks and to only have dumbbells that go up to say 60 or 80 pounds?
I'm a retired guy now, but I used to travel a LOT in the US and Canada for work, and I can tell you that the only US place you'll find gyms like the one you're describing making up any more than like 50% of the market, between national chains and local gyms, are cities with a big university (like K/W Ontario) and Texas. Lifting at an advanced level, not even a competitive level, is a niche in most places.
That sounds reasonable. I can definitely see the utility in Planet Fitness in that case. And it's funny, right now I live in Newfoundland, which has a pretty huge fitness community proportional to our population, but the other place I lived in Canada for a long time was Kingston, so you hit the nail on the head with that one. I wonder if the university gym I visited in Scotland is representative of most gyms in the UK as well.
Different culture, Canadabro. I know a kid in Nottingham who has a bitch of a time finding a place to work out. His gym for years had most of what he needed, but topped out at 30kg barbells, and when he needed to go up, the owner just told him it was time for him to find another gym. It wasn't like when Scott Herman threw a Youtube tantrum outside of his old gym, but he was pretty pissed. This is a kid that fought through years of rehab and setbacks and PT and shit to even get up to 30kg and he loved that place. In my Planet Fitness, I'm there right now waiting for the wife, there are 40 treadmills, about the same number of ellipticals, but not one adaptive motion trainer. Six about machines, no free bar.
would go to a gym with that attitude
Is this the fat IT guy from the Jurassic Park who steals the eggs and then dies as he's running away in the car but it's raining and so he goes open the gate and then shit happens and a dinosaur kills him?
It's just a business model guys
>cheap membership, easier to just pay even if you don't go
>need large amount of members in order to be profitable
>need 90%of members to never actually use the gym
>discourage people who actually use the gym more than 1x per month from coming
>play on the insecurities of people who are out of shape
>encourage those people to sign up their insecure friends
I think you'd be more likely to win with the no bandannas thing and how it unfairly targets black people. I've heard of similar cases where business got sued for banning weaves because it unfairly targeted black women.
>why doesn't anyone like having large guys moving huge weights around to show them what they could be
Fucking nailed it. That DYEL isn't going to make it. I remember when my buddy Tom started coming with me to the gym, the first few sessions he wasn't really feeling it but still tried to stick it out. The third day we came we walked in and saw a big black dude squatting 350ish for reps, and Tom said that's when it clicked. He saw that guy and thought, "damn, I could do that someday. That's what I'm working towards."
He didn't think "that guy's intimidating and an asshole" because he's not a fucking retard and he actually has a shred of ambition.
This. "I'm not trying to get huge, I just want to be aesthetic" it's the same fucking thing, except one involves roids. You want to get bigger. Lifting at a real gym instead of being a retard won't turn you into Ronnie Coleman.
And if you think deadlifting and squatting in the smith machine is anywhere close to the same as the real thing, you're a retard.
You're actually totally right that lots of gyms are shit for people who actually lift. People just single out Planet Fitness because they actually pride themselves on that, and that's their thing.
Why are these people so piss scared of being judged.
Youtube videos of you only crop up if you have some hilariously bad form. No one cares about fatties because at least your trying to make a change. Every gym I've been to everyone has been super respectful unless your being a retard with no etiquette.
I'm a 6'0 145# distance runner, got kicked out for "intimidating the other patrons" by going too fast on the treadmills. I have a membership to use the treadmills in bad weather when I want to get my intervals in. Apparently trying to actually train makes me "intimidating."