>>35660205 Knowing that ill never meet the women of my dreams, the military is a scam and not what i thought it was like a cool place where you murder terrorists, etc. Lifting is what keeps me from killing myself. Also what makes a person an emo?
>get first gf >everything I ever wanted >gorgeous >wants to start a family >3 months ago starts pulling away, acting colder >I'm not a quitter, I fight for relationship >she continues to get colder, pushing me away >we break up friday >against my better judgement I went to her house uninvited to try and work things out >she wants no part in rebuilding it
I will use my pain as fuel in my journey. I will leave humanity, and the woman I love, behind.
And before you guys start, I know it was dumb to go back, but she has forever changed me, no person on earth makes me feel like half the man I felt like when I was with her, I had to at least know it was done and that I did everything I could. And (thanks to my sisters advice) I went ahead and deleted all of her contacts and pictures off my phone.
>>35660509 I don't actually mean I am going to start doing synthol and taking 30 scoops a day, I used it as a hyperbole, I'm just going to try to be the best version of myself I can be, and I will do that by trying to be a better version of myself when I go to sleep than I was when I woke up.
>>35660497 You know what? I know I am being a pussy and I can't help it. There is nothing I have ever experienced as soul crushing as seeing someone go from having the biggest smile on her face every time she sees you and telling you she will be yours forever as you hold her in your arms to having a pained, annoyed, look on her face when she sees you and recoiling at your touch like you're some sort of leper. I know it's pathetic and I'm a pussy, but it still hurts more than anything I have felt before.
>>35660632 I know the feel bro I thought I found my soulmate only to find out it was all a lie.
I'm just lifting the pain away and every time I think of her I remember how she use to tell me I was "the one" and how "I was the man she had been waiting for her whole life". It puts me in such a bad mood all I want to do is push myself and force myself to feel pain the next day. As long as I'm in physical pain from lifting I can't focus on my woes.
>>35660483 Almost same situation I went through man, except I let it fester for almost another year. Had 2 relationships after that breakup, and I let her fuck with both of them, because I wouldn't give up on her.
Take this advice from me, she isn't as good as you think she is, and what you had wasn't as special as you thought it was, cutting ties like Facebook and shit was the best decision you made.
>>35660675 I don't know if I should be mad at her for telling those lies, or mad at myself for believing them. I wish I could tell you how to get through it, or how it will pass, but I can't. What I can say is you aren't alone, and that you deserve better than someone who takes you for granted.
>>35660773 People have been telling me that all day (and by people I mean my family) but it was so special to me. She was my first true girlfriend, and while I fooled around before, she was the first one I ever really imagined myself being with for my life. I wasn't her first boyfriend, and not the longest tenured one either, and I think what really hurts me right now is knowing that she will never remember me to be as special as I will remember her.
And don't praise me about cutting ties, it was pretty much all my sister, who can best be described as a female, more assertive, version of the stepbrother on Forgetting Sarah Marshall
>>35660883 The fact of the matter is you did it though bro, your friends (or family) are supposed to be there for you on that shit. It's the most cliché saying of all, but you have to give it time. Socialize with new people, just with the intent of socializing, nothing serious. Spend time with your family and friends. And most importantly, DO NOT DWELL ON THE PAST...cannot empathize this enough my friend.
This will not break you, it will make you stonger, we're all going to make it brah
>>35660979 I know you're right, and I am trying really hard to keep my mind off of it (watching a fuck ton of movies, finished Primer, about to watch the Prestige) and it works but any time my mind wanders I think of all the good times we had.
>>35661069 Only time and a little bit of willpower will eventually erode those thoughts away, you have to literally change the way you think, which isn't easy and takes time.
Try to focus on only the present and the future, focus on your lifts (I assume you do if you're on here). That's what I did.
If you really feel like you can't function at all, talk about getting on medication, but you probably don't need this. I was on some for about a year, but I have depression, there's no shame in excepting you need help if it's really bad, just don't stay on that shit.
>>35661066 I'm taking it you're an undergrad. Here is some advice from someone that was top tier at my undergrad and am now at a t14 law school; "intelligence" as people commonly use it, is certainly useful to have but it is far from the most important thing in academic settings. By far the most important thing is determination. Even being as smart as I was I made sure to go to every single class, do every single assignment, do anything I could.
And a little more on intelligence, or at least my personal take on it. I firmly believe everyone (save for extreme outliers like downs syndrome kids and people like Albert Einstein and Archimedes who truly could see more than the average man) is as smart as everyone else. It might be applied in different ways, but the aggregate of everyone's intelligence is virtually the same. The hard part is finding a balance and focusing your efforts on the right things. It sounds like you're putting yourself in a good place anon, don't be discouraged.
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