Some trip is recommending this on /r9k/ How does this look for

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pls respond

Had to Google French Press, wtf that's just a skullcrusher or triceps extension.

Anyway it's a shit routine.

Military press, shoulder press, french press and pushups are all pushing motions that target your triceps and chest/shoulders. Having only 2 exercises for the rest of your body causes imbalances.

Routines like SS and SL can be basicly done with dumbells, although you might have troubles adding weight to squats and deadlifts without a barbell.

Do this 3 times a week with alternating between workout A and B, examble monday A, wensday B, friday A, monday B, wensday A, friday B... and so on.

db stands for dumbell

A
5x5 db squats
5x5 db benchpress
5x5 db rows

B
5x5 db squats
5x5 db overhead press
1x5 db deadlift

Also did you read the sticky?

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>>35595946
I provide an official response

>>35595902

>Some trip is recommending this on /r9k/
>recommending this on /r9k/
>on /r9k/

I'll let you figure this one out OP

>>35596081
I've read the sticky and I know barbell exercises are superior, but I have been given some dumbbells with weights that go up to 25kg on each one
I'm looking for something I can do in my room

I can already squat and deadlift the 2 dumbbells pretty easily so maybe some olympic lift or good mornings are in order?

>>35596105

I am 37 years old.

My mother still buys me candy when I visit home and hands them to me the same way she did when I was a kid.

I work as a data inputter at a logistics company.

I have no friends.

I have no girlfriend.

The last time I kissed a girl was 1997.

The last time I got drunk was around 2006.

I am a virgin.

My dad left my mother for another women when I was very young.

For my birthday last year I booked a motel room and paid for an escort but when she turned up I felt sorry for her and gave her the money and told her to get some sleep but she laughed and called me a bunch of names and left.

I was attractive in my late teens and early 20s buy my looks have worn off.

No girls notice me and I don't feel worthy of being noticed.

Sometimes I drive to McDonalds after work and buy way too much food and eat until I feel nauseous and then lie in the backseat while listening to R.E.M.

Last year I developed a crush on a girl who works at an Arby's near my workplace but when I asked her out she seemed to hope I was joking and said no thanks.

My old neighbour had a pet dog that I'd look after sometimes but he moved out and now all I have are the plants I try and care for.

>>35595902
French presses are part of my routine, 1cup x 3 to start my day.

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>>35596242
You're not gonna make it anon.

Just an hero

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>>35596289
Don't fucking reply to me ever again unless you are going to contribute something meaningful to this thread

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>>35596242
You are the one holding yourself back dude. Call another escort. Tomorrow. Get that shit out of the way. Go on walks. As far as you have to go. But strike up a conversation with at least one person while you're out. Don't go home if you haven't.

Fix your problems.

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>>35596325
>contribute something meaningful to this thread

I did contribute
I suggested a way out of your pathetic existence. You're beyond redemption, just give up.

>>35596350
>>35596369
I aint a mad salty person. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. But sometimes I wanna take tha ghetto n' crush it until it becomes dust. I'm pissed off--not tha picturesque kind of pissed off (reflection of a angsty, good-lookin thug leanin they head against a funky-ass bus window while it rains on tha other side) yo, but tha banal kind of pissed off, tha kind you can't put up in a noize vizzle, tha kind that's borin up in its own abstract type of way: standin up in yo' room at night lookin at yo' misshapen grill up in tha mirror, wonderin how tha fuck nuff phat muthafuckin years you gonna have ahead if you git yo' shiznit together right dis moment; standin barefoot on tha carpet n' feelin a perpetual inward pressure, closin up in from all sides, vaguely crushin up in its incompletenizz n' halfhearted up in its cause, leavin room fo' faint tracez of hope ta paw at yo' straight-up core, ta git you outta bed every last muthafuckin morning, makin da most thugged-out shitty minutes not tha shitty ones yo, but tha phat ones--the five or so scattered minutes a year where you reminded of what tha fuck you missin up on (happiness, confidence, self-affirmation, n' other wonders), n' reminded, wit a profound feelin of pain dat seems ta originizzle somewhere behind yo' ribs n' up in yo' chest--not yo' ass, exactly yo, but round there--that dis is how tha fuck people--normal people, you tell yo ass at dis point--live every last muthafuckin day, a existence you gonna never be able ta truly embody yo, but be condemned ta experience up in short, tantalizin bursts--findin lil' small-ass pocketz of air on tha sinkin shizzle dat is yo' game, pockets dat will by no means save you yo, but merely keep you goin until tha next breath--trick you, straight-up, tha fuck into stayin kickin dat shit, yo. Life, up in dis way, is offhandedly wack.

>5 reps with dumbbells
no no no that's just retarded, if you're using dumbbells you should be doing 8-12 rep sets

>>35595902
> listening to a tripfag
> going to /r9k/
Just kill yourself already you fucking oxygen bandit

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>>35595902
>calling flyes shit
>offers this ridiculously terrible routine
>"DO THIS EVERY OTHER DAY"

>>35596242
Hey anon. So in response to your initial question, which was whether or not the pic from r9k would be good for a dumbbell routine, the answer is no. In that pic you would be working shoulders, triceps, lats, upper back, legs, and pecs. That's retarded and whoever posted this is probably stuck in dyel mode, especially if he is hanging out on r9k.

Forget about finding a good "dumbbell routine". That means nothing. Get a membership to a gym.

And if I could just give you some advice, I'd say you have to make some lifestyle changes in conjunction with improving your body. If you think your life is going to improve just because you have the body you want you are wrong.

Now get some steroids, hit the gym, get the fuck off 4chan and make something of yourself you pathetic faggot. You can and will make it if you want to.

>>35595902
Three shoulder presses plus push ups. That's way more than you need. Especially with so little pulling.

No hip hinge. No twist. No carries. No abs.

Here's my list:
Every workout and every exercise do 25 reps broken up however you like of:

One arm bench press / gorilla press (one arm OHP) (alternate these workout to workout)
Pistols (single leg squat)
Cross body deadlifts (weight in left hand and standing on right foot) (10 reps each hand)
Waiter's walks (carry one dumbbell overhead walking around) (1 min each side)
Man maker rows (do a push up on the dumbbels, then do a row on each side)

>>35596081
>1x5 db deadlifts
Are your really this much of a faggot?
Try 5x12, OP, don't listen to this cunt.

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/r9k/ pls go.. but you can leave your pepes on the way out

>>35596475
crossfit bullshit detected

>>35596562
>5x12
>60 reps of deadlifts
Nigga what

>>35597561
its DUMB BELLS not an actual barbell so he can't load weight on it

>>35596242
Hey, I remember you

>>35595902
A beginner routine should have an equal amount of pushing and pulling movements, an equal amount of horizontal and vertical movements and an equal amount of upper body and lower body movements.
It should have a rep range of 5-8 and last no longer than an hour (<150 reps total plus warmup).

There, now you can answer this question for a lot of routines yourself.

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>>35596413

>>35596242
Fuck that's depressing

>"routines" that don't use percentages of the max effort

>>35596242
How the hell does one end up like this? Fuuuuuuuuck

>>35596242

I really hope you'll make it.

>>35596242

Get a dog ffs!

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>>35596242

>Sometimes I drive to McDonalds after work and buy way too much food and eat until I feel nauseous and then lie in the backseat while listening to R.E.M.

>>35596242
ffs stop feeling sorry for yourself and start fucking living, do whatever you want. Your life is obviously shit so you have nothing to lose, start doing whatever you want and stop being a faggot.

Ditch r9k and start going out for whatever purpose wether it's just to walk around town.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself, stop being a faggot and start living. the fuck senpai?

>>35598198

Please recommend a DB routine that fits your definition. Thank you.

>>35602808

And only DB, meaning no bench, no pullups, etc. I've been looking for such a program for a while and OP's program looks like what I had imagined for a good beginner DB program.

>>35596081

Op's program is intended for people who have nothing but DB's, I think, that's why there's no benchpress, because there's no bench. Is it worth doing on the floor?

Also, isn't workout A and B too small?

DB squats, sumo squats?

Also, what's wrong with French presses? They work fine with triceps in my experience of them.

What's DB overhead press if not a military press or a shoulder press?

Deadlifting DB's seems rather pointless, it's not a barbell, it's impractical at best, or am I wrong?

http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/rudy6.htm

Opinion on this?

>>35603227

This has curls, can I skip the curls without risking muscular imbalance?

Can anyone respond?

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>>35595902

>>35603619

>poor
>requires DB plus bench

Not that poor.

Explain this me, OP says to do military presses plus shoulder presses, and he's told that it's too much, but your pic has bench presses then inclined bench presses

This also has work outs almost every day.

I'm not convinced.

>>35596242
The last time you kissed a girl was when i was born, just think about that anon.

>>35603684

Oh wow, amazing! There's no last time YOU kissed a girl. Just think about that, faggot.

>>35603619

>poor
>requires DB
>requires a bench
>requires a pullup bar

Do you know how much money is required to have all three?

>it has curls
>isolation exercises

Too many exercises, also. This picture is bullshit.

Doing only pushes one day, only pulls another day, that ain't good either.

>>35603660

Use a fucking sofa as a bench, or lay on the floor. It's not that hard.

>OP says to do military presses plus shoulder presses

You do Arnold Presses on this one and lateral raises.

>and he's told that it's too much

That dude is obviously a retard who doesn't lift.

>This also has work outs almost every day.

You mean 4 days per week.

>>35603760

>>poor
>requires DB

That's the whole point. Two DB handles and DB plates are cheap as fuck.

>requires a bench

Lay on literally any surface you can find, including the floor.

>requires a pullup bar

Hang on literally anything you can find and that won't break from your weight.

>Too many exercises, also. This picture is bullshit.

What is a bodybuilding routine?

>Doing only pushes one day, only pulls another day, that ain't good either.

What is a split?

>>35596242
Honestly dude... just leave.

Travel the world. You're 37. You have no upward mobility in your job. There's no hope of any fruitful career for you in the states.

You are in an ideal situation. You have literally nothing tying you down. You don't have relationships (except your mother, but it's been 37 years. She can handle you leaving), no obligations, no potential. When you go you will be leaving nothing behind.

If you're worried about survival, don't. Take savings if you have them of course, but in your situation they're really not necessary. You're human and not a retard. It's really not that hard to survive. Worst case scenario you'll live on the streets, but when you really think about it, is that life so much worse than your current one? At least you're seeing something different everyday.

When you go all around with no end in sight there's no telling where you end up. It's like rerolling your life. For all you know, you could end up a chef in some tropical nation, spending your days cooking and surfing.

But please do this. You are in the almost ideal situation. Anything is better than what you have now.

I don't see how you can train chest without a bench or back without a pull-up bar, or legs at all with just dbs. I guess if I was too poor to afford all that stuff id just stick heavy stuff in a backpack and do push ups and step ups. Curls with Dumbbells and then I dunno wtf for back, I guess just rows but man a pull-up bar is like £15 and would be so much better

>>35595902
Well, it's terrible.
Still better than not doing any exercise at all, thou.

>>35604032
>Well, it's terrible.

Apply changes to it until it becomes good in your eyes.

You can't add a bench, or BB.

Go.

>>35596369
how does that bait taste

>>35604202

Do this. Anyone.

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>>35604581

>>35604675

C'mon, my program is very similar to this one, so I'm getting concerned. Or am I getting memed?

This program has a bit of everything, so why is it wrong?

My program was recommended by /fit/, too, and it was almost exactly like this one, so what gives?

Come on, homos, stop sucking cock for a minute and tell us what should be changed to OP's program with DB's.

I don't care for bodybuilding shit, I want strength and esthetics, not clouds.

>>35603818
Listen to this guy.

It's not too late to turn your life around. Go and do something, live as a hermit or something, discover your passions in life, become a modern day diogenes of sinope , live a simple life and chase virtuous pleasure.

>>35596081

>Having only 2 exercises for the rest of your body causes imbalances.

Even if it's the squat and the row?

Also, what's a DB overhead press? Because I looked it up and it looks like shoulder presses. Should it be done seated or standing? SS is always standing, so I'll go with that.

Is that how you get T-Rex mode? Because T-REx mode sounds like muscular imbalances to me. What gives?

>>35605125

Let's begin by giving him a good DB workout that he can follow without doubting.

How about this one:

>>35603227

Or is this bodybuilding shit?

>>35605134
Good idea.

Also don't listen to the people talking about overtraining in this thread. As a beginner the chances of over training are miniscule especially with dumbbells. Avoid working a body part twice in 48 hours but you can work out everyday if you do some form of push/pull/legs split with dumbbells.

It won't take long until you max out on dumbbells and you'll essentially just be doing conditioning training with them. This isn't a problem though since you'll be bigger than most normal people anyway.

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I always do a lightweight French press before my actual workout, great way to warm up. Pic related

>>35605170

What's a pulling exercise with DB? Rows?

>>35596242
I can just imagine some neckbear lying in the back of some old shitty saturn covered in big mac wrappers and nugget bites listening to Everybody Hurts lol.

>>35596242
>R.E.M.
Well there's your problem.