>tfw I'm DYEL by /fit/ AND IRL standards, but I act like I lift on tinder
>tfw I brag to girls about having a better ass than them when I don't even squat 80kg yet
Tinder gains thread? Pic related how do I reply
Who would've guessed that initiating a conversation with a girl by telling her you shat your pants wouldn't end in sex
>it might now, but what if that can also be fixed?
I honestly don't get how they could manage to replicate natural vaginal lubrication. Fake pussies always require lube because they're basically healed open wounds.
desu I wouldn't mind fucking a dickchick if she was hot, but those are rare. what I get drunk and bring some ugly girl home only to find out her dick is bigger than mine
I'm >>35512798 btw. no homo
nah, im that guy, the thought that the person you are about to fuck was once a man is vomit inducing for me
Her bio said something like "My man has 2 jobs."
>but why try this hard in a moldovan prohibition board
Is something wrong with me brehs?
I've gotten plenty of matches on tinder and I know I can chat these girls up and definitely lead it somewhere. But for whatever reason, I just pussy out and don't end up meeting them. I either unmatch or just make up an excuse and stop talking to them. Before anyone asks, no I'm not a virgin, I was in a relationship for the better half of last year and had a shit load of sex.
It's annoying because I see girls on the street and I want to have sex with them. But then again there's a something in the back of my head telling me not to have sex with random people. Am I fucked up? Am I really this insecure or is this a normal thing?
>pic unrelated (high-test queen)
>tfw i've fucked 5 women from okc 2 years ago in one week
i deleted my account and cut contact with all of them, scheduled an STD test and came out clean.
never am i doing such a thing again, it felt really weird once i realized what i was doing.
i haven't had sex in months now and kinda wanna make a tinder account now but holy shit man i'm terrified as fuck, probably have the same mindset as you have now regarding this subject
Yeah, that's happened to one of my best friends multiple times, he made it clear he doesn't want a relationship or anything like that with the girls he was hooking up with and they agreed, but later on they still got salty about it and shit hit the fan.
Pic related is the QT, how do I reply pls
I guess. I'm 29 and had a gf for 9 years. Kind of glad I don't have to deal with any of that shit desu. Back in the day if I wanted to get laid i just went to a club and got drunk.
Holy shit are you me?
>break it off with gf of 2 years.
>single for about a year.
>only have hookups when friends and their gfs play the whole matchmaking bullshit.
>have tinder, chat easily with babes on there, some of them blatantly want the D.
>for some reason never actually commit to meeting them irl.
Idk, maybe it's cause of the fact that I've never been a one night stand kind of guy, always find it more intimate when you really know the person you're fuggin. Or maybe it's cause my standards are way to high and I'm afraid I'll be disappointed when I actually meet them.
Ik ga je moeder van me bed tillen vriend.
I wish. Its more of like they set me up with chicks they know or their girlfriends try to set me up with their friends, most of them female....although I have been fooled before...n-no homo.
Nah man, you got to dumb it down a lot. Theyre just not into advanced humor until they know what you are like normally.
Shit is too unpredictable for them when you first meet them
PAY TEN BUCKS FOR UNLIMITED SWIPES
SHIT DOESNT WORK ASKS ME TO GET A SUB EVEN THOUGH I ALREADY HAVE ONE
ASK TINDER SUPPORT FOR HELP
THEY STOP RESPONDING
STILL HAVENT GOTTEN NY TEN BUCKS BACK OR UNLIMITED SWIPED
Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude I don't even have enough trilby wearing images on my hard drive to signify just how fucking beta you just went
>haha I'm a stupid beta cuck who cant please a woman! Isn't that funny? p-Pls keep talking to me
I don't go fucking everything that walks because I don't want herpes or worse. Statistics have it that 1 out of 6 people has herpes.
Typically nightclub capacity is 1,000 people - think about that for a second. In a packed nightclub you're looking at 100 people having the herps in the same vicinity as you.
I found out my ex-gf was a stripper. Always had crotch itch after fucking her. Broke up with her psycho ass immediately. Washed my dick with Listerine and was tested every month for 6 months afterwards before accepting that I'm clean and it was cool to move on.
Fuck. That. Shit. Not worth it.
>what is self deprecating humour
I was once so horny I decided to just swipe anybody and push up on the first person that I matched with for the night. Ended up being some ham planet that you could tell was fat but couldn't really be sure exactly how bad it is due to those stupid Facebook angles. She initiated conversation pretty quick and made comments about how she wants my large arms *el oh el they're only 16 inches* wrapped around her while she falls asleep on my chest. Asks me if I'm ok with the fact that she's a big girl, and tell her that I can probably still throw her around like a ragdoll. Says she doubts it but I push on , telling her I have a 360lb 5rm squat and I lift heavier things than her on a daily basis. She then sends me a frightened emoji and tells me I need to add a few more lbs to it to get it done. I abort mission. It appears the real joke was my 1rm the whole time. Not even good enough to fuck a fat chick.
Statistically, yes, but only without a condom. Due to people mostly living in the same community most of their life, a stranger is more likely to be from farther away thus potentially offering a higher genetic diversity for the offspring. You should fuck sloots on tinder for the sake of human evolution!
Or go back to pic related.
>breaking out of skelly mode
>muscles aren't big enough to brag
>body fat not low enough for clearly defined abs
>face only pics haven't worked for me thus far
Is there any way to show off on tinder and give myself a better chance? I ain't even bothered for the lay, just a few right swipes that aren't bots. Is shirtless w/ jeans selfie too tryhard?
What are the odds that she has an STD by now?
Last post of the conversation. Before someone calls me autistic because
There was an earlier message saying that she's tired of having "meaningless sex", even though it feels good. I also had no intentions of fucking this one because daddy issues.
>live in bumfuck nowhere central Florida
>only match with fat rednecks
>on family vacation in Panama city Beach
>in the span of 3 days have 4 girls down to fuck
>literally down to fuck, no questions asked
>had no car or way to get away from family
Tinder is 90% where you live
Because it's akward as fuck, meeting strangers with the sole intention of fucking...
I just act around them, as if they were my girlfriend, while being somewhat vocal about the nature of our relationship... It's nice.
WHAT'S HER SUPER HERO NAME /FIT??
What the fuck is this world I live in? I don't even understand this fucked up shit what the fuck man.
How many girls have you had sex with?
You could have banged a post-op tranny without even knowing it.
I hope you haven't had any dark encounters where the "girl" suggested just doing anal.
You were doing fine here, she invited you in her pants but then
you revealed you're a homo/you want to be the little girl and
you insisted like a turbo autist.
Learn to listen, rainman.
>let's have an actual conversation
I showed her didn't I /fit/? ... D-didn't I??
How the fuck can telling a girl you shit your pants not turn her off?
WTF is wrong with women, seriously?
I handsome man can do or say literally anything & they'll still practically beg for his attention.
It seems he got technically BTFO to me too, but 2bh she looked like a turbo autist - on fucking tinder. It's like gettting BTFO by rainman arguing on the number of follicles in a human body whilst you were actually trying to have fun
So I'm not sure that it really counts as BTFO in the real non-autismal world
The final answer by him is the epitome of being butt-hurt anyway.. just stop replying, you're not going to win anything, only lose something more
On the left. She looks fine? Paper bag that please only good use for her is doggy style.
Well, if you're asking if she's a 10, she's not, but she looks fine. She didn't lie on the profile either, and while I don't care much about Kenny Chesney or Jason Aldean, she did show a bit of sass and smart ass while blowing you the fuck out so props to her for being honest I guess. As for you, I suggest you apply some ointment to your anus and move on :^)