Hey effays, valentine's is right around the corner and want to get something sexy to wear or use for my gf. I already got her a hexbug that she uses to stimulate her clit, and her vagina is way too tight to fit anything in.
So was thinking about clothes... Anything sexy or streetwear you think a girl would like?
She's kinda like the girl on the rights body type
it makes my dick diamonds when cuties like my gf wear long sleeve turtlenecks
>getting sextoys for your girlfriend
In all honesty, you are a fucking cuck. You're a cuckold. You may as well get her a hung black dude for her next birthday since you apparently can't do the job. Do you think she just appreciates it and is thankful? Pretty sure she fakes excitement, they all feign excitement at gifts but it's what they think after that counts. Does it ever cross your mind that women might think - and they do - that you need sex toys because your penis doesn't provide enough excitement and pleasure? I've never had to buy a sex toy for my girlfriends, I just fuck them long and raw and hard and it's enough, because I have enough.
The only women who should have sex toys are single women and women in their old age who masturbate recreationally. No young girlfriend should ever have to own a sex toy. What the fuck is the boyfriend for then?
>hurr my extra fun durr
Shut up. You wouldn't need some plastic/material shit if you had enough man meat.
get a load of this GUY, stay frosty my dude
had a girlfriend who told me she was glad I was thick enough because her ex had to do all kind of shit to get her off. the whole whip/clothes/dildo shit
they may seem like they want that kind of thing but they really prefer good, natural fucking, hence why you see women's sexual preference tends to lean towards "real" guys who don't do any of that weird shit
I'm just 7"x6.5" so i'm pretty average, you just don't have to be small
Buy her some nice stockings and maybe a garter belt if you and her like that. She can wear them in real life and feel sexy knowing that under her clothes there is a nice surprise and when she takes of her other clothes there is still that sexy thing.
Nice for you to look at and she will probably feel sexy, which makes any woman (or high school girl in your case) prettier.
>she will probably feel sexy, which makes any woman (or high school girl in your case) prettier.
This isn't true. Many women if not all, lose points when they are giving a blowjob and feeling sexy. You would know this after a while, and it's part of why men have hard time orgasming from blowjobs. A 9/10 becomes a 6/10 when giving a blowjob for some reason, and a 5/10 become a 2/10. That is why the lowest you should date is 3/10 because lower than 0/10 you may as well not get oral. It's mostly becomes most women have weak chins, so when they are opening their mouth like that it looks like a trout sucking for air.
But yes stockings help, the reason above is why when I get oral, I get a mirror and place it in front of me, that way I can see the back of her head bobbing up and down and her ass/thighs in stockings and that's hot af
Go for a cashmere turtleneck instead.
Nothing like resting your face against a pair of cashmere boobies.
Did you ever once think that maybe they attend university states away from each other? Or leave for work trips weeks on end? Or that solo masturbation is a healthy thing to do anyway? Or you getting this mad is why it's so hard for you to get an intelligent & sexy woman? Who hurt you?
>long distance relationships
You sound like a whore who cheats on people. I could identify you as a whore because only a woman could come up with such a shitty twist on the typical "who hurt you" reply
I get enough and I don't need to buy toys to please her because I have enough where it matters. The most I've made a woman orgasm in a day is 5 times and guess what? You won't achieve that with your pencil dick, nor with that Hello Kitty vibrator that you use on your bitch. I took up advice on the internet and did kegel exercises and have been doing them for about 3 years now and not only has it increased my stamina bu also my girth, you better believe my woman won't need some shitty cucumber nor need to pretend she's some slave tied to a bed. I have all she would ever need in my pants because that's how it should be and that's how man has pleased woman since the dawn of time. Why do you think they always leave those weird tiny-dicked Mr. Grey wannabes for people like me.
Want to know how much I last? The longest I've lasted is close to 24 hours. We had a session for about 8 hours, went to sleep and the whole next day we had sex. This was the first time I ever slept with a woman too, I'm not one of those chumps who orgasmed in the first minute - the same kind to later go on to become cuckolds who buy black boyfriends for their girlfriends. Yeah you might think "wow this guy is too good to be true and it's on the internet so I know it's not true", but hear this, everything I say is exactly how it is. From you being a cuckold to my superior sexual drive. Yeah you can keep not believing but know that I'm the better man because I don't need toy shit
Pic related, it's how your girlfriend sees you if you buy a sex toy for her
Holy shit, this guy is still at it?
8.5/10 for determination
It's not an obsession, that's why I said "to be honest, you're a cuck", because I don't use the insult often but it seems the case when you need to buy a sex toy for a girlfriend. Wouldn't you agree it renders the boyfriend useless?
>b-but it's more fun if the boyfriend uses toys hurrr derf
Anything the boyfriend can do with the toy the girl can do herself. If he's going to buy her a toy he may as well find her a new boyfriend
maybe i need to lurk more because i've never seen this pasta before.
>have sex pls
Sounds to me like you're intimidated, that it couldn't possibly be true because you can't possibly imagine yourself being able to do that
I'd say I understand, but I don't
This is gold. Gold, I tell ya!
pls keep posting
that's just the thing, anon - you're just imagining yourself. i almost feel sorry for your crippling autism.
pls have sex.
So you readily admit it's beyond the scope of what you consider possible. It's ok dicklet, but go ahead and post your dick size, I want to laugh at you. In case you haven't noticed, I samefagged, I am this guy:
And everything I typed there is true as well. I bet I've cucked a few men like yourself, weird fucks who buy dragon dildos for their girlfriends (because they can't do it) and then wonder why she leaves you. So compare yourself to me, because I'm obviously the bigger man here. Honestly though, I have typed no fantasy or "imagination", you can insist that I "have sex pls" but I have and do have sex. Perhaps you mean *your* kind of sex, a minute and a half of sluggish thrusts and then pulling out with an ugly grin on your face because you already dribbled out that smelly shit in your phallus. Then, because you are already pathetically finished, you fumble over the counter for that smelly shit-stained dildo and your girlfriend pretends to be happy.
Well she's not, I think we can reach a consensus that people who buy toys for their female partners are better off becoming gay. Why, you ask? Because chances are she has already joked about you to her friends, faggot. Oh and that you keep suggesting i'm a troll doesn't make this any less true, it's just you trying to invalidate what I say because it's too big for you
bro just begin one of ur legendary 24 hour fuck sessions at 11:59 pm february 13, then don't stop until president's day.
if u do it right she'll forget valentines day even happened
>i make up stories and spew them out on the internet so people will think i am a manly pussy slaying stud
>if you don't believe me you have a small penis
nice try fagboy.
PLEASE have sex.
Perfectly logical, I have no reason to lie over the internet, you don't know who I am and never will. So what reason do I have to lie, pray tell
The only explanation is you think it's impossible for you. But that's where you fuck up, because I am not you.
Keep buying your pink dildos bro, got to keep that gf satisfied eh?
you're getting way too riled up, pham. your fedora must be too tight.
have sex pls.
>putting pictures of your bitch on the internet
I told you that you were a cuckold, you probably get off on the thought that someone masturbates to your whore, right? Faggot?
Chances are that if you're posting pictures of her online you think she's disposable anyway, which therefore means you probably know she has already cheated on you.
Yep, she's cheated on you. You're a disaster if this post is true m8
First of all, the toy he bought her was to stimulate her clit, right, do you know what that is? Then you realize it has nothing to do with penetration, which is the only thing a dick is good for, so you're saying she should never need something like that, so then I guess their boyfriend would have to eat them out all the time to get that feeling, because they only need their boyfriend for sex and not themselves? And could you not say the same thing about men never having to use porn if they had a girlfriend because they already have their gf (no extra fun allowed apparently) because they have someone to actually physically fuck? Also, you're retarded.
You never had a chance to win by the end of this thread, because by the end of it, you will still be the weirdo who buys dildos and strange sex toys to make up for what he lacks in manhood, whereas I will be the type of guy your gf leaves you for
You people accuse me of not having sex and then you have stupid posts like these. Well let me enlighten you since you haven't stepped foot in a bedroom: You'd have to be a complete virgin/incompetent to think the penis is solely for penetrating. Heck, you probably think sex is just in and out and in and out. You must be boring as fuck in bed. A good man learns how to stimulate his woman in a way that involves the clitoris whilst keeping a steady and hard fuck. Of course, this option isn't available if you have a pencil dick, but my girth is 6.5" so perhaps my realm of capability is bigger than yours. Or if you're a woman, certainly bigger than those twigs you've dated.
There are several good positions that I have used to make a woman orgasm, and they are effective too, you're a fucking idiot if you think you need a stupid toy.
And no, I don't pay attention to the pornography posted here by desperate dicklets like those ITT. That's why I have my gf. Besides, porn teaches people to be cuckolds because they are basically sitting pathetically in their chair watching two people have sex.
>he still doesn't understand that a sex toy is just an accessory to spice things up, not a supplement for dick
>he's at least a good sport and continues to sperg out for our amusement
i found your v-card, anon. it's still in your pocket.
pls have sex.
>he still doesn't understand that a sex toy is just an accessory to spice things up, not a supplement for dick
But this is exactly what I said earlier, and that's a bullshit reason. "Spice up the bedroom" translates to "my girlfriend doesn't find me exciting enough and pleasurable enough in the bedroom so maybe this will help stimulate by dead piece of shit sex life"
Lmao bro just know you'll be remembered as *that* weird loser once she gets with a real man who can actually fuck her good.
>Moooooooooooods i'm getting BTFO please delete this thread
hahahahah dude you are truly the asperger king. i know no one on earth is actually this spergy and you're trolling, but this is really making my night.
also pls have sex.
>Your gf: "Hey anon I was thinking we might want to spice up our sex life :)"
>You: "Ok honey it's sorely needed h-hehe"
>Your gf: "I met this guy named Jamal today at work, what do you think about a threesome? I read online it helps spice up things"
>You: "U-um ok b-but let it b-b-b-b-b-b-bbb-e a one time th-thing ok"
>Your gf: "Thank you anon you're so great at spicing up our relationship with new things :)"
>Week later after you get cucked in front of you
>You: "W-where is my g-gf I did everything for her"
>Your gf: *hopping on Jamal's cock*
This is you right now.
you use one of these on your girlfriend's clit???
haha bro what the fuck
I've been honest up until now, faggot, do you honestly think you're above some shit? Like, floating above the ground over my experience because you resorted to pathetic sex toys? Because that's what you're implying
Go buy some anal beads bro, spice up that shit right?
>all this projecting
You might need to cool it on the porn for a bit.
oh god bros, someone needs to take over for me. my sides have officially left my body and i'm laughing too hard to type.
pls have sex, anon.
I'm not the one who posted that black whore, and don't worry, I'm aware sex to you is something lame as fuck and that's why you think I'm glorifying the act, because you can't perform well enough to please a woman. Heck, you probably even are the kind who finger them to orgasm. Guess what? She can finger herself to orgasm too
I honestly now feel bad for the women I've been with, chances are they won't ever be satisfied by average/below average performers like yourselves ever again, contrary to my hours long of fucking.
You're probably the kind of moron who uses "sex" in jokes like "doesn't matter, had sex xD". Jokers like you get left, and no amount of spongebob dildos will save you
>I'm a real manly man who does all of the sex
>look how manly I am
>guys you aren't looking, I am being so manly
>guys so what if I have never actually had sex, I'm still a manly man and not some pussy progressive intellectual
>guys why are you laughing?
>he fell for the cuck meme
>he actually thinks that this is a normal occurrence and not just some small niche in the porn industry
It's probably time to cut yourself off from /r9k/
>women i've been with
Dude give it up, no one believes you. You're projecting too hard
pls just have sex
You're an idiot if you think the internet hasn't already spilled onto real life. It's like saying height doesn't matter, being a manlet in denial like that. Likewise, you are a cuck in denial, because you are probably getting cheated on right now
Do you honestly think women get off from some skinnydick fucking them desperately with a shitty toy? Are you fucking serious right now? How can a woman ever see you in the light of a true man when you need a fucking toy to get her off? No, what's going to happen is she will see you as weak and she will leave you for a better man, like me
You say it as though your inferior way of thought has any effect on my reality. I'd have no reason to gesture on if what you say is the case, but it's clearly not
What is happening here is my performance is miles above yours, so much that you can't perceive it in your mind, it's impossible to you because you're just a 4" dicklet who orgasms in a minute
Projecting you say? I don't see how I'm projecting when I'm clearly against sex toys and you are for them (because you need them)
>he thinks toys are a need, not just an added source of pleasure
have sex pls
Pic very much related, it's how your girlfriends friends look like when she tells them about your little dick and how you so desperately waggled your finger in her because you came so early
>he still doesn't get it
have you ever had sex before, anon?
pls have sex
How about you be honest? I already said too much about myself and all you're doing is trying to invalidate what I say
You'll be spending this Valentines Day munching pizza and watching Game of Thrones Season 3 on marathon won't you?
You claim you're not obsessed, yet you're on 4chan's fashion board saying people are being "cucked" by sex toys.
..as for not using this "insult" often, you must've written it over 20 times in this thread alone, so yes, I'd say you've got some sort of hang up on the thought of someone else's partner being fucked. To use your own terms, you're second-hand "cucking" yourself.
In what fucking way would it render someone's partner useless? "Put that penis away Anon and give me my dildo!"?
The way you're talking about sex and even relationships in general really makes me question wether you've ever had a partner, on top of obviously not being sexually active.
For example, the fact that you seem to think women in relationships don't masturbate.
>There are several good positions that I have used to make a woman orgasm
Hahaha, oh wow, this is gold. This is just not how sex works, it's not a game where you button mash the right places until you get a FATALITY and win.
Good guess. Walking dead. we'll probably have sex too if we're in the mood. if you weren't a virgin you'd know that sex isn't some big event that needs to happen all the time. Except it may be for you since you've clearly never had it.
pls have sex, anon
Of course it's not a button mashing game you fat fucking virgin, nobody has implied that at any point
You fucking dicklets are pissing me off with all these (you)s, you're the butthurt ones who won't shut up because I obviously BTFO you for being toy-using pussies
Point being what you've described makes it painfully obvious you're lying? Not even the "performance"-part, because having sex in the evening and then - fasten your seatbelts - having sex AGAIN the day after!!! is actually a pretty common occurrence and not very impressive.
maaaaaaaan if being an autistic virgin was effay you'd be dick ovens himself
have sex pls
I broke up with my partner of 5 years a month ago ya dunce, have slept with a lot of people since. The partner I had before this one owned a vibrator, but here's the shocker - we didn't use it while having sex, she used it while masturbating. Not saying we never tried it, but it got too intense and she'd come too fast. Jesus fucking christ dude.
Think of it like this, dicklets, if your gf is masturbating while you are around and available to fuck her, be it in a few hours or after work, chances are she's not fucking thinking of you, she's thinking of a bigger, real man, fucking her raw, not some skinny white boy who literally practices his finger wagging dildo-shoving technique when he's by himself
That should make perfect logical sense, even to dense fucking limpdicks like yourself. Oh? What's that? You're now telling me it's OK if she thinks of other men while you "fuck" her? Well guess what, she will only ever remember you as *that* minute man. That is all you will ever be, that "sex xD" loser
And you haven't even posted your dick size even though I have, clearly you are a smaller man. It's ok guy, well not really, it's not going to be OK for you, you will never keep a woman. They have their dildo, why do they need you right? Oh that's right, you're her fucking wallet you wholesome sack of shit
>guise pls make up your dick size on the internet like i did
anon, you are by far the most entertaining sperglord i've encountered here in awhile
pls have sex
You've got some serious insecurity issues and I suggest you work on that, if you ever want to have a functional love/sex life. Seriously, none of your insults get to me or the other people in this thread, because they're just your own fears and confidence issues projected wildly.
I just told you I've left a relationship that lasted 5 years, do you really think going for my ability to "keep" a partner would work? It doesn't make sense.
5 years ago you were, what, 11-13 years old?
are you seriously challenging me to a cock fight
why'd you even do that when you've said yourself you've got an average sized dick?
Have soms fucking dignity, dude. Salvage what you can after this trainwreck of a thread and be glad you're anonymous.
I haven't even got measuring tape, so I can't measure my girth even if I wanted to - which I don't, because I'm not a child.
seriously dude, take a break from the internet and work on your issues.
>cuck cuck cuck cuck jamal cuck
seriously what happened to you, where did this strange fixation come from? did ya get scared by a big horse as a child or something?
I just woke up and went to see if the thread was still alive.
I genuinely love this song, its fun af
also the level of shitposting in this thread is next level. Overcompensating and lying about your sex life isn't /fa/ at all, neither is projecting :-)
just b happy with yourself or at least with your relationships
This is my gf.
I mean, just look at the filename which clearly proves that I took the picture with my phone!
Her name's Jodie, she's really sweet and caring. I was thinking of buying her some anal beads or a huge butt plug for Valentine's. You know, to spice things up a bit.